The Bell To Bell News Report 07.26.09

Posted by Jasper Gerretsen on 07.26.2009

In this lighter than usual edition of the Bell to Bell News Report, I step in to replace Randy Harrison, who is unable to make it due to unfortunate but unforeseen circumstances. Besides this week's shows I'll also be covering Dragon Gate's big USA debut, TNA drama and the untimely passing of former developmental wrestler Damien Steele.



Greetings one and all, and welcome to a special edition of the Bell to Bell news report coming to you from all the way across the Atlantic. I'm stepping in for Randy Harrison this week, who is unable to make it due to some unfortunate unforeseen circumstances. This leaves me to recap this week's shows (the ones that I got to see) and go through the major news. I'll also have a special preview of the debut show of Dragon Gate USA.






Monday Night Raw Results:

- Kofi Kingston, Primo, & Montel Vontavious Porter beat Jack Swagger, Carlito, & The Big Show (Primo pins Carlito, springboard headbutt)
- Jerry "The King" Lawler beats THE Brian Kendrick (pinfall, fistdrop)
- Mark Henry beats Chris Jericho (disqualification, steel chair shot)
- Sharp Dressed Man match: Hornswoggle beats Chavo Guerrero
- ZZ Top Legs match: Rosa Mendes and Alicia Fox beat Kelly Kelly and Gail Kim (Alicia pins Kelly, small package)
- Handicap match: John Cena and Triple H beat Legacy (Cena pins Orton, rollup)

Rock legends ZZ Top were our hosts for the go-home RAW for Night of Champions. On the RAW side of the card we have three and a half matches (Legacy challenging Jericho and a mystery partner for the tag titles, Maryse defends the butterfly strap against Mickie James, Kofi Kingston's United States championship is on the line in a six pack challenge and Orton defends the WWE title against both Cena and Triple H.

We started off the night with John Cena in the ring. He cut a fairly generic promo about Sunday's title match, reminding the fans that they're getting a rematch of the main event of Wrestlemania 24. This brought out Orton to point out just who walked out of that show with the belt. Eventually Legacy joined in to threaten the beatdown, but Hunter made the save. Some back and forth banter followed, and Randy Orton ended up added to the main event to make it a handicap match.

We cut back to tonight's guest hosts of RAW. ZZ Top might seem a little out of place hosting RAW, but apparently they are genuine wrestling (and WWE) fans as evidenced by their attendance of Wrestlemania X7. Their actual interactions with the wrestlers were mostly limited. They stayed in their own little studio area as various wrestlers dropped by. It started off with Santino Marella, who got his very own Zzzz Top makeover, complete with cheap sunglasses.

Our first match of the night was a six man tag pitting the babyfaces against the heels of Sunday's sixpack challenge. It was a decent enough opener, with everyone playing their part as can be expected. It ended with everyone taking everyone out of the ring, and the last two men remaining creating the finish, in this case Primo pinning Carlito. Afterwards Big Show destroys everybody to remind everybody that he's big.

We went back to ZZ Top, who were shilling for their current tour. Chris Jericho joined them and brings up Fozzy, which draws a blank with Gibbons and Hill. Eventually a rematch between Jericho and Henry is set up, and we go to commercial as the band plays La Grange. When the show came back we went into a pointless segment and two minute match where Jerry Lawler beat THE Brian Kendrck in just over two minutes. This was followed up by Josh Matthews holding a classic on-stage interview with Mickie James to promote her title match this Sunday. The Miz interrupted, and a bunch of sexual innuendo followed which ended with Mickie getting a blast of hairspray to the face from Maryse.

After that we got Chavo Guerrero complaining to ZZ Top to set up the completely ridiculous "Sharp Dressed Man" match. The fewer words wasted on this atrocity the better. Remember when Chavo was a vicious bastard? It seems like he played the stupid goof for at least two years now, but he actually showed shades of himself last year in a great match against Evan Bourne. I still don't know why they're making Chavo do all this stupid comedy crap. It seems like he could be so much more useful as the vicious heel rather than the comedy guy.

After Chris Jericho left the arena under the jeers of Legacy, the show cut back to a ZZ Top Legs match, which apparently means nothing more than divas competing in shorts. Nothing wrong with that of course. It did leave me wandering what the hell Gail Kim is doing. She has done absolutely nothing noteworthy since coming back to WWE, except of course expose the TNA Knockouts division as the one woman show that it really was. I guess that's enough for Vince, and I'm sure she'll eventually get to feud for the title by simple process of elimination.

Finally we had our main event for the night, Triple H and Cena defeating Orton and Legacy. The heel team just can't seem to get a win when working as a unit, no matter how well the odds seem to favour them on paper. Speaking of the heel team, I have to say that the part where they were actually in control of the match was criminally boring.

Overall it wasn't much to write home about. ZZ Top were alright as guest stars, and their actual presence on the show was kept to a bare minimum, which I guess is a good thing. Unfortunately RAW is just in a terrible state right now. The main event scene is stale as hell, and at the same time there's nothing on the undercard that makes me want to tune in. There's plenty of guys like Bourne and Swagger that could be worth watching, but more often than not they seem to be lost in the shuffle.



ECW on SyFy Results:

- Yoshi Tatsu beats William Regal (pinfall, roundhouse kick)
- Ezekiel Jackson beats Mike Williams (pinfall, uranage slam)
- Shelton Benjamin beats Goldust (pinfall, Paydirt)
- Tyler Rekks beats Paul Burchill (pinfall, schoolboy)

This week's edition of ECW on SyFy opened with Yoshi Tatsu taking on veteran William Regal. This match shows exactly why Regal is perfect for ECW and its New Talent Initiative. Even though Tatsu has only been active for four weeks the crowd is already solidly behind him. William Regal's pre-match comments about foreigners only added fuel to the fire, and the crowd was all over him. Even though the match itself was only six minutes long, it was still great to watch and t seems that, for the moment at least, Tatsu's future on ECW is secure.

In the second match of the night Ezekiel Jackson squashed local jobber Mike Williams. It was a typical get-the-big-guy-over squash, but as an added twist it actually seemed to give Jackson some direction. After the match was over Vladimir Kozlov came out to hit his finisher on what was left of the jobber, with the commentary team speculating that Kozlov was looking to prove his superiority over Jackson. I really don't need to see a feud between these two, if only because it would make Kozlov's win over Dreamer from a few weeks ago completely pointless.

Shelton Benjamin made quick work of Goldust, hitting the Paydirt for the victory in what's possibly the most pointless match of the week. Benjamin is still going nowhere fast, and I doubt a feud with Goldust would help make the publc care about him again. All I can really do is hope that Benjamin is given a shot at whoever wins the title match this Sunday. In the fourth and final match of the night current WWE developmental champion Tyler Rekks beat Paul Burchill, who somehow still has a job. Burchill jumping Rekks from behind seemed to signal the start of a TV only mini-feud, which is something I can live with.

We ended the night with the Abraham Washington show, which was just as awkward and painful to watch as it had been previously. It featured Tommy Dreamer and Christian promoting their ECW title match at Night of Champions. Now obviously this isn't the match that is going to get people to buy the show, but it's still the only match ECW gets to put on the card and as such I'd have liked to see a better build.



WWE Superstars Results:

- Christian beats William Regal (pinfall, sunset flip)
- Evan Bourne beats Jamie Noble (pinfall, Air Bourne)
- John Morrison beats Kane (disqualification, chair shot)

The first match of Superstars was exactly what you'd expect of these two. Regal especially was in top form, fighting like the vicious bastard we've come to know and love. At the eleven minute mark Christian picked up the win with a second rope sunset flip, sending a clear message as to why he deserves to be the number one contender for Dreamer's title.

In the second match two ROH alumni collide, although my trivia lobe fails me as to whether or not these two actually met in an ROH ring. I know they were both involved with the 2005 IWA-MS TPI tournament, which Bourne won and Noble left in the first round. Anyway, the match itself was solid, nearly six minutes, with Bourne picking up the win with the usual SSP. Nothing overly exciting, but at least Bourne got some more TV time even if he was shafted out of his rightful spot on the Night of Champions card.

In the main event John Morrison took on Kane, who recently made his return after several weeks of sitting at home. At that point the best creative could come up with for him was another feud with Kahli. Of course it's not entirely a rehash, as the face and heel roles have switched, but seeing these two lock up again is pretty damn low on my wrestling wish list. It was a predictable back and forth match, with Kane wailing on Morrison and Morrison trying to keep control with kicks and high flying. In the end, all it did was further the Kane vs. Great Kahli feud, in stead of furthering Morrison's move up the card as it should.



TNA Impact Results:

X-Division championship match: Homicide© beats Samoa Joe (disqualification, ref punching)
Legends championship match: Kevin Nash beats Amazing Red (pinfall, Jacknife Powerbomb)
TNA Tag Team championship match: Scott Steiner and Booker T beat the security guys
Knockouts Battle Royal for $50.000 and a spot in the MEM: Traci Brooks wins, last eliminating Kong and Tara. Brooks was supposed to be the special referee in this match.
Doug Williams, Brutus Magnus, Rob Terry, Sheik Bashir and Kiyoshi beat Beer Money, AJ Styles, Daniels and Eric Young (Williams pins AJ after Eric Young hits him with a piledriver)
Office Keys on a Pole match: Mick Foley beats Kurt Angle (disqualification)

Boy, the jokes just write themselves, don't they? We have a DQ, a completely pointless squash, a title match involving two guys who were basically brought in as extras, a referee winning a match, an unexciting heel turn and a pole match that ends in a disqualification. Oh, and we have a second heel stable, consisting of Eric Young, Sheik Abdul Bashir, Kyoshi and the British Invasion. I really wanted to do a proper recap of this match, but after watching the first 30 minutes just for the sake of writing this news report I just gave up on it. I know I do a column about historical comparisons, but I doubt I'll ever need to do one on WCW and TNA. I can just show the Youtube clips of this episode of Impact.

Play them off, Keyboard Cat:





Friday Night Smackdown Results:

- Jeff Hardy beats Chris Jericho (pinfall, Swanton Bomb)
- The Great Kahli beat Mike Knox (pinfall, Punjabi Plunge)
- Dolph Ziggler beat Finlay (countout)
- Eve Torres beat Natalya (pinfall, moonsault
- R-Truth beat Charlie Haas (pinfall, Rocker Dropper)
- Rey Mysterio beat CM Punk (disqualification, Ziggler-ference)

Thankfully the blue brand saved my faith in wrestling again this week. We started off with Jeff Hardy taking on Chris Jericho. While these two haven't had as much interaction as some of the other stars on SmackDown, they still had a fine little TV match that ended with Jeff picking up the win with the Swanton. I'm surprised they went with the clean win here, considering how little interactions they have had outside of Jericho taking Hardy's intercontinental title after Hardy's second suspension early in 2008. An extended feud between these two, with or without the title, could be great.

Next up we got Mike Knox getting murdered by The Great Kahli, despite interference from Kane's pyro. Like the superstars match from the night before this only served to advance the Kane/Kahli feud. What does confuse me is why the hell they'd want to job out Knox so easily. I know he hasn't been on TV much, but couldn't they just as easily have brought in some jobber in stead?

In the third match of the night Dolph Ziggler beat Finlay by countout. No idea why Finlay didn't just get pinned here, as he isn't exactly doing much. The match itself was short but physical, with Maria coming into play near the end to help Dolph take the countout win.

In an atrocious diva match, Eve Torres beat Natalya with a moonsault. I guess this is one way to keep the Cryme Tyme/Hart Dynasty feud going, but it was almost painful to watch just how much further ahead Natalya is of Eve when it comes to in ring talent.

In the fifth match R-Truth got a quick win over Charlie Haas, who didn't even get an intro. Normally I'd say that I'd hope for the Haas/Knox tag team to get off the ground somehow, but after watching Knox get splattered earlier tonight I doubt that a tag team would help either man much, even if the WWE tag team division wasn't all but empty right now.

The main event pitted champion against champion as CM Punk took on Rey Mysterio. The match itself was good enough, about what you'd expect from the two. Unfortunately the fact that a big PPV was right around the corner meant that we got the inevitable run-ins, and soon enough both Dolph Ziggler and Jeff Hardy got involved in the proceedings. This led to the obvious DQ, which is a shame because these two were having an awesome match up to this point. Of course in this case the hard sell for the PPV was more important, and the show worked just fine in achieving that.



ROH on HDNet Results:

Unfortunately, I was unable to watch this show due to timezone related shenanigans.




MAIN EVENT

After months of hype, the Japanese Dragon Gate made its United States debut in The Arena in front of a nearly sold-out crowd. This Japanese promotion started in 2004 from what was left of the Toryumon promotion after Último Dragón left. The company quickly formed its own fan following, thanks to its own unique style that combines the Mexican Lucha Libre style with innovative submission wrestling and dynamic characters that will appeal to a younger crowd.

Despite the large number of stables in Dragon Gate, they're only bringing eight of their wrestlers in for their debut. Naruki Doi versus Shingo, Dragon Kid versus Masato Yoshino and BxB Hulk versus Yamato make up the triple main event for the first show, with CIMA and Susumu Yokosuka teaming against PWG standouts The Young Bucks lower on the card. The card is rounded out by an eight man CHIKARA showcase pitting Mike Quackenbush, Jigsaw, Fire Ant and Soldier Ant against Hallowicked, Amasis, Gran Akuma and Icarus, and a match between former WWE star Ken Doane and veteran 2 Cold Scorpio.

While Dragon Gate s traveling light, the majority of talent they're bringing in has had extensive exposure in the United States through ROH, PWG and TNA. Of course the local wrestling fans should be familiar with the CHIKARA product, and Ken Doane and 2 Cold Scorpio are recognizable names as well. All this rounds out to an incredibly solid looking card that will no doubt draw a decent enough crowd to The Arena, especially if you consider all the special packages and autograph options Dragon Gate is offering its fans.

It should be obvious for those of you who have been keeping up with the news that Dragon Gate is obviously looking to move in on ROH's turf. Not only is Philadelphia a major market for ROH, Dragon Gate also brought in former ROH booker Gabe Sapolski as its vice president and will be broadcast by ROH's former PPV provider. Of course it should be noted that Dragon Gate did not steal ROH's PPV contract, but ROH simply decided to stop recording PPVs for the foreseeable future due to the general effects the declining economy has had on the company.

So will Dragon Gate USA be successful? Only time will tell obviously, but at the moment all signs seem to point to yes. They've set up a solid first card, chosen a great venue and seem to be doing everything they can to bring fans to the arena. They haven't overloaded the card with their own wrestler, in stead choosing to only bring in a few wrestlers that the American audience is already somewhat familiar with and filling up the rest of the card with local talent.

Unfortunately the results of the show weren't available by the time this news report was submitted, and I apologize for that.

Featured Bouts

While I trashed TNA pretty hard earlier in this news report (although obviously not as hard as they seem to be trashing themselves at the moment, TNA does have several awesome Youtube videos up at the moment. Unfortunately this only makes watching Impact more painful, as I keep thinking back to just how awesome TNA could be. Anyway, here's some of those brilliant matches that TNA has been uploading lately:


June 2002: The First TNA X Title Match


AMW vs. Triple X Cage Match


Global Impact: Kurt Angle vs. Yuji Nagata

The Midcard

-- In what promises to be the most riveting wrestling drama since the Hogan divorce, Jeff Jarrett is apparently sitting at home due to the fact that Angle doesn't appreciate the fact that he's been shacking up with his ex-wife. All this exploded due to a mysterious phone call to the Bubba the Love Sponge Radio Show, and TNA officials are still trying to figure out who is behind this. Angle now seems to refuse to sign a new contract while Jarrett has any kind of creative control, and most of the TNA locker room is actually siding with Angle on this one. Part of me desperately wants this to be some kind of elaborate work, but at this point TNA seems to be coming out looking bush league either way.

-- Former WWE developmental wrestler Damien Steele passed away unexpectedly due to unknown causes. Steele teamed with Ray Gordy (Jesse) as Ebony and Ivory in the WWE developmental system, with each wrestler working a gimmick that would be considered a stereotype of the other wrestler's race. There is currently talk of doing a charity event for the children that Damien left behind. 411 would like to send our condolences to the family, friends and fans of Mr. Steele.

-- In lighter news, WWE is considering several new DVD ideas. These include talent profiles for, among others, Jericho, Steamboat, Punk, Lesnar and Sting, and compilations such as "craziest moments", giants and monsters, wargames and Clash of Champions. There are several great ideas here, but I doubt most of them will end up seeing the light of day. Sting won't get a DVD compilation until he's retired and Lesnar won't get one as long as he's involved in MMA. As for the compilations, some ideas actually sound pretty interesting until you consider how little Vince likes to acknowledge the quality of anything he didn't personally produce.

Jerking The Curtain

BRYAN (July 16, 2009)--The Pachuca family of Bryan says an image on their pickup truck is a miracle.

The image that came in an unlikely form of a bird dropping appeared on Sunday.

That was the first time Salvador Pachuca had been back to the home since having an accident there four months ago.

"I told my brothers come over here and see what this is and they say this is the Virgin," he said.

Family members made their way outside to see the image on the truck's side mirror.

Cristal Pachuca said she took pictures and began making calls to invite others to see, what she describes as, a miracle.

"We just all feel protected. It's a blessing to our family and to everybody that comes to see it," says Cristal Pachuca.

Cristal says the truck doesn't get much use, but last weekend her husband decided to take it out of their garage and wash it.

A few moments later the image appeared.

Since Sunday, a steady stream of family, friends, neighbors and strangers has stopped by to pray and take pictures of the image.

The Pachuca's say the image is more than a coincidence especially since it happened on the 12th.

The family says in Mexico, Dec. 12 is celebrated as the day of The Virgin Guadalupe.

Onlookers say the image is a miracle because the distinct colors and outline of the image on the truck match the image of Virgin Guadalupe.

The Pachuca's say they will continue to welcome anyone who wants to see the image, because the image isn't going to go away anytime soon.

"I think we're going to just put it on a shelf outside, probably take off the mirror and keep it there cause its something special to us. I'm not going to wash it off," says Cristal Pachuca.

The Final Bell

Well, that's it for me this week. I have to admit that I underestimated the work that goes into writing a news report, especially on such short notice. Thankfully Harrison will be back next week. To give you an idea of how badly I misjudged the workload of writing this news report: the local time at the time of submission is 3:50 AM, and my mother will be taking me shoe shopping tomorrow. I didn't dare mention that I was staying up late to write a wrestling news report, afraid of reminding her of the incident about two years ago when she caught me and one of my friends singing along to Shawn Michaels' entrance theme.