The Wrestling News Experience: 09.14.09

Posted by Stephen Randle on 09.14.2009

In this Experience, we have Breaking Point results from Montreal and a preview for Raw in Toronto tonight, plus, who's really to blame for Jeff Hardy, WWE vs the NFL Part II, a titanic struggle for the ages, and your last chance to learn about the TWNE Live Event Giveaway!

Monday, September 14th, 2009

From 411Mania's Canadian offices in Kitchener, Ontario, Canada, this is The Wrestling News Experience, with Stephen Randle!


Legen-wait for it…

Good morning everyone, and welcome to the Experience, I am Stephen Randle and thanks to seven hours working a grill at the University of Waterloo football game, I'm rocking a massive sunburn. And just a tip for all you burn victims, cats are attracted to the smell of aloe, so, don't put it anywhere you don't want them going after. One day, you will thank me for that information. Oh, and Waterloo lost the game by nearly forty points, so I'm glad I went to Laurier instead.

Moving on.



Lansdell had live coverage.

The Big Show and Chris Jericho defeated MVP and Mark Henry to retain the Unified Tag Team Championship (Jericho pinned Henry, KO punch)

Kofi Kingston defeated The Miz to retain the United States Championship (pinfall, Trouble In Paradise)

Legacy defeated D-Generation X in a Submissions Count Anywhere match (Rhodes and DiBiase submitted HBK, ringpost figure-four/Million Dollar Dream combo)

I'm more than willing to admit I was wrong, I really, really didn't see D-X taking the loss here, but from what I read, it was done to perfection. I would guess they're both really sold on the idea that both men can be big stars. Rhodes did impress me with his promo and match with Cena on Monday, which is actually the first time I've seen anything in him, so maybe they do have a bright future.

Kane defeated The Great Khali in a Singapore Cane Match (pinfall, chokeslam)

Can this be over now?

Christian defeated William Regal to retain the ECW Championship (pinfall, Killswitch)

Alleged awesomeness of the match aside, this pretty much shows they have no real long-term plans for either man, and this match served notice that both are being completely wasted on ECW. Just transition the belt to Shelton so he can lose the "main event choker" label and put Christian and Regal on Smackdown so they can put on their show in front of a larger audience.

John Cena defeated Randy Orton in an "I Quit" match to win the WWE Championship

A lot of people seem to be upset both at Cena's quick Superman comeback at the end and the fact that Orton gave up so quickly. Really, what they should be upset about is that likely the reason why Cena won the title is so Orton can chase it for a few months and thus artificially extend the feud. Seriously, the result doesn't matter, the feud isn't going to change. Which is sad.

CM Punk defeated The Undertaker in a Submission Match to retain the World Heavyweight Championship (submission, Montreal Screwjob)

So, once again, we're the ones who need to let it go?

I don't normally respond to the Comments section, but in the Roundtable on Saturday, someone misinterpreted my statement that Taker doesn't need the belt to be popular as whining that Taker hogs the belt. I know that's not true, all his title reigns add up to a very short amount of time. My point was, when you put Taker in a title match, because of the "mystique" behind his character that has built up, it seems like WWE Creative only has two possibly finishes for his title matches: a) he wins the title, or b) he loses in either a massive screwjob or due to half a dozen people interfering. And neither of those finishes is really conducive to maintaining the momentum of a fairly new heel act who already played "hot potato" with the belt during the Hardy feud. If they could bring themselves to believe that a clean loss would not hurt the Undertaker (or stop writing themselves into a corner like a submission match when he's never lost a match by submission in his career), and that same clean win would give Punk instant killer credibility (see: Mankind back in the day), then you could potentially create a massive hot commodity. Instead, we get…what we got, where Undertaker lost but never submitted, with Teddy Long playing the role of Vince despite not actually being a bad guy. But of course, we have to set up the next PPV, where it's likely Punk will escape with a win somehow, and everyone will say "See, Undertaker puts people over". However, for this PPV, the entire thing just stinks of bad writing and unwillingness to commit to making Punk the center of the show despite being the champion.

Anyway, Buddy?



Buddy Wasn't Alive in 1997, So He Has No Idea What's Going On




Tonight's Host:

That's Right, Canadians Are Hotter Than You

Last night at Breaking Point, John Cena ended the most recent Age of Orton, forcing Orton to commit the greatest act of humiliation, uttering the words "I Quit" during their WWE title match. The Viper is sure to bounce back quickly, however, and will almost certainly have his eyes set on regaining his most prized possession.

Meanwhile, Legacy took a giant step forward last night by demolishing D-Generation X at Breaking Point, forcing Shawn Michaels to tap out while Triple H crawled helplessly on the entrance ramp. Will this loss remind Shawn that he didn't really want to come back in the first place? And how will Legacy feel now that they are the winners while their leader, Randy Orton, left Breaking Point without his title and dignity?

And Batista, currently undergoing rehabilition following a nasty injury suffered at the hands of Orton and Legacy, is scheduled to make a big announcement tonight on Raw. What will the Animal have to say, and how will it affect Raw, and indeed, WWE in its entirety?

Plus, both Kofi Kingston and the Unified Tag Champions Chris Jericho and Big Show left Montreal with their title reigns intact, and will be looking for new challengers. And what will Canadian Diva legend and special guest host Trish Stratus have up her sleeves for all the Superstars? Hopefully something a little smarter than the last thing a guest host did in Canada.

All this, and keep an eye out, because I have the day off and I may just give in, drive to Toronto, and attempt to choke Michael Cole until he expires (okay, not really, but the temptation is there), tonight on Raw in Toronto!



You Can't Say You Weren't Warned

Just in case you hadn't heard by now, Jeff Hardy was arrested following a raid on his house last week, and the discovery of various painkillers, steroids, and recreational drug residue found therein. His fiancé, who was also in the house at the time of the raid, was not arrested because she isn't a big name pro wrestler who can be splashed across the pages of newspapers under banner headlines reading "Another Wrestling Drug Addict" and underneath the secondary headline of "Is The Next Chris Benoit Far Away?". Hardy's charges are extensive, and most damning are those related to drug trafficking, due to the amount of drugs found in his house. North Carolina is a state well-known for its harsh penalties for drug arrests, especially in trafficking cases, and Hardy faces a possible maximum penalty of 14 years in jail if convicted.

First off, finding painkillers in Jeff Hardy's house, especially three weeks after he threw himself off a gigantic ladder through a table for our amusement, then followed that up with a cage match two days later, is about as surprising as the fact that a match last night ended with a Montreal finish. Secondly, the timing of the alleged "tip" and ensuing raid, barely a month after his contract expired with WWE, seems incredibly coincidental somehow. A cynical fan might suggest that someone out there waited until Hardy was out from under the protective WWE umbrella, and had his guard down due to no longer being on the road or under contract, then decided that catching a "drug dealing rassler" in the act would make a nice political platform come re-election.

Of course, this does not fully excuse Hardy, who, if the two Wellness strikes, the previous releases from both TNA and WWE, and having his entire drug problem used as a main event storyline and plastered over WWE TV for months, still can't admit that he might still be fighting the demons of drug addiction, might be in need of the serious wake-up call that being arrested can give. And this will also continue to reflect badly on WWE, their Wellness plan, and the fact that wrestlers continue to get caught with illegal drugs, die early, and generally get caught doing bad things at the worst possible time. I do believe that WWE honestly wants their talent to be clean, healthy, and long-lived, but I'm also pretty sure that there are holes big enough to drive Optimus Prime through (with cargo container), especially if you are a main eventer or sell significant amounts of merchandise.

The bottom line is, if history has proven anything, this is only going to get worse before it ever gets the slightest bit better, and hopefully Jeff Hardy is still around for the "better", and manages to be avoid being part of the "worse'.

Something He Should Have Already Known

(That would be "don't choke women unless you want to get arrested").

And it just keeps going, as former WCW and WWE wrestler and current MMA competitor Sean O'Haire, long considered one of the most misused talents of all time, was arrested last week on charges of assaulting his girlfriend. O'Haire had previously been arrested on similar charges of assaulting a women in a bar a few years ago, but those charges were dismissed. This time, the situation seems bleak for the former Superstar, the evidence damning, and yet another bad ending to a promising career.

I swear, it's so depressing following wrestling some days, I nearly run out of jokes. If only WWE would try to take on the NFL again so I could take free shots at the XFL.

Proof Vince Can Learn, He Just Usually Refuses

Thank you, Santa!

Yes, this time, Vince McMahon has seen the light, and rather than attempt to go head-to-head with the NFL Playoffs in January, something WWE has avoided at all costs (I mean, other than try and create an entire football league to compete with them for some reason), WWE has moved the date of the Royal Rumble to the end of January. Can you imagine if the scheduling conflict happened during these stretches where a PPV happens every three weeks instead of the Royal Rumble-No Way Out-WrestleMania stretch of nearly four months? There might be the potential for two weeks between PPVs! That'd result in hardly any time to build matches and the possibility of bad, thrown-together PPVs that nobody wants to see! Or, as I like to call it, Judgment Day through Night of Champions!

And Yet, If They Put It In The Ring, We Wouldn't Care

News arose last week that a backstage fight broke out between two of the largest men working in any industry, The Big Show and The Great Khali. And while neither man is the quickest by any stretch, Khali is known for having killed a man (okay, not really, it was an unfortunate accident, but it sounds good in a real fight) and Show spent his time off from WWE a couple years ago training to potentially become a pro boxer. Apparently the fight stemmed from Show complaining that some "big man" moves should be entirely his property, and the belief that Khali should not be allowed to use them. Frankly, restricting a man who only knows an overhand chop, choke bomb, and vice grip from learning new moves seems like a bad idea, but by that same token, what the hell moves was Khali using that Show considers exclusively his? For that matter, what moves has Show ever done exclusively? The chokeslam used to be like fifteen different people's finisher, twice that many use a spear, and I'm pretty sure you can't stop the entire roster from punching.

Free Stuff!

All right, this is your last warning, your last chance to prepare, because the TWNE Live Event Giveaway is set to get underway this Tuesday in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. The cowboy hat has been nixed by powers beyond my control who refuse to believe that the hat plays, but everything else is still set to go. Check out last week's Experience for the appropriate description and ways to find me, and remember, this is all for a very real prize….The Rise and Fall of WCW or Macho Madness: The Randy Savage Collection DVD, depending on what's available when I go shopping today. Yes, you have the chance to win one of these fine products, courtesy of 411 and The Wrestling News Experience.

Ties will be resolved at my own discretion, because I'm in charge and I say so. Try not to trample any small children, someone might get upset. Only one person can win, but last time, only three people actually found me, so your chances are better than you think. I'd mention that I'm open to bribes, but if you're not first, I won't have anything else to give you anyway. Autograph and photo requests, as always, will be honoured because I have a massive ego. Lansdell, you can't win, but if you actually show up, maybe I'll buy you that drink we keep talking about. Maybe. May the best fan win, see you in Hamilton!



Inactive List as of 09.07.09

WWE Raw

- Batista, out 4 months as of June 9th (biceps)
- Maryse, out indefinitely as of July 28th (knee surgery)

WWE SmackDown

- Edge, out indefinitely as of July 4th (torn Achilles tendon)
- Michelle McCool, day-to-day as of August 1st (knee injury)
- Rey Mysterio, out 30 days as of September 3rd (Wellness violation)

ECW

- No reported injuries

TNA

- Jeff Jarrett, TNA, out indefinitely as of July 21st (self-imposed suspension)

Transactions

- Kelly Kelly, RAW, day-to-day as of September 11th (knee)

- Mickie James, RAW, day-to-day as of September 7th (popped implant)

Had to be done.

- Roxxi, TNA, returned to action on September 10th Impact



WWE

**NEW** WWE Champion: John Cena
- 1 day reign, defeated Randy Orton in an "I Quit" Match on September 13th (Breaking Point PPV)

World Heavyweight Champion: CM Punk
- 22 day reign, defeated Jeff Hardy in a TLC Match on August 23rd (SummerSlam PPV)

ECW Champion: Christian
- 50 day reign, defeated Tommy Dreamer on July 26th (Night of Champions PPV)

WWE Intercontinental Champion: John Morrison
- 10 day reign, defeated Rey Mysterio on September 4th (Smackdown)

WWE United States Champion: Kofi Kingston
- 106 day reign, defeated MVP on June 1st Raw

WWE Undisputed Tag Team Champions: Chris Jericho and The Big Show
- 50 day reign (as team of Chris Jericho and Big Show), The Big Show named as replacement for former champion Edge on July 26th (Night of Champions PPV)
- 38 day reign (as team of Chris Jericho and Edge), defeated former champions The Colons and Legacy in a Triple Threat Match on June 28th (The Bash PPV)

WWE Women's Champion: Michelle McCool
- 78 day reign, defeated Melina on June 28th (The Bash PPV)

WWE Diva's Champion: Mickie James
- 50 day reign, defeated Maryse on July 26th (Night of Champions PPV)

TNA

TNA Heavyweight Champion: Kurt Angle
- 85 day reign, defeated former champion Mick Foley, Samoa Joe, AJ Styles, and Jeff Jarrett in a King of the Mountain Match on June 21st (Slammiversary PPV)

TNA Tag Team Champions: Scott Steiner and Booker T
- 57 day reign, defeated Beer Money, Inc. on July 19th (Victory Road PPV)

TNA X-Division Champion: Samoa Joe
- 29 day reign, defeated Homicide on August 16th (Hard Justice PPV)

TNA Knockouts Champion: ODB
- 29 day reign, defeated former champion Angelina Love and Velvet Sky in a tag match on August 16th (Hard Justice PPV)

TNA Knockouts Tag Team Champions: VACANT
- Tournament to crown first ever Champions will conclude at No Surrender

TNA Legends Champion: Kevin Nash
- 29 day reign, defeated Mick Foley on August 16th (Hard Justice PPV)



Harrison and James have the weekend news reports.

The Triple Threat talks Breaking Point and Mr Kennedy

Ari has Column of Honor.

Remington has Takin A Mulligan.



411 will have live coverage of Raw tonight starting at 9 pm EDT.

Remember, if you love poker, and are in the Kitchener-Cambridge-Waterloo area, check out Player's Poker League.

And for the drunken ramblings of Sean Carless and his merry band of reprobates, check out The Wrestling Fan.

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That's our show, Small is in tomorrow…possibly, I'll be back next week.

Have a good one, and always be a fan.

-dary!