Contemplating CHIKARA 11.01.09: Better Late Than Never

Posted by Kevin Ford on 11.01.2009

In this diet-sized version, I discuss in detail my live thoughts on CHIKARA's "Cibernetico Increible"

Two weekends ago I once again headed to South Philadelphia for CHIKARA. My last CHIKARA show was back in March for the epic King of Trios weekend. I knew I wanted to go to one more show before the season closed. With the season finale falling on the weekend of Survivor Series (which I'll be attending in November), I decided I'd want to go the second to last Philadelphia show. The decision was easy when they announced that on October 18th, the 6th annual Torneo Cibernetico would take place. It was with great anticipation that I waited to see what the teams for this years Cibernetico would be.

I admit, I was a bit disappointed when CHIKARA announced that this years Cibernetico would be Increíbles style. For those who don't know, and Increíbles match is a match that pairs normal partners against one another. Hawk vs. Animal, Scott Steiner vs. Rick Steiner, matches like that. CHIKARA utilized this feature with four of the twelve Young Lions Cup first round matches back in August. It worked well, effectively breaking up the duo of The Sea Donsters and growing tension between The Super Smash Bros. However, I was apprehensive to see if CHIKARA could pull off eight teams splitting up into two squads.

My apprehensiveness was put to rest when I reminded myself of my own personal motto: If I have learned anything from CHIKARA, it's that everything happens for a reason. CHIKARA must have a reason for putting this Cibernetico together aside from "Teams opposing each other! Fun!" That would turn out to be the case, with some interesting twists and turns along the way. But we'll get there eventually.

After getting what I wanted from the merchandise tables, I found my seat (I love how CHIKARA has padded seats for the front row, by the way. Worth the extra $5 alone) and was lucky enough that my buddies Jason Sterlacci (of Pro Wrestling Ponderings) and Bryan Hughes (of internet radio show Topé con Coolio) sat behind me and were wildly entertaining with their comments. I mean, who am I to not bask in the glory of Jason Sterlacci singing and dancing the entire song "Mr. Roboto" by Styx while wearing an Ice Cream Jr. mask?

Speaking of Los Ice Creams, they opened the show with the new team of The Throwbacks, consisting of the old timey baseball player Dasher Hatfield and the young, hip basketball shootin' Sugar Dunkerton. Originally, the Throwbacks were supposed to face The Badd Boys of Brad and Chad Badd. Sadly, the Badd Boys were apprehended at the Canadian border and were unable to make it. Luckily, Los Ice Creams happened to be in town from Mexicali (though they really should be from Coney Island) to replace them. This was a fun tag match designed to show off the new guy in town (Sugar Dunkerton). As you'd expect, there was lots of comedy and fun to the match. However, neither team took each other lightly, as many unexpected hard shots flew through the match. Sugar impressed the fans, winning them over with his basketball based offense. The Throwbacks won with the "Grand Slam Dunk", which entails Dasher hitting a slam from the top rope and Sugar following up with a Randy Savage style elbow drop from the top rope. The Throwbacks picked up their first point, and celebrated by Sugar tossing air baseballs for Dasher to hit. The fans fell in love with The Throwbacks instantly, and furthered my case for why Create-A-Wrestler's contest needs to end with Dasher Hatfield.

The next match was Big Japan Wrestling member Ryuichi Kawakami making his United States debut (he competed in one of the CHIKARA Japan shows back in June). Eddie Kingston was originally supposed to be his opponent, but thanks to a broken nose (thanks for that one Sami Callihan), Vin Gerard replaced him. Vin as a replacement for Eddie Kingston…look, I like Vin, but this did not work. There styles were completely different and the fans were unusually quiet for this one. Kawakami didn't get a chance to do anything impressive, which I don't necessarily blame him for. Obviously they picked Kingston as he opponent for a reason. Unfortunately it didn't pan out and he was put in with the wildcard (Vin hopefully didn't cut anyone's breaks). Needless to say, this was dull, and thankfully short. I felt bad that Ryuichi had to take that awfully long plane ride for this.

Thankfully, the next match featuring Japanese stars was better. CHIKARA regular Sara Del Rey teamed up with La Malcriada (last seen in CHIKARA at King of Trios 2007) to take on another CHIKARA regular in Daizee Haze who was taking on the debuting Bullfight Sora. Sora, as you'd guess, has a cow gimmick. Jason Sterlacci busted out his rolodex of cow puns for this and they were all so bad they were funny. The story came in with Sora using her horns and ramming them into Del Rey's posterior. Del Rey got angrier with each passing ram. Near the end, Sara began annihilating Bullfight Sora. Del Rey would hit a big move, pin her for two, and pick her up by the horns before the referee could count to three. After doing this two or three teams, the referee called for the bell due to CHIKARA's "Excesivo Castigo" rule. This rule states that a participant can be disqualified if it becomes apparent that they are doing harm to their opponent with no intention on winning the match. With the way of Sara abusing Sora, it was obvious that was the case here. Sara stopped the beating with Daizee asking her what the heck she was doing. I liked the finish here, because let's face it, whoever won this match was inconsequential. It's nice for wrestling companies to refresh the fans on oft-forgotten rules every once in awhile. Here it worked well, getting over Sara as an ass-kicker. After watching "Hiding in Plain Sight", I stated that Sara could go toe to toe with any male competitor and be completely credible. After seeing this match, I feel even stronger about this statement.

Next up was a match I was anticipating: Claudio Castagnoli vs. Sal Rinauro. I know what you're thinking: Why? Why on Earth would I be excited for a match involving SAL FLIPPIN' RINAURO? I'll tell you why. The night before, I read that Mike Quackenbush defeated Sal Rinauro with a headlock. You read that right. A headlock. That is awesome. I was expecting this to be a complete goof fest, and that's what we got. A fan yelled at Sal to keep his shirt on. Sal paused, looked at him, mouthed "Son of a B-" and kept going. He did eventually take his shirt off, so sorry to that fan for not getting their way. There were gags about Sal being small and Claudio being huge, leading to a spot where Sal used money as incentive for referee Bryce Remsburg could bend over and place Sal on his shoulders for a test of strength. Sal would attempt Claudio's Giant Swing to no avail. Unamused, Claudio reversed and gave Sal the Giant Swing instead. Sal slapped his stomach to tap out making it (I believe) the first time anyone has tapped out to Claudio's Giant Swing. I'll be the first to admit I rolled my eyes and smacked my forehead when Sal Rinauro was announced on these shows. However, he came in and worked hard and had two goofy matches that the fans (at least in attendance) enjoyed. I would certainly not mind seeing him again in CHIKARA. Sal vs. Hydra? Yes please.

Then we had the seventh mystery match. Louden announced this as a six-man tag. F.I.S.T. came out, followed by the Order of the Neo-Solar Temple. At this point, the fans assumed Louden made a mistake and meant it was an eight-man tag. Then The UnStable of STIGMA and Colin Delaney came out, and everyone was confused. As it turns out, we were going to get another Increíbles match between two Rudo squadrons. The teams split up with Icarus, Crossbones, and Colin Delaney on one side and Chuck Taylor, Ultramantis Black, and STIGMA on the other. They did a tease of teams facing each other leading to Mantis and Crossbones coming in. Crossbones did his best to get back on Mantis' good side, and laid down for his overlord. Referee Nick Papagorgio refused to make the count, and we got a match that was by-the-numbers. There wasn't anything actively bad, but it wasn't all that special either. The point of this story came when the lights went out and the guys in all white that have been tormenting Ultramantis Black for months appeared on the screen. The lights came back on, and TWO men dressed in all white appeared in the audience. Ultramantis Black screamed as only he can, and ran to the back abandoning his team. Meanwhile, Icarus scored the pinfall on STIGMA to win the match for his team. It's interesting to note that Vin Gerard went 2-0 this weekend and STIGMA went 0-2, so you must wonder just what is going on with The UnStable. I'm very intrigued where this Eye of Tyr angle is leading, and CHIKARA has my full attention.

Our semi-main event was a tag match between The Roughnecks of Brodie Lee and Grizzly Redwood taking on the Osirian Portal of Amasis and Ophidian. This was interesting, as the Osirian Portal had lost the Campeonatos de Parejas a month earlier to the Colony but had regained two of the three points needed to gain a title shot. If The Portal were to beat the Roughnecks, they'd get that shot. The Roughnecks on the other hand had a shot at The Colony for the Campones de Parejas the night before and lost, thanks to Fire Ant pinning Grizzly Redwood two straight falls in a row. Brodie, was not happy. Brodie was not happy at the result as it was the newly-Tecnico Portal who won the bout. The Portal came out in fancy new gear, with blue coloring where black used to be. They slapped hands with the fans, Brodie killed Amasis till he made the hot tag to Ophidian…it was quite the change. Thankfully, the wrestling was just as good and this was the best Grizzly Redwood has looked in CHIKARA (granted, I have not seen his and Brodie's match with The Colony). Brodie did what Eddie Kingston did to Grizzly in Nashua; took advantage of the situation without Grizzly's help. Grizzly blind tagged himself in and got nailed with The Osirian Sacrament. An annoyed Brodie booted Grizzly's face off, and Grizzly lay in the ring during nearly the entire intermission. Grizzly's picture went black and white days before it was completely removed from the CHIKARA roster page. As sad as it seems to be, Grizzly Redwood is done with CHIKARA.

Then we had the Torneo Cibernetico itself. I don't know how much detail there is to go into in terms of moves and such, but needless to say it was an awesome spectacle of Lucha Libre, innovation, and high-flying. As I said, many of the pinfalls led to something else down the line. First, Player Dos pinned his partner Player Uno with the frog splash. It could be argued that Uno kicked out at two, but the referee said otherwise and he was out. This makes it three times in three months that Player Dos has pinned Player Uno. Dos is by himself in singles matches at both of the Season finale shows, which could mean something. As of print time, Player Uno does not have any match. Speaking of Player Dos, Lince Dorado ended up pinning him and Jigsaw back to back. This is where I feared that Lince was winning the whole shebang. After all, he pinned the current Young Lions Cup champion and the 2004 Cibernetico winner back-to-back. Thankfully it has only led to Lince Dorado getting a shot at the Cup in Philadelphia at "Three-Fisted Tales". The crowd was not pleased with these falls, and Jason Sterlacci actually received a middle finger from Lince due to his heckling. Naughty Lince, you know what promotion you're in! Hallowicked also gained a measure of revenge by pinning Helios after a Super Fisherman's Buster. Helios pinned Hallowicked in a singles match the night before. Fire Ant became everyone's favorite wrestler when he pinned Lince Dorado and sent him home. This left Mike Quackenbush, Hallowicked, Carpenter Ant, and team captain Soldier Ant left. Soldier Ant took out Hallowicked with an STO, and then Quackenbush with the Skayde Schoolboy (kind of a low-blow considering Skayde trained Quackenbush). This left Carpenter Ant and Soldier Ant left. With Soldier Ant pinning two of CHIKARA's finest in a row it would be a piece of cake to take out someone who hasn't been in the company for half a year, let alone had enough matches to fill one hand. You'd be wrong however, as Carpenter Ant stunned the crowd by forcing Soldier Ant to tap out to a Reverse CHIKARA Special. The audience stood and applauded as Carpenter Ant raised his hand in victory.

Two weeks later, I still don't know what to make of this. Carpenter Ant?! Were I to make a list of all sixteen participants and ranked them in order of where I expected them to win, Carpenter Ant would be thirteenth with Green Ant and The Young Bucks behind him. Carpenter Ant also pinned rookie sensation Frightmare, which also sends some sort of message to the fans.

The fact that I can't figure out what's up with Carpenter Ant and that I can't wait to see where it's going is a huge positive. It's the kind of storyline that intrigues you to the point that you are willing to follow the message boards, blogs, and most importantly, buy DVD's and tickets to see just where they're heading. The Carpenter Ant story, the Eye of Tyr (both stories could be intertwined), and the new teams of the Badd Boys and The Throwbacks make the future of CHIKARA bright.

This was a very enjoyable show. Considering how big of a CHIKARA fan I am, it stinks that I have to go out of my way to attend live shows. I can say without hesitation that the strenuous trip was absolutely worth it and I anticipate the next time I'll be able to see a live show. If you have the means, I highly suggest doing so.

New CHIKARA DVD's


By the time you're reading this wonderful piece of writing, both of CHIKARA's October events will be available for you to purchase at Smart Mark Video. Both shows are loaded with great matches, with one of them of course being the one I just reviewed! For those of you who want non-spoiler cards, here you are:

"An Optimistic View of a Pessimistic World"
Campeonatos de Parejas: The Colony (Fire Ant & Soldier Ant) vs. The Roughnecks (Brodie Lee & Grizzly Redwood)
Young Lions Cup: Player Dos vs. Frightmare
NWA Jr. Heavyweight Championship: Mike Quackenbush vs. Sal Rinauro
Elimination Match: The Osirian Portal (Amasis & Ophidian) vs. The Throwbacks (Dasher Hatfield & Sugar Dunkerton) vs. F.I.S.T. (Icarus & Gran Akuma) vs. The Young Bucks (Nick & Matt Jackson)
Claudio Castagnoli vs. Player Uno
Helios vs. Hallowicked
Jigsaw vs. STIGMA
The Colony (Green Ant & Carpenter Ant) vs. The Order of the Neo-Solar Temple (Ultramantis Black & Crossbones)
Vin Gerard vs. Lince Dorado

Cibernetico Increíble
Torneo Cibernetico: Mike Quackenbush, Hallowicked, Player Uno, Matt Jackson, Carpenter Ant, Lince Dorado, Cheech Hernandez, & Soldier Ant vs. Fire Ant, Jigsaw, Nick Jackson, Player Dos, KC "Cloudy" Day, Frightmare, Green Ant, & Helios
The Osirian Portal (Amasis & Ophidian) vs. The Roughnecks (Brodie Lee & Grizzly Redwood)
Icarus, Crossbones, & Colin Delaney vs. Chuck Taylor, Ultramantis Black, & STIGMA
Claudio Castagnoli vs. Sal Rinauro
Sara Del Ray & La Malcriada vs. Daizee Haze & Bullfight Sora
Ryuichi Kawakami vs. Vin Gerard
The Throwbacks (Dasher Hatfield & Sugar Dunkerton) vs. Los Ice Creams (El Hijo del Ice Cream & Ice Cream Jr.)

YouTube Fun!



Here we have the 185th episode of CHIKARA's Podcast-A-Go-Go, where clips from the show "Behind The 8 Ball"are shown. Matches covered are The Colony (Fire Ant & Soldier Ant) vs. F.I.S.T. (Icarus & Chuck Taylor) and Gran Akuma vs. Shadow Phoenix. Be sure to check out my review of the show, by clicking the show name in a sentence or two above!



Unsure of whether to buy "Hiding In Plain Sight"? Watch this trailer to get a better look at this great show.


Shillville



If you have not begun listening, Mike Quackenbush and Clayton Morris (of FOX News & Friends) host a pop-culture podcast known as The Grizzly Bear Egg Cafe. Clayton and Mike talk about all things geek such as movies, music, television, comic books, tech stuff, and wrestling here and there. I find it wildly entertaining, as Clayton and Mike play off each other very well. It's also really cool to hear Mike talk about non-wrestling stuff as well. So please, check out The Grizzly Bear Egg Cafe and subscribe to their podcast on iTunes.

Hey, I have a blog now! I post all my wrestling writings there (outside of this column), so check it out! I have a review of AAW's "Us vs. Them" show featuring Bryan Danielson, Jigsaw, Gran Akuma, Hallowicked, Arik Cannon, The North Star Express, Jimmy Jacobs, and others. Plus, the two newest CHIKARA DVD's are up for review as well (and on 411 of course). Click here to check out the review and everything else on my blog.

Ari Berenstein is awesome. So is his column. Go read it, right now.

So are Brad Garoon and Jake Ziegler! Both of them have their own respective blogs you should check out. Brad's blog, Open The Garoon Gate, is all about Dragon Gate and Dragon Gate USA. He reviews every Infinity, PPV, etc. Jake Ziegler's blog, Kayfabe, has WWE, TNA, and ROH reviews. Make sure to check out and enjoy both!

Speaking of Brad and Jake, both of them joined myself and Sam Berman for the second episode of the Cool Kids Table Redux podcast at Pro Wrestling Ponderings. In the podcast, we have an immodest reponse to a writing Aaron Glazer did. In addition to that, myself, Jason Sterlacci, and Jerome Cusson have a podcast discussing CHIKARA, TNA, Charlton Heston writing the bible, and so much more. Both of those podcasts can be found on the front page of Pro Wrestling Ponderings.

Thanks so much again everyone for checking out this weeks Contemplating CHIKARA! My apologies for the abridged version of the column, but next week I'll be back talking the Season Finale shows so far, some DGUSA thoughts, and more. I love reading feedback and e-mails so keep em' coming. Thanks so much again for reading, and I hope you all have a fun, safe Halloween!

Links!
The CHIKARA Home Page .
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Follow CHIKARA Fans on Twitter!.
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Dragon Gate USA Home Page
Follow Dragon Gate USA on Facebook!.
Follow Dragon Gate USA on Twitter!.
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