The 2009 411 Year End Wrestling Awards (Part 3)

Welcome to Part 3 of the 411Mania.com 2009 Year End Wrestling Awards. If you haven’t already, be sure to check out Part 1 and Part 2!

REVIEW: Before we get to it, let’s take a look at the winners we’ve already announced to this point:

Announcer of the Year: Matt Striker (WWE)

Rookie of the Year: Frightmare (CHIKARA)

Breakout of the Year: Kofi Kingston (WWE)

Comeback Wrestler of the Year: Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat (WWE)

Disappointment of the Year: The Overall Lackluster Wrestlemania XXV(WWE)

Best Indy Show of the Year: PWG Threemendous III

Free TV Match of the Year: Rey Mysterio vs. John Morrison (WWE Smackdown: 9.4.09)

Story/Surprise of the Year: Shane McMahon resigns from the WWE. (WWE)

Worst Story/Surprise of the Year: Mitsuhara Misawa dies in the ring. (NOAH)

Feud/Storyline of the Year: CM Punk vs. Jeff Hardy (WWE)

Worst Feud/Storyline of the Year: Hornswoggle vs. Chavo Guerrero (WWE)

Worst Fed of the Year: Total Nonstop Action

Worst Promo of the Year: The Debut of the Abraham Washington Show (WWE ECW: 6.30.09)

And now that we have that out of the way…

2009 411 YEAR END WRESTLING AWARDS! (Part 3)

WORST PAY-PER-VIEW OF THE YEAR

Honorable Mentions:
TNA Against All Odds – 7 Points
WWE Bragging Rights – 4 Points
WWE Breaking Point – 5 Points

3rd Place: WWE Hell in a Cell (10.4.09) – 12 points

2nd Place: TNA Destination X (3.15.09) – 30 points

And your winner is…:

TNA Victory Road (7.19.09) – 54 points

Larry Csonka: And the worst PPV of the year goes to TNA Victory Road. The funny thing is that the “booking”, as far as who went over wasn’t bad. Sure they did the MEM clean sweep early on, but the winning the titles idea is fine with me, because in THEORY, AJ, Beer Money and such come back strong and win back the gold. Solid idea, but the fact was the execution was horrible for a lot of the show and that has been THE ANGLE forever, and instead of some payoff, the originals/frontline/job guys keep losing and being made to look stupid. Average and uninspired matches were the theme of the card, I mean, when Foley and Angle have the best match of the show, with an injured Angle and a broken down and out of shape Foley WITHOUT the aid of the smoke and mirrors, well, that is kind of sad really. The opening title change screams title switches for the sake of title switches. The Slick Johnson angle isn’t needed when we have so many women in the division now. Morgan continues to disappoint, and when you have a bland match with Daniels, there are issues. The Abyss match was what it was, not great, not bad. IWGP tag titles were too much of a giveaway, Jenna and Sharmell made me hate wrestling, AJ and Nash tried, but the ref shit gets old and continued to get old in the TNA tag title match. Joe vs. Sting started hot, fell down, Taz came out to no reaction, Sting fucked the ending and it was what it was. The main event finish pissed me off, since we had already seen the bullshit with the ref, but it was a good pro wrestling match, and considering all of the limitations they had, I was fine with it. In the end, average and uninspired matches, predictable booking and too much bullshit killed the crowd, no one cared, and they had every right too. When the Orlando audience doesn’t pop for the normal stuff, (BEER, MONEY) TNA is doing something wrong. The worst part is that they will be doing more Orlando PPV’s to cut costs. By the time Taz came out, they had given up. And overall, this was the worst PPV of the year and possibly TNA’s worst 3-hour PPV ever.

Joseph F. Martinez: This is one of the few TNA pay-per-views I actually caught in 2009 and I wished I hadn’t. It didn’t help the negative image I have of the company. The night started off with a pretty boring women’s title match between Tara and Angelina Love and didn’t go far from there. A few matches after the opener was what had to be one of the worst matches of the year. A bout between Sharmell and Jenna Morasca. The deal went on for six or seven minutes and that was six or seven minutes too long. Taz debuted on this show and I had to go to Youtube to see it and refreshen my memory of it. Pretty bland. The main event (a title match between Kurt Angle and Mick Foley) was okay but overall, the show ranged from awful to mediocre. TNA cleaned itself up pretty well and rebounded in terms of quality but this show was historically bad.

Jeremy Thomas: You know, the saddest part about Victory Road is that I actually had some hopes for it. On paper, it wasn’t a terrible show outside of the Sharmell/Jenna match which everyone knew was going to suck. Foley vs. Angle had potential, Stevie vs. Abyss did as well and I was actually excited to see what happened between the British Invasion and Team 3D. Well, what did we get folks? Quality…naah, no need for that. Why would you want to have Stevie and Abyss put on a great brawl when you have the opportunity to stuff a smoke machine inside a taser and make Stevie give a stupid “I’m being shocked” expression? Why make anything involving Taz’s debut with the company mean a damn thing when you can have him walk out to no crowd reaction? Why try to book around the limitations of Jenna and Sharmell when you can drape a movement-limited dress on the one trained wrestler out of the two and make the other one act like such a whore that it makes the Red Light District in Amsterdam look romantic by comparison? This was a terrible Pay-Per-View from top to bottom and as much as most of the talent tried to work around the limitations they had (injury, booking or bad talent), they failed. I said this in the 411 Pay-Per-View Roundtable regarding the Knockouts Title match: “This is simple. Tara just won and having her lose this quickly would be just superhumanly dumb.” Ladies and gentlemen, the last two words of that statement applies to Victory Road in its entirety.

WORST MATCH OF THE YEAR

Honorable Mentions:
Hornswoggle vs. Chavo Guerrero in a Texas Bullrope Match (WWE Raw: 8.31.09) – 11 Points
Jillian Hall vs. Melina for the WWE Divas Championship (WWE Raw: 10.12.09) – 10 Points
Ms. Wrestlemania Battle Royal (WWE Wrestlemania XXV: 4.5.09) – 9 Points

3rd Place: John Cena vs. The Big Show in a Submission Match (WWE Extreme Rules, 6.7.09) – 17 points

2nd Place: Vickie Guerrero & Chavo Guerrero vs. Santina Marella in a Handicap Hog Pen Match (WWE Extreme Rules, 6.7.09) – 20 points

And your winner is…:

Sharmell vs. Jenna Morasca (TNA Victory Road, 7.19.09) – 50 points

Len Archibald: God. Have you seen that fake trailer for Grindhouse called Don’t? In it, there is a brief shot where a character plucks his own eyes out. Sadly to say, because I’m not as tough as I would like to be, I didn’t do that during this match, but I was oh so close. This was…I don’t know what this was. It was two non-wrestlers trying to grapple in a serious manner – the same way where I would try to be a serious gymnast going on the pommel-horse to show how “serious” I was about doing it. I would fail in epic and spectacular fashion, but dammit, I’d show how “serious” I am. I think this tied, if not broke the “botch per second” record set by Jackie Gayda. Just not one of the worse of the year – but of all time. I hope they’re proud (especially since they’re both now unemployed in the biz.)

Larry Csonka: This, this…this almost defies words it was so bad. I mean, we’re not talking about a bad women’s match here, we are talking possibly the worst match in TNA history, and that includes the Johnson’s and the midgets early on. First of all, they were too concerned with Sharmell’s gimmick to have her wear ring gear, she wore this dress, an evening gown that was shedding the whole time and limited her movement. She does have experience, let her wear something she can move in, don’t limit her in a match that was already going to be bad. Second of all, Jenna acted like a complete whore, and not in the awesome Beautiful People kind of way. Thirdly, she apparently either didn’t pick shit up OR was given next to NO wrestling training. Bad punches and slaps happen, but she couldn’t run the ropes, didn’t know how to bump properly, which you learn the FIRST DAY, and constantly looked lost in there. They proceeded to have SIX of the worst minutes ever caught on PPV, and when it was all said and done, I don’t know what offended me more, the shittiness of the match or the fact that TNA put her on PPV with such a lack of training that I considered it dangerous. This shit was just horrendous. If you can believe it, this was way worse than I could have imagined.

Jasper Gerretsen: Unfortunately there are many contenders here, most of which involve Hornswoggle. The reason that I’m writing about this match in stead of any of the Hornswoggle matches is for one simple reason: This match was on pay per view, meaning that fans had to pay money to see it. The angle that lead up to this match was, for TNA standards at least, not too terible, but the match itself was every bit as bad as could be expected from a match involving two women who barely had any wrestling experience at all. The only saving grace this match had was seeing Jenna Moresca being stupid enough to slap Awesome Kong. Of course, with Kong being Kong, the bitch got killed dead.

Ari Berenstein: For those that are dare curious (and have no need of their eyes for the remainder of their lives), the match in question is available here. Just put it on mute because the commentary the guy dubs over the match may be EVEN WORSE than the match itself. That’s saying something. Consider yourself warned.

Now then, there is no way you could possibly enjoy this match unless you are some sort of perverse wrestling masochist. You had Jenna Morasca, so totally out of her depth and with little to no wrestling training to her credit (and little just went and told Hornswoggle he was short). You had Sharmell, whose previous wrestling experience has been that she is married to a wrestler and had Kurt Angle tell her he wanted to have bestiality sex with her as part of an angle. Now, imagine for a second that you are in charge of the TNA booking committee. Do you:

A) Program these two inexperienced women into your most important heel stable, book a month-long feud based on them not liking each other, thus splintering said group and distracting the wrestlers and the viewers from the more important aspects of your major storyline, then put them on a Pay Per View match, give them ten minutes, slap them on the back and tell them “Good Luck”.
B) Make one of them wear a dress that is way too long and inappropriate (and downright dangerous) to wear when wrestling and have the other one put on an outfit that most hookers would think was giving away too much before payment.
C) Use two more experienced (read: WILL NOT TRIP AND KILL THEMSELVES ON THE WAY TO THE RING) wrestlers as outside presence and have them bump and put over the other girls in the ring, thus killing their presence. P.S. Have one of these wrestlers be AWESOME KONG.
D) ALL OF THE FREAKING ABOVE!

If your answer is D, then come on down to Florida! You my friend, are heir apparent.

WORST MANAGER OF THE YEAR

Honorable Mentions:
Sharmell (TNA) – 3 Points
Taz (TNA) – 8 Points
Tony Atlas (WWE) – 3 Points

3rd Place: Rosa Mendes (WWE) – 9 points

2nd Place: Vickie Guerrero (WWE) – 12 points

And your winner is…:

Jenna Morasca (TNA) – 42 points

Aaron Hubbard: I’ll confess, I wasn’t watching TNA during the short time that Jenna Morasca was around. However, let’s just say this: anytime a celebrity is brought in for more than one show, it’s going to suck. For every Floyd Mayweather, Mr. T, and Lawrence Taylor, there are dozens of celebrities that should have never set foot in a wrestling ring. As part of my research blurb, I watched Morasca vs. Sharmell. I tell you, I still haven’t recovered. That match is negative a billion stars. And I’m sorry, financial backer to the Main Event Mafia? Financial backer? To Sting, Kurt Angle, Kevin Nash and Scott Steiner? REALLY? Jenna Morasca was an embarrassment to wrestling and deserves every negative award she gets.

Mathew Sforcina: Jenna’s in-ring work will be discussed elsewhere, so let’s just for now focus on her work outside the ring. And, uh, what can you say? Totally unmemorable, totally illogical, she was there because she was a ‘star’ outside of wrestling, and thus took time away from people who might be able to use it to get over and stuff. But forget that, she was in Survivor! Push her! A bad performer, systematic of the problems TNA has had. Thus, she gets this award.

Jeremy Thomas: It’s almost unfair to pick on Jenna as much as this year’s awards have. How can one woman cause so much scorn? Well, it’s not difficult to realize how this could happen when you look at Miss Morasca’s work in TNA over 2009. One has to wonder how much mainstream attention they’d really get by hiring the woman who won Survivor six years ago, but nonetheless Jenna was brought in to be the “financial backer” for the Main Event Mafia. While the concept was solid considering Morasca’s two separate million dollar bounties—for Survivor and her Playboy spread—the problem inherent in this is that it required wrestling fans to be familiar with the reality show world, which many are not. She proceeded to manage Kevin Nash and become one of the ineffective managers the industry has seen in quite some time. Vickie Guerrero sucked as a manager, but at least she had a character—even if that character was just being a shrill, annoying bitch. Jenna had no personality to speak of and even less charisma. Most of her managerial tenure was spent cat-fighting with Sharmell, which led to other, even worse things than her managerial role. I will never understand what people see in Jenna, as she not only worked for TNA for far too long (even if it was short), she was hired to play opposite TNA star Kurt Angle in one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen, End Game. Amazingly, she showed even less charisma there but this takes nothing away from her shockingly awful work as a professional wrestling manager, a job completely worthy of Worst Manager of the Year.

WORST TAG TEAM OF THE YEAR

Honorable Mentions:
Alex Payne & Grizzly Redwood (ROH) – 8 Points
The Beautiful People: Lacey Von Erich, Velvet Sky, & Madison Rayne (TNA) – 8 Points
The Bella Twins (WWE) – 16 Points

3rd Place: Team 3D (TNA) – 18 points

2nd Place: Booker T and Scott Steiner (TNA) – 22 points

And your winner is…:

Ezekiel Jackson and Vladimir Kozlov (WWE) – 26 points

Ryan Byers: In some ways, I feel bad trashing the Jackson and Kozlov team, because it’s not their fault that they are as bad as they are. They’re as bad as they are because they, like many wrestlers over the past five or so years, got pulled out of WWE’s developmental system LONG before they were ready to appear on national television. Fortunately, the company realized that neither of them were ready for sustained pushes as singles wrestlers, as they never gave one to Ezekiel and pulled the rug out from under Kozlov’s push towards the top of the promotion’s cards, placing them both on ECW, presumably to gain the seasoning that they did not have when they were first made a part of the main WWE roster. However, in a bit of a confusing move, the ‘E bucked conventional booking wisdom and put the two extreme greenhorns TOGETHER into a tag team. For many, many years in wrestling, standard operating procedure would be to take a larger, less competent wrestler and pair him with a smaller veteran in order to allow him to learn the ropes. Hell, one of WWE’s biggest stars, Dave Batista, credits this type of pairing with Ric Flair as being one of the biggest factors in preparing him to be a major wrestling star. However, for whatever reason, the powers that be in the company were determined to make Big Zeke and Bad Vlad into partners, albeit under the watchful eye of William Regal. Even Regal’s guidance couldn’t do all that much for these two, though, as they were largely left to awkwardly squash tandems of jobbers or stuck fighting Tommy Dreamer, Goldust, or other wrestlers who were not equipped to make up for their shortcomings. Now, as 2010 dawns, it looks like we’re heading into a feud between Jackson and Kozlov. Could we see that rivalry take top honors in the 411’s 2010 Year End Awards for Worst Storyline? If it’s anywhere as bad as the tag team matches that these two competed in during 2009, it could be an early contender…

Aaron Hubbard: I’m sure somewhere in Vince McMahon’s mind it makes sense to pair up two big guys with no promo skills, no drawing power, and questionable in-ring skills together to run roughshod over smaller guys and kill any chance of a tag team division developing. It must make sense somehow. After all, we’ve seen The Harris Twins, Test and Albert, and Nathan Jones and a green Matt Morgon before. But hey, at least this team had some color. Some call them “Regal’s Roundtable” and some even call them “Ebony and Ivory”. I call them two generic big guys that most people will forget about by 2012. At least I can only hope. Without a doubt in my mind, this is the worst tag team of the year.

Chad Nevett: This duo was such a disappointment, because their move to ECW seemed like a step forward. Both men had potential, but needed some honing and practice, making ECW the right place for them. Teaming together under the leadership of William Regal seemed like another step in the right direction for both men. And, then, nothing happened. They weren’t dominant, they didn’t improve in the ring, they didn’t get over. This is partly a booking problem, but given the lack of improvement in-ring from either man, I don’t blame creative for not wanting to push them. The potential to be a dominant tag team in the WWE was there and they didn’t realize any of that potential. Other tag teams were worse this year in different areas, but none were so utterly disappointing overall.

Mathew Sforcina: OK, I’ll admit this: I mark a bit for Big Zeke. Not a lot, but I like him. Suffice to say, he’s clearly still green, and putting him in there with Kozlov, who’s terrible at most things and the stuff he’s good at is no longer in vogue (had he been around 20 years ago, he and Hogan would have drew gangbusters), on a show with NO tag teams at all, that’s not good. Even with Regal there, this was just not working at all, in getting them over, making them better, nothing. But hey, could be worse. They could have been on Smackdown or Raw, and getting really pushed…

WORST WOMEN’S WRESTLER OF THE YEAR

Honorable Mentions:
Melina (WWE) – 6 Points
Vickie Guerrero (WWE) – 9 Points

3rd Place: Rosa Mendes (WWE) – 23 points

2nd Place: Lacey Von Erich (TNA) – 25 points

And your winner is…:

Jenna Morasca (TNA) – 46 points

Ari Berenstein: Poor Jenna, you know I don’t half blame her for this award, because TNA threw a whole bunch of money at her and you have to think she didn’t quite know what she was getting herself into when she signed the contract. Not only that, but it was TNA and their booking that pushed her into the match against Sharmell. Yet in one match she proved that it takes more than a few weeks of training to be anything but a greenhorn trainee. She was sent out there to fail in the ring, without even the knowledge of how to run the ring ropes in a straight line. She was made to wrestle in a ridiculous costume, inhibiting her movements even more. She resorted to stripper moves and tried not to fall down and kill herself on the way to the closing bell. I voted her vs. Sharmell for worst women’s match of the year and I think that’s appropriate. It was an atrocity on the level of the infamous Jackie Gayda match. Yet, does she deserve worst women’s wrestler of the year for that one match? Clearly the 411 staff as a whole voted enough for her to receive it. However, I’d ask everyone to consider Melina—a woman with years more experience, but who may have been every bit as horrible as Jenna this year. She botched moves almost every match, even when it was the only move she had to do. All that and her involvement in some of the worst divas angles and skits of the year (such as her fawning promos trying to protect Maria from being hurt by Dolph Ziggler and feuding with Michelle McCool in which she looked like the heel instead). I think the real winner is clear, but Jenna Morasca is a victim of circumstance (and her own greed and hubris) which she unfortunately saw through to the very end. She never had a chance—this award was all but a fait accompli the moment she ass-shaked her way into the six-sided ring.

Ryan Byers: Since its inception, TNA’s Knockouts division has been considered far and away superior to WWE’s Divas division. However, 2009 has been the year that the Knockouts have nosedived, and, even though TNA’s women’s matches may still on average be better than those in WWE, there was some utter crap produced by the Knockoutsthis year. If you want proof of that, look no further than Jenna Morasca, who, in many ways, is the female version of Adam “Pac-Man” Jones. In 2007, TNA signed NFL player Pac-Man to a big money contract, thinking that his mainstream celebrity would bring them big attention despite the fact that nobody aside from hardcore football fans knew who he was. In 2009, TNA signed former Survivor contestant Morasca to a big money contract, thinking that her mainstream celebrity would bring them attention despite the fact that nobody aside from hardcore reality television fans knew who she was. In 2007, TNA placed Pac-Man at the forefront of a major angle, pairing him with Ron “The Truth” Killings and giving him the promotion’s Tag Team Titles. In 2009, TNA placed Morasca at the forefront of a major angle, making her a valet of the promotion’s top heel faction, the Main Event Mafia. In 2007, Pac-Man proved to be a serious disappointment, with whatever mainstream attention he garnered not resulting in any change to the bottom line of TNA’s business and participating in some of the worst matches and segments in the promotion’s history. In 2009, Morasca served to be a serious disappointment, with whatever mainstream attention she garnered not resulting in any change to the bottom line of TNA’s business and participating in some of the worst matches and segments in the promotion’s history. In 2007, Pac-Man won virtually every “worst of” award that he was eligible for in 411’s Year End Awards, taking home Worst Tag Team of the Year and Worst Wrestler of the Year. In 2009, Morasca has won virtually every “worst of” award that she is eligible for in 411’s Year End Awards, taking home Worst Match of the Year, Worst Manager of the Year, and Worst Women’s Wrestler of the Year. Not surprisingly (but fortunately), Jenna has made a hasty retreat from the professional wrestling industry, leaving herself as a godawful footnote in TNA’s history as opposed to a blemish on the profession that we will be dealing with for years to come.

Steve Cook: Honestly, it’s tough to blame Jenna for winning this award. Out of all the female wrestlers I’ve seen compete this year, she had the least amount of experience, had the least amount of training, and had the least idea of what makes a good wrestling match. (Yes, I rank Maria Menunous’ level of training above Jenna’s.) I blame whoever in TNA Creative thought it was a good idea to pair Jenna up with Sharmell T, who’s never been a particularly good wrestler herself, and put them in a one on one match on live pay per view television, where they didn’t have the luxury of editing. When WWE put Maria in the ring with no real experience outside of a little training, at least they were smart enough to put her in a multi-woman match with people who knew what they were doing and could make her look competent. TNA did no such thing here, leaving Jenna & Sharmell to die a horrible death in front of a pay per view audience. Undoubtedly, Jenna deserves this award, but if TNA had been smarter with how they used her it would have gone to somebody else.

mathew Sforcina: Jenna had one match. ONE match. And yet that match was so horrible, so insulting, so painful, that she wins this award despite Lacey Von Erich being right there. That shows just how horrible Jenna was in the ring. She seemingly had NO idea what to do in there, apart from ‘selling’ which was to just lie there dead, which made sense for the ending I suppose, but not anything else. This award is half to Jenna, and half to the company that put her there.

WORST WRESTLER OF THE YEAR

Honorable Mentions:
Jessie Neal (TNA) – 4 Points
Kevin Nash (TNA) – 11 Points
Santino Marella (WWE) – 10 Points
Tyler Reks (WWE) – 12 Points

3rd Place: Cody Deaner (TNA) – 14 points

2nd Place: The Great Khali (WWE) – 19 points

And your winner is…:

Hornswoggle (WWE) – 42 points

Jasper Gerretsen: The continuing employment of Hornswoggle is one great mystery. He was brought in as a prop for Finlay in 2006, but contrary to popular belief he actually is a wrestler. He was known as $hortstack, the world’s sexiest midget, and even held the X-division championship in an NWA promotion. When he first made his debut, I didn’t give him more than a few months, but somehow he is now entering his fourth year of employment, outlasting a whole number of other wrestlers. This year he was finally separated from Finlay by the draft, and again I expected him to be released in a matter of weeks. In stead, he was featured on RAW almost weekly, working comedy that ranged from mildly amusing to completely godawful with Santino Marella and Chavo Guerrero. That in itself wasn’t too bad, but he then moved on to an extended program with DX. The program with two main event wrestlers culminated in “little people’s court”, a series of segments that was about as disturbing as the tunnel scene in the original Charlie and the Chocolate Factory movie.

Joseph F. Martinez: One of my favorite wrestling moments of the decade was when JBL destroyed Hornswoggle. I thought that was going to be the end of the Little Bastard. Nope, he returned in 2009 to wreak more havoc on our television screens. Horny spent the majority of 2009 making Chavo Guerrero look stupid. It was a waste of television time but at least he wasn’t doing anything in the main event. Fast forward to the latter stages of the year and Degeneration X was actually elevating Hornswoggle to their level! The guy can’t wrestle, he can’t speak (kayfabe wise at least) and he’s a complete waste of time. There are guys like The Great Khali who are awful at wrestling but at least they’re big guys who look menacing. Hornswoggle is a waste of WWE TV time and the best candidate for worst wrestler of the year.

Stephen Randle: “But wait, he’s just a midget, he’s not a real wrestler!” sayeth the defenders. And while that may have been true when he debuted as Finlay’s sidekick, and while he may well be one of the most well-rounded midget wrestlers in history (because how the hell would I know if he is or isn’t), he’s not being treated as if his miniature size prevents him from competing with “regular” sized people. Indeed, for all of 2009 and even before that, Hornswoggle has been stepping into the ring in WWE-promoted and sanctioned contests against legitimate wrestlers in contests that, in large part, were intended to be real matches. By and large, these matches have sucked, and say what you will about Chavo Guerrero, he knows how to wrestle a decent match, so the fault can’t lie with him, or Natalya Neidhart, or Miz and Morrison, or any of the other dozen or so wrestlers that have faced off with the green-suited monster in the last year. And while Santino Marella has proved that comedy has its place in a wrestling match, that place is in throw-away seventh-quarter hour matches that mean nothing in the bigger picture, not as part of one of the main event storylines on WWE’s alleged flagship show. The ongoing wacky antics of Hornswoggle as he interacted with D-Generation X has overshadowed several PPV matches at this point, in the interest of “humorous” segments that culminated in the unfortunate “Little People’s Court” on the December 21st edition of Raw. The bottom line is, with a roster full of capable, deserving, and skilled wrestlers who could use the backing of the Creative team and have been hung out to dry instead, the fact that all this TV time, all this promotion, and all this effort has gone towards a man who couldn’t realisticalnly stand up to any member of the WWE roster, but has repeatedly been portrayed as able to do just that, is why Hornswoggle has to be the consensus choice for the Worst Wrestler of 2009.

Mathew Sforcina: Hornswoggle is over. That’s a fact we don’t like to discuss, but it’s true, to the kids who buy Cena shirts and DX glowsticks and Jeff Hardy armbands, Hornswoggle is funny and cool. But just because something is over, doesn’t mean you need to push it. If Hornswoggle was a manager, like he was to begin with, then he’d be bearable. Even if the guy he was managing was a main event guy, we could probably put up with him. But no, he got a winning streak. A feud with Chavo, a talented wrestler, where Horny won at every turn. THAT is why he gets this award, because something just barely tolerable got shoved down our throats. And there’s very little we like shoved down our throats, thank you very much.

FED OF THE YEAR

Honorable Mentions:
Pro Wrestling Guerilla – 16 Points
Ring of Honor – 13 Points
Total NonStop Action – 15 Points

3rd Place: CHIKARA – 18 points

2nd Place: Dragon Gate USA – 23 points

And your winner is…:

World Wrestling Entertainment – 33 points

Kevin Ford: The WWE has always been funny to me in terms of its reception from us internet fans. For the most part, it seems a lot of people just love to point on the negatives and always harp on what the WWE does. It’s rare to see people praising the things they do without pointing out and shining a light on the negatives. But then we people look back on the year as a whole, they seem to remember the positives and say “You know, the year wasn’t so bad.”

Don’t get me wrong, I disliked a lot in WWE this year. The Big Show/Edge/Vickie Guerrero storyline was atrocious, Big Show and Cena had some bad matches, and the Kane/Khali storyline was perplexing. Chavo vs. Hornswoggle may be one of the worst, most embarrassing feuds I’ve ever witnessed as a wrestling fan. But I must say that it’s been awhile since I’ve enjoyed WWE as much as I did for a certain while this year.

The Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels storyline was so well done and led to what I believe was the best match in 2009, when the two tore the house down and essentially salvaged an otherwise mediocre Wrestlemania. Chris Jericho and Rey Mysterio had three matches in the late Spring/early Summer that lit the WWE on fire and found many anti-WWE fans coming to watch the shows. CM Punk really stepped into his own and became the biggest heel in the company, with the perfect archrival in Jeff Hardy. These two feuds made Smackdown! the best wrestling show of the summer. Throw in guys like John Morrison, Shelton Benjamin, and Edge (for a bit anyways), and you have a recipe for a great wrestling show. Dolph Ziggler, R-Truth, Drew McIntyre, and The Hart Dynasty all also stepped up their game and gives the future of the show a lot of promise. Notice that this show mostly focused on WRESTLING was better than RAW, the soap opera show. Just pointing that out.

WWE goes into 2010 with Bret Hart in their back pocket, and rumored Wrestlemania matches that look good. Guys like Kofi Kingston, The Miz, Jack Swagger, Evan Bourne, John Morrison, The Hart Dynasty, and others will help prove that WWE won the war with WCW because it was able to brand and cultivate new talent instead of shoving the old talent down our throats (odd that the company they’re at odds with now is doing the same thing).

Theo Fraser: With recent poor booking decisions such as the burial of CM Punk, the persistence with the lame DX comedy sketches and the dropping of the ball with regard to John Morrison and Dolph Ziggler’s respective pushes, it’s easy to forget the stellar year the WWE has provided across all brands. We’ve seen the emergence of bonafide new superstars in Kofi Kingston and Jack Swagger, alongside Rhodes and Dibiase solidifying their places as stars of the future in The Legacy, not to mention Punk cementing his spot in the main event. Matt Hardy’s heel turn got off to a great start and the future looked incredibly bright for him until he was traded to Raw and subsequently sidelined with injury. Jeff Hardy had a booming 2009, becoming the face of Smackdown for the most part of the year, leading us to some of the more memorable angles of the past 12 months. The Punk-Hardy feud carried Smackdown for the summer months, backed up by strong undercards with the 2009 version of the Smackdown Six; Punk, Hardy, Mysterio, Morrison, Jericho and Edge. And who could forget the exhilarating Jericho/Mysterio feud that provided quality match after quality match. Despite the Orton/HHH Wrestlemania match being one of the weakest Mania main events in the history of the prestigious event, the build-up was absolutely captivating with Orton going punt-crazy, taking out everyone remotely related to Trips. The whole Guest Host of Raw angle has also provided its share of entertaining moments, and has stayed fresh due to the intrigue of new and varied hosts each week, making Raw almost unmissable TV, even when it’s at its most infuriating. And let’s not forget the slew of awesome matches we’ve been privy to. The obvious HBK/Taker classic aside, we had the outstanding Cena/Edge Last Man Standing match, the technical masterpiece that was Jericho vs Mysterio at The Bash, Christian vs Swagger II on ECW, the TLC meeting between Punk and Jeff…even the perpetual Orton/Cena feud provided more than a few great encounters. Yes, the WWE still has its issues, but they made some terrific strides in 2009. If they can learn from their mistakes and push new talent and actually maintain said push, 2010 could be the year of change.

Stephen Randle: I feel like I could just cut and paste my speech from last year’s award, but what the hell, let’s go for it. There’s a saying that goes “if you’re not the lead dog, the view never changes”, and in the world of pro wrestling, WWE is the lead dog, and everyone else is stuck looking at it’s…er…tail. See, that would have been a dirtier joke if not for WWE’s (some say half-hearted) attempt to become a more family-friendly television program where grown men beat the crap out of each other. In addition, this year WWE saw fit to give us a Triple H-Randy Orton feud which started out incredibly and petered out into the most disappointing WrestleMania main event in recent history, the sometimes entertaining, sometimes embarrassing move towards celebrity guest hosts of their flagship show, and, of course, the endless presence of a midget.

But wait, isn’t this the award for Best Fed of the Year? Why yes, it is, and here’s why: despite all the crap that WWE shovels onto our television screens, they also don’t hesitate to bring the awesome in equal, if not greater amounts. In 2009, we saw a huge number of breakout Superstars, to the point that the voting for that category was undergoing massive shifts and incredibly close votes right up until the last possible second. From John Morrison and The Miz to Kofi Kingston, CM Punk, and even Sheamus, many wrestlers stepped up their game in an attempt to climb to the top of the mountain, and the result was a glut of incredible wrestling matches, both on TV and PPV. This past year also saw some epic feuds out of WWE, whether it be Shawn Michaels going to any lengths to try and dethrone The Undertaker, Chris Jericho fighting against “hypocritical” Legends, and Rey Mysterio, and anyone else who caught his attention, CM Punk using Jeff Hardy’s personal demons against him, Kofi Kingston demanding respect from Randy Orton, or even John Cena and Orton finally settling their long-running feud. The bottom line is, WWE started the year on top, and even though they had their share of garbage, they also consistently had the matches, the feuds, and the moments that surpassed anything anybody else did in 2009, and that is what helped them maintain their position in the front of the pack.

Mathew Sforcina: Ladies and Gentlemen: Inertia At Work. Despite WWE having a negative for every positive, a Hornswoggle/Chavo for every Punk/Hardy, a Jackson/Kozlov for every JeriShow, a Raw for every Smackdown, the fact remains that they are the biggest fed in the world. Hence, given that they didn’t suck totally for the whole year, they win. When you have guys like Jericho, Michaels, Punk, Hardy, Morrison, Miz, Kofi, on and on, that level of talent, and you use it well (most, well… some of the time), some other fed needs one hell of a good year to challenge. And even when they do, in the case of Dragon’s Gate USA, they still don’t win. Funny that…

Be sure to check out Part 1 and Part 2 now, and Part 4 tomorrow!