The Tuesday Small-For-All News Report: 01.26.09
Posted by Jeff Small on 01.26.2010
Midway Games Comes Full Circle, Small-For-All Malebag, The Latest on DX, Rock vs. Cena News, Kelly Kelly’s Latest Test, Raw Thoughts, AJ Styles Hates Backstabbers, The Latest on the Dirty Diva, and the MacGruber Trailer!
FRIENDSHIP
Longtime Smallophiles might remember my brief tryst with Midway Games. Back in the Summer of 2008 (I know, I know, a long long time ago - way before people tweeted. Way before Obama. Hell way before Lady Gaga.), JP and I were invited by Midway Games to check out the launch of TNA Impact: the Video Game, hobnob with such TNA legends like Hernandez, and most importantly, even get to watch TNA's Hard Justice PPV. In case you missed the highlight of my 411 career (seriously, shit like this ain't ever going to happen again), you can check it out here.
Well since this pivotal moment, much has changed in the world. TNA stars like Christian Cage returned to the WWE, the six sided ring went kaput, so did Midway Games, JP converted to Buddhism, and most importantly, I never picked up TNA Impact even after vowing to do so. Well up until this weekend! You see, I had a burning chunk of Best Buy Gift Cards to use and decided that I would splurge them on a PS3. With my new PS3 in tow, I needed a game or two to play and well after picking up a good game (like NBA2K10), there was one copy of TNA Impact on clearance for $15. And seeing as how Midway treated me to food, drinks (enough that I spilt a beer all over myself while talking to Kurt Angle), lodging, and a TNA PPV, I felt compelled to finally reciprocate the favor.
Sadly, real-life my experience did not make the game any better!
A sidenote: I texted JP right after I picked up Impact to which he responded that he did the same. And if that wasn't chock full o' irony, our Midway contact emailed me this past weekend to let me know that he was still living. Oh and to pimp his latest blog - Rhino Nights . Life's crazy sometimes. And so is this news report. Welcome…
In today's news report, we have a multitude of shiznit to speak on including DX plans,the latest on the Rock vs. John Cena, Kelly Kelly's latest Test, MacGruber, AJ Styles's attack on backstabbers, the current status of Ashley Massaro (hint: Dirty), and tons more! But first, the return of the Small-For-All Malebag!!!
TIGER… ah fuck it…
SWAYZE!!!
Yeah, I'm totally over the Tiger Woods femalebag.
Small's Retirement
I thought I made an obvious parallel to the Conan situation on NBC. However, a few people thought I was really being serious regarding CSONKA stealing my plushy Tuesday slot. (By the way, I really should have listened to Slimmer's idea – have CSONKA actually write next week's news report just to fuck with everyone. Too bad I never told CSONKA about my idea until well… I still haven't.)
To my surprise, I actually received a fit of reader email this week. Normally, I just receive comments, but emails are always appreciated. From emailer, Brian, "Okay, so I never really believed the Small being bumped back to Sunday and leaving in a huff story, I was still terrified by the concept that you would be hanging it up. You've alluded to burn out in the past so I had terror seizing my chest as I read this tale.
Anyway, keep up the good work. Thank you for not going away....please don't scare me again."
Brian, look the time will come when I will be hanging up my boots for good. And unlike Ric Flair, Terry Funk, and Brett Favre, once I say I am retired, I will be retired. No coming back six months later. No guest columns. When I call it quits, that will be it. And honestly, I am surprised it has not happened yet. However, it will happen soon. I've made a few mentions to it in earlier news reports and I'll say it again today – in the Fall, I am calling it quits. I haven't figured out the week yet (probably around my Fifth Year Anniversary), but I won't be making it until 2011.
Not much of a tease, I know. Butt this is –
TNA Thoughts
First, from commenter Pete, "Wasn't the Orlando Screw Job what got Orlando Jordan fired from the WWE?"
Ha, no, this is the real reason why OJ was fired:
If only he stated "No Homo" beforehand.
From Donners , "Don't worry, even the most ardent TNA fan is negative this week."
Honestly, I'm going to have to backpedal here and admit that on television, the show came off much better than on paper. Granted, it was still a mind-numbing mediocre episode but I was really expecting worse.
Reality Show Stars
Another piece of reader email I received was from contestant Chris Noel who like Kenny Dykstra will be starring on "Seducing Cindy", a new television show on Fox Reality Channel. Speaking of which, what's worse – the fact that Fox Reality Channel will be canceled as soon as this show ends and replaced with another Nat Geo OR that Cindy Margolis cannot even get a spot on a real channel. Even the fucking Cougar got a slot on TV Land! Why can't a snow leopard like Margolis get a slot between Designing Women and the Golden Girls? (I kid, Margolis isn't a snowie yet.)
Anyhoo, Chris's reason for his email (outside of a plug, which of course he shall receive) is that he has a huge Undertaker tattoo on his back. See –
Eh heh, I guess nothing says I love you like the Prince of Darkness. God, I wish I got Fox Reality.
Gifts For Me
The last email I received was from a man named Nick who was nice enough to send me a copy of Zack Ryder's theme music. Now if only Nick would pay for the Royal Rumble this coming weekend!
Hey, it's better than the last gift I received from a fan. Then again, that gift keeps on giving.
Thanks Slimmer. Thanks a lot.
NEWS FROM TITAN TOWERS
You know since last week worked out well and there's really nothing of note to speak on, let's do another set of one-liners.
Biten' Newsbites
Shawn Michaels appeared on the radio in San Antonio and hinted that DX will be disbanding so both men can focus on their WrestleMania program(s).
Judging by the way I really want to see HBK vs. HHH, I have a feeling what we will get instead is a HHH vs. HBK – winner get custody of Hornswoggle match. Because that's hilarious!
In an interview with Live Audio Wrestling, The Rock stated that he has no interest in wrestling John Cena.
I guess the Rock really has no interest in starring in anything the public wants to see!
R-Truth told The New Zealand Herald that he and John Cena are talking about collaborating on a music project of their own.
Perhaps they can call themselves Cookie.
Kelly Kelly recently told the Daily Star that late wrestler Test was the love of her life.
Once again, I must give props to Test for plowing some of the hottest Divas during his short life – Kelly Kelly , Stacy Keibler, Essa Rios… oh wait, that was a dude.
Maryse recently had dental work done.
Didn't her mother tell her to beware of large objects being thrown in her face?
Kudos to the WWE for still hyping both stars of Pysch as guest hosts after word that the white guy is at a local medical facility. Then again, there's a great chance that he will steal an ambulance and attack the Corporation before the end of the night.
Wow, HBK's getting heel heat for sending the midget home. I do believe it's time to break up the Band. And by Band, I mean DX. Not those old, washed up guys on the other channel clogging up the main event.
Hey why weren't DX serious when they actually HAD a shot at the WWE Championship at Survivor Series?
So wait, in the past, Shawn would tag himself in after a pedigree to deliver an elbow drop. Now why is Huntor all pissed about this now? I so hope these guys break up on Sunday.
Another good MVP/Miz exchange though not on the level of last week. Then leave it to the WWE writers to job MVP out in under 2 minutes.
Damn, that black dude's got funk soul, brotha! He's silky smooth.
Spoiler: The Undertaker's DONG will win the Royal Rumble.
You know what would make Maryse even better than she already is (and trust me, she's the best woman on the WWE roster)? A Lady Gaga gimmick. At least for Halloween.
Oh wow, Eve is busting out the moveset tonight – moonsault, Northern Lights suplex, and Armbar. Ooo oui.
I must say that Vince is on point tonight. Sure his promo is nothing great but he snide remarks to the crowd and to Cena have been amazing. Oh and that jacket is pimptastic.
And I must say that Cena's response was pretty damn good too. I'm glad Bret Hart returns next week as we have a PPV to build to.
OH. MY. GAWD. I haven't wanted a wrestling t-shirt in years but I am dying to pick up the Miz's new t-shirt. I must hand it to him – he's doing pretty, pretty, pretty well for himself. First, he fucked Trishelle and now he has an Awesome T-shirt.
Damn that MVP! Kofi would never have beaten the Miz without help from his brotha. This is racist! Wait until February rolls around – boy, do I have a surprise for them!
Wow, this guest host guy is almost as irrelevant as ZZ Top. Then again, he did book a Kelly Kelly match. That's always a plus.
I was about to ask where Jack Swagger was this week but I am glad that the WWE is continuing his red-hot feud with Santino. Perhaps, he's better off on ECW.
So when Carlito left the ring during Swagger's attack, why didn't Kelly Kelly attack him? Dumb blonde.
You know, Cena's actually funny tonight. This is a good night for him.
You'd think that with Maryse winning earlier in the night, Gail Kim would be a shoe-in for the finals. Then again, Gail did not even get an entrance. And Gail wins with the Shoe-in!
While Alicia's slap was bitchtastic, surely the WWE will be out of the mainstream media this week. Good thing William Shatner is around next week.
I must say that the Cena/Sheamus feud really died off in 2010. Either Sheamus is clear of the Cenamobile heading into WrestleMania (which is good if he likes to keep his belt) or there will be a hotshot change next month in the Elimination Chamber.
Eh, the Sheamus vs. Cena match was nothing to write home about. Seeing as how Cena normally does a better job at carrying wrestlers, this does not bode well for the title match at the Royal Rumble.
Nice Kanyon-esque RKO on Sheamus tonight.
Pretty bland "go-home" episode of Raw tonight. In fact, the WWE did a much better job promoting the Rumble last week. Not to mention that Dule Hill did nothing of note as a Guest Host. Granted, the WWE probably had better comedy on tap if James Roday was around, but the wrestling was lacking this evening. Oh well.
FUN WITH MACGRUBER!!!
Take a look at all these WWE superstars that will be appearing in SNL's latest movie flop, MacGruber! Seeing as how they are only in the trailer for a few seconds, one must think that they do not play a large role in the movie. Kind of like how the Rock was blown to pieces within a minute of appearing in Reno 911.
NEWS FROM O-TOWN
And like the WWE thoughts, I might as well be fair with TNA.
Stolen from all your favorite sources:
In an interview with the UK Sun, AJ Styles went on the attack against the WWE stating that the company is full of backstabbers.
Good thing TNA is not trying to do anything stupid with AJ like have him stand next to a bunch of taller people all the time or dye his hair blond.
According to the Wrestling Observer, there is talk that AJ Styles will have his hair dyed blond like Ric Flair.
Yeah, AJ, there are no backstabbers in TNA. Have fun when you are jobbing to Hogan.
The storyline with Jay Lethal vs. WWE Legends was supposed to end with Lethal dropping the Macho Man gimmick. However, with the new change in regime, Lethal's TNA status is uncertain.
Yeah, AJ, there are no backstabbers in TNA. Have fun when you are jobbing to the real Macho Man.
At the recent Survivor finale, Ashley Massaro stated that she has been in contact with Dixie Carter in regards to a TNA debut.
Who needs Awesome Kong and Alissa Flash when everyone's favorite Dirty Diva is set to debut? Cross the Line baby!
Before Impact on Thursday, the last time the Nasty Boys teamed on TV was on December 9th, 1996.
Of course, this does not count the time they teamed up on Brooke Hogan, because I doubt that made it past VH1's "censors."
COMING ATTRACTIONS
Since I will be out of town next week, tune in to another special Guest Host edition of the Small-For-All! Until then…
For the Tuesday Small-For-All News Report, I'm Jeff Small… and you're not!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Maryse won't be the best woman on the roster until she can actually get a reaction out of the crowd.
Am I the only one that thinks the white guy that was supposed to host Raw intentionally scheduled surgery for today, so he would be able to no-show? I know I would.
Posted By: Guest#8976 (Guest) on January 25, 2010 at 11:53 PM
SWAYZE!!!
Posted By: MBD (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Wow, amazing how this guy manages to get just about everything wrong.
"Hey why weren't DX serious when they actually HAD a shot at the WWE Championship at Survivor Series?"
Wasn't that the great match that started with HBK superkicking the shit out of HHH from nowhere?
"Damn, that black dude's got funk soul, brotha! He's silky smooth."
"Damn that MVP! Kofi would never have beaten the Miz without help from his brotha. This is racist!"
This is speaking for itself...
"he did book a Kelly Kelly match. That's always a plus"; "Cena's actually funny tonight. This is a good night for him."
1. KK sucks in the ring, and if you just want her around to leer, you need to either get an internet connection & some lube or, you know, get laid. 2. No, just no. Weak punchlines with a guest host who is *literally* just phoning it in, do not a good night make.
"leave it to the WWE writers to job MVP out in under 2 minutes."
I'm not an unfair man, and I'll give credit for being right at least once in the column--this was idiocy.
"Eh, the Sheamus vs. Cena match was nothing to write home about. Seeing as how Cena normally does a better job at carrying wrestlers, this does not bode well for the title match at the Royal Rumble."
On the contrary, that was quite easily their best televised match (and the best on Raw in 2 weeks), with much better back and forth and psychology than their TLC match. Actually, it's the only good booking Sheamus has been involved in since winning the title shot under Ventura. And Cena is great at carrying wrestlers? I certainly don't remember him doing that throughout any more than 3 mins of his 60 min Iron Man w/ Orton last year.
Other than clumsy to abysmal wrestling insight, I guess he provides comic relief for 411/wrestling? But unfortunately it doesn't even rise to the level of immature douchebaggery, which has its place. This is more like what might have passed for redneck kitsch in the 1960s, but in today's world, where laughing at the backwards and the downtrodden is out of style, it's just embarrassing.
I won't waste my time with this drivel again.
Posted By: Smalls sucks (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 12:30 AM
Orlando wasn't fired because he was gay. Orlando was fired for letting gay men backstage. They than got Nunzio drunk and took pictures of him in bicurious positions.
Posted By: Guest#9075 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 12:30 AM
"Maryse won't be the best woman on the roster until she can actually get a reaction out of the crowd."
Maryse, despite being a heel, gets a bigger face reaction when her music hits than most of her opponents, including tonight's match with Eve.
Posted By: Guest#3041 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 12:44 AM
Wow, this guest host guy is almost as irrelevant as ZZ Top. Then again, he did book a Kelly Kelly match. That's always a plus.
ZZ Top got a leg match, douchebag. Geez, get serious or you'll get the pink slip.
Posted By: gene (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 01:20 AM
So OJ was let go because he was gay (or bi)? Does anyone else see the irony in this, back from Billy & Chuck to the bits with Jericho and Show lately? Fuck, nothing I hate more than are hypocrites--especially those from Connecticut.
Posted By: CC Fanboy (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 01:50 AM
Small sucks = Slimmer
You heard it here first!
Posted By: Guest#6719 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 01:56 AM
Back to my point from the other day, AJ dying his hair blond just continues TNA's plan to make Styles just a 'poor man's version' of Ric Flair. Terrible.
Posted By: Truth (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 01:57 AM
Am I the only one that thinks the white guy that was supposed to host Raw intentionally scheduled surgery for today, so he would be able to no-show? I know I would.
Posted By: Guest#8976 (Guest) on January 25, 2010 at 11:53 PM
------------------------------------------------------
Yes, yes you are. And he's Mexican. Roday is short for Rodriguez.
Posted By: Koby (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 02:12 AM
"Maryse won't be the best woman on the roster until she can actually get a reaction out of the crowd."
Maryse, despite being a heel, gets a bigger face reaction when her music hits than most of her opponents, including tonight's match with Eve.
Posted By: Guest#3041 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 12:44 AM
I admit you're actually right because the 4 or 5 overweight men clapping for Maryse were more than the absolute zero number of people reacting when Eve was introduced
Posted By: jasonel (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 02:17 AM
Orlando wasn't fired because he was gay. Orlando was fired for letting gay men backstage. They than got Nunzio drunk and took pictures of him in bicurious positions.
Posted By: Guest#9075 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 12:30 AM
Wrong.
He was fired for letting gay teenagers backstage. Pat Patterson almost relapsed on the addiction he spent years trying to beat.
Posted By: Comment Poster X (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 02:50 AM
wow,a TNA Small hater...wooooooo
Posted By: NS (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 05:16 AM
I pity the person who thinks Maryse is the best Diva on the roster.
If TNA does indeed make the mistake of hiring Ahsley looks likes they're copying the WWE yet again by hiring a host of identical talentless blondes and not pushing or getting rid of any women who actually possess even the slightest hint of wrestling skill.
Posted By: Red (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 05:20 AM
$300+ on a PS3 and you pick up TNA iMPACT????? I felt raped after paying $3 to rent that garbage. That $15 has to sting, but imagine the pain the early adopters felt after paying the full $60 during release!
Posted By: Byzdalmyt (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 06:45 AM
That's not Swayze, That's Bodhi
Posted By: Capt Oats (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 07:44 AM
"Maryse won't be the best woman on the roster until she can actually get a reaction out of the crowd."
Exactly. The IWC think she's over like Trish because about 5 people in the crowd cheer for her. That's due to her natural sexiness but aside from that the vast majority of people don't care. Put her in a match with Kelly Kelly and you'll see that K2 will get a huge reaction in comparison. The crowd really loves her. I like Maryse but don't fall over myself like the IWC does for her, why? Because she's French? Those self-hating Americans.
Dirty Diva Ashley Massaro...now that's my kinda woman. While I don't think TNA should sign her I did really like her in WWE. She was the definition of class and originality. Her beauty was both inner and outer. She's high class too....she bathes in Evian water, dresses only in the latest fashion, has houses across the globe, Swiss bank accounts, you name it.
Posted By: Guest#6904 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 08:06 AM
Orlando Jordan looks like Samuel L Jackson.
Posted By: Propagandhi (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 08:18 AM
Man, HBK and Triple H in yet another fued.
Wow, wait to push those young studs WWE.
The young studs of the WWE:
Batista
Triple H
HBK
Undertaker
Posted By: elvylanda (guest) (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 09:21 AM
- "Spoiler: The Undertaker's DONG will win the Royal Rumble."
Mmmmmmmm, That's sexy.
The Undertaker can rumble my royal with his dong anytime.
Posted By: Ron Mexico (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 09:28 AM
"The storyline with Jay Lethal vs. WWE Legends was supposed to end with Lethal dropping the Macho Man gimmick. However, with the new change in regime, Lethal's TNA status is uncertain.
Yeah, AJ, there are no backstabbers in TNA. Have fun when you are jobbing to the real Macho Man."
Hogan's in charge. Do you honestly think he's going to have the Macho Man actually win a match?!?
Posted By: Brad B (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 09:31 AM
Well Cena hate aside he has gotten better at carrying his side of a match and when need to carrying an opponent. That iron man crap with Orton was written and booked wrong to begin with. Before you put all that on Cena remember Orton didn't do much better in that match either.
As for this guy and his column seemed he was just half assing it himself just to get something done.
However I will admit that AJ's interview about backstabbers in the WWE is funny given whats going on in TNA right now.
Posted By: Guest#2027 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 09:46 AM
"Wow, amazing how this guy manages to get just about everything wrong.
"Hey why weren't DX serious when they actually HAD a shot at the WWE Championship at Survivor Series?"
Wasn't that the great match that started with HBK superkicking the shit out of HHH from nowhere?
"Damn, that black dude's got funk soul, brotha! He's silky smooth."
"Damn that MVP! Kofi would never have beaten the Miz without help from his brotha. This is racist!"
This is speaking for itself...
"he did book a Kelly Kelly match. That's always a plus"; "Cena's actually funny tonight. This is a good night for him."
1. KK sucks in the ring, and if you just want her around to leer, you need to either get an internet connection & some lube or, you know, get laid. 2. No, just no. Weak punchlines with a guest host who is *literally* just phoning it in, do not a good night make.
"leave it to the WWE writers to job MVP out in under 2 minutes."
I'm not an unfair man, and I'll give credit for being right at least once in the column--this was idiocy.
"Eh, the Sheamus vs. Cena match was nothing to write home about. Seeing as how Cena normally does a better job at carrying wrestlers, this does not bode well for the title match at the Royal Rumble."
On the contrary, that was quite easily their best televised match (and the best on Raw in 2 weeks), with much better back and forth and psychology than their TLC match. Actually, it's the only good booking Sheamus has been involved in since winning the title shot under Ventura. And Cena is great at carrying wrestlers? I certainly don't remember him doing that throughout any more than 3 mins of his 60 min Iron Man w/ Orton last year.
Other than clumsy to abysmal wrestling insight, I guess he provides comic relief for 411/wrestling? But unfortunately it doesn't even rise to the level of immature douchebaggery, which has its place. This is more like what might have passed for redneck kitsch in the 1960s, but in today's world, where laughing at the backwards and the downtrodden is out of style, it's just embarrassing.
I won't waste my time with this drivel again.
Posted By: Smalls sucks (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 12:30 AM"
So you waster enough time to write a small novel about Smalls, but we are to believe you won't be coming back to see if your work is acknowledged? Liar!!
Oh and Smalls, you can watch most Fox Reality tv shows on hulu.
Posted By: Todd Vote (Registered) on January 26, 2010 at 10:38 AM
Your retirement couldn't come quicker Small. Hopefully 411 brings back Czonka when your candyass is gone!
Posted By: Essa Rios (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 10:47 AM
Rhino Nights? what does that mean? great "rack of the week" though... i agree 100% on that choice!
Posted By: guest (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 11:37 AM
thank god you're retiring from writing this bullshit soon. you suck-
also-TNA and Hogan are amazing.
Posted By: Guest#2284 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 11:40 AM
About Maryse--
it seems like all the people who hate her are the ones who think wrestling is just "rasslin" the technical snobs who think there's no room in WWE for anything else (which shows how stupid they are... since the technical side is the one thing WWE could give a crap about).
Maryse has her character down, the bitchiness PERFECTLY. She looks like SUCH a bitch out there that it sometimes actually looks like real bitchiness. THAT is what she does awesomely, not "technical wizardry" or "athleticism"
You know who Maryse would be great with? Beth. Beth IS good at all that physical stuff, and for a "power girl" she's damn easy on the eyes as well. Put them together (on the same side, not in a feud) and that would be money.
Posted By: Guest#5318 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 11:51 AM
@Smalls Sucks
Cena vs Khali was immensely watchable, and he's more than held his own with a huge variety of wrestlers over the years. Numerous matches with JBL, Big Show, Kane etc.
The DX "serious" comment comes from the fact there was no dissension or threats of breaking up the team at SurSer...so why now? Because they're going for HBK vs HHH that's why.
The 'racist' comment was intentional irony....look it up.
I agree about the general shittyness of KK, but Cena was indeed funny. Humour is subjective though, can't say either is wrong.
Also agree with the Sheamus match, decent outing for both until the finish.
So to summarise, you suck an equal amount to Small. In fact, more because you missed the obvious irony.
Posted By: dennett316 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 01:07 PM
"I admit you're actually right because the 4 or 5 overweight men clapping for Maryse were more than the absolute zero number of people reacting when Eve was introduced"
Not clapping, a face pop. And it was loud enough to easily be heard on TV. Nobody said the roof came off the building, but it was big enough to be acknowledged.
Posted By: Guest#1223 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 02:18 PM
Maryse isn't that hot. Certainly no better looking than most other blonde bimbos on TV.
If she is the "best" WWE has to offer, that just shows how far the divas have fallen off the cliff since Trish Stratus left. I guess that's the problem when you build the entire division around one woman for so long, and then she decides to leave.
Thing with Trish though is that she could actually go in the ring, had amazing charisma, knew how to work the crowd perfectly, was pretty good as a talker and actress, and was genuinely beautiful(as opposed to just "hot" like the current divas). She would still be dominating the company today if she stuck around, which is pretty obvious based on the appearances she made in 2008 and 2009. She hasn't lost any of that; she's actually better looking now on top of it all!!!
She also has real star power, the "it factor" that seperates the good ones from the great ones. There's a reason why she is still in demand, unlike other female "stars" that have been relegated to the wrestling convention circuit.
So WWE is still in a rebuilding phase with the women. They are still trying to find the next Trish. So they can try and force it with certain women like Maryse and Kelly. But they look so stupid and helpless out there that eventually WWE will give up on them, and move on to the next batch of women they hire.
Until you find somebody with the potential to become the next megastar, the division will continue to be insulting 2 minute matches with a bunch of random bimbos that nobody cares about.
Posted By: Guest#6649 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 03:24 PM
Before Impact on Thursday, the last time the Nasty Boys teamed on TV was on December 9th, 1996.
-----------------------
I read somewhere on the net that they were supposed to return to the WWE a few years ago. Unfortunately they had a borderline shoot with Drew McIntyre (who ended up fighting back) and pretty much got released because of it. (No idea if it's true though.)
Posted By: Dave (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 03:47 PM
Lay off the guy about Maryse. If he likes her because she is hot and tries to be funny, so be it. Sure beats the hell out of watching overrated chicks like Mickie James and Gail Kim do their unique versions of "wrestling".
Face it, the only legit diva they have ever had is Trish. She's gorgeous, she's atheltic, she has charisma, and she always knows how to carry herself. WWE can't replace her, and they aren't even trying anymore.
Trish's only "rival" was Lita, an ugly whore that only got over because she nearly killed herself in every match. And she's the closest thing Trish had to competition. That goes to show you the women's division has basically always sucked. You just don't have the golden girl around anymore to help you ignore all the crap that's surrounding her.
By today's standards, Maryse is not that bad.
Posted By: Guest#7152 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 03:56 PM
Maryse is easily one of if not the worst all round wrestlers in the world right now. The talentless bitch has nothing to offer except her looks, which are not all that great. Hopefully the writer of this column is aware of this and is trying to be funny, because if he's not he shouldn't be writing for this or any web site, or allowed out without adult supervision for that matter.
Posted By: Guest#2722 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 04:04 PM
"Orlando Jordan looks like Samuel L. Jackson."
I think he looks more like Seal but with Buckwheat hair.
Posted By: Guest#3838 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 04:45 PM
Dule Hill wasn't "irrelevant." In fact, in the grand scope of things, cross promoting between two of your highest rated shows makes Hill (and Roday if he'd been there) some of the most relevant guest hosts they could have had. Also, just like I said in another article, just because you don't know who he is, doesn't mean no one else does. Psych is a great show and I feel sorry for the miserable, joyless, sad-sack who doesn't find some enjoyment in it. Of course, this is the internet, where it's mandatory to hate pretty much everything so that you appear smart and cool.
Posted By: SeanAltly (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 04:59 PM
When I go see the WWE in March (show right before Mania), I'll be sure to pop for Maryse and let her know that The Small For All loves her.
And I can't believe the hate on Small. I'm looking forward to his comments on Santinos sitcom and TNAs poll about biggest gain.
Posted By: midcard madness (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 06:29 PM
haha good point about the Aj Styes backstabbing bits
Posted By: Guest#9957 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 07:08 PM
Lay off the guy about Maryse. If he likes her because she is hot and tries to be funny, so be it. Sure beats the hell out of watching overrated chicks like Mickie James and Gail Kim do their unique versions of "wrestling".
Face it, the only legit diva they have ever had is Trish. She's gorgeous, she's atheltic, she has charisma, and she always knows how to carry herself. WWE can't replace her, and they aren't even trying anymore.
Trish's only "rival" was Lita, an ugly whore that only got over because she nearly killed herself in every match. And she's the closest thing Trish had to competition. That goes to show you the women's division has basically always sucked. You just don't have the golden girl around anymore to help you ignore all the crap that's surrounding her.
By today's standards, Maryse is not that bad.
Posted By: Guest#7152 (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 03:56 PM
Lay off her? I would like to lay on her
Posted By: Entendre (Guest) on January 26, 2010 at 10:23 PM
God damn you fucking suck.
Posted By: Guest#0051 (Guest) on January 27, 2010 at 03:01 AM
"Trish's only "rival" was Lita, an ugly whore that only got over because she nearly killed herself in every match. And she's the closest thing Trish had to competition. That goes to show you the women's division has basically always sucked. You just don't have the golden girl around anymore to help you ignore all the crap that's surrounding her."
Yeah, "an ugly whore" who was also very popular (though not as Trish) and will be far more remembered than ANY of today's bimbos.
Posted By: Guest#0426 (Guest) on January 27, 2010 at 07:44 AM
" I do believe it's time to break up the Band. And by Band, I mean DX. Not those old, washed up guys on the other channel clogging up the main event."
-Jeff Small-
Yeah, I agree with that statement. It stinks that OLD, WASHED UP guys like the Undertaker, HBK and Batista are clogging up the main event on the other channel ... Smackdown on MYNETWORK TV.
Posted By: Ernie rey (guest) (Guest) on January 27, 2010 at 09:13 AM
Yeah, I agree with that statement. It stinks that OLD, WASHED UP guys like the Undertaker, HBK and Batista are clogging up the main event on the other channel ... Smackdown on MYNETWORK TV.
Posted By: Ernie rey (guest) (Guest) on January 27, 2010 at 09:13 AM
________________________________________
Man, who would want to be a writer on here? All these retards reading who can't even understand when you're being witty.
Posted By: Chungles (Guest) on January 27, 2010 at 05:11 PM
"I have a feeling what we will get instead is a HHH vs. HBK – winner get custody of Hornswoggle match. Because that's hilarious!
In an interview with Live Audio Wrestling, The Rock stated that he has no interest in wrestling John Cena.
I guess the Rock really has no interest in starring in anything the public wants to see"
Okay, first of all, custody over Hornswoggle? Nobody wants to see that pg bullshit.
And second, John Cena Vs The Rock? I'd rather see anything other than that! Cena would not be able to have a great match with the Rock
Posted By: John (Guest) on January 27, 2010 at 07:11 PM
Fuck Maryse.
I know I would.
Posted By: Dr. Ino Eyewood (Guest) on January 27, 2010 at 07:14 PM
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