The MeeThinks Friday FreeThinks: 03.05.10

Posted by John Meehan on 03.05.2010

WWE trims the roster fat, TNA loses a Knockout, Angelo Poffo passes away, the chances of Money in the Bank being cashed in at WrestleMania, Kayfabesbook, the Debuts, Departures, and Disabled List, the Sell and Tell of the Week, and more!

Greetings, all -- and welcome back to the Friday FreeThinks. And since it seems to be *such* a burning question on so many readers' minds:

YES, Kayfabesbook is back.

(This is the part where you start scrolling, yes?)

A quick note before we start, however:

Thanks to all for the continued readership and comments with or without this inexplicably popular feature on any given week. To the haters? Get over yourselves. The 411 staff (particularly our core news reporters in the 'rasslin section) busts their collective humps each and every week to deliver the best possible product that we can. Invariably, some weeks will produce stronger columns than others, but even if certain authors' style or content coverage doesn't quite happen to fit your taste, there's just no denying that each of these columns remain a labor of love, dedication, and a great deal of time.

(Well ok -- that and cat pictures).

So yeah: thanks, all. Let's get to the wrestling news, yes?

Rock & Roll.

The SELL of the week goes to Dolph Ziggler, who took not just one but TWO killer bumps this past Friday night on Smackdown!, and did his absolute best to make his opponents look like out-and-out world beaters before sneaking in at the last minute to pick up a victory and earn himself a place in this year's Money in the Bank ladder match at WrestleMania. Dolph's first tumble came when R-Truth dumped him waaaaay over the top rope and out of the ring to the arena floor (and he sold it like he'd just been flattened by a Mac Truck), but his second -- and perhaps even *more* memorable -- bump came just before the bout's conclusion, where he took a sick faceplant onto the edge of the ring apron and managed to convince a pretty audible chunk of the crowd in live attendance that he might just have cracked his orbital bone. "I am perfection?" This week, Dolph proved it.

The TELL of the week goes to Jerry Saggs Brian Knobbs (phantom edit for the win!), who has absolutely zero business being in a professional wrestling ring in 2010. Seriously, it's just painful to watch. When the Nasty Boys returned, I gave them the benefit of the doubt. But this week? Knobbs and Saggs squared off against Team 3D in a tables match, and things went from "bad" to "abysmal" before you could say "Welcome to Nastyville." Seriously, Brian, you look terrible out there. Overweight, out of shape, out of breath, and slower than molasses. And the fact that it has gotten to the point where you literally just lie around on the ring mat turning purple and gasping for air while folks are forced to "wrestle" around you (if you can call it that) is a pretty solid indicator that you either need to hit a gym or hang up the boots for good.

None - As WWE trims its roster on the Road to WrestleMania and TNA seems to be saving its biggest surprises for their March 8 head-to-head show with Monday Night RAW, there have been no new or newly redebuting performers over the past seven days time.



It's like real-time reader feedback on steroids

You've got questions? I've got smarmy comments answers. Keep 'em short, topical, and classy, and I'll post the best of 'em in next week's column.

Submit your questions here.

Now then -- onto this week's questions:

my girlfriend happened to be in the room when I was watching WWE and she actually asked me about Serena when C.M. Punk came to the ring. She found it refreshing to see a change of pace from the typical Diva. Do you think other female fans agree?

If I were a betting man, I'd say "yup."

WWE has been on a serious tear towards rebranding their image as "family friendly" and their divas as "smart, sexy and powerful." In short? They wanna' attract as many fans as they can (male and female alike) -- and it certainly can't hurt them to throw a few "unconventional" stars out into the center of the ring as if to say "hey kids, you don't have to look like all of these other guys (or gals) if you wanna' make it as a professional wrestler."


But let's be honest here -- you wouldn't say no.

While marketing 101 will tell you that "image is everything" and consumers will always find themselves attracted to a product that carries a subtextual promise to make them smarter, prettier, or better simply by being associated with it -- the simple truth to the matter is that at the heart of it? People likewise tend to gravitate towards things which remind them of themselves.

Or, as the old dating rule of thumb goes: "if you're a 5, you usually end up with a 5. If you're a 7? You'll end up with a 7." (and so on).

Seeing people who "look like you" on TV helps you identify with them. That's why skinny emo kids used to dig the Hardyz (and why fat goth chicks on the internet still can't help but sweat their junk today). Broadening the array of performers on your television programs helps make your roster (and, in turn, your product) more accessible to a wider audience. And girls like Serena go a long way in attracting fans (both male and female alike) who might not otherwise fit into that "conventional" mold set by so many other WWE performers.

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Isn't DiBiase's "Dream Street" (awesome finisher name, btw) the same as Billy Gunn's old finisher "The One and Only"? Gunn used to use it a lot in 2001 when his gimmick was "The One" Billy Gunn. (wow, all of that rhymed.)

Good catch.

And kudos to all who pointed out the fact that DiBiase (junior's) finisher is actually reminiscent both of Billy Gunn's AND an early version of the original Million Dollar Dream used by Ted DiBiase (senior) on occassion all those many years ago.

Careful with the rhyming, though. We all know what happened to Planet Stasiak...


Oh the places you'll go...
Like the unemployment line, for example.

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How is Cena vs Batista fresh when they faced each other at Summerslam 08?

A match doesn't have to be a first-time encounter in order to remain "fresh." Heck, Shawn Michaels and The Undertaker's critically acclaimed WrestleMania 25 showdown was hardly the first time that these two future Hall of Famers went at it either.

"Fresh"ness comes not because two folks have never faced off before, but rather as a direct result of how the storylines build towards each new encounter along the way. Sure, Cena and Batista did, in fact, lock horns at the Adamle Original Summerslam contest in 2008 (and again for a brief second or two last week) -- but a lot has changed since then. And if you watch this week's RAW? It's pretty clear that there is a lot more at stake *this* time around than the last time these two superstars stood toe-to-toe.


"Memories... of the way we were..."

Sure, John Cena wants the belt (um... duh?), but with that killer promo this past week on RAW, Batista has raised the stakes higher than ever before: John Cena has been christened the "poster boy of World Wrestling Entertainment," and The Animal is insanely jealous and desperate to prove him wrong. At Summerslam 2008, these two men squared off as peers, equals, and friends. But at WrestleMania 2010? New battle lines have been drawn as true colors have emerged. It's become a fresh and intensely personal feud -- and a violent one, at that.

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While I don't care for Danielson that much and don't see whatsthe big deal about him as Ive seen his matches and was bored, do you think the WWE is burying his past accomplishments. Similar to what Orton did to Punk.

Couldn't disagree with you more.

In fact, I'm all but convinced on the notion that the entire first "season" of NXT is specifically designed to be one great big starmaking vehicle to help introduce Bryan Danielson to the WWE Universe in a way that plays directly to his strengths (skill, heart) while giving him a chance to get over in spite of his "conventional" weaknesses (size, charisma).

Vince McMahon loves to remind us that his company is really just a bunch of "storytellers," and the story of Daniel Bryan's WWE career is only in its first act. He has the heart and the dedication, no doubt (heck, he went the distance with the CHAMP!) -- but he's still got a lot to learn and a long way to go.


His whole life was a million to one shot...

Rocky Balboa 101: If fans are going to accept you as a "lovable underdog," then you've probably gotta' look like a loser before you can ever turn out to be a success.

Give it a chance and give it time, and I really do think Daniel Bryan will surprise you.

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Whatever happen with the CM Punk/Orton feud?

I'm pretty sure the Big Boss Man packed it into the briefcase before hoisting it high away from the ring and making his daring escape in the black Hummer alongside Beaver Cleavage and Hade Vansen.

No seriously -- it was really just a case of brand separation and the necessity to realign each show's heel and face roles accordingly. When CM Punk made the jump to Smackdown!, he came in with a chip on his shoulder as the guy who'd been screwed out of his championship. Nevermind *who* screwed him, of course (cough Orton cough) -- the fact was he had worked his butt off to become champ, and was tired of seeing slackers and shortcut screwups being rewarded around him when he and he alone was living by the rules that *should* see virtue rewarded.

Enter Jeff Hardy, and Orton becomes a pretty insignificant footnote (though I'm sure WWE hasn't ruled out the notion of a second Punk/Orton feud down the line when the time is right).

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Who did Jillian make hate her to make her put up with the crap she does.

That's a great question.

From the "fixer" with the hideous mole gimmick to the wannabe-Britney singer schtick, Jillian Hall is arguably the female equivalent of WWE's Mark Henry: poor girl has been handed some of the lamest, most embarrassing gimmicks in all of the recent history of the company. And yet in spite of it all? She's still going strong, making the most of whatever is handed to her, and gainfully employed to boot.

The professional wrestling business is a funny place. In fact, it's a lot like high school on steroids (literally). The pretty, athletic folks tend to get by on looks alone. And the rest are expected to either fall in line or be just wierd enough to get themselves noticed.

Coming up through the Ohio Valley Wrestling ranks, there was talk that Jillian had developed something of a backstage attitude problem: and that was a no-no. Sure, she was blonde and had the pre-requisite breast implants, but there's no denying the fact that she wasn't quite the Queen Bee when it came to the naturally good-looking department (especially when stacked against the bikini models and/or Playboy centerfolds of the world). As such, her betters decided to saddle her with a total clunker of an onscreen gimmick to teach the poor girl a bit of humility (kinda like MVP's losing streak, now that I think of it). Basically, the company figured they'd see how far they could push her before she snapped. But to her credit? She took it all in stride, and actually managed to get herself over in the process.


Still convinced it looks more like a pretzel, but whatever...

Same goes for the singing gimmick: Vinny Mac was (supposedly) miffed at Hulk Hogan for one thing or another, and so he decided to take a pot-shot at the Red and Yellow Express's wannabe-singer of a daughter, Brooke. Hence the creation of an onscreen gimmick of a dellusional blonde with no real singing ability whatsoever. Jillian had already demonstrated her heelish charm and "company (wo)man" chops by gutting it out through the moley-moley-mole gimmick, and so the decision was made to have her transition into the wannabe-BritBrit role.

But for what it's worth, though -- "crappy" though her gimmicks may well indeed have been, they certainly have helped her stand out from the otherwise homogenous diva parade. Kinda begs the question: would you rather have a "crappy" gimmick that keeps you employed, or NO gimmick and find yourself jobless?

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Suppose that The Undertaker WILL (might,would,could- watever.) lose his legendary Streak this year, will the WWE take the risk to make another streak for another wrestler? If it's possible, would it be sensible to give it to a young and upcoming Superstar

Doubtful.

The Undertaker's "streak" is equal parts luck, politics, marketing savvy, fluke, and lightning in a bottle. By all reliable indicators, the company never quite set out to market an "unbeaten at WrestleMania" gimmick in the first place -- and the few performers who have come close to replicating such success in recent years (Edge, Cena) have each suffered a high-profile loss to pretty much put a nail in the coffin of any ideas that WWE would try to revisit the same angle with a next-gen performer, regardless of how popular they may be.

In fact, The Undertaker himself kinda' lucked into the gimmick, too. For the first few years of his WrestleMania tenure, it just made good booking sense to have the guy go over at the time -- and really, nobody noticed he'd racked up a whole mess of victories on The Grandest Stage of Them All until some years later. Namely? Right about the time when he was headed for a WrestleMania X-Seven showdown against Triple H.


It's time to play the game.

Urban legend has it that the then-WWF first stumbled on the idea of "the streak" simply as a marketing ploy to help sell what was otherwise a pretty routine (although awesome) showdown between two guys who were battling at The Grandaddy of Them All without so much as a championship belt between them. Word has it that Vinny Mac and company fixated on "the streak" going into the bout simply because the plan was to have The Dead Man come out of his match against Triple H a loser, and thus make The Game look all the more impressive for having beaten the unbeatable.

Thankfully, longterm discretion and cooler heads prevailed, and The Undertaker continued rollin' (rollin', rollin') with an unbeaten streak at WrestleMania to this very day. And along the way, we've seen some pretty epic WrestleMania encounters as a direct result.

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At last week's Raw(23rd Feb), Cody Rhodes had used his former tag team partner and co-champion, Crash Holly's (that's his name right?)finisher- The Alabama Slam. Is there any wrestler who has had used their former tag team partner's, or mentor's, finisher

You're thinking of Bob Holly.

But since the line between mentors and tag team partners so often gets blurred (because let's be honest here, who HASN'T tagged with their mentor at one time or another?) we'll tackle this question in the next answer immediately below.

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At last week's Raw(23rd Feb), Cody Rhodes had used his former tag team partner and co-champion, Crash Holly's (that's his name right?)finisher- The Alabama Slam. Is there any wrestler who has had used their former tag team partner's, NOT mentor's, finisher

Plenty.

Off the top of my head, however, I'm pretty sure that the most famous example of a performer adopting his former tag team partner's finishing maneuver simply has to be this guy:


Toldja' I lie, I cheat, and I *steal*.

Eddie Guerrero's legendary "Frog Splash" was actually inspired by his late, great tag team partner Art Barr, who had developed the move years earlier while teaming with the man who would go onto become "Latino Heat" as one half of Los Gringos Locos. Upon Barr's death, Eddie quietly addded the move to his own repertoire as a sort of homage to his fallen friend.

Other noteworthy examples? Edge's one-man Con-Chair-To, which was actually a variation of the two-man finishing maneuver he used to do while alongside his "brother," Christian. And in a similar vein, Chavo Guerrero's "Three Amigos" was likewise inspired by his Los Guerreros legacy (though if you wanna' get technical, Eddie was *both* a tag team partner *and* a mentor to his nephew).

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Whatever happen to Kid Kaos from XPW?

Click here to unlock the secrets of the universe.

Not trying to be a jerk (well ok, maybe a little) but seriously -- there are plenty of "objective fact"-checking sites out there (not to mention the esteemed Ask411 column) that are much better-suited to answer questions like this.

(More likely to be accurate, too).

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Why dont the IWC like XPW and CZW or liked and why didn't any of their roster make it to the big leagues?

Mainly because the heyday of "extreme" (read: ultraviolent) wrestling has long since come and gone. For the most part, your average 'rasslin fan doesn't mind seeing the occasional bloodbath or "garbage brawl" (provided the situation calls for it, that is). But beyond that? It's just violence for violence's sake -- and it makes a good chunk of the fanbase feel kinda' sleazy to have an active role in cheering on "fake" performers as they go out of their way to flat-out maim their own bodies under the thinly veiled guise of "entertainment."

There's a fine line between "acceptable violence" and "too much," and the deathmatch promotions pretty much tip the scales a little too far to one end of the spectrum for the mainstream 'rasslin fan. Couple that with the fact that a good lot of these "hardcore" performers willingly substitute gratuitous violence for actual wrestling ability -- and it's pretty clear to see why a precious few have actually managed to make it into the so-called "big leagues."

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IS DARREN YOUNG JOHN CENA IN BLACKFACE?

I've been wondering the same thing myself, actually.

(For what it's worth, we haven't actually seen both guys in the same place at the same time, ya' know...)

Race in the squared circle is a funny thing. Sometimes, a promotion plays it up to the point where it's downright offensive ('sup, Jive Soul Bro Slick?) -- but other times, professional wrestling does a really good job of blurring the lines between performer's races as the situation calls for it.


Rikishi? Totally Arabian.

Savio Vega? Pretty sure he was Japanese for a while in there. Ditto for Paul Diamond. And Darren Young? Dude, I honestly have no friggin' clue. But then again, perhaps I'm the worst guy to ask. For years, I was convinced that Taz(z) was black, too. And I MET THE GUY!

*(full disclosure: I'm still not entirely sure on that one, btw...)

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Whats the possibility of seeing Drew McIntrye vs R Truth vs Ezekiel Jackson for the IC title at Mania?

Honestly? I'm thinking "slim to none."

John Morrison still doesn't have himself a proper WrestleMania match, and he and Drew McIntyre have pretty much been going at it for the better part of the past few months, now. Zeke is a heel no matter how you slice it, and heel vs. heel matchups don't traditionally go so well -- especially when both guys are still pretty green. Sadly, throwing R-Truth into the mix would do very little to hide that.

So if I'm a betting man? I'd put smart odds on McIntyre tangling with JoMo for the IC gold one more time --on The Grandest Stage of Them All. It might not be Savage/Steamboat, but it'll go a long way in cementing one (or both) of these guys as Smackdown's rising star to watch.

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Can the winner of the Money In The Bank match cash in the briefcase that very night during Wrestlemania?

"Can" they? Yup. That possibility was even discussed this past Friday night on Smackdown!, as a matter of fact.

"WILL" they? Not likely -- for two major reasons, one being kayfabe-driven, and the second being a simple matter of "good business."

From a kayfabe standpoint:

In order to win the Money in the Bank briefcase, you will have had to compete in a high-impact ladder match against a whopping SEVEN other opponents. Literally, just shy of two hours (or so) before the main event of the evening. Even if you've got a superhuman healing ability (ala John Cena and/or Wolverine), it's pretty hard to think that you'll be in any (kayfabe) "top condition" to close out the night. Sure, the champ might have just eeked his way out of a likewise grueling contest -- but really now, are you going to play the odds that a main event singles' encounter took just as much out of the guy (or MORE) than your spotfest of a ladder match just a few scant hours prior?

I mean shoot -- yeah, you've had time to "heal" and all. But really... two hours? After a ladder match? Against seven other competitors, no less? Hardly seems like the advantage I'd want to squander when taking on a world champion -- tired or not.

The second reason is a simple matter of business:

WrestleMania is the blowoff show for a full year's worth of booking. The show pretty much sells itself on the name value and that promise alone, and it's really not the place to throw in a swerve for a swerve's sake simply to keep fans guessing. Heel and face turns are one thing (though they, too, are something of a WrestleMania rarity) -- but unannounced title bouts? That's another animal entirely. And it usually just ends up squandering would could have been a second, guaranteed payday *and* pissing your fanbase off in one fell swoop.


(See: WrestleMania IX)




Maria Kanellis - WWE got an early jump on their spring cleaning late last week by issuing releases to five performers. The biggest surprise among them? 2009 Diva of the Year, former Playboy cover girl, and upcoming "star" of The Celebrity Apprentice, Maria Kanellis.

Apparently, WWE was none too pleased that Maria had been casually telling folks in the mainstream media that she was considering a career after her time with WWE had drawn to a close. And even though she is liable to bring the company a boatload of free publicity by virtue of her upcoming appearance on NBC's Celebrity Apprentice program, WWE decided to cut their losses with Maria before she had the chance to turn right back around and do precisely the same thing back in their direction, a la Stacy Keibler (of "Dancing With the Stars" fame).

Of course, one can't help but notice something of a pattern in the fact that this sort of thing keeps happening to WWE time and again when they "loan" their performers out to outside, non-wrestling ventures. First The Rock, then Stacy Keibler, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Ashley Massaro (ha!), and now Maria Kanellis. In other words: if you continue letting your contracted stars dabble in non-wrestling ventures simply because it helps score you some free crossover publicity, then you're pretty much giving them the training wheels to explore life outside of the squared circle, now aren't you?

All that said, however -- Maria hasn't been doing much anything of note on WWE programming for a good, long while now. Though her upcoming appearance on The Celebrity Apprentice could have (and still may) scored WWE some freebie mainstream media exposure, the simple truth of the matter is that "outside venture success" typically results in one of two options. One? The crossover star receives a huge push to capitalize on their success. Two? The crossover star parts ways with the company and tries to capitalize on this success on their own merits.

Frankly, in spite of how entertaining and marketable she once may have been -- seeing Maria Kanellis released from World Wrestling Entertainment at this stage in her career is really the lesser of two evils, mainly because she just doesn't have the in-ring abilities to warrant a sustained push to the top of either of the company's already struggling women's divisions.

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Scott Armstrong - The second major surprise of the first round of 2010 roster cuts comes in the form of Referee Scott Armstrong, who was most recently playing the Earl Hebner role in Smackdown!'s latest incarnation of the Montreal Screwjob redux of just a few short months ago.

Word has it that Armstrong's release will allow him to continue working in the wrestling business, presumably in smaller outfits like the ones frequented by his father, Bullet Bob Armstrong, and brothers. And once again, while it is certainly sad to see the guy released -- the bottom line is that few (if any) fans actually pay to see one particular referee or another (well, at least since Pee Wee Anderson passed away -- rest in peace, little buddy). And when one works their way up to the top of the payscale in a job that is largely underappreciated? It's really only a matter of time before they're forced to seek their fortunes elsewhere.

Thankfully, it appears as if the Armstrong family will be ready and waiting to welcome the former WWE referee with open arms.

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Charlie Haas - In a minor surprise (if only because a good number of fans were literally "surprised" to discover that Charlie Haas did, in fact, still have a job with World Wrestling Entertainment as recently as one short week ago), former tag team champion Charlie Haas was once again handed his walking papers by WWE, making him the third in the latest batch of "future endeavors" most recently employed by World Wrestling Entertainment.

Haas has been used infrequently on WWE programming for the better part of a year now, and word has it that he was only re-signed to the company in the first place simply to keep him away from the TNA ranks. Additional rumors suggest that Haas had actually requested his release from WWE -- and was denied it -- several months ago on the same grounds. But it appears as if the onetime impressionist is now free to "cross the line" down to Orlando should it still be in the cards.

Long story short?

Charlie Haas was given repeated chances to get himself over, but the guy always seemed to struggle in the charisma department. Even when he was working the "impressionist" gimmick, few -- if any -- of his parodies were particularly impressive or inspired (heck, he pretty much just threw on a wig and said "look at me! I'm that guy!"), and so it's hard to blame anyone here for what was, in all honesty, a respectable effort in spite of an uphill battle. Presumably, Haas will transition to work as a trainer of some sort or find work on the independent circuit. Given his decorated ameteur wrestling background, a life away from the bright lights of World Wrestling Entertainment might actually be a better in the long run as Haas' career approaches what could well be its twilight.

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The Hurricane - The last two releases (well, "three" if you wanna' count Gregory Helms as a separate release than his costumed alter-ego) come as little surprise, as these two erstwhile ECW performers have pretty much been circling the proverbial drain for months, now.

First up? Gregory Helms, whose high-profile run-in with the law over a boneheaded public intoxication charge (and a narrow miss on an equally boneheaded "where's my doctor's note?" pill charge) pretty much sealed the deal that his days in WWE were numbered just a few short weeks ago. To his credit, Gregory Helms has managed to remain employed by WWE much longer than virtually all of his onetime WCW cohorts (at last check, he was the sole remaining active WWE performer to have been contracted with WCW on the day that it was purchased by Vince McMahon). But when it comes right down to it -- he too has struggled to maintain any serious momentum in recent years. And in truth? His serious neck injury and company-sponsored rehabilitation almost assuredly helped to save his job for a good, long while beyond the point where it would probably otherwise have come to an end.

Still, Gregory Helms is a talent, and he is well-connected within the professional wrestling business -- so odds are good that he will land on his feet, be that in TNA Wrestling or in various, smaller U.S. independent promotions. It'll be interesting to see what WWE does about retaining the rights to "The Hurricane" name, of course -- but MeeThinks Gregory Helms is probably more than prepared to bust out a similarly themed alias in order to make sure that the paychecks keep rolling in, if need be.

(Hey, if "The Boogeyman Nightcrawler" Marty Wright can do it, I mean...)

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Paul Burchill - The release of The Ripper was likewise inevitable, though it has managed to throw web fans into something of a fun little tizzy nonetheless.

Their main gripe?

Burchill was loaded with potential, and his first major gimmick (that of a Johnny Depp-inspired "pirate captain") was actually pretty entertaining. Had Vince McMahon actually seen the movie upon which the character was based -- Mr. Burchill could have just as easily been gainfully employed to this very day.

(The problem, of course, is that the "Pirates" franchise has already begun to collect some dust. And if Pirate Paul was still rocking the Johnny Depp act each and every week in spite of the franchise's obvious signs of staleness and aging? Odds are good that many of these same net fans who once so loved the schtick would probably have grown pretty tired it all, too).

Pop culture gimmicks are EXTREMELY difficult to pull off. RAW's guest hosts routinely catch flack for being "years past relevant," and the Captain Jack Sparrow bit certainly isn't getting any younger -- especially with Johnny Depp all set to star in yet another larger-than-life character role as The Mad Hatter in Tim Burton's upcoming Alice in Wonderland remake.

Simply put: the shelf life of the pirate gimmick was extremely limited. And if Burchill couldn't find a way to exude the necessary charisma, star quality, and "it" factor to get himself over in spite of his many attempts and years of employment thereafter -- then he really did end up amounting to "just another guy" in the long run. And in that case -- "talent and full of potential" though he may be -- he's really not all that much of a loss.

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Traci Brooks - It would appear as if Mrs. Frankie Kazarian and her newly unmasked husband are destined to remain worlds apart, as the original TNA Knockout was released by her employer late on Thursday afternoon, just two short weeks after her real-life spouse made his in-character onscreen return after having spent the better part of two years donning the guise of Suicide.

MeeThinks?

As much as I appreciate her work ethic and professionalism, there's just no getting past the fact that Traci hasn't done anything of relevance on TNA programming in years. Her ill-fated stint as TNA "Knockout Law" was best forgotten. Her time as an also-ran with the Main Event Mafia was even worse. And her Playboy appearance (which could have boosted both her stock and TNA's mainstream exposure) went almost entirely unnoticed once she was bumped from the pages of the print publication and relegated to an online subsite that few if any outside the typical lot of nudie mag fans even might have accidentally happened to see.

Fittingly, Traci's TNA career ends not with a bang, but a whimper -- and she now has the option to try her luck in the great big world outside of Total Nonstop Action. When it comes right down to it, this is probably for the best for all parties involved.

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Angelo Poffo - In a legitimately sad bit of news this week, former professional wrestler and International Championship Wrestling promoter Angelo Poffo has passed away at the age of 89. A decorated champion and pioneer of the industry in his own right, Poffo is perhaps most well known not only for his accomplishments inside of the squared circle, but rather by the two sons he introduced to the family business some years later: "Leapin" Lanny Poffo (aka "The Genius"), and "Macho Man" Randy Savage.

On behalf of the entire 411 staff, I hope you'll join in extending our condolences to the friends, family members and loved ones of the Poffo family.




Tweets are neat, but kayfabesbook is made of win. So let's see what's going on in the wild and wonderful world of pseudo-sport social media this week!

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Ooh... and since we're on the subject of social media:

Follow Mee on Twitter, where I muse on life, link to some pretty funny stuff, and say goofy crap like this:

things i *may* have drunkenly asked friends to do (since jan. 1): get a tattoo, make a sex tape, die in a fire. #TruthbombTuesday

Pure class, that guy.

And since I'm pimping offsite awesomeness, perhaps you'd consider checking out my brand new "literature of music" blog: your online home for needlessly introspective, lyrical analysis of some of the best popular songs ever written.

Click here to head on over to the Semi-Charmed Kinda Blog.

Finally, if you're a tweeting type -- check out the following links (just to piss off Michael Cole):

http://www.twitter.com/411wrestling
http://www.twitter.com/411moviestv
http://www.twitter.com/411music
http://www.twitter.com/411games
http://www.twitter.com/411mma



None - In a welcome development, there are no major injuries to discuss over the past seven days' time.



Awesome Kong - Former TNA Knockouts Champion and one half of the current TNA Knockouts Tag Team Champions Awesome Kong continues to find herself at the center of controversy with her current (former?) employer, as she has reportedly filed suit against fellow TNA employee Bubba the Love Sponge for what she believes to have been harassing phone calls and racially insensitive remarks that may have originated from his home. Kong's lawsuit comes on the heels of a well-documented backstage blowup between the two parties that was initiated by the shock jock's disparaging comments in the wake of the Haiti relief efforts.

MeeThinks?

Awesome Kong is clearly trying to do whatever she can do be done with TNA, and if the company knew what was good for them, they would quietly negotiate some sort of exit from the company in order to avoid making this matter any more volatile than it has already become. Kong certainly had a point at the outset ("quit being a jerk"), but she handled it in the absolute WORST way possible, and has since done absolutely nothing but throw more than a great deal of metaphorical gasoline on this already white-hot fire.

The message she's sending to TNA is clear:

Whether Bubba is actually stirring the pot (I suspect he is) or not, Kong is certainly not at a point where she is ready to "let it go" and agree to have bygones be bygones. As long as both employees remain on the TNA roster, this is pretty much a recipe for disaster (especially with other Hulk Hogan-related backstage drama continuing to build to a slow boil in the background) -- and so it's all but self evident as to what the company must do at this stage in the game.

Tell Kong to "let it go," or just come right out and let *Kong* go.

Twisting in the wind does neither side any favors, and it sends a terrible message to the remainder of the TNA lockerroom (and the wrestling business at large) that for all of the company's big talk about being so vastly different from the overly politicized and backstabbing environment of WWE, TNA Wrestling is really just as bad as their biggest competitor -- if not WORSE, as the inmates might just be the ones who are running the asylum.



As the WrestleMania card continues to take shape, and TNA prepares for their full-time jump to Monday nights starting on March 8, the landscape of both major promotions seems to be settling into something of a miniature "calm before the storm." Sure, there are matches being made, angles being advanced, and things taking shape on both sides of the aisle -- but the long and short of things is that both companies are in something of a holding pattern, for the time being.

In TNA --

The biggest major development also just so happens to be the company's worst-kept secret (well, that is, since the *other* worst-kept secret that they would, in fact, be making the permanent jump to Monday nights). But as for the latest "major development?" Hulk Hogan will indeed be returning to a TNA ring, and he'll be taking part in a tag-team match against none other than The Nature Boy Ric Flair, to boot.

Obviously, this will be a huge moment for TNA once the bout actually transpires on March 8. Hogan is in terrible shape, and Flair has no real business nor anything left to prove inside of a wrestling ring at this stage in his career. But in spite of these two legends' age (which is well over 100 when combined. Crazy, no?) -- there's no denying the fact that an "epic" (ha!) encounter between these two familiar faces on LIVE television will probably do more than a little to attract the casual fan on over to TNA's first official head-to-head clash with Monday Night RAW.

The question now, of course, will simply become one of once those fans have been lured in -- what can and what WILL TNA possibly be able to do in order to keep them hooked in the long haul?

Meanwhile, in WWE --

The card for WrestleMania 26 is all but set. As of this report, two major title matches have been inked, a legend will return to face the man who built the very company itself, a "streak" vs. "career" return match will round-out the main event offerings, six of the eight participants in this year's Money in the Bank ladder match have been confirmed, and remaining top-level performers such as Triple H and Sheamus, and CM Punk and Rey Mysterio seem all but destined to collide on The Grandest Stage of Them All.

In short?

WWE has set the table for their big dance -- now they're just kicking things into overdrive and amping up the suspense accordinglty. We'll have plenty more in the way of WrestleMania coverage and hype in the weeks to come, but the long and short of the matter is that we probably shouldn't expect to many more surprise onscreen developments to unfold up in Stamford now that WWE is approaching the home stretch on their famed Road to WrestleMania.

(Which, incidentally, is shaping up to be one of the strongest WrestleMania PPV cards in recent memory -- well, on paper, of course).


And With That, I'm Outta' Here

That'll do it for this week. Thanks again for reading, all, and I'll be back here in seven. Enjoy the weekend wherever it may take you, the week-before-Saint-Paddy's festivities wherever they may be (hey I'm Irish, we start early, ya' know)? And always stay positive.


- Meehan

The National Domestic Violence Hotline : [phone]-SAFE.