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Wrestling’s 4R’s Friday Edition 3.05.10: Raw and NXT Reviewed!
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By: Jeremy Thomas
Raw 03.01.10:
QUICK RESULTS:
Randy Orton d. Ted DiBiase [**]
Jack Swagger d. Santino Marella [DUD]
MVP d. Zack Ryder [¼ *]
Eve d. Alicia Kim, Maryse, Gail Kim, Jillian & Triple K [-*]
Show Miz d. D-Generation X [* ½]
WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE?: Raw kicked off with the Heartbreak Kid coming out to what was still largely a pop from the Oklahoma City crowd, but was admittedly a wee bit softer than he’s had since he started his pseudo-turn. We got a recap of the Elimination Chamber finale, complete with slow-motion and the whole nine yards, as well as a recap of Shawn and Taker’s promo from last week where Shawn agreed to put his career on the line. This was, as usual, a bang-up hype video. Shawn then got a mic but had to wait for the HBK chants to die down a bit before he started. He talked about how everyone in the back thought he was crazy for putting his career up against the Streak, and how no one could look him in the face or talk to him about it because they didn’t believe he could beat Taker. Shawn was as good as he always is here as he knocked this promo out of the park. He did it without throwing complex metaphors or pop culture references, no big words and no cheap heat or pops. He did it by selling the emotion in his voice and his expression; he did it with his subtle movements. Michaels made us believe him here because he believed it, at least in character. That’s why he’s one of the greatest.
Shawn then asked any of the doubters who dared to come out and face him; this brought down the Game. Shawn started to go off on him, and ‘H cut him off and said quite bluntly that he knew Shawn could do it. The H-Man talked Shawn up better than I think I’ve heard him promote anyone in years. Cue the Clique Conspiracy Comments, but the fact of the matter is, they needed to do this in order to keep the two from being potential feuders and distract from the Road to ‘Mania—and, of course, to set up the Main Event. ‘H said that he’d invoked their rematch clause for tonight and Shawn didn’t seem entirely into it. That brought out a comment about how you don’t have to defend the Tag Team Titles for thirty days, and that they would be able to toss a party the Monday after ‘Mania. You know, it’s nice to know they remember the thirty-day title defense requirement every now and then. Call me wacky, but that amused me. And this segment, I thought, was great. Shawn and ‘H do such a great job on the mic opposite each other, and this was a great example of that. It was a hot way to start the show and had the crowd eating out of the palm of their hands. Can’t ask for much more than that.
HOLY HELL, DID BATISTA JUST GIVE THAT PROMO?: I tried to think of a better title for this one, but that pretty much sums this whole thing up. I’ve given Big Dave a lot of crap over the last year-plus for his tendency to choke on the mic. He’s always rushed his words and usually stumbles over them. During his heel run, he’s gotten better and better. This…was the zenith. The whole thing started with Cena coming out and talking about what had happened, and how the Manimal had made things personal last week on Raw by beating him “until he couldn’t move.” He talked about going to ‘Mania and being in the main event with Dave for the Title, but how he needed to get some payback and wanted it now. That brought out Big Dave with a host of security, a bad-ass leather vest and the Title. Batista said the security was to protect Cena and not him, to which Cena had a snappy little comeback. That’s when Dave took over, and gave one the strongest promo that he’s ever given. He explained why he did what he did last week, and how they started out at the same time and how their rises to the top were identical, but they couldn’t be any more different. WrestleMania XXI was brought up, and then Dave said that despite them both taking the same paths, it was Cena who became chosen as the face of the WWE. I loved Dave’s justification here, and I thought it worked brilliantly into his character. Dave talked about how he just flat-out couldn’t stand Cena, and then Cena talked about how he worked his ass off but Dave couldn’t even be bothered to show up on time. What was Batista’s response? It was that Cena was right, he doesn’t care about them; he cares about winning championships and earning money. He mentioned Cena’s broken neck and Cena got pissed, then Dave cut him off and said that all Cena does is talk. He left Cena speechless. That’s right. Dave Freaking Batista left John Cena speechless. This was a brilliantly-plotted promo, delivered with more emotion and skill than Big Dave’s ever done. And Cena’s expression sold it all. Just brilliant work all around.
HALL OF FAME INDUCTION: MAD DOG VACHON: So, we’re starting to get into the lesser-known names to be inducted this year. Please, do not consider that to be a knock on Mad Dog. The man was one of the most notorious heels in the AWA who held that company’s world title five times, had some bad-ass feuds with Verne Gagne, and inspired the psychotic monster heel that we would see in people like Bruiser Brody among others. I’m happy to see him get a spot that he certainly deserves. That being said, it’s sad to realize that most casual fans don’t have the slightest idea of who he is, unless there is the off chance they remember Luna and heard JR and/or Lawler mention Mad Dog being her uncle. I would hope that inductions like these will encourage current WWE fans to look at the older product and check it out, so they would be able to appreciate wrestling’s history. I’m dreaming, I know…but let me dream.
BRET’S FAREWELL, INTERRUPTED: So, we had this moderately-hyped segment about Bret Hart’s farewell from the WWE…again. Seriously, there have been how many of these now? But when the announcement came, we had Vince McMahon come out to steal Bret’s thunder. He then took the opportunity to introduce Bret himself, and that brought Bret down to the ring while we got a recap of what had gone on up to this point. Vince tried to get Bret to clear his name about being involved in the accident, and Bret got in his face and told him to skedaddle. Vince almost did, before he came back and gave his props about being a World Champion liar. He said he wasn’t giving Bret the chance to say farewell. They sniped at each other a bit, then Vince went all awesomely psycho. I love his expressions when he gets all intense, it’s classic heel work. We went into the ‘Mania match, and Vince tried to say that Bret had come back to fight Vince. As Vince talked shit to Bret, we got this awesome image:
Some camera man deserves a freaking raise. Bret admitted he’s wanted to fight Vince for thirteen years, and Vince tried to goad Bret into a match at ‘Mania. Vince baited and taunted and then appealed to the fans. Bret continued to say no, and Vince called him a coward and kicked the crutches out from under him. Finally, the Hitman had had too much and agreed to the match. So next week, Vince said he would get himself a warm-up match and take on John Cena. The handicap stipulation, I expect, will be announced next week at the last moment. This was a nice way to build the feud, but I’m hoping they start to do something different then just give Bret farewell after farewell and go back to “You’re a liar” and “I screwed you.” The repetition makes for a moderate Right, made that way thanks to Bret and Vince’s deliveries.
RANDY ORTON vs. TED DIBIASE: So, one of the initial impressions here about this match is how solidly behind Orton the crowd has gotten. They popped pretty solidly for him—of course, they’ve been getting there for a while, but it definitely went up this time. Meanwhile, Ted was greeted with more or less indifference. The two men went out there and had…a match. And the lack of a description there has a point. It wasn’t a particularly good match, nor was it a terrible one either. It was just kind of there. Ted had his periods where he controlled Orton and did all right, though the offense was pretty basic and didn’t do much that gave fans a reason to buy into him as a guy who can hang with the main event, while Orton’s offense was good, but not fantastic either. He was doing the same mannerisms as usual, but this time the crowd was cheering for it. Before too long Cody came down to the ring and tried to distract Orton, which led to the newly face-turned Legend Killer tackling Cody that caused the bell to ring. I’m assuming it’s a DQ in Orton’s favor, though it’s possibly a no-contest since Orton attacked first. Afterward Priceless attacked Orton and beat him down, at least until he came back and fought them off. There was some noting how this made Legacy look useless against Orton, but I think this was needed to help solidify the face turn. If Orton had lost, he’d have taken a hit in his new turn. As it stands no one went over cleanly but Orton starts off strong. I’m sure Ted and Cody will get their heat back later.
STONERS IN THE BACK: So, we had Cheech and Chong guest hosting, and they started off hanging out backstage to where the Bellas showed up to do their usual job hanging out with the guest hosts and generally being useless. They pimped the “Get It Legal” tour and then the Bellas drug Cheech off so that Chong—who looks pretty good for a guy who’s lived life hard, I have to say—saw Hornswoggle and ate some Lucky Charms which may or may not have been laced with acid. Rob Simmons is readying his next Senatorial campaign commercial against Linda as we speak. We later found out that the drugs were actually sugar, and it was because Chong is diabetic. I actually thought this wasn’t bad, because it was about as subtle as the ‘E gets at doing double-entendre these days. I have to wonder why Regal let Chong play with his hair for that long, though. Anyway, the entire point of Cheech and Chong (outside of the guest hosting, of course) was for a Diva Pillow Fight. Yeeeah, okay. I love me some Cheech and Chong, but this was one of the most pointless guest host stints ever. They did nothing useful and were basically there to goof off backstage. I’m not complaining about the fact that they were kept to a minimum if they couldn’t handle more and the sugar trip was moderately amusing, but I would have liked to see more from these guys. Hell, they got less time than freakin’ JEWEL. That’s kind of sad.
D-GENERATION X vs. SHOW MIZ: Our main event was the match that got set up earlier in the night, with D-X reuniting to take on Show Miz. This could have been a really good match, but to be honest I wasn’t feeling it. They tried to rush this match a little bit because they had about six minutes by the time this was done, and they needed time for the finish. So instead of a great match, we got about two and a half, three minutes of what should have been a longer match that played into the Michaels/Taker feud, then allowed Sheamus to come back and brutalize ‘H. Some people mentioned how Sheamus’s lack of presence on last show and most of this one hurt him, but I don’t think so. Granted, I would have liked to see a little more than him wiping out the Game and saying nothing, but it set up the ‘Mania match and we all know why the feud is happening in a kayfabe reasoning. I’m giving this puRgatoRy because the feud building was all right, but the match was nothing at all to speak of and Show Miz didn’t get over by this one bit. That makes it middle of the road.
JACK SWAGGER vs. SANTINO MARELLA: Blink, and you would have missed this. This was a Money in the Bank qualifier match, and basically had Swagger killing Marella in seconds flat to qualify. Listen, I don’t have a lot to say here. I’m glad to see Swagger isn’t jobbing to Santino anymore, but you have to give fans a reason to CARE about him. This…wasn’t it. Flattening a comedy act in barely enough time for the bell to ring isn’t going to get someone over. This was functionally pointless, and giving Swagger more time to beat Santino around would have made for a better way to give him momentum. And for Christ’s sake, can we stop with the people pointing at the WrestleMania sign? It’s getting very old.
ZACK RYDER vs. MVP: You know what? I could almost put the Santino/Swagger comments here, with the exception that this match ad just a wee bit more quality. My biggest gripe here is the complete and utter jobbing of Ryder. Like him or not, he actually built a little something of credibility for himself on ECW. Tommy Dreamer tried to get him over, and actually succeeded somewhat. I’m not saying that Mr. Woo Woo Woo is ever going to be anything above a glorified lower midcarder, but he could at least be serviceable. Unless, of course, they decide to debut him on Raw in a forty-five second job to a guy who’s been the Miz’s bitch for weeks. Yeah, way to go, Creative.
DID YOU KNOW?: Nope. And, as always, I don’t care.
DIVA PILLOW FIGHT: This was the entire point of Cheech and Chong from a kayfabe standpoint. Yeah, wonderful. Cheech and Chong came down to the ring, with Tommy giving joint-smoking signals in place of high-fiving the fans. PG, right guys? They made a few stoner jokes and then introduced the Diva Pillow Fighters. Dude, really? REALLY? The outfits weren’t hot enough to make this worth it. Well, except Maryse’s and maybe Gail’s. This was six Divas trying to mix pillow fighting with actual wrestling. This was stupid to no end, it didn’t have any god damned purpose and basically amounted to the Divas trying to sell pillow shows and then do their finishes with the pillows tripping them up. Listen, I’m up for a little T&A as much as the next guy, but this was really silly. Oh, and of course we then had Hornswoggle trying to push his druggie cereal. And Vintage Cole and Jerry Lawler tried to fight over the cereal. Yeah, this was about three minutes, and was about two minutes and forty-five seconds too long. No thanks.
| The 411
This Raw was a couple great promos, one good one and a whole lot of nothing matches. On the Road to WrestleMania, we need good feuds built and I’m okay with that, but the amount of wasted time was not something I appreciated. We needed a pillow fight, really? Cheech and Chong were useless guest hosts and the Money in the Bank matches were jokes. I give this a middling rating based purely on the opening and Cena/Batista promo segments, which tells you just how great they were. SHOW RATING: 5.5 |
From Miz says REALLY?:
Edge vs. Jericho is a ‘first time ever on PPV’ one on one match, am I right?
One on one, yes. They have fought on Pay-Per-View before, most notably at SummerSlam 2004 in a Triple Threat match with Batista, but yes this is their first one-on-one Pay-Per-View match.
From Guest#2014:
“Spear” really has potential to be Jericho or Edge’s personal “What?”
From The Great Capt. Smooth:
If Edge can get “Spear!” to stick the way he got “You Suck!” to do so, I just hope he starts doing random shit. Something like a “Crappity Snappity!”. It makes no sense, but if anybody could get it over, it would be Edge.
From Cyrith:
Smackdown was a nice watch this week, but I have to echo Jeremy. Jericho keeps looking weak against Edge, and that is doing no one credit. I personally don’t understand why the had Edge hit the spear, I think a tease would have been more effective. They could have had Jericho get run off, have Edge stand tall and make people want to tune in to see “one more spear.” And god I hope that doesn’t become the “What” cheer. I still want to kick Stone Cold for starting that one.
I don’t really WANT “Spear” to become the new “What?” I don’t want a new “What” period. I could see it happening, though. And Smooth, I have to say…you always give some of my favorite comments. Crappity Snappity will be what’s on the sign of the next WWE show I go to, guaranteed.
From Heel:
I think its pretty clear that Morisson will be facing Miz and Show, with possibly R truth as partner at mania. Or Daniel Bryan as his partner. There is no way Morisson will be kept out of MITB otherwise. And i dun think they’ll have another qualifier for him to enter by.
Well, we know by now that you’re right about the Qualifier (or almost certainly so). And I could see Morrison & Truth facing Miz Show. It would probably be more of a pre-PPV match though; that’s where the Unified Tag Titles usually hang out.
By: Michael Bauer
NXT 03.02.10:
QUICK RESULTS:
Darren Young defeated David Otunga [**1/4]
Wade Barrett defeated Daniel Bryan [*3/4]
Matt Hardy and Justin Gabriel defeat William Regal and Skip Sheffield [**]
EXPLAINING THE RULES RIGHT AWAY: When you start a show by explaining the rules of a program after failing to do so the week before, this is an automatic right. Had they done this any time in Week 1, I think it would have just been lost in the shuffle, so this was a perfect move here. Also, the stipulation of not voting for or against your own rookie had to be done, without question.
DANIEL BRYAN’S SECOND MATCH: So after a “pep talk” from The Miz about fighting while injured, Daniel Bryan had his second match, facing Wade Barrett, who is Jericho’s rookie. The one thing I can say about this is that Jericho did play up Bryan’s past history more than I expected him too, which is nothing but goodness. Now, of course, Bryan should be the underdog against Barrett, but add in his rib injury and he was no match for the massive Barrett. The ending was a little weird, as it looks like Bryan did slip on the top rope, but it was all played off on his injury, which is exactly what needed to happen here. Bryan needed to lose this match and it had to be because of his ribs. The post match of Jericho locking in the Walls again was a nice touch towards Bryan being the main target of the pros and the main threat of the rookies, all in one.
HARDY AND REGAL TEAM WITH THEIR ROOKIES: The main event saw another pair of rookies and pros teaming up as Matt Hardy teamed with Justin Gabriel to face William Regal and Skip Sheffield. Now, this is a tough match to rate as the main story for this entire match was Regal screaming at Skip the whole time and it really took away from whatever was happening in the ring, literally. I had to count at least five times that Regal would stop attacking his opponent just to yell whatever to Sheffield. And of course, it was cost him as Matt Hardy hit a Twist of Fate and tagged in Justin Angel for a freaking 450 Splash. Now, just when you thought the Shooting Star Press was the only move to ever come back, we get this from an NXT rookie. I’m glad they showed three replays, because I didn’t believe it when I saw it. Also, how awesome was it to see something resembling Poetry in Motion again? So while tough to rate, the match was pretty good and gave us a look at the last two people we needed to.
PROMO VIDEOS AND ROOKIE HYPE: This week we saw the official NXT promo videos for Daniel Bryan, Wade Barrett, and Skip Sheffield. All three of them were tremendous in understanding each rookie and their mindsets heading into WWE NXT. Bryan was touted as the world traveling wrestler who has more experience than any other rookie and some of the pros. Wade got his promo about his bare knuckle fighting in Europe and his overall stature. Skip being labeled the Corn fed Meathead was interesting, as he is the typical redneck. But we also had video of Heath training with Christian and Christian telling Heath he is too cocky, in his own way. Also, we got the backstage work of Matt Hardy and Justin Gabriel, which showed another great dynamic team and hinted at what we would see in the main event. It was all simple and well executed, making me interested in these rookies, which is exactly what they need to do.
DARREN YOUNG’S REMATCH WITH DAVID OTUNGA: First off, while this was the best match on the card, the main reason this is purgatory is because of everything that happened in the last 30 seconds and afterwards. But I will get to that later. The match itself was tons better than last week, but that wasn’t hard to do anyway. This match felt like a way to get us to see Young do something and for Otunga to not be seen as a one move pony. And while that is all good, the ending made this match just feel really weird. I mean, if Punk really can’t stand his protégé, then why on earth would he help him win? But nonetheless he did and then Otunga shoved off R-Truth when he went to talk to him. Now, these two get along or at least we thought they did. Next thing we know, they are brawling backstage while a mouse crawls around. I’m glad it took more than one ref to break it up, but it still felt really forced. Overall, this match made me more confused than anything.
OVERALL ROOKIE/PRO RELATIONSHIPS: So we are through two weeks and while you know some combinations would feel off, it seems like there are more questions than answers about the dynamics of each team. Let’s look the teams:
WWE Pro R-Truth with NXT Rookie David “A-List” Otunga – Thought they got along, but brawled this week.
WWE Pro The Miz with NXT Rookie Daniel Bryan – No explanation needed.
WWE Pro Matt Hardy with NXT Rookie Justin Gabriel – Great teamwork.
WWE Pro Chris Jericho with NXT Rookie Wade Barrett – Seemingly great team, but with a load of ego.
WWE Pro William Regal with NXT Rookie Skip Sheffield – About as bad Charlie Haas and Rico started.
WWE Pro CM Punk with NXT Rookie Darren Young – Punk wants nothing to do with him, but helps him win?
WWE Pro Christian with NXT Rookie Heath Slater – Seemingly good team.
WWE Pro Carlito with NXT Rookie Michael Tarver – No clue based on week 1.
So yeah, I have no clue what to make of all this.
“THAT’S COOL.” “WHAT’S THAT?” “THAT’S NXT.”: So, we get out ending on Striker backstage with all the rookies not in the main event to close out the show, as he did last week. But in strolls Carlito to spit apple in Heath Slater’s face. No reasoning, no clue why, and the worst responses I’ve heard in some time. I can appreciate a cliffhanger, but this one made no sense at all.
NOTHING
| The 411
This was another very solid show from NXT. All of the matches were done well and we now have seen every rookie debut, with only Michael Tarver not being featured in some way this week. We also now have the rules, but I have no idea how exactly anyone could vote for anyone based on all the weird interactions. Still, we have 14 weeks left in this season to figure it out. SHOW RATING: 6.5 |
Until Monday, keep on kickin’ it!
~451~
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