The Wrestling 5 & 1 10.16.10: Velvet vs. Mickie

Welcome to this week’s edition of The Wrestling 5 & 1! Yes, I’m new here. You don’t know me. Well, 2 or 3 of you might hear the name “Greg DeMarco” and be familiar with it. If so, you’re a) a person living in Arizona who is b) an avid indy wrestling fan and c) spent a lot of time in crappy bars, armories and rec-centers. Who am I? We’ll get to that a little later in the column.

But I’m not why you came here, is it? Nope, this is!

What are we up to now, Version 3? The WWE finally released Matt Hardy on Friday, a moment we’ve all been—strike that. A moment Matt Hardy has been waiting for! Apparently Hardy’s efforts and videos were in fact attempts to get released, according to some of his statements on Twitter following his release. “It was harder for me to get released then it was to get hired!” To the WWE’s credit, they had this to say: “WWE has come to terms on the release of Matt Hardy, effective as of October 15, 2010. WWE wishes Matt Hardy the best in his future endeavors.” Which is all they ever have to say. It would have been funny (almost as funny as when they posted that great line at the start of Alberto Del Rio’s bio) if they made this statement instead: “WWE has come to terms on the release of Matt Hardy, effective as of October 15, 2010. WWE wishes Matt Hardy the best in his future endeavors…with TNA.” I’m being serious. That little addition would have done nothing at all to help TNA. But it would put the WWE in the “we know what’s going on, and we honestly don’t care” position–which is likely where they are anyway.

What happens to Matt? Well, a debut with TNA after 90 days is a given. According to Matt, he’s no longer “Fatt” Hardy and is back in great shape. In the meantime, I wonder if ROH will spring for Hardy again, as his last ROH appearances came when he was an internet darling, not an internet annoyance. I’d like to see him go to Japan where he can really reinvent himself, especially in the ring, and offer something new to TNA when he debuts. The best news for Hardy is that he’ll soon be back where he’s most comfortable…playing second fiddle to his brother Jeff (you know, the one who has 3 World Championships over Matt’s zero).

Okay, so I know what you’re thinking. Where are the girls? We came here for the girls! What happened to the girls?!

I’ve decided to discontinue the girls. Really. We don’t need them.

Seriously.

Okay fine. Bring on the girls!

Velvet Sky scored her third victory last week, edging out Gail Kim in what was a very close vote. She’s has had a few extra weeks of training, but her opponent is no stranger to posing (or implants). Velvet Sky goes for the Hall of Bang this week, but she’s got some stiff competition! Wait, that’s me. Regardless, she faces off with the newest TNA Knockout Mickie James in this week’s Vs!

You need more? Okay…

Hmm…Mickie…Velvet…

…Velvet…Mickie…

Remember, if Velvet is victorious, she joins Maryse in the Hall of Bang!

Decisions, decisions. Mill over it as you read the rest of the column, and at the end, vote!

CM Punk Traded To RAW: So, CM Punk gets traded to RAW, and all is right with the world? Not quite. The SES was dismantled over such a short period of time, it feels like Punk, Gallows and Serena were peaking yesterday. Now, Serena is gone, Gallows is in limbo and Punk’s on RAW. Punk shaved off the Jesus beard and went a little more violent, giving Evan Bourne a beat down that made Sheamus & Daniel Bryan jealous. It’s since come out that Bourne is out with surgery, so we’ll have to wait & see if the beat down was meant to actually do anything for Punk. Punk was traded in favor of Edge, who heads over to the blue brand. I think RAW won out in this one. Edge is (self-admittedly) at the tail end of his career, and hasn’t really done that much since making the jump back to RAW earlier in the year. Punk, on the other-hand, has had a breakout year in becoming what many (yours truly included) call the best all around performer in pro wrestling today. It’ll be interesting to see what Punk does moving forward. With Cena occupied, a power struggle over the leadership of Team RAW wouldn’t hurt. You know what else wouldn’t hurt? Let him be the third man in the booth on Smackdown, not Cole. Just sayin’.

What say we take a little break, eh?

Sheamus-Bryan II was the perfect follow-up to Sheamus-Bryan I

I especially loved how Sheamus kept looking at Bryan, surprised by how close to the limit he had to go to get the win. He was just shy of an outward show of respect. Too bad Michael Cole no sold the whole thing. Cole’s irrational Daniel Bryan hating aside, this made Sheamus’ beat-down of Daniel Bryan worth it. I’d almost love to see a third match where Daniel Bryan comes even closer to the win, ending with Sheamus actually showing Bryan that respect through a handshake. Then you can find a reason for The Miz (and A-Ri, I guess) to attack Sheamus, leading to Bryan making the save. There’s something that strikes me as entertaining about that potential pair.

Adam Pearce shoots from the hip about ROH:Just two weeks after he was fired as head booker for Ring of Honor, Adam Pearce sat down for a very candid interview with Pro Wrestling Illustrated’s Al Castle. And the politically savvy Pearce chose not to hold back, but serve up a great deal of insight into the inner workings of Ring of Honor, and the inside of the business in general. It’s a long read, but a good one–and I highly recommend it. One thing that really sticks out is the fact that despite being at the helm for just under two years, Pearce oversaw a period of tremendous change. ROH went from being a DVD based company with bi-monthly, pre-taped PPV events to having weekly TV and live internet-PPV events.

The current NWA World Heavyweight Champion didn’t hold back when asked what he saw as the problems with ROH. “I think that there are opportunities that Ring of Honor has had over the last two years, that I’ve seen with my own eyes, and doors that have gone unopened and things that are left on the table.” The most concerning example Pearce provides is the opportunities ROH had to expand their deal with HDNet, of course owned by Dot Com billionaire Mark Cuban. As a company that needs exposure more than any other thing, I can’t imagine how they could pass on those opportunities. Pearce also makes a great point when he postulates that ROH is stuck in 1998. “They’re a generation behind of where they should be … your wrestling is supposed to be this revolutionary product, but everything else isn’t.” Looking at both ROH’s reliance on DVD sales as it’s primary source of income, and the poor production levels they have associated with that source of income, Pearce is dead on in his evaluation of his former employer. Obviously some people in the company got tired of hearing about it.

A look around the universe from the Twitter perspective…

Chris Jericho (IAmJericho): “The one thing I dont understand about the UK….prawn crisps. Who in the hell would eat these things?!?”

Kevin Nash (REALKEVINNASH): “cut down trees today, not that big of a deal just something I never do. before anyone goes crazy not in the rain forest ,just my yard.”

Tyler Black aka FCW’s Seth Rollins (wwerollins): “Sometimes you lose to a cross body…”

Samoa Joe (samoajoe): “You know if Ignorance is Bliss I know some Jolly Mother%*$-ers ;)”

This was followed by…

Samoa Joe (samoajoe):“The last tweet was spawned over a argument over about what was better Van Halen or Van Hagar & a unnamed party brought up Crystal PEPSI”

After Thursday’s Impact, Randy Orton (randyorton) had a few things to share about what he saw:
“Checked out tna tonight for the 2nd time ever. Samoa Joe can move. Miss working with Angle and Jeff. Coulda done w/o the JWoW segment tho.”
“I enjoyed the backstage stuff for the most part anyway. Something about the realness of the conversations between some of the talent was really well done.”

I’m not 100% sure what’s more interesting about Orton’s comments…the fact that he openly praised portions of the product, the fact that he said nice things about TNA talents in Kurt Angle and Jeff Hardy…or the fact that he watches Impact! And it appears he watched more of the episode than many. Must have been a nice diversion in between the conversations he has with the voices in his head.

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TNA forms a super faction…again: Eric Bischoff: “Stop me if you’ve heard this before. We’ll make a group–” “Me: STOP!” Seriously? This is the best you can come up with? To me, this is just further proof that Eric Bischoff and Hulk Hogan have essentially contributed one thing to all of professional wrestling in the past 15 years…The nWo. Let’s see here, on Team Hogan we have Hulk Hogan, Eric Bischoff, Ric Flair, TNA World Champion Jeff Hardy, Abyss, Jeff Jarrett, TNA TV Champion AJ Styles, Matt Morgan, Kazarian, Douglas Williams and Beer Money–all in the same faction. What, Tommy Dreamer didn’t want any of that? You couldn’t turn Mick Foley heel? Really, TNA? Really? You’re better than this.

This is something that will likely come out in every column I write. I want to love TNA. The talent level they have is amazing. Just amazing. But the booking is completely mind boggling. I don’t know if any wrestling organization could do less with more. In the last set of Impact tapings, the X-Division and Tag Team championships were an afterthought. Actually, afterthought would have been an upgrade! I’m absolutely floored by this. And I’ve been continually floored by TNA over and over lately. Really since January, when “you know who” showed up. Not to say that it was perfect back then…far from it.

But the best part of Thursday’s Impact? Dixie Carter getting one past the goalie–swearing on air. Considering the increase of in-ring content on RAW & Smackdown this week, TNA picked a bad week to have less than 20 minutes of actual wrestling. Of course, we can expect more of the same since Impact went and scored a 1.4 rating. it’s highest since January. Maybe we’re all wrong and everyone not following on the internet really likes this stuff?

Diversion time!

Five Things You Didn’t Know About…ME!

Since I’m the en vogue answer to “Hey, who’s the new guy?” I figured I’d use this time to introduce myself. Here are five things you didn’t know about me (and possibly still didn’t know even if you already, you know, knew me).

1. I’m just a guy. A normal guy. I’m a family man, with a wife and two adorable kids. I’m also a very positive person. I usually see the glass half full. Half full and half awesome. Except if that glass is TNA. That glass has a hole in the bottom. It doesn’t matter how much awesome you pour in there, it just spills out of the bottom.

2. I can count my years watching wrestling by what WrestleMania it is. I started watching about 1 year before the first WrestleMania, mainly with my Dad on the MSG network. So while WrestleMania 26 was the real “25th Anniversary of WrestleMania,” it was actually my 26th year of watching wrestling.

3. I’ve been “in the business.” I started working in wrestling 4 years ago as a ring announcer. This job eventually included in-ring, on-stage and back-stage interviewing, play-by-play & color commentary, managing and becoming a heel figurehead, as well as behind the scenes roles such as webmaster, backstage production and member of the booking committee. I’ve worked with six different companies, ranging to your one-off indy show to one of the top promotions in North America. I’m not really that connected anymore, as I decided the time it takes to make inroads into the business isn’t worth the time away from the family.

4. I attend church regularly—a non-denominational rock-n-roll community church where I volunteer as the main lighting tech weekly–yet I’m pro choice. Go figure. But my political sharing ends there. I’m actually quite apolitical. I won’t be writing for 411Politics anytime soon, trust me.

5. I ran a short lived wrestling news website called Atomic Wrestling News this past spring. It lasted about 2 months. I even had a one month run with a radio show/podcast that featured such guests as Gabe Sapolsky, Austin “Consequences” Creed (or as the WWE calls him in FCW, Xavier Woods), the guy from Wildcat Belts, Online Onslaught’s own Rick Scaia, and some guy named Ari Berenstein (who?). It saw tremendous growth, and I was getting tons of great feedback from readers. Why did I shut it down? It was too much work. I don’t envy the major undertaking that Ashish & Larry take on each day. The webmaster-ing took away from what I enjoyed most, talking and writing about wrestling. Now, thanks to the aforementioned Ashish & Larry, I get to write about wrestling for a large audience. And possibly work with that Ari guy again.

And now…

Cause of death revealed for Luna Vachon & Lance Cade: Reports came out this week (same day, actually) of the cause of death for both Luna Vachon and Lance Cade. Both deaths were drug related. Which is sad. Very sad. The saddest part? No one’s surprised. Both died of an overdose. We all know it’s a huge problem in wrestling. Not just steroids, but pain killers, recreational drugs, alcohol, and more. You can’t blame the WWE, they really do go above and beyond everyone else. The only way this ever changes is if it comes from the wrestlers. The active wrestlers. I’m talking someone like John Cena or Triple H coming out and admitting that they used drugs, and the steps they’ve taken/they are taking to change their situation. Someone huge needs to admit they’ve done it, come 100% clean, and then make the necessary changes, be visibly changed, and still be successful. I don’t see how else it could change. And I know many of you are reading this and saying it’s not just wrestling. I know that. It’s all over sports, and it’s in entertainment, too. But this is a wrestling column. And it’s a problem in wrestling.

Well that was a downer…let’s see some ass!

This week’s And 1 girl is quite lonely. That’s because she’s in the Hall of Bang…all by herself!

And since I said “let’s see some ASS…”

And I’m spent! Thank you for reading my first edition of The Wrestling 5 & 1–it’s like Playboy, but you actually read the articles!. Vote for Mickie or Velvet, leave a comment, talk some wrestling, and feel free to shoot me an e-mail at [email protected]. It’s okay if you’re not nice, I can handle it–I’m a grown ass man! I’ll likely share the rudest—and maybe the nicest—comments or e-mails in next week’s edition.

Till next time… I hear voices cryin’! … I see Daniel Bryan!