411's Instant Analysis 01.16.12: Monday Night Raw
Posted by Chad Nevett on 01.16.2012
What did we think of Chris Jericho's first match since his return, Zack Ryder defending the US Title against Jack Swagger, Mick Foley trying to get a spot in the Royal Rumble and more? Check out 411's RAW Instant Analysis to find out!
Welcome to this week's Instant Analysis of Monday Night Raw. I'm your humble reviewer, Chad Nevett and it's week three of Chris Jericho back in the WWE. Will he talk tonight or will he find some new reason not to? And who will Funkasaurus kill tonight? And what sort of slasher flick hijinks will Kane, John Cena, and Zack Ryder get up to? Well, let's watch and see...
SEGMENT ONE: Mick Foley Wants in the Royal Rumble
Goddamn, Dolph Ziggler excelled in this segment. His verbal dissection of Mick Foley was both awkward and entertaining to watch. What made it work, beyond Ziggler's passion and strong delivery, is that he said unpopular truths. We all want to cheer for Foley and love him, but why does he deserve to take a spot in the Royal Rumble from active competitors? Ignoring the standard Rumble 'token veteran' spots, it does seem unfair for someone who isn't an active competitor to get a spot in a match where the winner gets a world title match at WrestleMania. In that way, CM Punk defending Foley seemed a little out of his character. It's like he had to defend Foley because Ziggler was against Foley. Once Punk came out, the whole thing went downhill. Ziggler's mic work was strong enough that this still started the show well.
Rating: 7.5 out of 10
SEGMENT TWO: WWE Tag Team Championship Match - Primo & Epico (C) vs. Air Boom Match Result: Primo pinned Evan Bourne Match Length: A little under two and a half minutes
I do love house show title changes. It always seems to be the tag titles that switch at house shows these days -- and even that's very infrequent. This rematch wasn't much of a match. Very high energy with no slow moments... but what else would you expect from a match that's less than two and a half minutes? When will Primo and Epico actually get a decent time to put on a show with someone?
Also: JERICHO IN A MATCH! TONIGHT! WHOO!
Rating: 5.5 out of 10
SEGMENT THREE: United States Championship Match - Zack Ryder (C) vs. Jack Swagger Match Result: Jack Swagger pinned Zack Ryder Match Length: A little under two and a half minutes
FINALLY: THE ALL-AMERICAN AMERICAN UNITED STATES CHAMPION! This was two and a half minutes of Jack Swagger beating the crap out of Zack Ryder by targeting his injured back. Ryder only got off, what, one offensive move? I could have done without him kicking out of that second Gutwrench Powerbomb since two is plenty when they're selling his injury as so bad he nearly forfeited the title. Still, I liked how they stuck with a simple story of Swagger attacking the back and winning without any difficulty. Not a great match, but a story you don't often see. Plus, the All-American American United States Champion! I've wanted to see that for a long time.
Rating: 7.0 out of 10
SEGMENT FOUR: Kelly Kelly & Alicia Fox vs. the Bella Twins Match Result: The faces won Match Length: A minute
The only entertaining part of this was Perez Hilton overselling being pushed by one of the Bella Twins. The rest was the usual crap except Alicia Fox didn't almost kill anyone.
Rating: 3.0 out of 10
SEGMENT FIVE: Over-the-Top-Rope Challenge Match Result: R-Truth eliminated Sheamus and the Miz to win Match Length: A little over four minutes
R-Truth and Wade Barrett's interactions was funny, but the Over-the-Top-Rope Challenge was a little stupid. A four man battle royal? I guess that's when battle royals get a little more exciting, but why not bring out some more guys and make it mean something? Like the winner gets to be #30 in the Royal Rumble. Remember when they actually did angles about the Rumble match? Remember when people cared when they entered? Ah well, the Rumble sells itself by this point, so why put in the effort, right? A harmless segment and match, just one that had the potential to be better and actually mean something.
Rating: 6.5 out of 10
SEGMENT SIX: Jack Swagger vs. John Cena Match Result: Didn't happen Match Length: I didn't hear no bell
And, now, the United States Champion looks like total crap. Bravo. A win where he had to hit his finisher three times on a guy apparently not cleared to wrestle wasn't enough apparently, he had to have his ass handed to him by John Cena!
I do kind of like how the treatment of Zack Ryder is what's driving John Cena towards heel behavior. The road to hell is paved with good intentions and all that, I guess? Also, Kane made the ring posts explode with fire and he wasn't even in the ring!
Rating: 4.5 out of 10
SEGMENT SEVEN: Brodus Clay vs. JTG Match Result: Brodus Clay squashed JTG Match Length: About a minute
That was just damn entertaining. The way that Brodus Clay mimics a dinosaur in his movements is great. Throw in some odd gyrations, fluid in-ring movements, and a post-match celebration that may have been longer than the match and I'm loving the Funkasaurus. How long until he's paired with Santino and made to feud with William Regal somehow? BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE AWESOME.
Rating: 7.5 out of 10
SEGMENT EIGHT: Daniel Bryan, Chris Jericho & CM Punk vs. Dolph Ziggler, Mark Henry & David Otunga Match Result:Mick Foley made David Otunga tap out John Laurinaitis reversed the result because Foley wasn't officially in the match Match Length: Around 14 and a half minutes
This was a disjointed affair. The Daniel Bryan promo was good. The big question about this match was what Chris Jericho would do. They built up Jericho getting into the match quite well and Jericho delivered by soaking up the crowd's cheers for 30 seconds, tagging himself out, and going to the back. A fantastic follow-up to what we've seen before. The ensuing match was a strange one with Bryan and Mark Henry taking themselves out and Mick Foley rushing the ring, claiming that he was put in the match by John Laurinaitis. That's where I tuned out. I don't mind Foley in an authoritative role or as a manger or a guest host or... whatever. But, I'm at the point where him in the ring actively detracts from matches. Judging from what happened at the end, this could just be the first step in a Foley/Laurinaitis feud, presumably, over the General Manager position. CM Punk's verbal beatdown was fantastic. Probably the best mic work he's done in many weeks. Just a rant that tore Johnny Ace down and helped lead to Laurinaitis just losing it.
Six-man tag matches are often disjointed and fragmented because they throw together a bunch of angles and this was no different. Ignore Foley's presence in the match itself and there wasn't really anything I didn't like about this whole thing. It advanced four stories that I could see and had some pretty good wrestling in there, too. What else can you ask for?
Rating: 9.0 out of 10
FINAL THOUGHTS
Segment of the Night: The six-man tag match
Trash Segment of the Night: The Divas tag match
Final Analysis: A solid episode. Some parts of the show seemed like missteps, like not developing the battle royal more and having Jack Swagger finally win the US Title while making him look like crap. What tonight did have right was mic work by Dolph Ziggler, CM Punk, Daniel Bryan, and John Laurinaitis. One of the best nights in recent memory as far as promos went, I think. Mick Foley's sudden presence in the CM Punk/John Laurinaitis story is something I don't mind, if it means that he and Laurinaitis will be feuding over the GM position. Foley in the ring isn't something I want to see at this point. Aside from that angle, there is a certain treading water as we head towards the Royal Rumble and I would like to see that result in some better matches. Again, a solid show overall, albeit a little fragmented and disjointed.
Verdict: 7.0
411 RATINGS SCALE:
0 - 0.9: Torture
1 - 1.9: Extremely Horrendous
2 - 2.9: Very Bad
3 - 3.9: Bad
4 - 4.9: Poor
5 - 5.9: Not So Good
6 - 6.9: Average
7 - 7.9: Good
8 - 8.9: Very Good
9 - 9.9: Amazing
10: Virtually Perfect
Foley in the ring in 2012 is just sad, on many levels.
I feel like this Jericho story isn't going the way they planned. People should be universally booing him by now, but he's still getting pops every week, so I get the vibe that his storyline is on a treadmill until fans start reacting the way they are supposed to.
Oh, and Funkasaurus is entertaining, sure, but I'm still waiting for my royalty checks - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bY6vPIaJDGA
SWAGGASAURUS~!
Posted By: The TradeMark Experience (Guest) on January 16, 2012 at 11:44 PM
they talked for almost 15 minutes and 4 matches under 3 minutes. but it was a great show. when tna does that is called junk and trash. at least they don't have gm changing outcomes of matches because he didn't like who won. john needs to go. he does not add anything to show, bring back hhh and maybe your rating would go back up now nfl is over.
Posted By: ginger (Guest) on January 16, 2012 at 11:57 PM
$1000 bucks says JustJoe still watches this so-called PG rating show.
Posted By: Guest#3346 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 12:01 AM
nice monday night raw. its no wonder WWE dominates Twitter..
Posted By: Guest#4067 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 12:09 AM
Did anyone notice the dude in the crowd with his pants down like at the end of the movie Teen Wolf? There is a chick at the end of Teen Wolf that has a gigantic camel toe. You all should check it out, but did you see the guy in the crowd on Raw with his pants down? I did. Check it out on TiVo because the dude is there on Raw with his pants down in the crowd.
Posted By: Teen Wolf Fan (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 12:17 AM
spot on.. great raw
Posted By: Johnny Ace (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 12:35 AM
Not bad considering its Thursday night and there is NFL on Saturday and I had to wash my ass on Wednesday. TNA>WWE
Posted By: Spencer JustJoe (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 01:20 AM
I wouldn't mind seeing a Foley vs Dolph match at WM. He's obviously not going to be involved in a WWE/World Title match and I don't see anyone else for him to face.
Posted By: Ryan Haseldine (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 01:40 AM
Went to the show all last minute tonite. Not bad. Not bad at all. Cali always has a solid show for you. Fuck east cost!
Posted By: Tool (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 01:54 AM
Nice Rocky V reference with the match length for Segment Six.
Posted By: chAd_b (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 01:54 AM
Somebody call my momma! Loving the Funkasaurus, nd Jericho's return.
Posted By: Guest#7393 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 02:00 AM
typical pro wwe review... this show was terrible...
barley any wrestling, bad promos, just a really boring show!
it felt like tna 2009... i guess it good if thats what their going for...
and whats the facination with this brotus clay guy...
he looks stupid, hes terrible in the ring...
wwe has no new ideas so the try and have a overweight waste of space try and mimic rikishi so he can become popular...
Posted By: Guest#6529 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 02:01 AM
"I feel like this Jericho story isn't going the way they planned. People should be universally booing him by now, but he's still getting pops every week, so I get the vibe that his storyline is on a treadmill until fans start reacting the way they are supposed to."
---
Nailed it. I can appreciate the creativity of the whole thing. Jericho has pulled it off well. But sometimes, everything can be executed right but still not work out as planned. This is one of those cases. The crowd is still popping for him and they aren't stopping until he gives them a reason to boo. It may be sooner than they want but it is time to move this onto the next phase.
Posted By: jm (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 02:21 AM
i am tired of the trolls coming to this site just to hate on WWE.
Posted By: Guest#9528 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 02:58 AM
I wouldn't mind seeing a Foley vs Dolph match at WM. He's obviously not going to be involved in a WWE/World Title match and I don't see anyone else for him to face.
Posted By: Ryan Haseldine (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 01:40 AM
Glad i am not the only one to realize this.
Posted By: Radtke (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 03:45 AM
Proud to say that I didn't watch the show; still, I have a strange inkling that if TNA presented this same type of show, per the review, where the woman's match was trash, the tag championship rematch was trash, your secondary champion was crushed in 3 minutes, a fat Flash Funk did nothing but "boogie" in the ring, and your top star was left throwing fits, all in the name of sticking up for his new butt buddy, this site would've trashed said show as the worst bit of wrestling programming ever brought to TV.
Hilarious
Posted By: scipio2009 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 05:44 AM
Guest 6529= troll. Clearly your an idiot because that was the best Raw in months. And CM Punk finally unleashed the pipe bomb again. Ill bet you 90% of the WWE universe did not realize that John Lauranitis was related to a Road Warrior. Jericho walking out was gold. I even sort of dug John Cena embracing the hate. Daniel Bryan is becoming a slimy heel and the crowd frigging knows it. Best thing they could do would be to have AJ become just as slimy as D Bryan. And thank god despite Daniel Bryan's heel turn Michael Cole has stayed consistent so far in his hatred for him. Dolph Ziggler is showing how good he really can be on the Mic.
As for Brodus Clay who cares who he imitates that's pro wrestling. You actually believe that Rikishi was completely original? If anything Rikishi and Brodus Clay "imitated" Dusty Rhodes.
So yeah this deserves a positive review you clown!
Posted By: jaimz (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 07:36 AM
Solid show, funny stuff, R-Truth gets better every week, Jericho doing autographs and photos was gold, Funk is on a roll but is Cena really turning heel finally?
Posted By: Smarky Smark (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 08:20 AM
Foley in the ring was actually cool to see, its called retro for a reason and im sure many marks marked out to a well executed DDT and the return of Mr. Socko
Posted By: A post Not From Spencer (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 08:23 AM
Foley did wonders for building the credibility of guys like Randy orton and Edge in the past. i'd like to see Foley put over Ziggler at Wrestlemania.
Posted By: Ian (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 09:24 AM
The thing about six man matches is that it's usually like that Sesame Street song, "One of these things is not like the others..."
There's always one guy put in who's far below the others and you can predict from the outset who's taking the pin. While this was slightly different with Foley coming in, it was still obvious Otunga was going to take the loss.
Jericho's behavior was predictable, as well. Once he started pandering, I knew he was going to tag one of the others and leave.
Posted By: Carl (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 09:43 AM
Nobody mentioned this, but I noticed Brodus Clay's tattoos looked a lot more faded. Like he already has started lazering it off. Compare to last week where his Tats were much darker.
Posted By: somebody call my lazer removal (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 09:52 AM
typical pro wwe review... this show was terrible...
barley any wrestling, bad promos, just a really boring show!
it felt like tna 2009... i guess it good if thats what their going for...
and whats the facination with this brotus clay guy...
he looks stupid, hes terrible in the ring...
wwe has no new ideas so the try and have a overweight waste of space try and mimic rikishi so he can become popular...
Posted By: Guest#6529 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 02:01 AM
You know nothing about wrestling, do you?
Posted By: Guest#8681 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 10:17 AM
"And, now, the United States Champion looks like total crap. Bravo. A win where he had to hit his finisher three times on a guy"
Ryder looks like crap anyway, and you guys had no problem with over wrestlers being made to look like crap in that fashion when ECW did it so don't change your opinions now
Posted By: Guest#0808 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 10:29 AM
And speaking of crap, the show looked it
Posted By: Guest#1186 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 10:30 AM
typical pro wwe review... this show was terrible...
barley any wrestling, bad promos, just a really boring show!
it felt like tna 2009... i guess it good if thats what their going for...
and whats the facination with this brotus clay guy...
he looks stupid, hes terrible in the ring...
wwe has no new ideas so the try and have a overweight waste of space try and mimic rikishi so he can become popular...
Posted By: Guest#6529 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 02:01 AM
I'm guessing you had to repeat fifth grade.
Posted By: Doh (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 10:41 AM
Foley did ok in the match, he was fast for what he normally does, the DDT was nice as well.
Posted By: asda (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 12:11 PM
This hatred for Cena isn't going away ever, why doesn't he and Zack Ryder just kiss and have babies..and just go away! Absolutely love Brodus Clays character, quite entertaining. Kinda a mix of several characters like the godfather mixed with a little Dusty Rhodes. Good idea for ratings wwe booking Jericho in the main event then just when you think that he is going to wrestle he pulls out..I say Bravo for whoever scripted that. Did anyone notice some REAL tension between Punk and Jericho. I think these guys may respect each other but I don't think they like one another...this will be good.
Posted By: Rodriquez (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 12:21 PM
Wow! Someone actually had the guts to write that Punk's mic work brought a segment down? according to this site, everytime Punk opens his mouth it's the greatest words ever spoken.
Will never ever get why people think because he had a few good months last year and one epic promo that he had the best 2011 of anyone.
Posted By: southsidesexy (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 12:27 PM
When the hell are they going to build up the Jericho/Punk match? I needs to start with the build now and needs to happen at Wrestlemania.. for the title, preferably!
Posted By: Dirty Dan (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 12:56 PM
'Did anyone notice the dude in the crowd with his pants down like at the end of the movie Teen Wolf? There is a chick at the end of Teen Wolf that has a gigantic camel toe. You all should check it out, but did you see the guy in the crowd on Raw with his pants down? I did. Check it out on TiVo because the dude is there on Raw with his pants down in the crowd.
Posted By: Teen Wolf Fan (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 12:17 AM'
Actually, at the end of Teen Wolf, there's a dude showing his dong in the bleachers.
Posted By: Lobo (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 01:08 PM
Jericho is getting predictable who didn't see him panderi g coming a mile away tonight
Posted By: Guest#3664 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 04:24 PM
Anyone else notice punk doing the Jericho stance in his entrance showing off the best in the world on his t shirt? Seems to me like that would make a cool visual in one of those awesome mania promo vids. Kinda like the Jericho michaels one to show their similarities.
Posted By: BadlyDrawnBenan (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 04:40 PM
"We all want to cheer for Foley and love him..."
Where I come from, you get bitch slapped for lies like that.
"A four man battle royal?"
They do that every year. They always have a mini-battle royal to get people pumped about the Rumble.
And why do they have Kane speak? He is supposed to be wrestling's version of Michael Myers. Silent, a monster and all ass-kicky. period.
I do not care for Brodus. However, for some reason, I simply love his finisher.
And I still think they should have had Johnny Ace strip Punk of the title and either fire or suspend him. Then, the Rumble winner would be champ. Could lead to some awesome story-lines and show Ace had a pair.
Not that anyone gives a crap what I think, I'm just avoiding work.
Posted By: Comment Board Poster (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 04:51 PM
Foley was fine in the match because he went over Otunga. No one gives a shit about Otunga. If Foley had pinned Ziggler there would have been real problems, but there is no issues with him going over Otunga.
Posted By: August (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 05:15 PM
Foley was fine in the match because he went over Otunga. No one gives a shit about Otunga. If Foley had pinned Ziggler there would have been real problems, but there is no issues with him going over Otunga.
Posted By: August (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 05:18 PM
"The only entertaining part of this was Perez Hilton overselling being pushed by one of the Bella Twins."
Perez stopping them from cheating and then saying "That's cheating, you're cheating!!" was pretty funny too.
Posted By: Guest#3497 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 05:40 PM
Nice review, although I would of given this episode of Raw at least a 9. It was that damn good!!!
Posted By: evlylanda (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 05:49 PM
they talked for almost 15 minutes and 4 matches under 3 minutes. but it was a great show. when tna does that is called junk and trash. at least they don't have gm changing outcomes of matches because he didn't like who won. john needs to go. he does not add anything to show, bring back hhh and maybe your rating would go back up now nfl is over.
Posted By: ginger (Guest) on January 16, 2012 at 11:57 PM
The reason it is called trash when TNA does it is because it usually the idiotic storylines possible being 'advanced'.
If TNA could find real quality and innovative storylines, opinions would be different.
As for Cena. Obviously Chad 'I hate CENA more then Hitler' Nevett once again missed the point. Swagger didn't look like crap at all, he looked like he got his ass handed to him by someone who is bigger than he is and completely enraged. Ya know...someone who may or may not be making a long awaited heel turn.
I enjoyed the beatdown of Swagger almost as much as I did Cena's matches with Angle and Umaga.
Perhaps, Mr. Nevett...you should undergo a proceedure to extricate your cranium from your rectum, and realise that Cena isn't the first born of Lucifer as you constantly intimate you believe him to be.
Posted By: Darth Mortis (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 06:19 PM
SWAGGERMANIA IS RUNNING WILD, BROTHER!!!
I for one, am very happy for him.
Posted By: Guest#7039 (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 07:57 PM
less talking more man on man!
Posted By: ginger (Guest) on January 18, 2012 at 01:23 PM
Did anyone notice some REAL tension between Punk and Jericho. I think these guys may respect each other but I don't think they like one another...this will be good.
Posted By: Rodriquez (Guest) on January 17, 2012 at 12:21 PM
Check out the look on jericho's face when Punk goes up to the top rope...that shit was priceless.
Posted By: mello yello enthusiast (Guest) on January 18, 2012 at 04:00 PM
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