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411’s Instant Analysis 04.27.12: WWE SmackDown

April 27, 2012 | Posted by Empire Of Ownage 411

Welcome to the SmackDown Instant Analysis! I’m your reviewer, Michael Ornelas, and before we kick this off, please check out the BRAND NEW EPISODE of my web series/local TV show “Shenanigans.”

Alright, now that you’ve seen that, here are my policies for this column:
-I do not watch or rate recaps or video packages (unless it’s an impending debut or return).
-My ratings reflect full segments and are not indicative of star ratings for matches.
-I tend to watch with a positive outlook.
-There will be no TNA bashing here.

We’re on the same page now, so let’s get to tonight’s WWE SmackDown!

SEGMENT ONE: Question & Answer Time with Daniel Bryan

Bryan was in great true heel form tonight, calling out the champion, referring to AJ as stupid, and showing his excellent refereeing from Monday night…and he still got the crowd to chant “yes!” along with him. Then Alberto Del Rio came out with Ricardo Rodriguez and we got some always fun “sí!” chants. Big Show got to shine too as he choke-slammed Ricardo in a fun, harmless opening segment that built the World Heavyweight Championship match at Extreme Rules as well as the main event title scene in general.

Rating: 8.0 out of 10

SEGMENT TWO: The Big Show vs. Alberto Del Rio/Cody Aftermath
Match Result: The Big Show beat Alberto Del Rio by disqualification
Match Length: Two minutes shown

I really enjoy Del Rio and Show as opponents because Show’s major moves are the Chokeslam and the KO Punch, while Alberto’s specialty is working the arm. Unfortunately, Rhodes vs. Show is the WWE’s priority in this segment, so we got less than two minutes for the match. The post-match made up for it though, as it previewed Extreme Rules for us with the appearance of a kendo stick, steel chair, and Cody’s leather belt. It also showed that Cody may be in over his head this Sunday.

Rating: 6.0 out of 10

SEGMENT THREE: Eve requires nametags

Too short to mean anything, but it’s just further degradation of Teddy Long in the storyline. I think Eve should use her power for larger deeds. Even if just slightly larger.

Rating: 4.5 out of 10

SEGMENT FOUR: Damien Sandow teaches us about the Age of Enlightenment

Sandow has me excited for his character as it’s a fresh take on a character type that hasn’t been done in wrestling in quite some time on a major stage. He debuts next week, and I hope that his ring work can keep up with his promo ability. I also pray that he’s good on the live mic, as you can have multiple takes in pre-tapes.

Rating: 7.0 out of 10

SEGMENT FIVE: Nikki Bella vs. Alicia Fox
Match Result: Brie Bella pinned Alicia Fox (Twin Magic winning for Nikki Bella)
Match Length: Two minutes

For a two minute Divas match, this actually wasn’t very sloppy. That doesn’t necessarily mean I was impressed, but I kind of was given those involved. It was still a two minute match though and didn’t really advance any story other than just giving the Divas champ a victory on TV.

Rating: 5.0 out of 10

SEGMENT SIX: A couple backstage segments

So first we have Titus O’Neil & Darren Young picking on Yoshi Tatsu before big Zeke came to back him up. The brash former-NXT rookies weren’t intimidated though, which is a good indicator for their start on the blue brand. It was a little wacky, but it gave the two newbies some character.

Then we had Teddy long dressed like a maid backstage with Aksana, Johnny Ace, and Eve. We had the inception of the Teddy table. Time will tell on that one, but I liked the People Power shirt, so that was cool I guess. Pretty sub-par segments though.

Rating: 4.0 out of 10

SEGMENT SEVEN: Titus O’Neil & Darren Young vs. Yoshi Tatsu & Ezekiel Jackson
Match Result: Titus O’Neil pinned Yoshi Tatsu
Match Length: Two minutes

This match was unfortunately more about the Teddy Table than it was the action in the ring. Teddy is not exactly the most exciting on commentary though. Young and O’Neil have definitely stepped their game up since getting called up from NXT and I’m hopeful that they’ll keep some momentum as long as they stay a tag team. Match was pretty good for how short it was, though.

Rating: 6.0 out of 10

SEGMENT EIGHT: Michael Cole interviews Randy Orton

I feel like we’ve heard everything here before, and then Jinder Mahal…I just can’t get behind him and really don’t want him escalating the card. Glad he got RKO’d. This didn’t do anything new to build to Extreme Rules.

Rating: 3.0 out of 10

SEGMENT NINE: Aksana introduces us to Antonio Cesaro
Match Result: Antonio Cesaro pinned Tyson Kidd
Match Length: One minute

Cesaro is going to be a major player in WWE someday if this debut is indicative of anything. Crisp with every move, a great background on the indies as Claudio Castagnoli, a squash over and an actual WWE talent as opposed to a jobber, SWISS DEATH, and a pretty cool finisher. As far as the post-match goes – poor Teddy, but pretty sweet deal for Antonio. Great debut for Cesaro.

Rating: 7.5 out of 10

SEGMENT TEN: The Great Khali vs. Cody Rhodes
Match Result: The Great Khali pinned Cody Rhodes
Match Length: Two minutes

Cody’s aggression made this match for me. Again, we got another short match, but fortunately these talents are making the most of their minutes. That said, Show should have gotten involved in some capacity. I know someone shouldn’t need an excuse for losing to someone of Khali’s size, but he’s so far down the card that it’s embarrassing. Good showing from Rhodes, but a poor result.

Rating: 3.5 out of 10

SEGMENT ELEVEN: Abraham Washington scouts backstage/Ryback vs. Jobby McSquasherton
Match Result: Ryback pinned Jacob Kaye
Match Length: One minute

Did anyone think Jacob Kaye had a chance at winning? Any hope was knocked on its head when Ryback’s sick clothesline did just that to Kaye. If they’re going to use Abraham Washington, I’d really like for him to find someone to manage sooner than later. I wouldn’t be opposed to a manager stable with Ryback as the centerpiece. I want to see what he does in longer matches, because I enjoy his squashes.

Rating: 5.0 out of 10

SEGMENT TWELVE: AJ’s instability

AJ and Daniel Bryan’s storyline has been the most enjoyable part of SmackDown to me personally for the past few months, and I really like this new direction they’re going with AJ. Maybe she’ll prove herself as not a pushover and Daniel will want her back. Or maybe she’ll get her retribution and screw over Bryan. Either way, I’m intrigued, and the stiff slap to Kaitlyn only furthered my interest in her character.

Rating: 8.0 out of 10

SEGMENT THIRTEEN: Sheamus vs. Mark Henry
Match Result: Sheamus pinned Mark Henry
Match Length: Seven and a half minutes shown

Finally! A match longer than two minutes! And both men worked hard, especially Sheamus, so we got a pretty fun match. It’s weird seeing Sheamus play the underdog, but it’s definitely appropriate against Mark Henry. They seem to be building Henry up again, which is good, because he fell way too far from where he was last year. I really enjoyed the ending of this match as well, as it further sold that Sheamus can hit the Brogue Kick from just about anywhere. The post-match promo on Daniel Bryan was “confident face champion” all the way, and it worked. I’m looking forward to that match more than I am Lesnar/Cena, so hopefully it gets some time this Sunday.

Rating: 7.0 out of 10

FINAL THOUGHTS

Segment of the Night: Question & Answer Time with Daniel Bryan

Trash Segment of the Night: Michael Cole interviews Randy Orton

Final Analysis: Tonight was not a great not for those tuning in and expecting good wrestling matches. The only match that exceeded two minutes was the main event. However, that doesn’t make this a bad show. The opening segment was very enjoyable, and several characters were developed. We also got a great debut from Antonio Cesaro tonight. They touched on all the blue brand’s matches at Extreme Rules, as they should have, and got me more interested in all of them. For a go home show, this was fine, but it’s nothing to go out of your way to see if you missed.

Verdict: 6.8

411 RATINGS SCALE:
0 – 0.9: Torture
1 – 1.9: Extremely Horrendous
2 – 2.9: Very Bad
3 – 3.9: Bad
4 – 4.9: Poor
5 – 5.9: Not So Good
6 – 6.9: Average
7 – 7.9: Good
8 – 8.9: Very Good
9 – 9.9: Amazing
10: Virtually Perfect