The 411Mania News-Center! 06.08.03
Posted by Jay Bower on 06.08.2003
New Member of Triple H Stable, Foley, HHH comics, Virgil's Mean, Wrestling Jokes, MLW, Goofball Sundays + more.
Hey there and welcome BACK to yet another edition of the 411Mania News-Center, the column that merrily regurgitates all of the weeks news along with just enough bizarre breakdowns to make you wonder what kind of drugs I am on. I'm Jay Bower and I'll lead the way.
I hope all of my fine readers are having a tremendous weekend thus far. It has been raining all weekend here in North Florida and each and every time that I have left the house I have ended up not slightly damp, not temperately sprinkled with precipitation, but looking and feeling as though I leaped in to a swimming pool fully dressed. It isn't fun friends, but though rumor has it that the 411Mania News-Center makes the ladies moist, I assure you I am bone dry as we forge ahead and in remarkably good spirits despite just receiving a $63 parking ticket from a sardonic police officer who informed me that not only is it sill illegal to park on a curb with my flashers on, but it only draws attention to my illegally parked vehicle. Go figure.
A big Jay Bower (or Jor'ge Bower for those of you reading in Espanol) thank you to those of you who have been following RantWars. Things are really starting to heat up and I endorse and support each of the remaining six contestants. Any one of them would make a great columnist here on 411Mania so continue reading, voting and helping us determine the first ever RantWars winner. The response has been incredible thus far and with a host of special guests slated to participate in the next few weeks, I think you should like what you see.
What a great week it has been to be a wrestling fan. In a time when WWE's product is inconsistent to put it nicely, both shows delivered huge this week. Watching Ric Flair shake, shout and strut around the ring while talking about his limo full of "women and booze" was possibly the greatest thing that I have ever seen with "The Nature Boy" tying it all up by promising to make Shawn Michaels his bitch. Christian and Chris Jericho are also stepping up big time on Raw and as those of you who read my weekly Raw Report know precisely how I feel about them. Over on the Smackdown! side of things, Kurt Angle's return was memorable though not overdone and the cruiserweight division was created with the kind of respect that traditionally is only given on foreign soil. Matt Hardy and Rey Mysterio proved themselves worthy of the main event slot, putting on a dramatic match with every bit the crowd heat of your typical television main event. Rey's title win was treated like a major event and the inclusion of his family only added to the segment. With the Ultimo Dragon on his way in and Billy Kidman on his way back, the division could really become a great draw, especially if WWE eliminated some dead weight and raided the TNA X-Division of two of three wrestlers to add to the cruiserweight division. The videos on Smackdown this week ranked amongst the best ever produced by World Wrestling Entertainment with the first showcasing the life of Freddie Blassie and the second heralding the comeback of Kurt Angle, portraying him as the amazing athlete that he is. It was a great week of WWE television and here's to hoping that they can keep it up.
"Jay, are you a Marxist?" shouts Bernard D. Smart.
No, why?
"Because you're STALIN and I'm ready to here some news!". Well then, off we go...
Bower's Bits:
According to The Pro-Wrestling Torch, Mark Jindrak will soon debut on Raw as the newest member of Triple H's Evolution stable. The former member of the Natural Born Thrillers has been polishing his game in Ohio Valley Wrestling since his contract was purchased when Vince McMahon purchased WCW. While few will argue that Jindrak's physique is awe-inspiring, his ring work and charisma have been a cause of concern. On the bright side, Jindrak should fit in well with Triple H.
Independent talent Orlando Johnson will apparently be the next man called up to the Smackdown! roster. The large, African-American wrestler who has also gone by the name Orlando Jordan has been training in Ohio Valley Wrestling and is a regular sparring partner of The Rock. In a recent interview, Jim Ross put him over as a sleeper prospect who the company is expecting huge things out of. For those wondering what to expect, in the newest edition of the Wrestling Observer Newsletter, Dave Meltzer refers to Johnson as the worst male worker in OVW. Bring on the rain.
Mick Foley is now all but confirmed to return to Raw this week to announce his involvement with Triple H and Kevin Nash's upcoming Hell in a Cell match at Bad Blood, a pay-per-view that is looking to feature a little bit of blood and a whole lot of bad. The deal for Foley is said to be extremely short term in nature with Foley appearing twice in exchange for on-air promotion of his soon-to-be-released novel "Tietam Brown". Vince McMahon was seen writing "Tietam Brown" down in his log of future minority gimmicks alongside "The Rapper", "Gangsta Jamal", "Streetz Darkie" and of course "Saba Simba".
In one of the most terrifying bits of news that I have ever heard, the Vince McMahon/Mr.America lie detector segment on Smackdown two weeks ago saw what will probably go down as the biggest per-segment growth in ten years. Viewership grew by a remarkable 1.6 million homes during the segment as Mr. America was hooked to the device. I'll admit to being horribly entertained by the segment, but these numbers are probably sending a dreadful signal to WWE officials. (The Wrestling Observer Newsletter, Subscribe at Wrestlingobserver.com)
World Wrestling Entertainment was said to be extremely indecisive in announcing the card for the Insurrextion UK-only pay-per-view. After changing the line up several times and having the entire card pulled from the website days before the event, no one quite knew how the show would unravel. At press time, the main event was looking to be Jackie vs. Rosie in a "White Boy Challenge", but that too has just been pulled from the website. More as it develops.
Then & Now: Close Encounters with Virgil...
Recently, a 411Mania News-Center reader by the name of Melbert attended the Wizard World East convention, an enormous event that features meet-and-greets with professional wrestlers, celebrities of the comic book world and others. Personally, I don't really understand the comic culture, but the name "Wizard World" rang a bell for some reason. After a little search through my hard drive, I found that I printed a report from the event last year as well. The report read as follows:
"So I was wandering around Wizard World Chicago (a giant comic book convention) yesterday when I stumbled upon a table sitting underneath a banner which read, 'WWF Superstar Virgil.' No one was at Virgil's table, so I figured I would go talk to him. He was a nice enough guy, but all he wanted to do was sell me a $20 autographed photo, which makes sense 'cause that's what he was there for. Never really having the desire to own an autographed Virgil photo I tried to make some excuses, but he kept insisting. Eventually he called me a 'chicken' for not wanting his picture (which I didn't really understand). So things were a little awkward, and I didn't know what else to say, so I pointed to a picture of him, Ted Dibiase and Andre the Giant on the table, and in reference to Andre said, 'so he was pretty big, huh?' Of course it was a stupid question, so he answered it appropriately by saying, 'yeah, he was HUGE,' in a tone like I was an idiot..."
- Mitch McIntyre
So, imagine my surprise and amusement when I discovered that of all the big name celebrities at the convention, Virgil and his unusual behavior were once again one of the focal points of this years report. I'll hand it over to Melbert to further explain:
"I got to the show and looked through the program and was surprised to see Mike Jones aka. Virgil, Vincent, Curly Bill appearing in the signing area! I was actually pretty excited because this guy has been around since the Rock and Wrestling days and been in both companies during their initial booms. I walked up and there was a huge crowd... but not for Virgil, they were waiting to see Smallville's Allison Mack (and with reason, she is bangin') Also he was right next to Comic Book Aritst Art Ross (Marvels, Kingdom Come, etc.) so he wasn't getting too much attention... actually there was nobody talking to him or even looking at him while I stood around for about 5 minutes watching.
I went up feeling a little bad and wanted to talk to the guy a bit letting him know he had a fan. Then he opened his mouth and it went down hill. He was very profane, rude, and ignorant with little kids right in front of him (curse like a sailor on your own or in front of adults but not 5 year olds). I asked if he was touring Indy's and he kind of laughed as if he was too "big" for that. He said he is in New Japan and kept referring to them as "Japs" and something about how they are tough guys and he is huge over there. Anytime I tried to ask anything else, he ignored me and blew me off. He was selling 15 year old pictures of him in the WWF with Dibiase for $20 an autograph. NOBODY was around him at all and he wouldn't even talk with a fan a bit. So I left the jack off to see Joe Quesada do a Q&A Panel.
I was passing by his area when the booth next to him was occupied, by RAVEN! I've always been a big fan and went up to chat since he also is a comic book guy (he had his Tangled Web of Spider-Man issue to sign along with pictures). He was very cool and willing to chat as long as there wasn't a line. He talked up TNA and what not. There was a line so I didn't get to ask him a lot of what I wanted. But he was very cool and e shot the shit about comics a little.
I also caught the end of the Austin signing and he was also a very nice guy and was really appreciative of his fans.... I was considering making a wife beater crack but they are very very large men. Its one thing seeing them on TV, but in person they are like me except 3 times bigger in every dimension. Makes me think maybe I couldn't kick Jeff Hardy's ass because he may be bigger than he looks on TV.
That night I went to a WWWA event and saw some fat old Indy guys from the area I guess along with some old WWF and WCW guys. The highlight was seeing SuperFly Snuka! He came out and was mobbed by these little kids who were just so happy to be near the guy and he looked genuinely happy to be there. I also saw Nikolai Volkoff and almost died when he sang God Bless America... I was hoping for the Russian national anthem, but take what you can get. Barbarian was in the main event and lost to their guy in a cool brawl all over the gym, and Larry Zybysko was there too. I hate the guy, hate his announcing and think he's terrible. But he was a really cool guy and dressed like a dad out of the ring. Khakis and polo shirt. We were making jokes about him after the show when he came up and was getting the free left over hot dogs. (guess its been a while since he ate) We almost went up to ask "Mr. Nabisco" for his autograph... but would have laughed before we could.
All around just a cool experience with wrestling for the day!"
Melbert : tiburonprime@yahoo.com
There you have it, one year later Virgil is still a douche!
The Wrestling Joke Book:
Q: How can you tell that Triple H has been attending your high school?
A: The most popular 8th graders keep getting sent back to third grade.
___________
Q: Why does the toll-bridge that the Undertaker invested in do such poor business?
A: Because he's the only one who ever goes over.
___________
Q: How can you tell if Jeff Hardy has visited your pre-school?
A: Arm-hairs on the crayons.
___________
Q: How can you tell if Triple H is running your local cemetery?
A: The families of the dead are being buried too.
___________
Q: How can you tell if Kevin Nash borrowed your car?
A: Your heat is out.
___________
Q: How can you tell if Strike Force (Rick Martel & Tito Santana) shop at your Grocery Store?
A: The tortillas smell like arrogance.
___________
Q: How can you tell if Mike Awesome has been rummaging through your drawers?
A: Your SuperCuts coupons are missing.
___________
Q: How can you tell if Koko B. Ware and his pet bird Frankie have been in your house?
A: Your birdseed is eaten.
Q: How can you tell if just Koko B. Ware has been in your house?
A: Your birdseed is eaten.
___________
Q: Why are APA action figures always in the discount bin.
A: Because they don't sell.
___________
Well, now that I'm thoroughly covered in tomatoes we'll close up the joke book for the week. Do YOU think that you have a better wrestling related joke? Send it my way and I'll print the best ones next week. They don't have to be particularly witty or logical, as long as it makes me laugh I'll probably include it. That's JayBower242@aol.com, send away wiseguys.
Major League Wrestling: Worth Giving a Shot.
The year was 1995 and I was but a confused, acne faced high school freshman. Though a lifelong fan of wrestling, my interest in the sport was at an all time low as I had home football game blowouts, miserable school dances and awkward pubescence distracting me from how dull the standard hero-and-villain formula had become.
Then, late one Saturday evening by pure chance I awoke and glanced up at my still-running television set. Wiping the sleep from my eyes, I saw Eastern Championship Wrestling on Florida's Sunshine Network. I had heard of the promotion only through a few minor mentions in black and white grocery aisle magazines but I had no idea what I was in store for.
I sat in awe for the next fifty minutes despite the fact that the wrestling was being broadcast at 2am. I saw a maniac named Sabu, adorned in baggy yellow pants flying through the air with the kind of reckless abandon that didn't exist in any mainstream wrestling of the day. I saw the crowd rallying behind the Public Enemy who would put their opponents through folding tables only after being themselves hung upside down from the arena balcony. I saw 911 deliver an enormous chokeslam to Santa Clause, Tommy Cairo and Tommy Dreamer caning each other bloody and eight different replays of Chris Benoit breaking Sabu's neck. I saw a young man named Joey Styles outcall entire WWF and WCW announce teams by himself and I saw the most vocal and interactive wrestling crowd that I had ever seen. Unlike any given Monday or Saturday evening on cable, I saw a roster of young men giving their matches everything that they had in contests which, despite being scripted, were the purest displays of athleticism. What I was witnessing was underground, raw, unpolished and unlike anything that American wrestling fans like myself had been conditioned to see. While the WWF was giving us third rate celebrities and WCW was hitting all time lows with Dave Sullivan and the Dungeon of Doom, a group of radicals in Philadelphia were creating a revolution that may have very well saved American wrestling.
For the next year, I would either stay awake until 2, 3 or sometimes even 4am on whatever rotating night of the week The Sunshine Network decided to play the program. With little rhyme or reason, ECW was fair game to be broadcasted at any time when at least 98% of the sane population would be sleeping, so each night before bed I set my video and let it record all night long. Most mornings, I would come up with a rodeo or infomercials. However, that one morning a week that I would discover a new episode of ECW made it all worth it. I continued to follow the promotion through it's "Extreme" transition, pay-per-view break through and cable deal. When the promotion folded, it was but a shell of it's former self. Though still a very good promotion, the revolutionary feel had passed in part due to Vince McMahon and Eric Bischoff cherry picking the roster and stealing Paul Heyman's ideas. The death of ECW was almost a happy passing as everyone saw it coming and was well prepared for the news. Now, three years later, most of this generations fans still fondly look back on ECW as one of their favorite memories of the wrestling boom and it will always be remembered as being well ahead of its time.
Last evening, I came home early. I did a load of laundry, cooked some dinner and crashed on the couch at about midnight watching old wrestling reruns on the Sunshine Network. This week's featured match was a "Memphis Classic" between Jerry Lawler and Terry Funk, a bout no mind numbingly dull that it put me to sleep within five minutes. About fifteen minutes later the phone rang, startling me as I popped out of bed. When I looked at the television, I saw Joey Styles in front of a company logo with a shaky handheld recording his thoughts on a big card June 20th in Lauderdale. "What the hell is this?", I thought to myself.
For the next fifty minutes, I astutely watched Major League Wrestling's "Underground TV". I'm too lazy to go down to Comcast and rent a cable box so I don't see TNA. I have never ordered a Ring of Honor video and my knowledge of Indies is limited at best. With that said, Major League Wrestling blew me away, perhaps because of the fact that I was unaware that it even existed.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that MLW is a revolution in a way that ECW was for me the first time I saw it. Major League Wrestling is in fact very, very inspired by ECW from Joey Styles talking in front of the large company logo to production, camera work and overall feel. However, the company is putting out an extremely impressive product.
Billed as "Hybrid Wrestling", Major League Wrestling combines elements of the Lucha, Hardcore, Puroresu, Shoot, Mixed Martial and traditional wrestling styles with the results being a very exciting product. On the companies official website, Joey Styles says the following:
"Since ECW went bankrupt in early 2001, there has not been a hard-hitting and edgy professional wrestling product on television. For whatever reason, even approaching WrestleMania, fans are tuning out WWE in droves. MLW hopes to be the alternative those dissatisfied and disenfranchised fans are looking for. Short on soap-opera storylines and long on real in-ring action, Major League Wrestling (MLW) will demonstrate the difference between "professional wrestling" and "sports entertainment" I am very excited about calling the action for MLW Underground.
Major League Wrestling will recruit and promote talent based solely on work rate and marketability. The "friends and family" plan which led to the demise of so many other wrestling companies throughout the years will not apply in MLW. Locker room "politicians" will be quickly impeached and dispatched in favor of mature professional team players. I expect MLW to be a breath of fresh air for myself, the wrestling fans and wrestlers who are business minded enough to see what we are trying to accomplish.
- Joey Styles
The roster is relatively deep for such a young company with the major names being Mike Awesome, Steve Corino, Terry Funk, Christopher Daniels, Jerry Lynn, Sabu, Super Crazy, Fuego Guerrero (Amazing Red), Taio Kea, Ikuto Hidaka, Paul London, Los Maximos (who are absolutely crazy), La Parka, Raven, Michael Shane, Kenzo Suzuki, Masato Tanaka, CW Anderson and Simon Diamond. The companies current champion is Satoshi Kojima who Justin Baisden tells me is one of the better workers in Japan.
Angles are simple though effective in the company and their weekly television is already just as professional as any other Indy that I have ever seen. Based out of Florida, crowds are still relatively small and the lighting on the shows that I have seen can use some work, but with enough exposure I can see MLW filling a nice void for lovelorn ECW fans trying to cope with the loss of their company. Thankfully, the "extreme" element that bogged ECW down in it's latter days has been replaced for the most part by a focus on great wrestling and I would recommend this promotion to anyone with a satellite or the Sunshine Network.
For more information, check out MLW.com.
Credit: Insomnia
A Plug, A Plug, My Kingcone for a Plug:
Does something about today seem a little SPECIAL to you? A little DIFFERENT? As though perhaps you may be forgetting the birthday of the internet's favorite puro expert? That's right, Justin Baisden is celebrating a birthday!
"Heavens Jay, I want to do something special for Justin, but I don't know what?..*COUGH*".
What's that I hear? A cough? Why, that's a classic symptom of NeedSomePuroItis. The remedy? ONE BILLION videos from RollingGermans. Great Prices, high quality, speedy delivery, what more can you ask for. Tell Justin that Jay sent you, maybe he'll forgive me for the picture of the nude, saggy crotched old woman that I put in his mailbox disguised as a picture of my new girlfriend yesterday. Justin got me with a similar though more elaborate gag earlier in the year so consider the score now 1-1. That's RollingGermans.8m.com.
What the? Who the? How the? My former Smarks supervisor --or as I like to call him, Dad -- Scott Keith is now doing NWA:TNA rants for 411Mania. You can check them bad som'bitches out right here Fabrice. It seems as though the TNA spot has driven many unfortunate writers to there knees thus far so best of luck. If anyone can do it though, it's Dad!
Jeremy Borash is fucking hilarious. His column, titled "From the Inside" hardly even touches on the inside happenings within the company and usually consist of Borash ranting and raving about just about everything. This week, he discusses Greg Gagne's classic AWA rap ("I'm Greg Gagne… and I'm in a rage… I want Brody… and I want him in a cage"), how much he hates his phone, "cutting a promo" about his laptop computer on Allan Funk's answering machine and a host of other just off the wall commentary. Only on the 411newsboard...well, I guess it *does* appear other places, but it's not like anyone ever goes to them. It's like the tree falling in the empty forest.
Chris "Don't call be David but that wonderful human being does deserve to go out on top" Robinson checks in with a new edition of Midcard Madness, breaking down WWE Bad Blood, a show that will likely feature a little bit of blood and a whole lot of bad. Check him out shorty, it's your birthday.
Ma'-main-man Daniels puts the HOT in The Weekend Hotline as always on Saturday. I'm sure you have already read it though as Daniels = Hits = Money = Biiiiittttchhhhhazzzz. (Widro nods as a trio of Caribbean broads help him fix my code). Big thanks to Daniels for guest starring in RantWars - Week 4 as well. Good people he is.
THE WRESTLING ORATORYsuckkkkkkka! If you haven't checked out the Oratory by now after months of plugs, congratulations friends, there is something clinically wrong with you. With great wrestling columns, weekly Raw and Smackdown reviews from myself, John, Drq and a ton of other stellar writers and brand spanking new forums, you are doing yourself a disservice. Go, go now.
Ryderfakin.com has arrived and you might just want to bookmark it. Notice the pretty graphic on the main page. It looks almost Bowerific. I bet a handsome, handsome man made that graphic. Yes sir.
Goofball Sundays III: The Final Word
For the last two weeks, you have been taken on a journey through time and space with arguably the weirdest person to ever appear in my mailbox, Peter "Long" Deeter. Peter thinks that Ken has been plagiarizing all of his fine columns from German websites and has been pestering me with over a dozen long, neurotic emails over the period of the last three weeks. Though each message was increasingly strange in context, Peter outdid himself with his latest manifesto titled "Evidence For All, The Final Word is Mine". Sent to virtually the entire wrestling staff at 411Mania, the strange email reads as follows with no modifications. I told Peter he could have the final word so this is the last you will hear of this episode as frankly space in America's favorite Internet Wrestling Column is far too valuable to continue devoting to it. I invite you to come to your own conclusions on the matter:
EVIDENCE FOR YOU ALL. THE FINAL WORD IS MINE!!
The great time of reckoning has arrived, the evidence I have gathered is faultless and it will lead to the glorious up rising of wrestling fans everywhere and bring us closer together than ever before.
Firstly let me say that it is with a heavy heart that I did this. I did not take on this job easily but came to the conclusion that for the best of wrestling and for I believe the greater of every man, woman and child wrestling should be kept pure and this great sport of ours truly is the sport of the gods. After this there is no doubt I will have a chorus of supporters and the removal of Jay and Ken, even the repercussions so great it will rock 411 to its very heart, its all for the best of wrestling, for all the best of human kind!
For those who don't know what's going on - and I'm not surprised as Jay and Ken have been running ever since I have started my investigation - here is the case.
CASE: That Jay and Ken should be removed from 411 on the grounds of plagiarism, deceit and lies. For perverting the course of honor and truth in the sport of wrestling.
I will now deliver the proof I have gathered over the weeks of hard, long work.
EVIDENCE STREAM ONE:
Proof: Ken Anderson plagiarized another wrestling site without giving proper credit and passed it off as his own. This is the incident that led me on my crusade of truth and it is a mighty damning one. The mass transit incident article was first published on a site that I have already provided the link for. It was from there that Ken has copied sometimes word for word, sentence structure for sentence structure and has not given credit. As a true wrestling fan I absorb every piece of information on the page of every article I read and there was NO date. After informing Ken of his crime and demanding his resignation I returned to the site to find A DATE had been placed on the web site! Lets look at this logically. There is no date, Ken is informed of the site that his crime has been found out, there is then a date on the site. The actions are obvious. In a panic Ken has obviously hacked the site and placed a date on the site, but he has been too late. I am the master of wrestling sites and know all of them inside out. Ken I understand your actions, you panicked and tried to run, but you were out smarted by me. EVIDENCE STREAM CLOSED.
EVIDENCE STREAM TWO:
Proof: After informing Jay of his brothers actions I realized that he too was in on the scam. Firstly I would seriously doubt the authenticity of Ken and Jays actual status as siblings. Firstly Ken ANDERSON and Jay BOWER!!! Im surprised no one has picked up this before and realized their last names are different. But that is minor compared to what happened next. Jay has informed me that Ken has no hacking abilities what so ever and has seen his brother slave over his articles. EVIDENCE STREAM ONE already proves without a doubt that Ken hacked that site and anyone who has copied homework before knows how easy it is too look like youre doing your own work. Now this may have worked for an average intelligent person but this is something that someone of my intellect knows how to see. After reading Anthony Robbins book Unlimited Power I am an expert at reading peoples hidden messages. At first I thought maybe Jay was perhaps trapped in his brothers mind games. The way he said doesn't hack and his brother slave lead me to think this. Then I aligned the evidence I had gathered on my wall and it all fell into place. Jay was actually working together with Ken. For the next hour or so I was stunned at the size of this deceit. I thought of all the kids who follow wrestling, the lies they have been fed and the size of their loyalty. This was far past being personal now, far past just one article. I was beginning to find out the truth. EVIDENCE STREAM CLOSED.
EVIDENCE STREAM THREE:
Proof: After informing Jay of his crimes I was then the victim of a smear campaign on his articles. Firstly let me point out a trap I layed for Jay and it worked perfectly. Firstly I casually remarked in an email that I had people contact me and that most of them were in support, the truth of the matter was no one had contacted me at all. The trap was indeed set and he took it hook line and sinker. On his article 06.01.03 Jay remarked that several people had been in contact with me.
Evidence Quote:
Well, an absolute ton of you sent me email saying that you emailed Peter and he was every bit as strange as I reported. I appreciate your interaction as I could only imagine the kind of shame it would bring on my family if word got out that Ken had been copying 20,000 word wrestling columns from German websites without giving proper credit.
Shame indeed.
The truth of the matter is NO ONE emailed me and this proves that the lies are coming thick and fast at Jays articles.
Also the first time Jay tried to smear me he said he had blocked my email address, how exactly could he have received my emails if he had block my address?? His subconscious cry to be caught was being well heard.
Then I was assumed to be Peter Longe. I dont know anybody by that name and the smear campaign was only beginning. Using words such as strange and unusual side this reminded me of a lot of political smear campaigns. Get hot on the trail and they try to make a fool of you. Note that EVIDENCE STREAM TWO clearly show both brothers are in on the scam. For a while I felt like suing, this was a disgrace. I felt violated but I put my issues aside for the greater good of wrestling and pushed on against the tide, the smear campaign has failed, the world knows my name is PETER DEETER, not peter longe! I dont think its a name people will soon forget and I have a feeling that people will be saying my name for a while to come. But isnt that like others? I am obviously destined for this is the case that will show that. I am about to begin a book about this ordeal which to me has been quite harrowing. And those jealous people with obviously less talent are trying to hold me back. Its happened before but now as I uncover the truth it has become red hot. I was about to uncover the most damning evidence of all. EVIDENCE STREAM CLOSED.
EVIDENCE STREAM FOUR:
Proof: This came to me as I was reading the article Jay last wrote and it rocked me to my very core. You see on the surface most criminals can appear cool calm and collected, but because of my expert knowledge after reading Anthony Robbins book Unlimited Power I have a keen eye for lying and cries for help. The sub-conscious is a deep place and after reading Anthony Robins book Unlimited Power I have become quite the observer. By this time even though they both acted calm, they were obviously in a mad panic. This is shown proof positive by the fact that it is stated that there was a late night drinking session drinking to obviously forget their problems is a common act amongst the guilty. There was also signs of Jay especially not having much to say since his last article was padded out with best of… bits and reviews. This is what happens when the noose of evidence is tightened, people panic and they dont have any sources to copy so they make some weak excuse of people coming over - note EVIDENCE STREAM THREE has proven Jay and Ken liars! Then as I sat their I realized how huge this was. By this time the evidence I had gathered was covering nearly three walls of my home and when placed in a specific order there was one sign this was pointing to, and it rocked me. I literally stumbled back as the pieces of the puzzle fit together.
Evidence quote one:
Around thirty minutes later I threw up violently...for the first time. I decided to skip my first class and laid back down, wondering how I could be throwing up from only 6 or 7 beers the night before. I heard the door open and Ken walked in whistling.
Evidence quote two:
"By the way Jay...DON'T USE THE BLENDER" he said. "It's full of Raid...those little bastards won't be mating in my blender again!".
After piecing all the pieces together it was obvious that one of two things have happened. In an absolute panic and in a drunken haze Ken has tried to off his brother in a mad scheme to point the finger of blame and guilt on Jay. Obviously what would have happened is that after Jay has not died from this bitter attack Ken has gone into the room and said quote two. Covering his tracks and laying low for the next time. Or two, in their drunken haze the night before I can only imgine what they would have been thinking about their crimes and formed a suicide pact where they would poison themselves. They must have drunk themselves to a point of forgetting and went to bed. Waking up in the morning and forgetting what they had prepared the night before. The bug story was incredibly transparent, an obvious ploy to try and throw me off the scent. These were the two options that lay infront of me. They were both conclusive and there is no doubt that one of these two events took place but its hard to say from this point which one without actually having to talk face to face with them and analyzing their facial expressions and tonality of their lies. EVIDENCE CLOSED.
CONCLUSION:
As you can obviously see from the proof I have provided is that Jay and Ken are indeed in the middle of something very deceitful and they are influencing people through their articles. See, CFGB of the old Slashwrestling who is obviously under their spell. It must be noted that many criminals have an essence that many people have said puts them under a spell. This started out as simply to inform Ken that his plagiarizing had been found out but as time went by I found myself unearthing more and more lies, deceit and here is where the line is drawn in the sand. This has taken up vast amounts of my time and I believe the effort has been worth every second. There will obviously be those who still try to topple me, to mock me. But now I will only sit back and point to the evidence listed above. It speaks for itself and I have come through it with a fine tooth-comb and it is without question water tight.
Jay and Kens removal from 411 will be effective immediately, it is my word and it will happen now. I will allow them one more article to say sorry and goodbye and to print this evidence. I am a big enough person to allow that. But after these crimes, they will never write for 411 again. My word is so.
I have survived the relentless smear campaign, the endless jokes and the fact that my name was presumed to be another when it wasnt. Child games in the eyes of masters. The evidence has now come off the walls, the case is now closed and all that is left to do is weep for the lies but feel truth for the pure sport of wrestling, truth that has been restored and honour that will be savoured for decades to come.
My name is PETER DEETER, I am the one the people know, the true wrestling fan who speaks for honour. I have told u my name and now you hear it as the all mighty, the all mighty, the all mighty.
Peter: Peter_Deeter2000@yahoo.com
After a long week, this just plain bizarre tomfoolery can really only make me shake my head in disbelief, but if Mr. Deeter has any further issue, he's going to have to take it up with a little friend of mine, and I don't think Pete will be flapping his gums so freely when The Bully and his 'poon pay him a little visit.
Well there you have it, another Sunday afternoon spent together. This is what...nine or ten Sundays in a row that we have shared. Isn't it about time that we started thinking about commitment? Are you going to be clicking on Hyatte tomorrow when I am not around to see you? On Scott Monday night behind my back? On Eric Tuesday and Grut Thursday? Are you going to be giggling at Ross Williams and sending feedback to Widro? INFIDELITY! GET OUT OF MY COLUMN.
Jay Bower || Internet Wrestling Celebrity®
TheSmarks (RIP) - 411Mania - The Oratory
