wrestling / Columns
The Pay Window 6.23.13: The Heyman Guys Collide
You guys know me, right?
I’m Craig Stevens, and this is the Pay Window, the column that looks back at the week that was in professional wrestling. Only… I do things a little bit differently. In case you missed you missed last week’s column, here’s the deal about The Pay Window: This column isn’t necessarily about the best matches and segments. Instead, I look at a backstage segment, in-ring segment, and match that are the most likely to draw money in the days and weeks to come. A lot of times there’s an overlap between the best and the money makers, but sometimes there’s a clear distinction between the two. There was a great example of that this week, actually, and I’ll talk about it more in a bit as we go to the Pay Window.
Mark Henry challenges John Cena for the WWE Championship (RAW 6.17.2013)
That’s what he do!
This was the capper to a fantastic night for Mark Henry. I don’t even think it would be hyperbole to call it a career-defining night. It’s hard for me to think of another guy who hit his peak so late into his career. And with the World Strongest Man, maybe he hasn’t even hit his absolute peak yet. He doesn’t seem to be slowing down at all; in fact, he seems to be continually getting better with age. His “retirement” was absolutely amazing, and even though I had “it’s gotta be a work” in the back of my head the whole time, I can’t say he didn’t have me wondering if it was legit at multiple points. And I think part of what made it work so well was that it came from a very real place; Mark undoubtedly has “a lot left in the tank” as he said, but I can’t help but feel he’s entering the stretch run of his career. If he’s nearing the end though, he’s certainly going out on a high note. Everything he said or did Monday night was spot-on, pitch-perfect. I doubt he actually gets to dethrone John Cena for the WWE Championship at Money in the Bank, but I bet win or lose, John Cena will be visiting the proctologist to get one of Mark Henry’s two boots surgically removed from his rear end.
Brock Lesnar hits CM Punk with the F-5 (RAW 6.17.2013)
Skip ahead to about 2:40 for Brock
This is what I was referring to earlier when I said that “best” didn’t always equate to “money”. Because as awesome as this was, it wasn’t the best in-ring segment this week. It wasn’t even the best on RAW. The Mark Henry faux retirement blew this out of the water, and ten years down the road, people will be talking about Mark Henry’s salmon blazer, not Brock Lesnar hitting CM Punk with an F-5. That being said though, CM Punk/Brock Lesnar outsells John Cena/Mark Henry by a mile, so it gets the duke here. We all knew Punk’s relationship with Paul Heyman was about to implode, and when Paul caught up with Punk just before his match with Alberto Del Rio this past Monday night, it immediately reminded me of this:
But if I said I expected Brock, especially this soon after his feud with HHH, then I’d be lying. I thought maybe they would use a feud with Punk to try and elevate Curtis Axel, or maybe use another “Paul Heyman guy” like Big Show or the returning RVD. But when Brock’s music hit, I was genuinely surprised. When I came to myself a few seconds later, I’d slid to the edge of my seat in anticipation without even realizing it. For me, CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar is one of the few legit dream matches left, and to be honest, I didn’t think WWE would be willing to go for it. Ever since Monday night, a large contingent of people on the net have been deriding the match-up, saying it would be too unbelievable. They’ve said Punk is too small, and it won’t look convincing to have Brock sell for him. I don’t really agree with that assessment, and I’d point to Brock’s feud with Eddie Guerrero as a prime example of him working credibly with a much smaller guy. But in the back of my mind, I felt like some of the powers that be in the WWE might agree with that train of thought, and shy away from the match. I think sometimes I give too much credit to IWC pundits though, because I doubt the average WWE fan gives a crap about that. Over the past year or so, Punk and Lesnar have both been presented as top-5 guys at worst, so no one’s really going to blink an eye when they treat them as relative equals. This one seems to be penciled in for Summerslam, and I think it’d be capable of easily selling the show all by itself. To say I’m incredibly excited for this one would be an understatement. And can you imagine the promos between Punk and Heyman leading up to it? If the way Paul verbally eviscerated Renee Young on Smackdown was any indication, well…
Bascially, this is me in regards to this match:
BUY IT?! I’VE ALREADY BOUGHT IT! BUY IT?! I’VE ALREADY BOUGHT IT!
Daniel Bryan vs. Randy Orton (Smackdown 6.21.2013)
After their match on RAW Monday night, the only place I expected to have Daniel Bryan in this column was in the Stock Watch section, on the downward trend. The match itself Monday was perfectly fine. But the ending kinda fell flat. Whether it was a work from the beginning, or Bryan suffered a legit stinger and they turned it into a work after the fact, I’m not sure (I lean towards the latter). But either way, the finish was disjointed, and strange, and it left me feeling kinda deflated in regards to my boy D-Bryan. But to the credit of all involved, they rectified things in a hurry on Smackdown. The promo to open the show was effective in not only setting up the match for later, but also for putting over Bryan’s toughness, as well as the great deal of respect Orton has for him. Then the match itself was outstanding. It started off fast and never really slowed down, and Bryan got to hang with Orton the whole time, absorbing huge shots like the hanging DDT and the superplex and coming back for more. The back suplex onto the barrier spot was a good callback to Monday night, and it helped prove DB’s point that he was tough enough to take punishment like that and continue on. It was good enough that I found myself hoping that they keep this rivalry going a bit longer. I kinda see them both being involved in the Money in the Bank ladder match, and even though they’ll probably go their separate ways after that match for a while, I wouldn’t mind seeing this revisited with a feud over the WWE Title down the line. It’s easily the most interested I’ve been about anything involving Randy Orton in quite some time, and the first time I’d consider shelling out my hard-earned cash to watch one of his matches in even longer.
Stock Watch for the Week of June 17th-23rd, 2013
The Wyatt Family: The Family kept their momentum going this week with another spectacularly creepy promo on RAW, and a win in six-man tag action on NXT. At this point the anticipation is just about to kill me, but rumor has it they may finally debut as soon as this coming Monday night!
Kaitlyn: I know, it’s not like the divas are ever really put into a position to draw money in the first place, BUT… still, losing the Diva’s Championship at Payback, then getting made to look like an absolute chump by Stephanie McMahon on RAW certainly won’t help matters any.
Magnus: He took the early lead in the BFG series with the only submission win on Impact Wrestling this past Thursday. Magnus is a total package, he has a good look and can go, but it seems like TNA is very wishy-washy with him. They’ll push him for a month or two, then it’s like he falls off the face of the Earth for three or four. A strong run in the series would do everyone involved a lot of good, but TNA has no benefit of the doubt with me these days. I do honestly like TNA though, so I’d be the first one to hope they prove me wrong this time.
Michael Cole: You may be thinking to yourself, “why is he wasting column space on Michael Cole?”, but stick with me for a second. I liken a good play-by-play man to an offensive linemen in football. When they’re doing their job properly, you hardly ever hear about them; but when they give up a sack, they get crucified for it in the media. I’m not going to be quite that harsh, but something did happen on Smackdown that bugged me. During the Christian/Drew McIntyre match, Cole made the statement, “Christian has been dominated by McIntyre”. The only problem with that is, it’d only been like 90 seconds into the match, so he hadn’t really had time to be “dominating”. Not to mention the fact that Christian had controlled the ENTIRE (albeit really short) match up until that point, and that was literally the first (and only, I’m pretty sure) offensive move Drew hit during the match. It might seem like a simple slip up, and not a big deal, but it completely took me out of this match. I spent the rest of the match wondering if Cole was even paying attention to what was going on, and asking myself if the lead announcer isn’t paying attention, then why should I? And that isn’t how anybody’s gonna make any money.
Christian: Speaking of Captain Charisma, though, he was (finally) back this week, as apparently creative (finally) figured out something to do. His two matches were nothing mind-blowing, but he did get some fairly significant pops, and that tells me there might still be a few dollars to be made off the old vet.
Wade Barrett: Not so much for opponent from RAW, though. Ah, how the mighty have fallen. What happened to the guy who led Nexus? What happened to the guy who main-evented PPV’s against John Cena and Randy Orton, and has only gotten better since then? He never really got traction again after the broken arm, did he? Hopefully he gets another shot to be a player eventually, and doesn’t stay stuck down in Kofi/Miz Hell.
Rob Van Dam: If you’d have asked me a week ago if I thought a 42-year old RVD could still be a draw in 2013 WWE, especially after the tail end of his last TNA run, I’d have said, “NO!” But anybody who watched Payback and heard the RVD chants last for a solid three or four matches after his return promo aired knows that I’d have been DEAD wrong. Especially in Philly. Here’s hoping being back on the WWE stage gets him motivated and he can live up to the hype.
Dolph Ziggler: I hate putting the Show Off here two weeks running. I think the face run is going to be great, and he’s going to sell CRAZY amounts of merchandise. When he flew off the stage at Alberto Del Rio on RAW Monday, it reminded me of when Owen Hart jumped HBK shortly after the screw-job in Montreal. But when Chris Jericho dropped him with a codebreaker, and ADR kicked his head in again on Smackdown, it reminded me of when HBK referred to Owen Hart as a “nugget”. So, yeah. Long term… good. Short term? Not so much.
Paul Heyman: Did I mention the face-melter Paul E. cut on Renee Young on Smackdown? I did? Well, it bears repeating, because that thing was HOT. If Paul brings game like that every week, it’s only going to elevate Punk/Lesnar to an even higher level.
Bo Dallas: Big E had it right a few weeks ago when he called Bo a geek. And to his credit, he plays the disingenuous little prick to perfection. Maybe he does it too well, because right now it’s getting to “X-Pac heat” levels of “just go away” for me every time he’s on my screen. I mean, I’ve got nothing personal against the dude. It’s just… ugh. Just thinking about him annoys me. I’m cringing sitting here typing this. I’m gonna stop now.
No… you know what? Just to get that bad taste out of my mouth…
You didn’t really think I could go without posting this, did you? YOU THINK IT’S THAT EASY?!
Ah. That’s better. AND NOW-
Evolution Schematic: Kane 2.0 (Part 1)
That does it for me this week. Follow me on Twitter for semi-regular, semi-live tweeting for RAW, Smackdown, and Impact Wrestling… and until we meet again-
