The Wrestling 5 & 1 12.21.13 Layla El vs. Kelly Kelly

CRIMBUS IS COMING!!! Hey y’all, hope everyone is getting ready for the festivities! If you don’t celebrate, then I hope you have the best LAST Thursday of the year! I’d thank y’all, but I did that about three weeks ago, and the response was a bunch of negative Nellies gettin all cray cray. Did you guys see that match on RAW?! Ooo-weeee! Be sure to check out the last Point (ONE) for comment responses and fun! Anyways, I got a column to write, so leggo!

Randy Orton Low Blows the Fans?

Yeah, we’re a hurtin if this is the top news story of the week. Actually, it probably shouldn’t be the top story, but it’s nearing Christmas, and I don’t find Hulk Hogan’s sex tape the least bit interesting. Like seriously, that’s not even car-crash type interesting. Anyway, my job as the RAW Recapper is to type out the action as it happens. More often than not, I throw a thought and a rating below, but it’s hardly ever concrete and just an immediate response to what I saw. I tell ya this, guys, try and type out just three matches of RAW while watching, and notice how differently you watch the match: how many spots are repeated, how frequently we start with a lockup vs a go-behind, how your thoughts and ratings change; it’s a definite different change of pace and viewing. Now then, what I was saying is this past Monday, I was typin away during the main event, and in a rare occurrence, my excitement was all over the place. I was going Slimmer on that main event. CAPS LOCK galore, and oh whole lot of “holy shits.” I could feel the intensity through the typing and the match, and it was like I was a reporter, front row, with a pen in my Fedora, and grit in my heart.

Then the low blow happened…

And oh what a low blow it was. Immediately, the comment section went a bit overboard with anger and vitriol. How could they have such a great match with such a crappy ending? How could they possibly expect us to be ok with such a shit ending? How could a possible match of the year end with such a crappy, no good, son of a Shockmaster ending?!? Well, I’m sure I’m not alone when I say that…it was a PERFECT ending. Ok, ok, maybe not “perfect,” but it certainly wasn’t as bad as some think. If we get down to the nitty gritty, Orton’s mindset was supposed to be “I have to prove myself,” but that could only go so far for a heel, and he resorted to heel tactics. Ric Flair didn’t become the dirtiest player in the game without cheating, and yet he’s heralded as a bad ass in the squared circle. I’m not saying Orton is even in his field – but we must remember that he is a heel, and heels do bad things. I truly don’t think the ending hurt the match in the least, and only added to the fact that Bryan may very well have made his return to the main event. I won’t hold my breath – I’m pretty skeptic, still – but there’s hope, people! There’s hope!

Of course, one must question why the hell this is our top point, and why you’re reading something that you may have already assessed and pontificated to be true. I think the reason this means a lot to me is that for a few months now, I’ve been harping…really harping about the misuse of Bryan and how he could very well be a top champion. I never wanted Bryan to be the “face” of the WWE, simply to get a legit reign. Whether it’s the fanboy in me, or I try to justify it with merchandise sales and fan adulation, there has been some odd need for me to see this guy succeed at the top and be something. For months, we’ve been teased, poked, prodded, ridiculed, and laughed at by Triple H. I seriously feel that the last few months weren’t written for the mass of fans, but for us peasants who only complain. But as we get closer and closer to Mania, I have an unsettling in my gut that maybe – just maybe – Triple H is done messin around, and will pull the trigger on a Bryan reign. Is it dumb to think this way? Maybe, but I’m liking the possibility of a Rumble winner named Bryan going for the big one.

Your Turn: Is Bryan gearing up for another big time push?

Yes! Yes! Yes! Facebook page, I posted this pic for all to comment on…

And the commenter with the most “likes”???

Dave TheWave Marklinger: “Hey Steph, you gotta try this–it’s like kissing a peanut!”

Think you have what it takes to win the Caption Contest? Head on over to the Yes! Yes! Yes! Facebook group and join today to see what Tony, myself and the gang post next!

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Paige absolutely SLAUGHTERED Emma! Ouch! What this does is put Paige back in the running, but considering we had her earlier this year, I thought we’d start fresh and put together a former HOB member and a former WWE Diva….

And now…..

Voting ends Wednesday night and you can vote once every hour!

Who Will Win the Rumble?

With the TLC PPV in the bag, the Royal Rumble comes upon us like clouds in the wind. Speed-dating commercials, and speculations are abound as we gear up for one of the big four, and many peoples’ favorite PPV. With that being said, there are already guesses as to who will take the title of the Rumble Winner home, and considering this springboards them directly towards the main event of Wrestlemania, does that make the winner that more prestigious? Does it mean a dark horse like Roman Reigns is out of the question? Let me know!

Merry Christmas!!!
Let’s start at the top, with Adam who claimed this is the only column he still reads. Thank you kindly, sir, but be sure to check out the other guys. They put a lot of work into their stuff, and that one-two punch of Pilkington-Atkinson really tickles my funny bone. Hitman2013 and I were both wrong thinking Cena was going to walk out as Champion, but I’m likin his list of top contenders – especially considering our midcard top title (the WHC) is no longer in existence. Patrick lets us know he knows real names. Ice Dagger pulls out the ice dagger on Pound Town and tells him to calm his tits. manface doesn’t want to see Cena on top for the next 15 years, whether it be Nikki or the WWE. Matt clicked, didn’t read, voted on the poll, and wanted me to have a nice day! What a sweetheart. CMWolf wants a name change. I wish I could come up with something more original…maybe CM5&1?

What a cute lil elf!

Tony Acero is currently a student at Cal State University of Long Beach. He is double-majoring as a Creative Writing and Literature major. His first book, Through The Looking Glass, was published in April, 2012. School’s Out is a short story that found the author arrested due to the severity of its content. Both can be found on amazon.com.

Tony joined 411Mania in April 2010, and currently contributes in both music and wrestling. Tony is an avid drinker of Mountain Dew and Jack Daniels. He is a writer who hardly takes himself seriously, yet has an innate ability to create moments that are both human yet fearful in his writings.

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HALL OF FAME
Greg DeMarco is a graduate of Virginia Tech (Bachelor’s in Business Management) and Arizona State (Master’s in Higher & Post-Secondary Education). He works in online higher education. Greg started in improv comedy in 2001, making his stand-up debut in 2004.

Greg first appeared as a ring announcer for Rising Phoenix Wrestling in Phoenix Arizona in 2006 and served many promotions in both on-stage and back-stage roles for over six years, most notably Ring of Honor in 2010. He began writing for 411Mania in October 2010, founded The Greg DeMarco Show in May 2011 and opened WrestlingSmash.com (and Wrestling Smash Radio) in January 2013.

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Until next week…