Cheap Wrestling for Cheap People 04.13.06: Chikara Tag World Grand Prix (Part 2)
Posted by Ryan Byers on 04.13.2006
It's night two of the biggest little tag team tournament in the United States, featuring wrestlers from Japan, Montreal, Mexico, and Medieval Europe!
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to Cheap Wrestling for Cheap People. We're in week two of my three week review of Chikara pro wrestling's 2006 Tag World Grand Prix, a massive tag team tournament featuring wrestlers from all over the planet. If you're curious about the tournament's background, why I consider it cheap wrestling, or what happened on the first night of competition, click here for last week's review. This week I'll take on the second night of the tournament, but first I wanted to share an e-mail from 411's own Violent Panda, Peter Kent. He was at the Tag World Grand Prix live and had some comments on my comments on the show:
Mickie is one of my favorite wrestlers, period. She's up for anything and can take a beating.
As for Sweeney, that match was just not good. When you see Night 3, you'll get a better look at what he can do. He's a guy whose wrestling style is very dull, but his mic work and gimmick are exceptional. Once you see his new strut.. it's over.
I don't know how it came off on tape, but live, Ranmaru's kicks just clearly did not connect. She had this awesome, lightning quick delivery but the for whatever reason she did not err on the side of stiffness. I mean.. It's Claudio. You're 100 pounds. Kick him, he can take it.
Yago and KUDO's exchange was awesome to behold. Kudo, despite having a "legit fighter" gimmick, pretty much got owned by Yago. I think Yago actually competes as a kickboxer or something.
The main event had an impossible act to follow. From what I could tell, they decided to just take lots of scary stiff bumps. Kingston looked legit fucked up after it was over, cutting a promo that didn't make a lot of sense. I don't know if that made the DVD or not.
On the one hand, I feel that your match ratings are low, especially in the case of DDT vs. K DOJO. But on the other, I know that seeing a match live is entirely different than on tape. BLK OUT vs. Necro & Joker, to me, would rate higher than, say, Kane & Big Show vs. Carltio and Masters from Wrestlemania.
But I hate it when people throw around **** match ratings with impunity, so I'll take it.
And that's that for the live perspective on night one. Now it's time to move in to the taped perspective on night two, but first here's a little bit of background on the teams that we'll be seeing on this side of the bracket.
The Colony (Fire Ant & Solider Ant) – I believe the Colony was making its Chikara debut in this tournament, though they have stuck around and worked on the company's subsequent shows. Because they're relatively new, not much is known about them. However, the gimmick should be pretty clear from their names. They're ants. What more do you need?
Lancelot (Lance Steele & Lance Steele) – This, ladies and gentlemen, is one of my favorite gimmicks in professional wrestling today. For quite some time, Chikara played home to Lance Steele, a medieval knight who fell through a time warp and landed in modern day Pennsylvania. He trained to be a pro wrestler. Then, many months later, a second knight fell through a time warp and landed in modern day Pennsylvania. This knight was ALSO Lance Steele but from about a week earlier in the time stream. It's funny enough on its own, but it gets even funnier when you're reading Dave Meltzer's attempt at explaining the gimmick on WrestlingObserver.com. Anyway, both Lances are Chikara regulars.
Northstar Express (Darin Corbin & Ryan Cruz) – To be honest, I'm not sure what wrestling promotion the Express comes out of, though I do know that the two young men hail from Minnesota. They're a pretty generic little spot monkey tag team, but one thing made them stand out in this tournament – James J. Dillon. Yes, in the weeks leading up to the tournament, Chikara hyped up a "legendary manager" as appearing on the show, and it was said that various teams were in a bidding war for his services. It turned out to be JJ, the brains behind the original incarnations of the Four Horsemen. Think it's odd to see a guy like Dillon on a show like this? Well, he did have a book to promote . . .
Notorious, Inc. (Drew Blood & Devon Moore) – Blood and Moore are graduates of Afa the Wild Samoan's training camp and compete regularly for his WXW indy promotion in the Pennsylvania area.
Team SHIMMER (Daizee Haze & Rain) – SHIMMER is a relatively new all-women's promotion based out of Berwyn, Illinois that has a working agreement with Ring of Honor. Their first DVD has been getting rave reviews, though I have yet to pick up a copy of it myself. They've sent Daizee Haze and Rain to compete in the Tag World. Haze got her start in the Missouri area and has since appeared repeatedly for IWA Mid-South and Ring of Honor. Rain kicked her career off on the east coast because she was dating an indy wrestler but has since stepped out on her own and gained a pretty decent reputation.
FIST (Icarus & Gran Akuma) – FIST is comprised of Chikara regulars Icarus and Gran Akuma. They're pretty big heels in the company and are aligned with the Kings of Wrestling, who we saw compete on night one. I'm still scratching my head trying to figure out what FIST might stand for.
Men@Work (Mr. Zero & Shane Storm) – M@W are also Chikara regulars. Zero has the gimmick of a middle aged office worker, while Storm is a "unionized traffic regulator." They're probably the biggest guys on the Chikara roster, though a.) that isn't saying much and b.) they can still move around the ring pretty well.
2.0 (Shane Matthews & Jagged) – Jagged and Matthews were flown in from Montreal's IWS promotion to work the tournament. I can't say that I've seen much out of them before, so I'll just have to sit back and learn.
Team Toryumon (Amigo Suzuki & Shinjitsu Nohashi) – Both of these men were competitors in Toryumon Japan when that company still existed. As such, they are trainees of the Ultimo Dragon Gym and are well schooled in the lucharesu style. Amigo plays the role of a Japanese man obsessed with Mexican culture, while Nohashi is a disciple of Jinsei Shinzaki, who was better known in the states as Hakushi.
Triple Dragon (Dragon Dragon & Retail Dragon) – This is Chikara's big joke about how there are far too many indy wrestlers who use the word "dragon" in their names. Dragon Dragon is a guy who wrestles while wearing a dragon costume . . . the sort that you'd expect to see on a Disney World character. Retail Dragon, meanwhile, dresses like any indy guy who idolizes Jushin Lyger. The idea is apparently that his father was a Dragon and his mother was a Wal-Mart employee. At least that's what Larry Sweeney says.
The Prescription Thugs (Dr. Cheung & Darkness Crabtree) – Darkness Crabtree is Chikara's resident old codger. We're not sure how old, but I guess he would have to be pushing seventy-five. Obviously with an old, worn down body like that, he needs a good deal of medicine to stay active in the ring. Cue Dr. Cheung, who gives Darkness the pills that he needs to keep his body feeling good. God, I can't believe a wrestling company is actually doing a gimmick like this.
Milano Collection AT & Skayde – Skayde is a luchadore who was the head trainer at Ultimo Dragon's Gym in Mexico. He's since become more active in the United States, making many an appearance in Chikara rings. Milano is one of Skayde's former students, the "ace" of the Torymon 2000 Project, which was the second class of graduates from the Dragon Gym. He's relocated to American for an indefinite period of time after a falling out with his Japanese compatriots.
Team IWS (Kevin Steen & Sexxxy Eddy) – Yes, 2.0 was also from IWS, so this is actually our second team for that company. Eddy is a seven year veteran who was just discovered by the United States about a year and a half ago thanks to some sick, sick bumps that he took in CZW rings. Steen's American career started gaining momentum at the same time in the same company, and now he regularly appears for both CZW and PWG.
Arik Cannon & ???? – Those of you who read my review of night one know the deal with Cannon. He's a former heel who's looking to change his old ways and looking for a partner to enter the tournament with. I suppose this drama will continue to develop as the night goes on.
The Heartbreak Express (Superstar Sean & Fabulous Phil) – Sean and Phil are a Florida team with a comedy gimmick plucked right out of the 1970's. They do the whole "ambiguously gay guys who think they're a hit with the ladies" schtick, and Sean does it while weighing in excess of three hundred pounds. Fans either seem to love their act or loathe it.
Team Muga (Osamu Nishimura & Katsushi Takemura) – Though Chikara brought in a lot of Japanese talent for this tournament, these two were the really big coup. They're both longtime veterans of the puroresu world and were a regular part of the New Japan Pro Wrestling roster until a few months before the tournament. For whatever reason they decided that they did not want to work for that company any longer and became freelancers . . . which landed them here of all places.
So those are the sixteen teams competing on night two. Let's get to the action.
Title: Chikara Tag World Grand Prix Released By: Smart Mark Video Release Year: 2006 Run Time: Fucking long. Found At: SmartMarkVideo.com Price: $60
We get another opening ceremony up top, as well as another Arik Cannon promo. Some other guy that I've never heard of turns him down, making this four total rejections for Cannon.
Match Numero Uno: The Colony vs. Lancelot
Lancelot teases dissension in their pre-match promo, as one of the Lances has apparently decided to adopt modern clothing and technology . . . but, worst of all, he's befriended Dragon Dragon who is – gasp – A DRAGON! It's like an updated version of Guess Who's Coming to Dinner. The Colony doesn't cut a promo, but they have a great entrance, in which they climb up and down the turnbuckles not unlike a pair of ants climbing up your wall.
Solider Ant kicks it off with, um, Lance Steele, and they do some standing switches in to an armbar sequence. Lance gets a single leg and looks for a Boston crab, but Ant reverses by climbing up his body and falling over in to a victory roll for two. Fire Ant and the other Lance make it in after that, and they also do the armbar bit. Fire eventually turns his in to an Octopus, from which he floats over in to a rana. He gets in an armdrag as well, but it's no sold because of the "steel armor" that the Lances wear. (In reality, it's just a colorful vest.) Everybody hits the ring after that, and Lancelot goes for "the joust," in which one man rides on the other's back and punches an opponent on the face. They hit it on Solider and try for it on Fire, but he leaps off of the second rope and pulls a Lance down in to the Buff Blockbuster. Fire stays in there with a Lance and puts him in a chinlock, after which he trades off to Solider Ant. Solider lands a vertical suplex and applies the key lock. Lance tries to elbow out but can't make the tag. The Ants do a bit of double teaming, running in circles around the prone Steele and dropping a series of snap elbows. A frog splash from Solider follows up, and then both Ants head up to the second rope. Steele cuts them off and manages to get BOTH men in to a fireman's carry . . . and he hits the Fit Finaly forward roll with two men on his back! That was impressive.
It also gets the hot tag as Lance #2 takes everybody out and applies a nice Boston crab to Solider. Fire ends it with a bulldog and gets a fireant's carry takedown, which is followed up with a diving headbutt from Solider. The knights are then picked up by the ants, and an airplane spin and a giant swing are simultaneously executed. Everybody winds up dizzy for a little bit, after which the Colony looks for stereo piledrivers. Those get reversed, and Lancelot gets in stereo Boston crabs. The ants tap to the crabs at the 10:13 mark.
Match Thoughts: This was a pretty solid wrestling match, particularly if the Colony actually were two new wrestlers and not just a couple of more experienced guys doing a new gimmick. The whole match was pretty faced paced without getting too spotty, and they did a good ratio of comedy spots to actual wrestling holds. On top of that, a lot of the moves that they were trying wound up being pretty innovative, and nobody screwed anything up too badly despite that fact. However, the most impressive part seemed to be the ring presence of the Lance Steeles. Even with the quick pace, the unique moves, and the identical costumes, I was always aware of which one was which and who was legal. It seemed like they were working really hard to be in the right place at the right time so that there would not be any confusion in that regard. **1/4
Match Numero Dos: The Northstar Express w/ James J. Dillon vs. Notorious, Inc.
Notorious, Inc. ambushes their opponents before the opening bell, but the Express comes back with a double Japanese armdrag and a double gutbuster. Things clam down with Moore and Cruz in the ring, with the armbar getting plenty of exposure. There's a rope running sequence as well, with Cruz coming out on the winning end thanks to a rana and an armdrag. Corbin tags in at this point, and he also decide to work the arm. Blood gets in a cheap shot from the apron, though, which sets up a big kick from Moore and then tag. Drew hits the high knee and a vertical suplex/kneedrop one-two. Notorious, Inc. starts double teaming now, catapulting Corbin in to the corner and then hitting a double dropkick as Corb is pressed against the turnbuckle. When Corbin attempts a comeback, Blood goes to the eyes and tags in Moore, resulting in some HARD corner strikes from the Notorious boys. Moore follows that with a slingshot splash, though his top rope elbowdrop misses. That almost sets up the hot tag, but Drew Blood is in to prevent it. Corbin does eventually somersault under a clothesline, though, and that puts Cruz in to the ring. He BLASTS Moore with a spinning kick and tosses Blood from the ring, leading in to a lungblower and a spot in which Cruz monkey flips Corbin in to their opponent. Of course, that takes Corbin out of the ring, and Cruz is about ready to get double teamed. Blood pulls out the brass knux , but JJ Dillon pops up on to the apron and intercepts them. That allows the Express to hit a fun finishing move in which one of them gives the other an Inverted Alabama Slam down on to Moore. It ends the match in 8:00 even.
Match Thoughts: The Northstar Express was a very odd team to watch, as they're a couple of guys who execute wrestling moves very well and seem to have a good idea of how to play to the crowd . . . but they look NOTHING like what you would expect a couple of professional wrestlers to look like. There's no muscle mass, no tan, no height, nothing. Like I said earlier, though, they can wrestle, and it was on display here. The match wasn't phenomenal but was inoffensive. Ultimately I think it needed another two minutes or so for me to really gauge the level of the men involved, and hopefully the Express will get that in later rounds. Oh yeah, and the bit with JJ at the end was cute. *1/2
Guess whos's back . . . back again. Arik's back . . . back again. Indy worker Niles Young shoots him down, just like everybody else has done so far. Whether the point of these is to get Cannon over as a face or a heel, they're having the effect of getting him over as a pathetic, whiny loser.
Match Numero Tres: Team SHIMMER vs. Team FIST
Haze and Akuma get this party started, and they do a pretty straight armbar/headlock reversal bit, with Akuma taking Daizee's moves seriously. The same does not hold true when she tries for an armdrag, as Akuma just picks her up and holds her. Haze responds with HUGE rana and a facebuster, which takes Akuma out of the ring. That brings in Icarus and Rain, with Icarus offering a free shot. Rain takes it and then hits a second rope cross body and a lungblower. God, that move USED to be fun, but everybody in this tournament seems intent on killing it. Akuma comes in as a result of Icarus hitting the floor, and he hits a jawbreaker and a roundhouse kick to Rain's head. He ties her in the ropes for more hard kicks, and a tag to Icarus sees the winged warrior drop an elbow from the second rope. A fisherman suplex is next, but it can only get two. Icarus looks for something in the corner, but he runs in to many elbows and boots from the lady. He does rally with a dropkick and brings Akuma back in to things. He slaps on a chinlock, which is elbowed out of. Rain tries to follow up with a rana, but Akuma blocks the move and turns it in to a weird yet nasty looking submission. He drops her out of it and in to a side slam, and here comes Icarus. He lets Rain get too close to her corner, though, and Haze is in. She gets Icarus out of the ring and Thesz presses Akuma to set up a top rope rana. Akuma turns that in to a powerbomb, but Rain saves at the two count and lands a tornado DDT on Icarus for two. An odd lucha submission is next from the SHIMMER representative, but Icarus pulls her off and hits a backbreaker. He sets Rain up for something or other, as Haze tries to save with a missile dropkick. She misses her mark and hits Rain, as if the winner of the match wasn't already clear. Icarus tries to toss Daizee from the ring, but it gets a bit screwed up, with the young lady smacking her face on the top rope. She does eventually get out of there, and Icarus hits a Pedigree on Rain. He slaps on a choke, and that ends things at 9:43.
Match Thoughts: This had the potential to be a carbon copy of the intergender match from night one, but fortunately it was not. I don't know if there was an active decision made by the wrestlers to differentiate from the previous evening's bout, but they did a good job of it regardless. Instead of being the arrogant prick heels that the Kings of Wrestling played, Icarus and Akuma decided that they were going to be complete and utter sadists. They weren't just beating up weaker people because it was their job . . . they were gaining a sick pleasure out of it, and this clearly showed in all of their moves and facial expressions. Team SHIMMER did a decent job as well, knowing when to time their comebacks and how to make them look effective. However, what made night one's bout better was the selling of Sumie Sakai during the heat sequence, as Rain was still serviceable in that role but wasn't quite as sympathetic as Sumie. Perhaps with a few more years' experience she'll get there. **
And it's Arik. I should point out that he's rather portly and wearing a Kool-Aid shirt this evening, causing the crowd to yell "OH YEAH!" at him repeatedly. He calls out Jervis Cottonbelly, wacky masked resident of Chikara who comes complete with a cotton covered belly. He looks so ridiculous that Cannon doesn't even bother asking him to team up. Well, at least that was different.
Match Numero Cuatro: 2.0 vs. Men@Work
SHANE MATTHEWS! SHANE STORM! IN THE RING! Woo. Matthews is a very loud man, which he displays after getting knocked down by a shoulderblock. An armdrag and a back elbow also connect from the traffic regulator, and Jagged replaces his partner, only to be caught in a double drop toe hold by the Men@Work. Zero applies the camel clutch after that, and he starts reading the newspaper while still applying the hold. That is comedy. It gets even better, as Shane Matthews gets pissed off and elbowdrops the paper. Meanwhile, Jagged gets Zero in a fireman's carry, and Matthews comes off of the top rope with a Buff Blockbuster on the middle aged office worker. Matthews tags in at this point, hitting a nice back elbow and dropping some elbows on the leg before slapping on a toe hold. He trades off to Jagged after that, and it's a backbreaker/kneelift combo from 2.0. Jagged stays on his man with a side Russian leg sweep, though it can only get two. Matthews tags back in and lands the snap suplex and a subsequent kneedrop. A swinging neckbreaker connects as well, and it sets up yet another tag, which sets up a two man STO by the IWS representatives. Zero starts to fire back with some punches after his opponents spend too long playing to the crowd, and he JUMPS OUT OF THE RING, resulting in the lucha tag. Genius. Shane Storm runs in and bodyslams everybody, but he winds up leaving rather quickly. Things come down to Jagged and Zero, with Zero hitting a weird looking facebuster to get the pin at 7:44. That came out of nowhere.
Match Thoughts: 2.0 did a fantastic job of playing to the crowd here, as they were literally yelling something out to the audience for about fifty percent of the match. Some folks may have found it a little distracting, but it actually got the audience to react to a relatively unknown team, so I'm not going to fault them for it. Meanwhile, Storm and Zero were pretty good comedic wrestlers, working in their funny spots nicely but not going so over the top that you couldn't take them seriously as wrestlers if the situation called for it. As for the work here, everything was faced paced and executed well, though it wasn't too spectacular after having watched so many other matches that followed the same basic pattern. *3/4
Match Numero Cinco: Triple Dragon vs. Team Toryumon
It's Retail Dragon and Suzuki up front, and they trade variations on the armdrag, with Retail getting the better of it. Amigo offers his hand in friendship, but he winds up kicking Dragon in the stomach and then later in the back. Nohashi's in now, and he directs some palm thrusts in to his opponent's face. They're loud, too. Suzuki's in rather quickly, and he uses an STO to set up a keylock on the mat. There's the exchange to Nohashi, and the the Japanese natives take turns avalanching Retail in the corner. Then they hit Andy Douglas and Chase Stevens' Natural Disaster, and Suzuki stays in the ring. There's a really odd move after that, and I don't know if somebody screwed up or if it was just one of those overly complex indy spots where you can't tell who is supposed to be in pain after it's executed. Whatever it was, it sets up the hot tag to Dragon Dragon. He trips up Suzuki with his tail and hits a Dragon Screw leg whip on Nohashi. The dragon sleeper is then applied to Amigo, and Dragon teases a dragon suplex afterwards. Nohashi saves, though, and he gets a ropewalk chop on Dargon Dragon, which he follows up with a great tope suicida on Retail Dragon. Meanwhile Suzuki headbutts Dragon Dragon like mad before tying him up in the ropes. With Dragon Dragon immobilized, Team Toryumon hit stereo swandive headbutts on Retail. Nohashi follows that up with a crucifix bomb, and we have our winners at 7:46. All I have to say is thank god they didn't fly in these two guys to job to a guy who dresses like a minor league baseball mascot.
Match Thoughts: It was a comedy match featuring a man in an eight foot tall dragon costume. Fun, but that sort of thing will never be a MOTYC or anything. * I do give the man in the Dragon Dragon costume all the credit in the world for his ability to move so well in the damn thing, though.
Match Numero Seis: Milano Collection AT & Skayde vs. The Prescription Thugs
Here's Crabtree, and here's Milano, so let's get started. AT works the arm to start, but Crabtree makes the ropes. He gets a single leg after that but is too slow to follow up on it, resulting in his legs getting kicked out from under him. Cheung and Skayde are now in, with the Mexican getting an armdrag that sends the good doctor out of the ring. Darkness replaces him, but he has to pause to take his medication. Skayde tries some as well before downing the whole bottle. He sells some side effects but winds up suckering Crabtree in to a single leg. Darkness comes back with an armdrag, though, and he gets a high elevation dropkick to send Skayde out of the ring. Milano comes in with an enzuguri that dispatches Crabtree, and Cheung runs in to take on the faux Italian. He hits something akin to Cradle Shock and then slows down the pace, choking away for a while. All four men enter the ring after this, resulting in the Thugs getting chopped and whipped in to each other. Stereo submissions follow from Milano and Skayde, and the bad guys tap in a surprisingly quick 5:30.
Match Thoughts: Given the awesomeness that is Milano, the experience of Skayde, and the nice spots the Thugs were pulling off, it looked like this match was going to have a world of potential. Then it just sort of . . . ended. This was good for five and a half minutes but probably would have been better if it was given more time. * However, this will all be worth it if it allows the evening's second round matches to go a little bit longer than they did on night one.
Match Numero Siete: Arik Cannon & ???? vs. Kevin Steen & Sexxxy Eddy
Cannon's out first, and he, at long last, reveals who is partner is. It's Jigsaw, who had already turned him down on night one. There's no real explanation given for the masked man's change of heart.
Steen and Cannon are up in the beginning, and Cannon seems to be content to run this whole "Oh Yeah!" thing in to the ground as quickly as possible while working a headlock. The two comparably sized men shoulderblock each other a lot after that, though nobody can take anybody else down. They trade punches and forearms, and Steen reverses a sunset flip in to a double stomp and then a senton. A flipping legdrop hits as well, though it can only get a two count. Eddy is in after that, and Steen slams him down on to Cannon for another nearfall. The Sex Express gets a cross body block, and his vertical suplex is impressive due to the size difference between the two men. Cannon does maage to respond with a swinging neckbreaker, and that brings Jigsaw in to the ring. He chops away and gets a high knee in the corner before landing a basement dropkick and bringing Cannon back. Arik leaps in to a back elbow, setting up a fabulous double team in whcih Cannon holds Eddy over the top rope, allowing Jgisaw to jump off of the turnbuckles with a double stomp. Cannon then yanks Eddy off the top with Rob Conway's Ego Trip. Jigsaw stays in the ring as the legal man after that and hits another knee in the corner. There's a snap suplex as well, and Cannon returns for an oddball submission hold. He uses his free hand to chop Eddy's chest while he's in the hold, but it's eventually released. Jigsaw comes back in, dropping a leg and applying a headscissors, which he eventually turns in to a cross arm breaker. The Sexxxy one makes the ropes quickly, but Jigsaw stays on him with another double stomp and a tag to Cannon, who slaps on a rather brutal looking submission that I can't describe in less than a paragraph.
Eddy slips out and hits a desperation clothesline, which almost gets the hot tag but not quite. Jigsaw comes back in at this point, but his attempt at a rana is turned in to an Ace Crusher. That gets the big tag, and here's Steen. He dishes out inverted atomic drops and lungblowers for all, followed up by a dropkick on Cannon. A big capture suplex gets two on Jigsaw, but the puzzle piece manages to respond with a jawbreaker. That sets up a backdrop suplex by Cannon, but Sexxy Eddy saves. Eddy also hits a whellbarrow suplex on Arik and heads up to the top rope, only to have Jigsaw pop up and hit him with a rana. An enzuguri connects as well, but, when he tries it on Steen, Jig is caught in an insane crossface variation. Cannon saves with a dropkick to Steen's head, but his version of the Shining Wizard can't connect. Everybody teases their finishers at this point with nothing connecting. Cannon does get the Wizard on Steen, but he rolls out of the ring to avoid being pinned. With Kevin dispatched, Arik lays in some big kicks to Eddy's head and chest, which puts him in perfect position for a Jigsaw guillotine legdrop. That one ends the match at 16:07.
Match Thoughts: This was the best Kevin Steen match that I've ever seen . . . which really isn't saying that much. Here, much like the majority of the matches on the show, the offense in was executed well and the pacing was fine. However, the whole match seemed completely backwards. Why? For the ENTIRE FREAKING TOURNAMENT THUSFAR, they've had Arik Cannon coming out and whining and moaning about how he can't find himself a tag team partner . . . about how he's alienated himself from the rest of the boys in the locker room and just wants one chance to do well in the tournament . . . about how he just needs one person to give him an opportunity. It was a total babyface routine, and then what happens when he finally gets in to the ring with his partner? They play the heel role, spending the entire match getting heat on Sexxxy Eddy and building up a hot tag to Kevin Steen. Again, if I'd gone in to this match with no context whatsoever, it would probably get a pretty decent rating, but the match was a complete reversal of what was happening in the storylines, and I can't just let that slide. **1/2
After the match, everybody engages in a dance off. Announcer Larry Sweeney's reaction of "The show's already long enough," seems appropriate. This somehow turns in to a kick line with special guest Eddie Kingston.
Match Numero Ocho: The Heartbreak Express vs. Osamu Nishimura & Katsushi Takemura
Nishimura is in with Fabulous Phil, and there's heel miscommunication in the first thirty seconds, as the Express run in to each other and then get clotheslined out of the ring by Takemura. Sean takes over on Nish after that, but he's taken back in to the corner, where Takemura tags in and stomps away. Sean goes to the eyes and brings in Phil for a double back elbow and some more generic offense. Sean is back in rather quickly for a huge splash, and both guys head to the floor. Sean hits and then chokes his man with a chair, as the referee decides to just ignore it. Takemura is posted after that, and Nishimura apparently wasn't briefed on the lucha tag rules. The crowd tries to remind him, but it's of no use. When things make it back in to the ring, Phil takes over on Takemura for some choking, which leads in to a Sean avalanche. They try it again, but Katsushi moves and lariats Phil down, leading in to our hot tag. Nishimura gives multiple European uppercuts to everything that moves and then applies the abdominal sretch to Phl. Sean saves, but Phil is quickly caught in a backslide, which ends the match at 7:03.
Match Thoughts: As the announcers mentioned at the outset, this was a bizarre pairing. Two technically proficient puroresu stars well-schooled in both strong style and European mat wrestling going against a couple of guys who are a throwback to 1970's Southern gimmick tag teams. The result wasn't too great, as the Express just wanted to stand around and do a bunch of schtick, while their opponents seemingly couldn't figure out what the hell was going on. I wouldn't mind seeing the Heartbreak Express again in an actual comedy match, but trying to put them up against a serious team just didn't work at all. 1/4*
Intermission hits, and then it's time for round two!
Match Numero Neuve: Northstar Express w/ James. J. Dillon vs. Lancelot
Armbars are traded between Cruz and a Lance Steel in the early going, and Lance opens up the offense with a dropkick and a slingshot clothesline down to the floor. Lance #2 and Corbin come in, with Darin missing a neck snap but rebounding quickly with a headscissor. Steele catches him in a full nelson, but Cruz gets a blind tag when we run the ropes. Things get odd at this point, with the Northstars and Lance doing an odd series of drop downs over one another, culminating in a somersault and a "Huzzah!" from the other Lance. When things get back to normal, Cruz misses a cross body on one of the Steeles, allowing the other Steele to come in and hit a dropkick for two. Lance gets an armdrag and bars the limb, setting up another tag and more arm work. The Lances go for a double team backdrop after that, but they bump in to each other and argue, allowing Corbin to tag in. He hits a combo stunner/DDT on his knightly opponents and gets a two count on one of them. A slam and a flipping senton are next from Darin, and his tag to Cruz leads in to a double Japanese armdrag. They float over in to a double STO after that, as JJ Dillon looks like he would rather be anywhere else in the world. Cruz comes back in legally after that for a double gutbsuter, but it's no-sold because it hit Lance's "armor." The Express responds with a double dropkick to the head. It looks like Lance is going to rally, but Corbin takes him down with a leaping clothesline, after which the other Lance runs in for a big highspot sequence. Everybody winds up down on the mat, and they're all up at roughly the same time to trade strikes. The Express hit a couple of big head drop moves in stereo, but they can only get two. They try to do the same thing again, but the Steeles reverse in to their Boston crabs. Unfortunately, as they try to adjust their grips, they bump in to each other and allow the Northstars to roll them up for the duke at 7:54. It appears that there is TROUBLE IN CAMELOT after the match.
Match Thoughts: This felt like a carbon copy of the first Northstar Express match in the tournament, just with a few more comedy spots thrown in by the Lance Steeles. Everybody moved well throughout the ring, kept the action going, and didn't take unnecessary rest periods. Yet, at the same time, it got a little dull because it's the exact same type of match that has been dominating the tournament since bout one of night one. I guess that's the problem with so many guys in the promotion coming out of the same training camp . . . you're only going to have so much diversity in terms of style. Fortunately there are a lot of outsiders advancing, so this problem of monotony has been broken up in the later rounds and will probably only be alleviated more once night three rolls around. **
Match Numero Deis: Team FIST vs. Men@Work
As Storm and Zero are coming through the entranceway, Icarus and Akum leap out of the ring and take them down with simultaneous topes. Akuma and storm wind up in the ring after that, and Storm gets the advantage with a roaring elbow. That knocks Akuma out of the ring, and Shane gets in a tope of his own as Zero and Icarus hit the ring. Zero plants him with an inverted powerbomb and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker, after which the Winged Warrior is bodyslammed and put in to a crossface. Icarus makes the ropes, resulting in Storm being tagged in. He gets drop toe holded in to the ropes, and FIST hits a sit-down splash/running dropkick one-toe combo. Akuma takes over after that, continuing to kick away at Storm's head and chest. A senton from Akuma also connects, and Icarus is in for a chinlock. Akuma tags in while the hold is still applied, and he goes for a dropkick but doesn't really connect. Akuma then lays his man out over the top rope and comes off the turnbuckles with a double stomp on to him. More kicking ensues, and Akuma follows it up with a unique facejam which is done entirely with his legs. There's the exchange to Icarus, and he goes back to the chinlock. He goes for a senton after that, but Storm gets the knees up! He gets in a tag to Zero, but Icarus was holding on to the referee's leg and prevented him from seeing it. Akuma comes in, and he starts to dismantle Storm's leg with a spinning toe hold. Storm makes the ropes, but Icarus tags in and drops a leg over the back of his head, setting up a vertical suplex. The front facelock is next from our heel, but Storm makes the ropes out of that as well. Akuma's in for a nice elbowdrop and some more kicking, though a dropkick puts him too close to Mr. Zero.
Zero tags in and backdrops Akuma, who leaves the ring. Icarus is in and tries for a Pedigree, only to be cut off by Storm. Everybody's in now, and there's a wacky spot where Storm jumps off of Akuma's back, then off of Zero's back, and in to a Shining Wizard on Icarus. That leaves Zero and Akuma in the ring, as Akuma gets a nice dropkick and tries for a tornado DDT. It's blocked, and Zero gets the Hama-Chan Cutter. I have to give Mike Quackenbush a lot of credit for getting the name of that one right while on commentary. Akuma comes right back after it, though, and he rolls the dice before hitting a frog splash for two. Zero and Akuma head to the outside, brining Icarus and Storm back in. Shane works in the Kryptonite Crunch off of an Irish whip, but Akuma saves. Akuma also hits Shane with a DDT, but Zero cuts off a moonsault attempted by Icarus. The joke is on him, though, as Icarus responds with a TORNADO PEDIGREE TO THE FLOOR! Wow, spot of the night. Storm hits some kicks on the inside and applies a crossface. Storm makes the ropes, which was pretty surprising. Then, with Icarus back in the ring, FIST hits a spear/kneelift combo in the corner and then a double dropkick. They go for the dogpile pin . . . and it only gets two! Storm tries to Hulk up and hits Germans on both FIST members, followed by Shining Wizards for both men. He's too weak to go for the cover, though. All three men are up at the same time, and FIST kicks the hell out of Storm. Icarus gets a lungblower, Akuma gets the Code Red, and that's it at 15:35.
Match Thoughts: Now THIS was a quality tag team encounter, ladies and gentlemen. It had just about everything you could hope for. It kicked off with a high impact beginning as the teams worked a decent brawl and then settled in to an extended heat sequence on Shane Storm that featured multiple teases at the hot tag which just didn't quite make. (As opposed to many other tournament matches, where the first hot tag attempt was successful.) Then, after the hot tag was made, it looked like the faces had things well in hand . . . until the big twist of the tornado pedigree on Zero. It was the perfect spot to work in to that position, as it was original, eye popping, and something that even the most cynical of smark crowds would buy as a move that could lay a man out for many, many minutes. Suddenly, after fighting through the majority of the match to get his partner back on his side, Shane Storm was once again left to fight off both members of Team FIST. He showed good heart in doing so, timing his hope spots perfectly and providing a few dramatic false finishes to the match. It could probably be argued that he kicked out of too much towards the end, but there was an actual crowd response to what he was doing, so I can't chastise anybody too harshly for it. If I had any complaint it would be that the tag rules got ignored a bit too much in the final minute or so, even with the lucha rules being figured in to the equation. Really, though, I'd call this the match of the tournament so far. There were other bouts with stiffer strikes, sicker bumps, or funnier comedy, but this combined all of the above and told the best story up to this point. ****
God, something just feels odd about rating a match involving the Men@Work as highly as I rated the Wrestlemania XX main events.
Match Numero Once: Jigsaw & Arik Cannon vs. Osamu Nishimura & Katsushi Takemura
It's Jigsaw and Takemura as the opening bell rings, with token matwork galore. Takemura controls it and then hits an early belly to belly to open up the offense. Jigsaw responds with a leg lariat and tags in Cannon, who is backed in to the Muga corner for a tag to Nishimura. He slaps on a headlock and takes the Anarchist down, and that segues in to a passable sequence of reversals. Nish backs Cannon in to the corner off of a cravat to end that one. Osamu then starts lighting his man up with the European uppercuts, which almost give Dory Funk's a run for their money. Almost. Takemura's back in after that, and he unloads with forearms and a dropkick for two before bringing Nishimura back in. The veteran briefly applies a sleeper before going in to a version of the Indian deathlock, and Cannon does a good job of selling it. Takemura's back in for a slam and a slingshot senton, but it can only get a two count. He continues the work on Cannon's leg after that, applying a toe hold. He tries to send Arik off the ropes after that, but it's reversed and turned in to a neckbreaker. That sets up a tag to Jigsaw, who bars the arm but does it a little too close to the ropes for his own good. Jig goes for a variation on the surfboard after that, but Takemura blocks the hold in a unique manner, essentially rolling himself up in to a ball on the mat. Perhaps a bit frustrated, Jigsaw tags Cannon back in, and Arik strikes away before hitting a jumping back elbow. He goes to an odd submission after that one, stretching his man out like nobody's business. Katsushi manages to roll to the ropes, which only serves to put him in perfect position for a Jigsaw slingshot double stomp. Jig goes back to the toehold after that, and the ropes are made again. There's another switch to Cannon, and the two men trade some slaps. Cannon goes for a backdrop suplex but is foiled, though his subsequent lariat hits and sets up another tag to Jigsaw. He drops a corkscrew elbow and slaps on a chinlock, but Takemura is in the ropes once more. Jigsaw's running knee in the corner connects after that, and Cannon follows it up with a Stinger splash. Or he tries to at least, as the move misses.
Takemura tries to mount a comeback with a Lyger-esque somersault kick, and that sets up the hot tag to Nishimura. Jigsaw is in as well, and he is uppercutted in to oblivion. A pair of shinbusters are next from the veteran, but he misses a top rope kneedrop. Jigsaw tries to take over with kicks to the leg of Osamu, and then he takes him down with a superkick. Jig heads up top and misses the guillotine legdrop, allowing Nish to work in the dragon screw. That sets up the figure four, and Cannon gets the same from Takemura. Jigsaw taps out at 15:27.
Match Thoughts: This match really came off as a breath of fresh air after watching the bulk of the show. After seeing multiple quasi-lucharesu matches put on by the Chikara regulars and the insane highspots in the last match, it was refreshing to see four guys go out there and take it at a slower pace. Though in terms of rating the match itself I should probably view it in isolation from the rest of the show, I give kudos to the folks putting together the evening if this was an intentional choice. When reviewing the bout on its own terms, I also have to speak highly of it. It was very smartly wrestled, as the participants seemed to know that they were in front of a crowd who could appreciate mat wrestling and gave them just that. However, they also knew when to pepper in highspots like Jigsaw's double stomp or Cannon's backdrop attempts, which kept things from getting too monotonous. The Chikara team worked together nicely as well, with their leg work on Takemura generally making sense and building up to the hot tag nicely. The finish was also very well put together. Jigsaw hadn't had his leg worked on for the whole match, but he took so much damage to it in the last minute or two that you could really believe he would tap out to a well applying figure four when he did. This was well done and made me want to see Team Muga mixing it up with more experienced opponents. **3/4
Match Numero Doce: Milano Collection AT & Skayde vs. Amigo Suzuki & Shinjitsu Nohashi
It's interesting to note that Skayde can be credited with training the other three men in this matchup. We've got some international flavor to start, as Milano and Amigo hit the ring. Suzuki works the arm a little bit, and we get some reversals based off of that. Suzuki scores a couple of quick nearfalls while we're on the mat, and then we get tags to both men's partners. Nohashi lands a couple of surprisingly quick armdrags, but Skayde responds with a takedown of his own and a hammerlock and a leg submission. That segues in to the STF, but Nohashi busts out of it quickly and gets back to his feet. They do a GREAT quick reversal sequence off of the ropes after this, which culminates in Skayde armdragging his man around the ring. He turns his back on Nohashi for a brief second, though, and the monk goes for the ropewalk. Skayde dodges the chop from the top, does a celebratory flip, and here come Amigo and Milano again. AT turns a headscissor in to a victory roll, and the two men exchange rapid fire pinfalls. Nohashi tries to run in to save his partner, but Milano takes him down and simultaneously puts both Toryumon representatives in to the same Boston crab. Nohashi rolls out of the ring when the hold is released, allowing his partner to get chopped all to hell. Skayde tags in after that, and he and Milano flip Suzuki in to a wacky double team submission. Nohashi tries to save again, so Skayde hits him with a face buster and then Milano ties him up around the bottom rope to set up a hiiiiiiigh elevation dropkick.
Now we've got Suzuki and Skayde in the ring, with Amigo going to the eyes and headbutting away. He tags out to Nohashi, after which the two men take turns hitting avalanche strikes in the corner, which they follow up with a double headbutt. A double drop toe hold is next for the bad guys, and they drop their heads in to their trainer's lower back. Nohashi stays in, hitting a DDT and rolling through in to a wristlock. Suzuki comes off of the top with a double axe to Skayde's back as the bad guys remain in control. He follows it up with another headbutt, and then Team Toryumon join forces for an inverted powerbomb/bulldog combo. Nohashi and Suzuki go for the avalanche strikes again after that, but Skayde moves and suckers Amigo in to dropkicking his own partner. A headscissor on Nohashi finally gets us our tag to Milano. The Italian runs wild with lariats for everybody and a pretty handspring in the middle of it all. Suzuki is hit with a tight enzuguri that sends him out ot the floor, and Skayde follows that up with a tope con hilo. That leaves Nohashi in there with Mr. AT, and Milano lands a senton. Nohashi responds with a big forearm in the corner and a cross body block, but that's not enough for the pin. He jumps in to Milano's feet while attempting a top rope headbutt, and Suzuki runs in to take out Milano. Skayde saves, dropping a leg on the back of Amigo's head and whirlybirding him out of an Alabama slam position. A surfboard variation is next from the Dragon Gym trainer, which he eventually turns in to a variant on the figure four. Suzuki makes the ropes after much struggling, and he comes back with a jawbreaker. The world's slooooowest tiger suplex follows, but Milano saves and takes over the ring. The bad guys hit a headbutting version of Total Elimination, and there's a double team praying powerbomb. Team Toryumon hits stereo swandive headbutts after that, but Skayde makes the save at the very last second.
Nohashi and Milano are left in the ring, and the mini-monk heads up top. Skayde cuts him off, allowing Milano to hit the Hama-Chan Cutter. That sets up an enzuguri, a pancake, and the pinfall at 20:00 flat.
Match Thoughts: This is one of the few matches I've watched where my favorite part was actually the opening as opposed to the middle or the finish. I couldn't accurately describe it all here, but these four men were doing some impressive exchanges on the mat and off the ropes the likes of which I've never seen before in my many years as a professional wrestling fan. I haven't seen any T2P/Dragon Door, but apparently that's one of their trademarks . . . I may just have to buy some of their stuff now. The rest of the bout was solid as well, with a decent heat sequence on Skayde, followed up by an action packed finish. I did have a few problems with the last half of the match, though, as Team Toryumon's headbutt-based offense got a little bit repetitive and the tag team structure completely broke down in to a bunch of guys just hitting moves to hit moves. Still, though, I have to give them a lot of credit for the pace and the believability of the false finishes. ***
That's the show, kids.
Final Thoughts
Number of Matches: 12 Highest Star Rating: **** Lowest Star Rating: 1/4* Average Star Rating: **
Well, night one was a darn good show, but night two managed to up the ante and do even better than its predecessor. As I mentioned a few times above, there were points during the card at which it felt like we were just seeing the same match trotted out again and again, particularly during the first round. However, as soon as that feeling started to set in, the next match would automatically deliver something completely different in order to snap my boredom. The variety of wrestlers presented was definitely helpful in that regard, and it's a lesson that certain national wrestling promotions with entirely homogenous talent rosters should learn from. As far as the matches on the card go, I will admit that there were a few bouts that left me less than thrilled. However, not much was actually disappointing. The matches that you knew were going to be quick or mostly comedy were quick or mostly comedy. Meanwhile, the matches that you would expect to be good delivered, and even then they were better than I would have given them credit for on paper, especially the Men@Work vs. FIST encounter. In fact, I'd go as far as saying that one match is worth half of the DVD's purchase price on its own. The other $10 is more than made up for by the rest of the card, particularly the excellent performances from Skayde, Milano Collection AT, Nishimura, and the comedic stylings of Lance Steele and Lance Steele.
Night one was easy to recommend. Night two was even easier to recommend. Tune in next week to see if night three continues the upward trend.
