Cheap Wrestling for Cheap People 06.15.06: Really Deep Discounts
Posted by Ryan Byers on 06.15.2006
It's documentary time as Killer Kowalski screams, Great Moolah kayfabes, and Hulk Hogan lies out his ass. Really, it's all par for the course.
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to Cheap Wrestling for Cheap People. I'm Ryan Byers, and I'm sick of attempting to come up with chipper openings for this column every week. Because of that, I'm heading right in to the content, which includes your usual Cheap Wrestling tip/review, as well as the results form our trivia contest of two weeks ago. Hopefully you all enjoy it.
Cheap Wrestling Tip #42: Deep Discount DVD Summer Sale
In the past, I've discussed DeepDiscountDVD.com, perhaps the single cheapest place on the internet to find DVDs. They've always had a fabulous wrestling selection available, including some lucha and other smaller promotions that are difficult to find elsewhere. If you thought things were cheap before, though, they're about to get a whole hell of a lot cheaper. Until June 17, 2006, Deep Discount has an additional sale for 20% off of just about their entire stock. All you have to do is enter one of the following sale codes when you're checking out:
So, what was I able to find as I dug through this pit of reasonably priced digital video discs? Read and learn.
Title: The Unreal Story of Pro Wrestling Released By: A&E Release Year: 1998 Run Time: 100 minutes Found At:Deep Discount DVD Price: $9.57
For those of you who are not familiar with this documentary, it came out at the height of the last wrestling boom, 1998. It aired in prime time on A&E on a Monday night, right up there with Raw and Nitro. It was obviously the Arts and Entertainment network's attempt at cashing in on the hype surrounding pro wrestling at the time and was flanked by several wrestling-related episodes of the television show Biography. Sadly, to the best of my knowledge, none of those are out on DVD, but this Steve Allen narrated program is. Let's take a look at it.
The basic question is first: What is professional wrestling? Amateur wrestler Dan Gable is the first to answer the question. You don't know about Dan Gable? ASK MR. KURT ANGLE ABOUT MR. DAN GABLE! He discusses wrestling as though he wants no part of this documentary. Meanwhile, Dusty Rhodes and Jerry Lawler let us in on the "secret" that actual fans already know – wrestling isn't an actual athletic competition. Verne Gange appears, and he goes as far as suggesting that wrestling should have score keepers at ringside holding up cards rating the execution of moves. Vince McMahon notes that wrestling is like a magic show, so he won't let anybody know how wrestlers perform their "secrets." Obviously this was done before he decided to run Tough Enough.
With some of the basics established, we go back to wrestling's origins with the ancient Egyptians, Greeks, and Romans. This is interspersed with modern clips of Goldust, the Undertaker, and Faarooq, which looks pretty silly. Then it's off to early America, as the documentary just has to bring up Abraham Lincoln's history as a wrestler, as if he was the pre-Civil War version of Andre the Giant. We skip even further forward, and here's the requisite discussion of Gotch/Hackenschmidt. Sadly Farmer Burns is ignored, because that man's facial hair needs to be showcased on national television at some point. Lou Thesz is interviewed, and he tells the story of Gotch paying off Hack's sparring partner to take him out before a big match between the two wrestlers. The film speaks about it as though it was a complete shoot, which is actually something that is in debate. The controversy, combined with the length of the matches (upward of two hours in some cases) are blamed for a brief lapse in professional wrestling's popularity.
Now it's on to the carnivals and their version of wrestling, particularly the "hookers" who would take out the most dangerous local challengers. Thesz runs down a list of famous hookers, and there's our mention of Farmer Burns. Eventually carnival promoters became wrestling promoters, and with them came an individual named Ed "Strangler" Louis. He teamed up with Ed Sandow and Toots Mondt, and the group allegedly revolutionized wrestling by developing concepts like time limited matches and territories. Fueled by those ideas, Louis became the most notable World Champion since Frank Gotch, and this was allegedly the point at which legitimate professional wrestling completely died. Much like the claim about Hackenschmidt's leg being injured, this is something that is highly in dispute. In fact, there is evidence being uncovered that professional wrestling matches were rigged as far back as the mid-1800's.
Despite the fact that this new breed of wrestling was popular, it all died when the Great Depression and a revelation of wrestling's secrets lead to another downswing in business. That was right around the same time that Lou Thesz burst on to the scene, though, and he's dubbed the "Last of the Hookers." He wasn't quite enough to pull wrestling out of its slump, though television was. Thus, things picked up again in the 1940s. The characters were amped up with the introduction of television, as Killer Kowalski quickly shows us by going over the top and yelling at the camera while being interviewed for the documentary. One of those characters was Fred Blassie, and he introduces us to "Gorgeous" George Wagner, one of the biggest stars of the early television era thanks to his bleached blond hair and gaudy robes. Verne Gange seemed to be a big fan of his schtick, getting a good chuckle out of it even today. We get footage of Geroge doing the JOB to an airplane spin of all things, and there are stills of his hair match against "Whipper" Billy Watson.
"Nature Boy" Buddy Rogers is up next, though he doesn't get credit for much aside from influencing Ric Flair. Antonina Rocca is after that, and he's put over as one of the first in-ring "acrobats," complete with quality footage of some of his surprisingly modern-looking highspots. Then it's time for two-time NCAA Champion and former Olympian Vern Gange. He discusses his first match, in which he legitimately had his rear end handed to him, which the documentary tells us was common practice for older wrestlers in that era. Hell, with guys like Hardcore Holly and Bradsaw running around, I don't think that the practice ever really stopped.
Television also brought about the professional wrestling interview, which quickly became a big part of every wrestler's game. This includes a hilarious clip of a couple of German wrestlers failing miserably to cut a promo in English and even better footage of Angelo Poffo looking like he wants to kill an interviewer who mistakes him for another wrestler. This somehow turns to a discussion of wrestling's most prolific "bad guys," including Killer Kowalski, Hans Schmidt, and Fred Blassie. You could probably do separate documentaries about all three of those guys, but they're limited to about one minute of airtime here.
And now let's talk about the ladies! Mae Young discusses women's wrestling at the time that she broke in, which was dominated by Mildred Burke, who married a promoter and was thus guaranteed a long run as champion. The next major women's star was the Great Moolah, who is also on hand to talk about her involvement in the sport. She claims that she's still the Women's World Champion at the time of the documentary's filming, and I guess that there could theoretically be some version of the title that she never lost. There's plenty of Moolah footage from the WWF, which is followed for a couple of seconds by discussion of the modern role of females in wrestling.
Now we're up to the 1960's in our overview of wrestling's history, and that brings us to Gorilla Monsoon and the "superheavyweight." Midget wrestling gets a nod as well, though it's made clear that it was nothing more than a novelty act.
They use that as a springboard to talk about wrestling becoming even more cartoonish, which somehow turns in to a recap of the AWESOME feud between the Iron Sheik and Sergeant Slaughter. If you haven't seen their matches, ladies and gentlemen, you need to hunt one or all of them down immediately.
Up next: Andre the Giant! Really, if you want to see a great A&E piece on Andre, just hunt down his episode of the Biography series. They run down all of the usual vital statistics for Andre – ring size, shoe size, most beers in a sitting, etc. He serves as our bridge in to Vince McMahon's national wrestling expansion, which of course made him none too popular in the rest of the wrestling world. Verne discusses using national syndication and video taping just like McMahon did, though unfortunately we don't get much discussion of how the WWF ran him out of business. Eric Bischoff makes his first appearance as well, discussing the importance of cable television to what wrestling would become. Bischoff's buddy Hulk Hogan chimes in as well, ironically talking about how wrestlers always give "110%" when they go out to perform. Practice what you preach, brother.
Of course, Vince continued to win the wrestling wars, and here's some of Verne's bitterness, as he talks about the theft of Hulk Hogan. Dusty Rhodes of all people informs us about the effectiveness of Hulk's character, and Gorilla Monsoon outright states that the guy was not the best technical wrestler of all time. Lou Thesz concurs, saying that his grandmother could have pulled off a better legdrop. The Hulkster then tells the story of Hiro Matsuda breaking his leg, though Hiro is not mentioned by name. Hogan discusses working the crowd as though he invented it, and the greatest example of that came at Wrestlemania III. It's Hogan vs. Andre, and the Hulkster makes his ridiculous claim that the Giant died "shortly after" the match, despite the fact that it was several years later. The documentary also discusses how Andre "lost his title" to Hogan that evening, and both the Hulkster and Vince McMahon were scared about how Andre might have changed the outcome of the match without their knowledge. Yeah, whatever.
Now we've got discussion of wrestling's 1980's popularity more generally. The formation of WCW is mentioned, and we somehow fast forward directly in to the Monday Nitro era. The abysmal period of professional wrestling that was the early 90's gets completely ignored. Modern wrestling is then discussed by some of the old timers, and they note for about the five thousandth time that professional wrestling no longer has any relationship to its old roots with the hookers and shooters. They do note that there is still a very real physical risk despite this fact and despite the fact that professional wrestlers are working together when they compete. A few different individuals run down laundry lists of their injuries, and Lou Thesz even gets an opportunity to describe what cauliflower ear is.
Modern wrestling training schools also get a mention, and there's plenty of fooage from the WCW Power Plant, including trainers Mike Wenner and Sgt. Buddy Lee Parker. Blink and you'll miss young trainee Dale "The Demon" Tolborg. A lot of other trainees, most of whom who have glorious mullets, drop out of school but all promise that they'll be back. I don't believe that any of them actually went anywhere.
The program also notes that wrestling often spills outside of the ring now, including a lot of footage of the Wrestlemania "Backlot Brawl" between Roddy Piper and Goldust, as well as the Hog Pen match between Triple H and Henry Godwinn. Jesus, that one needs to get put out on a DVD sooner rather than later. Despite the evolution of the "sport," the documentary notes that there are still some ultimate truths of wrestling – referees are incompetent, chairs get cracked in to people's heads, and wrestling in cages is always fun. The question of what keeps fans coming back is then asked, and it's answered by some sort of college professor, who says that professional wrestling is all about the developmental of rituals.
The show then concludes with one of the many authors on the documentary panel making a bizarre observation – that, towards the end of the Roman Empire, the sort of entertainment in which citizens began to indulge themselves became more bloody and violent. He compares this to professional wrestling, which was at the height of its popularity when this documentary was first aired. It seems odd to leave a bunch of wrestling fans with the thought that their preferred form of entertainment may be an indicator of the downfall of modern society. I don't know how it would endear viewers to your product . . . but, then again, I don't produce documentaries for a major cable network, so what do I know?
Overall
Well, this certainly wasn't a terrible time, though I don't know that I need to see it more than once every five or six years. In a lot of ways, it provides a nice link to the past, as guys like Blassie, Monsoon, and Thesz have since passed away and Verne Gange's mind has apparently begun to go. It's nice to see those men describe their craft a bit, even if it is slightly edited. What we as wrestling fans really need to do is petition A&E to release the uncut interview footage with those guys. That'd be some wrestling history right there. Aside from the old men, the best part of the show had to be the old footage. Again, despite the editing, you aren't going to run in to a lot of sources through which you can see the pre-1970's clips that were woven in to the documentary's story.
Outside of the novelty of seeing those two things, though, the documentary doesn't have that much to offer somebody that is already a fan of professional wrestling. The whole thing seems to be built on telling the story of how professional wrestling is not "real" but is instead viewed by its followers because of the entertainment value. Personally, I thought that this was common knowledge in 1998, and I don't know why 75% of the program here had to beat us over the head with that fact. Documentaries like Beyond the Mat are clearly superior, though it can be interesting to watch this one to see what exactly non-wrestling fans think that it is important for other non-wrestling fans to know about professional wrestling.
Overall, I wouldn't spend more than $5 on this one, which sadly is a bit more than what Deep Discount DVD is charging for it. However, just because this particular purchase was a bust doesn't mean that there isn't some quality stuff for sale over there. Check it out before the big sale ends on Saturday.
The other thing you should check out are our answers to the last trivia contest, which was one by Desmond W. of Cleveland, Ohio. His copy of Ric Flair: Two Decades of Excellence is on its way. Thanks to all of you who participated, and now you should be able to tell just how you did.
1.) Who was the fist man to hold the three major WWF Titles (World, IC, Tag Team) as well as the first three major WCW Titles (World, US, Tag Team)?
The answer is Bret Hart. A lot of people forget about his WCW Tag Team Title reign with Bill Goldberg, but it did in fact happen.
2.) There was something queer about the way that Pat Patterson used to blade during his wrestling career. What was it? (Hint: Find a recent picture of his forehead.)
Usually wrestlers blade but cutting a horizontal line along the creases in their forehead. Patterson would cut two or three vertical lines directly above his eye. Shawn Michaels has also taken to using this method recently.
3.) What luchadore briefly changed his name to Galaxy while working for WCW?
That was Damien 666. WCW ultimately broke down and let him use the Damien name, but they never let him tack the 666 on.
4.) Members of what two factions came together to form the original version of FMW's Team No Respect?
Team ZEN and Fuyuki-Gun. Fuyuki's got a gun. The whole world's come undone. Fuyuki's got a gun.
5.) How many times has All Japan's Real World Tag Team tournament been won by an all-Ameican team?
Thirteen. The most recent US combination to take home top honors was Team 3-D in last year's tournament.
6.) Which two men comprised the short-lived WCW tag team of Rough and Ready, managed by Col. Robert Parker?
Mike Enos and "Dirty" Dick Slater. When I was a teenager I thought that "Dirty Dick" was one of the funniest names in history.
7.) There was a period during which WCW Saturday Night would feature a weekly nWo match in which a member of the faction would face off against a jobber in an empty arena. Who was the only man to do job duty in two nWo matches?
"Pistol" Pez Whatley. A lot of people complained about those nWo squash matches, but I thought they were hilarious, particularly with Kevin Nash and Scott Hall on commentary. I wish that I could get a few of those on tape.
8.) Perhaps one of the most well-remembered moments in WWF history is Jimmy Snuka diving off the top of a steel cage on to Don Muraco. This was not, however, the first time that Snuka attempted a cage dive, and it wouldn't be the last. Who was Snuka's first WWF cage dive against, and who did he drop one on during a 2000 episode of Monday Nitro?
Bob Backlund was the first, and Jeff Jarrett was the man to take the move in 2000.
9.) From the same era of WCW history, what group of men were known as the Old Age Outlaws?
There were four men in total, and they all teamed up to make life hell for the silver & black version of the nWo: Terry Funk, Arn Anderson, Paul Orndorff, & Larry Zbyszko.
10.) At the halfway point, I'll give you an easy one. Which of the following men is not related: Afa, Jamal, Rikishi, Gary Albright, and Peter Maivia.
I thought this was easy, but a lot of people got it wrong. Peter Maivia has no blood or martial relationship to anybody else in the group. He did get Afa and Sika in to the business and there's a kayfabed relationship between the three, but it's not legitimate. Gary Albright is related to everybody else on the list by marriage.
11.) What wrestler has appeared in the most King of the Ring tournaments?
Bobcore Holly.
12.) What old school heel wrestler had a gimmick in which he would eat live goldfish that he named after his babyface opponents? (I swear I'm not making this one up.)
Lonnie "Moondog" Mayne. He did this in Roy Shires' promotion in California.
13.) What former FMW mainstay went through a period where he became a Bret Hart clone, wearing the pink and black as well as using the Sharpshooter and other Hart moves?
Koji Nakagawa
14.) How many female wrestlers have been trained by TAKA Michinoku?
The answer is four.
15.) During their run as NWA Tag Team Champions, Billy Graham and Pat Patterson often wore masks despite the fact that everybody knew who they were and they still went by their real names. Why was this?
In one of my favorite heel gimmicks of all time, the two men wore masks for the sole purpose of sliding foreign objects in to them and headbutting their opponents.
16.) Most people on this website find Gail Kim rather attractive. However, she used to wrestle under a hood much like Graham and Patterson. However, it wasn't for the same reason. What was the name of Kim's masked persona?
La Felina. Tiger Mask she was not. 17.) How long was the match that saw Bruno Sammartino take the WWWF Championship away from "Nature Boy" Buddy Rogers?
0:48. And people complained about Goldberg matches.
18.) What famous mistake did Michael Buffer once make on a WCW pay per view while introducing Bret Hart?
He referred to him as Bret "The Hitman" Clark.
19.) In what month did the first ever Smokey Mountain Wrestling card take place?
It was in July of 1991. I hope it was air conditioned, because July in Tennessee can be hell.
20.) When WCW instituted its Women's Championship, they only actually had one female wrestler. What promotion chipped in the rest of the ladies for the inaugural tournament?
GAEA Japan, which no longer exists.
And that wraps up yet another week for me. I'll be back in seven with more Cheap Wrestling. If everything works out, we'll be touching on some P . . . W . . . G!
