Fink’s Payload 07.27.06: Retirement Angle

Posted by Clarke-Rossi on 07.27.2006

Chris and Mark decide that not even they can help the WWE product and decide to call it a day

Yes folks, this is the end. After much debate (actually it was probably this five minute conversation over MSN that consisted of: Chris: "Do you want to stop doing the Payload?" Mark: "Ya" Chris: "Ok this week is the last week" Mark: "Good, now I can tear the product a dozen assholes".)

So there will be no grand send off, no endless quoting of song lyrics making us feel all self important about our piddly little wrestling column.

Nope, this is the end…my only friend…the end.

Shit, I thought we might be able to get out of this without quoting The Doors, but oh well. To close this out, let us both say we've enjoyed this experience, it's given us focus on our wrestling related MSN conversations, and for one of us (Mark) it's actually put off our giving up on the product altogether by almost a year. Before we get into our own little rants, first let us say that the Ref-bump-o-meter will live on in Ask 411 (which Chris writes). I also think we'll both pop up with guest column spots from time to time when the situation presents itself, but neither of us have the interest in keeping this column alive. As well, we do have plans to keep the Bookie Awards alive for this year as well, just to make it a yearly feature on 411.

Now it's rant time, first up, Mark:

As any long time reader of this column has probably noticed, my responses to questions in this column have become shorter and shorter as we've gone on. Let me give you a little bit of background on my wrestling watching. Around the time we started the Payload almost a year and a half ago, my interest in wrestling was waning. At that point I was watching Raw semi-regularly and not watching SD! at all (I have not watched SD! Since Paul Heyman stopped booking the show around 2002 I believe, I did up to the fall of 2005 read the reports just to keep up). I took this column as an opportunity to hopefully reinvigorate my fandom.

At first I started watching Raw every week again, and sometimes turning on SD! to see what was happening. But after a month, I was right back to where I was before, casually watching Raw and never watching SD!. And forget about buying PPV's, I hadn't paid money for those in years. There were so many times over the course of this column where I had discussions with Chris over how I was basically done with wrestling. Prime examples of this are Kerwin White, The mishandling of Christian, and taking the title off Edge when it was obvious to anyone with half a brain that he was the hottest thing they had in years. Throughout this, I barely even paid attention to SD!, so much to the point that I even stopped reading reports on the show six months ago (Chris has to give me updates periodically on what's going on).

Since around May, a few things have gone on which almost brought me back into the fan-fold, but at the same time killed me of once and for all. First, like many of you I was excited about the prospect of ECW coming back. Sure it was going to be under the WWE banner, and it wasn't going to be like the old ECW, but heck, if Heyman's booking it it will at least be something different then the same stale crap they put on TV every week. My excitement was quickly replaced by disappointment, then outright anger once the product actually got on TV. I stuck with it for a few weeks, trying to give it a chance to be something, anything. But in the end, when I watched an ECW show at ECW Arena where the three guys that went over were Mike Knox, Test, and The Big Show, that pretty much killed any interest I was ever going to have in watching this ‘ECW'. ECW is now nothing more then a pathetic punch line to how god awful the WWE product is these days. The other thing that happened was that I moved to a new house, and my girlfriend and I decided not to bother getting cable (it was free in my last apartment). I'm not much of a TV watcher (outside of wrestling, and even that was few and far between) and neither is she, so it didn't make sense to waste money on it. So we didn't. The first week of May I was invited to a friends house to watch Raw, I did so, the show sucked the bag. That was the last episode of WWE TV I have seen. I believe I have a standing invitation to watch Raw any time I want (correct me if I'm wrong, Adam) and I have not done so for three months. I simply don't give a shit anymore.

I have been watching wrestling for more than twenty years. I saw the rise of Hulkamania, the steroid trial, the dark days in the mid 90's, how the Monday night wars ignited the industry to the greatest heights it's ever seen, and how one man egomaniacal behavior has all but destroyed most fans love of wrestling. Think I'm exaggerating? Does anybody remember back in 1999 when the combined ratings between WCW and WWE were over 10.0? Now it's an occasion when Raw breaks 4. That's 60% of the audience that are no longer watching.

Simply put, the WWE is a pathetic shell of what it used to be. Without commenting on how backstage politics are affecting the business, I can say this: The gimmicks suck, they push the wrong people down the fans throats, storylines don't make sense, storylines don't do what they should be doing (which is creating issues and conflict between characters, establishing the stakes, and providing a payoff). The same people are pushed again and again, and they recycle the same garbage over and over until each show and character just bleeds into the next. This is not a small problem, and it will not be easily fixed. Adding more PPV's and TV only treats the symptoms of a much larger problem with the product as a whole. The economics of adding more PPV's to compensate for low buyrates is asking for long term problems.

Half the time I wonder if the WWE product isn't just a big rib on the fans. "Look what horseshit we can put on TV and the same stupid idiots will watch every week". Well, no more I'm afraid, I'm finished. I still plan on watching Summerslam with Chris in a few weeks, and I'll probably come out for Mania, just because it's fun once a year. But otherwise, I no longer consider myself a fan of the WWE.

If someone from the WWE is reading this, please forward this part on to Vince. Fuck you Vince McMahon, fuck you very much. All I ever wanted to do was watch two guys who have an issue get in the ring and settle it, now I can't. You claim to know what the fans want, you don't have the first goddamn clue you fuckin' idiot. I will go take my entertainment buck and spend on something more worthy.

Before I pass this over to Chris, I do want to thank a few people. For one, I want to thank Chris for carrying me through this column, much the same way Ric Flair carries a broomstick. He is the one to thank for it being consistently on time and up to date, I just chimed in most of the time and submitted it at the last minute. I would also like to thank Todd Martin of the Wrestling Observer, who over the past few months is the only reason I have any idea what's happening on Raw. His reports are humourous and insightful, and I highly recommend everyone at least give him a read every once and a while. More often then not his report is better then the actual show itself. That is such a sad, sad statement. I also want to thank J.D. Dunn for his recaps, they're pretty funny and Ashish should feel fortunate to have one of the best new voices in a long time recapping for his site. I want to thank TNA, for at least giving me some hope that someone can run a wrestling promotion that doesn't suck ass. For all their problems (Jarrett having the title being first and formost), they show potential in pushing the right people (Samoa Joe most obviously) and presenting an alternative to the stale and repetitive WWE product. I hope they continue to grow to hopefully become a force in the industry. Finally, I want to thank the UFC and the overall rise in MMA. After years of just being something I had a passing interest in (occasionally reading websites, maybe renting one of their PPV's from time to time), I'm ecstatic to see MMA finally being given the chance to grow into an entertainment form that is worthy of my dollar. I have not purchased a WWE PPV in years, but I just recently purchased UFC 61 (too bad the show stunk). Vince, are you listening?

So that's it, thanks to everyone who ever took the time to submit an idea, I enjoyed reading them all, and maybe some day we'll bring this column back. If anyone ever feels like dropping me a line, give me a shout at [e-mail]. For now, I hope those of you who still watch the WWE get whatever out of it that you get out of it. For me, all I get is a headache.

I've got enough headaches to deal with in everyday life, I don't need my diversion to give me one too.

**

Chris here.

And with that, Markus Tiberus Rossi rides off into the IWC sunset. It's really amazing – I remember back in 1998 when Mark and I first met and found our mutual appreciation for wrestling. For him (and by proxy our third, Daniel) to both be a 2 PPV, no TV yearly WWE fan at this point is just freakin' sad. And you know what? The potential to change things even the slightest bit would totally up the product on TV. Instead, the most fascinating thing about wrestling these days is trying to figure out what's causing everyone's liver problems. Trust me – it ain't the catering department.

As a final thank you, we want to thank the readers of this column who constantly sent in their armchair booking. I really do think that we made some sort of impact, at least in the sense that you know our ideas ended up floating around in the right circles, even if they were ignored. Make sure you keep writing, keep thinking, and next time Ashish wants to hire new writers – write in and get your voice heard. You're the only people keeping this community alive these days. Most have already been driven away.

I hope you've enjoyed the Payload – we lasted 18 months! We're hardcore!

Make sure to check out Ask 411 for the ref-bump-o-metre, and my irreverent humour!

Thanks for reading guys,

Chris & Mark
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