The Shimmy 8.07.06: The One Year Plan - Goldberg in TNA

Posted by Andy Clark on 08.07.2006

What should TNA do if they were to bring Bill Goldberg into the company? Click to find out! Plus, find out how to make an impact in The Great Positivity Debate III: The Sequel That Nobody Wanted!

What up, peeps? Did ya miss me? Yeah, I didn't think so. Anyhow, I'm back from my little break and guess what? That's right, no Report Cards! Yeah, I'm pretty surprised myself. Don't worry, the Report Card Series will be back before you know it…I guaran-damn-tee it. Now before I get started on this week's column, I would like to remind you to send in your questions for the finals of The Great Positivity Debate III: The Sequel That Nobody Wanted. That's right, I kicked Domingo's ass so bad last time they didn't even put me in the tournament. Pussies. In any event, I will be your party host once again, so be sure to write me with your questions.

This week we go into a different realm than what I'm normally accustomed to, the land of the one hour adrenaline rush! Adrenaline rush, adrenaline rush…When gearing up for his role as color analyst for WFA: King of the Streets, Bill Goldberg was peppered with questions regarding him going to TNA. Would he like to go? Had there been negotiations? Was he familiar at all with the product? Newswires would have bits of information regarding Goldberg in TNA, but nothing noteworthy. The majority opinion of the IWC seemed to be that Goldberg would add nothing to TNA outside of a potential match with Samoa Joe.

But what of that match? Surely that would be a huge event for TNA, even if Goldberg isn't exactly a necessity for the company. Do you not think that Goldberg-Joe would garner quite a few PPV buys that may not regularly purchase TNA shows? I believe that match would be a great marquee match for TNA and could really benefit them, provided they promoted it, and subsequently Goldberg, correctly. In order to do so, Goldberg can't come in for a one shot and Samoa Joe must stay strong. Imagine that TNA gives Goldberg a one year contract in the vein of Sting's, with the ultimate goal of making Samoa Joe vs. Goldberg one of the biggest matches in TNA history. The story begins in October at Bound For Glory…

Bound For Glory & Genesis

At Bound For Glory, the biggest show of the year, the announcement is made. Goldberg is coming to TNA. Regardless of how you may feel about Goldberg this is certainly a major announcement. Plus, you have the recent success of Scott Steiner in TNA to rest your hat on; who really thought that that was going to work out as well as it did? Goldberg is an even bigger name than Steiner, even at this point in his career so the impact could be felt right away. Obviously don't have Goldberg show up to the show, especially since he still has some movie business to take care of, but hype it up as a big surprise to add to the PPV buys.

On the Impact after Bound For Glory have Jeff Jarrett run down Goldberg, as he always does with the new guys, and have Jim Cornette make another announcement. Cornette has already made it his goal to destroy Jarrett, so why not make Jarrett face Goldberg in his debut match at Genesis? Also, Cornette needs to ban anyone from interfering in the match so that Jarrett can get what's coming. Be sure to get comments from the rest of the TNA locker room on Goldberg's arrival, and make sure Samoa Joe (who should be NWA Champion by now) has something good to say. Start the build early. Of course you have Goldberg destroy Jarrett in the match, maybe even no sell a guitarshot. Goldberg is 1-0 in TNA and he starts at the top with Jeff Jarrett. Post-match, though, America's Most Wanted (provided they are still together) attacks Goldberg, and with Jarrett joining in it becomes a three-on-one beatdown…until Sting makes the save!

Turning Point

The beatdown from Genesis sets an NWA World Tag Team Title Match for Turning Point. The dream tag team of Goldberg & Sting will challenge America's Most Wanted for the gold! Sting is still caught up in taking out Jarrett's lackeys, as well as helping an old friend in Goldberg. Goldberg & Sting go over of course, and Goldberg has already secured championship gold in TNA. It'll be a good moment, and should pop the Impact Zone crowd, but it should definitely be on the undercard, probably second from the end. At this point they need to be establishing Joe as a great NWA Champion and taking on all challenges. Keep in mind, Joe must stay undefeated in the build to his match with Goldberg, as should Goldberg himself.

Final Resolution

This should be Sting's last match in TNA and he should be in the main event. Being the tag team lover that he is, Jim Cornette books a dream tag team match for the main event of Final Resolution between Goldberg & Sting and Team 3D (or AJ & Daniels, it doesn't really matter). It's a strictly face vs. face match here, which may confuse the Impact Zone a bit, but hey, it'll given them a real reason for dueling chants. The challenging team goes over here, winning the belts, but getting the victory over Sting. Sting needs to put over the new tag team champions while Goldberg, the intense individual that he is, gives a brief nod of acknowledgement to them and walks off. Sting is done in TNA and there is a new, old guy in town.

Against All Odds

It's at this point that Goldberg finds himself face to face with Jarrett's other lackey, his old nemesis, "Big Poppa Pump" Scott Steiner. Steiner can mock Goldberg for losing the tag team titles and mention about how Steiner had beaten him in the past. Steiner needs to get in Goldberg's face and really push his buttons. One brutal pull-apart brawl later and we have our match for Against All Odds. Hopefully they will both be able to stay motivated (this whole plan is contingent on the fact that Goldberg can stay both motivated and injury free for a year, which may be asking a lot). I say the match at against all odds ends in a no contest as both men just brawl like crazy and the ref loses control of the match. This leads us right into…

Destination X

Why not have a Falls Count Anywhere Match? Since TNA is kind of No DQ all the time anyhow (except for interference or guitarshots), a Falls Count Anywhere Match is the de facto No Holds Barred Match for them. Let Goldberg and Steiner beat the holy hell out of each other, and I want to see lots of blood. Goldberg needs to show his vicious streak to let people know that Samoa Joe isn't the only one that kills bitches dead (hell, even let him mention that in an interview!).

Lockdown

I'm kinda stuck on this one, but I know that I'd like to have Goldberg involved in Lethal Lockdown. If "Jarrett's Army" is still together come April then that would be an good opponent given who Goldberg has already been fighting, but instead of Goldberg being the leader like Sting was, he needs to be the secret weapon. Goldberg should be the last person to enter the match and clean house a la the Elimination Chamber and the 2004 Royal Rumble. He doesn't need to necessarily be the one to secure the fall, but it wouldn't matter as long as he looked dominant. Keep on rolling, Goldberg.

Sacrifice

At Sacrifice you can kind of plug in an opponent for Goldberg. I'd suggest Christian Cage as in order to keep Goldberg undefeated I would hate to bury too many of the homegrown TNA stars. Cage and Goldberg worked well during their Steel Cage Match on Raw, even though it was a glorified squash. I'm sure Cage could cut a good heel promo. A win here over a former NWA Champion though should catapult Goldberg into title contention just in time.

Slammiversary

It is now time for the King of the Mountain Match! This is where TNA can really test the waters for the Joe-Goldberg match up as both men will be the in match, along with the three other challengers. The key in this match is to have both men involved, but every time they are about to come to blows something happens to break it up. There needs to be one good staredown between them so as to really milk the crowd and give everyone a good visual. Joe obviously wins here to remain undefeated for two years and to be the first champion ever to retain his title in the King of the Mountain Match. The seeds are officially sown for the huge main event later on.

Victory Road

It would be tempting to do another Road to Victory Match here as it could possibly be a yearly event, but I like the idea of actually giving Goldberg at least one TNA opponent during his year tenure. What better TNA opponent than one that never gets hurt by a loss, none other than "The Monster" Abyss? I actually like the idea of this carrying over from the Christian Cage feud, with Cage making a deal with the devil to extract some revenge on Goldberg. Abyss will lose here, but I like the idea of putting over Abyss a bit by having him be the first person in TNA to kick out of the Spear. Goldberg-Abyss would be a fun brawl and I could see Abyss actually making Goldberg look beaten.

Hard Justice

And this violent feud will continue at Hard Justice! Abyss needs to ambush Goldberg with his patented chain and leave Goldberg in a pool of his own blood. This sets up the ever popular Dog Collar Match between these two goliaths. Abyss can take an insane amount of punishment and this is the match to showcase it. Hopefully this will be one of those matches where a wrestler will look even better in defeat then they would in victory, allowing both wrestlers to gain something from this match.

No Surrender

This is the last stop before Bound For Glory and this is where Goldberg becomes the #1 Contender. A twenty man Gauntlet for the Gold Match is held here at No Surrender, with the winner facing Samoa Joe for the NWA World Heavyweight Title at Bound For Glory. The match comes down to Goldberg and an exhausted Christopher Daniels who had already competed once in the evening and entered number one in the Gauntlet, allowing for Goldberg to get the win and become the new #1 Contender. Samoa Joe can even come out on the ramp to watch the final moments of the Gauntlet, scouting his opponent for the next month and having an intense staredown with Goldberg.

Bound For Glory

And here comes the big showdown. There needn't be much interaction leading up to the match, and TNA could go multiple routes to the match. They could have Joe and Goldberg team up for an episode of Impact (old school Saturday Night's Main Event style), they could have a contract signing, a face to face promo, or just separate taped promos leading up to the match , anything that would build anticipation would be a good thing. If they could, getting Spike TV involved in the promotion of the match would help out a lot, maybe even one of those preview shows that they do for the UFC PPVs. It might be interesting to bring Tito Ortiz back to referee as it would involve three of the baddest men on the planet. Going in Joe could claim that he will force Goldberg to tap out, adding even more intrigue to the match. I would expect the match to be pretty stiff, with Joe winning and retaining his title following an Island Driver. The important thing is that Goldberg does not tap out in this match allowing for the rematch the following month.

Genesis

One year later, and this is Goldberg's last TNA appearance. Joe-Goldberg II should also get a lot of hype, but not quite to the extent of Bound For Glory. Hopefully the first match would have provided a good enough buyrate to warrant a rematch, but at this point TNA would want to get their money's worth out of Goldberg. If I had to guess the second match won't be quite as good as the first (when are they ever?) but the difference is that this time Goldberg taps out to the Koquina (Kokina?) Clutch. Post-match Goldberg puts Joe over and exits the company, hopefully leaving it in better shape as far as national publicity than when he arrived.

So what do you think? Would Golberg in TNA work? Would you change any of my booking? Drop me a line and let me know.

A Reason For Bullet Points

I'm saying it now: Mick Foley vs. Ric Flair is the feud of the year so far. The promos have been insane (especially on Mick's part), the post-match attack at Vengeance was great, the overall storytelling has been excellent, and I'm sure the concluding match will be awesome. I was already a mark for this feud even before it got good, but now I don't know how anyone isn't on board. Great suff.

Speaking of which, how is Mick Foley not the face in this match? He makes fun of George Bush and is friends with a pornstar? Brilliant!

So Hulk Hogan may be out of his SummerSlam match with Randy Orton. I kind of feel bad for Hogan just as I felt bad for Kevin Nash back at Bound For Glory. After years of being political backstage and allegedly refusing to job, both men have gained sort of a "boy who cried wolf" deal. Even if Hogan is legitimately hurt everyone's initial reaction is "Oh, looks like he got a cause of jobitis." I was looking forward to that match and hope Hogan can rebound from what could be a bad injury.

You know, between (potentially) Hogan-Orton and the Great American Bash WWE sure has been getting a lot of use out of "card subject to change."

Chavo Guerrero finally explained his heel turn on Friday and quite frankly it made a lot of sense. I hope they actually use Chavo as a legitimate main event heel because not only does SmackDown need him, I feel like he could do well with the role.

So long, Royal Court. We hardly knew ye. WWE felt compelled to needlessly stretch out this Finlay-Regal "feud" and as a result one of the most promising stables in recent years is no more. Great job, guys.

Like a proud father I must direct your attention to this discussion post from the 411 forums started by yours truly. I won't go off on my rant on ECW fans here because by this point my hatred of you should be clear. However, I will share with you my opening comments from the post:

"I had hope. I had hope that you people would at least try to enjoy the main event. I had hope that you people would at least give a match that, even though Joey Styles has pretty much said it about every main event for the past four weeks, really would be WrestleMania worthy (if you don't believe me think back to how they were booking Batista and Big Show against one another around Survivor Series). But no. You proved once again that you are a bunch of spoiled, self-centered babies that cries whenever you get something that doesn't meet your limited set of standards. I'm not saying Big Show-Batista was a great match, but it's not like you people would have cared anyhow. You made up your minds going in and that was all. I heard you New Yorkers chanting "Boring" during the match, but how is it that you could tell? I mean you were so caught up in your own act I find it hard to believe you were even paying attention to what was going on in the ring. Quite frankly I wouldn't have been surprised if both men intentionally dogged the end of the match, especially Batista, given the complete lack of respect you gave them. And for what? This isn't Lesnar-Goldberg, neither of them did anything that should "disrespect" you or the business. Oh, that's right, they're not 5'8 and you didn't get to trade their tapes on the Internet.

It's funny, some of you are even worse than the majority. Case in point: the match is over, you didn't enjoy it, fine. No more Big Show-Batista. But then one of your own, Sabu, a man that you had been calling for, shows up and beats the hell out of one of the people you were just shitting on. And what do you do? You fucking throw shit in the ring! I realize that it wasn't as bad as the Philly crowd (which in context was at least somewhat understandable) but why the fuck were you throwing things when you were actually watching someone that you wanted to be watching? For those of you in attendance at the Hammerstein Ballroom tonight I hope that your tickets were insanely expensive, I hope that you feel ripped off, and I hope to God that WWE has the good sense not to run a show in front of you immature ingrates again. Fuck off you self-centered sheep and get over yourselves."

Twenty-five pages later and the debate rages on. But don't think that it only covers ECW. This discussion has everything, from talk of 80's rock music, SAT scores, the argument for and against driving while high, and the value of Canadians. Have a look and drop your opinions.

As much of a WWE fanboy as I am, I was still marking out for CM Punk's debut. A straightedge superstar is great in and of itself, but one with talent is even better. I hope that WWE has high hopes for him as he seemed quite over with the ECW crowd. It may not mean anything, but the music that Punk came out to on Tuesday was the same music they tried to give to Randy Orton before WrestleMania, also found on the Wreckless Intent CD. I would imagine that is a good sign for things to come.

Ring of Honor had their big "Fight of the Century" show on Saturday night and by all accounts it sounded really good. I still think its insane that Delirious didn't win the Pure Title on Friday, but that's neither here nor there.

TNA comes to Richmond for their biggest house show of the year on September 29. Tickets for "Capital Punishment" go on sale this Saturday at 10 am. VCU students and faculty get a $5 discount with their VCU IDs at the Siegel Center box office. Any wrestling fans in the Richmond area should come out and support the show to ensure that we get some more shows here. I'll be getting my tickets bright and early Saturday and I encourage you to do the same.

The Shimmy Likes It Raw!

What's on tap for tonight?

Triple H vs. Umaga: Umaga has already beaten John Cena and Shawn Michaels, Hill Triple H be next?

Which Diva Search contestant will be eliminated this week? As long as JT or Milena stay in the competition I'll be happy.

Randy Orton performs a cover of Randy Savage's "Be a Man." What? Well he should.

That wraps things up this week. Be sure to e-mail me your thoughts on my one year plan for Goldberg in TNA as well as your questions for the Great Positivity Debate. Until next week, don't die. Clark…out.