News to Start Your Weekend 9.01.06
Posted by Nick Marsico on 09.01.2006
It's on the short end this week... however I do almost say a bad thing about Jake Roberts and then instead say it to Bobcore Holly. Tune in for that, people!
I dunno... I had a lot of shit to say last week and none of that has been expanded upon yet. Maybe it will, maybe it won't.
Maybe it won't.
NEWS FOR MONDAY
Sting's DVD and a book by Banks... Since Vince owns the majority of the footage from Sting's career, TNA's DVD will be taking a similar approach as the producers of the Forever Hardcore DVD, meaning some pictures and lots of interviews without the visual aid of playing video of what they're talking about. Apparently this is one of if not the best DVD TNA has done, though. I'm sure I'll download it sometime. Also, Bill Banks is writing a book about getting into wrestling. Not something I'll read, but I'm sure it would be helpful to somebody.
RAW thoughts... I loved how JR was befuddled and so confused as to what Edge was alluding to when he used a table, ladder and chair in his beat down. OH MAH GAWD~! HE HIT HIM WITH A CHAIR! HE USED A LADDER! CENA JUST WENT THROUGH A TABLE BAH GAWD~! WHAT COULD HE POSSIBLY MEAN? EDGE IS A TLC MATCH VETERAN AND HAS NEVER LOST! AND HE USED ALL THREE OF THOSE WEAPONS! I BET THERE'S GOING TO BE A TORNADO TAG MATCH AT THE PPV!
Look, I'll admit that Jeff Hardy isn't unwatchable and he's wrestling better than he was in TNA, but he's still moving in slow motion. Yeah, the springboard corkscrew senton to the outside looked smooth, but there are a thousand guys wrestling today, some of whom are in the E, who can do it better and faster than Jeff can. I will say that the Swanton looked better than any he's done in a long time, though. What's with the finisher incest though? Randy Orton does the RKO which is a version of the Ace Crusher, and he lost to Jeff Hardy via the Twist of Fate which is a different version of that same move followed by the Swanton, a move that Mr. Kennedy, who appeared on RAW, has recently adopted and attempted on Monday night.
Melina didn't seem to know what was going on during the press conference. It was painfully long. Nitro did well enough. Generic heel stuff, but he didn't stutter or sound bad.
To close out RAW really quick... Lita's still a shitty wrestler, even if she has someone like Mickie who can (and a couple weeks ago did) carry her to a good match. That didn't happen this week, though. Also, the Hell in a Cell match? Yeah, this goofy feud really lends itself to having a match in the "most demonic structure" that the company uses. Jesus Christ it's ridiculous.
NOW TUESDAY NEWS
Big Show's Monday night... So he defended his ECW title in Poughkeepsie in the opening match and then was flown to RAW in AC. Okay, awesome. Uh, good work ethic, big man!
A look back at the near year-long war between Samoa Joe, AJ Styles and Christopher Daniels for the X Division Championship, including exclusive commentary from each and match highlights from their epic battles!
Impact: Three-Way Match - Chris Sabin vs. Petey Williams vs. Alex Shelley
Impact: Three-Way Match - Christopher Daniels vs. Matt Bentley vs. Austin Aries
Impact: Four-Way Match – Chris Sabin vs. Petey Williams vs. Austin Aries vs. Alex Shelley
Destination X: International X Showcase - Chris Sabin vs. Sonjay Dutt vs. Petey Williams vs. Puma
Impact: AJ Styles vs. Jay Lethal
Lockdown: Xscape Match - Chris Sabin vs. Petey Williams vs. Puma vs. Chase Stevens vs. Shark Boy vs. Elix Skipper
Impact: World X Cup Match - Team USA (Sonjay Dutt & Alex Shelley) vs. Team Japan (Goto & Tanaka)
Impact: Four Way Match - Senshi vs. Jay Lethal vs. Alex Shelley vs. Shark Boy
Slammiversary: Contender's Match - Sonjay Dutt vs. Alex Shelley vs. Senshi vs. Jay Lethal vs. Petey Williams vs. Shark Boy
Impact: X Championship Match - Samoa Joe vs. Senshi vs. Sonjay Dutt (Senshi's title win)
Hard Justice: Senshi vs. Petey Williams vs. Jay Lethal
Impact: Chris Sabin, Jay Lethal, Sonjay Dutt vs. The Paparazzi and Petey Williams
This looks less than awesome, really. The matches aren't bad or anything, but it's an underwhelming list. It comes out on Halloween.
Triple H admits to his backstage power... Meh, he's done it before, but this time it was in WWE Magazine. Yay. He also attacked the internet as he so often does. I think he attacks because he just doesn't get it. The younger guys in the locker rooms today are all about the internet and a lot of them "get" the perspective of the fans. H is just bothered because people don't consider him the almighty God and make assumptions about him that he certainly often has confirmed to be true.
Gymini to return soon; Vince angry... The Gymini are about set to return to SmackDown because Todd Shane (Jesse or Jake, who really cares) is no longer injured. Vince was upset that RAW didn't air on USA until well after midnight. I'm just reporting this. If I only reported stuff I cared about, there would be like one news item per column. I guess this would be a much quicker and easier read, though.
Jericho kicked off Celebrity Duets... He sang shitty and everybody was easily better. It was obvious. I think it was pretty harsh that they had to do the elimination dodgeball style, though. They announced everybody who WASN'T eliminated and left Jericho as the last guy waiting to be picked to play. Ouch.
ECW on Sci-Fi stuff... Flat, stale and boring. Cared less about this than I did RAW. Punk had a decent match with Richards, but the crowd's lack of participation murdered it. I wish Punk would have hit him with the Polish Hammer, though. Inside jokes RULE~!
IT IS WEDNESDAY NOW
Drug testing and Khali and Carlito and some unnecessary silly Vince news... Khali needs double knee surgery and they're thinking of bringing him back as a face. I wish they were thinking of not bringing him back. Carlito is frustrated about what he's doing on RAW, Vince wore a shirt at SummerSlam because he is insecure. That's WAY newsworthy. Go to the link for the rest.
Jake Roberts proposes angle... He wants to do an angle where he helps a fan recover from drug addiction. Uh, sure, great story but what the shit does that have to do with wrestling, Jake? If I was really mean, I'd say just die already.
friday night smackdown...
- Matt Hardy versus Gregory Helms
- The Miz versus Tatanka
- Finlay versus Mr. Kennedy vs. Bobby Lashley (United States Championship)
- Vito versus William Regal
- London & Kendrick versus The Pitbulls
