News From Cook's Corner 11.23.06
Posted by Steve Cook on 11.23.2006
Go ahead, click the link. You know you want to do something other than watch the Lions try to play football.
Happy Thanksgiving anybody actually reading this! I have a feeling the 411 hit count isn't going to be what it usually is today since most of America is spending its day on the couch watching football, eating turkey and seeing relatives they usually don't see. We all end up wishing we had computer access about an hour into the proceedings when we remember what kinds of assholes we're related to...c'est la vie.
It's been a good week in the House of Cook. The Bengals are back to their winning ways, Louisville football is back in the BCS picture thanks to Rutgers losing to Cincinnati, and Louisville basketball is back in full swing. One of my fantasy basketball teams sits in first place, and even though I've been working a lot this week...that ain't all bad either. Life is good, and it certainly beats the alternative.
In case you were wondering after last week, I think I'm going to stick around here a little while longer. Thanks to all those who e-mailed, even though I haven't gotten the chance to reply yet, it does feel good to know that people appreciate you.
Enough of the sentimental crap though, let's get to da news!
WWE & PRIDE have "talks"
Last week, World Wrestling Entertainment & PRIDE Fighting Championships officials had a meeting at WWE headquarters in Connecticut. They discussed working together in the future, which could lead to a couple of things possibly happening...certain WWE or PRIDE performers could be promoted in both companies or WWE could acquire part ownership of PRIDE and get their programming aired on the USA Network. Certain ideas would be out of the question, like a joint show in the US, or PRIDE matches being fixed in the US.
The one thing WWE & PRIDE have in common is a common enemy, the Ultimate Fighting Championships. UFC dominates MMA coverage in the US to the point where PRIDE is considered a distant second place, and UFC's PPV buyrates have been kicking WWE's ass for almost the past year. It doesn't look to get any better for UFC's enemies, as their next show will feature Chuck Liddell vs. Tito Ortiz and should draw another monster buyrate based on that highly anticipated matchup alone.
The main problem I have with this is pretty simple...I like PRIDE. They put on good shows, their production values are very good and their group of fighters is as good as any group of fighters in the world. I have no faith that WWE would have anything in mind that would make the PRIDE product better. Unless you're one of those sick bastards that likes fixed MMA matches. For the love of all that is holy, keep shitty WWE ideas out of PRIDE.
Lita closes her eyes forever
Oh, how I hope somebody gets that musical reference! It's true, everybody's favorite Team Xtreme lady (Jeff was a close second) is hitting the ol' dusty trail. She will focus on her acting career *cough* and her musical career. Well, Ashley Massaro loves her band, so I'm sure she'll do pretty well.
Actually, Lita will be missed by a lot of fans out there. In honor of Lita's departure from pro wrestling, I will finally answer the question posed to me a few weeks ago by Matt Chewning...
"who do u think lita can wrestle better then?"
OK, here's a list of all the women currently on the WWE roster that Lita can wrestle better than:
Ashley
Candice
Kristal
Leyla
Lillian Garcia
Maria
Michelle McCool
Queen Sharmell
Torrie Wilson
That chick with Jimmy Wang Yang
That's a pretty good percentage. So, while Lita might botch moonsaults and almost break people's faces sometimes, she will still be missed by millions and millions of wrestling fans.
Boomer Sooner stays with WWE
It's official...Jim Ross has re-signed with WWE and will be doing commentary on Monday Night Raw for the forseeable future. This shouldn't really be a big surprise to anybody, as Ross loves his wrestling and I don't think that OU radio gig is opening up anytime too soon.
Spike TV happy with TNA prime time ratings
You know the old saying...as long as she's happy, you're happy. And Spike is cool with TNA's first performance in the new time slot, although TNA itself was hoping for a little bit more. What they need to realize is that Thursdays at 9 are kinda busy for people, what with CSI, Grey's Anatomy and other shows that people watch in order to seem "hip".
As for me, I missed the first 20 minutes of Impact because of the super-sized episode of The Office. I love me some TNA, but I gotta have my priorities. It's like how I miss ECW because of Boston Legal...some things are just too good to skip in favor of the televised pro wrestling. Does that make me less of a wrestling fan than people who won't miss these shows for anything? I don't think so. It just makes me a little bit more picky.
DSW takes the kayfabe a wee bit seriously
Deep South Wrestling...wrestlers caught breaking kayfabe in public areas like restaurants and bars will be fined $250. As a point of reference, a WWE developmental contract gets you $500 per week. Is Bill Watts behind this? I don't mind kayfabe at all, in fact I like it...but isn't this a little bit much?
Oh well, as long as these wrestlers follow Kenny Bolin's example and live their gimmick, they should be ok.
TNA moving PPVs outside Orlando?
TNA is reportedly considering holding several of their pay per view events outside the Impact Zone in 2007. The main goal behind this is to create more importance for these shows and make them different from their Impact tapings. Since they currently hold 99% of their events in the same building, it's tough to tell a difference from a TV show and a big PPV.
Really, anything that gets these guys outside Orlando more often is a good idea in my book. It's just too bad Traci still has that restraining order filed against me in case they run a show in Southwest Ohio/Northern Kentucky.
Jillian Hall wants to move to Raw
She's still with WWE? Who knew?
Dr. Death writes a book
Steve "Dr. Death" Williams has written a book called "How Dr. Death Became Dr. Life", which will be released this upcoming March. The title makes sense because Williams overcame cancer, but it's not really doing it for me. This does make me wonder though...if I wrote an auto-biography, what would I call it? Maybe I'll come up with something once I accomplish enough things in life to write one that people would buy.
Yay, more WWE Divas like Kelly Kelly!
Dave Meltzer reports that WWE is interested in hiring more bikini models like Kelly Kelly Kelly Kelly and Victoria Crawford (ok, I saw her once on OVW...I think). Johnny Ace will be looking through his swim wear catalogues and hiring anywhere from 10-15 of these chicks.
Far be it for me to complain about more attractive women appearing on my television every week, but isn't there a more effective way they could hire women than by looking at swim wear catalogues? Like, I dunno, watching some indy wrestling tapes or something? I mean, it's not like we pick out women that we go out with by looking at pictures...unless you get one of those mail-order brides or something.
Boy, wouldn't the world be a much easier place if it really was like that? I change my mind...shine on Johnny Ace, you crazy diamond.
Sabu squashed for bad behavior
If you didn't think Sabu got much offense in on Umaga Monday night, you'd be right. Sabu has been getting to shows late, and fell asleep backstage at a recent event. Since that sort of behavior is frowned upon by WWE, Sabu was punished in this manner. This reminds me of the time I fell asleep during Domingo's column...boy was he unhappy.
OK, scratch "time" and put "times".
Don't expect Harry Smith on TV anytime soon
The current plan is to have Smith only work dark matches for anywhere from 6 months to 1 year, so he can get his timing down and whatnot. This same strategy worked pretty well for guys like Kurt Angle & Brock Lesnar, so why not go with it?
The "What The Fuck?" News Item of the Week
Believe it or not, PWInsider actually posted this as "news"...
This past Monday's WWE RAW was Dusty Rhodes' in-ring Monday Night RAW debut.
Really? Next thing we know, they'll be telling us that the Pope is Catholic.
Plugs
Csonka covers what the rest of us have the good sense to avoid.
Ari gets to handle the ECW in Stuart's absence...why does it not surprise me that he turns the show off after Punk's 3 minute match is over?
JT says he's getting laid...by a woman. A gay man is getting play with the ladies and I'm not...what the hell is this world coming to?
Prag does have a point...being realistic can also equal being positive, if the topic in question is something that you can't possibly say anything bad about. Or if everybody else rags on something that you think isn't all that bad for no reason at all. The problem is that most people just aren't very realistic. I try to be realistic to a fault, which has actually caused me some problems in the past and forced me to miss out on things just because I didn't think I realistically had a shot at them. How many more times can I use the word "realistic" today? Point is, I got no real problem with him or JT (we just seem to differ on how much we think our opinions affect the masses), and someday we'll have a few beers at the IWC Retirement Home and make fun of Randle.
Sforcina chronicles the life and times of Yokozuna. I thought Yoko was great when he was champion for a year...dunno if he'd work too well in this day and age (especially since he's dead), but back then it was a neat concept. WCW had a similar thing going with Big Van Vader as champion around the same time, and you really can't imagine how disappointed I was when Yoko & Vader finally feuded in the WWF and the matches sucked ass. Ah, I was such a mark.
Speaking of things I liked that wouldn't go over well today, O'Dog writes about Survivor Series 1998. The Deadly Game tournament for the vacant WWF title was definitely one of the greatest things Vince Russo ever had a hand in writing. Now if he could do something like that with TNA's cast of characters, then we might really be talking about competition in pro wrestling.
The Road column talks about traditional Survivor Series matches. I like them, but really, this year kinda shows how thin the heel ranks are in WWE when you look at some of these teams.
We're keeping it short this week because it's criminal to keep you people away from your turkey any longer than absolutely necessary. mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.......turkey.
I'll be back next week with more news, tomfoolery and maybe even some shenanigans. Until then, keep your stick on the ice.
