The Sunday Small-For-All News Report: 12.17.06

Posted by Jeff Small on 12.17.2006

Turns Out Hogan’s “Survivor Series” Comment Isn’t the Stupidest Thing Said This Past Week!!!

I would make a reference to this report being short tonight, but every time I do, it never turns out that way. Let's hope for a real long one then (the ones that JT always dreams about).

Onto the news…

WWE NEWZ OF THE WEAK DOODZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This Must Be Too Good to be True

Last week, the WWE released Diva Amy Zidian. Instead of the normal aftermath, the IWC just basically asked "Who the fuck was Amy Zidian?" Now why that may be good enough for some of you, I have uncovered the real reason why Amy was released. And it's hilarious, baby!

According to Figure 4 Weekly, "The story is that she managed to piss off Layla, Krystal, Vickie Guerrero and Stephanie all within a three week period." But Small, what can a Diva do to possibly piss off those four women? Simple:

Layla

Rumor has it that she went up to Layla and stated "You might have won the Diva Search but I'm on TV." I know, I know, how catty.

Vickie Guerrero

Amy questioned Vickie on her WWE status by asking: "How did you get your job as a diva, when all the rest of us are in shape?"

Oh but it gets better:

Stephanie McMahon

…When Stephanie was trying to give her advice backstage in front of a number of people, Amy didn't know who Stephanie was.

Amy didn't know who Stephanie was…

Amy didn't know who Stephanie was…

I'm without words. But I do know someone who wants to comment on the situation:





…
…
…
DAMN!!!!


Turns Out Triple H Was Originally the Weakest Link

According to Figure 4 Weekly, "the original plan for Survivor Series and the match with the DX, Punk and Hardyz team was for Matt and Jeff to be the sole survivors. However, Hunter got it changed so DX would survive too, and at that point they decided to just let the whole team survive and CM Punk was spared as well."

I guess that RKO spot in the match would have been Punk's undoing if things went according to plan. While I was fine with the match itself, in a way I wish that the original plan was used as it probably would have prolonged the match time. Considering that match was my MOTN, any additional time would have been only a good thing.

The good news to come out of that piece is the fact that the Hardy Boyz are actually getting a strong push by WWE management. On Raw, Jeff is still your IC Champion and as long as he is not vying for the WWE Title (which he's not), he's a perfect upper mid-card wrestler. And on Smackdown, Matt Hardy has been on a *gasp* winning streak by coming out ahead of Gregory Helms in their "Feud of Eternity" and just recently defeated Joey Mercury. While Matt is not booked on tonight's Armaggedon card, there will be a good chance that he will be used either backstage or in an impromptu match.

As for Triple H using his political power to once again portray DX as unstoppable, I'm fine with it as long as it does not hurt the main event picture…

The Newest Wrestlemania Streak is…

Triple H losing in the main event!!!

According to PWInsider and the Wrestling Observer, "The WWE is leaning towards giving The Undertaker his first Royal Rumble win due to their not being any young candidates like previous years. On RAW, it was reported that John Cena will go into Wrestlemania as champion with his opponent either being Triple H or Randy Orton."

So will DX turn heel? (Probably not) Will John Cena turn heel? (Not a chance) Will Randy Orton finally main event Wrestlemania? (Yeah, right) Considering every year, there's rumors of Orton winning the Rumble and making it to a Championship match, it still hasn't technically happened (last year's three-way doesn't count). It's almost becoming a running joke to pencil Orton into a Wrestlemania Main Event.

As for Batista/Undertaker, I'm not even sure that that match will take place at Wrestlemania. Last year, the WWE wanted to use that match at No Way Out (Angle replaced the injured Batista). One year later, the WWE would rather blow that "dream match" on a card that really doesn't need it instead of trying to boost a single show buyrate. Of course, this is all moot point if Batista turns on John Cena tonight at Armaggedon. Which would of course make for a better Wrestlemania in my book.

Speaking of book… I mean bookers…

Paul Heyman's Original ECW December to Dismember Plans

According to the Wrestling Observer, "There are lots of different stories coming from WWE about what Heyman's original plans for the Chamber match were. However, everyone is saying that Show had agreed to tap out to CM Punk's Anaconda Vice to get Punk over strong even though he wasn't going to win the title. There are then differing reports of when this would have been done. Some are saying Heyman's plan was for Punk and Show to open the Chamber and have Show tap after 4:00, which would give a minute for Show to leave and get a 'Thank You Show' chant or whatever from his hometown crowd as well as getting Punk over. Although Show was more than happy with that idea, Vince turned it down flat. Another version is that Show would eliminate Van Dam before tapping to Punk. Punk would then have been pinned by Test, would in turn would have been pinned by Lashley for the finish. This was rejected by Vince as it was felt it would be more helpful to Lashley for him to pin both Test and Show."

Like most of Heyman's ideas, this one has promise but there are a couple of areas where I could agree with Vince for rejecting the idea. First off, I love the fact that the Big Show would have put over CM Punk huge. However, with him not winning the match and without any plans to make Punk the roster's #1 babyface, there's really no need for that to happen. With Lashley always booked to win the match, Punk's tapout would have stolen his thunder. Secondly, who the fuck would have wanted to see Test/Lashley as the final two competitors? Say what you will about the Big Show, but he's at least ECW's #1 heel and on quite the winning streak. Test is worth nothing in the fan's eyes and I think this ending would have been shitted on even more than the original ending. Imagine if right after Punk's monumental tapout, he gets pinned via a boot to the head!!! Take that paying customers!!!

As for Sabu…

The reason Sabu was not in the Chamber match was not because he's about to fired (although he's still in the doghouse) but because they believed that of the four babyfaces in the match (Sabu, Punk, Van Dam, Lashley) Lashley would be the least popular, which isn't ideal when he's going to be winning the belt at the end. Sabu being taken out was confirmed a couple of days before the PPV, but replacing him with Holly wasn't decided on until the day of the show.

All these measures just had to be done in order to protect Lashley. Here's what I never understand about the WWE: why must they always go about things the hard way. No measures would have been needed to be done if RVD or Punk or even Sabu won the match. But they went with the #4 face and will now spend the next four months building him up as a Superman in time for Wrestlemania. While I give Vince (and his ass) much credit for always trying to do things the hard way, the dude's way too fucking stubborn. And in the end, his stubbornness will lead to the downfall of the company (which is still really far away).

If We Thought Amy's Comments Were Bad…

Just watch…

Hulk Hogan's Take on Survivor Series 1997

And for those of you who need a transcription (in case the video was removed), here's what Hogan said on an Australian radio show when asked if a wrestler ever refused to win a match:

Well, Bret Hart was supposed to lose to Shawn Michaels at, I think, um, Wrestlemania whatever the hell it was, 16 or 17 I don't know. All the fans were yelling "Bret screwd Bret". Bret told Vince McMahon I'm not losing to Shawn Michaels in Canada, and they went out there, and Shawn Michaels pulled a fast one on Bret Hart and held him down and pinned him. Bret couldn't do anything about it and the so called 'Excellence of Execution' that was supposed to be the greatest wrestler of all, little teeny Shawn Michaels held him down and embarrassed him. Bret Hart was being a horse's ass and wouldn't lose the match but Shawn pinned him anyway...

I think even Ron Simmons is speechless!!!

TNA NEWZ OF THE WEAK DOODETTES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Newest WWE Refugee?

According to the Wrestling Observer, " Rob Van Dam is interested in coming in when his WWE contract runs out in a few months. He feels he'll never get a chance in WWE following the drug bust, refusing to go to Iraq and Heyman losing his influence. "

Rob's probably right about this one. However, let's see how much money TNA is willing to shell out as it's gonna be costly. And considering TNA has still not turned a profit, I don't know how many more big named contracts, the company can take on.

That's not to say I wouldn't want to see Rob in TNA. A RVD/AJ Styles match is another one of those "Dream Matches" that would definitely increase TNA's buyrates (like Angle/Joe I did). And we get to hear another anti-WWE promo following in the tradition of D'lo Brown, Christian, and Kurt Angle. I won't even begin to count the VKM!!!


Shockingly, there's no Krazy Kurt Komment on the week so I guess it's time to predict a PPV.


AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT… WWE ARMAGGEDON PPV SIMULATION

Thankfully, this is the last PPV of 2006. It's a shame, however, that on paper it could be the best WWE PPV since September's Unforgiven. Unfortunately, loyal WWE fans have already plunked down $120 since November and I don't know how much income a loyal WWE fan has after 3 PPVs and Holiday shopping. I do know how much income I have which is why I will be watching the PPV at a local bar. There I can spend $15-20 on the show, food, and beer!!! Hooray for me!!!

Here's the card for those of you who are not in the know:

Main Event Tag Match For Bragging Rights
WWE Champ John Cena and World Champion Batista vs. King Booker and Finlay

Last Ride Match
The Undertaker vs. Mr. Kennedy

Inferno Match
Kane vs. MVP

US Championship
Chris Benoit © vs. Chavo Guerrero

WWE Tag Team Championship
Paul London and Brian Kendrick © vs. William Regal and Dave Taylor

Cruiserweight Championship
Gregory Helms © vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

WWE Match of the Year Candidate
The Boogeyman vs. The Miz

And now to do the simulation, I turn it over to my lackey, Daniel Wilcox!!!

The Smackdown vs. Raw 2007 Simulator returns as we close out PPV in 2006 with WWE Smackdown's Armageddon headlined by Batista and John Cena teaming up against King Booker and Finlay, plus a Last Ride Match between Undertaker and Mr Kennedy! Let's not waste any time and get straight to it!

WWE Smackdown vs. Raw 2007 presents Armageddon

Match #1 United States Championship Match: Chris Benoit © vs. Chavo Guerrero w/ Vicky Guerrero
Elbow tie up which Benoit gets the better of by forcing Guerrero to the mat. Benoit goes behind and takes Chavo down. Chavo fights out of a headlock and forces Benoit into a wrist lock, but Benoit counters with a snapmare and dropkicks Chavo in the back of the head. Chavo avoids an elbow drop and takes Benoit down with a short clothesline, and a second. Snap suplex by Guerrero and he floats over into a cover for 2. Chavo tosses Benoit into a turnbuckle and follows up launching him, shoulder first into the steel ringpost. Back suplex by Chavo and Benoit is feeling the pain. Chavo climbs to the top rope, but thinks better of it when Benoit struggles to his feet. Chavo misses a crossbody and Benoit rolls up Chavo for a long 2 count. Benoit knocks Chavo down with a few right hands, then applies an armbar. Chavo fights and luckily he is close to the ropes, forcing Benoit to break the hold. Chavo decides to take a breather and bails to the outside, but Benoit soon follows. Chavo rakes the eyes of Benoit and tosses him into the guard rail, before lifting him up and dumping Benoit, ribs first, onto it. He then tosses Benoit into the ringpost and proceeds to bounce his head off of it several times before rolling him back into the ring. Chavo climbs to the top and connects with a sweet missile dropkick. Chavo recovers and makes the cover but it only gets a 2 count. Chavo poses to loud boos. He charges at Benoit but the Wolverine counters into a tilt-a-whirl back breaker! Benoit now hits a series of elbows and covers for 2. He slams Guerrero before climbing to the top rope and nailing an elbow drop! Benoit covers but Chavo manages to get a shoulder up just before the 3 count. Chavo gets a low blow on Benoit and nails the Gory Bomb! One… Two… Thr-NO! Benoit just kicked out. Chavo tries to apply a submission move but Benoit is too close to the ropes, but that doesn't stop Guerrero holding on until the count of 4. Benoit takes advantage and manages to find an opening to apply the Sharpshooter! Chavo struggles but makes it to the ropes and Benoit breaks cleanly. Benoit pulls Chavo up and hits 3 consecutive German suplexes! Benoit up top, Swandive Headbutt! Benoit is hurt too but covers for a very long 2 count! Chavo fights back with shots to the sternum of Benoit and tosses him into a corner. Chavo charges into an elbow of Benoit who looks for the Crippler Crossface! Chavo, however, has it scouted and he rolls through before planting the US champ with a sick tornado DDT! Guerrero goes to the top rope and connects with a picture-perfect Frog Splash! That gets the win, and the championship @ 14:50!

Winner: And NEW US Champion, Chavo Guerrero!

Match Analysis: As far as simulated matches go, you will rarely find a better one than this. This had tones of drama and I really was never sure who was going to come out on top as both men took a lot of punishment. This had a lot of false finishes which made it even more fun to watch. ***¾

SvR Prediction: Chavo Guerrero
DCW Prediction: Chavo Guerrero

Match #2 Cruiserweight Championship Match: Gregory Helms © vs.
Jimmy Wang Yang
Helms is the longest reigning champion currently in WWE, if you didn't already know. Helms wastes no time beating Yang with a knee to the gut and a scoop slam. Helms walks all over the challenger, quite literally, as he stomps all over his face. Helms gets all aggressive and rubs his forearm viciously into the face of Yang. Yang fights back by coming out of nowhere with a hurricanrana sending Helms flying. Huge heel kick by Yang! Yang whips Helms into a corner but Helms gets an elbow up into the mouth of a charging Yang. Helms comes out of the corner with a swinging neckbreaker. Helms covers but it only gets a 1 count. Yang battles back and takes Helms down with an inverted DDT. Yang then connects with a standing moonsault into a cover for a quick 2 count. Helms gets a thumb into the eye of Yang to regain control and drops him with a thrust kick. Helms covers for 2. Helms tosses Yang across the ring on his stomach and he falls out of the ring. Helms climbs to the top rope and flies, nailing Jimmy Wang Yang with a beautiful crossbody! Helms throws Yang back in but as he does so, Yang surprises Helms with a wheel barrow-bulldog! Yang makes the cover and gets a long 2 count from it. Helms recovers but Yang comes back, feigning another hurricanrana and hitting a Russian leg-sweep! Yang goes to the top rope and attempts his moonsault finisher, but Helms counters by getting his knee up! Helms charges but Yang counters into a quick powerslam straight into a pin for 2! Yang takes Helms into the corner and sets him up on the top rope. Yang climbs up there with him and nails a hurricanrana from the second rope! That's enough to get the 3 count and we have another new champion @ 6:53!

Winner: NEW Cruiserweight Champion, Jimmy Wang Yang!

Match Analysis: More fast paced action is always good but like most cruiser matches these days, it's too short to break ***. Give this match 10-12 minutes tonight and you are almost guaranteed a great match. This was just good. If I was being picky I would say the ending was slightly anti-climatic but that really would be harsh if I let it affect the rating in a big way. **¾

SvR Prediction: Jimmy Wang Yang
DCW Prediction: Helms retains and hopefully we get a Triple Threat with Noble added to the mix.

Match #3 WWE Tag Team Championship Match: Brian Kendrik and Paul London © w/ Ashley vs. William Regal and Dave Taylor
Kendrik and Regal start things off with Regal controlling the arm of Kendrik in the early going. Kendrik rolls out of an armbar and surprises Regal with a quick hurricanrana. Regal stops Kendrik dead with a knee to the gut and a slam. Regal drops a pair of high knees right across the bridge of the nose of Kendrik. Regal tags in Dave Taylor who brings the physicality and aggression. He whips Kendrik into the corner and follows it up with a stiff clothesline. Belly to belly suplex by Taylor! Kendrik fights back and kicks Taylor off of him before flying at him with a flying forearm! Kendrik kips up and tags in Paul London! London immediately goes to the top rope and connects with a high crossbody on Taylor. He stays on him for a cover but Regal runs in to break it up. Regal hits a running knee on London before the referee throws him out of the ring. Taylor goes to the second rope and connects with a fist drop. He tags Regal back in but London hip tosses him as he charges! Regal dropkicks London's knee and hits a sweet capture suplex! He locks in an abdominal stretch so Kendrik comes in to break it up, but Taylor also comes in. Regal tosses London to the floor and takes him out with a baseball slide. Kendrik plants Taylor with a Facebuster before diving over the top rope onto William Regal! Kendrik and London double-DDT Regal on the floor! London puts Regal in the Boston crab for a few seconds before rolling back in the ring. Regal only just gets back in at the count of 9. Taylor attacks London with a belly-to-back suplex before he leaves the ring. Regal viciously stomps London before tagging in Taylor legally. London drop-toeholds Taylor coming in and hits a nice dropkick before tagging Brian Kendrik. Kendrik charges but gets hip tossed by Taylor. Kendrik backdrops Taylor over the top rope! Regal comes in but Kendrik takes him down with a Lou Thez press and mounted punches. London climbs to the top rope and catches Regal with a moonsault! London tosses Regal to the floor as Taylor comes back in. They double suplex him and Kendrik hits a variation of Sliced Bread No. 2! He kicks out at 2 though and Kendrik can't believe it! Taylor lowblows Kendrik and tags Regal who comes in and connects with another running knee lift. Regal nails the Power of the Punch, Taylor blocks off London, and we have a third new champion @ 12:37!

Winner: NEW Tag Team Champions William Regal and Dave Taylor!

Match Analysis: Not as good as anyone would be hoping for, but that doesn't mean it was bad. With the fairly lame ending, this was more or less good enough for a 12 minute tag match. **¼

SvR Prediction: Regal and Taylor
DCW Prediction: Regal and Taylor

Match #4 The Miz w/ Krystal vs. The Boogeyman
This is the part of the PPV where everyone gets up and goes to the bathroom. Make no mistake about this will be bad. So bad in fact, that I don't even want to simulate it, but I will, just because I'm that sort of person. An idiot. Boogey works the arm of Miz early on, but Miz fights back with right and left hand strikes. Miz DDTs Boogeyman and follows it up with a leg drop. Miz misses an elbow from the top as Boogey takes down Miz with a press slam. He tosses Miz into a corner and charges at him, bringing his shoulder repeatedly into the gut of the Miz. Boogey takes him to the top rope and hits a superplex! Both men are down but it's Boogey who recovers first. He hits a big splash on Miz for 2. Miz attempts a sunset flip but it only gets 2. Boogey surprises Miz with a double-handed choke bomb, and mercifully this is over @ 5:11!

Winner: Boogeyman

Match Analysis: I hate the Boogeyman, but at least in a game he has enough moves to put on a half-good wrestling match. There's nothing really to see here, so we should just move on. *

SvR Prediction: Boogeyman
DCW Prediction: Boogeyman

Match #5 No Disqualification Match: Montel Vontavious Porter vs. Kane
Obviously there is no Inferno Match on this game, and nothing remotely like it, so I've opted to just make it No DQ and hope they beat the living crap out of each other. Sound like a plan? Good. Kane boots MVP on his ass to start. Kane whips MVP off the ropes and into another big boot. Big leg drop by Kane. Kane dominates MVP with a two-handed chokebomb. MVP gets a lowblow in and plants Kane with a DDT. MVP stomps Kane before tossing him into the corner. MVP places the Big Red Machine on the top rope and follows him up. Superplex by MVP! Both men are down but after a while, Kane sits up. MVP tries a front facelock on Kane but he just back drops MVP off. Stiff clothesline by Kane, followed up by a slam. MVP battles back with a thumb to the eye of Kane before bailing. Kane follows him to the floor but MVP bounces Kane's head off the ringsteps several times. Kane tosses into the guard rail, and MVP beats him down with kicks all over Kane's body. MVP rolls Kane back in and climbs to the top rope. He comes off and connects with a double axe-handle for a 2 count. MVP puts a chinlock on Kane but he fights out of it. MVP charges into a hip toss by Kane followed by a big sidewalk slam. Kane hoists MVP into the air and drops him with a press slam. Kane climbs to the top rope, and connects with his flying clothesline! Powerbomb by Kane! One…Two…Thr-No! MVP kicked out just before the 3! Kane is pissed and MVP surprises him with a small package! Kane only just kicks out at 2! Crossbody by MVP. Porter climbs the top rope and tries an elbow drop, but Kane gets his knees up into the ribs of MVP. Kane tosses MVP into the corner and follows up with a clothesline. Chokeslam by Kane! One…Two…Three! That's all @ 8:33!

Winner: Kane

Match Analysis: Compared to the matches we have seen from these two in the past, this was fairly good. Inferno matches are usually full of drama but are often quite slow, so we could get something really good or really bad tonight. This was right in the middle at **

SvR Prediction: Kane
DCW Prediction: Kane

Match #6 Champions vs. Royalty Tag Team Match: King Booker w/ Sharmell and Finlay vs. World Champion Batista and WWE Champion John Cena
Cena and Booker start. Booker misses a thrust kick early and Cena hits the spin-out powerbomb. Booker kicks Cena off and this time connects with an axe kick. KB delivers a high, Ric Flair-esque knee drop. Cena fights back with right hands to the gut and a scrapbuster (Black Hole Slam) into a pin for 2 as Finlay charges in to break the cover. Batista takes out Finlay with a spear as KB nails a missile dropkick on the WWE Champion! Booker covers but only gets 2. KB tags in the fighting Irishman who comes in and stomps all over Cena. Cena tossed into the corner and Finlay charges with a big shoulder to the ribs of Cena. Finlay chokes him down with his boot in the corner. Cena surprises Finlay with quick right hands out of the corner and a big shoulder block knocking Finlay down. Cena connects with a belly-to-belly before tagging in the Animal Batista! Batista charges and takes Finlay down with another spear before delivering some hard right hands to the Irishman. Batista nails a high-angled backbreaker on Finlay and covers but KB is in. Cena takes out KB with the throwback. Cena and Batista double-team Finlay. Cena tosses KB then leaves the ring himself. Finlay regains advantage by crotching the Animal on the top rope. Finlay tags in KB who attacks with a scoop slam before going to the top rope. Houston Hangover connects! SPINAROONI! Booker's on fire now! But Batista scoops KB up and powerslams him to the mat. Batista with repeated knees to the head of the King now. Tag to Cena. Slam by Cena to KB, 5 Knuckle Shuffle! "You Can't See Me!" It connects and Cena makes the cover. One…Two…Thr-NO! Finlay is in with boots to the head of Cena. Celtic Cross connects! Batista delivers a Spinebuster to Finlay! Booker misses the scissors kick on Cena, and Cena hoists Booker up for the FU, but he rolls out of it. Bookend connects! One…Two…Thr-No! He kicked out! Booker argues with the referee allowing Cena to sneak in with a schoolboy but it only gets the 2. Batista and Finlay are brawling on the outside, and Sharmell tries to get involved but Batista clotheslines her! Celtic Cross on the floor to Batista! KB tags Finlay. He tries to pick up Cena but he gets a small package. Booker can't get in quick enough and Cena gets the 3 @ 10:00!

Winners: Cena and Batista

Match Analysis: Fine little tag match here. All four men looked good and there was tons of drama. It ended a little prematurely and I wanted Booker and Finlay to go over but those are just little points. Hopefully Batista turns heel tonight leading to Cena vs. Batista at Mania. Umaga, K-Fed and Batista all fighting Cena at one time? I'm sure there is a good joke to be made about Cena's next few opponents but I can't think of it right now. ***

SvR Prediction: Cena and Batista
DCW Prediction: Booker and Finlay

Match #7 Buried Alive Match: The Undertaker vs. Mr Kennedy
Buried Alive is like Last Ride right? Same sort of idea. All of Undertaker's specialty matches are the same really: put your opponents in hole in the ground/casket/hearse etc. Kennedy attacks with a dropkick first and goes straight to choking Taker on the mat. Kennedy throws Taker to the floor and follows him out. He launches Taker into the steel steps and then delivers a beautiful standing dropkick. Taker fights back with rights and a big boot. Taker whips Kennedy into the ringpost and bounces his head off of it several times before rolling him back into the ring. The Deadman hoists Kennedy onto his shoulder and drops him with Snake Eyes. Taker charges but Kennedy catches him with a powerslam. Undertaker pulls Kennedy down and chokes him. Taker tosses Kennedy into a corner and goes old school! Chokeslam to Kennedy! Leg drop by Taker. Kennedy counters with a jawbreaker and a German suplex. Kennedy nails a delayed vertical suplex and goes outside and finds a steel chair. He brings it in but Taker pulls it away from him and damn near kills him with the chair! Taker scoops Kennedy up for a Tombstone but Kennedy slips out the back and hits a back suplex. Kennedy goes to the top rope and connects with the Kenton Bomb! Kennedy has the chair now and he hits Taker in the back twice. He throws Taker to the floor and strips the announce table. Kennedy tosses Taker on it and climbs up himself, but Taker counters and DDTs Kennedy through the table! Both men are down but Taker sits up. Taker then tosses Kennedy into the guard rail and beats him down with big right hands. Kennedy tries to get away but Taker boots him down. Taker walks toward the grave and picks up the spade. Kennedy is here and he attacks Taker with knees to the gut. Kennedy gets cocky and starts slapping Taker's head. Spade shot by Kennedy! Taker is busted open! More right hands by Kennedy to the open wound of Taker. Taker fights back and tosses Kennedy into the casket. Kennedy gets his hands up to stop the lid closing. Kennedy crawls out and DDTs Taker! Taker fights back and boots Kennedy who falls back down to the entrance way. Tombstone on the concrete entrance way by Undertaker! Kennedy is bleeding now, too! Taker brings Kennedy back up to the casket but Kennedy blocks Taker throwing him in with a lowblow. Kennedy returns to ringside to find a chair but Taker follows him back down. Taker tosses Kennedy back in the ring. Taker calls for the Last Ride! He has Kennedy up but Kennedy strikes Taker and falls on him. Taker whipped into the corner. Kennedy puts him up on the top rope, and then climbs to the second turnbuckle. GREEN BAY PLUNGE connects! Taker is out cold. Kennedy tosses Taker to the floor and beats him down to the grave. He gets him in the casket but can't close the lid. Taker fights back with rights and lefts, but Kennedy takes him out with the spade. Taker lowblows Kennedy this time, and connects with a second Tombstone! He rolls Kennedy into the casket, closes the lid and this match is over @ 16:22 as the dirt flows over the casket!

Winner: The Undertaker

Match Analysis: This was a wild brawl with lots of cool spots and brutality. I'm glad that they both got busted open as it made the match feel more epic and important. Sometimes Buried Alive matches can go too long on this game but this was just the right length. ***½

SvR Prediction: Undertaker
DCW Prediction: Kennedy

Unfortunately, I cannot deliver on the promise I made last time about including the retro Armageddon Hell In A Cell match due to time restrictions. However, I have been offered a spot as a columnist on 411 and my debut column will be up this Tuesday afternoon and I may just include that HIAC in that column.

I'll be back in a few weeks with New Year's Revolution. Enjoy Armageddon tonight, and hopefully I will see you Tuesday!


First off, congratulations Daniel on receiving a 411 Column!!! Who knew that my lackey would already go on to bigger and better things? But fear not kids, Daniel will be continuing his run as my Simulation expert!!!


COMING ATTRACTIONS

Another news report, another dollar. Sometimes it pays to be my lackey (PUN INTENDED!!!).

Anyway, tune in next week as we will wrap up the year in the last Small-For-All of 2006. It shall be a damn good time as not only will I explain (in great detail) my favorite moments in wrestling, but also in music and movies too!!!

Until then, enjoy Armaggedon!!!

Randle's in tomorrow.

For the Sunday Small-For-All News Report, I'm Jeff Small… and you're not!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!