Schmozzes and Screwjobs 12.19.06: The South Philly Screwjob
Posted by Daniel Wilcox on 12.19.2006
For you, Christmas comes early as we have another debut column! This one is all about "screwjobs," and yet there is no mention of Lita anywhere. So what is in this thing?
Intro & Explanation
Welcome to yet another wrestling column on 411! I'm Dan Wilcox, a wrestling fan of just 7 years (a relatively short time compared to most on this site). Some of you may know my name from Jeff Small's Sunday News Report. I'm the guy who has been writing the Smackdown vs. Raw PPV Simulations. That has to be one of the biggest career jump in history – part time lackey of a Heat recapper, to full time columnist, and part time lackey of a Heat recapper.
I think it is easier to be a wrestling fan where I live here in the UK, because I don't have to pay for the majority of the wrestling I watch. I tend to think US wrestling fans are looking to critique wrestling, specifically PPVs because they have to pay $40 for each one, and there are 30 odd PPVs a year and for those that aren't good at math, that's $1200 a year spent on watching wrestling, so many people now think there is too much wrestling these days - 4 (soon to be 5) televised wrestling shows a week, plus PPVs and the occasional special. In the UK, you have Raw on Monday, ECW on Thursday, Smackdown on Friday, and Impact on Saturday. All TNA PPVs are on free TV over here on The Wrestling Channel, and half of WWE PPVs are on free TV, too. The other half costs a mere £15, which is roughly $25! We also have Heat on free TV, as well as "WWE Specials", either from their Fanatic Series, or hour long highlights from the latest DVD releases on free TV! And not only does the UK get the usual WWE and TNA stuff, The Wrestling Channel provides old and new Ring Of Honor, Japanese Federations I've never even heard of, British Indy promotions, and old British wrestling from the 70s and 80s featuring the likes of Giant Haystacks and Big Daddy! So there's definitely a lot more wrestling on TV in the UK, but it's all free, so it's much easier to find less things to complain about. Don't you wish you lived in the UK now?
That's just a quick intro about me in general, now onto the column itself!
One of the most hated endings in professional wrestling are undoubtedly schmozzes and screwjobs. For those that don't know, schmozzes are matches that end as a "no contest" or "non-finish" and they are usually designed to keep both (or all) participants strong or to stretch a feud out for longer. Schmozzes could also be double-DQs or double-countouts. And I think we all know about screwjobs. Particularly annoying is the number of times we see rehashes of old screwjobs, especially the infamous Montreal Screwjob, most recently redone at Saturday Night's Main Event this past March. In the last few years, we have also been plagued with countless schmozzes, most notably on WWE's Raw brand, but TNA has recently adorned the "no contest" idea. So in this column, I aim to revisit screwjobs from the past and analyse them, ultimately deciding on whether or not they were good for business and/or necessary, as well as looking at what long term impact they had on pro wrestling. Occasionally, I will analyse a schmozz if I am short on screwjobs to analyse, but I will keeping a running total of schmozzes seen in wrestling shows that are seen on TV.
Who? Paul Heyman screwed over Rob Van Dam, helping Big Show become the first man to have held the WWE, ECW, and WCW championships.
How? Towards the end of the match, Rob Van Dam nailed his Five Star Frog Splash on Show, but the referee had been bumped earlier in the match. Paul Heyman, ECW representative and Van Dam's ally at the time, ran to the ring and started to count Show out, similar to the way RVD won the WWE title from John Cena the previous month. But Heyman stopped counting at 2. Van Dam, confused, gets Chokeslammed by Show and Heyman makes the count, making Big Show the new ECW Champion.
Why? Paul Heyman addressing the fans at the next week's show: "Please don't blame me for Rob Van Dam's downfall, be honest and blame yourself. You are the reason RVD is no longer ECW Champion, and furthermore, you are the reason I had to suspend him for 30 days. And I did it for RVD's own well being…I tried to reason with RVD and slow him down. You people were driving RVD into an early retirement, forcing him to burn himself out. Your chants made him sacrifice his own body; your chants drove him to the ECW Championship…and drove me to put an end to it all. I promise you that I will be your messiah. I promise you that I will continue to make decisions that benefit no man, woman or child, even my own children," he spewed. "I will make decisions for the benefit of only ECW. Because as your messiah, I promise you I will lead ECW to the promise land! Forever stamped on the soul of Paul Heyman are the letters E…C…W!"
Analysis
Everyone reading this should know the real reason behind Van Dam losing both the ECW title to Big Show, and the WWE title to Edge the night before. For those who don't, a few days earlier, Van Dam and fellow ECW Extremist Sabu were stopped by police on Route 52 in Hanging Rock, Ohio for speeding. The police discovered Van Dam to be in posession of eighteen grams of marijauna five vicodin pills, while Sabu was in possession of drug paraphernalia and nine tablets of Testolactone. Both Van Dam and Sabu were released after posting bail, and were scheduled to appear in Ironton Municipal Court on July 6, 2006. On August 31, 2006, Van Dam and Sabu appeared in court. Van Dam pleaded guilty to possessing marijuana and was fined $140, while Sabu was fined $500.
At the time, Van Dam was not only ECW Champ, but WWE Champ. Under no circumstances did the WWE want their champion involved in this, and Van Dam lost both titles in the space of two nights. The suspension mentioned by Heyman above, was additional punishment handed out by WWE. So I think we can all agree RVD needed to be dethroned, but was this screwjob necessary?
ECW had only be back for a month, and Van Dam had been chosen to lead the company into it's new future. The WWE wanted Van Dam to remain one of the main characters in ECW upon his return, so they did not want a clean finish with RVD disappearing for a month afterwards. So it was probably the best choice to have Heyman side with Show; the two already had history (see Survivor Series 2002) and everything made sense. Van Dam returned and has been a constant threat to the title ever since, and he is still one of the most popular faces in ECW.
Long Term Effects
While Van Dam was gone, Sabu became the number one contender to the ECW Championship, but he failed to beat Big Show at Summerslam. Since then, Sabu has become less and less pleased with the company and the direction of ECW, particularly the way it is becoming less and less like the original ECW, and turning into WWE's "C-Show." Sabu's attitude has led to him getting de-pushed by WWE, even removed from the Extreme Elimination Chamber at December To Dismember.
Upon Van Dam's return, he had some very good Extreme Rules matches with the likes of Hardcore Holly and Test, but was the second man eliminated from the Elimination Chamber. Despite Van Dam being the most over guy on ECW, his title-contendership push was handed to Bobby Lashley who recently won the ECW title from Big Show. Both RVD and Sabu remain in limbo as ECW slowly transitions to WWE's third brand, and with Paul Heyman gone, it could be just a mtter of time until other ECW Originals such as RVD and Sabu are on the way out, too.
Big Show has remained ECW Champion until very recently, and has defeated major Superstars from across all the three brands. He has been the dominant heel that he was intended to be, with Paul Heyman, amongst others, at his side. However, with Show working a very busy schedule, including showing up on Raw and Smackdown frequently, his health as deteriorated rapidly, and Show is now taking an indefinite hiatus from the WWE, and rumours say he may not work anymore with WWE with the possible exception of a WrestleMania match with Hulk Hogan.
Agree? Disagree? Think there was a better away around taking the title off Rob Van Dam? Let me know!
Schmozz Count (From week commencing 11.12.06): 0
The debut week, and we don't get a single schmozz. Last nights Raw will count towards next weeks total, by the way, because I will usually have this column finished before Raw starts.
Finally, the 3 hour edition of Raw was last night and if you haven't already, you must find the report!
Surely, Not Another PPV
This is the section where I talk about a PPV if there was one in the past week. This past Sunday was Smackdown's Armageddon, the final PPV of the year and the card, like most WWE shows recently, seemed to have a hell of a lot of potential. But did Armageddon, Inferno and Last Ride matches and all, live up to that potential?
The Inferno match was a weird choice for the opener. The video before the match was an unexpected touch but it put over their mediocre feud very nicely, as well as the danger of the Inferno Match. The match itself was by no means a workrate classic, but it was a hell of a lot of fun to watch and there were some really cool spots to build to the drama. MVP on fire was a great visual and by this time of the PPV I'm already thinking I've got my £15 ($25) worth.
Making the Tag Championship Match a Ladder match was a nice surprise, but why not advertise it before the PPV. And then two more teams? Holy shit! MNM! The Mother F'N Hardyz?! That is insanely ridiculous, but I'm sure Larry Csonka will go through the wRongs of not advertising this stuff before the show in the Rs later this week, so I'm just going to talk about the match itself. This match was crazy! It was sloppy and a total clusterfuck and I loved every single second of it! Mercury took the sickest ladder shot I've ever seen and had to be taken to the hospital immediately while Paul London could've died taking a sick overhead throw from Regal onto a ladder. The good news on Mercury is that the early prognosis has him out of action for two months, giving the perfect set up for a Hardyz/MNM rematch at Mania. I cannot put over enoguh the guts of these guys in this match. Everyone tried new stuff and took sick bumbs while keeping the fans on the edge of their seats throughout the whole match. There were points in this match where I honestly feared for the lives of some of the wrestlers in this match – check out Kendrik botching Sliced Bread and you'll see what I mean. London and Kendrik winning puts them over HUGE and JBL said it best – "they are IT and they deserve those championships, but you can't take it away from anybody in this match!" Definetly a Match Of The Year Candidate in my opinion.
Now we bring the crap. Miz vs. Boogeyman. Why not put this before the Ladder match on after this to get the crowd back into it, because this match was always going to kill the crowd. Thankfully it only lasted 2 minutes (3 minutes longer than it should've done) and Boogeyman remained undefeated. Miz ate worms.
The United States Championship match between Benoit and Chavo would seem to signal the end of Chavo's push. He lost clean again, submitting to Benoit's secondary finisher. The match itself was probably not as good as their match at Survivor Series last month but it was still a fairly good match.
The Cruiserweight title match, I thought, was great, but the fans weren't into it as much as they should've been, but WWE only has themselves to blame for that. Helms winning cleanly was questionable booking if you ask me, but the match was good nonetheless.
The Last Ride match sucked, plain and simple. The bump from the Armageddon set was poorly done and looked very bad, and then Taker proceeded to bury poor Mr. Kennedy. As Taker loaded Kennedy into the back of the hearse, I was begging for anything to happen to stop Taker. A run in from MVP, or Monty Brown, or hell, even Michael Cole. But instead we got another burial of a young future Superstar at the hands of the Deadman.
Nnow I've got no problem with hot girls in lingerie, but did it have to take up that much time on a PPV? And if we have to have lingerie contests on PPV, do we need Big Dick Johnson? Well, I guess it proves WWE doesn't pay any attention to TNA and the VKM.
The main event tag match was good but it just felt like a normal Smackdown main event because nothing special happened at all.
Overall, this PPV is probably worth the watch for the tag team Ladder match and the spectacle of the Inferno and Last Ride matches. Most stuff was just fairly average for a WWE PPV these days.
False Finishes and Fan Cams
This is the section where I briefly talk about anything that particularly interested me in pro wrestling this week or just something I want to discuss about wrestling (false finishes) and any reader feedback I receive (fan cams). Obviously there will be no reader feedback this week, so the false finishes section will be longer than usual.
For the first ever Flase Finish, I simply want to talk about a few things that have been on my mind recently about the world of wrestling. I think it is important for a reader to be able to connect with a writer by knowing about their opinions and being able to discuss some of them. I already know many of you will not agree with some of the stuff I am about to say, but that's what wrestling is all about, right?
Firstly, I have found the Samoa Joe/Kurt Angle feud a total let down and very uninspiring. The build to the first match was so typical and to me rather boring and predictable. The first match was underwhelming and not as good as it should've been. Then the build to the second match was stupid, with them "watching each others backs" until Turning Point. What are they going to do, stand outside the bathroom while the other takes a pee? Who or what are they protecting each other from anyway? People are saying the Turning Point match was the Match Of TheYear, well, I say bullshit. Don't get me wrong it was a good match, but WAY below what these to men can do. To be honest, I got BORED by the last five minutes of the match, and then Angle cheating was beyond stupid, and he still didn't win. Why are they trying to turn Angle heel already? No doubt Angle plays a better heel than face, but he is one of the biggest names in pro wrestling today and he has just arrived at a small-time wrestling promotion – give those fans a chance to cheer the guy first!
Moving on. Despite what everyone has said this past year, I have found Raw to be the most entertaining show this year. I'm not quite sure how to defend myself on that one, it's just how I feel. ECW has been piss poor. Smackdown has been the best wrestling show, but I feel they are just going through the motions and have always had a little something missing to make it into the number 1 show. Impact has been good but largely forgettable and repetitive with certain feuds and angles dragging on for too long. The John Cena/Edge feud was reminiscent of Triple H/Rock in 2000 and they put on a few great match that ultimately led to Edge becoming a star. Add to that the eleectric reunion of DX, the return of Jeff Hardy, and the introduction of some great new characters like Cryme Tyme, Umaga and the breakout year of Johnny Nitro and you have a very good show. Like it or not, Raw is where everything important happens and has been nothing if not memorable.
Tag Team wrestling is making a comeback in 2007! TNA dominated tag wrestling in 2006 with AJ and Daniels, AMW, LAX and others putting on **** matches left, right and centre, but be prepared for that to be eclipsed by WWE in 2007. Let's take a look at what could be to come in the New Year.
The Hardy Boyz full time reunion. MNM full time reunion. Brian Kendrik and Paul London. The reunion of The World's Greatest Tag Team continues. William Regal and Dave Taylor beat up more pretty boys. Cryme Tyme will make more of an impact in the ring and become one of the most popular teams of all time. The Highlanders bring good wrestling and some comedy. Cade and Murdoch are your southern comforts. A possible return for the Bashams, now they are no longer needed as Paul Heyman's Security. That's 8 teams, all of which are capable of putting on good matches in different environments. Who knows, Edge and Randy Orton may become a mainstay in the tag division as a superheel team. Expect great things from Tag wrestling in WWE in 2007!
I miss Chris Jericho. It's been 14 months since Jericho left WWE and he is still sorely missed. Y2J was one of the most charismatic guys in the business and an excellent performer too. I'm longing for Jericho to return and feud with Finlay, Cena, Edge, Benoit, the list goes on. Bring back Y2J in 2007!
Jeff Hardy has got be thinking to himself: "Screw those assholes who said I wouldn't last two weeks!" When Hardy returned in August, nearly everyone said he wouldn't last more than a few weeks or a couple of months. Hardy returned and became one of the most popular faces on Raw and has put on great matches with the likes of Carlito, Johnny Nitro, Shelton Benjamin, Randy Orton, Edge and more. He has had two successful reigns with the Intercontinental title strap, and has helped (with Johnny Nitro) bring prestige back to that belt. Talking about Nitro, Jeff has turned him into a good mid-carder with potential to an undoubtable Superstar! And he hasn't been late to a show once! Good for you, Jeff Hardy.
WWE has been putting so much effort into it's PPVs recently, but I feel gets way too much heavy criticism. In the last 4 months, we have seen Hell In A Cell, Tables, Ladders and Chairs, Falls Count Anywhere, Champion of Champions Triple Threat, First Blood, Elimination Chamber, Four Team Ladder, Inferno and Last Ride matches. Not to mention the IC title on the line in a Steel Cage at New Year's Revolution. And not just PPV, let's look at what we've seen from the WWE on free TV over recent weeks; an 'I Quit' Match, a Ladder match, the Hardy Boyz reunion, Steel Cage match, Street Fights, Lashley slamming Big Show, Cena FUing K-Fed, and not one, but two, 3 hour editions of Raw! For all the stick WWE gets from the IWC, they have sure thrown a hell of a lot of goodness are way over the last few months. And with The Road To WrestleMania about to begin, I'm betting it won't stop here. So, thank you, WWE, for the goodness! Keep it coming!
Gail Kim is too hot for TNA. Bring her back to WWE because that Women's division is going to be in need of some serious help soon. TNA has no Women's division and so Kim is wasted there as a manager. Who else remembers the Summer of 2004 when Gail was busting out all of those amazing submission holds? She could be carrying the Women's division into the future now Trish and Lita have gone, which brings me to ask why she was released in the first place. I've done some research on the Internet but can't come up with anything concrete. Can anyone help me out?
I have no idea who is going to win the 2007 Royal Rumble. Some sources say Undertaker goes on to face Batista at Mania, but I'm hoping that doesn't happen, becuase I want to see a half decent Main Event, thank you. John Cena may lose to Umaga and then win the Rumble. Triple H and Shawn Michaels may be in with a shot. Maybe an ECW guy, Rob Van Dam or CM Punk? Nah. Perhaps a heel comes out on top for the first time in what seems like forever. Finlay? Orton? Edge? Booker? Maybe one last run for the Nature Boy? Oh no, wait, I got it. Your Royal Rumble 2007 winner - Kevin Federline.He then faces Cena at Mania. Britney Spears comes out to cheer on Cena, but turns on him, helping K-Fed win the WWE Championship and proving that the whole divorce thing was just a WWE angle all along. Well played, Vince! Hey, you know Cena giving the FU to Britney Spears will pop a rating or two.
Reader Feedback
Hey readers, send your feedback! I want to hear from you about the South Philly Screwjob, Armageddon, anything I've talked about in False Finishes, or anything else you want to talk about to do with wrestling. Also, I'm very interested to hear about how many PPVs you guys usually purchase each year and how much you would generally spend on other wrestling-related stuff.
Taking It Home
In next week's Boxing Day edition of Schmozzes And Screwjobs, I look back at a TNA Screwjob from 2006. Would you believe me if I said Jeff Jarrett isn't involved? No? Good, because he is. Plus, I talk about some of my favourite moments from wrestling 2006 as well as my Match and Wrestler of the year.
I've already got my Christmas present, tickets to see the Raw taping in London, UK in April. Hope you all have a good Christmas and I'll see you next week!
