The Top Ten 2.27.07: Big Men

Posted by Julian Williams on 02.27.2007

Is bigger really better? Well if you ask these guys, or Ron Jeremy, they'll most certainly say, "YES!"

Happy Tuesday people and welcome back to another edition of The Top Ten. This week we're going to look at The Top Ten Big Men and I debut a new feature in The Top Ten. I can smell your excitement already. The term "big men" is a loose term so I usually categorize a big man as somebody that is 6'8 or above and/or 300 plus pounds. So those are my standards for what a big man is, but I'm sure that you have your own spin on the term and that's perfectly fine. Let's get right into the column because I know you're about to wet your pants with anticipation. And I didn't bring an extra pair of underwear.

Reader Feedback

First up is Leon who has a serious beef with my managers list:

How could you have 'Jimmy Hart' at #4 instead of #1, Jimmy Hart has
managed more champions than any Manager
If my memory serves me correct. I agree with Bobby Heenan at #2. The
Heenan Family was one of the best of its time.

Im also dumbfounded on how you didnt have Mr Fuji at least in the top
5.
Your book he wasnt in the Top 10!
Fuji managed: former WWF champ Yokozuna / former tag team/IC/Europeon
Owen Hart / Demolition one of the greatest Tag Teams of the 80s
and that didnt get him in the top 10? I'll be suprised if was not the
only one unhappy with your article on greatest managers.

Don't get me wrong, I love Jimmy Hart and always thought that he was a great manager, but I believe that Sherri, Bobby Heenan and Freddie Blassie were just better and more entertaining managers. I always loved Sherri because she was just a bad ass broad that wouldn't back down from the men and there really wasn't any woman before her that would go toe to toe with the men like that. Bobby Heenan is an absolute classic so his position in the top 3 is mandatory. And Freddie Blassie was the prototype for most of the heel managers after him. Without Freddie Blassie, you wouldn't have had great heel managers like Bobby Heenan or Jimmy Hart. Period.

Next up is Geoff from The 3R's who wonders how I excluded a certain ECW alum:

Hey, Julian. It's geoff from The SD! R's.

Two words: No Heyman?

<>
Great job otherwise, although, of course, as is the case with these things, I personally would have ordered them somewhat differently (Captain Lou squeaks in at #10…?), but a solid composite of the best of the best. Well done!

Now I'm gonna go tell Paul E. on you…

I got a lot of feedback that wondered why Heyman was excluded from the list and honestly it's because I never really saw any of Heyman's work from WCW. I've heard that Heyman was great as the leader of The Dangerous Alliance and that it was really a precursor to the nWo angle. I'm trying to find some footage of Heyman during that time so if any of you guys know where I can find such footage, holla at a playa. Ok let's all just forget that I said, "Holla at a playa."

Rob thinks that my exclusion of a certain manager is absolutely INEXCUSIBLE!! Hell hath no fury like a wrestling fan scorn:

Once I realized that there was no Paul Ellering on your list, I tuned out. If you never watched NWA during the 80's, go watch the Road Warriors DVD and tell me that Precious Paul Ellering does not belong on the list. He wasn't just a manager on-screen (you really did get the impression that Hawk/Animal were ACTUALLY being MANAGED by Paul, ie contracts, stipulations, etc.), but he also REALLY DID 'manage' them off-screen. Never has there been more of a manager in this business, in the truest since of the word.

And one more thing: Skandar Akbar. He may not deserve to be on the list, but his management of the 'Sheepherders' was some classic stuff

Ok, Rob has a point. Paul Ellering was a very instrumental part in the success of The Road Warriors and seeing that they are widely considered the greatest tag team ever, his inclusion should have been required. That was a definite flub by me, you can all feel free to throw rocks at me and hiss in my general direction.

And finally, we have Dave who wonders where the love is at for the pimps:

No love for Slick in that lot? He was great!
I'd also be tempted to include Paul Heyman, he was brilliant with Lesnar and the Big Show.
Cheers

Ok, I must admit that Slick was pretty entertaining, but I could never understand a damn word that he said. And besides, he looked like he was somebody's alcoholic uncle who couldn't let go of the 70's. Well I shouldn't talk since I'll probably be somebody's alcoholic uncle who can't let go of the 90's. Acid wash jeans, Mountain Gear boots, and crappy boy band music are straight up JIGGY!

That's all for the feedback this week people. Thanks to all of you that sent in your feedback and be sure to keep sending those thoughts in. They are always highly appreciated. And if you haven't sent in any feedback yet, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR BITCH?!?!

Random Thoughts of a disturbed wrestling fan

So this is a new feature that will pop up every once in a while whenever there's a few things that are running through my head about wrestling or pretty much anything else that I want to share with you guys and see if you agree, disagree, or don't give a flying piss.

-Am I the only one that's kind of bothered by the creepy ass WM23 ads with the little kids in it? The kids playing Cena and Batista were ok and I even chuckled when seeing the little kid playing King Booker, but the rest of them are just beyond weird. The one playing Torrie Wilson looks like a glammed up whore-in-training, the one playing Shawn Michaels looks like a future visitor to an S&M sex shop, and the one playing The Undertaker looks like he locks himself in his room writing in his MySpace blog while cutting his wrists and listening to My Chemical Romance. Just very creepy stuff, nothing is scarier than weird little kids.

-So we're going to have Melina vs. Ashley at Wrestlemania? Anybody want to start placing bets in the "Worst Wrestlemania Match EVER" pool?

-Ohh wait a second, we might have Kane vs. The Great Khali at WM. Scratch my last statement for Melina/Ashley and apply it to this match.

-I'm glad that Martin Scorsese finally won an Oscar as the man had been behind the helm of some absolutely classic movies. If he didn't win this year after directing the excellent "The Departed" I think he would have popped a cap in the Academy's ass. Travis Bickle style bitch!

-Between "The Office", "How I met Your Mother" and "Boston Legal", I can't decide which is the funniest show on TV. But it's definitely one of those three.

-What's up with the lackage of Benoit on Smackdown lately? He gets added onto No Way Out at the last minute and is rumored to be facing MVP for the US Title at WM. Good lord, if he loses to MVP on the biggest show of the year, I cant fault him if he bolts to go to TNA once his contract is up.

-"Heroes" is easily the best show on TV right now. Period. Stuff it, you Battlestar Galactica fans.

-Vince saying he'd give The Donald a "Billionaire Bitch Slap" is perhaps the greatest thing I've ever heard in my life.

The Top Ten Big Men

Honorable Mention: Kane
The Big Red Machine may not be the greatest wrestler in the world, but he has one of the coolest and most durable characters the wrestling industry has ever seen. Kane's psychotic demeanor and menacing frame has made him a feared, and often popular, character in the WWE since his debut. Kane can also deliver the goods in the ring with the right opponent as proven in his bouts with the likes of Kurt Angle, Chris Benoit, Shawn Michaels, The Undertaker, and Chris Jericho. You can't fault Kane for some of the bad matches he's had, I don't even think that Ric Flair in his prime could pull out a decent match with Freakin' Deacon.

10) Sid
Whether he was called Justice, Sycho, or Vicious, the one common denominator about Sid was that he was undoubtedly cool. Anywhere Sid wrestled, he was immediately viewed as a contender to the title due to his off the charts intensity and seemingly unstoppable power. As a kid, I was a big mark for Sid because he seemed legitimately out of his mind and being the sick bastard that I am, I liked that about him. Also he had one of the coolest entrances in the history of the WWE because I loved how he gave a pound to the fans on his way to the ring and then would get to the ring, put one fist in the air, and have SID sprawled in pyro behind him. Awesome. Sid is a prime example that you don't have to be a technical marvel to connect with fans as smart and mark fans alike appreciated his work.

9) Kevin Nash
Ok, I'm probably going to catch some shit for this pick, but I don't give a damn. Big Sexy has always been one of the coolest personas EVER in the wrestling biz. And even though people like to crap on Nash's in ring ability, he did have some damn fine matches under the persona of Diesal in the WWE. His match against Shawn Michaels at Good Friends, Better Enemies is still one of my favorite matches to this day. Even when Nash isn't in the ring, he manages to entertain, as proven by the hilarious Paparazzi Production skits. Sure, they might be contributing to the slow death of a once great division, but at least it's going out with some humor.

8) The Big Show
Say what you will about Show, but for a man his size, he is one of the most agile and durable wrestlers you'll ever see. You aren't going to get any 5 star classic matches out of Show, but he has been involved in many entertaining matches with the likes of Brock Lesnar, Kurt Angle, Chris Benoit, John Cena, Sabu, Ric Flair, Raven, The Rock, HHH, Rhyno, Mick Foley, and others. Show plays his role perfectly as he seems like an unstoppable, unbeatable beast (unless you mention his time on Raw in 2002 where he was jobbing to everybody and their momma, but let's forget about that). I always felt that The Big Show was vastly underrated and I think that now that he's retired, people will look back on his work years from now and realize he wasn't so bad.

7) Mike Awesome
Awesome's inclusion on this list has nothing to do with his recent death because I have always felt that Mike Awesome was one of the best big men I'd ever seen. He was built like a heavyweight and could do all the power moves any heavyweight could do, but he could also fly like a cruiserweight and that is what made him special. Seeing Awesome come off the top rope with a splash or jumping over the top rope on his opponent was always a thing of beauty. He had some great matches in ECW, especially his legendary series with Masato Tanaka. I will always be pissed at WCW for turning him into "That 70's guy" which was a gimmick that pretty much killed off all his credibility. I was amazed that Vince couldn't find any use for him in the WWE after the Invasion angle because with a good manager, Awesome could have become at least an upper mid-carder based on his talent. We definitely lost a good one in Mike Awesome as I believe that he had the potential to be one of the best this business has ever seen, but we'll never know now.

6) Hulk Hogan
He's the Immortal One. The Icon. His impact on the wrestling industry is without question. Hogan definitely wasn't the one to rely on for mat classics, but his matches were definitely not boring. His charisma oozed throughout any arena he performed in and he could suck a crowd into a match like few others before or after him. His matches with Andre The Giant, Macho Man, The Ultimate Warrior, The Iron Sheik, and The Rock are legendary and are remembered fondly by many wrestling fans today. His 300 pound frame and 24-inch pythons made him an imposing figure, but when matched up against men like Andre The Giant, King Kong Bundy, or The Big Bossman, it made him seem like the underdog. Even when matched up against smaller opponents, Hogan was able to garner enough sympathy that fans would have no choice but to get behind him. Hogan may go down in time as the most popular wrestler who ever lived so his inclusion on this list was mandatory.

5) Andre The Giant
The Eight Wonder of The World dominated the squared circle for decades and was in fact so dominating that he was undefeated in his WWE career until his showdown against Hulk Hogan at Wrestlemania 3. Think about that for a moment. Nowadays, we're impressed if a wrestler goes a year or two remaining undefeated, but this man went over a decade without being defeated. In the later stages of his career, Andre was very broken down and thus practically immobile. If you look at matches early in his career, though, Andre was quite limber and could frequently put on entertaining matches. Andre was one of, if not THE, biggest draws in the 1970's and his popularity remains to this day as many people have fond memories of him.

4) Bam Bam Bigelow
The Beast From The East is another wrestler whose inclusion on this list isn't due to his recent passing, but rather because he was a highly talented big man. Bam Bam was one of the first big men to display athleticism as well as brute strength. He would be as soon to powerbomb you as he would to do a moonsault on top of you. When matched up with the right opponent, Bam Bam could put on a classic match as seen in his classic ECW bouts with RVD and Taz. Bam Bam also did the carry job of a lifetime when he led Lawrence Taylor, who had no prior in-ring experience, to an entertaining match in the main event of Wrestlemania 11. Bam Bam was a superb wrestler that was taken away far too early (like many wrestlers) but at least he got to showcase his incredible talent and main event Wrestlemania which only a hand full of wrestlers can brag about.

3) Samoa Joe
Ok so technically some people might not consider Joe a "big man", but when you look at the majority of his opponents in his career, except for Kobashi and Morishima, he's pretty much towered over them in size and weight. For a man the size of Joe, his athleticism and speed is simply amazing. It is almost a guarantee that when you watch a Samoa Joe match, you're going to see something great. Joe can perform power moves with ease, but can soar over the top rope seemingly with little effort. He's an enigma and being that it is still early in his career, he still has many more years of classic matches to come and I for one cannot wait to see them.

2) Vader
The Man they called Vader was one of the most dominating and fearsome forces in the world of professional wrestling during his career. His stiff style and menacing power made him the most feared wrestler in any promotion he worked for, both behind the scenes and in front of the camera. On top of that, Vader was also able to perform moonsaults and other top rope maneuvers which is absolutely amazing for a man that weighed over 400 pounds. Whenever the talk of big men comes up, I always hear Vader's name mentioned almost instantly and it is impossible to dispute because Vader put on some unforgettable matches during his career. You knew when you were watching a Vader match that you were going to see some stiff, hard hitting action and be highly entertained.

1) The Undertaker
The Undertaker has become one of the most popular superstars ever to lace up a pair of wrestling boots and when looking at his resume, it's not hard to see why. ‘Taker has been involved in some of the most memorable matches and moments any of us have ever seen and he's still making history to this day. Whether it be him defeating Hulk Hogan for his first WWE title, or the first Hell In A Cell match, or the unforgettable HIAC with Mankind, or him leaping over the top rope into a crowd of wrestlers at Ground Zero '97, or his first showdown with Kane, or his bloody HIAC match with Brock Lesnar, or his return at Judgment Day 2000, or his WM17 match with HHH, or his unexpected classic with Kurt Angle at No Way Out '06, or his recent showdown with Shawn Michaels at the Royal Rumble, The Undertaker has given us memories that we will never forget. ‘Taker takes a lot of criticism that he really doesn't deserve because I can't think of anybody his size who has provided so many classic matches. The man is a true legend and whether you like him or not, you can't help but respect all that The Deadman has done during his illustrious career.

Drive-By Pimpin'

Check out all these UPDATED great columns by my 411 brethren:

-Andy Clark's "Shimmy"
-Ari's "Column Of Honor"
-Sean, Alex and David's "Triple Threat"
-Bayani's "Truth B Told"
-Weyer's "Shining The Spotlight"
-Byers' "Cheap Wrestling for Cheap People"
-Larry and Geoff's "3R's"
-Fact Or Fiction
-O'Dog's " Goodness"
-Sat and Uncle Trunx's "High Road/Low Road"
-Phill Feltham's "Quick Talkdown"
-Sarnecky's "Piledriver Report"
-Slimmer's News Report
-Hidden Highlights
-Carapola's "That Was Then" and "Friendly Competition"
-The Fink's Payload
-Gamble's "Just 'Spose"
-Cook's "Ask 411"
-Meehan's "Meethinks"
-Sforcina's "Evolution Schematic"
-Prag's "In Defense Of?."
-Wrestlers of the Week
-Sullivan's "Crystal Ball"
-Randle's "Wrestling News Experience"
-Joe Boo's "Ringside Or Cheap Seats"
-Linkous' "WWE vs. TNA"
-Double M's Rasslin Report
-News To Start Your Weekend
-Dunn's Rawtopsy, Smackdown Breakdown, & ECW eXperience
-Cook's "News From Cook's Corner"
-Mike LaFave's "Getting Over"
-Your News, Larry's Views
-Mike Hamflett's "Storylines"
-Rodriquez's "Puerto Rico Report"
-Zac Calhoun's "The Ripple Effect"

The Sign-Off

We're done here people. Remember to pick up your pants at the door and return next week when we kick off Wrestlemania month by looking at The Top Ten Wrestlemania Performers. You know that Giant Gonzalez is gonna be on that list. YOU KNOW IT!!