411’s Countdown to WrestleMania 23: The WrestleMania I Roundtable Review
Posted by Larry Csonka on 03.11.2007
We start at the beginning, the very first WrestleMania. Today 411 presents part 1 of the 22 part series as we build to WrestleMania 23!
Introduction~!
To wrestling fans there is one time of year that is special. To us the fans it is the excitement of the big matches with the hint of extra importance. Knowing that the men that enter that ring are about to bust their asses and put their bodies on the line to entertain us for hours. We live vicariously through them, as they live childhood dreams and perform in front of millions via PPV. Whether it be for the World Title, for pride, 1 on 1, TLC or just delivering an emotional embrace in a true WrestleMania moment; this is what we wait for. It is the wrestling fan's World Series, Super Bowl, Daytona 500, Stanley Cup, Olympics, Masters and World Cup all rolled into one incredible night. It is the night where we sit back not to criticize and over analyze, but to be entertained and remember why we love this testosterone filled soap opera called professional wrestling. This is the showcase of the Immortals, the Grand Daddy of them all. The place where legends are born, dreams fulfilled, or crushed in a single evening…this is WrestleMania.
There is no mistaking that WrestleMania is one of a kind event, one that deserves a little something extra. And that is why today I bring to you part 1 of the 22 part build to WrestleMania 23. Each day we will bring you a special "Roundtable Review" of each and every WrestleMania until we reach April 1st, the day of WrestleMania 23. Each day the Roundtable Review will feature 4 staff members breaking down the event, match by match, and then giving you their closing thoughts. Now that you know what we are doing, let's meet today's analysts!
Our analysts today are…
First off is the man that will get a little something extra in his beer bucket as he volunteered for all of these reviews, the author of Friendly Competition and That Was Then, he is Stuart Carapola!
Next is my long time friend and author of Ask 411 and Traci Brooks #1 fan, he is Steve Cook!
This next man is a contributor all over this website. Former author of the Wrestling Guide, former Movie Zone Guru, and all around good guy, he is Scott Rutherford!
Finally the big dog of the Wrestling Zone and the man that is putting this 22 Part monster together, it's me Larry Csonka!
WrestleMania~!:
Tito Santana defeated The Executioner @ 4:47 via submission
Stuart Carapola: An interesting fact about the first couple of WrestleManias that some people might not know is that they had several straight up squash matches, similar to what you'd see on regular TV at the time. The opening match of the first WrestleMania was one such match, as former Intercontinental Champion Tito Santana faced the Executioner while he was being built back up for another run at Greg Valentine, whom he had lost the Intercontinental Title to a couple of months earlier. The Executioner, actually Playboy Buddy Rose under a mask, was no serious competition, and Tito put him away fairly quickly with Valentine's signature figure four. Rose would disappear from the WWF for several years before coming back in the early 90s to promote his special Blow Away Diet. Tito went on to regain the IC Title from Valentine shortly afterward.
Steve Cook: The WrestleMania tradition begins not with a bang, but a whimper. Unfortunately for Chico Santana, this would be his only victory at WrestleMania. He would lose at the next 7 WrestleManias before taking the hint. As bad as Santana's WM future was, at least he had one. This Executioner fellow only had one match in the WWF and was never seen again after submitting to Santana's figure-four leg lock. One can only assume that the Executioner's leg was too badly damaged for him to continue with his successful wrestling career.
Scott Rutherford: This was the first wrestling match I ever saw and as a result I became a life long Tito Santana mark. This isn't what you would call an overall exciting or even good match but for a vast majority of people this was our first look at the world of wrestling having been lured by Hulkamania and Mr. T to tune in. I still find it amusing that the identity of The Executioner is still something of a mystery (although most good judges say its Buddy Rose) but that's what gives this match its own little slice of history.
Larry Csonka: To me this was a very good way to kick off the event. Many call Tito Santana "WrestleMania's loveable loser" but with out Santana's efforts, WrestleMania wouldn't be the same I feel. He was an important part of the company, a strong hand that always delivered and his appearances always ensured the crowd would be into a match. That is why this worked so well as the opener. Loveable Tito vs. the masked villain (Buddy Rose.) Funny thing is that Rose agreed to do the job under the mask because he was promised a big push in the company after WM I, and the mask was to protect him, but he never got the run. Anyway this was a fine little opener that got the crowd excited and started the night off the right way as Tito scored not only WrestleMania's first win, but a submission victory, something that was rare for the event as it went on. Match rating: **
King Kong Bundy defeated S D Jones @ :23 (:09 Kayfabed) via pin
Stuart Carapola: King Kong Bundy defeated SD Jones in the longest nine seconds in history. What I mean by that is that the WWF claimed that Bundy had beaten Jones in nine seconds, but it was actually closer to thirty. The idea was to build Bundy up as a major heel, and it worked because he main evented WrestleMania 2 against Hogan. Even though the match time was kayfabed, the nine second angle stood as the record for shortest match for a surprisingly short time. It was one of those redneck wrestlers, I think Uncle Elmer, who broke the record just a few months later in something like six seconds. Jones, in the meantime, became one of the most famous jobbers in wrestling history as a result of this match.
Steve Cook: You know, it probably would have been impossible for Bundy to actually have a nine second match. Even if he ran across the ring, Avalanched his opponent in the corner and then pinned him right away, it would still have been longer than nine seconds. Especially when you take into account the five count. The only special delivery Jones made on this evening was his own carcass to the nearby hospital.
Scott Rutherford: Man, Bundy frightened the shit outta me as a kid and I reckon he still would today if I met him. Of course this match is all sorts of silly that is more renowned for the WWE pimping it as the shortest match ever at the time when if you count bell to bell it rocks around the minute mark. Little did I realize this was my first jobber match and if it was put on a WM card these days it would be dumped on roundly but you need to look at it as part of that time in wrestling and what it was meant to achieve, making King Kong Bundy look like a fucking monster. Goal achieved.
Larry Csonka: This will seem odd to many, but this was actually a huge right. Back in the early days of WrestleMania, they truly booked a year ahead. The WWF higher ups knew that they were eventually going to go into a big time feud with Hogan as champion vs. Bundy. With this event being the "huge" event that it was, they had to lay the seeds early. By having Bundy destroy loveable S D Jones in "under 10 seconds" they proved that Bundy was the new unstoppable big man, and could then go from there to build the title match for next year. That is why this "squash" was so important and had its place on the card. Match rating: ¼*
Ricky Steamboat defeated Matt Borne @ 4:37 via pin
Stuart Carapola: One of the big secrets about the WWF before about 1987 was that almost every wrestler they had, going all the way back to the earliest days, were big, plodding, fat lugs who couldn't wrestle for crap, mostly getting over because they were ethnic minorities and got over with some of the many ethnic groups in New York. See Morales, Pedro. Now, it follows that one of the main problems with this show is that it happened before 1987, and as a result most of the guys couldn't really wrestle, or at least chose or were asked not to. It just wasn't seen as the style that would get over in the WWF. Sound familiar at all? So when I see a match like this, the only thing that comes to mind is how thankful I am that Ricky Steamboat was around, because you could always be guaranteed that either he or Randy Savage would have the best match on the card. Since Savage wasn't there yet, Steamboat gets Match Of The Night almost automatically. His opponent, Matt Borne, would later go on to be the original incarnation of Doink The Clown and was also a great wrestler to boot, so even though this match was short, it still beat watching Big John Studd and Nikolai Volkoff oozing around the ring later in the night.
Steve Cook: Ricky was pretty early into his WWF tenure here, so this was just a match to help get him over. Borne would do nothing of note involving the WWF until his return as Doink the Clown in 1993. Not a whole lot to talk about here, no sir.
Scott Rutherford: While a Steamboat vs. Doink match at the start of the 90's would have been an interesting thing to watch, at this point Borne was just another talented under card guy and Steamboat was a big name NWA wrestler that had made the jump to the WWF and joined Roddy Piper and Greg Valentine as the only men to appear at the first ever Starrcade and WrestleMania. There you go trivia buffs. Like most the matches on this card it was short, energetic and designed to show the talent Vince had been buying. What sticks out most about this match was just how different Steamboat is to everyone else stylistically in the ring. Even as a no-nothing 8 year old you could tell this guy was good and that's all you needed to know to cheer him.
Larry Csonka: Our next match involves a true hall of fame wrestler in Steamboat facing off with a rather underrated performer (IMHO) in Matt Borne. They had a nice solid, 3rd match on the card match. Steamboat is just as smooth as always and Borne just goes along with everything and it is fine. There is nothing here that will blow you away, but it is a solid mid-card match for the event. Match rating: **
Brutus Beefcake and David Sammartino fought to a double DQ @ 11:44
Stuart Carapola: You know how I just said that Ricky Steamboat was basically a lock for Match Of The Night every night in 1985? Well, it was the complete opposite where these two guys were concerned. These two were in constant competition for Worst Match Of The Night honors back then, so when they got in there together, and then you throw in a pair of fossils in Bruno and Johnny V on top of that, it almost created a black hole of suckiness that almost annihilated Manhattan. In addition to being just a shitty match, it also had a shitty ending when the bout got thrown out after Bruno and Johnny V got in the ring and started brawling.
Steve Cook: If this match got booked on a WrestleMania today it would get crapped on worse than any match the Boogey Man could possibly have this year. David Sammartino was the 1985 version of David Flair, and Brutus Beefcake was Brutus Beefcake. As you can probably imagine, it sucked a dick. Bruno Sammartino was the most over person in the match, to the surprise of nobody.
Scott Rutherford: The one thing I clearly remember about this match was me wondering why the crowd was cheering so loudly for the old guy at ringside. When I later learned that they were cheering Bruno F'ing Sammartino things became much more clear. I also vaguely remember being thoroughly bored watching this match (who decided this was to get 10 minutes?) and when I watched it again recently just how terrible it really is.
Larry Csonka: I had memories of this match, horrible eye gouging memories. But then I went back to watch the match last year when I did my 3R's of WrestleMania series and I found it to be, well, fine. There is nothing overly offensive about the match, well, David Sammartino's severe lack of charisma is a bit insulting, but otherwise this is an ok match. Far from the worst we'll see as we go through every WrestleMania. Also I hate the DQ ending. Match rating: *½
The Junkyard Dog defeated Intercontinental Champion Greg "The Hammer" Valentine via count out @ 5:58
Stuart Carapola: Another in a series of long, plodding matches between a couple of molasses-paced slugs. At least Valentine hit really hard. Valentine pulled out the high spot of the evening when he pins JYD with his feet on the ropes, but Tito Santana, sportsman among sportsmen, comes out and tells the referee about it. Since it's written in the WWF rulebook that the referee is authorized to restart a match when faced with the damning evidence of a non-participating wrestler running out and crying chicanery, the referee did indeed restart the match and Valentine, shocked at such a horrible turn of events, was weakened to the point that Jimmy Hart was able to hold him back when he attempted to get back to the ring. Because he could not overcome the hulking strength of Jimmy Hart, JYD got a count out win, but Valentine got to hold on to the title long enough to drop it back to Santana.
Steve Cook: JYD was best in short matches at this point in his career...mostly because he was on cocaine most of the time. Valentine...well, short matches certainly weren't his forte because it took him 15 minutes to apply a wrestling hold. This was just to further the feud between Hammer & Chico, so nothing much to talk about here.
Scott Rutherford: This is the match they should have given ten minutes, subbed out JYD for Tito and put a cage around the ring. Well, I reckon Vince would have if he knew how good that match was to be in a few months time. With history and hindsight you could say they should have been given more time and possible have JYD go over since he was so over at the time but you can't change that now. Surprisingly decent little match that I believe if given time would have been quite the little show stealer since Valentine was more effective in longer matches.
Larry Csonka: This match was fine. Valentine was a great heel and such a good worker in the day, very underrated by most in my opinion. JYD was just over huge in the day and this match had the crowd and Valentine carried the work portion. I hated the CO finish, that and DQ's are a HUGE pet peeve of mine when it comes to WM. Solid stuff here though. Match rating: **
The Iron Sheik and Nikoli Volkoff defeated The US Express to become the NEW WWF Tag Team Champions via pin @ 5:00
Stuart Carapola: As tame as their act seems by today's standards, Sheik & Volkoff's shtick as the evil Russian and the evil Iranian made them two of the biggest heels in the business back in 1985. Standing across the ring from them were the WWF Tag Team Champions, the US Express - Mike Rotunda and Barry Windham. This was classic "Flag Waving American vs. Evil Foreigner" done to perfection. In this case, despite totally outclassing the evil foreigners, the champions lost after a shot from Fred Blassie's cane, and Sheik and Volkoff had cheated their way to the WWF Tag Team Title to the dismay of xenophobic Americans everywhere
Steve Cook: As Gorilla Monsoon said, history was made in Madison Square Garden with the result of this one. The dastardly Sheik used manager Fred Blassie's cane to do it, but a win is a win. Pretty short for a title change though, I guess they were trying to squeeze everything in before MSG had curfew at 11 or something.
Scott Rutherford: Give Vince credit, giving the tag titles to a Russian and Iranian at the high the cold war at an event with as much mainstream hype over a team called The US Express takes a huge set of balls. Some say this was a blow job run for the Sheik for him jobbing the heavyweight title so utterly to Hulk Hogan about a year prior to this but who cares. All I can think about is the wasted promo's we could have gotten from a coked up Sheik if he were allowed. Sometimes hindsight can make things much more interesting.
Larry Csonka: Title matches are an important part to WrestleMania I feel, and with the World Title not defended here, the IC and tag titles had to be. I feel this was a bit too short, but got the reaction they were looking for as the clean faces lost by nefarious means to the evil foreigners. The US Express would eventually regain the titles, but were not long for WWF and dropped them to the Dream Team and eventually showed up in the AWA. Solid stuff again. On a side note, Rotunda and Windham were two favorites of mine. Match rating: **
Andre the Giant won the $15,000 Body Slam challenge when he slammed Big John Studd @ 5:56
Stuart Carapola: This was the $15,000 Bodyslam Match, in which Andre would win $15,000 if he slammed Studd, but would be forced to retire if he couldn't. You pretty much knew Andre was going to win because, even though you were left to assume a slam would do it, it was never explicitly stated in the rules what Studd had to do to win the match. It's kind of hard to win a match if the rules don't support any circumstances under which you could win. We got the usual ***** classic spot fest that these two are known for before Andre got the big slam on Studd, a moment that was rendered meaningless shortly afterward when Hogan, Piper, and nearly everyone else started slamming Studd. Good thing Heenan was from Beverly Hills or he might have gone broke. Andre tossed a bit of the money out to the fans in attendance, but Heenan grabbed the money and ran.
Steve Cook: If you like slow, plodding big guy matches, this is your cup of tea. If not, you'll probably at least like Bobby Heenan's interview before the match and Andre throwing the money out into the crowd for a couple of seconds. I'm not sure why he didn't make a bigger issue of getting the money back, but I guess he got some of it back when he aligned himself with Heenan a couple of years later.
Scott Rutherford: The first wrestling show I attended was headlined by these two and because of that fact I watch this with the most heavily tinted rose colored glasses you can find. Even if you didn't know wrestling all you had to do was see Andre and you were impressed enough to watch and making such a simple stipulation for this match instantly made it more interesting because it didn't matter if the wrestling was any good, it was all about the slam. This felt like a "special" match on a special night and seems to be a much remembered match as a result.
Larry Csonka: There isn't much to this in all reality. Andre and Studd were feuding, so you take the two big dogs of the company, put them in the ring and add $15,000 and call it a slam match. This was one of those matches designed to send the crowd home happy. Andre gets the big slam and takes the cash and throws it to the fans, until that dastardly Heenan steals what is left of it back and runs like a bitch. Fine stuff, the slam gimmick worked for these guys due to size and the crowd was into the feud. Match rating: *
Wendi Richter defeated Leilani Kai to become the NEW WWF Women's Champion @ 6:13 via pin
Stuart Carapola: This was the only time I ever remember the Women's division in the WWF/WWE really meaning anything significant. Wendi had Cyndi Lauper in her corner as part of that Rock N Wrestling Connection thing they were doing at the time. Richter won the rather short match and regained the title, and then lost it again shortly afterward in a shoot to the Fabulous Moolah. See, Richter was holding out for more money on her contract and held up the Women's Title as a bargaining chip. So Vince just sent Moolah out there to shoot on Richter and legitimately beat her to regain the title. And you thought Bret Hart was the first one to get screwed by Vince. This also just goes to show what a tough old bag Moolah was, because she was easily into her 60s by this point, and she went out there and totally beat this in shape young chick in her 20s. Outside of short stints in the AWA and Puerto Rico, WrestleMania was Richter's last hurrah.
Steve Cook: Watching this match makes you realize how far women's wrestling has come since the days of Richter, Kai, Fabulous Moolah and others stinking up the ring on a fairly regular basis. It's ironic though...this match got a better reaction than 90% of the women's matches I've seen. Strange how things work like that. I blame Cyndi Lauper.
Scott Rutherford: Anyone who thinks women's wrestling can't draw needs to take a look at this match. In terms of quality it sucks a dick but in terms of sheer drama, storytelling and fan interest it ranks right up there in wrestling history and is criminally overlooked. I defy anyone to look at this card and find a bigger pop on this night than the one Richter got when she got the pinfall. The only thing that stopped her from really going mainstream was pissing off Vince and getting PWNED!!!!~ by the near 60 year old Fabulous Moolah in a shoot not long after.
Larry Csonka: History is a funny thing. WrestleMania was huge because of the Rock and Wrestling tie in. Most people discuss Piper, Albano, Hogan and all of that, but one thing that is often lost when people look back on it is the importance of THIS match due to the involvement of Miss Cindi Lauper. She was beyond huge at the time and her involvement is often downplayed when the event is discovered. The match is fine for a 1980's WWE Women's match, but when Wendi Richter wins the people are excited and her and Lauper do their little dance and all is right in the world. Great pay off here. Match rating: *
Hulk Hogan and Mr. T defeated Rowdy Piper and Paul Orndorff @ 13:37 via pin
Stuart Carapola: This is the only time that the main event of WrestleMania was a tag team match. They must have done a good job protecting Mr. T in this match because he didn't look half as bad as you would have expected from a non-wrestler. Piper has since expressed how much he hated having Mr. T around and took it as an insult that he was even there, but he was professional and made T look good, as T actually showed some proficiency with amateur style chain wrestling with Piper at the beginning of the match. Orndorff was put over as this powerhouse with the body of a Greek god, presumably positioning him as the main obstacle to Hogan in this match and not Piper. Hogan ended up pinning him to win the match and didn't even need the leg drop to do it. Piper got pissed and walked out, which led to Orndorff's face turn, alliance with Hogan, and eventual turn back to the heel side to begin his famous feud with Hogan a year and some later.
Steve Cook: This match had everything from Liberace dancing with Rockettes to Muhammad Ali serving as a special guest referee to a drunken Billy Martin doing the ring announcing. In a nutshell, this was the Rock & Wrestling Connection. You also had Jimmy Snuka & Bob Orton running around at ringside, and the old Cowboy's cast was what cost Piper & Orndorff the victory on that night. The fans were really into it, everybody looked like a million bucks, and there was a happy ending to send the fans home with a favorable impression of the WWF. All in all, it did what it was supposed to do.
Scott Rutherford: So hear it is. For all the talk and bluster about who created wrestling in the modern age there is the simple fact that if this match left a bad taste in peoples mouths it would be a battle to recapture the interest that had been created. Unlike what WM is today (a bunch of feuds culminating in a blow off) this was more like your typical big boxing extravaganzas, a huge main event with a bunch of under matches that don't really matter and if your main event didn't deliver then the night would be considered a failure. This match, while being only okay used the elements at its disposal perfectly creating a big event match that people remembered and were entertained by, thus validating the vision Vince had for the future of wrestling.
Larry Csonka: This goes a long with the whole "spectacle" thing we discussed earlier. You take Hogan, who was blowing up huge at the time. His rival Piper, with his pals Orndorff and Orton. Hogan has his friend Snuka in the corner but who does he get to fight with him? Co-Star of Rocky III Mr. FREAKIN T! This event and main event was really the beginnings of Vince McMahon going after the non-wrestling fan, or as we like to discuss the "casual fan." It worked to perfection and without doubt came off huge. The match itself is actually pretty good with a ton of heat, and really just what they had hoped for. Match rating: ***
The Conclusion:
Stuart Carapola: I look back at this show, its short running time of two hours, the squash matches, and the generally unsatisfying wrestling, and think to myself "If they put this on as a WrestleMania today, it would get torn apart." But at the time, with the celebrities and the promotion and being in Madison Square Garden, it really was a big deal. Unless you're interested for historical purposes, I wouldn't say you should go out of your way to find a copy.
Steve Cook: Honestly, this show isn't really worth writing home about. You've got a pretty hot main event, but other than that the card is largely forgettable. I'd still recommend checking it out though because it was the show that solidified the WWF as the most popular wrestling promotion in the United States. With the success of this show, Vince McMahon gained a lot of power in the wrestling industry and was able to drive everybody else out of business. Whether that's a good thing or not...you make the call.
Scott Rutherford: You really can't judge this WrestleMania by conventional standards. Sure most of the matches are of the jobber variety, the wrestling itself was pretty lame and watching it as a fan today it would only add up to a glorified house show but way back when it was an event like no other. This is ground zero for modern wrestling and even if every match was across the board awful it would still be a must see. Luckily enough happens to keep you interested on a purely wrestling level and history drips off the event like no ones business so it is very worthwhile. For me, it's the time I became a wrestling fan, an affliction I have dealt with my entire life and defended likewise and looking back on 23 years of markdom, I wouldn't change it for anything.
Larry Csonka: I think what is lost on most people is the fact of how big a chance Vince took by putting on WrestleMania. Vince begged, borrowed and probably stole to get MSG, all of the closed circuit places and the money he needed to make this happen. They were guaranteed the live gate, but the closed circuit locations could have flopped and if they would have Vince would have lost millions and the world of wrestling could have ended up very different if he had failed. As much as some of us complain about the current product, who knows what would have happened if the chance was never taken. Also it is one thing to sellout Madison Square Garden, because they had been doing that a lot. But to make this a success they had to make money on the closed circuit locations. Vince's vision was "taking wrestling from the smoky armories" and making it a "family event." They got the MTV deal going to get that audience, they had Cindy Lauper, Mr. T, "The Greatest of all time" Muhammad Ali, Billy Martin, Liberache as well as the Radio City Rockettes. It was imperative that they make this event "cool and must see" and that was accomplished. They pulled it all out and overall it was a success as we are heading to the 22nd version of the event. They also had all of the titles on the line, minus the World Title, which made the event feel special. Usually I would complain about the World Title not being defended, but with what they had planned, they get a pass here.
