Column of Honor: 05.26.07 Memorial Day Weekend of Honor
Posted by Ari Berenstein on 05.26.2007
Desert Island DVDs, Rave D-U-H, Dear Delirious and anything else I can say that starts with the letter “D”.
We're going to start this week with a bit of UFC talk.
UFC 71: Liddell vs. Jackson is tonight. I am pumped and ready to see these two guys punch each other's lights out. It should be a fast, action packed bout. Ultimately I have to go with Chuck Liddell to win, even in this year of upsets for UFC. Couture may have shocked the world, and Gabriel Gonzaga may have shocked the universe with their respective wins over Sylvia and CroCop, but I don't think that we'll see another upset of sorts in this one. Although I find Quentin "Rampage" Jackson extremely likable and entertaining as well as vaguely reminiscent of the Junk yard Dog what with that chain around his neck. All we need is for him to do the THUMP and Grab them cakes and we're all set. Jackson is a damned good interview and someone I'd hope for continued success, but Chuck is Chuck until someone actually does take him out.
I also am very glad to get to see Karo Parisyan fight on tonight's card. He's a favorite of mine since he has style and panache but he can also bring it to you with his judo and his strikes. I hope he takes out Josh Burkman on his way back into contention for the Welterweight title. There's a back log at the top with Matt Hughes, George St. Pierre and Josh Koscheck, but it'd like to see Karo get up there.
Brock Lesnar may or may not get to make his MMA debut next week due to developing situations and clearance problems with K-1 and the CSAC. First his opponent, Choi Hong Man was diagnosed with a medical condition. Then there is all this junk about paperwork, medicals and such not being properly filed for this show. Apparently FEG is cleared but K-1 is not. Showtime has a contract to put a show on TV, so at least some sort of show is going to take place. However, if Lesnar is not a part of it (or worse for MMA fans, Sakuraba vs. Gracie may be off), then boy or boy is there going to be hell to pay and a lot of angry fans. Pro wrestling fans and MMA fans have been waiting a while for the pay off of seeing if Lesnar is for real in this sport. If this breaks down again, my patience is completely done with and I'd care less if Lesnar (and to a lesser extent Angle) ever really do get inside an Octagon or ring
Back to our regular scheduled Column of Honor.
Desert Island DVD's
Back in the music zone, I used to write a column entitled Tracklisiting, where I would put together mix CDs and comps of the music I was into at any given time. It was a lot of fun, because I was in control over what songs would appear and in what order. 411 also had an "Essentials" column going where the staffers selected their top albums—a sort of desert island disc listing that showed you the styles and genres of music favored by the writers. This idea of an "all time" or "desert island" list has always appealed to me, hell I began my column writing here at 411 in earnest by referencing High Fidelity and Rob Gordon's Top 5 list.
That's why I'm bringing it back, transplanting the idea across from the music zone to the wrestling zone and specifically right here to my column about Ring of Honor.
ROH has run over 140 shows and with that there is the corresponding number of ROH DVD releases. It's getting up there in number, almost resembling the longevity of some comic book titles! To select a personal list of five DVDs from that list of 140 would mean that only about 3-4% of ROH's shows would make the cut. How do I choose from such a huge list of possibilities?
I'm not even saying these have to be the best shows of all time, but rather my favorites. If I'm stuck on a desert island, I'll need my favorite shows, matches and memorable moments to keep me company. Those shows would have to mean something special to me or at the least represent something worth keeping in order to watch them over and over again.
The problem (although that's a relative term) is that almost every ROH DVD has a good to great match worth watching, or some fun or dramatic promo to experience. ROH may have its share of average shows, but there is very rarely a bad show. At the least there are always one or two good things you can take away from an ROH DVD, and usually a lot more.
I'll tell you what wouldn't be on that list—ROH Uncensored! Blech! I'm thinking Gabe and Co. may want that one back. They may need to pay ME in order to get me to watch that DVD ever again.
After some contemplation and struggling to fit shows in on the list, here's the list I came up with:
The Column of Honor D.I.DVDs (in no particular order):
1. Death Before Dishonor: This is an "old school" ROH DVD that represents the finest of that period. I mean this show has it all: noteworthy moments, excellent matches, dramatic promos, a dramatic return, an emotional goodbye and of course a very funny moment of ROH infamy. This was Paul London's final ROH show and he and Samoa Joe put on a very good match, in fact one of Samoa Joe's first truly memorable matches of what would turn out to be a longstanding title reign. London's goodbye and farewell speech, where he kissed the ROH logo on the mat, remains an iconic moment that represents some of the finer moments of emotion and impact that ROH brings to the table. I can watch the rear naked choke sequence at the end of the match over and over and continue to be entertained by it.
Then you have third and last of The Briscoes vs. AJ Styles and The Amazing Red matches. Styles and Red were ROH Tag Team Champions at the time and were just doing a fantastic job of bringing action and quality to the tag circuit. While this match is not as spectacular as the first two of the encounters between the teams, this match in my mind is where The Briscoes truly started to become a seamless unit in ROH. Their speed in the ring and ability to use tag moves to cut off their opponent were upped tremendously, and everything seemed to click together. If you look at The Briscoes now vs. then by looking at this match, you can definitely see the roots of their current peak right in this match.
You can't forget about the awesome Raven-CM Punk feud and the Dog Collar match / post match encounter with the surprise return of Tommy Dreamer. The "beer" incident remains one of my personal favorite moments—using past ECW and WWE history (the Raven-Dreamer legacy) to make the current ROH that much more special. In addition, a huge reason why this show is on my list is because you get two of Punk's finest ROH promos here, one being the "This is Straightedge!" promo that put Punk's character over the top—that one is included in the recap build up to the dog collar match. The other comes in the set up to the match where Punk compares Raven to his father being an alcoholic. Oh, and then the post show promo where Punk is just PISSED OFF at Raven's actions is also worthy of repeat watching (Colt Cabana gets his licks in too).
Throw in the return of Low Ki in order to demolish some Special K punks, a very good hardcore match between Texas Wrestling Academy and Carnage Crew, Tom Carter (Reckless Youth) doing it up in technical wrestling fashion against Doug Williams and the infamous Jeff Hardy booing incident, and you have a can't pass up DVD. This show just screams out "VALUE!" It's definitely staying on my desert island list for a long time to come.
2. Glory By Honor V Night 2: I've praised this show during my Final Column feature as one of the top shows of 2006. The top half of the card still holds up eight months later, although the under card comes off weaker than it seemed at the time. Still, you can't argue with three great to awesome back to back matches in the form of the ROH tag title match, the GHC Heavyweight title match and the ROH World title match .I just recently re-watched the main event of Danielson vs. KENTA for the ROH World title, and damn is that match just great. It's just tremendous wrestling, step for step building up the match until the finish. I also would want this DVD on my list because of the Bruno Sammartino appearance and resulting confrontation between Samoa Joe and Takeshi Morishima. The bonus features are right on as well, as the video recap includes one of Danielson's great promos post shoulder injury detailing why he will continue to defend the title. Also for you Jimmy Jacobs fans out there you get the next best thing to an appearance on MTV in the "Victory of Love" music video where among other things, Jacobs sings in front of a tombstone bearing his last name.
3. Joe vs. Kobashi: I don't think I could go on and exist in the world, much less on a desert island, without access to one of the greatest matches of all time, much less ROH history. I and others have written ad nausea about the match itself and the atmosphere surrounding the match. The one thing I haven't talked about much is how I felt after the show was over. I felt like I had just seen the best thing ever, and that euphoric rush you get after knowing you have witnessed greatness (such as after a championship playoff game) carried with me for the rest of the night. How can you live without that feeling? It's quite addictive once you've felt it the first time.
I should also mention the under card, which ended up being very good overall and had at least three really fun bouts that would be easy repeat viewings in Claudio Castagnoli vs. Colt Cabana, the three way between Matt Sydal, Christopher Daniels and ("you f'n suck") Azriael, and James Gibson making one of his emotional last appearances to fight Jimmy Yang.
4. Final Battle 2006: Speaking of emotional moments, how could you get any better than this past December at the Grand Ballroom, celebrating for twenty plus minutes with Homicide as he won the ROH World title? Not only was this an incredibly strong card overall (and followed a similar structure to the GBHV N2 show), but the title win of NYC's hometown boy is a true and legitimate ROH feel good moment that I would want to relive over and over again. Not to mention the post show recap video in celebration of Homicide's five year journey makes the win feel that much more special.
5. Manhattan Mayhem: No surprise here as I talk this DVD up whenever I get the chance. Even two years later and with a completely separate roster, this represents one hell of a high point for ROH action. There is literally no bad match on this show. The crowd is up for all of the action and it has some of the most over feuds going on at this point (Punk vs. The Embassy, Aries vs. Shelley, etc.). I couldn't ever give this one up.
So maybe it's no coincidence that I was actually in attendance for four out of the five shows I've listed. Being there live for a great show just sears the experience into your memory and makes you want to relive the moments of the show over and over again. That's a part of the reason why I try to find bootlegs of the concerts I attend—I want the feeling of a Joe vs. Kobashi match or a Homicide title win and you the comfort of experiencing those emotional highs at my convenience.
Then again, if you were actually to be stuck on a desert island, you're going to need ALL the memorable and positive experiences you can get your hands on. Not everyone gets to get off the island, Gilligan.
What? You thought I'd make a Jack, Kate and Sawyer reference?
So this is where YOU come in, readers of THIS Column of Honor. I WANT YOU to send in YOUR top five Ring of Honor Desert Island DVD lists and I'll publish them right here at CoH. Send in a list or be as detailed as you want—I'd love to hear what shows are your Desert Island DVDs.
ROH Call
ROH Champions—As of 05/26/2007
ROH World Champion—Takeshi Morishima (champion since 02/17/07, 7 successful defenses)
Next Defense:: Jay Briscoe, 6/08/07 Roxbury Crossing, MA
V.1 defeated BJ Whitmer via pinfall / backdrop driver (2/23/07 Dayton, OH)
V. 2 defeated KENTA via pinfall / backdrop driver (3/04/07 Tokyo, Japan)
V.3 defeated Nigel McGuinness via pinfall / backdrop driver (4/14/07 Edison, NJ)
V.4 defeated Austin Aries via pinfall / backdrop driver (4/27/07 St. Paul, MN)
V.5 defeated SHINGO via pinfall / backdrop driver (4/28/07 Chicago Ridge, IL)
V.6 defeated KAZMA via pinfall / backdrop driver (05/06/07 Tokyo, Japan)
V.7 defeated BJ Whitmer via pinfall / backdrop driver (05/12/07 New York, NY)
ROH World Tag Team Champions— Jay and Mark Briscoe (champions since 03/30/07, 4 successful defenses)
Next Defense: The Kings of Wrestling (Claudio Castagnoli and Chris Hero), 6/09/07, Philadelphia, PA
V.1 Ultimate Endurance: defeated Pelle Primeau & Mitch Franklin, Mike Quackenbush & Jigsaw, Hallowicked & Gran Akuma (4/27/07 St. Paul, MN)
V.2 defeated Motor City Machine Guns (Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin) (4/28/07 Chicago, IL)
V.3 defeated BJ Whitmer and ROH World Champion Takeshi Morishima (5/11/07, Hartford, CT)
V.4 defeated Claudio Castagnoli and Matt Sydal (5/12/07, New York, NY)
ROH News
(via the ROHnewswire… and other sources when attributed
ROH featured on VH1's "Where Are They Now?: Reality Stars"
Ring Of Honor footage aired on VH1 last night and Larry Sweeney is outraged. ROH can be seen on VH1's "Where Are They Now?: Reality Stars" show. The footage airs Survivor villain Jonny Fairplay getting his head taken off by Nigel McGuinness. Fairplay was a guest of super agent Larry Sweeney and Chris Hero at the show where Nigel hit him with the devastating lariat. Sweeney and Hero both consider the footage a major embarrassment. There is an article on the main page of ROHwrestling.com detailing this situation. Hero and McGuinness will collide as part of a Four Corner Survival that includes Claudio Castagnoli and Mike Quackenbush on June 8th in Boston. Now two more matches have been signed. Keep an eye out for replays of "Where Are They Now?: Reality Stars" on VH1 to see ROH footage with McGuinness, Hero and Sweeney.
June 9th in Philadelphia will see Nigel McGuinness take on Larry Sweeney's mystery opponent. We have been told this is a big name and a man that will be "Nigel's toughest opponent." Sweeney has made it clear that he will make McGuinness sorry for ever putting his hands on Fairplay. It will all lead to ROH's next PPV taping, June 23rd in Chicago, when McGuinness will take on Hero one-on-one.
Jonny Fairplay is a huge fan of ROH and wanted to bring some extra attention to the company. In a statement he made on the ROH fan boards, he says "i just want to thank you guys for making the vh-1/roh experience super awesome! when vh-1 asked me if they could film me doing a wrestling appearance, my first thought was roh. i have been a fan of the promotion for years and i was happy to pass the exposure on to roh and their fans. roh has consistantly provided the BEST wrestling i have seen over the last few years. anyways, thank you gabe, cary, chris, larry, nigel (well not so much nigel, j/k), roh and all the supporters of roh. i felt today's vh1 special was great and something that i am really proud of."
The segment with Fairplay ran about six minutes and ROH was featured for a good three minutes of it. Ring of Honor was mentioned by name at least twice from what I remember, once by "Sweet and Sour" Larry Sweeney and once by Fairplay himself. The ROH footage starts with Fairplay behind the scenes at the show giving the who, what and where of the whole thing. Then we get highlights of the McGuinness vs. Hero match, focusing on Sweeney and Fairplay's antics outside the ring, such as running around in fear of Nigel and CHEATING TO WIN! Then we get the awesome LARIAT OF DEATH to Fairplay.
Overall this couldn't have come out any better for Ring of Honor. It's the biggest exposure the company has had yet on mainstream national television. ROH has done several spots for local news programs such as right here in New York for Channel 11 (now a CW affiliate), but this is by far a wider and larger net to catch prospective fans. I also have to say that as much as Fairplay "comes off" as a weasel; he actually seems to be pretty decent hearted. He was good enough to get ROH involved in this project and he didn't have to do that. While I personally abhor reality shows at this point in my life and would rather watch anything but that kind of programming, there is still the sizable audience out there who would be interested in watching these shows and especially the cottage factory of shows dedicated to covering that genre, several of which are on VH1 or E!
Put it this way, my sister, who had little to do after coming back for the summer after watching a year of vet school, was watching the "Where Are They Now?" special for the Celebrity Fit Club. If my sister, college educated and one smart cookie, is watching these shows just to watch and unwind, guaranteed there are others out there watching these shows. That means more eyes and ears exposed to ROH. Like I said last week, for all the chants of "You're Not Famous" given to Fairplay at the Supercard of Honor II show, he sure has used his fame (or is that infamy) to help the ROH cause. At the least that deserves a genuine "thank you" from the fans, if not ROH itself.
That said, if Fairplay returns one day to exact revenge on McGuinness, I won't hesitate to bring on the boos.
Jimmy Rave Signed to ROH…NO DUH…
Amid a swirl of rumors that Vince Russo wanted to bring Jimmy Rave into TNA, Ring of Honor released a news story on its website confirming that Rave had signed a contract with ROH. Of course, this news is a non starter to me, as TWO weeks ago I (well, okay, Dave Meltzer and the Wrestling Observer) reported that Rave was among the fifteen men who had signed with ROH. Don't remember? Let's go back to two weeks ago…
WAYNE'S WORLD FLASHBACK PARTY TIME EXCELLENT BLOOOODEEEDOOOP! BLOOOODEEEDOOOP! BLOOOODEEEDOOOP!
Along with Danielson, McGuinness, The Briscoes, Strong and Richards, Jimmy Rave has been confirmed to being signed to an ROH contract.
WAYNE'S WORLD FLASHBACK PARTY TIME EXCELLENT BLOOOODEEEDOOOP! BLOOOODEEEDOOOP! BLOOOODEEEDOOOP!
See…there you go. Crisis averted. Or something.
Pay Per View Availability—Some More Available Than Others ROH's first pay-per-view, "Respect Is Earned," will now air this July and August. Here is the latest scheduling info:
DISH: The premiere date is Sunday, July 1st. The time will be determined. DISH plans at least 10 replays over the month of July and there is a possibility for even more. "Respect Is Earned" could also be an all day DISH PPV Ticket, meaning it is available to order 24 hours a day.
TVN: "Respect Is Earned" will premiere on Sunday, July 8th at 8pm. There will be replays throughout July and Video On Demand (VOD) the entire month of August.
iN DEMAND: ROH's first PPV will air on Friday, July 20th at 8pm. There will be PPV replays throughout July and August. VOD will be available in early August and run until the end of the month. This means you can order "Respect Is Earned" anytime you want once it goes on VOD.
"Each partner is licensed to carry the event beginning July 1," Ken Gelman of G-Funk Sports & Entertainment said, "and run it through July and August, until the next one is available in September. Due to each partner's PPV and VOD schedules, it is their decision when and how often to schedule our events in these given windows. The same will hold true for future events. Like this note, as soon as we receive scheduling confirmation from our partners for future events, we will inform our fans."
Look for a list of cable affiliates for iN DEMAND and TVN soon on ROHwrestling.com.
While nothing is really wrong with this staggered release schedule per se, it is a bit of a downer that some potential viewers such as myself who are IN DEMAND users are going to have to wait until the end of the month and NOT the beginning of the month for this show. This could work well for ROH as the positive buzz of the show could garner more buys, but it could also backfire for them as the hype could stall out and not carry over to the July 20th debut, or even worse, the show could make its way to the internet for download on your veritable selection of torrent sites, therefore reducing the amount of buyers (who let's face it, a good number of which would have at least initially come from internet wrestling fans). DISH network users, consider yourself among the fortunate.
Danielson vs. The Field—I'll bet on Danielson Bryan Danielson's opponents have been signed for 6/8 in Boston and 6/9 in Philadelphia. Danielson is looking to gain momentum and put together a string of singles victories. Danielson wants to prove he is the man to beat in ROH. He is on a quest for a title match. 6/8 in Boston will see Danielson take on Jimmy Rave. 6/9 in Philadelphia will witness Danielson vs. Matt Sydal.
Looks like we have a mini storyline with Danielson looking for title contention, although seriously, since when does THE BEST WRESTLER IN THE WORLD have to prove anything like that? As far as the history behind these matches, Danielson and Rave had a very well received match back at the Fourth Anniversary Show. It was one of Rave's finer matches and showed that he could be taken seriously (although some fans don't want to) as a title contender. Danielson vs. Sydal is a first time encounter and therefore has a nice bit of "fresh taste" to it. It's your classic technical wrestler vs. high flyer encounter (think Bret Hart vs. 1-2-3 Kid).
Talented Talent to Demonstrate Its Talent The first talent lineups for July 27th in Long Island and July 28th in Edison have been announced. Save 20% on tickets to both shows now and see: ROH World Tag Team Champions Jay & Mark Briscoe; Bryan Danielson; Nigel McGuinness; Roderick Strong & Davey Richards of the No Remorse Corps; Matt Cross & Erick Stevens of The Resilience; Jimmy Rave; El Generico & Kevin Steen; Chris Hero with Larry Sweeney; Matt Sydal; Delirious; Claudio Castagnoli; Mike Quackenbush; Jigsaw; Gran Akuma; Hallowicked; plus more to be added!!!
Looks like the CHIKARA guys are racking up their appearances in ROH now. This will be their debuts in the Long Island and Edison markets. It may not be NYC, but it could be good enough for me to see Quackenbush and company in Edison. Also of note is that Hero is also back on the roster for these shows.
SHIMMER Tournament Headlines Volumes 11 and 12 We are less than two weeks away from the return of live SHIMMER Women Athletes action in the Chicago area. Volumes 11 & 12 of the SHIMMER DVD series will be taped on Friday & Saturday, 6/1 & 6/2, at the Eagles Club (6309 26th Street) in Berwyn, IL, which is roughly 10 miles from the Frontier Fieldhouse in Chicago Ridge. Tickets to the tapings are currently available at www.shimmerwrestling.com and will also be available at the door each night. Be advised that the last SHIMMER show sold out at the door. Featured as part of the two nights of tapings is the 16 woman, single elimination tournament to crown the SHIMMER Champion! Tournament participants will include 15 regular SHIMMER roster members, plus an international wild card entrant who has never appeared in SHIMMER before!
It's very smart that Dave Prazak waited a bit of time before instituting a women's championship. One, it follows the ROH format—as it took about six shows before a champion was decided back in 2002. Another good reason is that waiting helped to build up the name value and recognition factor of wrestlers to the ROH audience, such as Sara Del Rey, (Portugese Princess) Ariel, Cheerleader Melissa and MsChif. Now there is a deep tournament field a larger number of prospective winners. The match ups and seeding should be intriguing enough to get more buyers interested in the DVDs.
Morishima vs. Strong: Hot Dog Eating Contest June 9th in Philadelphia. The main event has been signed and it will be ROH World Champion Takeshi Morishima vs. FIP World Heavyweight Champion Roderick Strong. There will be only one belt on the line in this match. If Morishima retains the World Title against Jay Briscoe on 6/8 in Boston, he will put it on the line here. If Morishima loses the ROH World Title to Briscoe and Strong is still FIP Champion, Strong will put the FIP Heavyweight Title at stake.
A heel vs. heel match up for the title? Weird to say the least (although not unprecedented), but I doubt it will take much away from the in ring quality. I like the return to the "conditionals" of a championship match. If Morishima is champ, the ROH title on the line, if not, the pressure is on Strong. That's a very cool "little thing" that adds depth to a seemingly one off encounter.
Dayton Three Times Now for the news the fans in Dayton and Ohio have been waiting for as three main events have been signed for June 22nd. The first main event will pit two of the hardest kickers going today as KENTA will take on Rocky Romero!!! It will be very interesting to see how Davey Richards figures into this one as Romero is his teammate in the No Remorse Corps while KENTA selected him as his protege last year. This promises to be athletic wrestling at its best.
Claudio Castagnoli was granted a ROH World Tag Team Title rematch from the PPV stealing bout where he teamed with Matt Sydal to take on Jay & Mark Briscoe. Castagnoli was told he could pick any partner of his choice and he selected Chris Hero. Castagnoli & Hero vs. Briscoes 2/3 Fall World Tag Team Title Match will take place on 6/9 in Philadelphia. The winners of that match will defend the belts on 6/22 in Dayton against Matt Sydal, who will get to pick a partner of his choice. We'll have much more information on this big ROH World Tag Team Title Match after the Philly event.
The third main event will be a ROH vs. NOAH all star bout. ROH World Champion Takeshi Morishima & Naomichi Marufuji will take on the unlikely team of Bryan Danielson & Nigel McGuinness. ROH officials wanted ROH's best for this match and selected Danielson & Nigel. Danielson & McGuinness have agreed to team because they want to get in the ring with Morishima. This will be the first time that Danielson and Morishima step into the ring as opponents.
KENTA vs. Romero? Bring on the stiff kicks. Should be a good encounter and we will see if the Marufuji-Romero match was an isolated incident or if there could be something more to these kinds of matches for Romero. As far as Sydal's tag shot goes, well that's hardly a shock these days. I think ROH should offer free VD checks for its roster. Matt Sydal has been spreading himself all over this company for a tag title shot, and well, we never have actually discovered if he is free and clear of all diseases. The NOAH all stars vs. ROH all stars concept is one that has been building up for a while. I'd actually suggest expanding the concept further and having a four on four match, but I guess that can wait.
Bidding War for Dishonor Local promoters are still bidding to have "Death Before Dishonor V" in their home area. The announcement as to where it will be will be delayed.
Oh…okay there (rolls eyes)…I guess this is just a cute little newsbit to keep anticipation going for what is typically viewed as one of ROH's bigger shows. Still, a bidding war? Putting it that way makes me chuckle a bit
Danielson vs. KENTA not to be on Second ROH PPV?
For now, I count this among the rumor department until we get there, but there was a report I believe coming from PWInsider that Danielson vs. KENTA would not be on the second ROH PPV and instead stay exclusive to the DVD release. On the one hand, this will help keep up the number of DVD purchases due to the exclusivity of the match, but it seemed that the PPV build back on May 12th would have fit excellently well with putting the match on the next PPV. Building from PPV to PPV makes sense, but not including Danielson vs. KENTA would not seem logical when that's one of the big combinations being pushed on the debut show. More on this as it comes.
Hero's Sandwich
Greetings and salutations Hero-ites, it is I, your idol, your icon, your role model, not just in wrestling, but in life, Chris Hero back once again to tell you how it is. This week, I'm going to have to keep this short and sweet, as I am deep in training for my next series of matches in ROH. Unfortunately, I've had to deal with the idiocy that is Claudio Castagnoli for the past few days, as the Swiss idiot has come back to Metropolis to train with myself, Larry and Tank. I'm not quite sure how it is that I ever had any real success with him as my partner, as I'm rediscovering the fact that Claudio really is THAT dumb. Last weekend his stupidity cost us our first round match in the PWG tag team tournament. If I had entered that tournament with anyone else, someone with only a modicum of ability, I know that I would have walked out of that rec center in the heart of Los Angeles with 20 pounds of gold around my waist yet once again. Maybe the Swiss Idiot will be able to get his stuff together for our 2 out of 3 falls match against the Briscoes in Philadelphia on June 9th. If he doesn't, there will be hell to pay, and that's all I have to say about that.
What I DO want to talk about is the situation with ROH and their foray into Pay Per View programming. Yes, I did let you know how I felt about being left off the first PPV taping, but in case you missed my point, I will reiterate. It is unconscionable that the management of ROH excluded me from that event, and during this week, I have been contacted by at least 10,000 of my Hero-ites, telling me that they will be staging a boycott of "Respect is Earned", so that I, Chris Hero, will be given some respect by Cary and Gabe. When I forwarded all of those correspondences to the ROH front office, they immediately placed me on the second PPV taping that will be held in Chicago on June 23rd, which I am extremely excited to be a part of. Its even more exciting that I will be able to get my hands on that wanna-be punk, Nigel McGuinness one more time. Sure, he's given me a good run in the past, but I figured that even a wanker like Nigel deserves another shot at beating me, as he's never notched a win against me before. In a way, I feel sorry for him, what with how I've humiliated him so many times in the past, but this time, its not about me, its about my best bud, my super agent, Larry Sweeney. Nigel, somehow got the footage of him bushwhacking myself, Larry, and our honored guest in Detroit, Johnny Fairplay onto VH1 this week, and now, Larry feels as if he's been a victim of, as he put it, "prison sex". Larry is a good guy, a great wrestler, and an amazing agent, so I will step up and embarrass Nigel the way he embarrassed Larry. Revenge is a dish best served cold, and on June 23rd, dinner will come straight out of the ice box for McGuinness!
Next on my weekly agenda is the fact that I have yet to be signed to an official contract with ROH Wrestling, and this fact is starting to anger me greatly. I mean look at the list of B-level talents who they have given these deals to. It's like a who's who of the mediocre and the below average, if you ask me. Come on. Davey Richards, Rocky Romero and Jimmy Rave all got deals before me? Even the Swiss Idiot got one. What the hell is going on here? I know that I command more money than all of the aforementioned performers combined, but in my estimation, ROH needs a cornerstone to build upon, and we all know that I'm the guy best suited for that job. I already saved CHIKARA and CZW from the brink of bankruptcy, so, it would have just been plain logic for me to do the same for ROH. When they come to their senses, I know I'll get the offer I need, and then and only then, will I save ROH from itself, and more importantly, from "Godzilla" himself, the Pillsbury doughboy, Takeshi Morishima. If someone doesn't stop him soon, I think he actually might eat the championship belt. I've heard of being hungry for gold, but that's just ridiculous.
On that note, I will return to my intense workout routine. I still have to shock my abs and my glutes today, and later, Larry, Tank and myself will enter into deep meditation. I would invite Claudio to join us but in order to meditate and relax ones mind, one has to have a mind to begin with. And on that note, I take my leave. That is all, my Hero-ites. This has been your weekly moment of enlightenment, this has been your Hero's Sandwich. Sayonara, suckers!
Honorarium
-It's kind of funny, but the conclusion to Glory By Honor V Night 2 is the same as the end of Respect Is Earned—"American Dragon" Bryan Danielson in the ring celebrating to his music. Coincidence? In the land of Honor, probably not.
-Pelle Primeau's theme song, "Army of Zombie" by Lars and the Bastards, I don't even know what to say. Just great stuff. Upbeat, positive, funny. Good times. Although it does seem to suggest that Pelle's opponent has a predilection for eating brains. But in Adam Pearce's case, that would not be a surprise.
-Okay, I just clicked onto tnawrestling.com (NOTE: this item was written Saturday after finishing off last week's CoH) in order to browse for wrestling merchandise. As it usually does, when you open the front page, the TNA Today show annoyingly starts up automatically. So I'm watching the first thirty seconds on the show and they start showing the Explosion match—and its Homicide vs. Senshi. YES. ON EXPLOSION. Now not only has this match been most wanted by wrestling fans, but definitely by TNA fans and it seems like forever that Senshi / Low Ki was rumored to join up with homicide as part of LAX. So we get the singles showdown…ON A SHOW NO ONE WATCHES! I swear to god TNA must fucking have some tax write off for the Carters, because I don't know how much money they lose by giving away these matches. From Angle vs. Styles to Angle vs. Joe to Christian vs. Sting to Joe vs. Sting this week on Impact, TNA has blown through first run matches at an alarming rate. It's like they let the tap water in the sink keep running even though they're long since done getting a drink. Not that I didn't expect this to happen under the tyranny of Russo, Inc. I think the waste of talent and high profile matches might be even worse than the way WCW was booked at the end of their run. And yes, I know Russo wasn't booking all of it at the end, but the point still stands.
It's even worse to give away Sting vs. Joe, which should have been THE MONEY MATCH to legitimize Joe in TNA at the end of 2006 but never happened. God dammit, who are the ad wizards who came up with this one?
Oh it gets worse…because the guest on TNA…was ANTONIO INOKI!!!!
That's right…ANTONIO INOKI!!!
WHAT THE F**K IS WRONG WITH YOU TNA!
Could you at least put one of the biggest names to come out of Japan and possibly in wrestling history on a freaking episode of IMPACT???
This would be like when Bruno Sammartino came to ROH, if they never put him on the DVD or acknowledged his existence.
Inoki is hyping up his own new promotion and talking about the downturn in Japanese wrestling. Obviously he has never seen a NOAH show or a Dragon Gate match!
-Looking at the Velocity matches up on YouTube featuring current or former ROH wrestlers and just thinking about the what ifs… What if Danielson, Joe, Styles and Christopher Daniels all were signed up to the WWE? Would we have been watching THE greatest generation of talent in WWE history from 2003 onwards? Or would they have been misused and thrown away, released during Spring Cleaning like so many Rob Conways? Sometimes I really think WWE missed the boat on the 21st century professional wrestler.
-WWE dropped the ball on its production of the WWE Wrestlemania 23 DVD. With so many awesome segments from episodes of Raw and Smackdown leading up to the event, you'd think they'd owe it to themselves for the sake posterity, if not to the fans, to put all that great stuff on the extras for the DVD. Nope. While the Ultra super secret cool handshake double secret probation gatefold holographic velvet covered edition does come sealed in a really nice tin box, the contents of the extras inside are the weakest perhaps since the Wrestlemania 2000 DVD.
Among the notable missing moments:
No Trump appearances on Raw where he drops the dollar bills. No "billionaire bitch slap" sequence.
No Steve Austin taking Coach to task for the Federal Express delivery / bribe (although the original awesome segment where Austin is announced as special ref isincluded, so points for that).
No full version of the Shawn Michaels vs. JBL segment.
No Recap of the Money In the Bank Qualifying Matches, most of which were quite fun and good quality. I wouldn't have minded a few of the matches included in their entirety.
For that matter, no MVP vs. wacky made up foreign municipality champions. That makes me a sad bear.
Replacing the original Boogeyman skit on the main program with a far inferior alternate take.
On the positive side, the No Way Out rematch with THAT SUPERKICK is included on the DVD, as well as the pre show Flair / Carlito vs. Helms / Chavo Guererro tag match, so props for that. I just took another look at the third disc, the Hall of Fame DVD. The full versions of induction speeches by Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler and Dusty Rhodes are really quite fun and far superior to the watered down and edited versions that ended up on television (although most of Dusty's speech made it to air, at least the really fun and entertaining moments). So yes, ultimately the DVD set is worth picking up, but as with many things, it could have been so much more.
-While I have hacked away at TNA segments over the last several months (and in my mind rightfully so), I give credit when it's due and so I must say that this week's edition of iMPACT! was one of their better efforts in a very long time.
The Steiner Brothers vs. Team 3-D was thrilling television. All four men may have just instilled new life in their careers thanks to the brilliant promos each delivered on that show. Their work made me want to see that match, which is a rarity nowadays for TNA. Someone got a clue for half a second and realized that when you give wrestlers a simple and logical reason to fight (in this case, to prove the better team for all-times) you usually get quite compelling programming.
Samoa Joe vs. Sting, well, let's say it was pretty good for what it was and for the length of time that it was given. I still can't justify giving away such a high profile FIRST TIME EVER match up for free on television that only 1.2 million people watch every week when you could use the match as a selling point for a Pay Per View and make money. I also continue to be enraged and furious and TNA's insistence that they cut away to commercial two minutes after the opening bell. I mean, what's the point then? Make us wait for fifty minutes for the main event, then make us wait some more? Very frustrating. At least WWE has the seven minute overrun on Raw so that if they do take a commercial during the main event, you know you'll still get more on the back end of the show. TNA does not have that luxury. Their use of time does not make me want to give them more of the benefit of the doubt, or my money for purchasing their Pay Per Views.
But all that said, it was an enjoyable match for its short run time. Samoa Joe may get back some of his lost momentum yet.
I wonder if the Jarrett vs. Styles match will be altered or postponed given the unfortunate passing of Jill Jarrett. I'd think that given the situation, a change of plans would not be all that terrible. I'd also like to quickly send my thoughts and prayers to the Jarrett family during this time.
-Quite possibly, Supercard of Honor II could be YOUR show of the year, or at least the early leading candidate. The DVD is just packed from beginning to end with good to great matches, memorable moments and highlights.
At the end of the show there is a closing vignette of Lacey and Jimmy Jacobs lying down backstage, licking their wounds after the steel cage match. Becky Bayless tells them they should see a doctor, but they just lie back down and sort of have this weird embrace. I'm not quite sure what to think about this? Is this a sign that Lacey and Jimmy have somehow grown closer due to the violence of the match?
I should also note that the lovely Lacey looks extremely lovely indeed during this show. She and Jimmy hit just the right note in their interactions at the beginning of the tape (he looks at her and acts as if she's a Goddess, and well, she pretty much plays the part). Jacobs promo work for this show and for All Star Extravaganza III are top notch work and even better than the combo of promos he did for International Challenge / Final Battle 2006.
Dear Delirious
Well, it's that time again. I'd like to welcome back after a lengthy absence (and I promised him Chris Hero would be nowhere in sight), the one, the only, deranged green dude with a mask, Delirious!
No, no Delirious, I have to welcome you back! After all, I've returned to the column for a while now, but we haven't seen you for quite a while!
Right, well, anyway. How have you been? What have you been up to these last few weeks?
FISHING!
Wow! Really, you caught a fish that big? Awesome. You know, I've noticed you're speaking a little bit more clearly these days. It's almost like you've been getting tutored in English. Is this true?
1-800-A BAH-C-DEEEE-E-F-G HOOKED ON BAHONICS WORKED FOR ME!
Hey man, that's tremendous. Kudos to you. Well I suppose we should get right to it. As we have a backlog of letters for you and people can really use your advice. Should we get to it?
Yes. Well. Okay then. Here's our first letter:
Dear Delirious,
I'm writing it because I need your help. My friend and Resilience partner, Austin Aries has gone missing from Ring of Honor. I've put up "missing" signs all over the place and even contacted some milk companies to put his face on the back of the container. I really need to find him, because he is one of the toughest men around and a guy who myself and Erick Stevens can rally around to fight the nefarious No Remorse Corps. Can you use your psychic abilities to help us out? Tell us where we can find the triforce! Um, I mean, Austin Aries.
-Matt Cross
BAHBAHBAH NRC POOT! BAH SPIT ON YOU ROHDERICK STRONG! BAH! SORRRY MATT CROSS, BAH BAH NO BAH AUSTIN ARIES! BAHBAHBAH HIT YOU UP ON MYSPACE WITH INFO IF BAH FIND OUT!
Well, that's pretty self explanatory, although this is the first time I'm hearing about Delirious' psychic abilities. Next Letter~!
Look Delirious, you masked freak, I wouldn't even be writing this to you but I'm in a serious situation here. Listen, I put on that Repo Man mask on ONCE, as a joke and a way to get a cheap pop, to fool those idiot fans into believing I actually give a damn about them at all. But now I can't get this damned thing off! It's like it has a mind of its own. Dammit you green psychotic, you know a thing or two about masks, tell me what do to…or so help me I'll brain you with some Brass Knux!
-Pearced in Chicago
UH-OH…BAH BAH WATCHED SPIDERMAN 3? BAH MAY BE IN TROU-BAH! GET TO BAH TOWER RIGHT AWAY AND BAH BAH BAH BAH YOUR HEAD INTO DA BELL!
Right, those pesky symbiotes you know, always giving people problems. Good luck Pearced in Chicago. Lastly, we get this one, with no return address. Hmmm, there's a picture in here…
Hey Delirious, thanks for the memories! Maybe next time I'll smash your legs in to go with your head and back! Freak! XOXO-Roddy
WHIMPER…WHIMPER…
Ah, I'm sorry Delirious. I didn't see that one coming. That's a horrible thing for the NRC to do. Those bastards, they truly have no remorse, not even for D's sideline job as an advice columnist. Let's get out of here. Damn you Roderick Strong, damn you straight to hell.
Honor Culture
Here's a new feature I've wanted to get in for quite awhile now. As many of you may or may not realize, wrestling concepts seem to tie together interestingly to real world concepts. Many names of moves for instance, are allusions to peoples, places or things. Wrestlers might have nicknames or personalities that tie into other cool snippets of socity. ROH is no different. So on a regular basis, I will check in with a dose of the Honor Culture and show you where these lines between wrestling and the so called "real world" cross over. For example:
Culture Lesson 1: Tower of London
In ROH, the Tower of London is the finishing move of one Nigel McGuinness. Executed by placing an opponent in a seated position on the top turnbuckle, Nigel grabs his opponents neck and "walks" out a few steps so that his opponent makes a horizontal line. Nigel will then violently snap his opponent downward to the mat, where the opponent's head smashes to the mat at high velocity. Typically used as a finishing maneuver in Nigel's matches in 2006, as of late its given way to the rebound / jawbreaker lariat as his weapon of choice and pet finisher.The Tower of London now has become a part of a near fall situation and Nigel often uses or attempts the move at least twice during the match. It's a powerful move and one of my favorites to see live, because you get a great understanding of the impact of the move up close.
In the mainstream, the Tower of London is actually not one building, but a series of buildings and defensive walls located close together in England. Originally built in 1078 by William the Conquerer and located on the bank of the River Thames, the tower has at several times throughout history been a fort, a prison, a zoo (!), a place of execution and a royal palace. Also, the Tower of London is where the vaunted Crown Jewels (valued at 530 carats) are stored and heavily guarded (several attempts at stealing the jewels have occurred throughout history). I've visited the Tower of London and Tower Bridge on a trip to England some years ago. Your mileage may vary, but I enjoyed the sight seeing. It's a fascinating place.
Read an in-depth history of the Tower of London at Wikipedia
Culture Connection: Clearly, Nigel's British heritage and connections to the mother country are what should be conjured when he violently whiplashes his opponent's head to the mat at an acute 45 degree angle. For Queen and Country, indeed.
Going Home
**The Independent Buy In**
Support independent pro wrestling, ROH or non ROH, I don't care. But if you out there are spending so much time complaining about how WWE sucks, then dammit, spend some money so you won't have to spend so much time complaining. This list stays in the column and will be added to as the year goes on. Remember: don't bow out, BUY IN!
2007
**PWG Battle of Los Angeles 2006: Night One (Strong / Romero, CIMA / Cross, Deliirous / Generico, 8 Man Tag)
**SHIMMER Women's Athletes Volume 6 (MsChif / Melissa Last Woman Standing, Rebecca Knox / Allison Danger Pure Rules)
**PWG Hollywood Globetrotters (Super Dragon and Davey Richards vs. Roderick Strong and Jack Evans; Cape Fear (El Generico and Quicksilver) vs. Arrogance (Chris Bosh and Scott Lost); B-Boy vs. Frankie Kazarian; Alex Shelley vs. Chris Sabin.)
**PWG Beyond The Thunderdome (Super Dragon and Davey Richards vs. AJ Styles and Chris Daniels); Cape Fear vs. Arrogance; Joey Ryan vs. Chris Sabin)
**PWG Enchantment Under The Sea (Cape Fear vs. Briscoes; Matt Sydal vs. B-Boy; Super Dragon and Davey Richards vs. Arrogance; Austin Aries vs. Kevin Steen)
**wXw World Lightweight Tournament 2006 (Ares / Baron von Hagen, Pac / El Generico, Quackenbush / Roudin, 5 Way Tournament Match)
**ECWA Super 8 Tournament 2001 (Danielson / Low Ki, Danielson / Reckless Youth, Low Ki / Billy Fives, Danielson / Spanky)
**ROH FWA IPW:UK Frontiers of Honor 2 (Sydal / Richards, Cabana / Burridge, JC Thunder / Nigel McGuinness, Danielson / Brookside / Stone)
**PWG Battle of Los Angeles 2006: Night Two (Necro Butcher/Super Dragon, Hero/Horiguchi, Evans/Castagnolli)
**PWG Battle of Los Angeles 2006: Night Three (Generico / CIMA, Hero, Claudio, Necro, Romero / Cabana, Quicksilver, M-Dogg 20, Delirious, Generico / Sabin, Richards / Strong, Evans/ Horiguchi, Richards / CIMA)
**Chikara The Crushing Weight of Mainstream Ignorance (Quackenbush / Akuma, Steel / Steel, Sweeney / Kingston, Hair vs. Mask: Jigsaw / Icarus)
**Chikara King of Trios Night One (Order of the Neo Solar Temple / Los Ice Creams, Miyawaki, Yago & KUDO / Iron Saints, Sweeny, Eliis and Ryder vs. Neo Solar Temple POSEDOWN, Shima Xion / Nobutaka Moribe)
**SHIMMER Volume 7 (Daizee Haze/Cheerleader Melissa, Mercedes Martinez/LuFisto, Sara Del Rey/Nattie Neidhart)
**Chikara King of Trios Night Two (Sabin, Shelley and Dutt vs. Quackenbush, Jigsaw and Shane Storm / Hallowicked, Cheech and Cloudy vs. Lince Dorado, Pantera and Sicodelico Jr. / Olsen Twins vs. Miyagi and Yago / Quack T-Shirt Squad vs. Boyer and 2.0)
**Chikara King of Trios Night Three (Pantera, Lince Dorado & Sicodelico, Jr. vs. Mike Quackenbush, Jigsaw & Shane Storm / Kings Of Wrestling vs. Kudo, Yoshiaki Yago & Miyawaki / Mike Quackenbush, Jigsaw & Shane Storm vs. Kudo, Yoshiaki Yago & Miyawaki / Ricochet vs. Claudio Castagnoli / Daizee Haze vs. Sara Del Ray / Mokujin Ken vs. Mecha Mummy / Matt Sydal vs. Hallowicked)
The ROH List
Fifth Year Festival: NYC (Samoa Joe / Morishima, Homicide / Rave, Briscoes / Cabana & McGuinness, Albright / Whitmer, Evans / SHINGO / Xavier / Jacobs)
Fifth Year Festival: Philly (Homicide / Morishima, Sydal & Daniels / SHINGO & Evans, Briscoes / Generico & Steen, Castagnoli / Aries, McGuinness / Perkins)
Fifth Year Festival: Chicago (Morishima & McGuinness / Joe & Homicide, Cabana / Jacobs, Strong & Richards / Aries & Cross, Daniels & Sydal / The Briscoes, Albright / Castagnoli)
Fifth Year Festival: Liverpool (Joe / McGuinness, ROH World Tag Team Titles: The Briscoes / Doi & SHINGO / FIP Title: Strong / PAC, 2/3 Falls: Delirious / Matt Sydal) Fifth Year Festival: Finale (Joe / Homicide, Fight Without Honor: McGuinness / Rave, ROH World Tag Team Titles: Doi & SHINGO / Richards and Strong, Sydal / PAC, Falls Count Anywhere: Whitmer / Jacobs) All Star Extravaganza III (ROH vs. Dragon Gate 8 Man Tag, Strong / Evans, Mochizuki / Richards, Cabana / Sydal / Hero / Pearce, Homicide / Daniels) (NEW ADDITION Supercard of Honor II (CIMA, SHINGO and Yokosuka / Dragon Kid / Saito / Mochikzuki, Strong / Aries, Whitmer / Jacobs, Evans & Doi / Richards and Romero, McGuinness / Hero, Daniels & Sydal / Delirious & Jay Briscoe) (NEW ADDITION)
I have to admit that I have slowed down on my independent DVD purchases…I just don't have as much time as before in order to get in the required viewing time to recommend a lot of product. I do have a PWG order coming soon and the next cycle of orders I should get some new CHIKARA in, but until then this section needs your help! If you want to recommend some good independent wrestling to your fellow internet readers out there, drop me a line for the column.
ROH @ 411 This Week
Nick Marsico gets top billing this week for his very ROH edition of News To Start Your Weekend. Nick goes back in time to review the ROH Reborn: Completion show from July 2004, with Low Ki's return and CM Punk's face turn. He also gives you a complete overview of all that has been signed for the June 2007 ROH shows.
A quick word of acknowledgement and thanks to Nick Marsico and Larry Csonka for plugging my column during last week's edition of Rocketbusta Radio. Nick made a lot of cogent points about the ROH show in NYC and touched on my comments about the way ROH fans treat women's wrestling.
YOUR weekend of Honor continues as we look at this, your showcase, which consists of ROH Fifth Year Festival: Dayton and ROH Fifth Year Festival: Philly, brought to you by the fine purveyors of ROH review products at Brad Garoon and Jacob Ziegler. All of this can be yours, if the price is right.
Matt Short is in the day after me on Sundays but I don't want to neglect to mention his column The Navigation Log, which brings 411 readers up to speed on the Dragon Gate promotion.
Samuel Berman comes home to ROH with a closer look at Bryan Danielson vs. Azrieal in this week's Independent Mid Card.
Joe Estee continues to hand out Keys to the Game like they were keys to the city. Meaning every C and D level celebrity is bound to get one eventually.
Buy or Sell continues to be the independent record label that is an offshoot of a major. Fact or Fiction focuses on TNA and WWE, meanwhile BoS gives you the 411 on what's up in PWG.
Bayani heads up that Buy or Sell. He also tries to navigate the waters of straight and gay in the wrestling world in this week's edition of (Deep BREATH)…Truth B Told.
My bro Stuart Carapola is currently touring Toronto, one of my favorite cities to be in while traveling in Canada. It's like a hipper and cleaner NYC. Boy, I bet I get major point from Stephen Randle for that one. Anyway, Stu still comes in with the columns. First he covers The Streak (not DiMaggio's, The Underaker's Wrestlemania win streak) in That Was Then. Then Stu covers ECW and TNA in Friendly Competition.
Larry Csonka remains the big boss man with the big boss columns. Check out his 4R's and a look back at his first column ever for 411 with a review of TNA's World X cup!
Calhoun makes a great argument for the prestige of the U.S. Championship in his Ripple Effect column.
Likewise, 411 continues to provide damned intelligent wrestling writing with Halden's look at the idiocy of Sabu and Weyer's compelling look at the idea of a World title in his new Shining the Spotlight.
Steve Cook continues to answer the questions that really matter in Ask 411.
The 24th day of his bondage.
With that taken care of, we have also taken care of this week's edition of the column. How about that? Don't forget to send in YOUR Desert Island DVD picks. Next week, more goodness with the return of the ROH Stockmarket and Money Players, a preview of 6/8 in Boston, MA and much more!
Be good you all and enjoy your Memorial Day weekend!
Brooklyn! DAH EM BAH SEE!
--Ari--
