Truth B Told 6.21.07: Smackdown in the Dumps
Posted by Bayani Domingo on 06.21.2007
From wrestling Utopia to Friday Night Heat, how Smackdown’s fate might just rest in 3 little fingers.
Admit it, most of you probably stayed up to watch ECW this week. There were two big matches announced and although they could have used at least another 5 minutes each they pretty much delivered what it was supposed to. It established the 4 main players in ECW and led to two wins from two of the young mid-card wrestlers they want to push as legitimate future threats. It wasn't a great show by any means, but it proved that ECW has now become the 2nd most intriguing show in the WWE. So how the hell did that happen? Two words come to mind: The Draft. I'm here today to testify in front of the IWC and Meltzer himself that ECW has now seemed to surpass Smackdown as possibly the 2nd most watchable show in the "e". Oh Big Blue Brand, how the mighty has fallen.
I'm going to leave RAW out of this equation because they are always going to be the top show no matter what you say. Biggest stars, best night to be televised, and it's the de-facto flagship of the "e". ECW has just recently turned a bit of a corner, the supplemental draft actually did bring a bit of sunlight at the end of the tunnel. Now Benoit's essential trade for Lashley did a lot for the rest of the roster if not for himself considering that now the other 3 main guys can work with a veteran and put on better matches, it also brings the level of competition down to an equal playing ground as Benoit's questionable booking makes it seem that he's just as vulnerable as anyone else to being upset by a youngster (See: MVP) while still carrying enough cred to be ECW's ace performer. What they also got was a legit upper mid-card prospect in Johnny Nitro and a true douchebag heel in The Miz. While I was questioning the move originally it came to me that if they ever decided to turn CM Punk heel or at least ‘tweener, they could move Cor Von to the ‘tweener/Face side by merely having him feud with the biggest douchebag on the roster, The Miz. ECW is pretty set with their roster now, but what about Smackdown?
Let's take a look at what seems to be the pecking order on Smackdown as it stands right now:
Main Event Edge, Batista, Great Khali
Mid-Card Kane, MVP, Fit Finlay, Matt Hardy, Mark Henry, Ric Flair, Chris Masters
Lower Card Kenny Dykstra, Dave Taylor, Eugene
Tag Division Deuce & Domino, Bret & Brian Majors
Cruiserweights Chavo Guerrero, Funaki, Jamie Noble, Jimmy Wang Yang, Shannon Moore
Women Krystal Marshall, Michelle McCool, Victoria, Torrie Wilson
Injured List Rey Mysterio Jr., Undertaker, Ashley, Hardcore Holly, Gregory Helms
Now first thing I'm going to do is ignore the "Injured List" and "Women's Division". Basically because they don't figure into the mix right now and especially because the women's division consists of 1 female wrestler and 3 useless (albeit bangable) chicks who probably are better left to "backstage interviews" and valeting real wrestlers. That leaves us with some questionable divisions all unto themselves.
The tag division consists of two teams. Meaning every Tag Title match on SMackdown will basically consist of the same 4 guys every week. no, none of them are good wrestlers. Basically it's a generic team of 50's greasier vs the bastard stepchildren of the Von Erichs, 80's style. Great idea for the bookers to move Regal off Smackdown along with LonDrick. We can pretty much say that the tag division is as dead as the cruiserweight division now and without at least one more credible team that can actually WORK, we might as well forget these titles even exist. Expect a team from OVW to be called up to win the belts within 1 to 2 months time. If there was ever a time to debut the New British Bulldogs/Hart Foundation 2K7, it's NOW. Not right now, but RIGHT NOW. I already cringe at the Dalton's debuting. Chances are however that the "e" will just throw together two guys who aren't doing anything, probably some cruisers.
Speaking of the cruiserweights, let's not. Seriously. Funaki and Shannon Moore are jokes, while Jimmy Yang has been turned into one. Chavo Guerrero, while the most solid worker there, just isn't a traditional cruiserweight in that he's a small heavyweight and works a heavyweight style, which is great for the "e" in that they want all their guys to work that way, but bad for the fans who long for the days of Essa Rios, Taka Michinoku, and Paul London. While Yang has some decent moves it's clear that he's like a Paris Hilton dress after a night out at a club; spotty.
At this point having Jamie Noble take the title seems to be the best option however he's currently a heel. The CW division has not only been ignored but just isn't "state of the art" anymore. Luckily the X-Division has been booked so poorly and their guys so misused that no one can really blame the "e" for not being able to keep up. Seems like CW's everywhere are being forgotten. Having Daivari drafted away seems like a bad plan, but considering the "e" doesn't care about cruisers, well it's a moot point. The Cruiserweight Title is basically SD's answer to the Women's title. Meaning it has potential and credible workers available, but is ultimately forgotten and worthless. The only thing that could save this division with the exception of London/Kendrick coming back, is to bring in another worker or two that isn't associated with Jobberitis, and let Noble, Chavo, Yang, and Moore cut loose. Look for some OVW guys to debut soon as well, I seem to remember there is still a ex-Spirit Squad-er or two lying around. Jeter perhaps?
The lower card guys are basically cast offs from RAW or in Dave Taylor's case, a casualty of the Draft. Taylor had a promising tag team with Regal that was cut short after he was drafted to basically put over Santino Marella. I'm not sure that Taylor will be more than a JTTS, but if the "e" was smart they would call up Paul Birchall right away to replace Regal and get Birchall some more seasoning as well. Eugene is stuck in a hard place as his antics are better suited for Smackdown, but his gimmick has outlived it's shelf life and unless they want to rehash the Regal/Eugene team with Taylor as the replacement for Regal then they are better off just letting him job to the mid-carders till he's released. The sad thing is that in real life Nick Dinsmore is a better wrestler than ¾ of the roster now. Kenny is…well Kenny is either a really tall cruiserweight or a really skinny mid-carder. His team with Nitro was promising as well, but now it looks like he gets to fight it out in the lower card till the "e" decides whether him, MVP, or Masters will get a shot at the upper mid-card when Mark Henry inevitably gets hurt, Khali is finally released, or Rey Mysterio needs a "welcome back" job. If they were smart they would team Taylor up with Birchall and move him to the tag division and Kenny would run the "Matt Hardy loses weight to dominate the cruisers" angle to beat up on them till he's ready to feud with Hardy or Flair again. Still a very disappointing and thin part of the roster.
Smackdown has serious "love handles" as it is very thick around the mid-section. It's like a fat chick with a "front butt" or "Gunt" as it were, no matter how hard it tries, Smackdown just can't seem to move that weight from the middle. The good thing is that the mid-card is ripe with talent. From veterans willing to put over the young guys (Flair, Finlay), to monsters who are tettering between the Upper Mid-card and lower Main event with enough Main Event exposure to transition to either level (Mark Henry, Kane), to some young guys with potential who aren't quite ready to take the next step yet (MVP, Masters). Then you have Matt Hardy. The real problem is that you only have have only 3 faces and a heel champ. While the purpose of a mid-card is to test out the wrestlers thought of as the next Main Eventers, you need credibility. Kane and Flair seem almost past the point of needing a title reign or even being able to carry a brand on their back. Sure a nostalgic final Flair title reign would be nice, but ultimately does nothing for anyone. The mid-card needs another credible face QUICK. Right now that only leaves Matt Hardy as a guy still in his prime who could make the leap up to the next level, the question is: would you care if he did?
In all seriousness Matt Hardy is a good worker and a feud with Edge over the belt seems like it might work. Problem is that he was jobbed out so thoroughly on RAW that he had to go to Smackdown as "loser". Add to the fact that he's more over as a tag team wrestler and you have a problem. While perennial mid-carders and tag team wrestlers who have been overlooked veterans have gone on to win the WHT with some success in the past (King Booker, JBL) they were HEELS. It's easy to book a chickenshit heel title reign when you can pair them with cronies who can keep them on top. It's harder to do that for a ‘face'. Take Rey Rey for example. His title reign was uglier than a Trevor Murdoch ring rat. But don't think for a moment I wouldn't support an Edge/Hardy feud over the title. They just need a bit of build first. First off is having Hardy do 1 of two things: 1) have him take the US Title off MVP, or 2) have him beat Mark Henry. That's really all it's going to take to build him back up. Have him beat MVP and have Edge make him lose the title back to him after wanting to make his life miserable on Smackdown like he did on RAW, or have him beat Mark Henry and show that he's a legit threat to the title. Simple as that and the best options there are considering this next section.
The main event scene is thin and about to get even thinner. While it's almost a given Batista will lose his match against Edge and end their feud, my guess is someone will cost him the match (Khali or Henry) and spark that feud. At that time Edge will be out of challengers. Henry is still kind of feuding with Kane and let's say Khali is feuding with Batista, while Flair and MVP are also feuding. That really only leaves Matt Hardy and Chris Masters. Masters is not the guy, I'll say that with the utmost of conviction. So it really leaves Hardy to get us through the summer. I think the most likely scenario is to have Henry go over Kane and cost Batista the match at the next PPV which will leave Kane to battle Edge for the title over the summer. It makes a lot of sense if they want to let Edge look legit by going over the two biggest monster faces on SD while giving him a fairly lengthy title reign. This also would give time to build Hardy back up into a credible threat again. While some people will argue for Flair getting a shot, I'm still not sold on him being consistent enough to be able to really put Edge over in good long matches. The guy is old, he's not the man he used to be and in all honestly needs to retire sooner than later.
What is so puzzling about this is that while we always think of SD as a phoenix which will inevitably rise from the ashes, this time around it is rather questionable. Look at the best young talent on the roster: Edge, Matt Hardy, MVP, Kenny, Mas…okay not him, but that only makes 4 guys really. ECW has at LEAST that many with half the roster and TV time. What's more, all of them except Hardy are heels and work better as heels. While John Cena constantly guys new guys built up so he can go over them and further build his reputation, Edge has been booked like a joke. He had two abbreviated title reigns lasting less than a tri-mester, then is being booked on a show with only 1 true proven main event guy left on the roster…still young enough to not qualify for the $5.99 chicken fried steak special at Dennys before 5 pm. For some reason Vince must hate Edge. Can you think of any other reason why he's being screwed so hard?
Edge is THE top heel in the "e" right now and although a title reign on Smackdown is nice, it ultimately is meaningless if its largely forgettable and uncontested. Kind of like Lashley's ECW title reign. While Edge has done his part to create a great character for himself and made Vince a bit of cash by having Lita ride the ol' "O-S-C-A-R" pony while Matt was away, he's been pretty much held back. My guess is it's mostly due to HHH's jealousy and paranoia, but who knows? Great wrestlers are made great by great feuds and matches, while Edge got a few decent ones from Cena, he'll need more than a little help on the Big Blue Brand. Who really do you trust to be able to perform great back and forth and compelling matches against Edge? Batista, Kane, Flair, or Matt Hardy? Yeah, tough choice. Either way, with his win against Batista coming up it will help solidify Edge's most successful title reign to date as well as give Batista a nudge back to the upper mid-card to turn back to a bad ass ‘tweener with some face-like charisma while gaining more momentum after killing the rest of the lower and middle card. Something both guys need right now as I wouldn't put Batista out to pasture just yet. While Rey Rey may soon be returning, a feud with Edge seems inevitable if lame, but something tells me he'd be a better as a catalyst for a Batista heel/'tweener turn. Yeah, I DID steal that off the SDvsR video game. Suck on that THQ!!
Smackdown got screwed in the draft. Let's be honest. As it stands now you have two proven main event guys with any following, Edge and Batista, a few guys in the mid-card who could step up to the plate. The mid-card is packed but every other division is bare. I haven't seen a brand this thin on talent since Miss 411 pageant. Seriously, JT is running unopposed again this year, it's just embarrassing now. At this point I'm thinking the show needs an overhaul in the way it's working. Keep the show at 4 matches tops and let them all run at least 10 to 15 mins long. If you want to feature Edge as your one true main event guy and keep everyone else hovering around the upper mid-card then do it. We have to break from the norm of having heel vs face feuds here as Edge should be facing any and everyone with the goal of keeping his title. Be it Khali, Miz-zark, Batista, Chavo, Hardy, or Funaki, just build the show around Edge the way RAW builds itself around Vince. Okay, maybe a bad example.
The point is, this could be a chance to not only build Edge up as a legit centerpiece but also bring Matt Hardy up to the top as well. It seems like Vince is so dead set on building up only one wrestler per brand at the expense of everyone else. He jobbed out everyone to Cena, jobbed out everyone to Lashley, and the only reason I don't think that will happen with Edge is because for some reason Vince must hate Edge. I'd love to see this as an opportunity to build up two guys simultaneously like they tried to do with Edge and Cena, only this time, let them both stay on top together. Matt Hardy is one of those guys we all like during the TLC days of yore. He was the smart Hardy who stayed off smack and paced most of the matches, he was like the old N64 you still have. Sure he was super cool back in the day, but from time to time you'd dust it off and relive the good old days, no matter what new fancy game system came around. But something happened, something horrible. Or rather, someone Whore-able. It turned Matt all emo and made you kind of hate him a little. While you sympathized with the guy, it also made you kind of look within and ask yourself, "was I that depressing and whiny when Melissa dumped me? Oh god...I was wasn't I? I wrote those poems, I blogged all day long, I ever listed to that mixed tape like 20 times a day...oh man I sucked". But you know, Matt got past that, and if he comes out fighting and says, "hey, Edge, I don't get a f*ck about that Ho, now I'm just coming for your belt because no one knows you better than me and no one else here can keep up with you like I can. This time it ain't about that thing that was hangin' around your crotch, it's about that thing hanging around your waist". I really believe he can bring back the momentum and get the crowd behind him again. Because as much as Edge has that IWC cred now a days, I can't believe that people wouldn't mind seeing those two trade the belt a few times during the year.
Weird isn't it? Former Sad sack Emo boy Matt Hardy just might be the guy to save Smackdown. As much as I believe Edge to be the golden boy, I just think he needs that big feud that will make people care again to put him over the top. It's not enough to hold the belt if you only beat up guys no one gives 2 shits about. It's about finally doing a feud right that should have been done 2 years ago. It's about taking the saddest roster on the planet and creating a long ongoing feud that people are going to tune in to watch. A few minor changes here and there, a little spit shine and spackle and no one will even realize how bad the rest of the show is. But with a little luck here and there, with a newly ‘tweener Batista, a debuting British Bulldog renaissance, a recycled Kenny and Flair, and a centerpiece feud between two men that deep down inside know just how good they could be together. Well, shit, maybe Smackdown has a chance of rising from the ashes after all.
The Truth
Seems so simple doesn't it? A few changes to the roster, 3 or 4 call ups, a shift in attitudes, and a slow build to a previously botched feud. Yeah, I don't know why Vince doesn't hire me already to write for him? Oh yeah, that's right, I don't have Hollywood experience and I probably would have suggested trading Torrie Wilson to Penthouse for a centerfold and a box of cheese fries. Still, as much as I wanted to bash Smackdown when I started writing, I realized that it will probably be alright. As much of a Batista mark as I am, the dude is a fellow Pinoy after all, I gotta admit it. The two men who could bring back that Big Blue magic just happen to be two of the guys that made me fall in love with tag team wrestling 7 years ago. The "Rated R Superstar" and V.1, who'd have thunk it? To be honest, I'm not the biggest Matt Hardy fan there is, but there is just something about the guy I feel I can get behind, and if I can get behind a ‘plucky babyface' then that's saying something. When all is said and done, this isn't just a matter of V.1 deserving his shot to shine, it's a matter of saving a brand. Besides, with that championship type money coming in, maybe Matt can finally get some activator for that dried out white man jheri curl.
Coming Up Short
I could not care less about Ron Killings leaving TNA, but Konnan is a huge loss to the roster as well as one of the best Tag Teams they have on the roster. LAX will suffer as a result of his loss. Although Homicide is manageable on the mic it was Konnan who was able to get them to the top of the tag ranks and helped them because THE best tag team in 2006. There was talk of Konnan being upset with LAX being depushed in favor of the Dudleyz and jobbing to thrown together teams for the sake of the main event and mid-card. I can't argue with that, but I still think his involvement is vital to LAX succeeding. Right now the problem is that they've backed themselves into a corner because there are few people that can come in to manage them. Jim Mitchell would be great and if Ricky Banderas does in fact come into TNA then it would make sense, problem is Banderas wasn't coming in to be a Puerto Rican national, he was going to be a monster, that and what does Mitchell know about Latino pride? Really how many Latino managers/mouthpieces does TNA have at its disposal? Is Hector Guerrero a reasonable ‘heel manager'? Probably not. What is sad is that TNA finally seems to have a well put together tag division again with the Murder City Machine Guns, Bashams, and LAX making up for Team 3D and VKM, but now, who knows? I think this is one problem that is going to haunt TNA not only because it will hurt LAX, but it sends some bad signals to the rest of the locker room when two long time members up and leave. Well TNA I hope you have a back up plan because right now you seem to be coming up short…of tag teams…and morale.
6 Degrees of…
Dub-C
As for this week's 6DO topic, you asked for a doozy, and I hope I don't disappoint. My new "celebrity-I'd-most-like-to-have-sexytime-with" is Katherine Heigl. (Mmmm...Katherine Heigl.) I never realized how truly hot this woman is. Anyway, in the movie "Knocked Up", she delivers a baby. One can say the baby was a special delivery, no? Which brings me to my most all-time favourite jobber to the stars, S.D. "Special Delivery" Jones. So please, good friends, link Katherine Heigl to S.D. Jones in 6 degrees.
Yeah, I really have been diggin' on Ms. Heigl for a while now, especially after watching "Knocked Up", which incidentally I enjoyed more than "The 40 Year old Virgin". Then again I was in a position to enjoy ‘40' perhaps more than some of the IWC. Hang in there guys, your day will come…uh….yeah. Well we'll go ahead and link Katherine up with S.D. now.
When I first heard about "Special Delivery" Jones, I was puzzled at how a wrestler could use a paperboy gimmick in the ring. Yeah, I was so young and naïve then, although I wouldn't doubt it if that ends up the case when Mikey gets his post-Spirit Squad make over. Well there you have it, any perspective participants for the upcoming "6DO King of Kings" tournament would be wise to get in a winning entry as so far the spots are filling up fast. *okay, two is fast right?*
Whatchu talkin' bout readers?
Light in the In-Box this week, guess some of you are on summer vacation…or in jail. Either way, send me an e-mail, maybe I'll send you a cake with a nail file. Or maybe just a Ho-Ho with a couple paper clips.
After seeing SmackDown get screwed over on the Draft, I expected them to at least have some help from the supplementary draft on WWE.com. Should know by now shouldn't I?
RAW
Gains: London and Kendrick, The Sandman, Daivari, William Regal, Jillian Hall
Losses: Kenny Dykstra, Viscera, Victoria, Johnny Nitro, Eugene
SMACKDOWN
Gains: Kenny Dykstra, Bobcore Holly, Major Brothers, Victoria, Eugene
Losses: London and Kendrick, The Miz, Daivari, William Regal, Jillian Hall
ECW
Gains: Viscera, The Miz, Johnny Nitro
Losses: The Sandman, Bobcore Holly, Major Brothers
Raw's done okay for itself, gained the best tag-team in the company, while really the other moves for this brand were just jobbers moving around, but what sense does it make to send Victoria to SmackDown when the women's division is weak enough as it is?
ECW has also done okay, the Majors were no use without a tag division, Holly was injured anyway, and The Sandman is likely to be gone within a few months. Nitro could use a show like this to develop well, stick him in the top of the card with the likes of Benoit and Punk and he could put on some entertaining matches. And while a lot of people don't like The Miz, I think he has improved considerably since his debut and he could do well on ECW with his irritating persona.
But SmackDown has been fucked over again. Gaining one of the best women wrestlers in the company means nothing without a women's division. The Majors could be a decent addition, but not at the expense of London and Kendrick. And Regal going also takes away a tag-team. On Raw he'll just be a jobber, whereas if at least he'd gone to ECW he'd have stood a chance of getting the push he deserves. Without Regal, what's there for Dave Taylor to do as well? He'll be back as a trainer/road agent/whatever soon. Eugene and Holly? Jobbers. No-one cares, and I can't see that changing any time soon. But I'm sure Holly will get his yearly push of boredom anyway.
The SmackDown roster (not counting injuries) now consists of:
World Title Contenders: Edge, Batista, Kane, Mark Henry, The Great Khali
US Title Contenders: MVP, Finlay, Hardcore Holly, Matt Hardy, Ric Flair
Cruiserweight Title Contenders: Chavo Guerrero, Jimmy Wang Yang
Tag-Team Title Contenders: Deuce and Domino, Major Brothers
Divas: Ashley, Cherry, Kristal, Maryse, Michelle McCool, Torrie Wilson, Victoria
Jobbers: Chris Masters, Dave Taylor, Eugene, Funaki, Jamie Noble, Kenny Dykstra, Shannon Moore
Wow, what a bunch. I understand that WWE have to have Raw as the A-Show, but does SmackDown really need to be weakened this much?
And here's my previous win to enter the tournament of champions:
http://www.411mania.com/wrestling/columns/49075/Truth-B-Told-12.28.06:--Guess-What-I-learned-This-Year?.htm
http://www.411mania.com/wrestling/columns/49265/Truth-B-Told-1.04.07--Whats-Best-For-Business.htm
Turns out I had two wins actually. One of them may have been by default as no-one else entered, but it still counts.
Ian Bryant
Smackdown won't be okay for a good long while, but I think if they follow my lead they'll be fine. I'm sure OVW has a few guys ready to hit the Big Blue and so help me if it's Siaki....oooh.... RAW has absolutely RAPED that poor roster and considering all things, maybe it ain't so bad. I mean, 3 matches a show aren't bad if they go 15 to 20 mins right? Oh wait...they still have Chris Masters right? Make that 2 to 20 minutes. Oh yeah, consider yourself entered in the brackets now too Ian.
Liked your column this week, and agree wholeheartedly with your assessment. I do have to say, though, that RAW was one of the best I have ever seen. I put the kids to bed early, hopped on over to my buddy's house and we watched from beginning to end (with cold Canadian beer in hand). And I am not embarassed to say we both marked out like 12-year-olds when Vince's car exploded. We're still talking about it. Fan-freakin'-tastic.
I read with extreme interest Mark Satrang's letter, and especially your comment about the 6DO Tournament Of Champions. Dude, I'm so there. I look forward to taking on such legends as Satrang and Pryor. I have won three times, including this past week. And despite the fact that this past week's win was by default 'cause no one else entered, I'll take it if it means an automatic birth.
(As I, too, am extremely lazy, I have not linked your columns with my wins, however all three wins have been in the past two months. I was the one who suggested Tom Wopat and Cathie Lee Crosby if that helps.)
My 6DO entry for this week is coming in part 2 (although I know I can't win 'cause I won last week...see how dedicated I am?).
Double C (Corey Cotton)
I had a weird feeling when I saw that limo sitting there all by its lonesome then when it blew up I called for my girlfriend to come over and watch. All she said was, "pffftt....that's retarded" and went back to her computer. Yeah, pretty much summed the whole thing up for me. I just hope it ends up being Ted Turner that ordered the "hit". Yeah looks like so far you're the 2nd entrant in the tournament. Anyone else? I believe we even have some eligible 411 staff.
Before I forget, a special shout out to The Jza as I finally got to sit down and take a look at the paper he wrote for school on New Jack. Well, I wasn't standing, I was on a treadmill, but still, riveting stuff. Professor B gives you a A- for the effort Jza. Why the (-)? Well it was a paper about New Jack...and you didn't even include one "crack ass cracka" at all. C'mon man, keep it real.
6 Degrees Results
#3
No body, ya bunch of lazy bastards you…
#2
Double C (Corey Cotton)
You asked for more than one entry this week, so here goes:
#1 -
1. Togi Makabe and Shiro Koshinaka beat Giant Bernard and Travis Tomko in the finals of the 2006 IWGP Provisional Tag Team Champions Tournament.
2. Travis Tomko / Tyson Tomko has had a long partnership in both WWE and TNA with Christian Cage.
3. Christian Cage defeated Jeff Jarrett at TNA Against All Odds 2006 to win his first NWA/TNA World Heavyweight Championship.
4. Jeff Jarrett retained his NWA World Heavyweight Championship against Jeff Hardy at TNA Victory Road 2004 with the help of outside interference from a debuting Kevin Nash.
5. At Wrestlemania XI, Kevin Nash / Diesel was accompanied to the ring by Pamela Anderson.
6. Pamela Anderson was Tool Time Girl Lisa on the TV show "Home Improvement", which starred Richard Karn.
#2 -
1. Togi Makabe won the WEW World Title on September 12, 2006 by beating Kintaro Kanemura.
2. On May 5, 1996, Kintaro Kanemura faced Cactus Jack in a Caribbean Spider Net Glass Double Hell Death Match for the IWA King of the Death Match honour, which Cactus Jack held.
3. Cactus Jack / Mick Foley was one half of the tag team The Rock & Sock Connection, the other half being The Rock.
4. The Rock starred in the 2005 movie "Be Cool", which boasted the appearance of Steven Tyler of Aerosmith.
5. Steven Tyler also made an appearance in the 1993 movie "Wayne's World 2", which starred the versatile James Hong as Cassandra's father.
6. James Hong guest starred on a 1996 "Home Improvement" episode entitled Games, Flames & Automobiles, a series which starred Richard Karn.
Well, back to work.
Not bad Dub-C, but I'm fairly disappointed you didn't link Pamela to "Barb Wire" somehow. What a cinematic classic.
#1.
Here's my (pretty weak) 6 Degrees entry this week anyway (with a lot of Wikipedia help again)
1. Richard Karn played Tim Allen's co-host on Home Improvement.
2. Tim Allen voiced Buzz Lightyear in Toy Story, while Tom Hanks voiced Woody.
3. Tom Hanks played the character of Forrest Gump in the film of the same name. In the build up to WrestleMania 21 this was parodied by Eugene.
4. Eugene's return from injury in 2005 saw him be the first person to beat Kurt Angle in the 'Kurt Angle Invitational' hometown heroes challenge.
5. Kurt Angle's February 2007 New Japan Pro Wrestling debut featured him teaming with Yuji Nagata.
6. Yuji Nagata beat Togi Makabe in the 2007 New Japan Cup Final.
Ian Bryant
I'm giving Ian the win here for being every so slightly more balanced with the wrestler/non-wrestler links. That and I totally hated Wayne's World 2. seriously, me and my friend have this ongoing argument about how it is almost never the case when a sequel is better than the original movie. We agreed on Terminator and she keeps throwing Superman 2 in my face. I will however agree that "No Holes Barred 2" was far superior to the 1st installment. I just think the whole storyline came together better, that and it had that bonus bukkake scene, but I've already said too much and I don't want to ruin it for you guys. Okay Ian, you've officially hit 6DO "Mid-Card" with that win and you're well on your way towards becoming a 6DO legend. And by that I mean the thing that tells you where the GAP, Orange Julius, and Wetzel Dog are in the mall. Congrats and make sure that your entry next week will keep the win totals down of possible rivals in the "6DO KoK" tourney.
Left Overs…
Not to be outdone by John Cena, Ashley is rumored to be competing on "Survivor" in the upcoming season. When asked what her strategy was to win the game Ashley responded, "Just like the RAW Diva Search…I just hope the owner doesn't have an ass-to-mouth fetish too".
Samoa Joe seems to be suffering with bulging discs in his back, but is working through the injury for now. When he went to the doctor he also asked about the bulging discs in his chest to which his doctor informed him that they were simply his breasts.
Steve-O still talkin' shit on myspace about the WWE. With an attitude like that he'll never make their "Top 8".
I love how the 4.2 rating RAW got this week is being attributed to Vince's explosion angle. You know, maybe it also has a little to do with the fact that RAW just got 83 new main event wrestlers. At this point I'm surprised that Lita isn't a suspect in the case. I mean, how many men has she blown in career….oh…up. Nevermind.
I've always wondered this, but does a "Brainbuster" have any effect on Eugene?
‘Taker vs Remax set for Summerslam. The Deadman is now a real estate investor in Colorado. I think it would be awesome to have ‘Taker as your real estate agent when you're looking for a new house. "These are all walk in closets, the kitchen counters are all marble, and the master bedroom is enormous and has special sound dampening double insulated walls that let you rest…in…peace!!"
UWF is holding a 3 day tag team tournament featuring 10 teams including Too Cool, LAX, The Extreme Horsemen (Corino/CW Anderson) and originally the Steiner Bros. Possible other entries include: The Thrashers, Special K, the American Males, Lanny & Lodi, Laverne and Shirley, the…okay, I have no fuckin' clue, but I'm figuring a Squiggy run-in would be in order.
Former Montreal Expo Warren Cromartie got his first win in Japan over Tiger Jeet Singh last Sunday. Chances are this is his first win period. He did play for the Expos in the 80's after all.
Daivari recently put on what looks like 20 lbs of muscle since he was last seen in ECW. My guess is RAW also got his bottle of "Flintstone's Chewable Human Growth Hormones" in the supplemental draft as well. Hey, Khali got to keep his interpreter in the regular draft right? So Daivari kept his Supplements in the Supplemental Draft, seems fair to me. "We are Flintstones Kids, 10 Million Stroooong…and Doping".
The Miz is apparently going to be featured prominently in ECW, but this time as a sex symbol that all the women want. This will probably lead up to the ECW Nitro Girls breaking up. Wow, I guess they're right: The only way to fight useless pussy is with more a more useless pussy. *The More You Know*
Random Asian Bitch Lookin' Good Pic of the Week
Funny how the Japanese are such "work rate" fanatics. I believe hers was $300 an hour.
The WSX Champion, Ricky Banderas, has been stripped of the Championship due to "unsportsmanlike activities unbecoming to a champion". I would assume in WSX those activities would be snorting a line of coke off an immigrant 16 year old girl…and not passing her around after.
I love the part of RAW where Jeff Hardy takes out both Cade and Murdoch with a mighty leap of his 190 lbs body from the ring. I swear, Jeff Hardy's punches are so limp they need Enzyte.
Pimpin' In High Places
Hey, read some of this shit, it took most of us days upon days to write it. Or at least copy and paste it.:
The 1st Ever 411 Indy Draft took place over the course of a week. PWG was represented by myself and a crack staff of talent scouts. Oh yeah, they scout crack 24/7, rock on. Btw, how'd I do so far?
Ask 411 answers the question: Why don't we have more PWG coverage on 411? Good question, the answer is...why don't you read my f*ckin' "Live Reports"?? Man, I take time out of my busy porn surfing schedule and no one ever notices. *sniff sniff*
El hijo de Adam discusses who is truly Ichiban in Destiny. My guess is HUSTLE. But I'm not on their payroll like Larry is.
J-Link is kickin' back with the great escape. Wrestling. Which is almost as good as the "Steak Escape". If we only had cheese fries...mmmm....cheese fries.
Shorty turned me on to the Jr Tag Tourney coming up. It features an odd pairing of Danielson and Davey Richards. Well not that odd, they're fellow Washingtonians. Wow...that word doesn't even need to be spell checked: Washingtonians. Fuck it, I don't even need to bother with a joke for this link now, that's impressive enough.
Csonka has your 4 R's for Slammiversary. Funny how that PPV sounds like you're celebrating the first time your girlfriend let you get on her. "Happy Slammiversary baby, I got you a gift from that first night...a bottle of Jaeger and an almost expired condom".
Esperate, Esperate, everyone listen..haha...to ME. Armando Alejandro Rrrrrrrodriguez takes a look at the supplemental draft in the newly minted "Caribbean Corner". Well 2 out of 10 ain't bad. Haha.
HH takes a good hard look at the stuff you didn't take a good hard look at. But, hey, I don't blame you, maybe you were busy...doing laundry...maybe some homework... or ... yeah, it was porn wasn't it?
CoH this week poo poos on many a new T-shirt this week. Ari apparently doesn't like a lot of cotton t-shirts. He says they just don't "move with him" he likes his shirts, light, breezy, and mesh.
Minotti 2 Hotty discusses the odds of Cena dropping his title Sunday. I say anyone has a fair chance at beating him, except Foley, and Booker, and probably Lashley, and Orton doesn't look too promising...uh...who's ref'ing?
Sammy features the Briscoes...AGAIN, only this time the good ol' boys go up against the Irish Airborne. In a drinking contest? Perhaps, I think that's the only way the Irish guys stand a chance. Or maybe in a "how many teeth do we collectively have" contest.
** Don't forget about the rest of the Thursday crew: Weyer, Halden, Berman, and I guess....Small. I kinda consider him the Disco Inferno of the Thursday WolfPac. Which makes Slimmer Alex Wright by association. Suck on that Wunderkind.
Man, looking for a new job sucks. Hopefully I won't have to relocate, although I do have an in on a very promising prospect back down in San Diego. That's only a hop, skip, and a jump away from watching Ron Killings and Konnan again...oh and the donkey show. Speaking of which it is officially here, the 2007 LA Eroticon, aka Sexpo is happening downtown. Or so I heard. From some...uh...Jehovah's Witnesses or something. I dunno...maybe I should, uh, check it out...you know, to witness some Jehovahs...or what not. Eh...
