Hidden Highlights 07.30.07: Issue #100 (Part 1 of 2)

Hidden Highlights
By JP Prag and James “JT” Thomlison

Issue #100 (Part 1 of 2)

Intro

Yo yo yo yo, it’s Cryme Ty—

JT: Don’t even joke about that! You know what happened last time!!

JP: Sorry, I just could not resist the setup!

Hello everyone celebrating this milestone in Hidden Highlights history (in more ways than you know), and welcome to the 100th Issue (Not-so) Spectacular of Hidden Highlights!!

There are very few positive things on the Internet. It’s more about everyone’s negative view of what everyone else is trying to do.
— Eric Bischoff, Controversy Creates Ca$h

Hidden Highlight (n) – a small, hardly noticeable point that makes a big, positive difference. This could be anything from a wrestler putting extra emphasis into his moves to make it believable to a person in the background reacting while not the focus to the cameraman shaking the picture to create an effect. There are just so many unsung heroes of wrestling that it is impossible to cover them all.

For the past 100 weeks, we have taken the top 3 Hidden Highlights from the biggest shows on television (RAW, ECW of SciFi, iMPACT, SmackDown!, and a PPV or television special if there is one). Plus we have turned to you, the readers, to let us know all the Hidden Highlights you saw this, last, or any week in history. On top of all that, we have explored other issues that prove why this has, and always will be, the most positive article in the IWC.

And who has this dynamic we been, you ask?

Why none other than JP Prag and James “JT” Thomlison, of course!

We have always brought you Hidden Highlights with one goal in mind: to appreciate all those little things that make a huge difference. JT?

JT: 100! Wow, I can’t believe it’s finally here! Now JP if you could kindly point me in the direction of the wet bar, I’ll be over there “celebrating”.

JP: It’s right there behind Larry and Cook, though I’m not sure how they got there since, you know, they weren’t invited.

Larry: I do as I please, minion.

Cook: Yeah, minion!

JP: Cook, shouldn’t you be going insane again from trying to answer too many Ask411 questions?

Cook: Whose to say I’m not insane… WITH POWER!!

JP: Yeah, what I thought.

JT: Hey, don’t we have an issue to do here, with some surprises?!?!

JP: Well, let’s save all the surprises for later in this issue. In the meantime, we can get on with the Hidden Highlights!

Hidden Highlights for WWE RAW, SmackDown!, and ECW present the Great American Bash: Sunday, July 22, 2007 by the JT

JT: Hardy again fails to win a U.S. Championship as MVP gets by him, Hornswaggle wins the cruiserweight title, Carlito gets by Sandman, Candice retains her women’s title against Melina, WrestleMania 24!, Umaga beats Jeff hardy up a bit, John Morrison also retains, Orton kills another legend (Rhodes), Khali keeps it up, and John Cena rounds out the “not a single belt switched hands” PPV! And how about the ropes! Also, I think that is the first time that I have ever heard Michael Cole mention his wife on the air, and she’s Latina! AND how about Lillian? So good to see her back full-time and that outfit was not only fitting, but smokin’! (no pictures; as I went back for them on Monday night after I’d written this, I came to the stunning realization that while I did watch this, I didn’t record it on DVR. Lovely. I have it on DVD, but the method of picture retrieving is on the DVR, not the DVD recorder/player.)

(3) Girl talk!:

As we all saw (and as I mentioned earlier), Lillian Garcia was in the house and looking GOOD. She was in the ring to announce the Woman’s Championship match, and then she announced the champ. Candice Michelle came down to the ring, and she happened to be going up the same stairs to enter the ring that Lillian was coming down to exit it. Instead of being un-social, the women stopped for a second as Lillian said something to her! Could have been “Good luck”, or “Hey, how are you?”. Whatever the matter, I doubt you would see this interaction between Lillian and a male wrestler on a simple passing. The women have to stick together! I mean, after all, besides being women, they are both faces, who are always chummy with one another!

(2) One leg up on the competition:

After MVP Superplexed Matt Hardy, he naturally went for the immediately pin. He used his arms to hook one leg, but then also hooked his other leg around Hardy’s right leg in an attempt to completely immobilize him! This really was such a great move by MVP, as he continues to improve. To be completely honest, I am fairly certain that at some point in the 100 issues, I have given someone else credit for doing this. To me though, it’s such a rare sigh in wrestling that I see no reason why I shouldn’t point it out. Rare = Hidden. Enjoy MVP people, he is (it seems) going to be great. (and then of course, I would call it rare and I believe Kennedy then did the exact same thing the next night. Go figure!)

(1) DAMN!:

After said women’s match, Candice Michelle came to the back at the same time that Matt Hardy was giving his brother Jeff a pep talk. They turned their attention towards her, and the show was on. Water being poured over a hot body + guys googling her oddly = normal man stuff. Good times. But then, as it was coming to a close, Ron Simmons came in from his patented “DAMN”. Usually though, he just stares or looks at whatever is going on. It was no different here, expect that for the first time since the return of Ron Simmons and the “DAMN”, his bottom lip was actually quivering! It was like he couldn’t get it out because he was so mesmerized! I was literally chuckling out loud at this. Such – and this will sound weird – great control over the lip movement by Ron here to add some emphasis to the situation. Quivering lip! DAMN!

JP: As an acting exercise, we used to wear masks that had no “emotion” written on the face and then are told, without words, to convey certain emotions. It is so hard to tell a story when you don’t have your face to work with, much harder than having no lines. Ron Simmons tells so much with just his face and one word that it has to be applauded. What happened with him and Teddy Long and SmackDown! was a great example of that!

Hidden Highlights for WWE RAW: Monday, July 23, 2007 by JP

JP: The more I see Cody Rhodes, the more I want all of the Harts, Ted DiBiase Jr., and David Flair to find their way onto television. The problem is, do you build up the new generation slowly over time, or do you do what is automatically thought and have them battle out their legacies. To get this answer, I look back at the Funks, Briscos, Von Erichs, Andersons (all fake, but nonetheless), and the rest and the answer is simple: legacy means something. Let’s do something with it!

(3) It’s me… it’s me… it’s… JP!:

I wish I could take credit for this one, and I may have spotted it myself first, but my friend Jay (who was watching RAW live) called me up to tell me this one. Right after the opening credits, the camera began to pan over the crowd and show the signs per usual. But not three seconds in and we landed on a sign that said—you guessed it—JP!

Of course, this was not the first time we’ve seen this sign. It showed up on SmackDown! just a few weeks back as well. While I appreciate the sentiment guys, there’s only one sign I want to see on TV:

(2) Love bite:

For our divas action of the night, Melina and Beth Phoenix (I’m so glad she gets to keep her last name) took on Mickie James and Maria. As Maria made her way to the ring, she was accompanied by everyone’s favorite… errr… fake Italian guy from New Jersey who used to impersonate a Russian: Santino Marella. On a side note, the reason I could never take Santino seriously as just some novice or some innocent guy is because he has giant tattoos all over his body. If you want someone to look “fresh” and “inexperienced”, then they need a much cleaner skin surface.

Anyway, as Maria and Santino came to the ring, Maria climbed up the ring steps and Santino gave her a kiss on the hand. But Santino did not just give some little peck; oh no. Instead he gave her a little bite on her hand as well. That’s vivacious!

(1) I need some support here:

Later in the evening, the Sandman and Jim Duggan teamed up to take on Carlito and William Regal. After taking some beatings to his back, Carlito was able to hit the Back Stabber on Duggan for the victory. As the team was walking away up the entrance area (no ramp this week), Carlito was holding his back with his right hand and arm. The referee then came over to raise Carlito’s right hand in victory, but Carlito would not let go because of the pain. Instead, he put his left hand and arm into place and ONLY THEN let the ref take away his right hand. That was quick thinking by Carlito and surefire realism. Kudos to Carlito for showing why he is so beloved in these pages.

JT: HAHAHA that was such a Regal face, too! And how about that Cody Rhodes? If he can get some meat on those bones, and they allow him to develop, he could be a superstar down the road. I suspect this column will be seeing him in the future!

Hidden Highlights for ECW on SciFi: Tuesday, July 24, 2007 by JT

JT: John Morrison is a “fighting” champion, Stevie Richards gets a surprise win over Thorn, The Miz gets a win and then a reward from the Expose, Big Daddy V takes out TWO foes, and CM Punk gets a pin over Elijah Burke to get a win for his team (Dreamer)!

(3) When you weight 900 pounds, you can…:

I was very impressed by something tonight that I saw from Big Daddy V. After he finished destroying Jimmy Cruise and Victor Caldeo, he went down for the pin. I noticed as he was sprawled across both men that he was actually holding down Victor’s right leg! Hey, why bother even attempting to hook it if you are strong and big enough to hold it down through sheer physical strength? A very smart use of his power, not that surprising to me when you consider he is a student of Matt Striker!

(2) X’s and O’s:

Speaking of Matt Striker, as you were watching Big Daddy V make his way to the ring, you may have been doing everything in your power to avert your eyes. They pay me the big bucks though, so I suffer for you. If you were able to stick it through though, you may have noticed Matt Striker walking beside/behind him. And what he was holding and then what he folded up was a pointer! The same kind of pointer you would use if you were – say – just in a locker room going over your game plan on – oh, I don’t know – a chalkboard! Man Striker ALWAYS has the best and most appropriate props. I always miss talking about him!

(1) Credible champ, credible chaser:

I have to say that I liked the booking of the main event; more importantly, the booking of John Morrison in said main event. First, he agrees to get into the ring to start the match when Punk calls for him. Granted, he then took advantage of a cheap shot by Burke, but hey, he is still a heel. Then he got in some good offense throughout the match while also being able to display his athleticism at times (how about that one “hop-through-the-rope-thing” avoidance of Dreamer?). Then, he lost the match, but was not the one pinned. See, to me this is exactly how you would book a match that allows the champion to look credible, and the challenger look strong (Punk did get the pin after all). They don’t want people thinking that Morrison is some dodging bitch who is scared of other people. They want them to think that he is a legitimate world champion (and also that Punk is a legitimate challenger to the title).

JP: I like how Tazz pointed out that Morrison changed his clothes for the main event because that’s the type of guy he is. He keeps a whole plethora of outfits with him for any occasion!

Hidden Highlights for TNA iMPACT: Thursday, July 26, 2007 by JP

JP: I just want you to know that for the first time ever in TNA, Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin were called the Murder City Machine Guns. I know, you are used to hearing it because the TNA recappers, news writers, and people like us call them that. But now it is official, so therefore less smarky. Of course, this is one of those rare examples when you can say the internet influenced a major wrestling company to make a change. Yes, I know that was the name the two came up with in ROH, but that means nothing to TNA. Give yourself a pat on the back for helping make that happen.

JT: Um. Actually brother, it was Motor City Machine Guns, not Murder. A reader mentions it later, and I have confirmed on TNAwrestling.com.

JP: Really? Oh well, it’s still obviously taken directly from that so everything I said still applies, you annoying fact checker you! Of course, you could have just edited my words for me and saved the embarrassment, but why do that?

(3) We have a winner:

As the main event match of AJ Styles vs. Abyss got under way, Mike Tenay continually said that the match was no DQ and that there must be a winner. Then, as the match got much further along, there were about half a dozen run ins and people were everywhere. As we have seen often in the past, a lot of time when this happens the show just ends with the assumption that the match is over, which always bothers me. But not this time! Even after the entire beat down and bleeding, AJ Styles remembered to grab the referee and pin Abyss right in the middle of the ring. I was so pleasantly surprised that the match had an ending that I just had to note it here. Sure, it wasn’t very hidden, but it was different in a very good way.

(2) On the lookout:

During the opening segment of the show, Christian Cage arrived with the entire Coalition and his own personal security force (Cage Security). More often than not when we see these stand-in rent-a-cops, they stand around in the background until someone jumps them, and then they start waving to get it to stop. But while I was watching this crew, I noticed something very interesting: they were all looking around! These people actually played the role of security (albeit over the top) by continually checking out what was going on around them and checking in on their headsets! Excellent job by the extras, I’m proud of you.

(1) Goliath with a slingshot:

Before I get too far into this segment, I highly recommend you read “God Knows” by Joseph Heller. It’s the story of King David told in Catch-22 style. If you don’t know who King David was or Catch-22 is, I recommend reading a Wikipadia article on him first and then reading “Catch-22” by Joseph Heller first. After you do that, read the title to this and you’ll laugh a little more.

JT: It’s also a movie. Although the movie is really not anything like the book.

JP: …you’ve read Catch-22?

JT: What am I, illiterate over here? Yes I’ve read Catch-22, does that surprise you?

JP: Actually, it does a little.

JT: Well thank you for your un-blinding faith in my relationship with American literature.

JP: No need to get all sensitive about it, Nancy; thinking war just didn’t seem like one of your interests. Now if I may continue:

In our only non-No-DQ match of the evening, the aforementioned Murder Motor City Machine Guns took on LAX. Early into the match, Hernandez got his hands on someone’s t-shirt. Now normally someone would use a t-shirt to choke his opponent in blatant cheating fun. This time, though, Hernandez wrapped the shirt around Shelley’ throat and used it as sling shot to send him across the ring. It was so quick that the ref did not even catch it! Very nice thinking by Hernandez to throw in a little extra pain while not getting caught in the process. Also, for finding something to do with all those cut up t-shirts in the future.

JT: I also like the security team one. If you notice in the particular shot that I chose to use, not only is the guy behind his right shoulder scoping things out, he appears to be getting a message in his ear – possibly from more of the security team in a different part of the arena? (actually that particular guy was QUITE animated the whole time) Good stuff.

Hidden Highlights for WWE SmackDown!: Friday, July 27, 2007 by JT

JT: Dave has a little fun beating up Deuce and flirting with his girlfriend, Hornswoggle successfully defends his cruiserweight title for the first time, Rey will be back, Chavo doesn’t like Eugene, Flair and Matt Hardy have a woo off on their way to winning a match against MVP and Masters, Mark Henry kills bitches, Ron Simmons makes a rare appearance on SmackDown to become Teddy Long’s best man, and Big Dave interrupts Khali’s big celebration!

(3) He’s not gellin’:

I was watching the Eugene vs. Chavo match, really studying Eugene’s outfit to see if I could spot anything I hadn’t noticed before because it’s so animated. I was drawn to his boots again (I know, covered the green stuff before) for some reason but because I couldn’t get a good look at them I couldn’t tell what it was. But, the cameraman decided to bless me for about a second and a half, and I was able to figure out that for some reason, the first few laces (from the toe up) were actually red, and then the rest of them are white! Keep in mind, this is only on the one shoe. I don’t know if it’s a multicolored shoelace, or if two of them are tied together or what the deal is, but it just figures he would have something else wrong about his outfit (yet so right in this case). There’s a bit more I have to say about Eugene, but a reader mentions him and that is where I got into it so you’ll just have to wait for that!

(2) He said NO!:

And then thirty seconds later I got the next one! Figured I might as well try and give the ref some love in issue #100, as they have been a big part of this column over the last couple of years (Didn’t catch his name this time so he’ll just have to be ref). Chavo had Eugene pinned in the middle of the ring in a leg lock, and the ref asked Eugene if he wanted to quit. He said no, and then the ref actually sat up, looked at the bell table, crossed / moved his arms (like an ump would call safe), and yelled at them “He said no!”. He then asked him again, again Eugene said no, and the ref AGAIN gave the safe signal and yelled NO! I honestly can’t say I can recall a ref blatantly addressing the bell corner in said matters (obviously he would if someone gives, but I don’t think I’ve seen it when they say no). Guess it’s just another rule being implemented to make the matches seem more legit.

(1) I can see you!:

How fitting. On my final Issue #100 Hidden Highlight ever, I’m going with MVP – a HH beast! After a wicked boot to the skull of Ric Flair, Flair gave us the classic flop, and MVP went for the pin. There are two things I like about this particular pin. For one, he pinned him with his back against Flair so that he could make sure he kept an eye on Hardy!

Then, when he realized Hardy was coming, he actually broke the pin attempt himself in order to prevent Hardy from hitting him! Why don’t wrestlers ever do this? They always lay there and take the hit from the partner who is breaking up the pin. This is silly! Why take an extra hit!? If you know he’s coming, and you know you aren’t getting the 3 count, why not break it yourself and try to prevent being assault? Makes sense to me! Like I said, MVP is a HH beast.

JP: I would like to do a comparison test to see how many of same people we mentioned in Issue #1 are being mentioned here. I’m pretty sure Carlito was there, so that’s a start!

Hidden Highlights for Hogan Knows Best: Sunday, July 22, 2007 by JP

JP: Hogan Knows Best returned for a fourth season, this time with marital problems! Uh-oh! Maybe Vince should take more booking advice from Hulk, this stuff is gold! Also, I completely agree with Hulk, Linda does look better when she isn’t trying to doll up and wear a ton of makeup. Maybe she isn’t in the mood because she’s too busy trying to look good for the camera and doesn’t want to smear her makeup or spill grape juice on the couch (see: American Beauty).

(3) Same old:

I was surprised to see that the intro for Season 4 was completely the same as the intro for Season 3. I thought they would mix up the graphics to show the changes to the characters, but I guess not. Oh well, sometimes you have to stick with the good stuff!

(2) Take out eggs:

For Linda’s wish day, the first thing she asked Hulk for was breakfast in bed. Hulk then went downstairs to find some container of food. Did you catch what was in there? Yeah, eggs, bagels, toast, and bacon. Come on people, that stuff is not hard to cook! And later in the episode when the family was together for dinner they were eating more white Styrofoam containers. I thought this was odd because we have seen so much cooking from Linda and Hulk in the past. Their refrigerator used to be filled with fresh meat, cheeses, and eggs. But that quick peak into the fridge revealed nothing but takeout. Looks like living in Miami has changed their lifestyle a lot so they aren’t even cooking anymore. And take this from a guy who lives on the road and always has to go out to eat: you need to cook at home when you can because on the road food is no good!

(1) Leaving again?:

After Linda returned home from driving around complaining about Hulk, she came upstairs to argue. There, she told Hulk she could pack all her clothes up and be gone in two seconds. Hulk then asked here if she was going to leave “AGAIN”?! Again?! So, it looks like Linda has walked out at least once before. Hmmm… I believe there was a missing chapter from Hulk’s book.

Oh, who are we kidding? I didn’t read Hulk’s book!

JT: I’m actually a little puzzled by where they appear to be going with this season. I mean, if having cameras around all the time and having a reality TV show was one of the things contributing to the problems in my marriage, I would be like “okay, time for you guys to leave, I need to handle this real business and make this marriage work”. Yet, instead they are like “oh, let’s let the whole world watch!”. Normally, I would chalk this up to “well, they signed a contract”, but if you all recall, they did not have a new contract when all of this started; they had to be “talked into” it by vh1 to sign for season 4 while this was all going on. Maybe the paycheck they offered was simply too much to pass up.

Reader Write-in Hidden Highlights

Hidden Highlights aren’t just for us to find and tell you about, but for you to spot and share with us. Don’t just sit there and stare, but be a more active, attentive, and engaged viewer. Appreciate all the hard work that goes into making the wrestling we have the privilege to watch and then let us know what you caught this and every week.

This week JT gets to pick our Reader Write-in Hidden Highlights of the week.

JT: The readers were out in full force this week! So, *GENERAL WARNING*:: some parts of the following Reader Write-in Hidden Highlights may be edited for grammar, spelling, and English translation…

Starting us off this week is Adam S. (from Vegas), who has kept his love for Hidden Highlights bottled up long enough! I’m putting him here first because he talks about several shows and I didn’t want to stop his roll by breaking up his email across this section.

Hey guys. I’ve been a fan forever, finally had to write in with a few highlights and some comments. I’ll go ahead and suck up first. You guys rock. Since I started reading the article, the term hidden highlight has actually become part of my vocabulary. Keep on keepin’ on, because you’re doing a fantastic job. If I might ask, is there any way you guys could do five per show instead of three? I know you probably get this question sometimes, but I just want more HH goodness in my week. Now, some stuff I caught.

JT: As you all know, I usually try to leave this sort of stuff out. It distracts from the Highlights and makes us come off as if we’re in love with ourselves. That being said, under the circumstances we will reveal shortly, I will go ahead and bask in the love this week! Also Adam, you’ll have to ask JP about the five HH’s for each show. JP?

JP: I considered it at the beginning while formulating the article, but thought it would make a single issue too long. As time has gone on, I’ve liked the three Hidden Highlight format because it forces us to peer down and write the best. Besides, over the past 100 issues Readers (like you) have picked up so many that a show could have 20 Hidden Highlights all together in an issue. For a while I toyed with the idea of interlacing the readers and us into each section, but it didn’t come off looking very neat or reading coherently. Thanks for the faith that we could pull off five every week for one hour shows like ECW, but the three Hidden Highlights is enough to leave you wanting more, and that’s the way I like it. Now back to your own regularly scheduled Reader Write-In Hidden Highlight!

On Raw

-The only people to vote for Bobby Lashley were the two most over guys on the panel. Foley and Batista. Also, two of the three that had fought both (the 3rd being JBL). The highlight here is that everyone gives Cena more credit than he himself does. He never once said he was going to beat Lashley. Just that he was going to put his best into it.

JT: Cena has – at least since dropping the rapper gimmick and becoming SuperCena – always had a very “I’m-humble-as-hell-but-right-in-your-face-and-I-will-bring-it” attitude, and he displayed the same with Lashley.

-Cody Rhodes, right off the bat. Ready to face Orton, young Cody pointed out that Randy couldn’t concuss his father’s legacy. A perfect statement for continuity, which I know you guys love, with all the concussions Orton’s caused.

JT: Excellent point! I myself didn’t even make that connection, but it indeed makes perfect sense and helps sell the injuries to RVD and HBK.

On Impact, there were a few things.

-The semi-hidden highlight was Kurt Angle himself. He seemed completely oblivious to the fact that he was walking around in a speedo, and was only embarrassed when Cornette forced him to wear a robe. Kudos to JB for the bit about not wearing underwear. That was a laugh out loud moment, when even a heel Kurt dropped for a moment and appreciated the freeballin’.

JT: JP gave this a ton of love last week, and you are right in continuing to do so this week. Angle was hilarious.

-When the Christian Coalition starts talking to Robert Roode, AJ, being form the south, is the only one who understood James Storm.

JT: I found that hilarious as well, and then they’re all standing there giving AJ a look like “dude, how in the HELL did you understand that?”

-In addition to that, the entire Tomko turn is one giant running set of hidden highlights. The man is awesome.

JT: Couldn’t agree more. He is constantly doing something or saying something subtle or even just giving a look. More on Tomko later.

On Smackdown

-As MVP made his way down the ramp for the battle royal, Matt hardy never took his eyes off of him. When MVP went to the side of the ring, Matt hardy stepped backwards because Mark Henry blocked his view, and kept on watching MVP like a hawk. Brilliant.

JT: Matt Hardy has been on a roll. I believe I talked a bit about his veteranship recently, and he continues to prove my point for me. After all, this was his opponent from the GAB, and he had to make sure that MVP didn’t try and get a one up on him heading into the show.

-Later in the night, we see two short segments with MVP. During the Hardy match, he’s watching the TV, belt on his shoulder, but just a bit later, he’s got no ring gear, and the title is hung up. Then it hit me. He waited so he could scout Hardy, and THEN he took a shower and cleaned up from his match. Great continuity with the build they’ve given him.

JT: I like it, and that makes perfect sense. We’re always mentioning the scouting around here.

In the battle royal itself, there were several highlights, guys. It was ripe for the picking.

-Right from the get go, the high energy Jimmy Wang Yang starts swinging before the bell, then backs off when he realized it hasn’t started yet.

-Chris Masters went directly after JWY, which makes sense, as he just beat the little guy in a match.

-Kane went straight after Mark Henry. This is perfect, as Kane is just about always eliminated by the one or two guys bigger and stronger than him, so he went after one straight away.

-When Mark Henry and Khali started to face off, Kane and Batista broke it up. I didn’t get it at first until I realized that it was great strategy. First, it was hard enough to throw one over the top. If they tangled, there would be no way in hell to toss both. Secondly, if the other two big guns hooked up to fight, Batista and Kane would suddenly become prime targets for the other guys in the ring.

-Dave Taylor eliminated himself. He dove at Batista, but the Animal just happened to duck at that time, looking the other way entirely…and Taylor went flying. Great work by those two to time that so well.

JT: Good points all around! That was a fun little Battle Royal, and I mentioned a couple of things about it last week, but you took it to a whole new level! I especially like the Taylor/Dave timing one! Thanks for the email Adam! Trevor A. also touched on more than one show, so we will put him next!

During the Matt Hardy match there was a sign that said Amy loves Matt. I’m sure it was a fan that had the name Amy but I chuckled a little since Lita’s real name is Amy.

JT: I saw this sign, I made the connection, and it was - - close to making it as one of my three HH’s, so I wanted to make sure that it got mentioned here. Purely coincidental I’m sure, but funny none the less.

Photo courtesy of Robbie W., who also wrote in about it

The best announcer on smackdown (JBL) also seemed to really be tearing Michael Cole a bigger one than usual this week. They really need to replace Cole with someone who can hang with JBL because week after week it makes Cole look like an idiot.

JT: Agreed, but that is his job. Cole I think has actually done a very good job as JBL’s play-by-play guy. Styles and Grisham would get slaughtered, and it just wouldn’t come off right if he was saying the types of things he says to Cole to J.R. Tazz could probably hang, but then JBL would have to switch to play-by-play (which, by the way, he did in ANNOUNCING GOD LIKE FASHION at a prior event). Trevor moved on to Impact:

During the Kurt Angle Locker room speech Petey Williams was on the “heel” side of the locker room standing in front of Robert Rhoode.

JT: Pick a side Petey! Speaking of which, is it me or does it seem like I haven’t really seen him on TV except for background stuff in like years?

Tomko actually had the belt he won in Japan on TV with him and TNA makes absolutely no attempt trying the explain to the fans who don’t visit fantastic sites like 411 fail to mention why he had a championship belt with him.

JT: Tyson Tomko – Beast. The belt Trevor is referring to is actually the IWGP Tag Team titles from the New Japan Pro Wrestling fed. I guess he figured if Kurt Angle can do it, so can he!

JP: I kind of mentioned this last week, but here’s the thing. Tomko has the “real” IWGP Tag Team belt from New Japan, while Angle has the “fake” IWGP title from IGF. TNA’s relationship seems to be more with IGF than New Japan, so I’m assuming they’ll lean towards talking about that promotion. Also, Christian at the beginning of iMPACT this week said, “Come on Tomko, and take your stupid toy belt with you!” That was just priceless! It almost made the cut, but it fit in perfectly here! So, please continue…

When Christian is running from Abyss in the truck he actually jumps out of the windows and not out of the door

JT: This was awesome on Cage’s part. When you are running from a monster, you use the fastest and most effective method of escape, which in this case was the windows. Getting us into the Great American Bash this week is Mike P.:

Just watching the GAB PPV, and I caught something that JBL said that made me raise an eyebrow. During the tease for the triple-threat match for the World Heavyweight Championship, JBL pre-warned the wrestling purists that this match was going to be ‘monkey-butt ugly’. Now I know that good ol J.R. on numerous occasions has referred to matches as ‘bowling-shoe ugly’, so kudos to JBL for not treading on a J.R. signature call, or at the very least not using it outright.

JT: Hmmmmm…. What was I just saying about JBL… let me think…. Oh wait, now I remember:

ANNOUNCING GOD LIKE FASHION

Really I’m not sure what more to add to what Mike said. He spelled it out pretty clearly for you. JBL is awesome at what he does, plain and simple. More from the GAB from Steve S.:

Notice towards the end of the match with Lashley, right before he gets speared. The ref does the standard 5 count to Cena to break the hold, as he stumbles back the ref, says something to Cena, Cena replys “Sorry about the 5 count” then Lashley spears him. That’s why Cena is so money, He always fights fair, and never wants to actually hurt anyone.

JT: We love the ref/wrestler interaction around here, and this is another fine example of it. And you’re right, Cena does always have to be the boy scout. For the Kiddies! Sticking with the GAB, Ben S. emailed us, and made sure we were well aware of his copyright claims!:

Not really sure how hidden it was, but I have to give Uuuuuuuumaga some love for his match against his own personal jobber, Jeff Hardy. At the end of the match, after Jeff hit Umaga with just about everything imaginable, when Umaga finally got the advantage, the Samoan Bulldozer wasted no time at all in putting Hardy away with his 2 moves of Almost Certain Impending Unpleasantness (Catch-Phrase copyrighted to Ben Stickle, July 1998) {I think the word doom is over-used} anyway, after the he saw that Hardy was defenseless in the corner, he went only a few steps, didn’t showboat in the opposing corner, hit the buttalanche and immediately pulled Hardy out and hit the Samoan spike, with practically NO wasted motion. It was like he decided that he’d been hurt enough and was taking no more chances with Hardy, made it look like he still saw Jeff as a threat that needed to be out away immediately. Hope this qualifies, and I guess I’ll let you use my catch phrase, since you have such an awesome column….

JT: First off Ben we’re very flattered you have no issues with us printing your catch-phrase. Onto your highlight, I think you’re exactly right. Umaga realized he had been in that match a bit longer than usual, and Hardy had some success against him and decided it was time to end it. Makes him look like a beast while still – as you said – makes Hardy look like a threat, even if a small one. Speaking of the Hardys, we got another GAB email from Dave L.:

In both of the Hardy’s matches they were pushed into a turnbuckle before the end sequence of moves for their opponents, it was the same turnbuckle each time.

JT: More of an observation than a Highlight, but either way it was a good one. The funny thing here is that they were both probably calling a majority of each other’s respective matches; since they are so familiar with one another, it probably just worked out that way! Turning our attention to RAW this week is Chris McE.:

This is kind of a two-parter and both deal with Hacksaw Jim Duggan. When Dusty was being put in the ambulance you can see Hacksaw off to the side helping with the cart but he couldn’t really help because he had his 2X4 with him. Goes to show that even when some one is on their way to the hospital Hacksaw NEVER LEAVES HIS 2X4. The second one is when Dusty and Cody get into the ambulance the only to wrestlers out there to see them off is Hacksaw and Arn Anderson. I think that was great since they are the only two wrestler’s on the RAW roster who knew Dusty from back in the day and probably would be the closest to him due to them all being around the same age.

JT: Good call on both counts. It really seems like Hacksaw gets his giggles from walking around randomly in his wrestling gear and 2 X 4 because that is how he is ALWAYS dressed when I see him. Hacksaw, you can still say HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO in a shirt, mkay? Next we have Dan H., we is happy to be here with us this issue, and made sure to mention it 34 times to ensure he made the column! (its okay Dan, a lot of people are excited about it, including us, so we thank you):

100 Issues of Hidden Highlights and counting. Well I’ll just get to the point since I have more than I normally do. Hey it is your guys 100th so consider it an anniversary present. Damn it’s a lot I’m not saying I don’t like to write it’s just…oh never mind I’m blabbing on without a point.

JT: As I said Dan, it’s the big 100 and we’re flattered that people are taking notice. Glad you could be a part of it. Let’s get to your HH!

RAW (7-23)

At the top of the show King Bookah came out and asked for “Jerome” Lawler to come and join him in the ring so they could settle their dispute in a “Kingly” manner, Booker then said he had refreshments, while Bookah had a nice heaping pile of fruits, Jerry got a donut with a bite taken out of it. That just shows you Bookah knows how to treat other Kings with respect……….Or not.

JT: Yeah, the set up for that was beautiful. Gotta give love to the production crew or whichever writer came up with that. It was really over the top which is perfect for the King Book character.

You guys have talked about it prior to this but it looks as if the team of Beth Phoenix and Melina are legit, because they were both wearing Blue and Gold. This is just my opinion but is Mickie one of the best looking divas on Raw right now?

JT: You know JP loved that one!

JP: I did! Also, Mickie James looks so much better to me since she started wearing the tights instead of the skirts. Some women are just not skirt people, and she’s one of them.

Yeah, I had just thought about this but could Duggan’s USA chant have a double meaning, because in my High School they wouldn’t allow us to chant USA during sports because they thought it stood for “You suck a**!” I know it’s a random thought but I just had to get it in here.

JT: Very random, indeed.

I wish I had a screen capture of Todd Grisham’s face when Cena was talking about Candice then switched over to Brokeback Mountain And Umaga, it was “Priceless”.

JT: I am your friend:

Lastly for RAW, I noticed someone had another JP sign in the front row with an Arrow on it coincidence? That’s all I have because I wasn’t able to watch ECW and when I though Impact should be on it was UFC so yeah, just keep up the good work and lets hope you guys hit 1000 before the whole wrestling industry goes into the crapper.

JT: We have seen the JP guy before, and JP made it one of his Highlights this week, but always cool to mention it. 1000 columns? Who are we, Csonka!? Our one from ECW this week is from Jim McD., who is just a bit behind, but that’s okay.

I know I am a week late with this one, but it relates to the CM Punk – Elijah Burke match on July 17th. CM Punk took quite a beating from Burke the entire match, especially to his lower back. After Punk pulled out the win, he went over to celebrate up in the corner of the ring as he often does. But as he tried to get up on the turnbuckles, he winced in pain and grabbed his lower back and exited the ring. Great job of selling the pounding he took during the match!

JT: No need to be concerned with being late, Jim. Anytime we get a chance, we like to point out where someone sells something later in the match or post-match. There are many times that wrestlers forget about something that happened five minutes earlier; it’s always nice to see someone remembering that “oh yeah, I got punched in the face two minutes ago”. A note from Impact this week as Ian C. wanted to make sure everyone was on the up and up continuity wise!:

One of the reader write-ins mentioned XXX, and how they could never team again after losing the match against AMW. This is true, but what I LOVED about this is when the newly reformed team went on TNA Today, the web show, on the 19th, the day of Impact’s airing. The host is the HH beast Jeremy Borash, and his first question for the group is what many of us (myself included) wondered; that being “How is this happening?” Primetime then stepped up and explained that TNA had the nerve to release him, but with his new contract, there are no restrictions, and it was his choice to “get the band back together.” When I saw that, I was overjoyed. Not only did JB do his job and find out what we all wanted to know, but Primetime had the answer, explained it, and all is good continuity-wise. I guess. Not exactly hidden, but it’s good enough for me.

Here’s the link to the show if you wanted to see it for yourself: Linky

JT: And there you have it. I like that TNA chose to do this as opposed to just ignoring it and hoping that nobody would remember. I’m sure JP has also put away the brown paper bag he was ventilating into.

JP: Actually, I need a second to throw away my brown paper bag and split the article in two. Damn long articles!

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