News to Start Your Weekend 9.07.07

I picked a good week to take off, I think. Not much went on last week, so it would have just been a boring column full of filler. I wish something interesting would happen that would get people talking.

Although to be honest, I wish something related to wrestling would be interesting and get people talking. Something they write and is a storyline. And no, not the McMahon’s son thing. That’s a piece of garbage storyline. Including the Vince death angle, this has been going on since June 11 (that’s three months) and thus far hasn’t spawned a single wrestling match. Yet it’s THE major angle on RAW and takes time on both of the other shows as well with countless backstage segments and 20 minute in ring segments. Seriously. This angle is SUCH a piece of dog shit.

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i’m lead to believe there’s some news below

– Something happened with some old guy’s son apparently. A car accident or something. I think.

– Drugs and suspensions.

– Samoa Joe and Alex Shelley aren’t leaving TNA any time soon. Reports are that Joe’s contract has at least a year and a half left and that Shelley signed a two year deal recently as his current contract is about to be up. Wishful thinking on our parts I guess.

– Joe and Shelley are staying in TNA and Cryme Tyme are gone from WWE. There was some incident at a house show with them and Cade and Murdoch. Apparently Shad and JTG reacted very poorly to a rib and it wasn’t well received backstage.

– WWE also apparently really wants to get Chris Jericho back, and they’re possibly even desperate for him to return. They also apparently called Shawn Michaels up and asked him to return two months early, but he turned them down. There is a possibility that Jericho may return, because he is said to be very open to it, however there’s no semblance of a time table for his return. It could be next week and it could be in 6 months. Or more.

– Oh, Eugene got fired too. And Mike Bucci, too. Bucci has no interest in being in the wrestling business any more and is moving on to other things. Dinsmore will do whatever, I assume. Yeah, that’s my biting commentary on the situation. Riveting stuff, I know.

– And the recent transaction news keeps rolling in. I feel like I’m Randle or something. Matt Sydal has officially signed his WWE developmental contract and will likely report to OVW at the end of this month when his indy commitments are done. And Test is gone from TNA as soon as he arrived. And nobody with a brain gives a fuck.

– Jimmy Rave will make his TNA debut this Sunday on PPV. He’ll be teaming with Lance Hoyt in a 37 team tag gauntlet match. Hell of a way to make your debut. He’s sure to have a chance to stand out and impress in THAT situation.

– Ric Flair quit, and apparently gave his notice back on August 21. WWE has offered him a major program, though, if he would return. This is kind of an odd story, but I really don’t have much to add to it, so I won’t bother trying.

– I read a headline on our news page and missed the comma. I thought it said Benoit killed the family doctor. That seemed highly unlikely considering the circumstances.

– WWE is doing a new thing with Microsoft for videos on their website. I looked at a preview, and all it is is a very small video box (that you can’t make bigger) with the video playing behind it kind of translucent or whatnot. It’s kind of cool, but too small to really be anything special.

– Rumor is that Punk will lose the title back to Morrison when he returns. Great idea. I’m completely against the idea of giving a guy a title in order to help him get over. A five pound piece of metal and leather doesn’t get a guy over. Sorry. Can anybody send me an email and explain to me why people think it makes sense that giving a guy a title will get him over? Please.

– TNA claims that they have a big announcement to make at their PPV this Sunday. They also sent word out a short while back that a former World Champion is on his way to TNA. Will the announcement be the extra hour for Impact that I believe is official at this point or will it be news of a new wrestler coming in? Will it be both? Will any of it really mean anything in the end?

– London and Kendrick beat Cade and Murdoch for the tag titles in South Africa. It is yet to be seen if they will take the belts to TV and have a recognized title reign.

– Dan Rodimer’s release is because he sucks. The plan apparently was to bring him up as a bodyguard for Edge and Orton, but then it turned out he wasn’t ready. The guy was supposed to be groomed to be a big star, and even filled in for Orton a couple times in main events of house shows against John Cena. He never got called up to the main roster though because even though he was in developmental for 47 years, he basically didn’t show any improvement. Rodimer actually asked for his own release because they kept him in development for so long. I’m sure WWE really missed out on the future of the business.

– Bobcore retired. It’s just as sad as losing Rodimer.

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ring of honor newsies

– Misawa is coming to ROH. On November 2 in Philly, he will team with KENTA to take on Marufuji and Morishima. It has not been announced what match he will be wrestling the next night in NYC.

– The Vulture Squad has been formed, and it is comprised of Jack Evans, Julius Smokes, Ruckus and a member to be revealed on October 5 in Boston. That night, Evans and Ruckus will team with the newest member of the Vulture Squad to take on the No Remorse Corps in a six man tag team match.

– Mike Quackenbush WILL be able to do one more date for ROH in 2007, which is awesome, because a couple weeks ago we thought that his first NYC show would be his last in 2007, but he will appear on the November 2 show in Philly, the first night of Glory By Honor VI weekend.

– The Resilience and the No Remorse Corps will battle on the night of ROH’s third PPV taping. Next Saturday night in Chicago, all three members of both groups will be in singles competition. The members of each group will individually face each other, but the match ups will not be announced until the night of the show.

– Adam Pearce, BJ Whitmer, Brent Albright and Friar Hagadorn are three and a quarter men who comprise the newest faction in Ring of Honor. What are their intentions and what is their common bond? They already have gone after Delirious, who seems to be a prime target for many groups, and they took out Pelle Primeau, who won’t be seen in Ring of Honor any time in the foreseeable future. Delirious will look for some measure of revenge on October 5 in Boston when he takes on BJ Whitmer in one-on-one competition. With the Resilience busy with two other groups right now and having their leader, Austin Aries, back in action, Delirious won’t have them to help fight his battles. Will anybody be able to come to his aid if Whitmer’s new cohorts get involved in Boston?

– The YRR (The Young, Rich and Ready For Action), a team from FIP comprised of Kenny King, Chasyn Rance, Steve Madison and Sal Rinauro will be making their debuts on the 9/14 and 9/15 shows in Detroit and Chicago. Only Rinauro, a former ROH Tag Team Champion, has wrestled in Ring of Honor.

– It looks like Project 161 may be coming after the Briscoes, although they are convinced that it is the doing of Kevin Steen. Does Steen have something to do with 161?

– Speaking of them, the first ever Ladder Match in Ring of Honor history will take place as the main event of the third PPV taping on September 15 in Chicago, where the Briscoes will defend their tag titles against Steen and Generico. Jay and Mark will be fighting to regain their belts from the possession of their nemeses, who stole the belts from the Briscoes on August 25 at the Manhattan Center after the 2/3 falls match. Steen forced Generico to help him attack the Briscoes with a ladder and then gave Generico one of the tag belts and made him leave.

– Bryan Danielson, who broke his orbital bone and hurt his retina in his title challenge against Morishima on 8/25, has been healing very well and no longer has to wear his eye patch 24 hours a day.

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whatever else before i go

– Four different people got my Seinfeld reference from my last column two weeks ago. Thank you Rene Boulet, Andrew Clark, Frank Baldwin and McJuar. And I disagree, McJuar. I think you just may be queer.

– Punk won the ECW Title this week in a really fantastic match. The atmosphere was so perfect, and everything went perfectly well. It actually felt like something important was happening, which is the first thing in a very long time that felt special in WWE. Here’s something for you people to email me about. What was the last thing that happened in WWE that you thought felt special or important? It could be a title change, a match, anything. Tell me what it is and why, could ya?

– Remember how much I HAAAAAAAAAATED the Orton/Cena build, well, complete lack thereof, leading into SummerSlam? It was barely a feud, and was unbelievably poorly done. I’m completely turned around on it right now. I’m just making believe that their feud began at SNME, because since then, everything has been complete gold. Two weeks ago when RAW ended with Orton kicking Papa Cena’s head in, it was great. RAW sucked, but that part of the show was really awesome.

– They really should have taken advantage of Carlito’s hair and made him lose it in a hair v. hair match if he was going to cut it. Somebody said on a message board that the reason he cut it was because Cade and Murdoch played a rib on him. They put gum on the bottoms of their boots and stomped his hair at a house show. Yeah, chances are very low that it’s true, but whoever came up with it is a good person who makes me very happy. As far as I’m concerned, that’s what happened.

– Beth Phoenix rules.

QUICK ‘N DIRTY~!

Angle, Angle, Angle/Sting, Joe, Rhino, Kaz, Harris, LAX

I don’t really think LAX will win, but the only two teams I want to win are them and the MCMG, and everybody knows they won’t book Shelley and Sabin to win anything. But really, I don’t give even a third of a shit about any of TNA’s belts as long as Kurt has all or any of them. It’s a real shame, too, because until they brought Kurt’s wife in, he had finally become an interesting and entertaining character for the first time in almost 2 years, at least. But now he’s just an annoying comedy character who happens to have all of the gold.

SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYA