The MeeThinks Friday FreeThinks: 12.07.07

Posted by John Meehan on 12.07.2007

Shoots and Ladders Into Glass Ceilings - Yup, It's Another Week of Pro Wrestling DRAMA!



Welcome back, all. Tons of news from all corners of the 'rasslin world this week (especially out of Orlando... where a certain intrawebz wrestling columnist may or may not just so happen to be headed next Thursday morning!)... so I'll spare you any longwinded introductions and get straight to the news. Sound like a plan?

Rock & roll.



WWE Visits U.S. Troops Abroad
Third Annual Tribute Show to Broadcast on Christmas Eve

In a truly "good" bit of news sure to warm and inspire even the most jaded of 'rasslin fans' hearts, World Wrestling Entertainment superstars left the United States this week for their third annual "Tribute to the Troops" holiday trip to enterain men and women serving in U.S. armed forces in Afghanistan and Iraq. Though it's obviously something of a "sad" note to point out that this trip marks the third year in a row that American soldiers have been stationed in war-torn areas across the globe, this charity show has been tremendously successful and appreciated in the past -- and there's no reason to believe that this year's installment should be any different.

Say what you will about Vince McMahon, his politics, his drug policies, his business ethics (or lack thereof), and maybe even his personal decisions in life regarding taste, tact and Lord knows what else... but the bottom line is that for *whatever* reason this show is put on each year (and MeeThinks there really is a great deal of honest-to-goodness, politic-free "tribute" at play with this yearly tour), it is -- without question -- an uncategorically GOOD thing, both for the WWE superstars and (most importantly) the audiences of men and women serving in the U.S. armed forces abroad which these superstars travel to entertain.

Face it, folks --

Sure, inevitably there is a due degree of public relations savvy and good business karma to be gained from making an annual benefit trip abroad, but when Chris Benoit killed his family and took his own life this summer, I'll bet you anything that your average Joe WWE employee and executive didn't turn around and say "boy, I can't wait to go over to Iraq... THAT'LL get the media off of our backs!"

WWE doesn't trot out this show as their "ace in the hole" to appease the media, nor to they bank on it as a yearly standby to pad out their holiday bonuses. Does it win them (brief) immunity from the media microscope, at least for a few days a year? Maybe -- but then again, with the mainstream media outlets more concerned with making John Cena out to be a steroid-fueled smartass than they are in reporting "good news" from the front lines of U.S. military conflicts overseas... perhaps not nearly as much as you'd think.

All in all?

It is GREAT to see WWE "giving back" by providing free shows to servicemen and women in war zones overseas, and MeeThinks it is an absolute credit to all parties involved that this annual tradition has continued to remain such an important and resounding success.





Samoa Joe "Shoot" Causes Backstage Fracas
Kevin Nash Takes Issue with Joe's Comments About "Padded Pensions"

Word 'round the webz this week is that TNA managed to create themselves a fair bit of nonsense following Sunday's Turning Point PPV. In case you've missed this story, here's ten quick steps to catch you up on the long and short of it (with fancy pictures to book!):

1) Scott Hall was booked to headline the PPV alongside Kevin Nash and Samoa Joe.
2) Scott Hall (notoriously unreliable) never actually signed a TNA contract.
3) Scott Hall no-showed the PPV, calling in sick on the day of the show and citing "food poisoning."
4) Somebody backstage (Russo?) sent Joe out on PPV to explain the situation.
5) Joe was told to bury Hall and put over the guys who actually wanna' work.
6) Joe did so, but pissed of Kevin Nash in the process, like so:

7) Nash thought Joe crossed the line by lumping him (and others) in with Hall... and so he let him know on live TV like so:



8) When the cameras went off, the two got into it backstage.
9) Shouting turned to shoving (as usual), and Joe walked away to avoid further conflict.
10) TNA management stepped in, and had a "team meeting" with the whole roster (more on that one in the Senshi news item below).

Alrighty then, so where does this leave us?

MeeThinks any reasonable fan of TNA and professional wrestling should have absolutely zero problem with what Joe said or how he said it. Bottom line (as MANY fans and critics of TNA alike have been saying FOR MONTHS) is that TNA has developed a nasty habit of bringing in "superstars" (read: imports from other companies) and pushing them to the immediate forefront of their shows and PPVs, often at the expense of homegrown TNA talent:

Team 3D, Christian Cage, Kurt Angle, Sting, Test, Rikishi, Booker T, Scott Hall...

Though many of these guys have been total "company men" upon arriving in TNA, the bottom line is that just about all of them have been brought in less than three months removed from their last appearance for a rival organization (usually WWE). And when each of 'em has landed in the main event picture/ World Title hunt within mere weeks of signing with the company, you simply can't help but feel at least a *bit* of sympathy for the rest of the longer-tenured TNA'ers (think Bobby Roode, Kaz, Christopher Daniels, AJ Styles, Petey Williams, etc.) who've pretty much seen their respective shots at the top of the card absolutely squashed the moment a new "WWE-ject" walks through the TNA doors.

As such?

I've got no gripes with Joe saying what he said on the PPV. He's absolutely right, and there are PLENTY of guys who've been with TNA for years (some even since day one) who've rarely or NEVER gotten a chance to "carry the ball" for the company, as they often find themselves passed over for a PPV payday by the latest guy to recieve a pink slip from World Wrestling Entertainment.

As far as Nash taking offense?

I can't fault the guy for trying to distance himself from Hall (especially since the guy was probably brought in by virtue of a well-placed "good word" from Nash himself), but at the same time I can't help but find a bit of irony in the fact that Nash got his panties in a twist over Joe's comments, which are EXACTLY the type of "screw you, old guys" comments that gained Kevin Nash and his pals some of the biggest success in his career (remember Nash and the nWo's infamous burial of Arn Anderson and the Four Horseman with the "not my dog spot, or my liver spot" promo?).


Samoa Joe Apologizes for PPV Promo
Booker T and Kurt Angle Try to Boost Backstage Morale

After the backstage brouhaha subsided, TNA apparently called a company meeting, where Joe apologized to anyone he might have offended, and two "veteran" superstars then took turns giving morale speeches to the TNA locker room. Those two individuals?

None other than recent TNA acquisitions (and longtime WWE alumni) Kurt Angle and fellow WWE release Booker T.

Now regarding the pep talks?

I will say that I find it pretty screwy that Kurt Angle and Booker T -- two guys whose collective tenure in TNA amounts to less than just about ONE YEAR -- were the "locker room leaders" who stepped up and gave the morale boosts to the rest of the boys. Not only are both of these guys (relatively) fresh off of WWE tenures, they're also both comfortably positioned at the top of the card (despite being relatively new to the TNA locker room), AND they're probably making a fair bit more dough for their services than your average "homegrown" TNA talent (think Johnny Devine).

Now true, Hearing a "keep it up, boyz!" pep-talk from Johnny Devine *might* just fall on deaf ears, and even a longtime TNA "star" like AJ Styles would look kinda' silly saying "stick it out, TNA'ers... and if you're lucky, you can be like ME and go from being a former World Champion to playing a distant, comic second-fiddle to the WWE crew!"-- and so MeeThinks there's at least something to be said for the "veteran" status of guys like Angle and Booker T (especially Booker, who's pretty much seen just about every locker room -- good and bad -- in the past decade).

All in all, though --

MeeThinks we're treading precariously close to a "life-imitating-art-imitating-life" scenario when it comes to morale and roster division within the TNA locker room, and while we all know that Vince Russo is historically big on "worked shoot" storylines (translation: making onscreen angles out of real-life backstage drama)... the bottom line is there seems to be an uncomfortable cloud hanging over just about everything TNA does these days, and the've really got to work towards dispelling it -- and QUICK -- before they fall victim to the same "demons" that have claimed many a 'rasslin organization in the past.

I'm not saying that TNA is on death's door, mind you -- far from it. I'm merely saying that if you are a *real* TNA fan, and if you really do want to see the company succeed both for its own sake and the sake of the North American wrestling business on the whole, then these next few months will be a critical time in making your voices heard and supporting the company as it attempts to (re?)discover an identity of its own that can amount to more than just the "island of misfit toys" for the WWE washouts and retirees.


Senshi Granted Release by Dixie Carter
Erstwhile "Low Ki" Wraps Second TNA Tenure This Week

More DRAMMAAA from TNA this week as Senshi (a.k.a. Low Ki) was granted his release from the company following a big ole' talent meeting this past Monday. Apparently, TNA agents and bosses came to the meeting with each performer's contracts in hand, and they offered a carte blanche release to any superstar who wanted to walk away from the TNA fold, no strings attached or questions asked. The only guy who took 'em up on the offer was Triple X member and former X Division Champion, Senshi (previously known as Low Ki, both in TNA and throughout the indies -- not to mention ROH).

Anyhow --

For as boneheaded as this "put up or shut up" tactic seems to be on the surface (because seriously now, what in the blue hell would TNA have done if 90% of their roster just stood up and was like "yeah, ok, I'm outta' here." And no fair saying "um, they'd do what they always do -- and go on a hiring spree of the latest batch of WWE releases!") -- bottom line is that a lot of "good" came out of what could have been a very BAD situation.

1) It allowed the star(s) who've been vocal about their frustration with the company to take their stand. Sure it's kind of a catch 22 to tell a guy the size and stature of Sharkboy "hey, you think you're gonna' find better work than THIS? Go for it" -- but in the end, it could go a long way towards help quelling at least *some* of the most vocal of TNA critics backstage. In other words, if you didn't take 'em up on the offer to walk away Scott free -- then things can't possibly be *that* bad, so quitcherbitchin.

2) It gave the star(s -- actually, just "star" singular) who actually wanted out of the company a chance to cut the cord. Senshi has been very reluctant to play ball with TNA for some time (the fact that he changed his ring name specifically while for TNA is a pretty solid sign of how much he felt invested in the company), and all reports have indicated that the guy has been clamoring for a "get out of jail free" card for months now. If he doesn't wanna' be there, why keep him? Roderick Strong, Austin Aires and many others have done perfectly well for themselves after departing the TNA fold -- so why make both the company and the performer unhappy by sticking around if you feel you'd be better served plying your trade elsewhere?

3) It resulted in something of a "fresh start" for the stars that decided to stick with the company, as it let 'em know that they were neither being held against their will nor forced to stick around solely for the sake of a paycheck if they actually felt it'd be better for their career to try their fortunes elsewhere.

Now sure --

TNA's "free escape" meeting reeks of late-day WCW antics (offering no-strings-attached releases from a company that many might argue is struggling to establish direction can often prove disasterous), and they have done a tremendous deal to further convolute (dare we say "botch") the on-screen ramifications of this latest off-screen development (Senshi had already won a pink slip in his "Feast of Fired" briefcase... so why not just write him out of the storylines using that?!)... but the bottom line is that the performers that remained on the TNA roster did so because -- for whatever reason they might individually have -- they simply believe that TNA is the single best place for their respective careers at this juncture.

Whether that's because they:

a) simply can't find work elsewhere
b) dig the lax drug policy and lightened work load
c) have burned bridges with WWE in the recent past, or...
d) some combination of all of the above

... remanins to be seen. But the long and short of things is that with Senshi gone, TNA is left with a roster that -- at least once in recent history -- actually HAD the option to walk out if they wished, but made the informed and free decision to stick with the company regardless of their current frustrations. That speaks volumes as to the level of commitment of the remaining TNA roster... and (hopefully) it could go a long way in dispelling a good deal of that "everybody backstage thinks TNA is a sinking ship" gossip that's been plaguing the company for months.


TNA Cancels Mexican House Show Tour
Poor Ticket Sales Put Nix on International Dates

More disappointing news out of Orlando this week as after a travel/ticketing snafu resulted in a cancellation of international TNA shows earlier in the year, the company was forced to cancel a second batch of international shows -- this time scheduled throughout Mexico.

Obviously this news has left many a TNA fan in the dumps, as:

a) crappy backstage morale
b) open invitations to walk out on talent contracts
c) defecting "young guys" and home-grown stars
d) influx of established (but older) "superstars," and now...
e) canceled show dates

... doesn't look all that promising as the company struggles to establish *anything* resembling positive momentum.

All that said, however --

It's probably worth noting that the failure to expand into international markets isn't NEARLY as big of a monumental failure as so many a critic is making it out to be. Let's face it, TNA is still a relatively young company -- and though they've seen tremendous expansion in the past five years (first in securing weekly PPVs, then weekly television, then national television, then monthly PPVs, then expanded time on national television, etc.) -- the bottom line is that they still have a long way to go before they can ever reasonably attempt to command serious and steady dough by way of international markets.

Heck, there are wrestling fans living in the UNITED STATES who've never seen a TNA broadcast (let alone a live show)! And so while it sucks to have the bottom fall out on this Mexico tour, fans have got to keep a proper perspective on the situation, and recognize that there are still *plenty* of untapped markets and gains to be made in the promotion's home country before it puts all of its proverbial eggs in the basket of international success.

Baby steps, people. Baby steps.

When TNA can actually start turning a profit in the U.S. (shoot, let's start by even turning a profit for admission in Orlando alone!), THEN we can concern ourselves with missed opportunities and canceled shows south of the border or across the Atlantic. This isn't a sign of TNA's impending doom, folks -- it's just a classic sign of the typical problems a young company can face.




My esteemed colleague Jeff Small recently said that he hates seeing reader mail features in news columns, because he finds them distracting and thinks they're really nothing more than space filler. I'd argue that he'd be singin' a *much* different tune if he actually, ya' know, ever *received* any reader mail to begin with.

... but then again, that would require people reading his column in the first place. ;-)

HIYO!!!

I keed, I keed. Now on with the mail!

J2K Winger gets us started with some Thinks on the Hogan family drama, and a pretty awesome story to boot:

Always good to see you turn in your own optimistic views on the news of our so-called-sport, Meehan.

I hadn't considered the possible theory that the Hogan divorce is a protection tactic to save some of their money from the impending lawsuit from Graziano's family. But with the other recent news that the Hulkster himself may have bought the booze that fueled young Nick's street racing accident, I'm personally wondering if NBC isn't going to get concerned about their re-vamped American Gladiators show.

Let's face it, while Hulk Hogan is still a name that draws notice, right now, the notice his name is bringing is pretty bad:

(1) His son was involved in a horrific car accident that left another man in a vegetative state, an accident in which alcohol is involved. By all accounts, the Grazianos are likely to file civil charges once the criminal trial is over, meaning there's two lawsuits hanging over the Bollea family right there.

(2) His wife has filed for divorce. Regardless of the reasoning behind the filing, that's still a THIRD legal matter that the Hulkster's gonna have to deal with.

(3) His name has been implicated in the purchase of the alcohol that caused Nick's accident, not to mention the fact that he contributed to the delinquency of a minor. No doubt the law will seek to file charges about that, so that's a fourth lawsuit, even supposing the Grazianos don't hold Hulk responsible along with his son.

That's a good possible FOUR lawsuits that Hulk Hogan is facing right now, right before his new show's about to debut. Of course, if the show makes it to the air in light of these legal woes, then at least Hulk's got some money flowing in to PAY for all these legal problems.

Having recently begun attending ROH shows in Philadelphia (since their venue there is the closest they come to Northern Virginia), I can definitely say the atmosphere at an ROH show is unlike anything I've experienced at WWE events. The two more recent shows I attended (Death Before Dishonor V Night 2 and Glory By Honor VI Night 1) in particular proved this. Now, like many a smark in the ROH crowd, I was trying to get myself over a little bit. (And to all the critics who hate fans like that, I ask this: have you ever taken a sign to a WWE, WCW, or ECW show? If so, you were trying to get yourself over. Therefore, be quiet. Otherwise, well, yes, I'm an asshole for trying to get myself over. Thanks for noticing.) I chose to get myself over by taking along a small dry-erase board, taking a page from the fans I've seen on TV in the ImpactZone on TNA.

So throughout the night I would hastily scrawl some presumably witty phrase on the board and hold it up during entrances (and occasionally with a comment on a match and hold it up for other fans to laugh at -- which they did), mostly hoping to get a reaction from the wrestlers.

At DBDV Night 2, I did get noticed a few times. The first time was by Jack Evans. The sign at the moment read "You Can't Stop The Jack Attack" and during Jack's pre-match posing in the corner, he saw the sign, smiled, and pointed right at it. If you watch the DVD, you might not see me directly, but you can see Jack doing this. At the end of the show, just before the Philly Street Fight between the No Remorse Corps & Matt Sydal and the Resilience & Delirious, my sign read "No Charisma Corps." Sydal looked over, saw my sign, and laughed, then tried to get the attention of Roderick Strong to point it out, but then the lights went out for the other team's arrival.

Still, the coolest thing that happened that night happened DURING that match. Austin Aries attacked the NRC through the crowd, and there was the big brawl in and around ringside to start before everyone paired off and went throughout the arena. Davey Richards and Aries came through my section, and as they passed, I held up my chair. Aries promptly grabbed my chair as he stalked after Davey, then used it on him. Very awesome, and it made me feel as if I was at an old-school ECW event.

At GBHVI Night 1, my seats were front row, so I had even more chances for interaction, especially with the dry-erase sign. Shane Hagadorn accompanied Brent Albright and B.J. Whitmer for their match against Kevin Steen & El Generico, and he was constantly ragging on the crowd. "You're all idiots! Especially this guy!" and he points at me, mostly 'cuz my sign had read "iOlé!" during Steen-erico's entrance.

Later on, Davey Richards came out for his match against Delirious, and so I reprised my "No Charisma Corps" sign. Davey, during his pre-match posing, stood on the turnbuckles, looked right at me, and gestured for me to come ... suck it, as it were. When I promptly declined, he invited me to do it again. And so it went until finally I shouted something at him. (It might have been "F*** you, you want a blowjob, go ask B.J.!") In retrospect, I will admit that Davey has more charisma than I originally gave him credit for, and he certainly has more than Roderick Strong. The match saw another great bit of crowd interaction, as during the match, someone took notice of Davey's new tights, and yelled out "Davey really likes lightning bolts!" Delirious looked up and nodded. "Yeah, he does!" he called out, right before attacking again.

Right before intermission came the Age of the Fall (Jimmy Jacobs, Necro Butcher, and Tyler Black, with Lacey) against the Vulture Squad (Jack Evans, Ruckus, and Jigsaw, with Julius Smokes). I was actually supporting the AOTF that night, and so I was wearing a black bandana over my face along with my black-themed outfit. Well, Smokes (being a former associate of Homicide) took exception to that and snapped at me, "Take that thing off yo' face, you ain't no gangsta!" I shouted back, "You ain't no gangsta either, so shut the f*** up!" Smokes promptly turned back to me, flashing those gold teeth in what was probably meant to be a scary grin, and advanced on me slowly. Now, that might've been intimidating, if Smokes hadn't decided to do the Vulture Squad arm-flap as he did so. I just flapped my arms back mockingly and gave him the finger.

All in good fun, mind you. Smokes is a riot to watch.

Being that the main event of that show featured four stars from Pro Wrestling NOAH, in particular the legendary (and sadly broken-down) Mitsuharu Misawa, I made a proper poster to take with me as well, which read, in Japanese lettering "Arigatou, NOAH" ("Thank you, NOAH") During intermission, all four NOAH stars (Takeshi Morishima, Naomichi Marufuji, KENTA, and Misawa himself) were signing autographs to anyone who'd bought a ticket for that privilege. As I went to go get my autographs, I passed a Japanese VIP guest (probably a relative of one of the NOAH guys or someone from their office), who saw my sign, stopped me and held up his camera. I obliged, holding it up and giving a thumbs up before getting the autographs.

Proof, for those who want it:



And for legibility:



Also during intermission, while I was waiting in line for concessions (I wanted some bottled water and an energy drink for the ride home), I look over to my left to see a bunch of fans crowding around someone and taking pictures. Then some people clear out and who else is it but motherf***in' HOMICIDE. He was real cool to everyone who was stopping to take their picture with him, and meanwhile there was me, next in line to get served at concessions (which had a HUGE line), without even my cell phone camera, which was back at my seat. I wasn't the only person in line cursing themselves for that, but it was pretty cool to see that 'Cide had turned up for the show.

The main event tag between Marufuji & Morishima vs KENTA & Misawa was perhaps not as good as it could have been, mostly due to Misawa's age and health, but it was still entertaining. Marufuji's gotten some criticism from some American fans for not being as impressive as they'd hoped, and I'll admit to being one of them, but after watching him live, I can see why he's getting more fans with each show. He's VERY entertaining to watch. At one point early in the match, Marufuji kept trying to sneak into the ring to rescue Morishima from a submission from Misawa, but every time he started to climb through the ropes, the crowd would shout at him, so he'd stop, look at us, and think about it. He'd try it again, and get the same reaction, and looked confounded, like "How am I going to get away with it?" Then some guy in the crowd called out "In America, we have this thing called a TAG ROPE!" Marufuji looked at him, then promptly grabbed the tag rope, which got a big laugh. He'd tease chants out of the crowd, and even tried to translate for us when NOAH's Japanese timekeeper called out the minute marks. These were all done in Japanese, and the first one confused the hell out of the building, and Marufuji held up his hand and tried to explain that "five minutes have passed." Marufuji sold Misawa's elbows like death, just keeling over after getting nailed with one, and was just a real kick to watch. KENTA was every bit as good as I've seen, even after working the majority of the match for his team, and Morishima's always impressed me.

All in all, if you ever get the chance to attend an ROH live event, by all means do so. They always go out to put on a hell of a show, and the crowd is just unbelievable. I've already got front-row tickets to the next ROH show in Philly, on March 15, so I'll no doubt get in on some more crowd interaction spots.

Keep up the good work, Meehan!

-=Jay 2K Winger=-

That's a hell of a ROH story, Jay. Very, very cool.

Regarding the Hulkster lawsuit situation --

I wouldn't count on NBC pulling the plug on their relationship with Hogan just yet. Sure, he's wading through a fair share of personal drama these days... but he also just so happens to be one of the single most recognizable television personalities in the "unscripted" world of television amid the Tinseltown screenwriters' strike.

As a result?

"No press is bad press."

And the Hulkster is probably a safe bet to remain with American Gladiators (at least for the immediate future), as he's really one of their biggest selling points -- and his "good" potential most definitely outweighs his "bad" personal baggage... which really ain't all that shocking by Hollywood standards, when it comes right down to it.


Zeke Campbell shares a few up-close and personal 'rassler stories of his own, one of which came courtesty of one of the most unlikely (and often forgotten) "superstars" of yesteryear:

I was reading the stories of the wrestlers that people had met, and I had a few to pass along. When I was 12 yrs old, my family went on vaction to Orlando. This was back when WCW still taped a show there. I got to see a bunch of nobodys, except Flair cut a promo with Mean Gene.

anyway, as I was leaving, Ice Train was walking. There was a huge group of people and nobody but I reconized him. I yelled out "holy crap, its Ice Train!" and he was so happy someone reconized him, he brought my brother and I back in to watch the second taping, front row. After he squashed a guy, he came over and gave me a big hug that ended up on TV and I still haved taped to this day.

As we were leaving the second time, Brian Pillman was standing outside with his luch in his hand and I got my picture with him. It was awesome.

Last year, Raw did a house show here in Des Moines and afterwords, my friends and I went to Perkins. We sat in the smoking section because the other guys smoke and who should walk in but Orton and his fiance(hottie!!!), Umaga, Armando, and someone else who's name escapes me. We are marking out huge, and we get autographs from everyone. That at the table next us and as one of my friends lights up, Ortons fiance starts to caugh. Orton leans over, very nicely, and asks for him to put it out. He agrees and we go about our dinner. As we are leaving, Orton offers to pay for all our meals because we were nice. We refused, but it was an awesome gesture that we will never forget. We still crack jokes about that night.

Thanks

- zeke_campbell

RANDY ORTON OFFERED TO BUY YOU DINNER!?!?

Alright, it's official, folks -- Zeke Campbell is, without question, the man to beat when it comes to wrestler road stories. I mean, the Ice Train front row hug is one thing... but a free meal on The Legend Killer? That's gonna' be a tough act to follow!


Another face-to-face-with-the-greats road story, from M.C. Cavenaugh:

Reading the wrestler meeting stories made me think of an encounter I had years ago that helps establish Undertaker is the coolest dude ever.

The show was in Fayetteville, NC, and there's a Popeye's Chicken right by the Coliseum. My roommate and I stopped in to eat chicken before going to the
show, and since we always show up ridiculously early, it was probably four hours until the doors opened. Anyway, we're sitting there, and this silly tall guy walks in... long reddish hair...

My roommate looks at me and goes "Holy shit- it's the Undertaker!" We both mark out, acting like the geeky fanboys we are, but decide not to bother him, just
watching this mountain of humanity go through the line and order his food. He stands over to the side, and like ten minutes go by. We're trying to figure out why he's still there when they start piling boxes on the counter.

Boxes and boxes. Like, ten boxes of chicken. Bags and bags are next, probably filled with side dishes. Anyway, Taker looks over everything, scoops it up, and
heads for the door. We're staring in awe, because really, I've never seen that much chicken in my life. It had to be ten or fifteen twenty piece boxes. Anyway, Undertaker looks at us and nods, and we both nod, eyes glued to the amount of food... and he says "Just a little pre-match snack, fellas."

Then he was gone. It was awesome.

As for guys that are kinda dickish, I have to add Perry Saturn to the list. A guy I worked with managed a gym during the day (this was in my bouncer days),
and all the WWF (then) guys would work out there when they were in town. He'd always let me know, and I'd go hang out with him and just watch the guys work, talk, etcetera. Always fun. Anyway, they had tanning beds, and Perry Saturn came up to my friend, Rob, and said "Can I use the tanning beds?"

So Rob says "Sure. It's all free."

Perry: No, I mean will I fit in the bed.

Rob: Yeah, I use them all the time... they're fine.

(For the record, Rob is about 6'8 and roughly the size of a Chevy Blazer.)

Perry: Yeah, but I'm really jacked.

And he was dead serious. He ended up not using the tanning bed because he didn't believe it would hold him.

Anyway, I enjoy the column, and good luck finishing your Master's.

Best,

- M.C. Cavenaugh

That Undertaker story is pretty freakin' surreal, dude! I had a friend and fellow 'rasslin' fan who once encountered the Dead Man while working at a toy store late one night in the mall, and his version of the story is pretty similar to the "he spoke not a word but went straight to his work" account you've detailed above (hey, it's December, alright?).

My buddy, while working the register: "OH MY GOD! IT'S THE UNDERTAKER!!!"

'Taker, in street clothes: "NOT NOW. I'M SHOPPING."

... and just like that, the conversation was over and the guy was gone.

Pretty freakin' cool.

As for Saturn, while your friend might have had an underwhelming encounter with the guy in the past, I can't help but give Perry something of a free pass as one of the genuine "good guys" ever to have set foot in a wrestling ring. I'm pretty sure he was an Airborne Ranger (sex and danger!) for the United States Army prior to making the jump to pro wrestling, and even after his in-ring days with the 'E had drawn to a close, he demonstrated a serious degree of "real life heroism" in April of 2004 -- taking three bullets directly through his neck and spine when he interferred and succeeded in stopping an attempted rape.

So again, while "jacked up prick in a tanning bed" is hardly a claim to "nice guy" fame, it kinda' gets a free pass in the bigger picture, at least in my book.


Brandon Sloss shares a few 'rassler stories from both sides of the spectrum:

have a couple stories to past along about meeting wrestlers. The first one happens about when I was 10 years old or so, I was in San Antonio and I and my mother were in the airport getting ready to get our bags. I looked over at the car rental and I saw the Hitman in all his entrance gear, the undertaker in full original undertaker clothes and Tito Santana. I got Bret's autograph and even though he was sick and could barely talk he took time to do so, and Tito was very nice of course and very polite. The Undertaker in true kayfabe fashion didn't speak but shook my hand as well as my mother's, my mom is 5'10 and I was just a little guy at this time but he was huge and his hand engulfed my mom's hands and to this day she talks about it.

The other story happened the day of the WCW had its first wwe show in Tacoma Washington, (when they had the Booker T/ Buff Bagwell Disaster) We were going to the smackdown taping the next day and got into Tacoma kinda late we decided to order some Tony Roma's and pick it up. When we got there I noticed at a table was Chris Jericho, Edge, Christian, Rhino, and Raven. I asked if he could take pictures with them when they were done eating and apologized for bothering them. We sat in the lobby and when they came out they took pics with me and my gf at the time, and signed some stuff. All were really polite, but the best was Edge. You can tell he is a true fan of wrestling we were talking about classic moments and the other guys basically had to pull him away from us so they could go. Ever since that moment I have always like Edge because its nice to see that someone is doing what they love and still can be a true fan as well.

One other side story my uncle Jack who sad to say killed himself, did a lot of partying with the Funks, Dusty Rhodes, and Dick Murdoch among others during their times in the Amarillo area since he lived in Canyon TX.

- Brandon Sloss

Pretty sweet string of stories there, Brandon. Sorry to hear about your uncle, though it's cool to hear that he had a chance to party alongside some of the most notorious wildmen in the 'rasslin business all the same.

Tito Santana actually owns a nail salon up in my college roommate's hometown in Jersey, and from what the roommate tells me, the guy is always very humble and appreciative whenever there's a local fan/recognition kind of thing in the neighborhood. As for Edge, he's about as true a "fan-to-famous" kinda' story as you'll find -- so it's good to hear that he still takes time out of his "gimmick" to chat and rub elbows with the people who might one day follow in his footsteps, not to mention those who (effectively) dictate his paycheck.


Christian Bellamy chimes in with some 'Thinks about Ric Flair's retirement run:

In addition to have Ric outsmarting less experienced opponents rather than outwrestling them, they could play up the "dirtiest player in the game" side of Ric. It has been one of his trademarks throughout his career and At this stage I don't think would affect his Face status.

Regards,

- Christian

Well scouted, Christian -- and thanks for bringing that point up! In writing these puppies week-in and week-out, sometimes verbosity gets the best of Mee and I tend to go on too long in describing a given point. As a result (and for fear of making the same mistakes!) every now and again I'll short-change a detail or two in an effort to put the greatest focus on the biggest points... but you're absolutely right, and bravo for the addition!


Greg Downcannon goes even one step further in his FlairThinks, and posits a "dream match" payoff to The Nature Boy's swansong:

Hey John,

Great article as always, but after reading your WM predictions, I couldn't help but offer just one. Why not combine your first two news items, and have Flair go out against Sting? There's nobody Flair wanted to put over more than the Stinger. Sting then signs a legends deal, gets a DVD set, a few never before seen feuds over the course of 2008, and maybe then a title run that ends with him returning the title to John Cena at WM25, the same weekend he inducts Flair into the HOF.

- Greg

A pretty kickass scenario if I do say so myself, Greg. But with Stinger being kinda vocal about *not* signing with WWE in the past, and with the current Flair storyline being something that (on paper, at least) looks to build to one big payoff where he gives the rub to some guy who can take it and use it to garner some momentum of their own from there on out -- I'm gonna' have to go on record as calling this one a longshot, at this point. Possible? Without question... and I'm sure that if we fans and armchair planners out in cyberspace have thought of the idea, you just KNOW it's been mentioned at least once in a WWE booking committee meeting some time in the past few months.

Probable? Not anywhere near likely. It'd draw huge money, granted (WCW diehards would come out of the woodwork for a last hurrah between two of that company's best)... and a DVD-tie-in would be a no-brainer, but simple logistics tell Mee that it's a shot in the dark, at best. I'd love to see it happen... but I'm not gonna' get my hopes up.


Troy has Thinks all over the place, and so we'll let him close out the column this week:

I want to start by saying you write a great column week in and week out. That's not a statement meant to kiss your ass it's just to let you know you do a great job. Now on with some thoughts.

First off looking at the future of the WWE and it's new superstars I think the future looks brite. CM Punk, John Morrison, Cody Rhodes, Mr. Kennedy all seem to have the potential to be great characters be it heel or face and can lead the E into the future. But there is one guy who may very well have what it takes to be the next break out star ala The Rock, Trips, and Stone Cold, and that guy is MVP. MVP has a good look, a good character, good mic skills and his wrestling ability is improving all the time. Give the man one more year and we may very well have our next Rock vs Austin feud in MVP vs Cena. MVP vs Cena with the right build has money written all over it. I think given time the fans will turn MVP face just like with The Rock, and that's when he will take off.

Second I have an idea. Forget the new Hart Foundation, I got a new stable in mind. Take DH Smith and Cody Rhodes and Nattie Neidhart and put them together. They all are second generation wrestlers all have famous wrestling fathers and all are young. But they would need a leader and that leader would be Randy Orton he fits all the attributes I layed out, but the big difference is he's a world champion. They could start off as a version of Evolution and see where it takes them. Also down the line they could add Ted Dibiase Jr. in the mix. It's just a thought.

Now for TNA. The booking team there just can't get anything right. Hall and Nash headlining a PPV, are they serious with that call? What is anyone in this match going to get out of it except a big payday for Hall and Nash? I just don't get it. I watch impact every week hoping they have some new good ideas and I'm disappointed every week. The only thing I notice is that Samoa Joe has lost his momentum. The reactions he gets from the crowd are not what he was getting 4,5 months ago. TNA has taken their new break out star and made him into just another guy. AJ has been turned into a complete fool. As a heel AJ could be so much better. Where is Chris Daniels? Another great wrestler now where to be found, instead we get Eric Young every week(he sucks) Team 3D is a waste. They are the biggest has beens. They should not even be in the business anymore. TNA needs new people in charge of booking and making creative decisions. Until that happens they won't even be able to compete with ECW. That's all I got. I'm out.

- Troy

Great points all around, Troy -- and thanks for the kudos :) To YourThinks, roughly in order:

1) MVP is money, both in the ring and behind the microphone. If Chris Benoit fans have anything to "thank" the guy for (which is still, understandably, something of a taboo in this industry, and will likely remain so for years to come), it's *not* in the guy's personal life or technical skill, but perhaps in the fact that his unspoken "legacy" can still be seen in how he so clearly inspired (and improved) the in-ring abilities of guys like Porter and Punk.

2) I'm an absolute sucker for stables (especially dominant heelish ones who help build breakout stars -- though these are, admittedly, a rarity), and so I am all for an Orton-ized stable to help surround the guy with something... ANYTHING... to make him seem more three-dimensional and effective.

For an Orton stable to work, they'd most definitely need to build his group out so as to make it look like the folks he'd taken "under his wing" were really just there because they were too young and green to realize what a thorough-going douchebag the Randy Orton character really is. Not only would this hammer home how "selfish" and "manipulative" Randy Orton can be, but it'd also help weave a neat little backstory for each of the people who surround him, as Orton would be surrounded by a bunch of lackeys who thought buddying up with The Legend Killer would be their "fast track to the big time" (despite the fact that he's pretty much made it clear that he's "out for himself and *only* himself" from day one).

Your proposed roster of an Orton-led second (and third) generation stable is as good as any I've seen. The trick, of course, is getting people to care about all of these "new guys" if all they're doing is serving as hired muscle for little more than a "transitional champion." If the centerpiece looks weak, and the rest of the gang is too "new" to stand on their own merits, then the stable just won't work.

3) For as much as I really do like the company and want to see them succeed, TNA makes Mee scratch my head, sometimes. (Minor Spoilers ahead) In the past month alone, we've seen them:

Put Rikishi/Junior Fatu on their TV tournament for a title shot DESPITE the fact that the guy never actually signed a contract. And then act shocked and amazed when he no-shows.

Book a tournament where one of three guys who actually WON a match is up for more punishment than the six guys who LOST their matches in round one.

Push (the notoriously unreliable) Scott Hall as a PPV main-event selling point (again, no contract), only to have him no-show.

Send Samoa Joe out with a live mic on PPV and tell him (effectively) to talk shit on guys who are too lazy to view TNA as anything more than an easy paycheck (yet THEN they go off on him for saying exactly that).

Have two guys who've been with the company less than a year COMBINED tell the young bucks to "keep their chins up" (despite the fact that both of these "veterans" just recently defected from WWE and were immediately pushed to the top of the TNA card).

Book a (wacky, non-finish) battle royal where one guy "gets fired" for WINNING (?!?), only to have one of those "winners" actually quit the company the next day, but then NOT write off his exit as part of their regularly scheduled storyline.

Book a(nother wacky) match where the guy who's really quitting the company (Senshi) loses his "mystery" briefcase (containing a pink slip) to another guy who's NOT actually leaving the company at all. In essence, leaving a "real" departure unexplained, while scheduling a "fake" departure around a second performer altogether.


I just don't get it, is all.


And With That, I'm Outta' Here

That does it for Mee for this week. By the time next week's column hits the world wide webzis, I'll be off and up out of gloomy D.C. and kicking back and relaxing in my favorite vacation destination on the planet, Walt Disney World (yup, that's trip number three this year for anyone keeping tabs at home). If somebody could be so kind as to TiVo the Pats game against the Jets, that'd be swell. Wouldn't want to miss the opportunity to see New England go a whopping 14-0, you know.

Yes Steelers fans, that's right. I said it. FOURTEEN and 0... because this weekend (to paraphrase the immortal words of my handy, dandy John Cena CD) you're gonna' see the Pats catch "the Steel Curtain lookin' Venetian blinds."

'Till next week, enjoy the game and the snow, and always stay positive!

- Meehan

The National Domestic Violence Hotline : [phone]-SAFE.