Truth B Told 3.06.08: Can You Hear Me Now? Good.

Posted by Bayani Domingo on 03.06.2008

Making a real connection with the fans is one of the most important things a wrestler can do in and out of the ring. So why have there been so many dropped calls lately?

So my friends got me into this new reality show on Bravo called, "The Millionaire Matchmaker". It's horrible, basically this drag queen looking "matchmaker" who is a high priced relationship "pimp" for all these supposed millionaires looking for a relationship. She goes out and recruits all these women who are then introduced to members of the "Millionaire's Club" in the hopes of making a love connection. The basic premise is not to change the women to match the guy or "make over" the guy to make him more appealing or "datable" to the women, but just throw two people together and hope they have good chemistry. Because that always works for us regular guys, then again...I'm not a millionaire...I'd probably be boning twin gymnasts on the daily if I was.

I've seen parts of 2 episodes and for the most part they all boil down to these attractive women who all seem to be "actresses and (fill in the blank)" figuring out if they're willing to sleep with these aging playboys or lonely workaholics, who knew there were that many wannabe actresses in LA? Oh yeah, I DID. Basically it comes down to whether they feel like they've made a "connection" or not. Most times…it's not. Really there is only so much you can do to prep yourself for a date or a relationship, no matter how much natural talent or charisma you have, if you can't make a simple "connection" then ultimately that relationship is going to fail at some point. While some people have that instant ‘spark' other people need to develop it over time. Sometimes you fool yourself into thinking that the "connection" is imminent because they are so perfect for you in so many ways, but really you're just fooling yourself, at some point you know if it's going to happen or not. Either you're going to find a companion and possible mate, or you're going to find a Carlito. And that's….not cool.

What really had me thinking this week is that on the RoH Newswire they had the Vulture Squad's Jigsaw unmask. I was surprised as anyone to realize that JC Chavez was actually the CHIKARA original, but then I guess RoH is just full or surprises. The reason he unmasked was to "transform" and to be able to "show some emotion" to the fans because the mask was apparently holding him back, not just emotionally but in the "win-loss" column. That was Kayfabe via the impassioned pleas by Julius Smokes. The reported real reason was that both Jigsaw and Gabe felt that the mask hurt his ability to "connect" with the fans since they couldn't read his expressions as well as being "uncomfortable". While I can't speak to the comfort level of wearing a full mask I can say that the whole "fan connection" thing can be difficult. By "Full mask" I mean a mask that covers a wrestler's entire face. El Generico, Delirious, Abyss, Rellik, etc. all wear masks that at least show some parts of their face, usually the mouth. Look around at all the wrestlers in the industry that are fairly well known and there are really only a few to be found: Super Dragon (PWG), Shark Boy (TNA), Curry Man (TNA), Hallowicked (Various), Phoenix Star (PWG), and pretty much most of CHIKARA. I'll save the whole CHIKARA phenomenon for another column, but I think it's clear that the atmosphere there is unique and the tradition of masked wrestlers is just a different animal all together compared with your usual US Company. Up until recently most of those guys didn't really talk at all in the ring, Sharky and to some extent Curry man are the only exceptions. It's hard to get over wearing a mask, but not impossible.

Super Dragon managed to build quite a career based on moveset, non-verbal communication, and just stomping the hell out of opponents. Hallowicked and Phoenix Star rely more on the traditional Lucha philosophies of "workrate over mic-rate" and Shark Boy…well yeah, mute or talking Shark Boy is just pretty much a gussied up jobber, so you can see how that makes it hard to get over. Still, you can point to the awesomeness of Curry Man to see how a full mask isn't necessarily a huge hindrance if you have good charisma, and I seem to remember a fellow named Mistico being fairly popular in Mexico and a guy named Liger doing fairly well in Japan. Then again the foreign markets are very different than it is here in the good ol' US of A.

I'll leave PWG out of the discussion for now, but they have employed their fair share of masked wrestlers in the past and present. I want to concentrate on the theory that the full mask hurt Jigsaw's ability to "connect with the fans" in RoH. Right now if I had to nail down the number of regular or semi-regular masked wrestlers in RoH I would say Delirious, El Generico, Jigsaw, and to an extent Hallowicked. To be fair I think we can agree that Delirious and Generico are clearly the most "over" with the fans and in some small part it has to do with the fact that they don't have full masks and their expressions are much easier to read. Delirious for the most part is just a very unique gimmick that gets over and a lot of his appeal is also his non-sensical linguistics. Generico doesn't speak, except for "ole" and "Brainbustaaah", but the man is an incredible storyteller by way of his facial expressions and body language. Jigsaw and Hallowicked are both fairly new to RoH, but it's clear their expressions and lack of speech (thought both aren't entirely mute) have hurt them to a degree. In a case where you have to rely solely on body language you really need to be a top-notch performer and seller to be able to get over. What I think does help them to a degree is that "uniqueness" both bring to the table.

Hallowicked has a very unique look that sets him apart from the roster. Jigsaw also had this appeal as his name suggests him to be a "mystery" and his ring gear and mask played no small part in that. I can't help but echo Ari's thoughts in last week's "Column of Honor" when he seems to think Jigsaw may have more problems standing out as his persona and gimmick won't match his new look if he no longer is a "puzzle" now that we know who he is. It is going to take a lot of charisma and mat work to get a guy over who looks like every other "Special K" member than it would for someone who stands out from the crowd without even having to put on an arm bar. While losing his mask is a calculated risk, I wonder if both parties really thought this through. I'd rather see a guy in a cool mask and ring gear any day wrestle than "Cody" from ‘Step-by-Step' in the ring still taking pinfalls. Let's just hope the man steps up his game and can back up this decision by stepping up on the microphone even more…oh wait…they already HAVE a mic man in the group. Whoops.

I look at "fan connection" as coming from two very different sources. I think the way to have a fan "connect" with a character either has to be through either being able to "relate" to a wrestler, having "Admiration" of him, or being an "Oddity". When I think of the "admiration" factor I look at a wrestler like Hulk Hogan, Sting (surfer sting), Ric Flair, or currently a Bryan Danielson to some degree. Hulk and Sting had this great aura about them, Hogan was this bigger than life character who seemed Super Human, Sting was this buffed out, tan, surfer dude with great charisma. Ric Flair was the arrogant "heel" who seemed to have it all and did the things that deep down we secretly wanted to do. Danielson to a lesser degree is the uncrowned "Best in the World" at least on the Indy scene and a lot of people look at his skills in the ring as amongst the best of our generation. This also brings back flashes of what a lot of Bret Hart or Benoit fans felt when they were still active. These are the guys we aspire to be. Heck even Randy Orton gets a bit of rub from being the "brash, cocky youngster, with the movie star looks" who seemingly consistently blows chances to cement himself as a major player. Say what you will about the belt he's holding, but it's clear that he's a clear 2nd or 3rd tier down from the Cena's, HHH's, or HBK's. All of whom could easily fit in the "Admiration" category as well.

When I think of a wrestler being an "Oddity", I think of Undertaker, Big Show, Yokozuna, Great Muta, Mankind, or Goldust. While some people can be "oddities" in the way they are unique and different it doesn't mean that just being "different" is enough to be "over" with the fans. I think of being an "oddity" in this case as being able to spark the imaginations of the fans. Being so unique and so strange that fans find it hard to relate to these wrestlers, as if they aren't quite human. When you think of a wrestler being truly undead and indestructible it creates this kind of aura around them. The size of a Big Show or Yokozuna was hard to believe. Mankind was so bizarre and twisted that his own crazy unpredictability made you instantly take notice of him. Even Goldust when he first debuted brought out a weird androgynous and bizarre take on wrestling and social norms to the absolute limit. These are the wrestlers that connect with fans on this weird mental level that just makes you sit up and pay attention because you seem so sucked into their world which is so far from your own.

The last category is the easiest to describe but the hardest to fully understand. When I talk about the "relatability" of a wrestler it has to do with the empathy and connection you feel on a somewhat emotional level with that worker. I think the "Attitude Era" is the perfect representation of when this began to take center stage. The whole "Rock n' Wrestling Era" brought the first wave of "Admiration" and "Oddities" to light, but it wasn't until Stone Cold, The Rock, and then Mick Foley began to rise to popularity that you saw fans being able to "relate" to the wrestlers.

While you might have "admired" The Rock and Austin, on some levels you could fully relate to them. The way Stone Cold was your average Joe just working for a total asshole, you could relate to him. You'd LOVE to be able to give your boss a stunner, you could understood how he must have felt being constantly screwed over and wanting to take out his frustrations out on everyone. While you admired him in many ways, there was a part of you that you could see in him. He wasn't a pretty boy, he was a badass who did what he wanted. While The Rock did have the looks and charisma, a lot of people could relate to his smart ass and cocky attitude. He was a "heel" that you couldn't full admire, but at the same time he was a part of your own ego you felt like you could relate to. He was an "idol" in the same way he was an extension of you, just turned up 1000%. The transition from Mankind to Mick Foley was done to humanize the wrestler, and it worked. Being a regular guy who was a huge wrestling fan and being able to live out his dream as a devoted father and husband, well it's easy to see why so many fans felt an emotional connection to a guy who previously was such an "oddity" to us. They humanized an inhuman character and actually capitalized on that transformation. Why? Because we could relate to him more now, not to say everyone gains by being "humanized", clearly ‘Taker and Kane were more popular as monsters than Biker ‘Taker and the now de-masked Kane. But sometimes it works. I think TNA is now teetering on whether to take the same turn with Abyss. In this case, I think tinkering with success is probably a mistake.

The typical "underdog" gains a lot of support by way of people relating to the "lovable loser" or the "David" who has to constantly face "Goliath" week in and week out. Mysterio, Mikey Whipwreck, and now Colin Delaney fills that role of "underdog". Remember when Barry Horowitz got a small push? People can relate to the "loser" at times. I think the strongest "connection" a wrestler can have many times is the ability to get the fans to relate to them on a personal level. Say what you will about Eddie and Benoit, but when those guys finally won their first World Titles, you could just feel that moment. It was because we could relate to their struggles, that "underdog with their back against the wall" mentality. It's why that kind of moment resonates with you so much more than seeing John Cena or Kurt Angle win their titles. The emotional investment in these wrestlers is what makes it so special. I felt the same way seeing El Generico win the PWG title last year because he was such an "oddity" but at the same time he was so relatable to me. He was this goofy, lovable, underdog babyface that just left everything in the ring each and every time he wrestled that it felt like a travesty for him to not hold the belt. THAT is what great wrestlers do; they make you care, no matter where they wrestle on the card.

It's clear that the "e" understands the importance of being a "relatable" character because they have done a great job with those "My Sacrifice" type video packages and vignettes. They're trying to get fans to emotionally invest in these wrestlers instead of just sitting back and watching them in awe and detachment. The real money is made when you don't just appreciate the quality of the match on PPV, but in the quality of the human beings in it. Whether you would pay money to see your favorite win, or pay it to see someone you hate lose, you're still paying for it. THAT is emotional attachment and THAT is the power of relatability.

I think a great portion of the appeal of Indy wrestling in general is the ability to "Relate" to the wrestlers. People try to talk to the wrestlers before and after the shows, they go up to their merchandise tables to buy their stuff and chat with them, they look them up on myspace, try to find out their real names, pretty much anything to feel closer to them. What makes it such a unique experience is going to a local show and seeing local guys wrestle. The close proximity of you to the ring and access you have to the workers compared to feeling like you're a hundred miles away when you're in the nose bleed section at the Staples Center or MSG. While some people hate the fact that there are so many skinny, pasty, or short Indy guys out there because they look nothing like what a wrestler is "supposed to" look like a lot of fans relish in the fact that their favorite stars are no bigger than them. In a way it makes them feel like they could even be wrestlers themselves. Some people want wrestlers that seem "super human" in their height, size, and physique, and some people want a wrestler who is merely "human". That's why guys like Jack Evans, Matt Sydal, or PAC got so popular; they were tiny people doing big stunts. The "ordinary" doing the "extraordinary", so to speak. I think there is a good deal of Indy fans who want "characters", but just in a way that they are believable. They want someone who is almost a regular person like them, but their volume is just dialed all the way up. Then again, isn't that how you hear a lot of successful wrestlers describe how their kayfabe persona is compared to themselves? It's hard to imagine Marty Wright saying, "Yeah, the Boogeyman is just me…but with a little more make-up and a few more worms…by the way…I AM coming to get you".

When it comes to some wrestlers who haven't achieved the kind of success many people had envisioned for them I think it comes down to the "connection" with the fans they lack. Carlito and Chris Masters are a great example. Carlito was a "unique" gimmick, but wasn't relatable, nor was he an "oddity". Chris Masters' gimmick was that he had an "awesome" physique, but once that was taken away and when put up next to other muscled out guys like John Cena and Bobby Lashley he ultimately failed…well he failed Wellness which took away his whole gimmick, but still. Speaking of Lashley, did anyone else feel completely disconnected to him? It's also not enough to just represent the common fan. Why else do so many RoH students find it hard to get over with the fans? They are relatable right? They are wrestling fans who have a dream and look like you and me, but there is nothing else for us to hold on to, nothing that sparks our imagination or illicits and emotional response from us. I think that's the same reason so many PWG wrestlers seem to flounder. I once had high hopes for some of the local guys in SoCal, but its hard to "connect" with a wrestler when they simply lack the charisma or ability to back anything up.

This brings us back to RoH where the roster is littered with guys who have found a great "connection" with the fans like: Jimmy Jacobs, Necro Butcher, Danielson, Austin Aries, Chris Hero, Claudio Castagnoli, Erick Stevens, Larry Sweeney, even Bobby Dempsey. But they've also had some men on the roster who have struggled to connect on their own terms: BJ Whitmer, Brent Albright, Roderick Strong, and regrettably Nigel McGuinness. Okay, I'll have some argument from people I'm sure but it just seems like there has been some sort of detachment regarding Nigel as of late.

While Morishima was champion he at least was a "monster" and had an aura around him that said even though he's not "relatable" he's someone that people took in as an "oddity" and could accept as this unstoppable beast. Nigel's win-loss record leading up to him beating Morishima was nothing to write home about. He also wasn't the best guy they had on the microphone, not the best technical wrestler, the biggest buy on the roster, or anything else that really stood out about him. He WAS a good all around worker and a solid hand, he put on good matches and generally people felt he deserved the belt. But for me there is just some real connection he was missing with the fans and it was pretty evident things weren't helped after he won the title and subsequently became injury prone. I think Gabe finally recognized this and thus we have a new heel turn. Its good to see bookers actually picking up on the fan reactions instead of just ignoring them or chalking it up to some "smarks".

So what about Jigsaw? What about the former "enigma" who has now been solved? He's like a Sudoku with 80 digits already filled in. It is clear that the decision was made to trade in the "oddity" for the "relatability". It's not as if people were looking at Jigsaw in awe as he was a solid worker, but still being a "high flyer" he wasn't even the highest flyer of his own stable. He had a "niche" a "gimmick" to work with and my understanding is that J-Train was going to be his mouth piece. Now he has to blaze a new path without his mask and it's a pretty risky proposition. Now he has to stand out based on either being a better performer than most of the roster or being more charismatic. Problem is there are a lot of great wrestlers who just fail to stand out and capture the attention of the fans. While it's way too early to pass judgment on the success of this experiment it think it bears some following up. Let's hope though that Jigsaw manages to be one of the few success stories of men who dropped their masks. Because by in large history has not been kind to them with a few exceptions.

As you can tell I'm not a big fan of Jigsaw losing his mask, especially since I think he looks a bit generic without it. But I don't really fault them for trying something new to get him over. What I do fault them for is a) not building up this angle so that someone would get the rub by taking his mask, and b) him not losing his mask in CHIKARA first. I know the idea was not to start the new era of "Unmasked Jigsaw" with a loss, but considering how much he's fought to keep that mask, even beating Icarus and taking HIS hair in a match, you'd think that simply taking it off and getting rid of his whole identity for the past 5 years would take more than simply having Julius Smokes goad you into it.

To add to that Jigsaw is a CHIKARA product and having him lose his mask in another company must be upsetting to their fans. I couldn't imagine Generico losing his mask in RoH or if Scorpio Sky lost his mask in some San Diego fed. I kind of feel like this was a big moment that should have happened in CHIKARA, but again I'm sure things happened for a reason. While this sets up a very interesting angle for Jigsaw I think for what he's sacrificed RoH owes him and the VS a decent push as a result. This is a much bigger game for ‘Saw than it is for Gabe and when it all comes down to it, unless you're Rey Mysterio Jr, once you've lost a mask, you can never get it back. I just wonder if this gamble is going to pay off, I guess it's time for Jigsaw to finally "face" the music.

The Truth

I had this theory that deep down inside John Cena made those comments about The Rock because deep down inside he was jealous of him. The Rock was able to connect with such a majority of the audience, not just women and children, but grown men as well. For all that Cena has tried to do to find common ground, he just couldn't do it. The man has tried to be more thuggish, he's stepped up his workrate, he's put out a rap CD and a movie, yet he's still being compared to The Rock. I don't blame him, not everyone can be as universally loved as The Rock, Hogan, or Stone Cold seemed to be, that's what made those men so special. They had this great connection with the fans. I think Cena has a good connection with a big segment of the fans; clearly he wouldn't be where he is if he hadn't but something still feels like it's missing. In wrestling today it's hard to be that awe inspiring figure because we've seen it all. It's hard to come up with a fantastical and unbelievable character because there are only so many worm eating, clock bashing freaks that we can take. So I guess it comes down to become relatable, human, vulnerable. I think that's what wrestling is becoming, the humanization of a super human ideal. The landscape of wrestling is changing because the fans are changing it. Maybe not quickly, but things are changing. You just wait, 5 years from now I'm sure you'll be saying to someone, "Wow, that guy is just a wanna be Cena...I wish that guy was still wrestling...his last movie sucked".

Coming Up Short

So by now we all know that there is a "Special Challenge Match" between RAW and Smackdown featuring Batista vs Umaga. I'm a bit disappointed they couldn't find something better for either man to do, but I guess it'll be a good enough match. I think it's a given that Batista is going over however, but at least Umaga is getting a nice little payday. Better than I can say for the cruisers and the tag teams. What kind of troubles me is that this isn't a 3-way dance. I mean, isn't there 3 brands in the "e"? Why doesn't ECW have a rep? Oh that's right, that whole "talent exchange" thing with Smackdown, so in essence they don't even have an exclusive roster anymore. Granted there are few good choices to rep ECW that could stand a chance against Batista and Umaga without stinking up the match: Big Daddy V (the size works, but my GOD would that be an awful match), Elijah Burke (he'd clearly be the fall taker), Tommy Dreamer (still embroiled in that M&M V.2 feud with Colin Delaney), Kofi (?), Stevie Richards (??), or what about Balls (???). I think in this case it was clear ECW wouldn't be able to really field a worthy competitor, but I think leaving them out of the discussion completely shows us that the "e" knows exactly what we do; in a battle for "Brand Superiority" ECW is coming up woefully short.

6 Degrees of…



The host of one of my favorite shows on Food Network was recently exposed for "padding his resume'". Robert Irvine may just have seen his last "Dinner: Impossible" after claims of him working for the royal family might have been a bit..."fabricated". Sucks, but I guess that's what you get for stretching the truth a bit. Seems like there is a lot of that going around. In fact another famous wrestling liar was exposed this week after supposedly "framing" Vince for being a midget's father. Making me wonder what that whole "deal" they kept talking about was all about. Gee, guess we'll have to either wait till Wrestlemania to find out or....they're just glossing over it. It is the "e" after all. Well let's get to linking this week with....



Fit Finlay. I love his new "face" entrance music, then again I was hoping for the Corrs to actually cover the song...then perform it live....naked. Yeah, I know there is a dude in the group, but you gotta make sacrifices if you wanna see three hot naked Irish sisters right? Right? Damn....still kinda gay huh?

Whatchu talkin' bout readers?

Boy…sure is lonely here…

6 Degrees Results

Well we got a win by default here:
#1

Hello, good sir. Back with this week's winning 6DO entry:

1. Maggie Q was in the 2004 movie "Around The World In 80 Days", which also had Arnold Schwarzenegger.
2. Arnold Schwarzenegger starred in the 1994 movie "True Lies" with Jamie Lee Curtis.
3. Jamie Lee Curtis starred in the excellent 1988 movie "A Fish Called Wanda" with John Cleese, who was a member of Monty Python.
4. After the subject matter of the 1979 Monty Python film "Life Of Brian" scared off the film's original backers (EMI Films), a new film company was set up by ex-Beatle George Harrison to help fund it.
5. George Harrison wrote and sang the Beatles song, "Taxman", which can easily describe the wrestling character Irwin R. Schyster, aka IRS, who was played by Mike Rotunda.
6. In 1999, Mike Rotunda was one of the three wrestlers who reformed The Varsity Club in WCW, and they were accompanied by their cheerleader, Leia Meow, who bounced on a trampoline at ringside.

Double C

I was hoping SOMEONE would use the Kimona link from her time in ECW, but alas it was not to be. Good job Dub-C, maybe next week someone will actually come back and PICK their nomination.

Left Overs…

The WWE is granting 50 wishes to children as part of the Make-A-Wish Foundation. I'm hoping when it's some kid's turn he'll say, "I actually just sold my wish to my brother for $100 and all the X-Box games. He said HIS wish is to ‘teabag' Candice Michelle. What's a ‘teabag'?"

Does anyone else find it racist that on Smackdown Michael Cole is the "Play-By-Play" guy, while Jonathon Coachman is the "Color man"?

Sabin and Shelley will be on "Made" on MTV this Saturday. They'll be teaching a young kid how to be a wrestler. Right afterwards they are airing a special bonus episode of "Made" where Sunny will teach a young girl how to be a ring rat. "You see, the trick is to balance on your elbows so you don't accidentally spit out the crack pipe while he's plowing the ol' "dirty road" …oh, you don't know what that is? Okay…well first off…just relax, okay…and picture a turtleneck sweater…"

Is anyone else waiting for VH1 to run a "Wrestling Celebrity Rehab" show? "Hey, Chico, get your hands off me, I don't have any blow on me…the only thing I'm trippin' on is…Machismo". "...........DAMN!!"

New Japan should enter the energy drink market with a new beverage called, "Fighting Spirit". "Fighting Spirit Energy Drink: No-sell sleep….for two weeks straight."

AAA is trying to get Triplemania out in the US PPV market. That's funny, because I know a lot of people from East LA and for the most part ALL of their TV is PPV. But since most of the electric bills ain't paid, they ain't viewing.

American Gladiators are being scrutinized for looking too ‘roided out? That's just bullshit. How boring is it going to be if the Gladiators are just normal sized people from regular jobs? "From the land of evil accounting, coming in at 5'10", and tipping the scales at a massive 187 lbs… Back Taxes!!" "Owwww….listen up chumps, I am going to Garnish…Your…WAGES!!"

The Hulkster an adulterer? Rumors have it that Hulk had been dropping the "Big 3rd Leg Drop" on one of his daughter's friends. Once again Hogan's career is tainted by a dreaded "Finger poke of Doom".

The Great Booty Debate 2008

The Asian bitches made a comeback this week as Kelly Hu, that's who, beat Victoria Secret's choice for this year's "Sexiest Actress". Yeah, I saw it on VH1 and no I didn't agree, but who am I to argue with a company that has provided teenage boys spank bank material for years? This week we move over to the genre of video games and comics. Representing the comic book geeks everywhere is Rosario Dawson who is getting ready for Sin City II, hopefully in this one Nancy won't be preggers. We match Rosario up against the Goddess of Gamers, G4's Oliva Munn. Yeah, they're both only half...but put them together and you got a whole....and a chubby.

Random Eur-Asian Bitch Lookin' Good Pic of the Week



I bet she knows how to work a joy stick....and a penis. See what I did there?

Random Half-Latina Bitch Lookin' Good Pic of the Week



I wouldn't mind taking a dip in Dawson's creek.

Kim Kardashian is going to be at Wrestlemania as a "celebrity". My guess is she'll be the "corner man" for Batista against Umaga. They'll probably be practicing the "Ass Avalanche" for weeks prior to Wrestlemania. "Look, if you think THAT hurt, Ray J took it full in the face at top speed…quite being a little Bitch-tista. One more time…".

John Legend will be singing "America the Beautiful" at WM. What are the chances he gets hit with an RKO right in the middle of "…sea to shining…" *Bah GAWD, John Legend has been RKO'd straight to HELL*

Pimpin' In High Places

It was a sad week this week as Ashish announced the termination of the 411 Developmental Territory in Paducah, KY. Right now the talent that hasn't been released are being moved over to a place they can still work out the kinks and gain experience in relative anonymity: The Fink's Payload....oh, too late.:

Ask 411 tells you where Boogeyman went. Probably in your bedroom closet...just waiting for you. Go ahead and take a look...I'll wait.

Jules has his Top 10 Under Appreciated matches. None of which involve Boogeyman...so he's not hiding in this column....go back and check under your bed.

Fact or Fiction this week features the RoHbot master Ari vs Mikey MiGo. I think one of the questions actually is: You know who Mikey MiGo is? Fiction.

Csonka has his take on ECW Hardcore TV this week. The old ECW that is, back when you could enjoy a nice flaming table, chair, or barbed wire bat. The only thing flaming in the NEW ECW is The Miz. Hooo-RAH.

HH catches you up on everything you missed during your piss break.

CoH is now Hero-less. I guess a certain citizen of Metropolis found out his likeness was being used without his express written consent. I told Ari that expressed verbal consent wouldn't cut it.

Sammy features Jack Evans vs Super Dragon from BoLA '06. Yeah, the finish was a little botched as it was probably going to be a powerbomb or a reversal to a hurricanrana. Then again...maybe Dragon just resents Jack for stealing his gimmick. Skinny white boy pretending to be Black. Seriously, Dragon pop n' locks with the best of them. Actually the only pop and locks Dragon has is when he has a beer and a bagel.

Did you know that PWG was having a show this weekend. On Friday no less? Yeah, that's going to make things difficult since I'll have to pretty much leave directly from work to watch it in Reseda at 8. If you're interested in going to see: Human Tornado (C) vs Jack Evans, Claudio Castagnoli vs Roderick Strong, Eddie Kingston vs Necro Butcher, The Dynasty vs the Briscoes, and much, much more. Well, if 2 more matches constitute as much more. Then check out: http://www.prowrestlingguerrilla.com. You'll probably see me there...I had the opportunity to hang out with my girlfriend in San Diego to chill with her friends all weekend....but something tells me I'll just skip it for the wrestling, booze, and hookers instead. I mean....staring longingly at her picture till she returns. Yeah....that should fly.

Till then, the Truth will set you free.

-B