411’s Countdown to WrestleMania 24: Evolution Schematic: WrestleMania Celebrities

Graphic by Meehan

Many thanks to Meehan for the banner, and apologies for the teaser.

Note: This is done in the ES style, which, among other things, is Kayfabe in nature. Reader discretion is thusly advised.

Overview

WrestleMania.

A lot has been said about this yearly super-extravaganza. And a lot will continue to be said. It’s the focal point, the turning point, it’s where major changes happen, where things shift. Where the WWF went from a regional company with a hot champion to the start of what would become the gigantic media giant it is today. Where that same hot champion slammed a big guy, and the entire industry changed. Where that same man had his final hurrah with the company, at least for nearly a decade. Where the WWF made another turning point, then a year later capitalized on it. Where the man who brought about those turning points himself turned a corner a few years later, seemingly ending that chapter. A moment that should be remembered for 2 friends’ journeys coming to fruition but is now not something we talk about. Wrestlemania is where the WWF, hell, Pro Wrestling is, for a short time, a major part of the mass media. Sure, it’s there all the time now, it’s a part of the wider entertainment field, but at Wrestlemania, it’s accepted. It’s so big, so huge, that what is normally held at arm’s length as something that mainstream pop culture has to put up with, for a short period of time, it’s accepted, it’s brought into the fold.

It’s a small step of logic to then assume that it’s because of this that celebrities become more likely to either appear to plug something, since the business is so hot, or that it’s the time when said celebs are most likely to let slip that they are fans, since it’s ok to be a fan during that time.

It’s logical. It’s also wrong, to a degree.

Because, while some celebs are there just to make a pay check, just to milk what little fame they have (A couple of beer hocking bimbos spring to mind), Celebrities At Wrestlemania aren’t just there to leech off the fame. They helped create it. Because while we wrestling fans remember Steamboat beating Savage, Warrior retiring Savage, and Bret Hart losing to Owen, they didn’t solely create the mythos. Hulk Hogan by himself did not make Wrestlemania what is it today. Neither did Vince, by himself. All those celebrities at first helped set the stage. They dragged WM into the spotlight, until it could stand on its own two feet. Then, when Wrestlemania began to falter, you could tell that things were bad since none showed up. But then, in their darkest hour, one celeb came in and helped turn the corner. And now, it seems they are back in command.

But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Let’s take this one show at a time, shall we?

Debut- WrestleMania I: I pity the fool who doesn’t understand why these celebs were so important.

As a rule, celebs (when they turn up) fall into 2 main groups, not counting those merely there as fans. The inoffensive/unimportant, and the important. You get the occasional rare case that doesn’t really fit into either group, but for the most part, it’s easy to split.

After all, while Liberace, The Rockettes, Billy Martin and Muhammad Ali were all talented and famous (well, maybe not Billy Martin), their roles were small (Guest Time Keeper, Guest Time Keeper’s Friends, Guest Announcer and Guest Outside Ref respectively) and they were more background sparkle to the main ones. And at WM1, there’s 2 main celebs who helped set the whole thing up, both arguably as important as each other.

The Women’s Title match saw Wendi Richter fight to win back her WWF Women’s title off the evil Leilani Kai. Thing was, Kai had the Fabulous Moolah in her corner, while Wendi had Cyndi Lauper. Lauper had come in to stop Captain Lou Albano’s bitching about he made Cyndi, and that lead to Cyndi agreeing to help Wendi. Simple enough. But this got HUGE press, with MTV and various other news companies all over it, it was major major news, and Cyndi helping Wendi win the title was a big moment for the company, as the Rock n Wrestling Connection began to swing.

This was also helped by the main event. For while they had all their guest stars on the outside, they had one in the ring as well. Hulk Hogan was, as usual, having problems with Roddy Piper and his buddies, Mr. Wonderful Paul Orndorff and Bob Orton. He had Jimmy Snuka, but he needed another, a man to stand with him in the ring, and Mr. T was that man, as he had run into the ring to help Hulk after Piper et al had attacked him and Cyndi Lauper. Hulk and Mr. T won that night, taking advantage of Orton’s mistake. But the bigger effect was the success of the event, helped by all the celeb involvement to hook both fan, casual fan and non-fan alike, boosting the event from a mere big event to THE Big Event.

Of course, the impact wasn’t immediate, and the second time around the involvement of celebs was bigger, and yet less.

Phase 2- WrestleMania 2: 3 Arenas, 21 Celebs, 1 Bad Idea.

To be fair, it probably seemed a good idea at the time. WM1 was so big, WM2 was even bigger, you had to have it in three places!

And upping the number of celebrities also seemed like a good idea, since it worked so well the last time. But it merely diluted it, as all the celebs had small, unimportant roles.

Ray Charles played ‘America The Beautiful’ before the show.
Susan Saint James as the special announcer in New York.
Cathy Lee Crosby as the special announcer in Chicago.
Elvira as the special announcer in Los Angeles.
Joan Rivers and Tommy Lasorda as guest ring announcers in NY and LA respectively.
Herb, Clara Peller, and Ricky Schroder as NY’s, Chicago and LA’s time keepers.
Jimbo Covert, Harvey Martin, Ernie Holmes, Bill Fralic, Russ Francis, and William “Refrigerator” Perry as football players for a battle royal, with Dick Butkus and Ed “Too Tall” Jones as special refs on the outside.

The fact that you’ve probably never heard of most of these guys is proof of how important they were at the time. The effect was meant to be star studded, but the stars were mostly made of glass, so while WM2 wasn’t sold solely on these guys, it didn’t help that they didn’t pull their weight.

The only possible high spot was Mr. T’s return for a boxing match against Roddy Piper, with Joe Frazer in T’s corner and Lou Duva in Piper’s, the match being somewhat fun but not nearly as well received or successful as the last one.

So it was clear that overloading on the guests was not a good way to go. So, next time round, they were used a lot more sparingly.

Phase 3- WrestleMania III: Who needs Celebs when you got this sort of action?

But they were used much more effectively. They weren’t shoved down your throat, and they weren’t stuck everywhere you could think of. They were in logical places where it helped the show, but not overpower it. Aretha Franklin gave a moving performance of America The Beautiful (while it might be slightly repetitive, WWE could probably make a few bucks putting all the renditions of the song from WM on Itunes…), Alice Cooper came to the ring with Jake Roberts and got some revenge for him by sicking Damien on Jimmy Hart after Honky Tonk Man cheated to win, and for the main event, Bob Uecker, as guest ring announcer and as special time keeper, Mary Hart.

And that was it. No matches, no over the top number of celebs, but a few in the right places to add to the special air, not that 93000 in one place wasn’t special enough. But it did set the tone for a few years, since WM2 was overloaded, the reigns were pulled back a bit.

Phase 4- WrestleMania IV: The Show That Never Ends…

Being at Trump Plaza, you expected a touch of Mr. Trump. And he was at ringside with his wife, but he stayed out of it. Instead, he let Gladys Knight sing ‘America The Beautiful’ (hereafter referred to as ‘that song’ in this column), Robin Leach run the tournament and Bob Uecker do the main event ring announcing (and some backstage interviewing, which lead to him getting choked out by Andre The Giant in a memorable moment), Vanna White accompanying him to ringside. Thus, Trump got a great view of Randy Savage cheating to beat Ted DiBiase (well, Hulk was the one that cheated, but still) and claim the WWF World title.

Of course, not every celeb’s interaction is on screen. Donald must have made such an impression that the following year, they were back again in the same place.

Phase 5- WrestleMania V: Fire in the hole!

Run DMC performed at the show, but not singing That Song, rather a Wrestlemania Rap. But that’s not the moment people remember from this WM. This WM had Morton Downey Jr. get sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. Morton was the 80’s equivalent of Rush Limbaugh and Howard Stern rolled up, so at the time seeing him get his comeuppance for many was a great thing to watch. But nowadays, people just ask if he’s related to that actor dude.

Next year’s show didn’t even have that going for it.

Phase 6- WrestleMania VI: Steve Allen before PTC.

Downey Jr. was at least entertaining to see. And sure, Robert Goulet did a great job singing ‘O Canada’. But Steve Allen’s moment with The Bolsheviks was funny but not really funny, and Rona Barrett was just… there as a guest interviewer.

This was about the point, roughly, when the business started its downturn ever so slightly. It was still popular, but the WWF wasn’t what it once was. And yet, the next year saw a few more celebs in the building, albeit not the first one.

Phase 7-WrestleMania VII: Regis Philbin, Alex Trebek and Marla Maples. Now that’s a weird threesome!

*waits for that image to go away*

Sorry about that.

There were more celebs at the seventh Wrestlemania, but they were mostly in the crowd. Regis, Alex and Marla were actually on camera as personalities, doing the usual things non-physically gifted celebs did at Wrestlemania, interview people and be guest announcers. And, not surprisingly, they were good at it, Alex and Regis both being seasoned pros talking to a camera and Marla being pretty hot.

However, this brief high point seemed to be a last hurrah for Celebs at WrestleMania, as next year there was a mere one.

Phase 8- WrestleMania VIII: Insert Heenan Joke Here.

And it was, of course, That Song, as performed by Reba McIntyre. And sure, she was good at it, but the show seemed to run well enough without any celeb involvement, so they thought that maybe they could get away without them from now on. If only one worked, then surely the next show would be great even without any, right?

The next show was WrestleMania IX.

So you can’t blame the WWF for overcompensating, right?

Phase 9- WrestleMania X: Sure, just a coincidence…

And low and behold, you loaded up on the celebs, and suddenly the show was great again! Of course, you can argue it was not cause and effect. But there were more celebs running around this time round, with Little Richard singing That Song, the president of Hair Club For Men revealing Howard Finkel’s new hair (which sadly didn’t last long, since if it did he’d still be on air today), while Donnie Wahlberg was the guest ring announcer and Rhonda Shear was the guest timekeeper for the first WWF title match of Luger V Yoko, and then for the second one (Yoko V Bret) you had Jennie Garth as the time keeper and Burt Reynolds as the guest ring announcer. And they all did their jobs fairly well, and stayed out of trouble.

But the next time round, there was trouble. Lots of trouble.

Phase 10- WrestleMania XI: It’s that guy from Vice City!

Everyone remembers the main event. Lawrence Taylor, renowned football player and all round controversial figure, was ringside at the Royal Rumble and got into a brawl with Bam Bam Bigelow. Bam Bam then arrogantly challenged the defensive linebacker to a match. To his slight shock, LT accepted. Their match was widely covered and reported, and was the main event of the evening, with LT, along with his buddies Ken Norton, Jr., Carl Banks, Rickey Jackson, Steve McMichael, Reggie White, and Chris Spielman to counter the Million Dollar Corporation and Salt-N-Pepa to sing him down to the ring, LT shocked the world by NAILING Bam Bam with a flying forearm and winning the match. Everyone remembers that.

Not too many people remember Jonathan Taylor Thomas doing timekeeping for the WWF title match, nor NYPD Blue’s Nicholas Turturro doing backstage interviews and ring announcing for the same match.

But in-between the two sit two women whose presence seems to have been forgotten, oddly enough. Pamela Anderson had been at the Royal Rumble to congratulate/pose with/(insert sexual innuendo here) the winner of the match, which turned out to be Shawn Michaels, and she was meant to come out with them at WM as well. But on the night, Pam was missing and ended up coming out with Diesel, the champ instead. What’s a Sexy Boy to do? Why, ‘upgrade’ to the new hot young blonde thing, Jenny McCarthy.

Sadly the two did not get into an ECW style cat fight, or even any sort of brawling, which is a shame, since if there was ever two women at the time you wanted to see like that…

But oddly enough, this would be the last celebrity involvement with Wrestlemania for a few years. Perhaps the publicity of having a football player beat a wrestler didn’t make up for the fact that a football player had beaten one of his wrestlers. Perhaps the fact that the WWF was now firmly on a downward trajectory meant that no-one wanted to be involved with them. No matter, it ended up helping the WWF. It gave them some time away from the spotlight to reinvent themselves, and a mere three years later they would bring in a celebrity or three, and this time, it sure as hell helped out, all of them.

Phase 11- WrestleMania XIV: TYSON! TYSON! TYSON! RIGHT HAND! DOWN GOES MICHAELS!

The ‘start’ of the Attitude era saw three celebrities all have major impacts, albeit of various quality.

Gennifer Flowers, she who Bill Clinton did, merely interviewed The Rock earlier in the day. This would have been uneventful, had she not been the very first person to ever be asked if they could smell what The Rock was cooking, so it’s of historical importance.

Secondly, Pete Rose began a tradition, as he came out to guest ring announce the Kane/Undertaker match, but sadly spent too long insulting the Boston crowd, and thus Kane, who was itching to beat his brother, came out and Tombstoned Pete, which oddly enough got a huge positive reaction for the hated masked man.

But these both pale in comparison to the big name. Mike Tyson, the controversial boxer and bad man, was brought in to be the guest enforcer for the Austin/Michaels main event WWF title match. But a couple weeks before the show, he joined DX, which caused what was already a media circus in a firestorm.

The image of him counting the pinfall and then laying out Shawn Michaels, putting him out for over 4 years, solidified Steve Austin’s rise to the top, and was the launching pad for the WWF resurgence and the whole ‘Attitude’ era.

Not bad for one punch.

Phase 12- WrestleMania XV: Bart Gunn meets Butterbean’s right. He then goes to sleep.

The next year featured a couple more celebs, most involved in a Brawl For All match. Bart Gunn had shockingly won the Brawl For All tournament, and thus was feeling pretty damm good about himself. So good that he challenged Butterbean, a huge bear of a man to a match. Butterbean accepted, and with Vinny Paz as the ref and 3 judges (Gorilla Monsoon, Chuck Wepner, and Kevin Rooney) at ringside to judge the match if it came to points, Butterbean took Bart’s block off, knocking him out with a straight right haymaker within the first 40 seconds.

Apart from that brief moment, the only other celeb involvement was with That Song being performed by Boyz-To-Men, and Kane, by now someone the fans liked but also disliked due to his being forced to be in the Corporation, being attacked before his match by the San Diego Chicken, who was unmasked as Pete Rose, looking for revenge. All he got was another tombstone.

Phase 13- WrestleMania 2000: Pete Rose’s Swansong.

Sadly Pete’s third attempt the following year would be his last, as he got someone to dress up as the San Diego Chicken, come out and dance with Too Cool (who had come out to celebrate Rikishi, their buddy, and Kane’s win) and then, when Kane went after the Chicken, Pete attacked with a bat, only to get caught, chokeslammed and then stinkfaced. This would be the last time Pete was involved in some form at a Wrestlemania, outside of his Hall Of Fame induction. (Although it would have been awesome if he had come out next year after Kane had won the Hardcore title, beaten Kane over the head and won the belt, even if he would then lose it immediately to someone). Ice T was also at the show, becoming the first in a series of artists to play someone to the ring, Ice rapping the Godfather’s music as he and Apprentice Pimp D’Lo Brown came to the ring for their tag match, which they would end up losing.

Phase 14- WrestleMania X-Seven: HHH lives a dream.

And then came Motörhead. HHH, a lifelong fan of the group, had theme music by the group. So, natrually, when he was about to fight The Undertaker at Wrestlemania, a huge uphill battle, he needed all the motivation he could get. So he got Motörhead to play his theme music live. It didn’t help him in the end, but it was somewhat cool. So cool, that a year later they doubled it.

Phase 15- WrestleMania X8: HHH lives another dream.

Both Drowning Pool and Saliva played live at the 18th Wrestlemania, since clearly Motörhead worked so well, 2 bands would be twice as good. But both bands’ performances were a little flat, and while HHH seemed to enjoy Drowning Pool playing him to the ring, it wasn’t as special the second time around.

So, oddly, they tried AGAIN, just with a different guy.

Phase 16- WrestleMania XIX: Seriously, the Miller Lite Catfight Girls???

Limp Bizkit, instead of playing at Wrestlemania 17, where it might have made some sense, played 19 instead, providing both the main theme and playing The Undertaker to ringside for his handicap match, Taker going back to ‘Rolling’ despite not using it for a while. Ashanti did a decent job singing That Song, but then came the worst celeb involvement since WM2, and the Miller Lite Catfight Girls, who fought Torrie Wilson and Stacy Keibler in a pillow fight, leading to someone get their pants pulled down.

Unfortunately, that was Jonathon Coachman.

Phase 17- WrestleMania XX: Foreshadowing.

Wrestlemania XX will be remembered for many things, little to no celeb involvement being one a fair way down the list. But a minor issue was Jesse Ventura, fresh from being inducted into the WWE Hall Of Fame, interviewing Donald Trump who was at ringside. While the interview was fairly bland and uninteresting, it did re-introduce Trump into the WWE, reminding everyone of their history. This would become important a little while later, of course.

Phase 18- WrestleMania 21: Once more, but maybe with the RIGHT words?

HHH again had Motörhead on his side to play him to the ring, and once again it failed to work, as HHH lost his World Title to Batista. However, the ‘main’ celebrity at the show was Akebono, a huge star in Japan, a former Sumo Wrestling Yokozuna, the first non-Japanese born onein history, being a Hawaiian native. Akebono had teamed with Big Show in Japan during a WWE tour, and then he challenged Big Show to the match. Big Show accepted and was then beaten. Could this be a sign of things to come?

Phase 19- WrestleMania 22: Back to the music.

WM22 featured Michelle Williams singing That Song and P.O.D. proving that maybe all HHH was missing was a rap beat, as they played Rey Mysterio to the ring, Rey then winning the World Heavyweight Title from Kurt Angle by pinning Randy Orton.

Phase 20- WrestleMania 23: Celebs Retake The Main Event.

WM23 was in some parts a homage to the 3rd WrestleMania. Kane bodyslammed Khali, and more relevantly, Aretha Franklin sang That Song once again. But while in some respects the night was nostalgic, it was also in many ways not, as the ‘true’ main event was not about the World title, but about hair (although that was in some ways nostalgic as there was a Hair V Hair match at WM3).

It was the Battle Of The Billionaires, as IC champion Umaga fought ECW Champion Bobby Lashley. Umaga was fighting for Vince McMahon’s hair, and Bobby for Donald Trump’s hair. Steve Austin was the guest ref, Tara Conner was the eye candy, the whole thing was a car wreck in a good way. Even if Donald clearly has never thrown a punch in his life. But he got the last laugh, Bobby pinning Umaga and then helping Donald shave Vince’s head bald.

Today- WrestleMania XXIV: Celebs tend to win. But it’s still a huge uphill battle.

In a couple of days, another Wrestlemania will be upon us. And it’s set to be a huge event, both in terms of the normal, in ring stuff (Cena/HHH/Orton! Edge/Taker! STEVIE RICHARDS FOR ECW CHAMP!) and, more importantly, the celebs, all leading to the main event.

Kim Kardashian will be the guest hostess (whatever that means). John Legend will sing That Song. Raven-Symone will probably end up being a guest ring announcer or backstage interviewer of just wacky comedy segment participant (although if she touches something and then sees Taker and/or Cena winning the main event I’ll be a happy camper). Snoop Dogg will be the Master Of Ceremonies for the Bunnymania match.

But the main event, the match the card is really being sold on, is the Boxer V Wrestler match, as Big Show, all 7 foot 400+ pounds of him, will fight Floyd Mayweather, Jr., the 147 pound boxer. Even with 50 Cent (a rapper) playing him to the ring, even with the history of celebs in WM matches, even with Big Show’s history in celeb matches… It’s still a hell of a challenge. Can he do it, or will the obnoxious little squirt get what’s coming to him? We can only wait and see.

Conclusion.

So, in the end, what have we learnt? That Wrestlemania attracts celebs? That celebs helped build Wrestlemania? That if you’re gonna have someone play you to the ring, for goodness’ sake make sure they are rappers? That hot chicks are always welcome?

All this is true, but the main point is clearer. WrestleMania, thanks to in part some celebs, has become THE wrestling event in both our, and non-fans eyes. It’s the one time you can discuss a wrestling show and be confident you won’t get looked down upon, much. It’s the show that the world, if ever they truly stop to watch wrestling, is the show they watch. It’s the time when we maybe, just maybe, get some acceptance and maybe even a smidgen of respect.

In other words, it’s the show that keeps us accepted as normal people. And the celebs are a major part of that. So next time you bitch that some stupid little segment took away a few minutes from the MITB match or some such, just pause and realise that without that little segment, the WWE and thus all of us, are a lot less mainstream.

And while that’s not automatically a bad thing, it’s still a positive.

But there’s still no excuse for those stupid Catfight Girls.