The Wrestling News Experience: 03.24.08
Posted by Stephen Randle on 03.24.2008
It's the final week before WrestleMania, and we've got Ric Flair's retirement plans, a possible focus change for Katie Lea, and the chances that you might get wet at WrestleMania. All this, plus a Raw preview, and the first time I've ever brought something back by actual popular demand!
Good morning everyone, and welcome to the Experience. I am Stephen Randle, proud owner of two tickets to the first Raw in Toronto in over two years. They would have been floor seats, but Ticketmaster decided to be a little bitch and released my tickets while refusing to accept my credit card info. Sigh. Anyway, they're still good seats, and I suppose I'll have to think of some way to amuse myself at 411 readers' expense while I'm there. Maybe another contest, although I gave away a Chris Benoit DVD last time and look what happened to him. I'll think on it.
And 411 is hiring new writers again, which you can check out by following this link. Every time they put a hiring announcement up, I get asked to post advice for people looking to apply, and I usually make a long post about it that nobody reads, so here's the short version:
1. Spell check everything.
2. Don't suck.
Seriously, those are the two important points, and the two points that 95% of submissions I've personally seen over nearly five year ultimately fail at. And before you ask "how will I know if it sucks?", trust me, you'll know.
Four points out, six to play. It ain't over until it's over.
Moving on.
What's On Tap - WWE Raw for March 24th
It's the very last Raw before WrestleMania 24, and with the matchups all set to go, the only question left is who will go into the biggest show of the year with all the momentum on their side?
And speaking of the Big Show, will he have another message for Floyd Mayweather this week, and how will the fans respond to both men this week?
Plus, Triple H got the upper hand last week, but for the final week before Mania, everyone's back on an even playing field, and it remains to be seen who, if anyone, will be standing tall as Raw goes off the air.
In addition, will Jerry Lawler get revenge for the loss of his delicious Subway sandwich? Only time and tonight's show will tell!
Around The Horn
In sad news for those who grew up during the days of World Class Championship Wrestling, former wrestling manager Gary Hart passed away last week. Hart was known for managing some of the biggest stars in WCCW history on their rises to fame, and was considered one of the best managers in pro wrestling at the time. All of us here at the Experience offer our condolences to Hart's family and friends.
Moving on to Ric Flair's plans post-retirement, as apparently, he'll be off TV in an ambassador role (probably directed towards capturing the female demographic…after all, he's Ric Flair), and then possibly brought back on TV in a non-wrestling role. Ironically, Flair was initially brought into WWE back in 2001 in an entirely non-wrestling figurehead role, and look where we are seven years later. Personally, I'll believe Flair's entirely retired from in-ring action when I see his grave, because that's what it'll probably end up requiring.
The news for the upcoming WWE Vengeance PPV is that it will, once again, feature a card built around the "Night of Champions" concept, with every active belt in WWE on the line on the show. I wonder if they'll remember that the major perceived flaw in the entire show last year was that, despite a grand total of nine titles being on the line, only one belt actually changed hands. Ah well, at least they don't have to worry about squeezing a Cruiserweight title match on the card this time.
Apparently He Who Shall Not Be Named is may be slowly making his way back into WWE's video archives, albeit not in any featured segments, as he is mentioned on the Triple H DVD, and also shows up in some WWE 24/7 footage this month. By this time next year, they might even mention that MVP won the United States title from him. Because MVP will likely still have the United States title.
In response to my idle question last week, apparently we've gone and discovered that weather reports are predicting a 60% chance of precipitation at the Citrus Bowl on the day of WrestleMania, dropping to 10% in the evening. Of course, in my experience, weather predictors can barely get tomorrow's weather correct, but I get the feeling that Florida's weather is a little more stable and repetitive than it is up here in Waterloo, where it is rumoured that Ian Malcolm studied his chaos theory as it relates to weather patterns.
Konnan, voted 411's Manager of the Year for 2007, is apparently suing TNA, citing racial discrimination, and failure to pay for his recent surgeries, where he was forced to rely on the incredible generosity of wrestling fans to donate money (and body parts) for the procedures. He also apparently alleges that TNA management takes drugs. Well, I mean, we were already pretty sure of the TNA creative team anyway, but it's nice to get confirmation. And hey, in an ironic switch, it's an athlete accusing management of taking illegal drugs. TNA truly is Bizzaro Land.
Rumours are floating around that Katie Lea may be changing her role in the near future, focussing more on actually wrestling than being Paul Burchill's valet. What, because after putting Burchill out there for a couple squash matches, then pulling him back off TV for a bit before making him one of the guys pinned by Cena and Orton last week turned out to be the wrong way to debut a hot new wrestling couple? Who could have seen that coming?
In Case You Missed It
This week, Smackdown was full of handicap matches that didn't seem to inconvenience the man being handicapped, while Impact was full of outside interference and distractions and Raw featured John Cena and Randy Orton nearly successfully plowing through the entire undercard. When ECW is becoming the bastion of decent wrestling with clean finishes, what kind of world do we live in?
WWE Raw - March 17th
Match Results
- CM Punk defeated Carlito (pinfall, Go 2 Sleep)
- Umaga defeated Brian Kendrick and Paul London (Umaga pinned London, Samoan Spike)
- JBL defeated "The Second-Toughest Irishman in WWE" Colin Delaney (pinfall, Clothesline from Hell)
- Ric Flair defeated Vince McMahon in a Street Fight (pinfall, top rope splash through a table…I know, just run with it)
- Candice Michelle and Maria defeated Jillian Hall and Victoria (Candice pinned Jillian, Candy Wrapper)
- The Big Show defeated Chris Jericho (DQ, Jericho hit Show with his title belt)
- Randy Orton and John Cena technically defeated the entire Raw roster…well, most of it,anyway (DQ, everyone runs in after Cena and Orton pinned half their opponents)
Notes
- Brian Kendrick abandoned his partner, Paul London, to be pinned by Umaga for no reason in particular
- JBL made many racially motivated comments towards Finlay, but this time, stopped short of goose-stepping around the ring.
- Shawn Michaels interfered in the Ric Flair-Vince McMahon match despite Flair forbidding him from doing so. Intrigue~!
- Santino Marella stole Jerry Lawler's delicious Subway sandwich and ate it. Now that is some quality evil.
- After the Jericho-Show match, Show knocked Jericho out with a straight right hand.
- Triple H gave Orton and Cena Pedigrees after their match. I'm as shocked as you are.
ECW on Sci Fi - March 18th
Match Results
- Kane defeated Elijah Burke (pinfall, chokeslam)
- Kofi Kingston defeated James Curtis (pinfall, Jamaican Buzzsaw)
- CM Punk, Jesse, and Festus defeated John Morrison, The Miz, and Shelton Benjamin (Festus pinned Miz, Flapjack Slam)
- Chavo Guerrero defeated Colin Delaney (pinfall, Gory Bomb)
Notes
- Mark Henry and Big Daddy V were added to the 24-man Battle Royal for an ECW Title match at WrestleMania
- By defeating Colin Delaney, Chavo denied Delaney a chance at an ECW contract
TNA Impact! - March 20th
Match Results
- Scott Steiner and Petey Williams defeated Kaz and Eric Young (Steiner pinned Young, Super Samoan Drop following Monster-ference)
- Tomko defeated Rhino (pinfall, clothesline following AJ-ference)
- Sonjay Dutt defeated Homicide to earn a spot in the Xscape Match at Lockdown (pinfall, rollup following Dutt's Oscar-nominated "Best Performance of a Fake Injury")
- Booker T defeated AJ Styles (pinfall, rollup following valet-related distractions)
- ODB and Gail Kim defeated Velvet Sky and Angelina Love (ODB pinned Sky, running powerslam)
- Christian Cage and Rhino defeated Team 3D (DQ, Tomko-ference)
Notes
- Booker T and Sharmell vs Robert Roode and Ms Banks was announced for Lockdown
- Rhino joined Christian Cage's team for the Lethal Lockdown match at Lockdown
- AJ Styles brought out Karen Angle as his special guest for his match with Booker T
- Kurt Angle had a demonstration workout against 4 men, showcasing his "MMA style". He handily defeated all four opponents.
- Sting's music played as Impact went off the air, and it was announced that he will return on this week's live edition of Impact
WWE Smackdown - March 21st
Match Results
- Batista defeated Deuce and Domino in a handicap match (Batista pinned Domino, Batista Bomb)
- Big Show defeated former TNA Tag Champions Andy Douglas and Chase Stevens, and "Altar Boy" Luke Hawx in a 3-on-1 handicap match (Show pinned Douglas, KO punch)
- Edge defeated Funaki (pinfall, Tombstone)
- Kane and Chuck Palumbo went to a No Contest (Khali and Henry-ference)
- John Morrison and The Miz defeated Jesse and Festus to retain the WWE Tag Team titles (Miz pinned Jesse, Reality Check)
- Undertaker defeated Chavo Guerrero (submission, gogoplata)
Notes
- After losing to Michelle McCool in an arm-wrestling exhibition, Victoria was revealed as the next Diva voted off the Smackdown Diva Competition
- Edge and the Edgeheads attacked Undertaker following his match and laid him out with a Con-chair-to
- After the show, Vicki Guerrero announced a Chris Jericho vs MVP match for this week's Smackdown
The Injury Bug Bites
Inactive List as of 03.10.08
Well, by popular demand, here we go again. I'd still like to rework it a bit, but can't figure out how. Any ideas?
WWE
- Gregory Helms, SD!, out one year as of May 17th (neck surgery)
- Kenny Dykstra, SD!, out indefinitely as of January 18th (knee)
- Jeff Hardy, RAW, out 60 days as of March 4th (Wellness suspension)
- Matt Hardy, SD!, out 1-3 months as of November 20th (appendix)
- Rey Mysterio, SD!, out 6-9 months (or maybe weeks) as of February 21 (torn bicep)
- Rory McAllister, RAW, out indefinitely as of February 12th (torn pectoral)
- The Boogeyman, ECW, out indefinitely (calf)
- Torrie Wilson, SD!, out indefinitely as of December 1st (back)
TNA
- Abyss, TNA, out indefinitely (kayfabe)
Transactions
- Candice Michelle, RAW, working through injury (shoulder)
- Sting, TNA, will make return on this week's live Impact!
Who's Holding Gold
I'm also working on modifying this feature to make it less list-like while still providing useful information. Again, any ideas are welcome.
WWE
WWE Champion: Randy Orton
- 169 day reign, defeated Triple H in a Last Man Standing match on October 7th (No Mercy PPV)
- Next title defense: vs Triple H and John Cena, Triple Threat Match, WrestleMania 24
World Heavyweight Champion: Edge
- 99 day reign, defeated Batista in a Triple Threat match on December 16th (Armageddon PPV), also involving the Undertaker
- Next title defense: vs The Undertaker, WrestleMania 24
ECW World Champion: Chavo Guerrero
- 62 day reign, defeated CM Punk on January 22nd (ECW on SciFi)
- Next title defense: vs Winner of 24-man Battle Royal, WrestleMania 24
WWE Intercontinental Champion: Chris Jericho
- 14 day reign, defeated Jeff Hardy on March 10th (Raw)
WWE United States Champion: MVP
- 309 day reign, defeated Chris Benoit in a 2/3 Falls match on May 20th (Judgment Day PPV)
World Tag Team Champions: Cody Rhodes and Hardcore Holly
- 106 day title reign, defeated Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch on December 10th (Raw XV special)
WWE Tag Team Champions: John Morrison and The Miz
- 128 day reign, defeated MVP and Matt Hardy on November 16th (Smackdown)
WWE Women's Champion: Beth Phoenix
- 169 day reign, defeated Candice Michelle on October 7th (No Mercy PPV)
TNA
TNA Heavyweight Champion: Kurt Angle
- 151 day reign, defeated Sting on October 25th (Impact)
- Next title defense: vs Samoa Joe, Lockdown PPV
TNA Tag Team Champions: AJ Styles and Tomko
- 162 day reign, defeated Team Pacman on October 14th (Bound For Glory PPV)
TNA X-Division Champion: "Black Machismo" Jay Lethal
- 43 day reign, defeated Johnny Devine in a Hardcore Street Fight match on February 10th (Against All Odds PPV), also involving Team 3-D and the Motor City Machine Guns
- Next title defense: vs Curry Man, Sonjay Dutt, and two others, Xscape Match, Lockdown PPV
TNA Knockouts Champion: Awesome Kong
- 74 day reign, defeated Gail Kim on January 10th (Impact)
Links For Fun And Nonprofit
We got an exclusive interview with WWE's Melina!!!! Slowly but surely, we're becoming semi-legitimate wrestling journalists!
Okay, well, as you've already noticed, due to overwhelming response from the readers (and Larry, who secretly envies my column's popularity…well, not so secretly, actually), the Injury Bug Bites are here to stay. I can honestly say I was shocked that people are so passionate about the presence of that feature.
Thanks to MC42, who dug up these fun facts about the United States title:
Longest U.S. title reign, counting WCW and NWA, is Lex Luger's 523 day reign in
1989/90. Second is Rick Rude with 378 in 1991/92, third is Nikita Koloff with
328 in 1986/87. MVP is fourth.
Well, now you know. Everyone who said "and knowing is half the battle", award yourself ten points.
And One To Go On
411 will have live coverage of Raw tonight starting at 9 pm EDT. Larry's in tomorrow, I'll be back next week with a very special post-Mania edition of the Experience, including, finally, my thoughts on the exclusively released in Canada autobiography of one of Canada's greatest wrestlers, Bret "Hitman" Hart. You won't want to miss it.
Geez, the book came out four months ago, and you're just reviewing it now?
I had to read it several times, Larry.
This is why you never get to review anything that you don't buy yourself.
That's probably true.
Hey, can I borrow it if you're finished? They still don't sell it in America.
Yet another reason why Canada is the much superior country. Besides, you already got to interview Melina this week. I'd say we're even.
I suppose the only ideas i can give to your "Injury Bug" and
"Whos holding the gold" is to add Small-like graphics for
everything... Like a picture of the belt with a counter on it or something like
that...
I really have no idea
Posted By: Brad (Guest) on March 24, 2008 at 02:40 AM
Lists are fun!!!
Posted By: Matt P (Guest) on March 24, 2008 at 02:52 AM
to the Injury list, you should add the YEAR...
youy had Jerichoi like 2 years and somthimes he got shuffled
Posted By: Pepo (Guest) on March 24, 2008 at 03:09 AM
still, great column, as always...
VINTAGE RANDLE!!!
Posted By: Pepo (Guest) on March 24, 2008 at 03:11 AM
Awesome, I'll be at RAW too. It would of been better if we got Smackdown or
better yet a Supershow this year, just to mix things up. Hopefully we get
another SNME taping, so we can see Edge.
Posted By: Guest#2188 (Guest) on March 24, 2008 at 04:06 AM
In addition to adding years, perhaps adding a projected return time for those
not out indefinately? Like Helms would be expected back around May 17th this
year and Matt would be December 20 to February 20. Of course, looking at
Matt's projected return is the obvious sign of what might be wrong with that
but I don't think anyone expected them to toss the obvious feel good match for
Mania 24 with Matt beating MVP for the title. Oh well.
Also, make it a TNA DVD for your next contest.
Posted By: MC42 (Guest) on March 24, 2008 at 05:14 AM
How about on the "Who's Holding Gold?" feature, as a way to add a
personal touch, list your prediction of who will take the title next, and
approximately when. I think that would be neat.
Posted By: SeanAltly (Registered) on March 24, 2008 at 06:39 AM
'nuther solid column.
Posted By: reginaldo (Guest) on March 24, 2008 at 09:26 AM
Maybe you should add ROH or popular Indy guys on the injury list
Posted By: Vincent Chiucchi (Registered) on March 24, 2008 at 10:23 AM
Ashley Massaro should be on the injury list. Wrist sprain/fracture.
Posted By: stan (Guest) on March 24, 2008 at 11:10 AM
Good article. Not sure how to improve the IBB and WHG features but they are
still fun to read. Thanks for the Talk With Larry! Thats always good for a
luagh!!
Posted By: SaveECW222 (Guest) on March 24, 2008 at 11:27 AM
You are so insecure, you wont accept any of my negative feedback. Grow some
balls.
Posted By: Loser (Guest) on March 24, 2008 at 12:30 PM
For the "Injury Bug" you could always put approximately how long
they've been out of action. As for the "Who's Holding Gold", why not
keep track of their TV and PPV title defenses?
Posted By: Guest#8475 (Guest) on March 24, 2008 at 01:21 PM
Man.. I've been reading this website for *years* and would love to write for it.
But not having cable or definite internet throws a wrench into it all. And like
you Randle, I have a degree in English.
Funny you metnion the weather. I am in Florida and know about the comparisons
to Waterloo. It is just as bizarre in both places - only FL has no snow.
The other comments have good suggestions. Maybe you could go a little into the
fan booking and talk about what led those wrestlers to hold the gold or get
injured and then the next title defense or what they might do when they return.
But I imagine this will greatly change the length of your column so...IDK.
Posted By: MystikCode (Registered) on March 24, 2008 at 02:35 PM
As a note, the last Raw taping in Toronto was last year, not 2 years ago. It was
May 27, a dual Raw/SNME taping. I was there, but didn't get tickets for this
year's.
And Randle, Ottawa is better!
Posted By: quattre777 (Guest) on March 24, 2008 at 03:56 PM
Hey gotta love the 6-1-3, quattre. How'd you like the hockey game on Saturday?
Posted By: Lou in K-Town (Guest) on March 24, 2008 at 05:45 PM
I agree with WHG to start listing the title defenses (like the ROH website does
with their title holders). Awesome idea. With the injury bug, list which match
and who the opponent was that they were injured in coz sometimes they get the
injured list but don't know/remember who put them there
Posted By: Derek (Guest) on March 25, 2008 at 10:02 AM
Oh, I forgot to add, I think for the Who's Holding Gold, possibly putting the
number of times they've defended the belt in addition to the number of days
they've held the belt. Everyone always talks about the lack of title defenses
for the US Title and IC Title, at least we can see how many they are. Maybe
also adding the last person they beat. I think the list type is fine.
And Lou, I live in Toronto, so I can't actually watch Senators games. Until the
Leafs shape up, I'm not caring about them. At least Randle made sense when he
said Canada was superior. :)
Posted By: quattre777 (Guest) on March 28, 2008 at 07:20 PM
