Don’t Think Twice 07.05.08: The Business of Being a Fan

Posted by Scott Slimmer on 07.05.2008

Last Sunday, WWE made it perfectly clear to me that they do not respect or value me as a customer. But now I have to come to terms with what that means for me as a fan.

Life is what happens to you
While you're busy making other plans
– Beautiful Boy by John Lennon

I had a plan. Really, I had a plan. Some time after I agreed to start writing a weekly column, I received a rather amusing little private message from Larry. It said simply, "BTW, I forgot dude, what the hell is the concept of the column?…lol" It took me a moment to decide if I was flattered or alarmed that Larry would agree to give me a column without having the slightest inkling what it was going to be about. Now in his defense, it's not like you can infer all that much from the title, Don't Think Twice. But I had been asking myself the same question ever since agreeing to write the column, and luckily I had come to at least a vague, meandering conclusion by the time Larry became curious. And so I replied to Larry's message, explained the basic premise of the column, and even gave him a rough outline of the first two months' worth of columns.

The first week I wanted to talk about Heat. It only seemed fitting to begin my new career here at 411 by saying goodbye to my old one. The second week would coincide with the one year anniversary of the death of Chris Benoit, and I still felt I had more to say on that subject as well. But the third week was supposed to be the true introduction to Don't Think Twice. I wanted to devote an entire week to explaining why I had agreed to write this column and what I hope to achieve in the process. I went on from there and outlined three or four more weeks' worth of columns, and I hoped that would be enough to give Larry an inkling of what was to come. So yeah, like I said, I had a plan. This was supposed to be the introduction to Don't Think Twice. But as John Lennon so eloquently sung, life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans. Well life happened to me this week. And it pissed the hell outta me. So the introduction will have to wait until next week. I think we need to take a little detour first.

In addition to writing Don't Think Twice, I also edit 411's Instant Access for all WWE pay-per-views. I'll be the first to admit that as a reviewer I'll never have the credibility of a Dave Meltzer or a Scott Keith or a Larry Csonka or a J.D. Dunn. I'm not even in their league. But all the same, it's still fun to throw my two cents into the mix. Last Sunday was WWE Night of Champions, and as usual I was anticipating an exciting yet hectic evening. During the show, not only do I have to write my own comments for each match, but I also have to assemble the comments from three other writers. Oh, and I usually spend an absolutely inexcusable amount of time chatting with Small in gmail. True, the two of us share a sense of humor that most fourth graders would find juvenile, but we keep ourselves entertained. And Small knows that he can make jokes about Cade & Murdoch's old self-play-by-play gimmick, because I'm probably the only other guy on the planet that will understand them. The bottom line is that during an average WWE pay-per-view I spend three straight hours typing, but it's a sort of manic frenzy that I've come to enjoy. However, if you read the Instant Access for Night of Champions, then you'll know that things didn't exactly go according to plan that night. Life happened instead.

I watch every WWE pay-per-view on the webcast at WWE.com. I'm a poor, starving grad student who can't afford cable or satellite television, so the internet has become my gateway to the pay-per-view universe. The webcast costs the same as the more traditional cable or satellite version of the show, and you get the added bonus of being able to watch the show as many times as you want for the next week. I honestly think that I watched Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels a dozen times in the week following WrestleMania. So last Sunday I gladly gave WWE another $39.95 for the right to watch somewhat less than three hours of wrestling. The links to watch the actual show usually show up about half an hour before show time. There are usually four different "Watch" links (56K, 300K, 500K, and 750K) so that you can get the best stream for your connection speed. But last Sunday I noticed that the links were a bit late in appearing. In fact, five minutes before the show was schedule to begin, the links were still A.W.O.L. And then the show started, sans links. This situation was decidedly non-optimal.

However, WWE.com does have a contingency plan for troublesome situations just like this. There is a Live Chat Help feature that allows you to chat in real time with the helpful, friendly, and courteous technical support staff at WWE.com. I could recount the story of the next forty minutes of my life, but instead I'll simply refer you to an email that I sent to [e-mail] on Tuesday morning. You'll notice that I've deleted the name of the specific team member with whom I was chatting. I may want to kick WWE it its metaphorical nuts right about now, but it still seems wrong to smear someone's name all across my column when the problem may or may not have even been his fault. So yeah, here's the email:

Last Sunday, June 29, I purchased the WWE Night of Champions webcast, as I do for virtually every WWE pay-per-view. However, as the show time neared, I noticed that the "Watch" links (56K, 300K, 500K, 750K) were not posted in their normal location, next to the "Buy" link on the webcast page. I continued to refresh the page in the hope that the links would appear, but as of show time the "Watch" links still had not been posted. I went to the Live Chat Help feature in the Premium Content Help section to ask if the "Watch" links had been posted in a different location and began chatting with [deleted]. [Deleted] assured me that the links had been posted and were visible on the webcast page. He sent me a set of instructions for adjusting the Internet Options settings in Internet Explorer. I followed all of his instructions in order, but I still could not see the "Watch" links. However, [deleted] did not believe that I actually had followed his instructions, so he sent them to me again. I again followed all of his instructions in order, but I still could not see the "Watch" links. At this point I began to become quite frustrated, and [deleted] did little to help the situation. Rather than try to find a new solution, he then asked me to reboot my computer and follow his instructions for a third time. I obliged, rebooted my computer, and once again followed all of his instructions in order. I still could not see the "Watch" links, so I went back to the Live Chat Help feature and was again connected to [deleted]. During this process, I had also intermittently been emailing various friends both here in the United States and in Canada. Two different friends, one in the United States and one in Canada, independently confirmed for me that they were also unable to see the "Watch" links on the webcast page. That was when I knew that this was more than just a problem with my computer. However, when I mentioned this to [deleted], he assured me that the links had been posted to the webcast page and that I was the only one experiencing this problem. He was essentially calling me a liar. Even though I had already followed [deleted]'s instructions three times, he instructed me to try them again for a fourth time. I was extremely frustrated by this point, but I complied with his wishes one last time. As I expected, I still could not see the "Watch" links. Only then, forty minutes into the pay-per-view, did [deleted] offer to send me a direct link to the webcast. The direct link worked fine, and I was finally able to begin watching the show. However, I was left to wonder why he had not offered to send me a direct link thirty or thirty-five minutes earlier.

As I mentioned, I have purchased the webcast for all but two WWE pay-per-views since 2006, and I've always been quite satisfied. However, my experience with the Night of Champions webcast was completely unacceptable. I missed the first forty minutes of the pay-per-view, and thus the first two matches, because of errors by the staff of WWE.com. First, I still believe that there was a problem with the "Watch" links not being properly posted on the webcast page. The fact that I confirmed the absence of the links with two other people makes it almost impossible for me to believe that I was the only person experiencing this problem. I understand that technical difficulties arise from time to time, and that is why I was only mildly upset when I began chatting with [deleted]. However, the treatment that I received from [deleted] was both insulting and infuriating. The fact that he asked me to follow his instructions four times even though they had failed to rectify the problem the first time seems to indicate that he assumed I was too stupid to correctly follow a simple set of instructions. The fact that he did not believe that I had confirmed that other people could not see the "Watch" was an insult to my integrity. And the fact that he spent forty minutes playing games with me simply demonstrated that he was more concerned with following protocol than with making sure that I could actually watch the pay-per-view.

Because I was unable to watch the first forty minutes of the show, and because of the way I was treated by [deleted], I ask that either the money I paid ($39.95) be refunded or that my account be credited toward the purchase of a future pay-per-view webcast. In an economy such as this, when the price of food and gasoline is continually increasing, WWE needs to value its loyal customers. In a professional wrestling market such as this, where there are an increasing number of alternatives to WWE, WWE needs to value its loyal customers. And as I said, I have purchased the webcast for almost every WWE pay-per-view for the past two and a half years. I am an extremely loyal customer, and yet I was treated with nothing but disdain and disrespect by the staff of WWE.com. I will always be a fan of professional wrestling, but unless this situation is corrected to my satisfaction, then I may not always be a customer of WWE.

Sincerely,
Scott Slimmer
[e-mail]

Okay, let me step back for a minute. I'm actually a pretty easy going kind of guy. I don't get angry very often. I try not to let the small stuff get to me, and in the back of my mind I even remember some junior high school guidance counselor babbling about it all being small stuff. And that's sort of the tone that I intend to set in Don't Think Twice whenever possible. But like I said at the beginning of this column, I think we need to take a little detour this week. So bear with me. I feel the need to vent.

Really? Really? Did the fine, fine technical support staff at WWE.com REALLY just dick me around like that for forty minutes? I understand that technical difficulties arise from time to time. As they say, shit happens. Sure, you'd like to believe that a billion dollar corporation like WWE could remember to put up four freaking links when those links are somewhat vital to their business model, but hey, mistakes happen. I get that. But that whole clusterfuck with the live chat? Not cool. Seriously, seriously not cool. That team member's only goal should have been to make sure that I was watching the show as quickly as possible, but instead he wanted to screw around with my freaking internet options for forty minutes. And when I told him that other people had confirmed for me that they couldn't see the links as well, he all but called me a liar. Oh, and in case you're wondering, my sources were Small and Lansdell, who were kind enough to take time away from the show to verify the lack of links for me. The bottom line is that somebody at WWE.com screwed the pooch and fucked up the links. Period, end of story. I mean, isn't it funny how they want me to believe that my system had absolutely no problem seeing the "Buy" link but just magically decided to no-sell the "Watch" links? Now I don't know if my good friend on the other end of the chat was under specific orders to never admit to an error on the part of WWE.com or if he was just on a rogue mission to make my life suck as much as humanly possible, but either way he proved himself to be quite adept at jerking my chain for forty minutes before finally offering me the direct link. You know, I said in the email that he could have offered me the direct link as soon as we started chatting. But I just realized that would only have been the case if there had actually been a direct link when we started chatting. Was this guy truly being a monumental douche, or was he just stalling for time while the fine, fine staff at WWE.com tried to find the link themselves? The world may never know.

As soon as the show was over, I went back to the Live Chat Help and immediately began my noble yet futile quest to have WWE admit their error and refund my money. But because the universe hates me, I was once again connected to the same fine, fine team member that I had chatted with at great length earlier in the evening. I informed him of my displeasure and politely requested either a refund or a credit toward the purchase of a future pay-per-view. That's when he informed me that he couldn't give me a refund. Evidently WWE has a policy against giving refunds for pay-per-views. And yes, I completely understand that you wouldn't want ten thousand hysterical Cena fans demanding their money back if he happens to do the job in the main event. But this was different. This had nothing to do with the content of the show. This was about WWE treating a loyal customer like a piece of shit. So as I continued chatting with my newfound friend, I acknowledged that he very well may not have the power, the authority, or the stones to refund my money. But someone at WWE does, and I wanted to talk to them. We went back and forth for quite some time, and eventually he suggested that I could send an email to [e-mail]. I thanked him as insincerely as possible and began to compose the above email.

I probably should have sent that email right then and there. But there was still a little voice in my head telling me to calm down and at least sleep on it. Maybe morning would bring a bit more clarity. So I called it a night, went to work the next day, got busy with one thing or another, and before I knew it I was back home watching CM Punk become the NEW World Heavyweight Champion. I literally jumped off the couch. I cheered more than was probably appropriate. I marked like a little girl. All was right with the world, and for a while I seemed to forget all about Night of Champions and how WWE had demonstrated how little they respect and value me as a customer. Because I had just seen CM Punk become champion of the world. And how could I ever be upset with a company that had given me such a wonderful moment?

And it was right then that I began to appreciate that there is more to being a fan of professional wrestling than I had previously realized. I suddenly understood that being a fan of professional wresting is a rather abstract notion, because almost every time you act on your love of this industry you become more than just a fan. You become a customer. If you're a Batista fan who wants to watch him defeat Edge and win the World Heavyweight Championship, then you have to be a customer who buys the pay-per-view. If you're a Rock fan who wants to have access to all of his greatest matches, then you have to be a customer who buys his new DVD. If you're a Rey Mysterio fan who wants to see him hit the 619 live and in person, then you have to be a customer who buys a ticket to a local house show. And that's the dirty little truth that I suppose I'd been hiding from myself for too long. We can talk about our love of this industry. We can make professional wrestling an integral part of our lives. We can believe in our heroes. But at the end of the day, it's all still a business.

Being a fan of professional wrestling means being a customer of professional wrestling promotions, and professional wrestling promotions such as WWE have the unenviable task of keeping us satisfied as both fans and customers. I'll admit that it may well be impossible to always keep us satisfied as fans, but that's only because each fan has his or her own unique taste in professional wrestling. Some fans love Triple H. Some fans love John Cena. And so if you book Triple H vs. John Cena in the main event, and if you book a clean finish where one of them wins and one of them loses, then some fans are going to go home happy, and some fans are going to go home sad. Some fans are sick freaks. Some fans aren't. And so if you show Mae Young's geriatric titties on pay-per-view, then some fans are going to go home happy, and some fans are going to go home scarred for life. That's just the nature of the beast. You can't make all of the fans happy all of the time. Professional wrestling promotions need to realize this, and I'd venture to say that more than a few of the fans need to be reminded of it as well.

It's not fair to expect a professional wrestling promotion to always keep us satisfied as fans, but they damn well always keep us satisfied as customers. There is absolutely a right way and a wrong way to treat your customers when you run a business. You create a corporate atmosphere where customer satisfaction is paramount. You treat your customers with respect. You make it clear in every way possible that you value your customers. And that is how WWE failed me as a customer. They took my money and then didn't really seem to care one way or the other if I had access to the product that I had purchased. They treated me with disdain and disrespect. They made me believe that they placed no value in having me as a customer.

And that was the strange paradox that I struggled with as I went to bed Monday night. WWE had just made me an extremely happy fan by making CM Punk the World Heavyweight Champion, but they had also made me an extremely angry customer by fucking me over the night before. As much as I wanted to let bygones be bygones as a fan, I knew that as a customer I could not just let this slide. And so Tuesday morning I sent the above email to WWE. I have yet to receive a reply. They haven't even had the courtesy to deny my request. They've acted like I don't even exist. WWE has once again demonstrated how little they respect and value me as a customer. And so this is supposed to be the part where I take a stand. This is supposed to be the part where I say that I can no longer be a fan of a company that shows such little respect for its customers. This is supposed to be the part where I vow to never again purchase a WWE pay-per-view or DVD. This is supposed to be the part where I turn my back on WWE, just like they've turned their back on me. This is supposed to be the part where I say that I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore.

But all those week ago when I agreed to start writing this column, I made a promise to myself. I promised myself that I would never lie to you, the readers. I promised myself that I would be as open and honest and forthcoming as possible. I promised myself that I would always strive to write this column truthfully. And saying that I'm done with WWE wouldn't be truthful. It wouldn't be open and honest and forthcoming. In fact, it would be a damn lie. Because I know I'm going to watch Raw on Monday. And I know I'm going to watch Smackdown on Friday. And I even know that I'm going to break down and buy the next pay-per-view. Because I've had one more rather alarming revelation about what it means for me to be a fan of professional wrestling. I'm not just a fan. I'm not just a customer. I'm also an addict. I couldn't stop even if I wanted to. And as I write this column, I have to wonder if the anger I'm feeling at the moment is really directed toward WWE or toward myself. Because as much as I have been failed by WWE, I also have to wonder if I've been failed by myself. And that's something I may struggle with for quite some time to come.

So as tends to be the case when I write a column, I seem to have asked many questions and found few answers. But as I've said in the past, one of my main goals in writing this column is just to ask the right questions. It's up to you to find your own answers. So when you finish reading this column, think about this. WWE has made it perfectly clear that they do not respect or value me as a customer. And that means that they don't respect or value any of you as customers either. Now we know where WWE stands, and as any of you who grew up in the Eighties surely remember, knowing is half the battle. But the other half of the battle is deciding where you stand. Can you continue to be a fan of a company that couldn't care less about you as a customer? Can you separate the emotion of being a fan from the logic of being a customer? Or is this the last straw for you? Will this be what finally causes you to walk away? And maybe most important of all, are you an addict like me? Could you stop even if you wanted to?

I hope that gives you something to think about in the week to come. Feel free to leave a comment below and let me know what answers you've found for yourself. I'll be back next weekend with the introduction to Don't Think Twice. At least that's the plan.