Worth Your Wealth? 07.14.08: Victory Road

Hello again, 411 readers! “The One-Man Ratings Booster” here with another edition of “Worth Your Wealth?”! The idea is that you spend your hard-earned dollars on wrestling on a monthly basis, and I want you to know whether or not you’re getting your moneys worth. So read on and see if you’re investing wisely of if your cash is going to waste as this edition of…

Presents:

First, as always, we start off with our super-scientific formula for calculating the projected worth of each part of the show. Keep in mind I round things to the nearest nickel, so as not to piss myself off. Oh, and for the purposes of this column, I don’t have HD and neither do you.
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P = 2(A)x + 1.5(B)x + 1(C)x + 0.1(P)

Ten-percent of the PPV price accounts for non-wrestling related activities, such as in-ring promos, backstage segments, video packages, etc. Aside from that, A B and C represent the different classes of matches on the card:

Class C: Filler matches with little to no solid build behind them.
Class B: Secondary, but still significant matches that were well-promoted prior to the show.
Class A: The main event, as well as other high-profile, heavily promoted matches on the card.
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The Breakdown (as I see it):

Class C: Taylor Wilde vs. Awesome Kong, World X Cup Semifinal Tag Team Elimination Match

Class B: LAX vs. Beer Money, Angelina Love vs. Gail Kim, Jay Lethal vs. Sonjay Dutt, X-Cup Finals Ultimate X Match

Class A: Kurt Angle and Team-3D vs. Christian Cage, Rhino, and AJ Styles, Samoa Joe vs. Booker T

The Calculation (as the universe sees it):

30 = 2(2)x + 1.5(4)x + 1(2)x + 0.1(30)
30 = 4x + 6x + 2x + 3
27 = 12x
x = 3.00

The Result (as you will see it):

Class A: $4.50
Class B: $3.40
Class C: $2.25
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And now, THE GOODNESS!

Bonus Materials – Price Tag: $3.00

The highlight of the bonus features tonight was the series of segments highlighting Booker T’s return to Houston. These were all expertly done, particularly the one where Booker and Sharmell went to ‘Sharmell’s’ and Booker was ordering his employees to water down the booze. Good stuff here.

We also got treated(?) to BG James assisting with interviewing duties and encouraging fans to beat the shit out of mannequins backstage, as well as Abyss rescuing Taylor and dismantling Saeed.

Overall, I couldn’t really complain about any of the non-wrestling stuff this time.

Overall Value: $3.00

X-Cup Elimination 12-Man Tag Team Match: Team TNA def. Team Mexico, Team Japan, and Team International via Pinfall (Kryptonite Krunch) – Price Tag: $2.25

This was a hell of a match to open the show. Despite a lot of these guys being relative unknowns as far as TNA goes, the crowd was super into this match and so was I. As Csonka pointed out, it DID start out as a bit of a clusterfuck, but things quickly improved after the first few eliminations.

This match was an excellent example of what an opening match. Something fast-paced and excited to get the crowd into the show. This is one aspect of the PPV product where TNA seems to consistently top WWE. The one thing I didn’t like was the fact that Team TNA won this match, which any idiot could tell you meant that Kaz would NOT be winning Ultimate X and bringing home the X-Cup.

That minor complaint aside, this was a phenomenal opener and more than worth the price tag.

Overall Value: $3.25

Gail Kim def. Angelina Love via Pinfall (Neck Breaker) – Price Tag: $3.40

It’s not often that a TNA Knockouts match seems more like a WWE Diva’s match, but this was a sad exception. Not to take anything away from Gail, she pretty much carried this thing. Angelina Love plays her character very well, but her work rate is just not up to the same standard as Gail Kim. This kinda reminded me of a better version of Trish Stratus/Christy Hemme at Wrestlemania.

That said, Gail did her best to carry Angelina to a good match and Angelina did her best to keep up with Gail. It wasn’t awful, but it certainly wasn’t the type of match I’ve come to expect from the TNA Knockouts.

Overall Value: $2.75

“The Guru” Sonjay Dutt def. “Black Machismo” Jay Lethal via Pinfall (Rollup) – Price Tag: $3.40

This feud has really picked up steam following the awful wedding angle which saw Sonjay look like a complete bitch as soon as he turned heel. I love the little band of kiddy zealots he’s recruited to chant and bang on tambourines.

Anyway, the match itself wasn’t bad, but something about it just didn’t click for me. I think given the participants, I expected something a bit more fast-paced. It was clear the match was more about the story surrounding it, which was fine, but in order to sell the story the match has to be exciting enough to get people to care about it. The finish was expected, Dutt gets the pinfall while Lethal is distracted by Val. Though I’ve got to hand it to TNA, for once they didn’t pull the obvious turn and Val’s status remains in limbo. Bonus points there, but not enough to make this one worth it.

Overall Value: $2.50

“Fan’s Revenge” TNA Tag Team Championship: LAX (c) def. Beer Money via Pinfall (Gringo Cutter) – Price Tag: $3.40

Here’s another match that was built well but failed to deliver, as far as I’m concerned. I’ve enjoyed the feud itself, though I was never sold on the whole fan-interaction aspect of this match. I honestly don’t know who even could have briefly considered this a good concept. Putting the heel at a disadvantage in a big money match completely kills the heat of the feud. So LAX is the champs AND the fan favorites AND they have 12 fans with leather straps hanging around who are only going to beat on Roode and Storm? Bullshit.

Aside from the absurdity of the stipulation, there wasn’t much to enjoy. There were some good spots and the fan interaction DID come off well for a few brief moments, but overall this was just a big old boat full of fail. I most definitely did not dig this.

Overall Value: $2.00

TNA Knockouts Championship: Taylor Wilde (c) def. Awesome Kong (w/ Raisha Saeed) via Pinfall (Miracle Rollup) – Price Tag: $2.25

I’ve been digging this miracle storyline they’ve been playing up for Taylor Wilde, but I think overall it was a bad idea to put her over Kong twice in one week after Kong has done nothing but destroy people for the past couple months. It would have been much smarter to take the match they ran on Impact this past Thursday and put THAT on the PPV. They could have played up Taylor earning another shot at the money and the belt and then there could have been this huge miracle moment at Victory Road. Oh well…

The match itself was fine. I like Taylor and Kong is, well, awesome. That said, I liked this match with this finish a lot better when I saw it on Thursday…when it was new. The PPV rematch was not only not as good, but also completely lacking any amount of originality to differentiate from the one we saw 3 days earlier.

Overall Value: $1.00

World X-Cup Ultimate X Match: Voloador Jr. def. Kaz, Naruki Doi, and Davari via Giant X Obtaining to win the 2008 World X-Cup for Team Mexico – Price Tag: $3.40

I had high hopes for this match. Despite not being a regular TNA viewer for more than about 8 months now, I have always made a point of watching their PPVs with my more hardcore friend when he would mention there would be an Ultimate X match. They’ve always delivered incredible action and excitement and I was really counting on this one to steal the show at Victory Road.

Maybe it’s my own fault for setting my expectations so high, I’m not sure, but this was definitely the most underwhelming Ultimate X match I’ve seen so far. These four guys worked their asses off and did their best to put on a great match, and there WERE some fantastic spots, but overall I was left wishing for something better. I’m not really sure what happened, the usual excitement of the match just wasn’t there. Especially compared to the opening X-Cup match which featured three times the people WITHOUT the high flying gimmick stipulation, this match really should have been a lot better.

Don’t get me wrong, this was a good match and I enjoyed it. It’s more than I honestly was expecting to give this match a couple dollars more than its price tag and I’m sorry to say I can’t justify it.

Overall Value: $3.40

Full Metal Mayhem: Kurt Angle and Team-3D def. AJ Styles, Christian Cage, and Rhino via Pinfall (Super Olympic Slam) – Price Tag: $4.50

Raise your hand if you didn’t think this was going to be Full Metal Mayhem. Ok, now if you raised your hand, bring it down quickly in such a way that it nails your nuts. Good work, idiot.

Ok, the first thing I have to point out here is this – BRAVO TNA FOR SURPRISING ME A SECOND TIME TONIGHT AND NOT PULLING WHAT I THOUGHT WOULD BE THE SECOND GIRLFRIEND HEEL TURN OF THE NIGHT! Karen Angle played absolutely no part in this match or its outcome and I thought this was amazing.

On top of the awesomeness that was the absence of Karen, the match itself was highly entertaining. The main story here, obviously, was Kurt vs. AJ and they played this up very well. The other participants busted their asses and put on a hell of a show, but ultimately it came down to these two guys doing everything they could to defeat each other. They kicked out of each others respective finishers and the finish saw Angle hit an Olympic Slam (its NOT the Angle Slam, I don’t care what anyone says) off the top of the ladder following interference by the nefarious Frank Trigg. What a bastard. The feud will undoubtedly continue from here and yay for that. As for the Cage/Rhino vs Dudley feud they were probably hoping for, it seems like Devon may be out of action for some amount of time, so we’ll have to wait and see with that one.

Overall Value: $5.50

TNA World Championship: Samoa Joe (c) and Booker T apparently fought to a No Contest (Confusing Ass Finish) – Price Tag: $4.50

To say this match was different that what I expected would be an understatement. I was planning to see a pretty intense one-on-one match between two good workers that would see Joe narrowly escape with the win. What we got instead was…well…I’m not entirely sure.

Let’s start with the match prior to the finish. The action was solid, they really sold the heat of the feud, Joe ate a blade and we saw quite a bit of Sharmell in the crowd. Then, things slowly turned ugly. Joe apparently snapped…was this a heel turn? I’m not sure. At any rate, he went nutso and started beating the shit out of security guys, referees, and ultimately Booker T, going so far as to bust him open and then PULL THE WOUND OPEN WIDER. Pretty intense stuff.

Then Sting shows up. The power of Christ compels him to step in and resuce the heel from the savage beating he’s receiving from the face while the heels wife garners sympathy by crying and begging for the face to stop. Joe tells him to fuck off and Sting nails him with the bat. So if you’re keeping score, our face champion went crazy, beat the shit out of probably 12 random people, and then was stopped dead in his tracks by 2 bat shots from Sting. Oh, and Booker and Sharmell scampered off with the belt as Tenay and West contemplated who was the TNA champion.

What. The. Hell?

While I like the idea of the double turn here, I think they completely killed it by bringing Sting in to the fold and having him immediately kill all the momentum Joe had just built. And come on TNA, are we really supposed to be wondering who the champion is? I hate these gimmicks they run where guys steal the belt and then the guy who is the champion has to compete to get the belt back even though it’s technically his. Doesn’t that kind of make the belt completely pointless?

Anyway, this was an entertaining match that had an interesting finish, but ultimately they killed it with Sting showing up and incapacitating Joe with two bat shots. We’ll see where this goes…AND WHO IS THE CHAMPION OMG?!

Overall Value: $4.50

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The Final Tally:

Overall Price Tag: $30.00

Match of the Night: World X-Cup 12-Man Elimination Tag Team Match – 144% Value ($3.25 worth, $2.25 price tag.)

Trash of the Night: TNA Knockout Championship: Taylor Wilde vs. Awesome Kong – 44% Value ($1.00 value, $2.25 price tag.)

Overall Value: $28.15

Resulting PPV Rating: A (93% Worth)

Closing Comments:

When the worst match on the card is still worth almost half price, that’s a pretty good sign. The opening match totally stole the show with nearly 25 minutes of non-stop entertainment. The co-main events both came off well, even if the Joe/Booker match did end on somewhat of a confusing note. Overall, TNA put on its best show so far this year. I’d like to point out that one of the best things about this show was that it DIDN’T feature the obvious swerves that most of us were probably expecting. In a way, TNA has finally caught us off guard by NOT trying to ‘shocking’ turns in half the angles they book. Bottom line, this show is worth checking out, especially for the 12-man tag and Full Metal Mayhem.
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Year in Review:

1. TNA Victory Road – A (93% Worth – $28.15 / $30.00)
Match of the Night: World X-Cup 12-Man Tag Team Elimination match – 144% Value ($3.25 worth, $2.25 price tag).

2. WWE Night of Champions – A (93% Worth – $37.20 / $40.00)
Match of the Night: WWE Championship: Triple H vs. John Cena – 111% Value ($7.00 Worth, $6.30 price tag).

3. WWE Backlash – A- (90% Worth – $36.25 / $40.00)
Match of the Night: World Heavyweight Championship: The Undertaker vs. Edge – 101% Value ($7.00 Worth, $6.90 price tag).

4. WWE Judgment Day – B+ (89% Worth – $35.65 / $40.00)
Match of the Night: Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels – 114% Value ($5.95 worth, $5.20 price tag.)

5 (tie). WWE One Night Stand– B (86% Worth – $34.35 / $40.00)
Match of the Night: World Heavyweight Championship TLC Match: The Undertaker vs. Edge – 112% Value ($7.75 worth, $6.90 price tag.)

5 (tie). WWE Wrestlemania 24 – B (86% Worth – $47.25 / $55.00)
Match of the Night: Career-Threatening Match: Shawn Michaels vs. “The Nature Boy” Ric Flair- 116% Value ($8.00 worth, $6.90 price tag).

7. TNA Slammiversary – B (84% Worth – $25.20 / $30.00)
Match of the Night: X-Division Championship: Petey Williams vs. Kaz – 111% Value ($4.50 worth, $4.05 price tag).

8. TNA Lockdown – B (83% Worth – $24.95 / $30.00)
Match of the Night: TNA World Heavyweight Championship: Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe – 116% Value ($5.00 worth, $4.30 price tag).

9. TNA Sacrifice – C (74% Worth – $22.15 / $30.00)
Match of the Night: X-Division TerrorDome – 100% Value ($3.25 worth, $3.25 price tag).
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And with that folks, we’ll see you next time with another edition off…