Truth B Told 7.17.08: Pornography Killed the Wrestling Stars

Posted by Bayani Domingo on 07.17.2008

Do I really need a teaser for this? Wait, I guess I do. Okay, well this week we take a look at a promotion staring porn “stars” and the extinct notion of a pure wrestling promotion.


I almost hate to give these guys any free promotion but I saw this on socaluncensored.com and I just had to talk about it this week. There is a fairly new promotion (or one I had never heard of before) called Not Rated Pro Wrestling. The tag line is: Where Pro Wrestlers and Porn Stars collide!! I actually thought that was Lita and Major Gunns' tag team slogan, but perhaps I was wrong. Then again if you had to ask me where I thought, "Pro wrestlers and porn stars collide" I would have probably said, "I don't know…the butt?" I'm not going to run down the entire card for you but I just thought two matches in general had to be highlighted which were:

Semi Main Event
NRPW Heavyweight Champion Buff Bagwell vs. Sean Casey (former WWE wrestler and Playgirl centerfold)

X Rated Champion Evan Stone(porn star) vs. Craig Valentine(porn Star)

Oh and to top that the "Main Event" is a 20 man Royal Rumble style battle royal where the winner becomes the #1 contender for the NRPW Heavyweight Championship. On top of all that awesomeness are matches featuring former TNA jobber David Young, Team Japan pinch hitter PUMA, as well as the man formerly known as B-Squared…Bull Buchanan. "Also scheduled to appear" are: NRPW Commissioner Mary Carey, Heidi Mayne, Nikki Hunter, Monica Mayhem, Brooke Belle, Nick Manning, Tommy Gunn, Logan James, Christina Star, NY Knockout Nikki, and many more Porn Stars and Pro Wrestlers. Now where can you find this massive pile of fantasticness? Not just any old hick town or nowheres-ville…but right smack down in the middle of ritzy and glitzy BAKERSFIELD, CA at the Bakersfield Dome. What…the…F*ck!?!?

Okay, let me just tell you that after I read about this show my mind literally exploded and rendered me catatonic for nearly 2 full minutes as I saw there dumbfounded at this news and my brain was short circuited by no less than 37 different jokes that I instantaneously thought of to describe the absurdity of this promotion. Seriously…I woke up a few minutes later with a drip of drool hanging down my chin as the mere possibility of endless jokes had sent my brain into overload. The least of which had me thinking, "Whatever happened to Savage Beach and when are they returning for a 3rd time?" The mere though of two porn stars actually wrestling a match over a recognized Championship is almost too much smarky goodness to handle. I mean, I can't imagine that match is going to end with a "clean finish". Besides, Valentine really needs this win because you only get "one shot" at that belt. Well…until maybe 20 minutes later after a quick rest, some Gatorade, and some help from a chick named Cindi who just got off the bus from Iowa.

While I was sitting there and salivating over how many Porn/Wrestling jokes I could make in the "Leftovers" section I was thinking about the possibility that a company like this with such an outlandish gimmick could actually become moderately successful. Or at least do enough ticket sales to end up making a few bucks. I really have to wonder if the wrestling business truly has become a parody of itself. While this isn't the WWE, TNA, or Ring of Honor trying to pull off a stunt like this, it really has me wondering if wrestling can survive on their own without having to constantly point out the ridiculousness of itself and expose itself on a consistent basis by trotting out "celebrities" and "publicity stunts" in an attempt to get people to tune in, buy tickets, or click "Buy" on the old 900 channels.

It's ironic that considering how many porn/wrestling puns I make on a weekly basis that even I thought having a full on promotion mixing the two would be a total abortion. Sure companies have always used T ‘n A to sell their product from Divas to the old cage dancers TNA used to employ, but this is a step beyond. Not that "Naked Women's Wrestling League" is a great comparison, seeing as how that really is just soft core pornography masquerading as wrestling, but this isn't that much further from the concept. I guess the idea here is that the demographic for wrestling fans is pretty much the same as pornography fans. Which…I can't really argue against, let's face it…we're all just a bunch of pervs. If you've not jacking it to John Cena or Bryan Danielson matches, you're probably beatin' it to Mary Carey or Nikki Hunter. Of course if anyone ever spliced in scenes from Wrestlemania and "Xtreme Facials: You Can't See Me", then they would be possibly the most confusing jerkin' of your life. 5 knuckle shuffle indeed. But the fact is that this promotion is going to get tickets sold one of 3 ways: 1) someone will buy tickets for the sheer ridiculousness and spectacle of a company like this purely for irony sake, 2) someone is hoping to just see a boob and is willing to pay $15 or $20 in the hopes that someone's top will "accidentally" fall off at ringside, and 3) David Young is your ride home. I want to take this all with a grain of salt and revel in it's ri-doc-ulousness, but at the same time I sometimes think that as wrestling fans we're sort of treated like either morons or simpletons.

I look at the world of televised "sports entertainment" and realize that for the most part companies like the WWE focus more on the "entertainment" rather than the "sport" aspect. While TNA tried to be an "alternative" they manage to sneak way more "entertainment" than they need to and while they do often pull off great matches and exhibitions of wrestling goodness like they did with the World X Cup, they also end up signing Hermie Sadler to a talent deal, bring in Frank Trigg as an integral part of an important feud, as well as all the ill fated run of Pacman Jones as a TNA Tag Team Champion. TNA consistently tries to play in the same pool as the WWE by bringing in as much mainstream attention as possible in order to gain some kind of media attention or draw in a casual fan or two, but is having Ace Young take up a few minutes of time on screen with a cheesy grin and music video really going to do your company any more good than giving the X-Division or Tag Team Division those extra minutes to work a match? The WWE itself has proven that adding more "attractions" to their product is "hit and miss" at best.

If you point to the Big Show/Mayweather match at Wrestlemania you can either point to that as a failure or a mild success. While numbers have been thrown around as to how much "Pretty Boy" Floyd got for his involvement anything more than a million or two would seem like an outrageous number considering that the buyrate wasn't spiked to an insane degree from last year and even so you can't directly pin any more buys to Mayweather exclusively. I don't think his involvement hurt, however the "push" he got came at the expense of Big Show as well as any other wrestlers that might have gotten that exposure instead. Say...Bobby Lashley for example. In the past the WWE has brought in "celebrities" to play minor or even major roles in angles and storylines. While some celebrity involvement has been as minor as Rob Schneider judging a Diva contest to Pamela Anderson escorting Diesel to the ring, other celebrities have taken more major roles and become the focus of bigger angles. K-Fed graced the WWE for a very short period and you could argue that his involvement was either harmless or very entertaining, especially considering the man didn't exactly garner a huge payday. However I'm sure some of you would like to forget Steve-O's infamous involvement with Umaga and his unfortunate inability to properly "sell" for the Samoan Bulldozer. Santino has been fed to a number of jobbers and clowns over the past year, but I'm not sure how necessary it was to include several segments involving Jimmy Kimmel and Cousin Sal. Those segments took away valuable TV time away from guys who probably could have used it. Right Trevor?

Even now in RoH you are starting to see a shift to some more "sports entertainment" minded angles than you had in the future. I think for RoH it is an organic growth into the mainstream that was inevitable, especially with the need to grow their market and customer base and to be honest the growth of Indy fans is relatively stagnate. However, if RoH can pull in some of the WWE's fan base than their growth potential is imminently greater. Clearly the RoH still values their in-ring performance more than they do their angles and stores, however they are in a situation now where they are having problems stepping up their wrestling and have to focus on other weaknesses in order to improve as a company. That isn't to say that RoH is lacking in wrestling entertainment, however they are in a position where their in-ring work is usually top notch, however their production and creative writing still has a way to go to catch up. I'm not really all that happy about the "Simulated Rape angle" nor was I a fan of showing possibly more violence between Jimmy Jacobs and Lacey that was never shown. I think that shows a lack of class on RoH's part. Women are not to be treated as objects to be molested and abused, but rather they are to be ogled and stalked from afar, until one day they catch us and a restraining order is levied against us. Or...used to make up for the lack of depth in a lazy Thursday column. Right HERE... on 411mania. *Thumbs Up*

While I don't think RoH has sunken to the depths that other promotions have I'm more than a little concerned when I see that Mickey Rourke and Johnny Fairplay make the occasional appearance. I'm just hoping I am overreacting because I tend to look at RoH as the TRUE alternative to "sports entertainment", still it bare some notice. I've touched on this subject in past columns but at times I feel as though as a wrestling fan I am given a certain amount of wrestling each week on TV while the "e" or "T" decide how much time they will devote to showing random guests in the audience, crossover "celebrities" who get shown in useless vignettes or promos, or even worse...a "parody" or some celebrity or current event that the writers think is just satirical gold. If the WWE never does another parody of a politician or celebrity feud again I'll be a very happy man. Then again this is all about the dolla, dolla, dolla now. Not about the actual wrestling. It just disappoints me now that it seems like some companies don't have enough faith in their own product and talent to try to capitalize on those assets to make money and interest fans in buying their PPVs and merchandise, rather than hope that cheap plugs by celebs or 10 second clips on sports center or E! will bring in the cash.

I guess the bigger question is whether wrestling companies can not only survive but thrive based on promoting wrestling exclusively. It seems like most companies don't believe they can without having to either carve out some ridiculous niche in the world of entertainment or provide some mainstream ties that will lead to potentially new fans. While I believe most Indy companies do so, as well as foreign companies in Mexico and Japan the WWE and TNA don't seem to buy into that theory that actually keeping a wrestling show focused on wrestling and wrestling related storylines exclusively is enough to achieve their financial goals. Ring of Honor has survived on this principle for years, however I am not sure that in the future that will continue to be their aim as the company is still growing, however that growth is not as coming fast enough to sustain the sort of expansion I'm sure they have in mind. Especially with the PPV buyrates not just not doing as well as one would hope with a product that features such great actual wrestling. Its almost as if the more RoH tries to prove the point, the less they are able to do so. However if a company is to be able to thrive on the principle that wrestling fans really just want good wrestling then RoH is the beacon of hope most of us are hanging our hopes on.

The business of wrestling is simply that: a business. While some companies hope to differentiate themselves by employing a different style or culture (like CHIKARA), other rely on strong regional support and local talent to survive (PWG, IWA:MS, etc), and still others like RoH try to provide the best product they can by becoming a "Super Indy" and bringing all the best unsigned talent together that they can in hopes that the "hit and miss" nature of their booking is made up for by strong ring performances, fan loyalty, and the performers willingness to make personal and professional sacrifices. When it comes to companies like TNA and the WWE they have a very different model. Basically they need to pull in as many new fans as possible. Whether that is relying on generations of wrestling fans to procreate and create future generations of fans, or simply grow new ones from mainstream sources they may either not be aware of wrestling or simply choose to focus on the "entertainment" aspect of the product rather than feel foolish by actually trying to buy into wrestling as a legitimate "sports". TNA and the WWE has basically decided that they aren't going to convert many Indy fans that are well aware of their product. If they did we would see more cruiserweight action in the "e" and matches that last longer than 5 minutes on Impact. I really believe their target audience lies in the "casual fan" that thinks that while wrestling is "silly" it is a form of entertainment. Its a mode of thinking that if wrestling doesn't try to take itself so seriously then people won't feel so stupid watching it and having to try to accept it as serious. A "casual fan" can enjoy wrestling for either the "irony" or rather the entertainment value of a "television show", hence why not show other TV and movie stars who also support their product.

Fact of the matter is that wrestling used to belong to wrestling fans. Now it feels more and more that it belongs to the companies and the "potential" fans that aren't tuning in every week like we are. I look at a small company working in Bakersfield as a sign of the times that wrestling itself just isn't selling anymore or at the least as well as it used to. It is sad to say that if you took the porn stars off this show I'm sure the crowd would be about half the size it is now if you replaced them with similar local talent. Its the "spectacle factor" and the "irony" for the sake of "entertainment" that sells in Bakersfield...along with some delicious strawberries you'll find on the roadside. It seems like no one is in the "wrestling business" anymore, they are all in the "Entertainment Biz". Well, I guess that means E! is going to be a hell of a lot busier now on Monday and Thursday nights...I just can't imagine Ryan Seacrest is going to be any better at announcing than Adamle. Then again...could he be any worse? Yes...the answer to that question is yes.

The Truth

Man can't live on wrestling alone, I guess wrestling companies can't either. I guess sometimes as a fan we hope that companies never grow too big because of the pitfalls that come with growth, that being that continuous growth is always needed and that means compromising for the sake of tapping into that "mainstream market" they all get a hard on for. While Indy fans can sit there and wag their righteous fingers at those companies for "selling out", the fact is, if those Indy companies we love so much had the chance...don't you think they wouldn't mind "selling out" too if it meant a few more coins in their pockets and some shiny new cameras?

Coming Up Short

I'm hearing that the Ultimate X Finals of the World X Cup were a bit disappointing. Not "bad" necessarily, just not as great as people thought it could have been. Then again I'm also hearing that the 12 man Elimination Match to open the PPV was 19 flavors of awesome. That's actually great to hear. The downside is that Volador Jr. got to pick up the win for Team Mexico even though him and Averno only made appearances once for the tournament and Ishikawa didn't make the PPV at all and was replaced by TJ Perk…I mean PUMA. That's all well and good, but I'm wondering why people are giving so much shit to TNA for not being able to figure out their Visa problems and get all those guys coordinated at the tapings when they need to. Quite simply regardless of what you say, the "e" would never have been able to pull that off flawlessly either. Especially considering that a) they never would do anything like the World X Cup in the first place, b) they would never even let their cruisers get that much TV time to begin with, and c) they wouldn't have been able to or willing to bring in that many other guys from other companies or who aren't under their "Development" and certainly wouldn't have booked them that strong.

Face it, TNA just had problems because they aren't all encompassing and had to work around a number of factors. No one else has ever tried to coordinate that much outside talent from other foreign companies before at once and I thought they did the best they could. The end result is that if TNA put together that tournament in one DVD with some bonus material or extras and past matches that DVD would sell pretty damn well. I actually commend TNA for trying to keep up the tradition of World X Cup and I'm hoping that coming up short of their own expectations don't sour them for the potential of a 2010 World X Cup.

6 Degrees of…



Since we got last week's winner out of the way…well last week. This week I went with the newest Women's Champion in TNA: Shantelle Taylor

Thinking of other underdogs turned champions I'm reminded of a real spitfire that came from meager beginnings to dominate one of the greatest shows in the history of shows: Ayako Mikyake



Yeah, you're on your own if you wanna figure out who this is. But if you're a G4 geek like myself you'll have no problem linking these fine female fatales.

Whatchu talkin' bout readers?

If I were you guys I'd be talking about why CM Punk is booked like a bigger bitch than Omarosa ever was.

6 Degrees Results

#3

Greg Pryor

I've decided to throw my name into the hat this week seeing as Rafael Nadal comes from the island which is my favourite holiday destination!

Rafael Nadal recently won Wimbeldon
Wimbeldon used to have a football (soccer) team which used to include now actor Vinnie Jones
Vinnie Jones got into an alterication at Capital Carnage(a uk ppv) with the Big Bossman
The Big Bossman was once in a tag team with Bull Buchanan (b-squared)
Who was also on smackdown as a running buddy of John Cena
Who was rumoured to be in a relationship with Mickie James

Not bad, but Nadal to Wimbledon isn't exactly the strongest link. Then again I thought your favourite holiday destination was actually Mickie James.

#2

James Conwell

Felt sorry for you this week so I thought I'd send one in.

1) Rafael Nadal just won his 1st Wimbledon title.
2) Wimbledon once had a famous football (soccer) team which included one John Fashanu
3) John Fashanu went on to host Celebrity Wrestling on ITV in the UK. The worst semi wrestling reality drivel ever created.
4) Hang on a second what could be worse, oh the complementry show on ITV2 "Celebrity Wrestling, BRING IT ON!" Co-Hosted by Jack Osbourne
5) Jack Osbourne was in "Armed and Famous" with Trish Stratus (tazer induced orgasm included http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UncMrAt5gE4 )
6) Trish Stratus probably had a few matches with Mickie James but all I remember is the lesbian stuff.

Cheers
Jimmy

Wow, so now pity isn't just getting me laid anymore, it's also getting me 6DO entries. I'll take it. Actually I can't remember much more of the Trish/Mickie matches either except for the greatest reversal to the "Stratusfaction" of all time. Finger licking good. Kind of makes you sad to see how lame Mickie has become since Trish left town. Still got a body I'd work like a day laborer in a strawberry field for $.50 an hour…but otherwise she's so damn dull.

#1.

And in a shocking turn of events, look who's back to continue our heated feud! Hope you enjoyed your moments of zen cuz it's on again now Bayani! Oh yeah!

1) Rafael Nadal outlasted and defeated Roger Federer in the longest and perhaps best tennis match of maybe all-time this year at Wimbledon just a few weeks ago.
2) Federer is an official sponsor and appears in numerous commercials for the Gilette Fusion razor (damn fine product by the way) alongside fellow internationally renowned uber-athlete Tiger Woods.
3) At the WGC-American Express Championship in 2005, Woods was actually tied with fellow golfer John Daly at the end of regulation play. Woods would win on the 2nd playoff hole though.
4) John Daly recently participated in a celebrity golf tournament and was partnered with one Kid Rock.
5) Kid Rock, a described southern rock star, is a fan of fellow southern rock band Lynard Skynard, going so far as to mention them by name in the lyrics of "American Badass".
6) Lynard Skynard...ok Skynard is a not-so-veiled attempt to run this sweet picture of Mickie James (see attached). Love it.

Until next time...I'm coming for you Domingo!

Tenchi Masaki

So I pretty much gave Tenchi this one for being the only guy not to just say "Nadal won Wimbledon". Not that I'm at all intimidated by a guy that sounds like he belongs in Tozawa-Juku, but for some reason the pure redneckedness (sp?) of this entry amuses me so.

Left Overs…

The biggest difference between Porn and Wrestling? Nobody likes a "blown spot" in wrestling.

Doesn't TNA have that "No man on woman violence" rule? I wonder what what happen to Chris Abyss after his Black Hole Slam on Saeed? Also…how proud of you that I didn't make any racial or sexual jokes involving Abyss, Kong, and the term "Black Hole Slam"? Not very? Damn…you're just like my folks. Where is my Billy Corgan music when I need it…oh yeah.

I think Billy Corgan would have been the perfect guy to do the theme music for Billy Gunn. Cuz' when you think about being depressed and wanting to slit your wrists…you think of a Billy Gunn match. Or at least his ring gear.

It's no surprise that Dos Caras Jr. turned down the WWE's contract offer. I could just see him during his training sessions at FCW, "Okay Dos Caras, now what we are going to do here is an elbow and collar tie up…yes, now…okay, you could do an armdrag there, that's fine…let's go ahead and try a hammerlock and…um…okay, yes another armdrag like that is cool, but…alright, go to the mat and we'll do a pin attempt and a…how the fuck did you armdrag out of that? What the hell?"

The only downside to Michael Hayes' proposed tag team of MVP and Trevor Murdoch would have been that at some point MVP would have had to have said, "I'm getting too old for this shit" in a promo.

Would anyone else buy a t-shirt with Cryme Tyme flanking John Cena that said, "Milk's Favorite Stable"?

So how many people were hoping that John Cena would have run past CM Punk hanging out at the Pepsi machine at the end of RAW? C'mon…I KNOW that wasn't just me.

I actually think it would be awesome to have Pepsi sponsor CM Punk and a subsequent feud to ensue between Pepsi loving Punk and Coke loving Jeff Hardy. I mean…Coke snorting Jeff Hardy.

Don't worry about Snitsky suddenly looking a lot whiter and flabbier lately as it looks as if he'll be adopting a new gimmick soon with as a sailor apparently he'll also be feuding with a new up and coming stable as well. Who ya gonna call?

I heard that some pedophile was caught trying to have sex with a 14 year old girl he met online and was pictured wearing a WWE shirt. $50 says it was a "John Cena" one. You got to have the right bait for the right catch.

You know how on "To catch a Predator" Chris Hanson always comes out and says the same thing, "So what's going on?" I would LOVE for one dude to just fire back, "nothing…just filming for my show "To Be a Predator"…how bout you?"

If you're a porn star/wrestler…isn't the "Piledriver" just a default "Finisher"?

Edge and Vickie's wedding? This is NOT what they had in mind when they were talking about NAFTA.

See the difference between a guy like Super Crazy and Paul London is the fact that Super Crazy manages to make the best of his situation. Be it jobbing on Heat or jobbing on ECW. Paul London could learn a thing or two from Super Crazy. You know what they say: When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. But when life gives Super Crazy lemons…he packages those fuckers up in a plastic bag and sells them at the nearest off ramp for a crisp $5 bill.

The Great Booty Debate 2008

Oh we truly are pushing the limits here this week as we pit the Punjabi princess Bahara against the gravity defying Veronica Rodriguez. Indian is still "Asian" right? Oh and I was actually considering entering Veronica as a "Tag Team"...Good....GOD!

Random Asian Bitch Lookin' Good Pic of the Week



How Indian is this girl? Enough to me ignore any part that isn't.

Random Latina Bitch Lookin' Good Pic of the Week



How much booty is too much booty? You be the judge.

There is a thing line between schizophrenic and successful business man. And that line is a Blue Tooth. If more homeless people wore Blue Tooths we'd probably be more likely to give them our spare change in return for some sound financial advice, "Buy stock in cats…CATS!!"

Speaking of Indy companies "Selling Out", PWG Sells Out: The Best of Vol 1 is now on sale at your local Best Buy. 3 discs, $14.95, you couldn't beat that deal with a stick. But if you did you'd still have to buy the DVD since it would be all jacked up and broken. So...you know...just use cash instead. Cash you just acquired from cashing in your Cat stock that is.

Pimpin' In High Places

I'm just counting the days until my vacation in August, my first real one all year. Trying to decide whether to just mail a column in and do a quickie, have a "clip show", or maybe just hand off the solemn duties of scoping for hot ass semi-naked chicks to one of my cohorts. The last thing I need is to take a week off and find Tenchi hanging pictures of his kids and Koko B Ware up in my office.:

Sadly I must report that this is the very last Ask 411 being manned by my old nemesis Steve Cook. The man was a great foil and was the Milk to my lactose intolerance, the panties to my Paris Hilton, the ...well you get the picture. I'm not too choked up however because I'm sure Cook will be lurking around here somewhere, popping up when I least expect him. Like a Wednesday. That seems highly unlikely.

411's Annual Indy Draft Part II, watch me bring PWG to the very heights of Indy dominance. Who says drafting from the bottom of the first round never works out?

R to the 4th Power

Shawty

HH

CoH

Eubanks

Lansdell

D-Dubya

Just came back from the World Power Wrestling show at the OC Fair Grounds for a 7:30 pm show on Wednesday night where CIMA was selling the first batch of tickets for the Dragon Gate US show in Los Angeles on Sept 5th. In the near future I'll be doing a column to talk about the upcoming show, but for now let's see what the ticket situation is going to be like. Tickets range from $50 for "Super Seats" to $20 for "B" Seats, which are the 7th and 8th row seats. It'll be interesting to see how many seats that equates to for Dragon Gate because if they are looking at the model that PWG goes with then typically 4 rows of seats cover about 400 to 450 people. So DG might be hoping for around 600 to 700 folks. Not sure, but that's pretty lofty. Either way it looks like if this is my first and last chance to see a DG show live so I had to pony up for those "Super Seats". I'm assuming that the extra $10 means that you get to take one of the Harajuku girls home with you after BxB Hulk does his entrance dance. At least that's how I'm "interpreting" it…so don't be calling the cops when one ends up missing.

Till then, the Truth will set you free.
-B