The Happy-Go-Sucky Wrestling Report: 8.06.08

Posted by Steve Sullivan on 08.06.2008

Cena and Batista win the tag titles, Flair can finally enjoy retirement, Brock Lesner hints at a return, TNA considering breaking up LAX, Brent Albright wins the NWA title, and some thoughts on TNA's video game!

Welcome one and all to what is without a doubt, the most interestlingly named column on the Internet today!

Here, being a hypocrite is the name of the game! We examine both the positives and the negatives of your wrestling headlines. It's always easy to complain about something, but finding the positive is what makes this job challenging...and stressful.

I say this because it's apparent by a lot of your comments that some of you don't get that we are looking at two different points of views here. And I'm sure those same people who are missing out on this message are probably avoiding this message right now. So I've devised a full fledged plan to get them to pay attention to this paragraph.

BOOBIES! (Now go read the paragraph above!)

There, that should do it. Now that we're all on the same page, let's rassle!

News: John Cena and Batista win the World Tag Team Titles.

Happy: I am actually a fan when it comes to combining powerful singles guys to hold the tag team titles for awhile. Obviously you have to realize that tag team wrestling isn't what it used to be. And no matter how much us IWC guys whine and complain about the lack of tag team title matches and powerful tag teams in wrestling today, tag team wrestling will never be what it once was.

But when you get the chance to bring attention to the tag team titles by putting them around two of the biggest guys on your roster, then it's a pretty decent sign that you are at least TRYING to work some tag team wrestling into the mix. And with the Raw roster litereally overflowing with big talents like Cena, Batista, Kane, JBL, Jericho, C.M. Punk and Shawn Michaels, the only way you can get all your maineventers on the same card is booking them in multi man or tag team matches!

Not to mention that apparently the WWE really is going to go forward with these two in a one on one, non title match at Summerslam with only 2 weeks of build, which I think is a bad idea and means more than likely this match will end with a double DQ which will disappoint a lot of people since the majority of common wrestling fans will likely buy Summerslam simply to watch these two go at it.

This very same scenario worked for John Cena a couple years ago when he won the tag team titles with Shawn Michaels, leading up to their classic matchup at Wrestlemania. Right before the big match, one partner screws the other causing them to lose the tag titles, and the matchup gains some meaning and some aggression, rather than two good sports one uping the other week after week.

So due to the short time spent building the match, this tag team title reign all but guarantees this program will continue on through Summerslam, maybe even culminating in a huge match at Survivor Series. Which I believe will benefit the program tremendously. It gives Cena and Batista something to do while the WWE continues to push C.M. Punk on the audience while giving the show a fresh new creative look.

On top of that, when Cena and Batista DO lose the titles, likely to a younger tag team, that tag team should have NO problem getting over, which should give a decent boost to the tag team division.

Go Sucky: There are a couple problems that I really don't like about this. First, to quote the Barenaked Ladies, it's all been done! (Wooohoohoo). We just did this a little more than a year ago with Cena and HBK. It worked, but will it work again in such a short amount of time.

I also hate that they ruined the team of Dibiase and Rhodes. I know that the team is gone or done for just yet, but they just did a major heel turn for Rhodes and debuted Dibiase with a title reign. They showed a lot of promise as a cocky New Generation type of tag team, especially when they were getting involved with guys like Hacksaw Jim Duggan and Jerry Lawler. Speaking of which, I was pretty sure the WWE was looking to give Duggan and Lawler a title reign over these two, only to have Rhodes and Dibiase to regain them a week later. So what comes of that storyline now? Hacksaw never wrestled either one of them that I'm aware of. So that just seems like wasted time and a wasted angle. Not that anyone would have been happy about it anyway!

News: WWE and Hall of Famer Ric Flair have mutually agreed to contractually part ways. After an extraordinary career Ric has chosen to pursue opportunities outside of WWE.

Happy: Ric Flair can finally call it a career. He went out the way he wanted to, and the way he deserved too. He had a hell of a match during one of the most watched wrestling pay-per-views of all time. The man has spent his whole life bringing attention to professional wrestling and now, he can finally go home to his family, kick his shoes off, and say, "Hey, I did pretty good". No more traveling. No more hectic schedules. Good for you Ric. Enjoy yourself.

Go Sucky: Even with everything he did for the company, and the way the company APPEARED to be respecting his retirement, the WWE continued to flex its muscle to control The Nature Boy. They brought him in ONE time during the HBK/Jericho feud and one time to go WOOOOO during the Million Dollar Giveaway.

On top of that, it seems to me that Vince McMahon was trying to take all the credit for Ric Flair's career. Sure he spent a lot of time and did a lot of great things in the WCW and WWE, but Flair MADE his career in the NWA. And the NWA has wanted him to attend several events, including their Hall of Fame, which Vince of course has said no to. Flair is missing out on several opportunities due to that contract and getting out of it was the best thing for him. Now he can truly go where his career was appreciated and earn all the honors he deserves while earning a lot of money over the next couple of years for all the indy appearances he'll make.

The WWE missed several opportunities to continue to use Flair. It would have done them a LOT of good to promote his DVD. Sure the produced promos and commercials during the show were good, but how many people actually watched them? A lot of people tune stuff like that out, just because it FEELS like a commercial.

And then there was the manager role that many wrestlers DESPERATELY need. Flair in someone's corner would instantly make them a future WWE Champion. Instantly. But all that is lost, for now anyway.

Flair has said he and the company parted on the best of terms and that both parties are being respectable about it. So I wouldn't rule out a possible return. In fact, given that Flair is missing out on about 500,000 a year, and his business out of business, I'd say Flair will be back sooner than anyone thinks.

News: Brock Lesner hinted that he may be interested in returning to wrestling, but only if they "pay me big to come back".

Happy: The WWE could probably benefit from getting a guy like Brock Lesner back. He's still young and still in great shape. Look at Y2J's return. That was likely the top headline of 2007. If the WWE were to promote his return in a way similar to Jericho's, I think it would catch a lot of peoples attention.

Not to mention it might tap in to some of UFC's audience. Brock Lesner has made some headlines in his career with the UFC. Not exactly GOOD headlines, but headlines nonetheless, so people know who he is. And they may tune over to see what he does next.

Then again, it may bring over some old WWE fans who hear about his return, and be like, "Hey, I remember watching that guy back in the day!"

The only problem here, is will the WWE shell out the "Big Money" he's asking for to a guy who let them down and tried to sue them years ago.

Go Sucky: Brock Lesner apparently has ADD. He can't sit still and he can't focus on one career before worrying about what he's going to do next. He left the WWE for the NFL. That didn't keep his attention so he went to Japan and won a title there. Then he got bored with that and left Japan, taking the title with him. Then he decided he wanted to do UFC. He got his ass kicked once, and if he loses again, he'll probably get cut again. And now, before he is even finished with UFC, it looks like Brock has already lost interest and is ready to complete the full circle.

Sure a lot of people would be happy to see Brock Lesner back in a WWE ring, but Brock hasn't done himself any favors by staying away for so long. The WWE is a different product than it was 4 years ago. I don't think as many people would be supportive or as excited as they were with Jericho's return.

Then there's the trust factor. After watching him bounce around and screw company after company, do you really want to invest millions of dollars in a guy who can't seem to complete a single contract he signs? Brock Lesner is bad business. Pure and simple.

News: There has been talk about breaking up LAX. Both Homicide and Hernandez are against the split and are fighting it. Dixie Carter is a big fan of the group, which is why they received a renewed push and the tag titles. Some feel that Hernandez could be a top star, but that he would need a mouthpiece. Also many feel that his weaknesses are covered up in the tag setting by Homicide.

Ok I really can't believe that Hernandez would be a bigger star than Homicide. But I really think it's a horrible idea to split them up, especially after making the claim that 2008 is the year of LAX. So far, it has been. This is by far my favorite and the best tag team in TNA. Splitting them up basically takes away the only true tag team out there. And by splitting them up, you basically lose one of the two. VERY rarely will both members of a tag team make it to the top. In fact, I can't recall one single tag team that saw both men reach elite status. So what happens here is either Homicide becomes a big X Division star, or Homicide becomes a big heavyweight star while the other, similar to what happened with Chris Harris and James Storm when AMW broke up, will fall into midcard jobber despair. It's really just not a good idea right now.

News: Tomko and Dustin Rhodes have left TNA.

Happy: I'm not exactly sure why Dustin Rhodes was ever in TNA in the first place. Sure he was bitter about losing the Golddust character, but there were many things for him to do in the WWE, especially now with Dusty running FCW and Cody a big part of Monday Night Raw.

And the whole Black Reign character was just awful. Nobody really wanted to see him make out with a rat.

By the way, another monster bites the dust. Is TNA candycoating it's wrestling like the WWE did? All the monsters, Relik, Judas Mesias, Black Reign, they're all gone now. Abyss isn't using weapons anymore and isn't allowed to use thumbtacks. What's happening here?

Go Sucky: Tomko is a huge loss for TNA, but it's his own fault. Similar to Brock Lesner, Tomko can't make up his friggin mind what he wants to do, so he tried to do both. And Tomko unfortunately couldn't prioritize what was most important. Tomko unfortunately chose the wrong answer in respect to his TNA career by choosing to go to Japan during their fanfest a few months back, which landed him a suspension and hot water. So now he's finally free to go back to Japan and work for them where honestly, Tomko has probably seen more success than he did in his WWE or TNA career.

But unfortunately, not everyone watches what happens in Japan. And all the success in the world for a company nobody knows about doesn't mean anything if you're trying to make it big for a company like the WWE.

By the way, I'm sure TNA is feeling the video game curse already! Tomko is in the TNA Impact game. It seems like everytime a video game is released, a wrestler is released right before or right after the release.

Speaking of the TNA video game.

News: Shark Boy was added to the TNA video game.

Happy: Say what you will about Sharky, but he's one of the most original characters ever. And he's NEVER been in a video game! Now I can finally take Shark Boy to the top and have him beat Kurt Angle and Samoa Joe for the TNA World Title!

I'm actually pretty pumped up about this game. I feel like TNA and Midway have been dangling this game in front of me for years. I love the Raw vs. Smackdown video games and get the new one each year for Christmas. But to have something NEW like this game excites me. And if they're putting guys like Shark Boy in the game, then I know that the game is going to be worth the wait!

By the way, if you're wondering who's in the TNA Impact game so far, the known roster list is as follows:

AJ Styles
Samoa Joe
Booker T
Sting
Kurt Angle
Christian Cage
Hernandez
Homicide
Jay Lethal
Rhino
Tomko
Jeff Jarrett
Abyss
Scott Steiner
Chris Sabin
Alex Shlley
Eric Young
Christopher Daniels (No, Not Curry Man)

Go Sucky: Supposedly, the game will only have 25 wrestlers on it. So with guys like Petey Williams, James Storm, Robert Roode, Sonjay Dutt, Team 3-D and all of the TNA Knockouts missing, there's going to be a lot of unhappy fans.

By the way, this video game has also apparently created a SPOILER!! Don't read the next paragraph if you don't want to know!

**SPOILER**




The game also leaked some footage out of a character in an outfit very similar to what La Parka wears. Many people felt that this meant TNA was going to have the "Create A Character" mode. When asked about it, Midway wouldn't respond, until they finally released the information that the character on the video game was in fact an individual already on the TNA roster.

So the speculation is this character, who wears a mask and will dress in like a skelton costume, is going to be a character portrayed by none other than the "departing" Kaz. The character will likely join up with Super Eric, Shark Boy, and Curry Man. Oh joy!





**END OF SPOILER**




News: Brent Albright defeated Adam Pearce for the NWA Heavyweight Championship.

For anyone who may have read The Crystal Ball a couple years back when I was covering Ohio Valley Wrestling, you know that I personally know Brent Albright. He did an interview with me prior to getting called up to the WWE as Gunner Scott for 411mania and actually used some of articles I wrote about him on his official website. To say that I am happy for Brent Albright is an understatement. The man is one of the most underrated wrestlers out there today and I'm really glad to see the NWA and Ring of Honor using him wisely. Brent, if you're still reading the site man, I'm proud of you. Congratulations Shooter!


Rapid Fire

News: The Life & Times of Mr. Perfect DVD was supposed to be released yesterday, but has been delayed until September 9th now. No reason why was given.

I can tell you exactly why they've delayed it. Looks to me like the WWE is ready to call up his daughter, Amy, who has been training in FCW and with Harley Race. That'd be a PERFECT way to promote a DVD that I for one, have on my wish list.

News: Raw got a rating of 3.4.

I credit the decent rating to Santino calling the new Raw G.M. "Mike Adamthelay".

News: WWE's Saturday Night Main Event only drew in a rating of 0.8 for Males 18-34.

That's painful right there. But that's what happens. The show was generic. There was little to no promotion. Nobody cared or even knew it was happening. Besides, it's a Saturday during the summer right before many schools start back up. There were a LOT of better things to do than sit around and watch a generic wrestling show.

By the way, you want to know just how bad that rating is. AM Raw did a 0.6. Ouch.

Until next week my friends, as long as my ratings are better than SNME's, may your lives be Happy…or Go Sucky!