Lansdell's Sunday Brunch News Report 09.21.08

Posted by Chris Lansdell on 09.21.2008

Sonny Siaki is a great man. We've got your RoH results, your Jeff Hardy and Jake Roberts news, and a look at some sad TNA news, but Sonny Siaki deserved his own sentence.

Greetings, humanity! Welcome to Lansdell's Sunday Brunch, back after a hiatus. Thanks to Dustin James for doing an awesome job of covering last week, complete with the cheese-filled goodness of the format you know and love. How do I know you love it? Well, you're here!

We've had some interesting occurrences over the last 2 weeks, including a new World champion (boo), Sheik Abdul Bashir toning it down and cutting a far better promo this week after winning the X-Division title, a weird Impact that was shit from a wrestling standpoint but awesome from an angle-development one and a Maryse match that did not suck. Gasp. Not a ton of news this week, but enough that we should probably cut with the pleasantries and go right to it. BANNER!




The Spread~!

Sonny Siaki for Wrestler of the Year


Jeff Hardy will…not…fly!


The Week in Links!


WWE Endangered list!


Random Video Interlude!


Kurt and Karen to split


Espresso Shots!


RoH PPV Results


The Tip Jar!

For a change, some heart-warming news
Sonny Siaki reminds everyone that family comes first

I've always thought that Sonny Siaki, who had a decent upper midcard run in TNA and was given a developmental contract in WWE, had something special. He wasn't the best I'd ever seen in the ring but he certainly had talent in that area, and he oozed charisma. When he parted ways with WWE I was surprised, since I figured he had it in him to be the next great find. As it turned out, he shot himself in the foot in that regard, and subsequently disappeared from mainstream wrestling until this week.

The news that Siaki is abandoning all hope of getting back to big-time professional wrestling in order to save his brother Bernard's life is, to me at least, the best wrestling story of the year. It may seem like a no-brainer to some, but it couldn't have been an easy decision. Sonny has dreamed of being a wrestler all his life, and for him to give that up speaks volumes about his character. We don't get enough good news stories as wrestling journalists, so when they do come up I feel they deserve to be highlighted. Bravo, Sonny. Best of luck and of health to both you and your brother for years to come.

The Siaki family have partnered with The First Church of the Nazarene in Wilmington, NC to start a fund for Bernard's very expensive treatments. If you can, I urge you to contribute. When one man gives up his life's dream to help another, how can anyone who has the means not give up $5 to help? You can visit this website for more information.

If WWE and/or TNA have an ounce of decency between them, they will give this some airtime. It would probably work better on TNA, since he was well known to that audience, but WWE could use their considerably larger exposure to at least put it on their website. It would give them some positive press, especially if a promise to match donations accompanied the exposure. Or they could let some of their talent perform at a benefit show for the family, should such a show be organised. With wrestling being dragged through the mud these days, something like this would only help improve its image.



Over-react much?
Jeff Hardy is removed peaceably from a flight, and the IWC explodes in speculation

I guess "wait and see" are words that we hate, huh? Midway through this week, news broke that Jeff Hardy had been involved in an "incident" at Nashville airport. No details were forthcoming right away, but it wasn't long before the less reputable news sites started saying that Jeff was led away in handcuffs. Instantly message boards everywhere were scrambling for more bandwidth as the "EPIC FAIL", "WWE would like to wish Jeff Hardy all the best in his future endeavours" and "Stupid crackhead" messages started. I'll admit that I was worried upon reading the news, but given the propensity for airline and airport staff to err on the side of caution (read: "be anally retentive") in this "post 9/11 world" (God I hate that phrase), I hoped this was a case of an overzealous staffer.

In quick succession, Matt Hardy posted a blog entry referring to the trip, saying he had been with Jeff but not mentioning any incident, and information came out from The Tennesseean to once and for all put the fearmongers to rest: there was no altercation, handcuffs were not involved and he was not carrying drugs. Staff wanted to deny him boarding as he looked "intoxicated", and he offered to take a later flight. He left on his own with no trouble or fuss.

We really should all stop and take a deep breath when stories like this come up. Jeff Hardy has made his mistakes, and I really don't think he's stupid enough to get himself fired just when Vince appears ready to put the ball back in his court. By all reports Jeff got a huge wake-up call when his trailer burned, and saw it as a metaphor for his career: something he worked so hard for gone in an instant. Some have said that public intoxication is mentioned in the Wellness program as an offence that could result in termination, which is not strictly true. The program talks about being drunk before performing. Either way, Jeff always looks intoxicated, it's just the way he is. Had he really been worse for wear, either Matt or Gregory Helms (who were both travelling with him) would surely have stayed with him.

Official line from WWE is that this is a non-issue. Which means we should let Jeff be at stop jumping on everything he does as "proof that he still has his demons".


The Week In Links
After all, what's a Sunday brunch without the paper?

The shows
Just like a TV Guide that's a week old

Wilcox's Raw Report Epic Fail rating: 2.6
Bauer's ECW Report Rating: 1.2
Csonka's Impact Report Rating: 1.1 . Shock.
Csonka's Smackdown Report.

Required Reading
Best of the week's editorials

Hubbard takes a look at CM Punk's reign.
Weyer looks at spots that outshone the matches around them.
Sarnecky has part 3 of the Shawn Michaels Story.
Chin also looks at HBK.




When did WWE become WWF?
Three wrestlers named as being on the "endangered list"...how accurate is it?

According to reports that surfaced this week, Mr Kennedy, Paul London and Chuck Palumbo are considered to be on the "endangered list" with WWE. Kennedy has been pushed an re-pushed, but each time he builds something up, he ends up hurt or suspended (or injuring the top star in the company). London and Palumbo have not been seen on TV in a while, apparently because Vince has cooled on Palumbo's biker gimmick and is just not interested in London who, despite acting classes, has no plan to get himself over.

Sometimes I despair at the other wrestling news sites who, in their quest to "scoop" everyone and get news, will often post stories that have only a loose basis in fact. I can just see someone sitting at home behind their computer, thinking about who hasn't been seen on TV recently so that this story could be released. It's nothing more than educated guesswork and I would be shocked if any of this came from a WWE source.

Now there may be some truth to the assertion, and if so then I think all 3 would be a loss. Palumbo should be given a tag partner to turn on in order to make people care about him, possibly teaming him with Finlay and having him accidentally nail Hornswoggle a couple of times before the full-on heel turn and maybe even pairing with Mike Knox. Paul London could have been inserted in the Jericho-Michaels feud to battle Lance Cade, but I think that would be a mistake. Instead, let him go back to Smackdown and face THE Brian Kendrick a few times. Kennedy...well, if he can stay in the ring long enough, he has the ability to be a star. It's a big "if" though.

Random Video Interlude!

From the Titanes del Ring promotion in Chile. I have more of these for the next few weeks, but I had to start with this. Revel in the awesomeness.



And you thought it was just an Angle
Kurt files for divorce from Karen as life once again imitates art

Some unfortunate news this week as we learned that Kurt and Karen Angle are divorcing. I only say it is unfortunate because I never enjoy hearing about families breaking up, but to be fair we don't know the home situation or the status of their relationship and this might be for the best. Reports from TNA sources have said that the two have been interacting very pleasantly backstage since the news broke, which points to it being more of a relief than an explosion of messiness.

Once again, wrestling has come between a family. Nancy and Kevin Sullivan split up when an on-screen romance became real, and I know they're not the only ones (though I can't for the life of me remember the others). Working so closely with a member of the opposite sex, travelling together and showing affection to each other in front of millions of people is a sure-fire way to create real sexual tension. Even if there is no extra-marital activity going on here, playing out a breakup angle can often bring real-life problems to the forefront. This is not a new thing and one has to wonder why the Angles would subject themselves to such a situation.




One-line looks at minor news

Jake Roberts claims his drink was spiked - He didn't notice it because of the 4 lines of coke he'd already snorted.
Pictures of digital HHH looking weak are taboo - Art imitating life?
Hulk Hogan training hard, Brooke says his body is tighter by the day - Well she should know...
Ryan Braddock was originally supposed to be JBL's cousin - It worked so well for Noble and Nunzio
TNA to start drug testing - TNA would like to wish Sonjay Dutt the best in his future endeavours.

Slow week.



RoH PPV Taping Results
Big title change highlights latest card

Quick 'n' Dirty Results, with my thoughts in italics.

Dark Matches:

"Brutal" Bob Evans d. Alex "Sugarfoot" Payne
Unusual for an RoH regular like Payne to job to a local guy, especially one that's been around for a while

Chasyn Rance of the YRR d. "The Littlest Lumberjack" Grizzly Redwood
The mini-push of the YRR continues. Grizzly Redwood is the gimmick that Mitch Franklin is playing, and is apparently full of comedy offence.

Sara Del Rey d. Jessie McKay
They can only have Sara squashing random females for so long. We want the MsChif rematch already!

Daizee Haze d. Madison Eagles via Mind Trip
I can't get into Haze. The Mind Trip is a great move, but the rest of her offence looks weak unless she's in with someone better than her.

"Addicted to Love" Rhett Titus d. Josh Daniels via reversed rollup
Titus is a heck of a find for RoH this year, he plays his gimmick perfectly and is comedy gold.

PPV Matches:

Austin Aries d. Delirious via the No Chancery.
The Aries-AotF feud has been going on for a while, but hopefully will end soon when Jimmy and Austin meet one-on-one, probably with Lacey returning. Post-match, Jacobs and Tyler Black put Aries through a table.

Erick Stevens and Brent Albright d. Adam Pearce and Eddie Edwards via half-nelson suplex from Albright.
News from the match suggests that Albright may have an arm injury, which does not bode well for his NWA title run. As of Brunch time this report was not confirmed. This was apparently a good match that helped establish Eddie Edwards as a legit player

Chris Hero d. Jerry Lynn via roaring elbow.
Not sure if this will make the PPV, but if it does then putting Jerry Lynn on it will help attract a few buys, although some reports mentioned him showing his age a touch.

Bryan Danielson d. Claudio Castagnoli and Go Shiozaki in a 3-way elimination match. Claudio was disqualified for ref killing, and Danielson eliminated Shiozaki via triangle choke.

Shame they went for the early Claudio elimination, but it continues his developing "I hate everyone more than I want to win" character. Danielson cut a promo post-match demanding a PPV title shot, which Nigel later accepted. I want to see this match, but the title match should be even better and will likely be the title change.

The Briscoes d. Kenny King and Jason Blade, Ruckus and Jigsaw, and Necro Butcher in a Scramble Tag Match, via springboard doomsday device on Blade.
From all reports, Necro looked dangerous here to set him up for Glory by Honor on Saturday. Briscoes winning was a requirement, but at some point the Vulture Squad are going to have to win again.

Nigel McGuinness d. Roderick Strong to retain the ROH World Title, via Tower of London.
Tower of London? Really? OK, wow. As you'd expect, this is being talked about as a very impactful, hard-hitting match that, while solid, was not great. That's fine, you can't wrestle 4-star-plus matches every time out. One to see, for sure.

Kevin Steen and El Generico d. Jimmy Jacobs and Tyler Black to win the ROH World Tag Titles via Assembly Line package piledriver/brainbuster on Jacobs.
Hell yes. Steenerico are incredibly over, and would be the best team in the promotion if not for the even more awesome Briscoes. Jacobs and Black are much better off as singles stars, so the straps needed to be moved anyway. Finally pulling the trigger for Steenerico was probably an easy decision, but one that will be popular nonetheless.

Sounds like one to see people, if only for the title change. They're rare in RoH, even more so now, they tend to happen only on PPV. If you've never seen RoH, this could be a good way to introduce yourself to the product.


The Tip Jar
Your thoughts from the week before last

Looks like some of you forgot your valium...

Idiot Punk Mark.

why don't you just name the column as Sunday Punk updates?

Posted By: Morrison y3k (Guest) on September 07, 2008 at 12:20 AM

i read your Foley hatred as actual butthurt. Even though you can't come to terms with it your a WWE fan and it pains you to see someone you thought would never go, do just that and go. Hey its okay keep on being a sad panda. Every one has been naysaying Foley since even before the match with Edge at Mania but every time he proves them wrong. Have a Nice Day.

Posted By: Tapp (Guest) on September 07, 2008 at 03:03 AM

Why don't you just name your column - I hate TNA.

This is the first critical comment I've ever posted sorry. You seem like a cock though.

Posted By: Harry (Guest) on September 07, 2008 at 06:26 AM

Well, you see, I didn't name the column "Sunday Punk Updates" or "I hate TNA" because, quite frankly, those names suck a lot worse than "Lansdell's Sunday Brunch". Besides, I don't hate TNA, and my butt does not hurt at all. I really didn't care if Foley left WWE, stayed, won their title or evaporated in a cloud of pink steam. For him to prove me wrong he'll have to stay out of the ring, and I doubt he will.

just a question, which "over the edge" do you want to see, 98 or 99? It's kind of creepy to want to own/see 99, don't you think?

Posted By: brsams (Guest) on September 07, 2008 at 01:24 AM

No, I don't think it would. I've never seen it and it would be interesting to watch the matches after the fall to see how the wrestlers are acting.

It might not be his finisher...but Human Tornado does a Dragon Punch.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65wsz-MzQsA

Posted By: BDL (Guest) on September 07, 2008 at 01:34 AM


Consequences Creed did a Dragon Punch on Johnny Devine a few weeks ago. I marked out pretty hard for it.

Posted By: SeanAltly (Registered) on September 07, 2008 at 02:31 AM

Tornado's versions always look week. Player Uno does the Punch-Out star punch, which is similar but not close enough. I missed Creed doing it, and this makes me sad. As an aside, Canadian indy wrestler Kenny Omega uses the hadoken motion as a setup move, and it rules.

"Get back to me when you don't need 80 pounds of padding to play rugby with forward passes."

No, you can get back to ME when you become a fan of a sport that doesn't feature overpaid girlie-boys who cry whenever somebody slides into them.

Red card? Yellow card? Just give them all vagina cards and call it a day.

Posted By: Drew (Guest) on September 07, 2008 at 09:51 AM

Wow. Someone hasn't been paying attention. Rugby is not football. Football is the one with the overacting. And before you start referring to football players as overpaid, I would suggest looking at the salaries of baseball players.

"If Benjamin wins: First off, we'll need a US Title tournament. I love tournaments. Then I'll need a defibrillator, since he will be the first black man to hold the WWE title"

The Rock will be very surprised to find out he isn't black.

Posted By: Guest#2540 (Guest) on September 07, 2008 at 04:43 PM

Technicality: The Rock is half-black, half-Samoan. This is a claim I've made many times, and someone always mentions The Rock. Then they mention Booker, who never held the WWE title.

Well boys and girls, that's enough for me. Randle, Clark, possibly Cook and of course JP are all in tomorrow. Looks for a preview of Smackdown vs Raw 2009 from me coming soon, guaranteed to contain no shots of Triple H being pinned by Kelly Kelly. Stay cool, rock hard.

Lansdellicious – Out.