The MeeThinks Friday FreeThinks: 10.03.08

Posted by John Meehan on 10.03.2008

SLOWEST. NEWS. WEEK. EVER!



Welcome back, all, and thanks for tuning in for your regularly scheduled week end dose of intrawebz 'rasslin optimism. Not exactly the best week for those precious few of us with money invested on Wall Street, eh? On the bright side -- when you're broke to begin with, there's little worth panicking over and pretty much nothing to lose ;) And in a related note (which might not actually be related, actually... seeing as how I know absolutely nothing about economics): now that the uberlender giants in Freddy Mac and Fanny Mae are going belly-up, perhaps our good friends on over at Sallie Mae student loans may not be all that far behind, eh!?

YAY FREE EDUCATION!!!

Hey, a boy can dream, right?

Ok -- on with the news...

Kungaloosh!


A Quick Note Before We Begin

I'm an avid reader of just about every column on this site, and I'm a huge fan of the work that the writers put into their weekly efforts all across the boards. Even if I don't always agree with each and every point made, there's really no denying that week in and week out, 411 offers up just about the single best coverage of professional wrestling that you're likely to find just about ANYWHERE on this world wide webz, and so my (metaphorical) hat goes off to my colleagues (thus exposing my terribly receeded hairline) for the fine work that they do. Bravo, men.

Every now and again, however, I do tend to stumble across a point here and there that I can't help but feel needs a bit more clarification and/or discussion, and so in the spirit of "slow news week," I thought it only fair to offer one such addendum as an added bonus to this week's regularly scheduled Friday FreeThinks.

So here goes nothing --

Ask 411 Wrestling column, my esteemed colleague Chris Lansdell fielded a reader question that has long plagued the hallowed halls of this intrawebz wrestling community we call home. In it, a reader named Ortin asked:

If Vince "gives the fans what they want" then why does he make wrestlers lose in their hometown (like Rey Mysterio losing a match in San Diego, or Jim Ross being humiliated in his hometown when Triple H "beat him up" in Oklahoma)?

The fans don't want to see that.

In reply, my good buddy Chris offered up a pretty logical explanation, saying:

No, they don't. However nothing brings the fans in like the possibility of a home town hero getting a big win, even though most "smart" fans know it won't happen. It's become a running joke actually, jobbing in one's home town. The last big win I can recall in a person's home town was Kurt Angle winning the WWF Title in Pittsburgh.

And for the most part, I think Lansdell hit it right on the head. What I've always thought, however (and what I'd like to add to this particular reply), is that Vinny Mac is actually making a ridiculously smart business move by jobbing out the hometown boy whenever he has the chance to showcase his skills in front of a hometown crowd.

Why for?

Simple booking 101, really -- in that your classic "hometown hero" will ALWAYS draw heat whenever (s)he is performing in front of the fans who grew up alongside of them. But on the flip side, your classic "villain" is ALWAYS looking for the latest and greatest way to up the ante with their heelish deeds, and fans are simply too savvy to accept such flagrant "cheap heat" heel tactics like insulting the local sports team or blowing your nose with the state flag of your host locale. Well, *most* of the time, at least.

So what happens?

Vinny Mac pits the "pride of [hometown X]" against his resident baddie-du-jour (knowing full well that the fans will be rabidly behind their local hero *regardless* of whether he wins, loses or draws), and he procedes to let the antagonist score a cheap win in the most devious of manners, AND at the most humiliating of venues to boot.

Cheap, humiliating win over local hero > even better than insulting the local sports team.

Since the babyface hometown hero will ALWAYS draw (good) heat in his home town (as Lansdell noted), Vince has nothing to lose by jobbing the guy out in front of the local fans, simply because he knows damned well that they'll pay good money for the promise to see their "local boy made good" the very next time he rolls back through their local area. In the mean time, Vin Man gets to throw some serious heat on the heel of the feud (who's nowhere near guaranteed to be as hated in any given venue as the hometown boy is to be loved), meaning he rolls out of "[local town X]" with a vicious new notch of villainy added to his rulebreaker belt, and so it's pretty much a win/win. Fans love their babyface all the more (yay sympathy vote and local pride!), and the heel walks out all the more dastardly with plenty of localized hatred to boot.

So yeah, there's MeeThinks on that one.

Oh right -- back to the regularly scheduled column!

Rock & Roll.



In this feature, we'll make a quick note of those mini-news story items that have either already been covered in greater detail by other writers, or that haven't quite yet materialized into full-blown mega stories of their own. In either case, these items seem to warrant a brief mention nonetheless so that we can keep better tabs on what all's developing (and -- in theory -- end up with a better perspective in the long run) along the way.

The Doghouse
WWE Front Office Employee Who was Dating Ric Flair (SD!) - Has drawn heat from fellow WWE workers for being seen with recently released Hall of Famer

Notes: This one doesn't even rate in the grand scheme of things, really. But still, it's kinda funny to see just how catty (petty?) things can be in this wacky world of professional wrestling -- so much so that a WWE front office worker (let's say "HR specialist," "secretary," or some other such offscreen role) actually landed in hot water with the company after being spotted in a TMZ video alongside former WWE star Ric Flair. Though the woman's name has not publically been released, the long and short of things is that many of her coworkers haven't taken all that kindly to the notion that one of "their own" would be seen canoodling with a guy like Flair (who had pretty much shot their nostalgia-based marketing efforts around him in the foot by asking for his release from the company earlier this summer).

DRAMAAAA!

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The Debuts
Lenny Lane (ECW)

Notes: By all reports, Lenny Lane's appearance on this week's ECW broadcast is thought to be a one-off occurance. The former WCW star is not believed to have signed a contract with WWE.

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The Departures
None

Notes: This week marks the second week in a row that not a single performer has been released from either a WWE or TNA contract, though part-time TNA performer Frank Trigg has been removed from current storylines for the forseeable future. With the recent downturn in the U.S. economy, however, MeeThinks an impromptu "fall cleaning" of rosters from both major North American wrestling companies may not be all that far off. Do keep in mind that almost one dozen TNA contracts are set to expire in the Spring of 2009.

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The Drama
Batista (WWE) - Rumored to be unhappy with his current role in WWE

Notes: Batista's beef with the WWE brass has been a long time coming. Apparently, The Animal was feeling burnt out and looking to take time off since WAYY back at WrestleMania XXIV earlier this year, but was convinced to gut it out on account of the number of injuries, suspensions, and retirements that were plaguing the company at the time (e.g. -- Ric Flair, Jeff Hardy, etc.). Batista agreed, and went through with his WrestleMania commitment (a lower-profile interpromotional bout against Umaga), though was reported to have been increasingly upset with how dramatically his stock within the company had fallen. The feeling on Batista's end is that regardless of the number of title shots he's being given, he has clearly been shuffled out of the main event picture, and is a longshot at best to regain the same level of star power he once had some three years ago when feuding against Triple H.

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The Disabled List
Marty Elias (WWE) - Taking time off from referee duties after hernia surgery
Frankie Kazarian (TNA) - Injured triceps, will miss up to four months

Notes: This is the first WWE official to be removed from regular touring duties as a result of injury since Tim White in 2002.

Kazarian is still on the TNA payroll despite his onscreen departure just over one month ago. Apparently, the plan for him was to redebut at the Bound for Glory PPV under the guise of "Suicide" in order to help cross promote the TNA video game, but these plans may be headed for serious revision now that Kaz is expected to miss some four months' time in order to properly rehab his torn triceps. This leaves the future of the Suicide character and the future of Kazarian's in-ring return in complete disarray, as the gimmick of a newly debuting masked mystery man could easily be given to any other wrestler on (or off) the TNA roster -- be that for a temporary basis (meaning that somebody else would wear the costume until Kaz gets better) or a permanent one (meaning that Kaz would have to find another gimmick upon his return). Only problem with an "interim-Suicide," of course, is that the character would have to stick around for some four months *without* Kaz under the hood... which could lead to a number of headaches on down the road. After all, if *I'm* just some "masked nobody" who's sporting a costume knowing full well that another dude is going to swoop right in, replace me, and take advantage of all of the momentum I'm able to manage from now through January? You bet yer sweet ass I'm not going to put my whole heart into getting that character over, simply because I know all too well that I'd only be letting somebody else reap the benefits of *my* four months of hard work.

On the other hand, TNA could just as easily wait until Kaz gets healthy before moving forward with the Suicide storyline altogether, but they run the obvious risk of it being completely dead on arrival from the moment out of the gate -- as the idea of promoting a video game some four months after its in-stores release may just be too little too late.






Yeesh! Talk about your slow news weeks, eh? On the bright side, there's a pay per view this weekend, ya' know!

Since news is so slow, I'll take a quick minute to offer up MeeThinks on each of the PPV bouts on tap for this Sunday's No Mercy card. (Hey, it beats gratuitous YouTube videos, right? No? Fair enough... scroll on down to the bottom of the column for a bonus one of those).

But as for the PPV, if I were a betting man, I'd say...

Rey Mysterio beats Kane. RAW's resident masked superstar is HELLA over with the kiddies, and one of the biggest reasons for that is absolutely attributable to just how unique and marketable the guy is. He's flashy, fast-paced and colorful -- and the mask goes a long way in helping to sell that whole "larger than life" superhero mystique that plays so gosh darned well with the little ones. In other words: stripping Rey Rey of his mask is pretty much a case of killing the goose that lays the golden egg. Mysterio is all sorts of money, and there is absolutely no reason why WWE would piss that away in a B-grade PPV loss to an opponent who's already seen his brightest days come and go.

Beth Phoenix keeps the gold, simply because the Glamarella tandem hasn't really done much of anything to prove their collective worth as champions since scoring those belts in the first place. Look at the long and not-so impressive list of who all Santino and Beth have beaten in the past several weeks: Deuce, D'Lo Brown, and... um... well, that's about it. As for who all they've LOST to? Kelly Freakin' Kelly (Kelly). That's not exactly a ringing endorsement of your reign of terror there, Glamazon. Candice needs a serious ass whooping if Beth is going to have any credibility as the "power" half of her relationship with Santino. Otherwise, she's just the dude with the bigger shoulders.

The Undertaker gets screwed via shenanigans, which should result in a (rare) PPV win for The Big Show. Let's face it folks, Show hasn't won himself an honest-to-goodness singles' match on a WWE pay per view in AGES (quite literally, he hasn't won a PPV singles match since returning to WWE altogether!), while 'Taker has pretty much run the table with his PPV appearances all year long (first in the Elimination Chamber at No Way Out, then against Edge at WrestleMania, then twice more defeating Edge at Backlash and Judgment Day, then a quick (screwy!) loss at One Night Stand, and then a Hell in a Cell win at SummerSlam). If WWE is looking to make Show a Smackdown! main event mainstay, then he's going to need a win sooner or later in order to justify his place on the card. Undertaker can certainly afford the loss (and shenanigans are almost guaranteed in order for the Dead Man to eat a clean 1-2-3), and so MeeThinks the Big Show should probably walk out the victor when this one is all said and done.

In RAW's battle for belt-chasing rights, I'm going to make the all too predictable bet that Batista is pretty much a no-brainer to become YOUR number one condender (for the umpeenth time!). Though he's received just shy of a dozen separate title shots over the past two years, Big Dave has all sorts of history with Shawn Michaels (against whom he split one win and one loss on PPV earlier this year), and could easily transition into a classic "good versus evil" championship chase against Chris Jericho. JBL has pretty much exhausted his use as a main event threat, and he's a much harder fit into RAW's current HBK/Jericho title picture as it stands (HBK has little to no history with Bradshaw whatsoever, and heel versus heel title programs are notoriously bad for business). As such, I just don't see him coming out ahead in his match against The Animal.

Matt Hardy is just barely one month into his run as ECW Champion, and so conventional wisdom pretty much assures us that he'll retain here. Unfortunately, there are no particularly credible ECW singles competitor title challengers waiting in the wings just yet (Mike Knox? Yeesh...), which means that we'll probably be in store for at least one final go 'round of Henry/Hardy even after the dust settles on Sunday's PPV. On the bright side, Survivor Series isn't all that far off, and ECW could easily hide their lack of a title match for the next PPV with a classic team battle showcase instead (say Henry, Morrison, Miz, Swagger and Knox versus Hardy, Evan Bourne, Ricky Ortiz, Dreamer and Finlay).

In a related note (terrible-though-unavoidable pun intended), Jeff Hardy is pretty much on his last lifeline when it comes to going for the win (title switch optional!) against Triple H. It's no secret that the younger Hardy boy is pretty much as close to a major singles' title as he has ever been, and WWE has long been building to a "respect" feud between Jeff and The Game in order to finally cement the Rainbow Haired Warrior (equally stupid nickname) as a bona fide threat to the WWE Championship once and for all. After months and months of "defying the odds," Jeff seems destined to *finally* silence his critics in short order with a big win over one of the company's single biggest stars. The question, of course, is whether WWE will have the cajones to go through with a title switch while they're at it (gotta' make sure the H's doesn't look "vulnerable or defenseless," after all). This one could be a starmaker, for sure -- and it'll speak volumes as to the company's plans for the future (you might even smell some serious WrestleMania implications when all's said and done here). I'm betting Hardy walks away victorious, but there's no guarantees that there'll be a (non)spinner belt over his shoulder to show for his efforts.

Finally, our feature contest will pit longtime rivals Shawn Michaels and Chris Jericho against one another in a true PPV rarity -- a ladder match for a World Title. HBK's resume in these sorts of battles pretty well speaks for itself, but he absolutely oblitherated Y2J in their last ("Unsanctioned") pay-per-view showdown, and so I've gotta' believe that WWE has set this sucker up so as to ensure that Chris Jericho will retain once the final bell is rung. Let's face it, Jericho's last run as WWE champ was totally derailed thanks to a clean and decisive win to HBK's real life running buddy in Triple H, and it seems as if the only way an uberbabyface like Shawn Michaels would ever accept (earn?) a win in a clear-cut contest like a ladder match would be to do so with an equally fair-and-square and decisive victory. Simply put, I think WWE knows that they've got a legitimate A-list heel on their hands with the new-and-improved Chris Jericho as Champion, and I just don't think that any of the parties involved (Michaels, Jericho or the WWE brass) have it in them to bury BOTH of Jericho's "blink-and-you'll-miss-it" title runs in such a no-nonsense fashion, lest they seriously compromise the guy's drawing ability as a top-level rulebreaker. All told? Keep an eye out for a screwy finish here, but put your money on Chris Jericho in what should be a tremendous match.


(Sorry for the all-PPV news report this week, folks. More "real" 'rasslin news when I come back in two weeks, I promise :-/ )




TNA Prepares for Second LIVE Impact Broadcast
Company Headed to Las Vegas

In the immortal words of my beloved (and now so recently departed) Adventurer's Club:

"Some days you eat the bear, some days the bear eats you. But ALWAYS dress for the hunt."

Though TNA's last foray into the realm of live broadcast television didn't fare nearly as well as the company might have hoped, it seems as if they are "try, trying again" -- this time from the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino, tentatively scheduled for Thursday, Oct. 23.

MeeThinks?

More power to 'em, sez I. Even though their rating took a tumble last time they stepped into the live TV arena, that's absolutely no reason to shy away from trying again. And the simple truth to the matter is that live television is an ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY step if they are ever planning on making the jump to a full-fledged and viable "number two" promotion with a legitimate shot at making a dent on the national scene. Though a venue like the Hard Rock isn't exactly known for its pro wrestling legacy, the bottom line is that it's a pretty recognizable place all the same, and it certainly couldn't hurt for the folks down in TNA-land to hitch their wagons to the Hard Rock's stallions 'o starpower, at least in the short run. It's a smart move to generate enthusiasm and casual fan interest, and (if it works) it could really pay off in setting a precedent for future live broadcasts to come -- which seem to be an inevitability in this day and age for TNA, especially now that the company is toyinw with the notion of adding more nationwide tour dates to their taping schedule.




Andre the Giant Movie to Hit Select Theatres Next Week
Low Budget Tribute Film to Open in U.S. on Oct. 10

From the realm of "you simply have to see it to believe it..."



Nothing to add (or see) here, folks... just keep shaking your heads and move along, thanks.



And With That, I'm Outta' Here

'Till next time, that'll do it for Mee. There's a pretty strong possibility I'll be AWOL next weekend on account of my dear old alma mater's Homecoming weekend, but I'll be sure to find a suitable replacement to pick up the old "cut and paste and make snide remarks as necessary" routine whilst I'm away. In the mean time, MARK YOUR CALENDARS, enjoy the Pats' West Coast revenge tour this Sunday, and always stay positive.

- Meehan

The National Domestic Violence Hotline : [phone]-SAFE.