The Sunday Brunch News Report Fill-in 11.16.08
Posted by Jarrod Westerfeld on 11.16.2008
Following the tragic, and horrific demise of Lansdell['s presence this week] you're left on a Sunday afternoon with the resident emo of the 411mania staff. I know, aren't you the lucky one?
Greetings, humanity! Welcome to this very special edition of a hijacked Sunday Brunch with yours truly. Lansdell won't be joining us this week as he had other important affairs to attend to, something involving a life and light and other items that don't in any way intrigue me as I am an introvert. But enough about why you're not getting your usual dosage of Lansdell and his cheerful disposition, it's time to suffer through my ramblings about things I'm just learning about as I'm writing – this should be fun.
Stealing the banner,
BAM~!
The Spread~!
Bringing Classic Back?
Return of a Hollywood Diva
The Week in Links!
Random Video Interlude!
Espresso Shots!
Lucha Hypocrite
ROBBING The Tip Jar!
Bringing Classic Back? A lot of talk circles around Christian Cage possibly leaving TNA as talks of a WWE offer is apparently on the table.
It feels like it's been a long year of speculation surrounding the situation with Christian Cage and his position within the TNA company. Last year there was a tiny bit of hype surrounding Cage having signed a three year deal with the company and now, this year, we're talking about him possibly having spent his moments on TNA television receiving a beat down from the Main Event Mafia as a kayfabed send off. Now there's news that there might already be a WWE offer on the table for Jay Reso should he actually decide to leave the company he ran off to 3 years earlier when it was speculated that the WWE had low-balled him on his contract renegotiations. What in the world is going on here?
First TNA lost Gail Kim when a WWE offer was made to the former WWE Women's Champion and TNA Knockouts Champion at a point when it was perceived to have been a safe period in time for the company. It seemed that they could only further grow and expand their roster as they continued to gain notoriety through their deal with Spike TV only for their strongest face of the Knockouts division to suddenly leave the spotlight as a better deal was on the table. Now the same could be thought to happen to Christian Cage, but luckily for TNA they saw this well enough to at least have written Christian out of their storylines should he end up back in Connecticut.
This isn't the first time we've had heavy speculation about a TNA contract running up nor is this going to be the last time we see the rumour-mill speculate about the status of a TNA contract. After all, it was only last year that many of us were jumping for joy at the prospect of Alex Shelley's contract expiring in late Summer of last year only for notes to come out that his contract wasn't to expire until this year. The questionable months rolled by without a peep, low and behold Alex Shelley is still with the company with neither an extension nor a renewed contract just further speculation around the structure of the TNA contracts. After 3 years of seeing this company hued in the spotlight of a national syndicated cable television network we're still questioning how they run their business.
There's no true certainty that Christian could be leaving the company as this could all have been TNA's attempt to spice up a storyline that didn't have much of a role for him. This could end up being as big a chaser story as Shelley's contract expiring last year and Joe's contract expiring this year. One possibility is that TNA could reach an agreement with Christian much in the way they did with Nash earlier this season, making all of this talk of Cage abandoning ship fade off as a distant memory. I'm personally not ready to sign off on a Cage ship jump, but then again I wasn't buying into Christian signing with TNA as soon as he did [back in 2005] so what do I know?
Return of a Hollywood Diva Melina returns from injury to work her first match back on television – on FCW
The good news for the WWE Divas division this week comes from Florida Championship Wrestling where Melina made her successful return from injury, working a mixed gender tag match. Teaming up with Tyler Reks to take on Alicia Fox and Jake Gabriel in a bout that'll probably air on FCW's show, and for those results you'll probably want to wait and check out Michael Melchor's report.
This is very good news for the WWE as any loss on their roster due to injury is a devastating loss. While Melina's return isn't big news in comparison to the return of John Cena, but her presence allows for the Divas division to regain yet another face to help in the fold of competent face challengers for Beth Phoenix's title. It's also very good news for those of you who have grown to miss her special entrance, a favourite for three years running. No matter what, this is a win-win situation for everyone – there are no losers in this news.
And just a reminder as to how valuable Melina is to the wrestling public, I provide to you all this reminder:
All that and you get keep your dollar bills to yourself.
The Week In Links After all, what's a Sunday brunch without the paper?
The shows Just like a TV Guide that's a week old
Csonka's Raw Report gives you the play-by-play of the Jericho and Michaels last man standing match, and so much more. Bauer's ECW Report hypes up the Hardy and Finlay ECW Championship collision as being ECW's Match of the Year, go see the hype. Rutherford's Smackdown Report sells us on Jeff Hardy's promo skills and much, much more.
I'll continue the trip down memory lane and present to you all some nostalgia from the then WWF, as you have the pairing of the greatest tag team spanning three decades teaming up with the wildest, most unpredictable World Heavyweight Champion in the history of the company. Enjoy.
Is anyone else trying to figure out what Demolition would look like had Nikita Koloff joined the WWF when they snagged up Darsow, now?
One-line looks at minor news
RVD to appear on Hogan's CMT CCC show teaching the "celebrities" the art of the finishing move - Everyone will be high during that lesson. WWE helps out Florida family who was scammed and burnt out of their home - Family expected to get sympathy from the fans, but eventually depushed after failing the upcoming drug test. WWE announcing New Orleans Raw main event a triple threat for the World Championship - Title now expected to change hands at least 5 more times before this one...or is that just a Nitro trademark? TNA having issues with fulfilling orders on Jarrett special - TNA: we care about our fan's money... Paul London finally released from WWE - Expect Evan Bourne to get his former leash, and then cut from the company by 2014. TNA continues to promote their open invitation to Sarah Palin to appear at their shows - No word on if they can secure her a hotel room that allows her to see the Epcot Center from her bed.
Lucha Hypocrite Some talk about why CMLL may be hurting right now in the looming shadow of WWE's growing global domination.
For those of you who don't care for any company not titled WWE or TNA you may now freely jump ahead of this column to the next topic because we're talking a little bit of lucha libre here, particularly the woes of the once mighty CMLL. It wasn't that long ago that CMLL was capable of drawing the same kind of figures that the average WWE pay-per-view pulls in, its dominance over AAA was assured and one could look at this company as being the most progressive company in Mexico with its capability to build new stars. Now this company is in the dire ditch of having to rebuild faith in its lost fan base, and in their own locker rooms.
As the story goes, El Hijo del Perro Aguayo supposedly left the company to form up his own independent wrestling company which he billed would have better wrestling than that of his former employers. For him the decision was based upon the lack of new stars being generated by the company in a time when the shift between the two lucha powers began to align in favour of AAA. It seems a noble deed upon his part, to leave the company in favour of generating a new future for lucha libre but the issue seems to fall flat upon its face as EHPA states that his promotion is going to feature many CMLL stars as the main focus of his company. How this move helps the future of Mexican wrestling is beyond me, but the woes don't end there.
Apparently Dr. Wagner Jr was approached with the idea of returning his character to a heel direction. While AAA heats up with a storyline that features head writer Konan, CMLL felt some character adjustments might be the way to go, unfortunately for them Wagner claimed that he'd only turn heel if Atlantis turns face.
These all seem to be enough of a mounting issue that is hurting CMLL and it certainly doesn't help that the WWE and TNA have arrived on Mexican television, further giving fans more options to choose from. A company that was once capable of drawing up to 15,000 people on just about any given show is now struggling with figures of about 500 individuals and it could spell out disaster for a lot of talents who probably won't have a career option in AAA.
It seems the bulk of these issues sprang up in the midst of Mistico's down time from injury and with his returns having occurred last week, if I'm not completely mistaken, one has to wonder if even the mighty Mistico can salvage the image of this fledgling company. Of course, in order for Mistico to save CMLL the company would have to better protect him from the prying eyes of TNA and the WWE, especially given that Rey Mysterio has been one of his more vocal backers for a legitimate shot in the company. CMLL probably can't afford to lose any more talents for any reasons and the biggest blow could come at the hands of their reluctance to really place a glass chamber around Mistico, preventing him from going off into the states to make a name for himself there on the backs of a nationally syndicated promotion.
But for the sake of argument, I could be wrong on some of this information and my opinion could just be more Chicken Little-ing from the devout cynic of the 411 writing staff. Take from this what you will, and keep a grain of salt handy.
ROBBING The Tip Jar And now for something completely different...
I forget when it was, but sometime during this month John Cleese appeared on Countdown with Keith Olbermann and it suddenly sparked up all of the memories I've had of Monty Python's flying circus. The sheer randomness of certain sketches and the humour of the unexpected have always been appealing to me. That would probably explain my circle of friends and the constant remarks we make about fruits, or that could have nothing to do with randomness so much as it does latent homosexuality. I don't know, someone else judge that one for me because I've got comments to respond to.
"The attempt to blame buy rates for the entire quarter on the Olympics, which affected one PPV, is not washing with me."
They blamed SummerSlam's drop on it as the same thing happened in 2004, according to Meltzer's site.
And of the two other PPVs in the quarter, one went down (Great American Bash) and the other went slightly up (Unforgiven).
Posted By: Guest#2226 (Guest) on November 09, 2008 at 12:09 AM
You sound like the lack of the mentioned wrestlers on it is a bad thing. Aside from Dibiase and Bourne who of the group is nothing more than a curtain jerker? I doubt people are gonna riot if Maryse or The Burchills aren't on the game.
Posted By: Michael (Guest) on November 09, 2008 at 10:42 AM
It's all about variety, good friend. Sometimes the best option for some is the least popular for others, so why not invest in giving the smaller markets some of the lesser cared for workers of the WWE roster? They must still have some fans – shit, if Chris Harris can still have fans despite his constant dependency upon tampons, then why can't the Burchills be in a game that hasn't really evolved its mechanics since Here Comes the Pain?
Fans and guys with a family history in the business tend to be the ones who stick, so why do they go for others?
Well for starters the average fan on the indys is what vince would consider a Runt, and while many of them are awesome (ROH!) most wrestling fans who get into wrestling are average at best and not big enough or charismatic enough for WWE.
also Vince can't force past superstars to breed and raise their children with an urge to follow in Dad's footsteps. If he could be %100 sure that he could get a second generation superstar out of his old talent, he'd pimp out the Diva's to them.
Hell I'm damn sure that he's trying to get Triple H 2.0 out of Steph, and is frustrated that she's got pregnant twice and has yet to produce a son!
Posted By: Davis (Guest) on November 09, 2008 at 12:33 PM
The only one who is upset that there isn't a Triple H 2.0 already rummaging through the papers in search of his segments and the notes upon his push is Triple H. I doubt Vince cares enough about building a stage full of second generation stars so much as he is furthering his product in the direction of a entertainment heavy based one. And as it turns out Vince's investment in ROH talents has seemingly paid off well thus far as Kendrick is proving to be a reliable act, Punk is looked upon as a bright model for how his wrestlers should act in regards to extracurricular activities that a certain Jake Roberts would have proudly partaken as though he were training for the Olympic level for, and Evan Bourne is certainly sparking up heavy interest with fans. Perhaps Vince going to the well of "vanilla midgets" isn't such a bad thing – I mean, he did manage to make Eddie Guerrero, Chris Jericho and Chris Benoit mega stars despite their lack of size and, in some regards, character.
Linda said that TNA is as much competition as any other form of entertainment.
This is a putdown. She is talking how WWE competes with everything that is on TV and not how WWE is only against TNA. Because if it was only against WWE vs TNA the WWE Still doesn't care about TNA.
Posted By: Guest#2190 (Guest) on November 09, 2008 at 03:03 PM
Just for the record...I haven't a clue as to what the fuck it was you just said, but I'll nod and agree if it means I don't have to endure the explanation.
Hey Lansdell, your banner is the best! Seriously, I first started reading this column so I could see the banner every week. Anyway, I fully agree with your rant. I can't stand how they're saying it's the 25th anniversary either. It's the 25th show! But, you're off about the birthday thing. Birthdays and anniversaries have the same numbering, so this is really the 24th birthday of Wrestlemania, just as it's the 24th anniversary. Just a clarification.
Posted By: quattre777 (Guest) on November 09, 2008 at 08:54 PM
I just really want Lansdell to stew in the burn that is his being wrong. Hey, the guy that couldn't read an ROH report about their first Toronto show finally has a little something over Lansdell and I intend to milk this for all it's worth. Don't judge me just because I'm completely petty.
That'll do it for me this week, but before we go I have one other image to share with you all:
Stay tuned next week when Lansdell will assuredly return to tear me a new one for ruining his beautiful, beautiful column.
Dear lord that banner at the end is glorious.
Im waiting for Christian to be signed to the WWE so that people can bitch about him not being on SD vs Raw 09....
Posted By: Brad (Guest) on November 16, 2008 at 12:28 AM
What? Christian isn't in SVR09? WWE sucks!
Posted By: Red (Guest) on November 16, 2008 at 02:37 AM
Aww man I only bought SvR09 so I could play as Christian!
Also, did RVD resign or was it just a one time deal?
Posted By: Richie (Guest) on November 16, 2008 at 07:34 AM
Well, hopefully no one ever asks you to fill in for them on their news reports ever again! Your "style" (that I love so much) is more suited for the opinion columns/ranting BS you subject this site to every Tuesday or Wednesday -- I can't remember which since sometimes the voices in your head just won't allow you to sit down and actually do your job!)
More rambling, incoherent nonsense that is allegedly considered good, "intellectual" writing. Remember, punctuation is your friend :)
Posted By: Dave (Guest) on November 16, 2008 at 11:53 AM
I recently saw a Chikara DVD that had Demolition in it (just Axe and Smash). While they could probably kick my a$$, MAN, are they looking old! They also had an old, slimmed down One Man Gang who can barely move.
Posted By: Whiteburbia (Guest) on November 16, 2008 at 05:12 PM
The cat pushing the watermelon out of the lake is the greatest thing on 411mania! Instant CLASSIQUE!
Posted By: Steve Gustafson (Registered) on November 16, 2008 at 06:30 PM
Thats the first time I have seen that picture of Melina...she needs to return NOW!
Posted By: APrince66 (Guest) on November 16, 2008 at 07:14 PM
"Also, did RVD resign or was it just a one time deal?"
You're douchebaggery is staggering.
Posted By: alex (Guest) on November 16, 2008 at 07:27 PM
I do hope Christian jumps back to the good old shit, uhm, ship.
Seriously though, his options in TNA have been exhausted. If he was to go back to the WWE, we could possibly see a tweaked up Christian, from when he was last there being sent on his way out with a loss to Hardcore Holly, enter new and fresh programs with his brother Edge, to name just one that I would be very interested in seeing.
Interesting thoughts on the potential shift that could continue going on within the ranks of the WWE. I am speaking of this notion that physiques are so pertinent, that if you sport one and look good, you can still get over even if your Batista. On that note, do you think Low Ki could have a good career in the WWE? I've always thought Low KI has really made up for his lack of stature with his stiff shots (I would like to see those turned down a notch for the welfare of his opponents) and dedicated presence. There's even an element of spirituality within him which all adds up to me being able to buy Low Ki as someone who can hold his own ground with a larger opponent.
Having recently lost a dark match to Carlito's brother (Bang goes his title reign in New Japan) perhaps we'll see a deal inked between the two parties?
Many thanks for an enjoyable read, and curse you for keeping me awake when I really ought to go to sleep.
-Oliver.
Posted By: Oliver Scott (Guest) on December 01, 2008 at 06:57 PM
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Bringing Classic Back?
Return of a Hollywood Diva
