The MeeThinks Friday FreeThinks 02.20.09

Posted by John Meehan on 02.20.2009

WWE're Off On the Road to WrestleMania!



Welcome back, folks. And thanks for tuning in for another rousing edition of a seven days' worth of 'rasslin news and commentary to close out the work week. As for the major developments? Well, there's been plenty of twists and turns over the past week's television, as the Road to WrestleMania officially kicked into high gear, while TNA's "Main Event" storyline seems to be headed in a completely new direction. Off-camera, rumblings of WrestleMania continue to dominate much of the rumor mill, while Vinny Mac attempts to crack down on "insider" leaks faster than you can say "little Dutch boy with his finger in the dike."

Yup, I just said "finger in the dike."

Rock & Roll.

The SELL of the week goes to everyone on the closing segment of RAW, each of whom sold their respective roles in the WrestleMania main event to absolute perfection. After receiving an Orton punt to the skull, Shane stared off vacantly into space -- desperately trying to gut it out before collapsing to the canvas. Shortly thereafter, Stephanie McMahon took an RKO from Orton and lied motionless for the remainder of the broadcast, while Orton's face told the story of a man who'd realized that he'd crossed the threshold of no return. And to close out the show? Triple H charged down to ringside looking legitimately concerned and as mad as we've ever seen him. Some might call it over-the-top, but for my money, it was a fantastic -- and very real -- start to RAW's WrestleMania headliner.

Ironically, the TELL of the week goes to Shane McMahon, who preceded his brilliant performance on Monday night's RAW with yet another display of some of the very worst punches ever shown on WWE television. Seriously, for as good as the last segment was, Shane-O's flimsy array of fisticuffs against Orton and Legacy darn near killed any and all credibility that his opponents may have had going into this "unsanctioned" fight to settle their beef once and for all. Had it not been for the brilliant work from all parties involved in the show-closing segment that followed, RAW fans would have left Monday's show with a bad taste in their mouths.

Did you catch a performance worth noting as a SELL or TELL of the week for next Friday's Column? Let us know! Eligible performances start with last night's iMPACT and span all the way through next week's ECW, so keep a sharp eye, and hit up the comments section below to submit yours today!



New and/or newly returning performers of the past week.

Stevie Richards - made his debut on TNA programming this week, where he appeared in a pre-taped segment in the role of Abyss's therapist.

Caden Matthews - local talent Caden Matthews made his ECW debut this week in a losing effort to fellow ECW newcomer Tyson Kidd. Matthews' appearance was a one-time deal, and he is not believed to have signed a contract with World Wrestling Entertainment.



Obituaries, retirements, and/or performers whose contracts have ended this week.

None - In a welcome development, no performers have passed away or retired in the past seven days. TNA continues to keep an eye toward eliminating a few members of their undercard talent, but no contracts have been terminated in the past week's time. Meanwhile, WWE looks to move forward to WrestleMania XXV with their newly streamlined roster after shedding more than a dozen full-time employees earlier this year.



Performers injured or suspended in the past week.

None - In a welcome development, no performers have gone down with serious injury or suspension over the past seven days.



Performers who've landed in hot water over the past week.

Daffney - a.k.a. TNA's "Governor Palin" - seems to have earned the ire of New Blood Championship Wrestling promoter Bobby Causby. This week, Causby began circulating a complaint against the newly signed TNA knockout, arguing that she had no-showed an event for his promotion scheduled for last fall in Forest City, NC. despite receiving his $250 check to appear at the event. According to Causby, Daffney cancelled her appearance at the last minute, citing a death in the family as her reason for backing out of the show. While the excuse is certainly a justifiable one (if true), Causby's complaint stems from the fact that Daffney never offered to return any of his money. Seeing as how a small claims court could settle this one in an afternoon, however, I'm just going to go ahead and write this one off as "typical carny nonsense" -- as this sort of "he said/she said" behavior of promoters screwing performers and vice-versa tends to run rampant throughout the independent circuit.

WWE "Insider Leaks" - have run afoul of Vince McMahon's good graces of late. Apparently, the WWE Chairman has been increasingly frustrated (paranoid?) that production team members (ring crews, camera operators, backstage employees) have become a little too loose-lipped of late, and the tipping point for his frustration came when sources within the WWE ranks all but confirmed that Christian would be returning to World Wrestling Entertainment in the "mystery assailant" role currently filled by one Matt Hardy, who was reportedly subbed in at the last minute in order to keep fans guessing. Vince's frustration with his staff has manifested itself in a number of curious ways of late, and the WWE ring crew was ordered to cover the entire Elimination Chamber structure with a giant masking tarp so as not to see the competitors warming up during their dry-run of the championship matches on the afternoon of the No Way Out PPV. Apparently, Vince didn't want the surprise of Edge competing in two matches ruined, nor did he want any other "insider" sources to score behind-the-scenes spoiler material like, say, this...




Developing scandals, scuttlebutt, and budding backstage rumors.

Scott Siegel - the actor who played the massive steroid dealer in the locker room scene of "The Wrestler" alongside Oscar nominee Mickey Rourke, was arrested on federal charges this week. After attempting to flee from police in Westchester, NY, Siegel was summarily charged with distributing steroids and assaulting a federal officer. In a tragic case of art imitating life and vice-versa, Siegel is the second member of "The Wrestler" cast to make headlines for all the wrong reasons in as many months, as his hulking co-star Paul Fuchs (a.k.a. "Paul E Normous" -- the guy with the giant snake tattoo) was found dead in his home on Jan. 19 of this year. Fuchs was 33 years old.


Hulk Hogan - is rumored to have been in talks with Vince McMahon regarding a possible match or appearance at this year's WrestleMania. Apparently, the initial plan was to have Hogan return for a one-on-one encounter with John Cena. However, this past Monday's RAW pretty well seems to guarantee us a WrestleMania match between Cena and Edge instead (which is probably for the better both in terms of workrate and fan reaction, as the kid-friendly and ever-polarizing John Cena would probably be all but dead in the water were he to square off against the likewise kid-friendly, 50-plus and even-MORE-polarizing Hulk Hogan).

Where this leaves The Hulkster is anyone's guess, though there have been early reports that Hulk might end up pairing off with Chris Jericho as part of his ongoing crusade against the fallen stars of yesteryear such as Mickey Rourke's character in "The Wrestler." Then again, the names of Ric Flair, Steve Austin and Mickey Rourke himself have also been thrown around for a possible WrestleMania feud with Jericho, and so it's pretty clear that there's still a lot of planning going on backstage for this one in the WWE think tank, and nothing's set in stone. Obviously, Hogan's inclusion on the card would steal much of the show's spotlight, as well as claim a slot that otherwise might be filled by another full-time performer. That said, Jericho's current angle all but guarantees us that he won't just be facing off against "another full-time performer," and the simple fact of the matter is that few wrestlers in history have the mainstream media crossover appeal of a man like Hulk Hogan -- which could attract more than a few casual/old-time fans to purchase the event simply on the basis of his inclusion.

To play devil's advocate for a second though -- let's assume for a second that Steve Austin is simply too broken down to step in the ring, and that Mickey Rourke himself will likewise shy away from an actual WrestleMania match. This would leave Jericho with the possible WrestleMania opponents of either a) Ric Flair, or b) Hulk Hogan -- arguably the two most popular wrestlers of all time. Even though both Hogan and Flair are past their respective in-ring primes, the high-profile nature of this WrestleMania payday would certainly do wonders to cement Jericho as the premier heel of his generation. So let's say for argument's sake that we end up with a WrestleMania XXV match EITHER between Jericho/Flair or Jericho/Hogan. This raises the ultimate question -- if forced to choose between one or the other (no fair copping out and saying "neither"): would your average fan rather see The Nature Boy return from retirement (thus cheapening his legacy by "tarnishing" his swansong from last year), or would they rather see one last WrestleMania payday from The Immortal Hulk Hogan (thus hogging all of the spotlight in typical Hulkster fashion)? In a sense then (and after all of these years!), wrestling fans are effectively being forced to choose sides in a WrestleMania match between Hogan versus Flair after all.

Again, it's all speculative at this stage of the game -- but worth considering, nonetheless (in my "dream" WrestleMania match for Jericho? Bret Hart, no question). In the mean time, however, it's probably best to take any and all rumors with a grain of salt as we file this one under "developing."


Verne Gagne, wrestling legend and WWE Hall of Famer, was named a suspect in the death of 97-year old Helmut R. Gutman, who died of complications stemming from an earlier physical altercation with the former AWA Champion late this week. The two men were roommates at the Friendship Village home, as both suffered from Alzheimer's Disease-related dementia.

Invariably, the fact that Gagne suffers from dementia has lead many fans and critics alike to compare Verne's case with the Benoit family tragedy of 2007, as an independent team of researchers in the Benoit case had determined that Chris Benoit had likewise suffered from brain damage similar to that of an Alzheimer's patient. That said, there seems to be a pretty clear difference between a brief and sudden outburst from an 83-year-old man who'se been *institutionalized* in order to treat his illness and a 40-year old professional wrestler who was, by all accounts, able to function in a perfectly normal manner right up until the weekend where he took both his own life and the lives of his wife and child in a brutal and ritualized fashion.

In short, though both stories are undeniably tragic, it is imperative to remember that Verne Gagne's case is not Chris Benoit's.



Recaps and thoughts on the onscreen happenings of the past week. For the purposes of this column's deadline, we'll focus on THIS WEEK's RAW and ECW broadcasts, and LAST WEEK's Smackdown and iMPACT!.

TNA iMPACT! (air date: Feb. 12, 2009) aired last Thursday evening, and pretty much wiped out all memory and threat from the TNA Front Line, as the show focused almost exclusively on the internal "meltdown" of The Main Event Mafia.

The show opened with a rematch of last week's iMPACT!, which saw Team 3D (whom announcers no longer acknowledge as part of the TNA Front Line) pick up a win over the Main Event Mafia tandem of Kurt Angle and Sting. For those of y'all keeping score at home, this was pretty much the third time in a week that we've seen these four men go at it. After the match, Angle and Sting's war of words escalated into a shoving match, leading to an in-ring altercation featuring the remaining members of the Main Event Mafia. Angle demanded that Sting lay down to forfeit the TNA Heavyweight Championship Title in the main event of the evening, which attracted the ire of TNA Founder Jeff Jarrett, who hit the ring to tell Angle that he wasn't going to allow such a disgrace as long as he was still involved with TNA Wrestling. Sting then interrupted Jarrett, totally cutting his balls off telling Angle that he'd honor his request at the close of the show.

Backstage, Booker T was asaulted by AJ Styles -- who raided the Legends' Champion's locker room and left the former World Champion lying as the show went to commercial. Still no word on whether or not AJ Styles is indeed fighting this guerilla war on behalf of his brothers in arms in the TNA Front Line or merely to launch a lone-wolf-style attack on The Legends' Champion in particular, however. Regardless, he seems poised to challenge for (and perhaps ultimately end up capturing) Booker T's Legends' Championship -- which certainly will help to keep him in the spotlight, if nothing else.

Back from commercial, Scott Steiner totally looked past Petey Williams stumbled through a backstage interview reiterating his confidence in the face of his pending war with that "half breed," Samoa Joe. Shame of it is? In addition to burying his opponent with a slew of borderline racist remarks, Steiner tripped all over himself throughout the promo, leaving the finished product to be an absolute mess.*

*Apparently, this interview occured "during the commercial break." Fun little fact, however (having been to an iMPACT! taping myself) -- while taped backstage interviews do indeed air for the live crowd in attendance, TNA television broadcasts actually air the *direct feed* of the interviews themselves and not the taped interview with the live crowd reactions when broadcasting to fans at home. As such, given the fact that TNA iMPACT doesn't actually air until a good three or four days *after* any given taping, AND the fact that they always make sure to eliminate all live crowd reactions whenever airing a pre-taped video segment anyways, one can't help but wonder just *WHY*, exactly, somebody from the TNA production staff didn't take the thirty or so seconds to re-tape the promo in post-production.

After the promo, Scott Steiner defeated Petey Williams in a "no disqualification" Headdress on a Pole Match, where the referee kept trying to stop Scott Steiner from getting disqualified the only way to win was to scale the corner ringpost and retrieve Big Poppa Pump's trademark chainmail. People tend to complain about these "item on a pole" matches, and I'll admit that they're usually pretty freakin' terrible -- but when you stop and think about it for a second, a match with an item "on a pole" is really not all that different from a ladder match, when it comes right down to it (save for the fact that one match type usually ends up slow and plodding while the other ends up fast-paced and high-risk). Perhaps the biggest fault in so many of these matches is simply the lack of build and the relative lack of importance of the items suspended on top of those poles. While racing to claim the headdress makes sense in the Steiner/Williams feud (basically, the guy who grabbed it would likewise gain sole ownership of the musclebound chainmail gimmick), it's not like they're racing for title shots, here. And the bottom line is that your average wrestling fan can pretty well tell you that even if he were successful in robbing Steiner of his goofy hat, Petey Williams gains a sum total of nothing by continuing to work out from under the confines of the ridiculous Big-Poppa-knockoff gimmick.

Perhaps he'd be better off seeking employment elsewhere. Hmm...

Back to live action, Samoa Joe appeared on the big screen after the bout, maintaining his intent to take out Scott Steiner with a "nation of violence." While I'm all for a badass Samoa Joe, this independent ass-kicker persona (or worse, the guy with a "nation" stable at his disposal) pretty much guarantees that he too is no longer affiliated with the TNA Front Line. On the bright side though, both Joe and AJ appear in strong positions to take out two of the Mafia's cornerstones -- which should manage to give these two young guys the rub regardless of heir standing with or indeed the very state of their earlier attempt at an ill-fated stable. Of course, one could argue that both AJ and Joe were already quite over *before* the entire Main Event Mafia/Front Line feud even began (and thus the angle has ultimately failed to create so much as one new star despite glomming up the better part of a year's worth of television), but let's give TNA the benefit of the doubt here and see where things all end up before we pass judgment on this one, yes? Even if the payoff to the Main Event Mafia storyline is that the group implodes and drives one another into retirement (the TNA roster would be much stronger without the sand-bagging or half-assing efforts of at least two of the stable's five members), there's still a change that the company might just end up making some lemonaid out of the lemons that they're currently offering audiences with the storyline as its unfolded so far.

But getting back to the show --

The TNA Knockouts took center stage for the next match, where Sojourner Bolt earned a shot at the TNA Knockouts Championship by winning a miniature royal rumble gauntlet match, last eliminating newcomer Madison Rayne. With a title shot in hand, Bolt now appears headed to a confrontation with her Kongterouge stablemate, Awesome Kong. Well, so much for *that* faction (Stables and/or tag teams that can actually manage to get along with one another seem to be at something of a premium in TNA these days, no?). No word yet on when, exactly, Bolt will challenge for the gold, but one would be hard-pressed to imagine it ending well for her membership in the Koungterouge. Then again, the babyface knockouts could definitely use some help (ODB seems otherwise occupied, while Roxxi and Taylor simply ain't cutting it)... and so maybe a Bolt ouster isn' exactly the worst thing in the long run.

In X Division action, the TNA Front Line continued their infighting, as the team of Lethal Consequences picked up a big win over their stablemates (perhaps in name only), The Motor City Machineguns. After the match, Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin appeared to have undergone a change of heart from their cocky and rulebreaking ways, leading to an in-ring handshake between all four remaining members of the Front Line (save AJ and Joe, err... Ray and DeVon... um, I mean Eric and Petey, plus ODB and Rhino). Of course, this about-face was short-lived, as Shelley and Sabin then proceeded to ambush their "buddies" with two well-placed low-blows to close out the segment.

Backstage, ODB's Angle featured an interview with TNA newcomer Brutus Magnus, who promptly walked off the set after wanting nothing to do with the date-seeking ODB. Also, fans learned that YOU TOO could win a date with ODB by visiting TNA's website. Suddenly, I find myself longing for the days of Monday Nitro parties.

Elsewhere on iMPACT!, Abyss was shown in a therapy session talking with a yet-unnamed counselor (played by Stevie Richards). Presumably, this will lead to a regular recurring role for the former ECW star.

In the next match of the evening, Beer Money Inc. defeated the team of the perpetual wheel-spinning Rhino (wasn't he the LEADER of the TNA Front Line as recently as just over one month ago?) and his monster partner, Abyss, thanks to a helpful chairshot assist from Abyss's former tag team partner, Matt Morgan -- who appears to have unfinished business with The Monster despite having suffered a clean loss at last the Against All Odds pay-per-view. This is probably a good thing for both men, as fans seem anxious to see these two settle their differences in a more definitive fashion since their last PPV encounter was seriously hampered by Morgan's real-life shoulder injury. Plus niether performer seems to fit into the promotion's remaining title pictures for the immediate future, and a good old fashioned blood feud between the company's two resident big men could really do wonders to set either (or BOTH!) of them up for a main event run on down the line.

To close out the show, Sting offered to lay down for Kurt Angle, but only after shaming the Olympic Gold Medalist into second-guessing his own request to win a championship in such a classless and tainted fashion. As a result, Angle challenged Sting to an empty arena match for next week's iMPACT!, where he promised to take the TNA Heavyweight Champion's title and end his wrestling career. Invariably, this lead to a pull-apart brawl between the two men (that's TNA's third one this year, by the way).

Now then --

While empty arena matches are typically campy and notoriously bad, I can't help but wonder if the decision to go with this gimmick for the blowoff match between Sting and Angle isn't largely being done so as to help hide the fact that Stinger's seriously been hurting for a good long while. Keep in mind that I haven't read the spoilers for tonight's show (which will be *last* night's show by the time this article is posted), but MeeThinks the empty arena approach should allow the company the chance to shoot the match using multiple angles and countless re-takes. In turn, this could allow the company to get the belt off of Stinger (or at least write him out of storylines for a while) without stinking up the joint in front of a live audience.

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Last week's Friday Night Smackdown! (air date: Feb. 13, 2009) was the go-home show before Sunday's No Way Out pay-per-view, and it played host to a number of matches and angles with implications that were to be felt on the blue brand's sole match at Sunday's PPV.

The show opened with an in-ring confrontation between The Big Show and his longtime frenemy, the WWE Champion Edge. After a war of words between the two men was interrupted by Smackdown General Manager Vickie Guerrero (who finally hinted at some sort of unspoken "relationship" with The Big Show during Edge's sabbatical last year), the main event for the evening was made pitting Show against Triple H and The Undertaker and Vladimir Kozlov. For what it's worth, Show's interaction with Edge and Vickie has been spot-on over the past several weeks, and it would be a real shame to see him get lost in the shuffle now that a World Heavyweight Championship feud between Edge and John Cena seems imminent for WrestleMania XXV. Show has really stepped up his game since returning to the WWE roster on a full-time basis just prior to last year's WrestleMania. Now one year later, and he's still very much a big-time player who seems to have earned the right to face a big-time opponent on the grandest stage of them all.

In-ring action for the night began in the next match, as MVP picked up a disqualification victory over Chavo Guerrero once the United States Champion Shelton Benjamin interfered on Guerrero's behalf. MVP and The Gold Standard have been butting heads for three weeks now, and it appears as if a title match between them for Shelton's United States Championship could be happening any day now. That said, I can't help but wonder if one (if not both) of these guys will probably end up thrown into the Money in the Bank ladder match at WrestleMania XXV, all but assuring us that their one-on-one beef will have to take a temporary back seat as we close out the Road to WrestleMania.

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Did You Know: WWE's "secondary titles" haven't been defended at WrestleMania events in years. The last WrestleMania match for the the United States Championship was at WrestleMania XXIII, while the last time the Intercontinental Championship was defended at Wrestlemania was at WrestleMania X8

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Backstage, fans learned that John Morrison and The Miz had sent Valentine's Day flowers to The Bella Twins, which earned them the ire of Carlito and Primo Colon. After a quick bout of verbal sparring, it was decided that the winners of their upcoming match would reserve the right to take the Bella twins on a date that evening. In the match that followed, The World Tag Team Champions stole a victory from the WWE Tag Team Champions to earn their date with the Colon boys' girlfriends.

Former WWE Champion Jeff Hardy returned to Smackdown! in the segment that followed, marking the first time he'd been seen on WWE television since last month's Royal Rumble PPV. Hardy told audiences that he was hoping to move beyond the family feud with his brother, Matt, and that he was looking instead to focus on regaining the WWE Championship at Sunday's No Way Out pay-per-view. While this one wasn't particularly lengthy or memorable, it definitely served its purpose in underscoring the Hardy brothers feud without distracting from Sunday's WWE Championship Match. Hopefully, the Hardys storyline will kick into high gear on this week's Smackdown! now that Jeff's title hopes have yet again been dashed.

Live action continued as R-Truth picked up a victory over Ezekiel Jackson. The match marked the first time that Jackson had been defeated in singles competition on WWE programming.

After a short interview, Maria Kanellis hit the ring for a return grudge match against Michelle McCool. Shockingly, the match *didn't suck* -- and Maria managed to score a roll-up victory over the former Diva's Champion thanks to the outside distraction of Eve Torres.

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Did You Know: This match was actually Maria's first televised on WWE programming bout since December 5, 2008. That match ended with Maria picking up a non-title victory over none other than then-Divas-Champion, Michelle McCool.

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To close out the show, Triple H, The Undertaker, The Big Show, and Vladimir Kozlov brawled to a no-contest when Edge interfered to pick up the momentum heading into Sunday's Elimination Chamber match between these five men (and Jeff Hardy, who was either smart enough and/or too beat up enough not to take part in the show-ending schmozz between the blue brand's Elimination Chamber entrants).

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WWE No Way Out (air date: Feb. 15, 2009) aired this past Sunday, and was highlighted by not just one but TWO separate Elimination Chamber matches.

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Did You Know: There have been a total of nine separate Elimination Chamber matches in WWE history, and six of them featured matches where one of the participants was defending a championship belt (last year's Chamber matches were for Number One Contender's slots at WrestleMania, and the "Extreme Elimination Chamber" in Dec. 2006 was for the then-vacant ECW Championship)

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The show opened with the Elimination Chamber match to determine the WWE Champion, and featured Edge, The Undertaker, Jeff Hardy, Triple H, The Big Show, and Vladimir Kozlov. After a hard-fought contest, Triple H emerged victorious from the structure, becoming the NEW WWE CHAMPION and claiming his 13th heavyweight title along the way. This marked and the fifth time that The Game has competed in an Elimination Chamber match, and the fourth separate Elimination Chamber match that Triple H has won.

In a no-holds-barred match that followed, Randy Orton defeated Shane McMahon with his patented RKO finishing maneuver after an in-ring assist from his Legacy stablemates Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase. Shane-O did manage to gain a small measure of revenge on The Legend Killer, however, first by busting Orton open after a hard shot from a television monitor, and then by taking out Rhodes with a sweet Van Terminator "Coast to Coast" corner dropkick.

The ECW Championship was up for grabs in the next bout, which saw Jack Swagger successfully defend the gold against number one contender Finlay, marking the latest in a long line of pay-per-view failures for the fighting Irishman (since returning to action in 2006, Finlay has only managed to pick up something like three wins in singles competition on PPV events).

In what was arguably the single weakest PPV match since his return to full-time competition in 2002, Shawn Michaels defeated John Bradshaw Layfield to gain his freedom from JBL's employment, retaining his image and likeness in perpetuity along the way (ah who are we kidding? Vince McMahon totally owns the Shawn Michaels name when everything's said and done).

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Did You Know: Shawn Michaels has held twelve separate championship reigns during his WWE career. Nine of those title reigns have ended with Shawn forfeiting his belt, being stripped of it, intentionally laying down for an opponent, or willfully surrendering it by abandoning a teammate during a title defense.

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To close out the show, RAW's Elimination Chamber match for the World Title took center stage, featuring John Cena, Mike Knox, Kane, Rey Mysterio, Chris Jericho, and Kofi Kingston -- who was ambushed just prior to the match and replaced by his assailant, Edge. Though The Rated R Superstar had lost his WWE Championship earlier in the night, he managed to walk away holding gold as the NEW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION to close out the show regardless.

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Did You Know: Edge has held eight heavyweight championship reigns in his WWE tenure. To date, every single one of these victories have been tainted in one fashion or another. Proving his title as WWE's "master manipulator," Edge has won gold thanks to outside interference, by challenging an opponent after a the champ had already competed in a previous match, and now by jumping an opponent *before* he could even enter into a scheduled contest.

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As the show faded to black, The Rated R Superstar celebrated his newly won World Heavyweigh Championship, while fans and announcers couldn't help but speculate whether or not Edge's "tainted" title victory would indeed be allowed to stand. (Memo to TNA's booking team: THIS is how you use a pay-per-view to sell free episodic television).

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RAW (air date: Feb. 16, 2009) was filled with the fallout from the No Way Out pay-per-view, and wasted no time in setting the stage for a number of high profile feuds that seem likely to culminate at WrestleMania XXV.

The show opened with an in-ring promo from Edge, whose World Championship victory at the No Way Out pay per view was upheld thanks to some backstage wranglings from his onscreen wife, Smackdown General Manager Vickie Guerrero. Before The Rated R Superstar could gloat too much longer, however, he was soon interrupted by John Cena, who issued a rematch challenge to his old nemesis. When Edge denied Cena's request for an in-ring rubber match to settle their differences, Cena then proceeded to bust out a Liam Neeson-inspired throwdown warning The Rated R Superstar that his days as World Champion were numbered. Here, take a look:

Liam Neeson: "If you let my daughter go now, I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't -- I will look for you, I WILL find you, and I will kill you."

John Cena: "You try to hide, I'll find you. You try to run, I'll catch you. We're gonna' fight... and I'm gonna hurt you."

Backstage, Shane McMahon issued a challenge to Randy Orton to meet him in the ring for an unsanctioned street fight to settle the issue between them once and for all. Though Stephanie McMahon protested Shane's decision to go through with the bout, this "unsanctioned" non-match was then immediately given main event billing, complete with entrance music and pyro (yup, that looks mighty "unsanctioned" by my standards).

In-ring action kicked off with a six man tag match, which saw the team of William Regal, Cody Rhodes, and Ted DiBiase pick up the win against CM Punk, Shad Gaspard and JTG. The match ended when DiBiase hit his newly dubbed "Dream Street" Million Dollar Dream slam on the smaller half of Cryme Tyme.

After commercial, Chris Jericho continued his one-man-crusade against Mickey Rourke and "The Wrestler," and confronted Rowdy Roddy Piper who took issue with Jericho's remarks and stood up for the older generation of performers. After a kickass exchange between two of the very best promo men *ever* in the history of the professional wrestling business (no joke, these two could very well be the respective BEST in each of their generations), Jericho turned on Piper and left the WWE Hall of Famer lying in the center of the ring to close out the segment. This marks the second week in a row where Jericho has confronted a legend of yesteryear on the heels of the critical acclaim of Mickey Rourke and "The Wrestler," and the 2008 Superstar of the Year appears to be headed to some sort of WrestleMania confrontation with a legendary foe. Given the fact that the Oscars will be held this coming Sunday night, this could prove to be a crucial turning point in determining Jericho's WrestleMania destiny. Win or lose, it will be most interesting to see if Mickey Rourke does indeed decide to set foot in a WWE ring once his Academy Award fate is decided on Sunday.

Back to live action, and Kane made short work of Jamie Noble, who inexplicably appears to have been newly (re)added to the same RAW roster from which he had only just recently jumped as of two weeks ago.

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Did You Know: In spite of his apparent defection to the ECW ranks, Jamie Noble's bio still remains on the RAW superstars page of the WWE.com website. But then again, so does the bio of Sim Snuka and Manu -- both of whom have not been seen or heard from on WWE programming in months.

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Following the commercial break, JBL reacted to his loss to Shawn Michaels at the No Way Out ppv. In an in-ring promo, Bradshaw admitted that he had been bested cleanly by The Showstopper (dunno' why, exactly, a career cheater like Bradshaw wouldn't simply protest the match's outcome on account of the thoroughly illegal slap he received at ringside from HBK's wife, mind you...) -- but then announced his intentions to set his sights much higher, so as to claim wrestling immortality by challenging (and beating) The Undertaker on the grandest stage of them all. To the surprise of absolutely no one, Shawn Michaels then hit the ring and issued his own challenge to The Phenom, arguing that it should be Mr. WrestleMania himself to stand toe-to-toe with the legend that has never yet been beaten in a WrestleMania match. Bradshaw and Michaels then agreed that they would face one another on next week's RAW, with the winner earning the right to challenge The Dead Man at WrestleMania XXV.

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Did You Know: Statistically, The Undertaker owns the single greatest WrestleMania win/loss record at 100% victories, having earned himself an impressive 16 wins and zero losses. JBL's WrestleMania win/loss record is a measly 33% (3 wins to 6 losses). HBK's record isn't all that much more impressive, as "Mr. WrestleMania" has gone 6-9 (for a 40% success rating) in WrestleManias past.

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Following the commercial break, RAW's Elimination Chamber MVP Rey Mysterio (who put on an outstanding performance at the No Way Out ppv, by the way) won a hard-fought battle against the ever-improving Mike Knox. Knox might still have a long ways to go, but you've gotta' give the man credit, as he's done a fine job of establishing himself as an old-school midcard monster, the likes of which WWE hasn't seen in years.

The WWE Women's Championship was on the line in the next match, where Melina managed to successfully defend her title against Beth Phoenix despite outside distraction and attempts at interference from Santino Marella and Rosa Mendes, who found themselves otherwise occupied with a ringside fracas against Candice Michelle and Mickie James.

Elsewhere on RAW, Terry Funk and Dory Funk, Jr. were announced as the next inductees to the WWE Hall of Fame. They are expected to join Steve Austin, Ricky Steamboat and The Von Eric Family as members of this year's Hall of Fame class. All great choices, for sure (though the question of why Randy Savage hasn't been added to the slate of inductees with a WWE-approved Macho Man DVD currently in the works is completely beyond Mee, however).

In the "unsanctioned" street fight to close out the show (to which Randy Orton arrived accompanied by his WWE-sanctioned entrance music while wearing his WWE-sanctioned wrestling attire), The Legend Killer ended his feud with Shane McMahon by delivering a punt to the skull to leave the Boy Wonder lying unconscious in the center of the ring. After the match, Stephanie McMahon pleaded with Orton to call off his attack, which earned The Billion Dollar Princess an RKO for her troubles. This drew an outraged Triple H to rush down to ringside in order to check on the welfare of his "on and off," on-and-offscreen love interest to close out the show in a thrilling conclusion -- likely setting the stage for a WrestleMania showdown between The Legend Killer and The Game over the WWE Championship.

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ECW on SciFi (air date: Feb. 17, 2009) continued to serve as the slow-build home for a number of WWE's lower profile feuds this week, as three major angles continued to unfold while a hot prospect of a newcomer continued to make his presence felt.

The show opened with a quick and basic encounter between Paul Birchall and The Boogeyman, which actually saw the wormeater suffer a clean pinfall loss courtesy of a schoolboy roll-up from The Ripper. This was Boogeyman's first clean loss on WWE programming since Sept. 18, 2007, when he was defeated by Big Daddy V.

In the next match, John Morrison defeated Tommy Dreamer in under five minutes' time to continue the losing streak of the ECW Original in search of one more run at the top. While the "real life Rocky Balboa" storyline has always been something of a defining trait of the Tommy Dreamer character (Dreamer himself has admitted that it was initially his goal in the original ECW never to hold the company's highest prize), The Innovator of Violence has yet to win a match since announcing his intent to "win or retire" deadline on Jan. 13. Later in the show, Dreamer was consoled by Ricky Ortiz, who encouraged the former ECW Champion to "rally up" and turn his losing streak around. I can't help but wonder if somebody in the WWE front office must be reading the internet reports that Ortiz has the same "wacky working man charisma" as a certain former self-high-fiving WCW Champion. Somewhere in a corner, motivational speaker Diamond Dallas Page is shedding a tear.

ECW newcomer Tyson Kidd defeated local talent Caden Matthews in a brief and one-sided encounter that followed. With two wins under his belt, Kidd remains unbeaten since debuting on the ECW roster last week -- though he has yet to face a contracted ECW talent.

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Did You Know: Tyson Kidd may have only just recently made his "official" debut with World Wrestling Entertainment, but this is hardly his first go-round with the organization. Performing under his real name of TJ Wilson, the man now called Tyson Kidd actually appeared in the opening match of a WWF House Show in Calgary way back in 1996 -- at the ripe old age of just sixteen.

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The main event of the evening saw the team of Mark Henry and Jack Swagger (complete with first and last names!) defeated by the team of Finlay and Christian (relegated to just one name apiece). The finish came when Finlay smacked Henry over the head with his shillelagh, causing a momentary distraction to Swagger which allowed Christian hit The Unprettier The Killswitch for the win. Captain Charisma and The All-American American are set to do battle for the ECW Championship on next week's broadcast.


And With That, I'm Outta' Here

That'll do it for Mee again this week. No pay-per-views this weekend, but wrestling fans the world over will probably have something of a vested interest in the outcome of Sunday night's Oscars nonetheless. Here's hoping Mickey Rourke finally gets his due, Heath Ledger receives a standing ovation, and Wall-E manages to score itself some long overdue award show recognition, especially when stacked against the tough competition of Kung Fu Panda. 'Till next time, enjoy the show, and always stay positive!

- Meehan

The National Domestic Violence Hotline : [phone]-SAFE.