If I Could Be Serious For A Moment 02.24.09: Unreleased Material

Posted by Chris Lansdell on 02.24.2009

After all the recent releases from WWE and TNA, someone made an off-the-cuff remark that there was probably enough talent out there and unsigned to make your own promotion. OK then, I will.

Greetings, humanity! Welcome back to If I Could Be Serious For A Moment, your weekly helping of intelligent wrestling discourse with a nice bowl of biting wit for dessert. My name is Chris Lansdell, and this week's topic is a little on the lighter side. Sometimes you need to step back from heavy issues and look at something a little less...serious. But of course, we must start with the

BANNER!

Start Me Up

Last week, I told you I was not a fantasy booker, and I'm not. I also told you that WWE and TNA had made some questionable releases over the past few weeks. I figured if I was going to complain about the decisions, then I should do something to show how this talent could be better used. A very wise person once told me that you can't complain about something if you don't know how it could have been done better.

So here's what we're doing this week. We're taking some of the recently-released talent, sprinkling in some Indy workers, and making ourselves a nice little promotion. I'll explain some of my decisions, show you some feuds, identify my champions and talk about things like target market. If there's an interest, I may also hand the roster off to an experienced fantasy booker and have tem do up a couple of cards. Of course, we can't do anything without a name, a market and a roster. Wow, this is just like EWR! I wish I still had that game, along with a nice big roster update file and a commentary update file. Yes, that was a hint.

What? Where?

Let's start with the least important: then name of the promotion. This is going to be a promotion based on athleticism, storylines based on competition and not having hot coffee spilled on you, and respect for the fans, the competitors and the industry. The name needs to reflect those principles but also be catchy. True Wrestling Omega (TWO) is my choice. It probably sucks, but I don't exactly have a degree in marketing…

The key to any successful business venture is to know your demographic and targeting them. A wrestling promotion with very little glitz and glamour is not going to work just anywhere, it has to be targeted. That said, the traditional wrestling hotbeds are already saturated with minor indy feds who draw a couple of hundred people tops. Regardless, if you're going to start a promotion you'll get no better opinion of it from the get-go than by running the "smart cities" – New York, Philly, Boston, Montreal, Toronto, Detroit and Chicago. As you grow you can head west to Minneapolis and Calgary, south to Atlanta, Memphis and parts of Florida. The important thing there is to take your time with expanding. This is something Ring of Honor has done very well, never over-extending themselves and making sure to consolidate a fan base in one city before running a new one.

Despite the tradition of new promotions starting in Philadelphia, I would start this one in Detroit. A lot of the talent I'm hoping to use is based in Canada, so being close to the border will help. It's also a huge wrestling city and in a fairly central location. After a few shows I would run Detroit/Toronto, then Boston/Montreal and expand from there. It's important early on not to saturate the fans, so no more than 2 shows a month to start with.

Advertising and money

Of course it won't matter where you have your shows, who's on them or how good the ideas are if nobody knows about it. Adequately publicising your events is essential to making the promotion work. Encourage your booked talent to promote the event on their websites (most will do this anyway). Take out ads on local alternative music radio stations. No point wasting money on pop stations, the people who generally listen to those won't come to a wrestling show. I'd also contact as many wrestling websites as possible and try and get some of the writers to publicise the show.

You need to have a good mix of local guys and nationally known names in order to attract decent crowds, but unfortunately the bigger the name, the bigger the paycheque. As with any other business, you have to be prepared to run at a loss to start with. Some of the names I will be using are not going to come cheap, but they WILL bring credibility and fans to the product. As a result the ticket prices will need to be a little higher than a typical Indy in the long run. Early on though it's important I don't price myself out of the market. I'm not naïve enough to think a TV deal would be available, but it's important to be prepared in case some local access station comes knocking. The events should all be filmed, with live commentary, and released on DVD through existing channels (Highspots, for example). Getting exposure to as wide an audience as possible will be key when I look to expand.

So how will it work?

Now we're getting to the fun parts. If I'm going to start a promotion, it needs to have a hook, something that makes it different from the other Indy feds. RoH has the Code of Honor, CHIKARA has its lucha style and tag team focus, CZM and IWA-MS are hardcore feds. Basing mine on competition and respect immediately puts me in the same category as RoH, the big fish in the Indy pond, so something about TWO needs to be sufficiently different to make fans want to see it. For each title I would have a ladder system, with the champion at the top. You can challenge people within 3 places of you on the ladder, but if someone closer to the person you are challenging wants to challenge the same person, you must let them fight first. Win, you move up. Lose, you move down. This makes even midcard matches important, as the fans can see exactly what effect they have on the rankings in a division. If the champion loses, he goes right back to the bottom of the ladder, giving me the chance to have established names facing newcomers and giving them the rub if need be. If the champion beats the challenger, they too drop to the bottom of the ladder. RoH tried this with their Top 5 and the #1 Contender trophy, but it didn't last as they found it restricted their booking and storylines. By making the storylines be about the competition and not vice versa, you avoid that restriction. The actual rankings would be brought to every event and changed after each match, keeping the fans up to date.

There are several stories you could run from this style of booking. A heel intentionally loses matches to avoid facing someone he once cheated out of a title win, always staying outside the 3-space limit. A faction holds the top 3 spots and cheats to maintain those spots without getting caught. The number 4 guy in the rankings keeps losing when he has a chance to move up and winning when people ahead of him win, frustrating him because he never gains any ground.

Minor rules would include the same ring out policy as is found in RoH: no count, but the referee can disqualify one or both men for spending too long outside. There would be disqualifications, but a title would change hands on a DQ so fans would expect fewer run-ins, and the ones that did happen would mean more. An obvious attempt to make someone lose their title with a run-in would NOT make the title change hands, but would drop the perpetrator down the ladder. This could also be used as punishment for disrespect, cheating and so on. Tag matches would be fought under standard rules; as exciting as scramble rules are, they can be confusing to new viewers.

There would be 2 singles titles, a tag title and eventually a women's title, unless I could come to an agreement with SHIMMER. You'd have the TWO Northeast champion, and the TWO Respect champion. Again, these names could be better. The third belt would be fought under the old RoH Pure championship rules because hey, they're not using it and I loved the idea. The only changes would be that you cannot intentionally leave the ring to go to the floor (the apron is OK) and the matches would be 2 out of 3 falls. The tag titles would also run on a ladder system. Holding one belt would prevent you from competing for another one.

And of course, who?

When I sat down to write this column, I thought this would be the easy part. Nope. There's a lot of talent out there, much of it young and released. For the purposes of the column I will stick to people released from WWE or TNA in the past 18 months and sprinkle some Indy names into the mix. I will not include people under contract to RoH (like Bryan Danielson…) because although they remain available to compete in Indy feds, the point of this column is to show the talent that is NOT being used. Besides, it would be too easy. With that in mind, here are my divisions:

TWO NorthEast: Champion – Val Venis/Sean Morley
Contenders: Elijah Burke, D'Lo Brown, Lance Hoyt, RVD, Kevin Fertig, Erick Stevens, BJ Whitmer, Colt Cabana, Brent Albright

Reasoning: Morley is a great evaluator of talent whose release still surprises me. Having him as champion puts a well-known name at the front of the company and also plays the role of allowing me to have new talent evaluated quickly. D'Lo is also pretty good at talent evaluation. Burke could have been huge in WWE. He had charisma, he had the look, he wasn't cookie cutter and he could talk up a storm. In the ring he was better than passable. He was let go basically because he hadn't been used, and because of Michael Hayes and his bullshit. RVD is RVD, and may well show up on one-shot deals here and there. Fertig and Hoyt are both talented big men who never really got used to the fullest potential (Hoyt especially, who can pull off a Van Terminator at his size…) and who got released too soon. Whitmer is an experienced hand who never seems to have bad matches but is a step or two short of being The Man, and Stevens is the young gun of the group, along with Burke. Both Stevens and Hoyt would need a manager, and we're going to make them part of a stable with a tag team (see below), managed by Larry Sweeney. Cabama simply had to be added the moment he was released; his comedic skill along with his strong in-ring abilities make him a perfect lower-card guy, but as he showed in his feud with Homicide he can turn serious if necessary and be kick-ass doing it. Albright had a cup of coffee in WWE as Gunner Scott and was doomed to failure with that name and no gimmick. His OVW shooter gimmick was perfect for his character and would have got him over. Conway

TWO Respect: Champion – Paul London
Contenders: Nunzio, Kenny Omega, Jimmy Rave, Petey Williams, Reid Flair, Windham Rotunda, Joe Hennig, Steamboat Jr,, Alex Kozlov, Teddy Hart.

Reasoning: London can have great matches with anyone. He heads the division because his name is the most known. Along with Jimmy Rave, Nunzio and their manager Prince Nana, they will resurrect The Embassy. Kenny Omega was cut from WWE Developmental and it's a crying shame. The man has all the tools and is just in need of some polish to make it to the next level. Petey Williams should never have been released from TNA, but he was and their loss is my gain. He forms North 49 with Tyson Dux, Eric Young and Teddy Hart, although The Second Coming (Flair, Rotunda, Hennig and Steamboat) are pushing hard to recruit Hart. By bringing in the next generation guys you attract some old-school fans who want to see if the kids are chips off the old block, and Kozlov really impressed me during the World X Cup. He and Kenny Omega could have some great matches. Teddy Hart will draw nuclear heat anywhere. I did not include Sonjay Dutt because he's trouble waiting to happen. There's a mountain of evidence to suggest that he is on something and the last thing you want as a wrestling promotion is that sort of attention.

TWO Tag Team: Champions – Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch
Contenders: Incoherence (Delirious and Hallowicked), North 49 (Tyson Dux and Eric Young), Sweet and Sour Inc (Ken Doane and Roderick Strong , managed by Larry Sweeney), any two of The Second Coming.

Reasoning: Cade and Murdoch were a great team in WWE, cut short for unknown reasons. They are still remembered by WWE fans and would make a solid head to the tag ranks. Incoherence can work comedy matches as well as spotfests and more technical affairs, and Delirious has the advantage of being a great trainer. Dux and Young are both solid tag team workers, with Young especially having name value. Doane is another guy with all the tools but an attitude that suggests he KNOWS he has all the tools. Hopefully pairing him with two guys who have toiled in the indy ranks despite buckets of talent will mellow him out somewhat. Strong reminds me a lot of Chris Benoit: stiff, great worker, but couldn't talk a salesman into an extended warranty. Giving him two good talkers to pal around with will improve his profile and might even teach him something.

Support staff: Ideally my TWO Director would be Bret Hart or Paul Heyman, but I could also go for Sunny in the role. Bryce Remsburg and Todd Sinclair would be my referees, and the announce team would be Tony Schiavone and Bobby Heenan. If Heenan couldn't do it, I'd look up Don Callis. I also would find a role for Joel Gertner as a manager with no clients, desperately trying to convince someone to defect, always bringing in one-shot deals to try and win them contracts (this could get both young local talent on the cards and provide a gateway for guest appearances) and generally playing the cash-starved sleazeball manager.

On The Bubble

I could also have included Rob Conway and Nick Dinsmore, but they were both released a while ago. Conway is incredibly talented and Dinsmore perhaps more so, but the former Eugene does have a few skeletons in his closet too. Snitsky and Big Daddy V...moving on.

The Next Step

So obviously this is just a framework, with a roster of mismatched guys and some ideas. No it's not real, probably never will be, but it just goes to show that there is talent out there, and enough of it to make a promotion. If someone was so inclined. Who knows, maybe someone who IS a fantasy booker will read this column and send me some ideas.

Moment Over.

Hulk Hogan claims he was up for the role of Randy the Ram, but turned it down. I think I speak for the rest of the world when I say "Thank God!" It will be a Dark summer Knight in the Arctic before Hogan can act that well.

Mickey Rourke is saying that "other people" advised him not to wrestle at Mania. Why do I get the feeling that by the time you read this, he will have shown up on Raw? No Doubt, WWE will Milk this for all it's worth.

Still on the same topic, I see the IWC is up in arms about Rourke not winning an Oscar. Really, did he have a chance? Maybe if Prop 8 hadn't worked, or worked. I forget if it was to prevent or to allow.

There was a rumour that Rihanna was being considered for the theme music to SummerSlam, but Chris Brown beat her out for it.

After what WWE did last summer, they decided Freddie Prinze wasn't all that, so he has left Smackdown Creative. There is no truth to the rumours that he was going to have Scotty Goldman wear a dog suit and unmask Rey Misterio.

Ring of Honor have made som major moves this week: Ric Flair in (unlikely he'll make them back the money he will cost), Lenny Leonard out (to be replaced by the next Mike Adamle) and Dragon Gate out (only so many times you can see a lightning-fast 6-man anyway). With a TV deal, a new booker, a new direction and more new talent, this is certainly a Revolutionary Road they're on.

That's it from me, folks. If you haven't already, I highly recommend going to see Taken. My only gripe is that Liam Neeson's particular set of skills does not include accents. I'm off to enjoy a day off. Stay Cool, Rock Hard.

Lansdellicious – Out.