Brooklyn Brawlin' 3.19.09: Crowning Mr. Wrestlemania

Posted by Dan Torkel on 03.19.2009

College Basketball bracketology, Wrestlemania on the way, spring is here...I think I have MARCH MADNESS! Hope its not like Macho Madness...

Welcome to another enthralling edition of Brooklyn Brawlin'. Last week we counted down some of the greatest non-title matches of all time. The general consensus amongst commenters was the one I missed was Rock vs. Hogan from Wrestlemania X-8. I respectfully disagree with this. This was one of the best occurrences in pro-wrestling where crowd helped to elevate a match into the stratosphere of people's memories. While the heat was off the charts, and the booking was genius, the match itself was just okay. All things considered I would give it about ***1/2, full 5 on heat and emotion, but only 2 for the wrestling.

Let's go to the videotape shall we. Last night's Raw was a second consecutive bomb on the way to Wrestlemania. Two weeks ago I was waxing poetic on the builds towards the main events, but now I am shockingly appalled at what is happening. Triple H and Orton's super build has broken down to another Triple H overcomes the world angle… AND HE IS THE CHAMPION!!! I am sick of everything Vicky Guerrero, and she is ruining a potentially good match between Cena, Show, and Edge. And really… is this the payoff for Jericho's feud with the Legends? I refuse to believe that they are giving Jimmy Snuka; who could not bend enough to do his pose two weeks ago, a Wrestlemania payday. After all the weeks and great promos we get this, a 3 – 1 handicap match with 2 guys who can barely move. No, I am refusing to believe this until the moment it happens. There is NO possible outcome to redeem the time wasted if this is the angle and match that occurs. I am holding out hope for Stone Cold to come down and challenge Jericho, because in Houston it would be a great moment, and Jericho's credibility is not destroyed should he lose.

Speaking of words like "credibility destroyed", "appalled", and "sick"… did anyone see Destination X? I thankfully did not, but let me just say this, Samoa Joe (who at this point last year was a hair from the World Title and biggest push ever), stabbed Scott Steiner. Yeah, that's where we are with TNA. TNA; the company that has run a 5 month angle revolving around the old guard of wrestlers (MEM) taking the young guns (Frontline), will conclude the long feud with the two top MEM members facing the "young stars" JEFF JARRETT AND MICK FOLEY and Lockdown. TNA, I tried, I really did. I had faith in you to deliver with this angle. I had faith it would not become another NWO. But in the end, your company IS 1997-1998 WCW. Your first few ppv matches dedicated to X-Division (cruiserweights) and Tag Teams are good, but all the main event angles suck, are repetitive and lack any forward thought and direction. I am predicting here, that like 1998 WCW, TNA, you are out of business within 3 years. Then I can watch Samoa Joe and AJ Styles jobbing to Mark Henry in ECW main events on Tuesday nights.

Let's get to the crux of this week's column. I am a monster College Basketball fan and am fully entranced by the March Madness tournament starting any second now. So I figured I would use the tournament style to figure out the epic question, who is Mr. Wrestlemania?

MR. WRESTLEMANIA –

This will be a 16-man single elimination tournament featuring the biggest and best stars of the 24 previous Wrestlemanias. Some of the wrestlers in this tournament have losing Mania records, but more thought is put into their entire body of work. This includes spot on the card, quality of match, title opportunities and so on. For instance Andre the Giant's loss to Hulk Hogan at Wrestlemania III is worth more to me than Randy Orton winning the World Title triple threat last year.

Let's reveal our overall # 1 seed…

# 1 seed – Undertaker – Do I need to explain here? While all of his victories are not classics (Bundy, Snuka, Giant Gonzalez), Taker is THE man at the big dance going a perfect 16 – 0 and winning 3 World Titles (WM 13 over Sid, WM 23 over Batista, and WM 24 over Edge)

# 2 seed – Hulk Hogan –
Without Hogan there would be no Wrestlemania. He main evented the first 9 events and attained an 8 – 3 – 1 record. In his 9 main events, he defended the WWE Title twice, and won the Title three times. His match with Andre the Giant at WM III is still, arguably the biggest match in wrestling history.

# 3 seed – Shawn Michaels –
The man's nickname is Mr. Wrestlemania after all, but his overall record is only 6 – 9. But dig deeper into that record and we see his loses outweigh others wins. He lost near perfect classics against Razor Ramon at WM X, Benoit at WM XX, Kurt Angle at WM XXI, and to Cena at WM XXIII. Some of his victories: Iron man for the WWE Title against Bret, and last year's farewell to Flair. Quality of match over quantity of wins for maybe the greatest performer at the big show.

# 4 seed - Stone Cold Steve Austin –
Austin was the man who brought the WWE back from the dead against WCW in the Monday Night Wars. His rise to power from 96 – 98 sparked the WWE. At the biggest show of the all, Austin has been fantastic, garnering a 5 – 2 record including 3 WWE Title wins, two over the Rock, and his first over Shawn Michaels. Over the previous few years he has appeared as a guest referee or a guest on Piper's Pit, and will grace us again as he is going into the HOF this year.

# 5 seed – "Macho Man" Randy Savage –
Savage was a Mania monster during the early years of the event, earning Match of the Night (and possibly of the year) at WM's III, V, VII, and VIII; not to mention his epic 4 match night at Wrestlemania IV where he won his first WWE Title. His overall record was 7 – 4, but despite his "madness" no one will forget his 2 WWE Title wins, or his possibly more significant loses to Steamboat and Warrior.

# 6 seed – Bret "Hitman" Hart –
Bret's 7 – 6 record really shows his progression in the company. He was in Battle Royals (being eliminated last in both), 6-man tags, Tag Title matches, IC Title matches, WWE Title matches, two "I Quit" matches and an Iron man Match. While his Iron man match with HBK is usually looked at as his greatest Mania match, his WM 13 match with Stone Cold was as significant a match as any in wrestling, and in my opinion his best moment.

# 7 seed – Triple H –
Hunter; like Shawn Michaels, surprisingly boasts a losing (5 – 7) record. But his ability to stay at the top of card year in year out makes him an easy choice at #7. Like Bret we see his progression from midcard JTTS to his rise to European Champion, and eventual World Champ. He was the first heel to leave Wrestlemania as Champion at WM 2000, and will be a part of 8 World Title matches after this year's event.

# 8 seed – The Rock –
Only seeded after Triple H due his move to acting, the People's Champ was 4 – 4 in Wrestlemanias, but main evented 3 consecutive from 15 – 17 and gained revenge against his greatest rival by finally defeating Stone Cold at WM 19 in Seattle. He also had one of the most memorable matches in recent memory when he defeated Hulk Hogan at WM 18.

# 9 – Andre the Giant –
Andre sadly passed away in early 1993, and made a final Mania appearance seconding Big Bossman at WM VII. While his 2 – 3 – 1 record doesn't seem Giant sized, Andre participated in the first Battle of Giants with Big John Studd, reigned as King of the Battle Royals at WM 2, and participated in the absolute biggest match in history in the Pontiac Silverdome.

# 10 seed – "Rowdy" Roddy Piper –
Dare I say; without a heel like Piper, Hulk Hogan could not have made the inaugural Wrestlemania. Piper's Pit helped sell WM with appearances by Mr. T, and Piper's lackeys Orton and Orndorff. Piper also headlined one of the 3 venues of WM 2 with his Boxing Match against T, and had a proud "farewell" after defeating Adrian Adonis at WM III. He would go on to become a Mania mainstay with Piper's Pit segments at WM's V and XXI, and an infamous moment of painting himself half black against Bad News Brown.

# 11 seed – Kurt Angle –
The Olympic Gold Medallist was only 3 – 4 in seven appearances but of those seven, wrestled for or defended a title four times. He actually defended two separates titles in the same match at WM 2000, and lost both without being pinned. His two biggest and best moments were his classic defeat to WWE Champion Eddie Guerrero at WM 20 and his 5 star epic against Shawn Michaels at WM XXI, in which he won via tap out. He also deserves special props for main eventing WM 19 against Brock Lesnar with a severely broken neck and STILL getting a 4+ star match.

#12 seed – John Cena –
It's hard to come up with a case against John Cena, love him or hate him. He has only appeared in 5 Wrestlemanias, but has been in a title match every time, and has 4 main events to his credit. He is also the only person to tap out BOTH Triple H and Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemania and he did in back-to-back events (22 and 23). This year will be his fifth consecutive WM World Title match and he can become the first person since Hogan to win and defend a World Title twice.

# 13 seed – Edge –
What is John Cena at 12 without Edge at 13? Edge can claim the same style of progress as Bret and Triple H. Edge is 5 – 2, (3 – 1) in 4 WM ladder matches, and also main evented last year as a defending World Champion. Sure he once fought Booker T over a shampoo commercial, but we can forgive that after his spear through a flaming table against Mick Foley. My all time favorite Wrestlemania spot… Edge's 20+ foot spear on a dangling Jeff Hardy at WM X-7.

# 14 seed – Kane –
Before you judge me for throwing Kane in the tournament, the WWE rewards longevity, and so do I. Add to this, Kane has performed well at the big dance, 5 – 5 overall. Who would have thought that when he debuted back in October of 1997, we would be talking about Kane 12 years later? Sure he has loses to Taker twice, and to Great Khali, but he also defended Tag Team Titles at WM 22, won the Hardcore Title at WM X-7, and set a WM record with his 10 second ECW Title win over Chavo last year. Oh yeah, he also beat Triple H at Wrestlemania XV, albeit by DQ.

# 15 – Mick Foley –
The many faces of Foley have wrestled at six Wrestlemanias, and appeared at others as guest referees. Mankind and Vader wrestled Tag Champs Bulldog and Owen to a double DQ or COTR at WM 13, Cactus Jack and Terry Funk won the Tag belts at WM 14, Mankind was back beating Big Show by DQ at WM 15, and plain old Mick Foley lost in the WM 2000 main event. Perhaps Mick's biggest and best moment was at WM 22, when he and Edge engaged in a sick, brutal hardcore match at WM 22, a match he lost despite finally attaining that elusive WM moment.

And finally, the # 16 seed – Ultimate Warrior –
He only had 4 Wrestlemania matches but managed to defeat both Mega Powers back to back. His victory over Hulk Hogan in Wrestlemania VI's Ultimate Challenge cemented his status in history and then he topped that a year later with his best match ever, a Career saving victory over Randy Savage.

That sets up our Mr. Wrestlemania Tournament Brackets:

1) Undertaker
16) Ultimate Warrior

8) Rock
9) Andre the Giant

12) John Cena
5) Macho Man Randy Savage

13) Edge
4) Stone Cold Steve Austin

11) Kurt Angle
6) Bret Hart

14) Kane
3) Shawn Michaels

10) Roddy Piper
7) Triple H

15) Mick Foley
2) Hulk Hogan

First Round Matches –

# 1 Undertaker defeats # 16 Ultimate Warrior – This is as much a 5-star match as you would expect… ok maybe not. Warrior tries his crazy no selling offense and hits a series of shoulder blocks, but Taker sees one coming and drives him face first into the mat. That sets up a Chokeslam and the Tombstone finishes Warrior clean to finally pay off that 1991 storyline.

# 8 Rock defeats # 9 Andre the Giant – Rock wins a David vs. Goliath affair, managing to avoid a falling Andre head butt and catching a staggered Giant with his short spine buster and People's Elbow for the pin.

# 12 John Cena defeats # 5 Randy Savage – This is the biggest upset of the first round, as the current main eventer takes out one of the Mega Powers. Macho, always great at selling injures his leg midway through in a crazy over the top bump. Cena is bigger and stronger, but Savage counters into several pin attempts. He finally tries the Big Elbow but takes too long setting up and Cena moves and capitalizes on a prone Macho Man with the STFU for the surprising tap out.

# 4 Stone Cold Steve Austin defeats # 13 Edge – Edge tries every opportunistic trick in the book, and tries cheating to win but Austin prevails catching a Spear-charging Edge with KICK WHAM STUNNER to advance.

# 11 Kurt Angle defeats # 6 Bret Hart – In my All Time KOTR Tournament, this was the final, now it's a first round epic. Going nearly 25 minutes of back and forth mat wrestling and counters, both men manage to escape submissions by using the ropes. The end comes when Bret tries to victory roll Angle out of the corner but Angle does an Owen counter only segueing into the Ankle Lock. He drags Bret into the center and drops into the grapevine for the submission.

#3 Shawn Michaels defeats # 14 Kane – Kane dominates early but Shawn counters the chokeslam, drops behind and nails Sweet Chin Music to move on. This is as prototypical a Shawn/Kane match would be.

# 7 Triple H defeats # 10 Roddy Piper – Piper uses all his tricky comedy techniques but this is the Game we are talking about and he advances after hitting a low blow to counter the Sleeper and then the Pedigree.

# 2 Hulk Hogan defeats # 15 Mick Foley with the Hulk Up. After Foley bends in and out of personas and the rules, he wears Hogan down with the Mandible Claw before trying a pin off a double arm DDT. Kick out, Hulk Up, Big Boot, Leg Drop and we are off to the second round.

SECOND ROUND –

# 1 Undertaker over # 8 Rock – Taker gets a huge test by facing the People's Champ in round 2. Both men exchange big time moves and finishers with Rock kicking out of both a chokeslam and Last Ride and Taker managing to survive the Rockbottom and People's Elbow. The end comes when Rock tries one more Rockbottom but Taker counters to a Flatliner and cinches a prone Rock into the Hell's Gate and the Great One is forced to tap out!

# 4 Stone Cold Steve Austin over # 12 John Cena – Biggest star of the 90's vs. biggest star of today has the crowd going crazy. Austin makes the ropes on an STFU attempt as they both play avoid the finisher. In Austin fashion, the match becomes a wild brawl before settling back in the ring. Cena actually gets the upper hand and hits the FU but can't make the cover in time and Austin kicks out. The ending is a series of counters where Austin blocks the FU, tries the Stunner only for Cena to catch the leg and try the STFU but Austin kicks him off and as Cena charges in its KICK WHAM STUNNER and done.

# 3 Shawn Michaels over # 11 Kurt Angle – Angle would have to have the best stamina in the world to beat Bret and Shawn back to back. This is of course a rematch of their near perfect 5-star match at WM 21. Angle works the leg and ankle, Shawn keeps firing back and never saying quit. After several finisher counters Shawn hits the flying forearm and goes up only for Angle to get a pop-up Superplex. Straps come down and its Ankle Lock time again. Shawn rolls in and kicks Angle off and tries to fire off a Superkick, but Angle catches the leg and turns him over again… but Shawn rolls through into a double leg roll up and scores the pin.

# 7 Triple H over # 2 Hulk Hogan – The surprise of round 2 comes here. In their only one on one meeting, it took Chris Jericho, Undertaker, and a steel chair to help Hogan beat Hunter at Backlash 2002. Without that stuff, Triple H is younger, and better. This plays a lot like Rock/Hogan from Wrestlemania X-8 as Hogan kicks out of one Pedigree and Hulks Up, but Triple H avoids the leg drop and hits a second Pedigree for the pin.

SEMIFINALS –
# 1 Undertaker vs. # 4 Stone Cold Steve Austin
# 3 Shawn Michaels vs. # 7 Triple H

# 4 Stone Cold Steve Austin defeats # 1 Undertaker – It finally happens… Taker losing in a match dealing with Wrestlemania. Austin has ALWAYS had Taker's number having probably the best win/loss record against of anyone in recent memory. This is their typical brawl/wrestling match much like their 98 Summerslam classic. Taker breaks out some major high spots including an over the top tope. Austin appears down and out after a chokeslam, but drops behind on a Tombstone attempt and hits a Stunner. Both men are down and Taker boots the ref by mistake. Austin sends Taker to the buckle and mounts him with punches. As Taker tries to pull him out for the Last Ride, Austin holds on and rips off the top turnbuckle pad. Austin counters and drops behind again this time sending Taker head first into the exposed bolt, and the KICK WHAM STUNNER sends Austin to the finals.

# 3 Shawn Michaels defeats # 7 Triple H – DX explodes. These two have had some classic encounters in the past and this time should be no different. Triple H dominates with power offense with Michaels throwing everything he has at his stronger adversary. Triple H has the Pedigree countered to a slingshot and Shawn tries Sweet Chin Music only for Triple H to duck and catch Shawn with the spine buster. Pedigree is countered again to a Jackknife rollup but Triple H rolls with it and turns it into the Pedigree. Shawn JUST gets his foot on the ropes. Triple H tries one more Pedigree but gets backdropped over the top to the apron. He tries to climb to the top to surprise Shawn but leaps right into SWEET CHIN MUSIC and Shawn falls backwards into the pin

TOURNAMENT FINALS - WHO IS MR. WRESTLEMANIA???

# 3 Shawn Michaels vs. # 4 Stone Cold Steve Austin –
Imagine Wrestlemania 14's Main Event is Shawn was physically able to go full blast. Shawn and Austin rekindle their old rivalry with a vicious and brutal contest. The ref allows lots of leeway and both men take it, as weapons and outside brawling come into play. The battle on to the announce table where Shawn lays out Austin and goes back up to the top rope, but MISSES the elbow and crashes through the table. Austin rolls him back in to pick the bones. Austin is ruthless and looks for the finish but Shawn shoves off the Stunner and hits Sweet Chin Music. Shawn cannot make the cover and crawls over to tune up the band. Austin ducks and hits the Stunner! Both men are down and slow to get up. Austin gets whipped and Shawn hits the flying forearm. Kip Up! Slam, slam, and top rope elbow follow and its band tuning time. In true WM 14 style Austin catches the boot and swings Michaels around and KICK WHAM… NO! Michaels catches the kick and BOOM Sweet Chin Music! 1, 2, and 3; Shawn Michaels lives up to his nickname and becomes the OFFICIAL Mr. Wrestlemania!

Winner – Mr. Wrestlemania Shawn Michaels

Hope you enjoyed this look into the greatest wrestlers of the greatest wrestling event. With a few more week to go we will continue examining the card and history of Wrestlemania! Till then, have fun storming the castle.