The Ring of Honor ROHPort 5.23.09

Posted by J.D. Dunn on 05.24.2009

The former members of the Age of the Fall look for revenge on Jimmy and Brodie Lee.

Ring of Honor
by J.D. Dunn
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May 23, 2009

From Philadelphia, Pa.

Your hosts are Mike Hogewood and Dave Prazak.

We open with a mysterious table in the middle of the ring. What does it want? Why did it come here? Is it friendly? We don't know. The American Wolves come down to make fun of Steen & Generico and hype the tag match next week. That brings out the champs to chase them off. Poor Shane Hagadorn gets fed to Steen, who puts him through a table.

ROH Champ Jerry Lynn talks strategy for his upcoming match against Tyler Black, Bryan Danielson & Austin Aries. More of this please.

Triple Threat: Jay Briscoe (w/Mark Briscoe) vs. Kenny King vs. Kenny Omega.
Jay is in a grumpy mood tonight as he slaps both guys in the face for their insolence. King's sell of the slap is glorious. He finally pisses Briscoe and Omega off so much that they team up against him. Omega dives out on top of King but stops to celebrate, so Jay kicks him in the head. King puts on the breaks and hits a twisting cannonball off the apron. That messes up Jay's knee for a bit, turning it into a one-on-one. King displays some good personality here. It's like Shelton Benjamin if Benjamin actually looked comfortable in his own skin. Omega gets a silly double huracanrana and the stop-sign enzuigiri on King. Omega slips away from Jay and hits a lungblower on King. Jay plants him with a fireman's carry slam and goes up, but King jumps up with the super vertical enzuigiri. That sends Jay to the floor, allowing King to set up for the Coronation. Instead, though, Omega squirms around into a rollup for the fluke win at 11-ish (no watch for me tonight). SLAP THE PORPOISE. IT'S OVER! Loved the repeated build to the crescendo spot (don't bother correcting me; outside of music, it can mean both the build and the peak). **3/4

The Dark City Fight Club vs. The Irish Airborne.
You know how I know the Airborne are going to get killed? A total combined weight of 360. POUNCE~! That is all you need to know. The Dark City Street Cutter finishes at 2-ish. I know the idea is to build them up as monster heels for a big showdown with a real team, but I could watch them kill bitches all day. CANCEL A GIBBON'S ARENA RESERVATION WITH ONLY A WEEK'S NOTICE! IT'S OVER! 1/4*

Kyle Durden is with Necro Butcher and Delirious. Necro's all, "There's an old sayin' in Ohio, maybe it's in Tennessee. Fool me once… you, fool me. Shame on… shame on you. Fool… you can't get fooled again."

Bryan Danielson talks about his Muay Thai, Ju-Jitsu, Kung Fu, Karate, Amateur Wrestling, Shinto, Couture, Gotch-Gracie background and how it will help him in his match next week. Thank you.

Chris Hero (w/Sara Del Rey) vs. Eddie Kingston.
Shit just got real. Kingston charges in for some scufflin', and while these two have an extensive history in other organizations, we don't get much backstory here. Then again, you don't really need a good reason to want to kick Chris Hero's ass. He's just that annoying. To the floor, Hero gets the mat-covered senton (with Kingston helpfully holding the mat in place). Back in, Hero slaps him around, and Kingston asks for more. THANK YOU, SIR! MAY I HAVE ANOTHER! He's hulking up! Kingston hits a DDT and the backdrop driver, but he loses his cool and pummels Hero mercilessly until referee Todd Sinclair disqualifies him. LEAVE A MANATEE ALONE IN A HOTEL ROOM WITH KOBE BRYANT! IT'S OVER! Haven't read the spoilers, but this likely leads to a rematch. I'd rather have them build Kingston as a character whose weakness is that he lets his temper get the best of him, though. That is, if they plan on using him in any real capacity. Started to get good right before the finish. *1/2

Brent Albright objects to being hit with a shoe. And he especially objects to being kicked in the nuts. But he ESPECIALLY objects to losing. I think I'd object most to taking a tootsie in the chickenbag, but that's just me. He thanks Colt Cabana, last week's hero, for saving him. Cabana asks that time-honored question: Who throws a shoe? Honestly?

Necro Butcher & Delirious vs. Jimmy Jacobs & Brodie Lee.
Big brawl to start with the former members of the Age of the Fall taking it to the current ones. It's so chaotic, we gotta do SPLIT-SCREEN! Finally, Jacobs and Delirious brawl into the ring so we can start the match. Lee and Jacobs team up to suplex Necro from the ring to the floor, taking him out for a while. Delirious has to go it alone and does well for himself. Lee holds Delirious for a Jacobs double ax-handle, but they try again, and Delirious headbutts Jacobs in the gut. Lee boots Delirious, but Necro has recovered. IT'S TIME TO PLAY THE FEUD! Necro cleans house, but Jimmy dumps a bag of thumb tacks in his way, and poor Necro is barefoot. Delirious takes Jacobs to the floor as Necro scoops up some of the tack. He tosses them in Brodie Lee's face, and Brodie proceeds to sell like he just got misted by Muta after a chimichanga. That sets up a slam and Shadows Over Hell from Delirious. DROP THE BANHAMMER ON A WEASEL! IT'S OVER! Delirious gets some much-needed revenge points on the Age of the Fall. I'm a little burned out on this feud – and anything involving the Age of the Fall, really. Maybe it's time to pull the plug completely if they can't involve Lacey somehow. **1/2

The 411: They did a lot of things I liked, including the interviews with Lynn and Danielson in anticipation of the big four-way a few weeks from now. Most importantly, they hyped big matches down the road. One of the few advantages of taping multiple shows at the same time in the same venue is the ability to set up a match, hype it, and pay it off without disappointing the arena crowd or sacrificing the build. They also seem to have calmed the camera men down, although they still need one hard-camera position. Otherwise, it's disorienting. One more suggestion – while it's nice that they're trying to develop who these guys are with the Smacktalk and pre-match promos, the best way to show an audience who they are is to show them who they were. Do a segment on Jimmy Jacobs fall from grace. Do a segment on Bryan Danielson vs. Low Ki. Let us know the history of the ROH World Title. These little things, which don't cost any more money, would advance the show's cause by light years.