411’s TNA Impact Report 09.30.10

Hello good evening and welcome to our TNA Impact Report. I’m Chris Lansdell and it’s time to rock and roll!

We open with a package for RVD/Abyss.

Kurt Angle is backstage on the phone to Hulk Hogan, we see him getting into his elevator as the show starts. Nice touch. Angle is out with a mic, he wishes Hogan the best and says the Impact Zone misses him. Indeed it does as they chant for Hogan. He says he will win the title at Bound for Glory, and thanks Hogan for believing in him. He won’t let Hogan down on that or on the big favour Hogan asked of him, which I presume is beating up Abyss. Yup, seems that way. He calls out Abyss for a steel cage match, Abyss answers the call and Angle attacks him as he comes through the crowd. They fight backstage, Angle gets the upper hand as they brawl through the backstage area. Abys regains control in the locker room, whipping Angle into a wall, then throws a ladder into Angle. He goes to waffle Angle with a chair but Angle kicks him in the gut, takes the chair and lays in two chair shots. He beats Abyss down but Abyss gets a low blow then throws Angle into the lockers. Security and road agents come in to split the pair up.

Back from commercial and we are still in the middle of a pull-apart brawl between Angle and Abyss.

Beer! Money! vs. Tommy Dreamer and Rhino

Fourtune is out with Beer Money. EV 2.0 is out with Dreamer and Rhino. Dreamer gets a crossbody on Roode early, Rhino comes in and they get a double back elbow for two. Ahhh it’s a lumberjack match. Backdrop by Rhino, he looks for the gore but Roode flees to the floor. Shots by Rhino, Storm kicks him in the back of the head from the apron and then tags in. Snap mare, knee drop and leg drop by Storm get 2. Roode is in, he gets a pair of short-arm knee lifts followed by a back suplex for 2. Double vertical suplex by Beer Money! Wait for it…

BEER!

MONEY~!

Rhino gets tossed to the floor and beaten down by Fourtune. Back inside he eats some shots from Roode. Bear hug applied by Roode, Rhino breaks it and gets a belly to bely suplex for 2. Storm tags in, so does Dreamer! Shots for all, dropkick to Roode and a neckbreaker to Storm. Dreamer goes for the DVD, Storm escapes and goes for the Last Call. Dreamer catches it and locks in a crossface. Roode breaks it up, Rhino clotheslines him to the floor where a brawl breaks out involving the lumberjacks. AJ Styles gets on the apron and spits something into Dramer’s eyes! Botched back cracker by Storm gets 2. Storm has a beer bottle…Dreamer ducks! DVD!!! 1…2…3!

Winners: Dreamer and Rhino via pinfall (Dreamer on Storm, DVD)
Rating: **½ Not bad at all, and worked into the story well

Foley gets on the mic and says that’s enough fighting, and calls Ric Flair into the ring, saying they need a resolution to their differences. He tells the EV2.0 guys to let him in as we go to commercial.

We’re back, and Flair asks if Foley wants to talk to Ric Flair, Wrestling God. Foley says he wants Flair the man, can he come out? Flair does a turn and says just like Superman he can turn that on. What do you want to talk about asshole? Foley says the rest of the world is focused on 10.10.10 but he wants to think about 10.7.10. He told Dixie that he wanted to end his differences with Flair live on national TV, and he asks Flair to meet him in the ring one week from tonight, LIVE, one on one for the very last time. Flair drops his mic and leaves the ring, grabs a book from a fat chick ringside, and brings it into the ring. ZOMG he removes the jacket!! It’s Foley’s new book by the way. “You? YOU, the best selling author, father of the year, couch potato, want to wrestle Ric Flair live? Really? REALLY?” He stamps on the book, drops an elbow and a knee on it and says “The answer is yes you son of a bitch. Now how are you gonna get out of it?” Foley says he isn’t going to, there’s a good chance he’ll fail, but he talks about loving wrestling and a reviewer who wondered whether he loved wrestling as much as his family. He says after a phone call from Flair the day after Christmas, he felt the burning and he felt the glow and he hates to admit it, but he realised he needs Flair to bring out the best in him. Flair says that’s what he does for a living then punches himseld until he bleeds. Foley copies him and says two can play that game. Flair asks if Foley thinks he’s afraid and says Foley is not better than him. Foley’s out of shape and a family man and he loves that for him. The crowd chants for Foley. Flair says he will have his whole family there next week, not for his retirement but to see the end of Foley and the end of EV2.0. He says Foley is EV2.0, he’s their spokesperson. He brings up when Dreamer called him hardcore and calls Foley a stupid bastard. Foley says that Flair’s been wrestling 39 years, it took him that long to figure out he’s hardcore and Flair calls HIM the stupid bastard? This is great stuff, they are right in each other’s faces. Foley says Flair is what the business and hardcore are all about. He says Flair is walking the walk and talking the talk like he hasn’t been able to in years. He calls Flair renewed and Flair says he loves that about Foley, he’s got it back and his balls are big again. He’s gonna beat Foley within an inch of his life. Foley says he feels like he’s been coasting since he’s been in TNA. He doesn’t like Flair but he doesn’t hate Flair, he’s known him for 21 years and he stirs up a lot of conflicting emotions in Foley. He wants Flair in a Last Man Standing match. Flair agrees and says if Foley wins, he will pull down his pants and kiss Foley’s ass on national TV. Was that necessary? Flair then Woos his way up the ramp. Fucking insane promo, but ass-kissing? How tawdry.

Anderson is with Bischoff and asks how come he never got called by Hulk Hogan. Bischoff says Hogan and Angle have a lot in common, but it doesn’t mean that Hogan has no confidence in him. Bischoff smooths it over.

The Motor City Machine Guns WALK~!

Ink Inc vs. Generation Me

Oh God Gen Me are murder on the fingers. Waistlock takedown by Moore, Jeremy escapes into an arm wringer, Moore fights out and gets a pair of arm drags. Inverted atomic drop and a right hand followed by a leg drop by Moore for 2. Another arm drag to Jeremy this time. Tag to Neal, double back elbow and Moore hiptosses Neal onto Max for 2. Dropkick by Neal gets 2 more. Whip, Neal charges into a boot but Max misses a moonsault press of the top and appears to have tweaked his knee. APPEARS. While Neal is being all concerned he gets jumped by Jeremy. Max slides in and stomps away on Neal. Tag to Jeremy who chokes Neal in the corner but charges into a forearm. Jeremy fights back and tags in Max, double team dropkick for 2. Chinlock now by Max, Neal tries to fight back but eats a dropkick for 2. Tag to Jeremy, Neal breaks up the attempted double team and comes in on fire. Top rope crossbody to Max! Dropkick and leg lariat! Spin kick to Max gets 2, Jeremy saves. Reversed whip by Gen Me, Moore counters the double team into a double rana! Moore tosses Jeremy to the floor and gets a springboard moonsault press for 2! Neal fights off Jeremy but misses a charge and speared the post. Max reversed a whip and hits a HUGE kick to the balls behind the ref’s back! 1…2….3!

Winners: Generation Me via pinfall (Max on Moore, Punt to the pubic region)
Rating: ***¼ Spots in places, good story in others. Very nice.

Post-match Gen Me tries to beat down Shannon Moore, the Guns make the save.

Mr. Anderson vs. Samoa Joe

The Pope’s music hits and he is out to broadcast, and he has Sting and Nash with him. Joe backs Anderson into the corner and beats him down with rapid-fire shots. Anderson grabs a headlock but gets backed into the corner. Back flip kick to Anderson. Chops and shots to Anderson, he fights back and takes it to Joe in the corner now. Anderson fights back hard but runs into a bulldozer. FACE WASH by Joe for 2. Again Anderson fights back, eats a stiff chop but kicks Joe in the face. Clothesline, back elbow and dropkick by Anderson for 2. KOKINA KLUTCH out of nowhere! Anderson is fading, but he’s hanging in…jawbreaker counter! MIC CHECK! 1…2…3!

Winner: Mr. Anderson via pinfall (Mic Check)

Post-match Kevin Nash tries to recruit Samoa Joe. He then gets on the mic and says that it’s amazing Hogan is in hospital. For 7 months Sting has been saying what was going on with Hogan and Bischoff. He says the rest of the locker room was duped, but not the 3 guys in the ring know what’s going on. Pope takes the mic and says it amazes him how Bischoff tries to pull the wool over Pope’s eyes. He calls Bischoff out and says that Hogan and Bischoff will come out on the losing end of this one. Sting’s turn and he says things they shared went bad. He does an informal survey a la Razon Ramon, and the crowd seems to be there to see the bad guys. He wants to know who’s wearing the black hard hats. He then proposes a 6-man: Nash, Sting and Pope vs. Hogan, Jarrett and Samoa Joe. No more games Hulk! At BFG he wants to show the world what’s really going on.

That brings out Bischoff and Tessmacher. Bischoff calls this disgusting. He says two guys at the end of their careers but says that’s part of the business. He talks about Nash in WCW and says nothing has changed. He then moves on to Pope and says Pope disappoints him the most. He had his shot and lost. He bitched, and Bischoff gave him another shot…which he also lost. Bischoff says other talents have no problems about conspiracies, and questions the courage of the three. He says he doesn’t normally speak for Hogan, but he says that Hogan will be on Impact next week and will answer the challenge then.

AJ Styles and Ric Flair address Kendrick.

Back from commercial and The Beautiful People (both branches) are with Miss Tessmacher, they argue and Tessmacher yells at them. They are trying to iron out a contract for a title match but it keeps devolving into a slanging match. Tessmacher says this is not a BFF club, and there will be a four way match: Angelina vs Velvet vs Tara vs Madison for the Knockouts title. We’re back to a shrieking match again as security keeps them apart. Tessmacher’s phone rings and says she’ll be there in 20 minutes for the usual. I wish I was on the other end…

AJ Styles vs. Brian Kendrick

I love this Kendrick gimmick where he’s a nut. He’s in a white Jedi robe tonight. AJ is solo as Flair is apparently going to be on commentary. He says TNA doesn’t know what they got into with him, and he is going to pick Foley’s bones. He’s off to ringside as Kendrick and AJ lick up. Headlock by AJ, Kendrick breaks it, escapes a scoop slam but dropkicks thin air. AJ misses a flying forearm, Kendrick hits a dropkick and a forearm and gets a rollup for 2. Back suplex by AJ switches the momentum. Morgan chokes Kendrick while the ref us distracted. AJ stomps on Kendrick but gets cocky and eats a series of dropkicks until levelling Kendrick with a clothesline. Whip by AJ is blocked, STIFF dropkick and a running tornado DDT. He goes up top and DIVES onto Morgan on the outside!!! AJ goes for a tope through the ropes but Kendrick kicks him on the way! Kendrick up top…MORGAN crotches him! Faithbreaker coming…CONNECTS! 1…2…3!

Winner: AJ Styles via pinfall (Faithbreaker)
Rating: **½ Not bad. Not great, could have been much faster and better, but not bad

RVD talks about returning when he is fully recovered and not before.

Steel Cage Match: Abyss vs. Kurt Angle

Hobo Abyss is out with Janice. Angle wastes little time in attacking Abyss and stomping on him in the corner. He beats and pounds on Abyss but makes the mistake of running the ropes and gets shoulder blocked. Abyss chokes him in the corner and lays in some rights. He charges but Angle blocks and hits a second-rope shoulder block for 2. To the cage goes Abyss, Angle stands on his neck and then takes him to the other cage wall. Angle has Janice! He tosses her out of the cage and grinds Abyss into the wall as we go to commercial.

We are back and Angle is still punching Abyss. He runs at Abyss again and this time eats a big boot. HARD toss to the cage by Abyss. A second toss into the cage wall has Kurt bleeding. Abyss punches the cut and wow, Kurt caught a good one. Another toss into the cage as Angle is streaming blood onto the mat. Angle escapes a powerslam and goes low to the knee. A series of vicious rights by Angle, he goes up top…FROG SPLASH! 1…2…no. AGAIN Angle charges, this time he gets goozled…Angle rolls through! Ankle lock! Abyss kicks him off then hits the chokeslam for 2. Abyss charges, Angle moves, Angle Slam countered into a Shock Treatment! 1…2…no! Abyss goes up…to the top rope??? BIG SPLASH…MISSES! Angle Slam! 1…2…NO! Angle wants the door opened but then changes his mind. Straps are down, Kurt is going to the top of the cage…backwards…no no no…Abyss is up and throws the ref into the cage, disturbing Angle’s balance. Angle is on the top rope, LEAPS…BOTCH! They tried to go with a counter into the Black Hole Slam but Angle didn’t hold on, or Abyss dropped him. Back to the cage wall goes Angle. Abyss goes to check on the ref, then goes to goozle Angle…Mr. Anderson is out! He climbs into the cage and takes it to Abyss right up until Abyss hits the Black Hole Slam. Abyss is the only one standing out of 4 men in the cage. Abyss tears the door off its hinges and walks out of the cage…to fetch JANICE! Angle intercepts him and sends him running as Angle holds Janice and we go to Reaction!

Winner: Abyss (I think)
Rating: **3/4 Very good brawl with a crap ending.