411’s TNA Impact Wrestling Report 5.2.13

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“PREVIOUSLY ON IMPACT WRESTLING” VIDEO: Hulk Hogan confronts Bully Ray, Sting returns to save Hogan from an Aces & Eights beatdown.

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We go “live” to the Kovalchick Complex in Indiana, PA and Todd Keneley welcomes the home audience as we pan the crowd. After some hype for tonight’s show “Not Quite the nWo Theme” kicks up bringing out GM Hulk Hogan to a loud ovation. Hogan makes his way to the ring as Tenay brings up the tension between he and Sting, and Taz says he dodged a bullet last week.

The song dies down and the crowd briefly chants “Hogan!” before he begins speaking. Hogan says he and Sting almost came to blows at the end of last week and the best thing they can do right now is to get him out to the ring to clear things up. And almost on cue out Sting comes, the Kovalchick Complex bathed in strobe effects. Hogan says last week didn’t end with a pretty picture between the two, and says he was wrong about pushing Sting away. Hogan apologizes and says he made a huge mistake. Hogan extends the hand and Sting immediately shakes it. Hogan says he should have pulled Sting closer due to the loyalty and trust between them so they could team up and deal with The Aces & Eights. Sting says “all is good” and it’s water under the bridge. Sting asks Hogan for the permission to get a six-man tag team together for next week to face The Aces & Eights. Hogan is all for this idea and tells Sting that’s on him to figure it out because he’s got to figure out who will face Bully Ray at Slammiversary.

Matt Morgan makes his way out to interrupt Sting and Hogan. Morgan assumes Sting is going to be handed a title shot, but Hogan says his mistake was interrupting before he finished. Hogan finishes up and says that the title shot won’t be handed to Sting or Morgan…they’ll have to wrestle for it in the main event. Hogan drops the mic and exits, leaving Sting and Morgan to stare one another down and trash talk as “Not Quite the nWo Theme” plays.

• THOUGHTS: I actually liked that Sting and Hogan resolved their issue quickly. That’s how friendship works: you blow up at each other but then you let cooler heads prevail and put it behind you. The segment overall served its purpose to set up the main event (one they even alluded to a few weeks ago when Sting was originally kicked out of the arena by Hogan), but it was also a bit lackluster mic-wise. Hogan seemed a little scatterbrained.

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“THE RETURN OF CHRIS SABIN” VIDEO: Chris Sabin discusses his injury from last June and how heartbreaking it was. Sabin says he’s more motivated and driven than ever to make it to the top. Sabin says his goal from here on out is to be the World Heavyweight Champion. He’s in action next against Zema Ion and Sonjay Dutt in, erm, an X-Division Title Contender’s Match.

• THOUGHTS: Is Sabin the new Aries? FINGERS CROSSED.

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-Commercial Break-

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Kurt Angle is backstage in the workout room, pacing back and forth and ranting about The Aces & Eights. He says tonight he issued a challenge to any member of the biker gang. Angle says you can hurt him and beat him, but you can’t stop him.

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Zema Ion makes his way out for the opening contest of the evening. Christy Hemme introduces Sonjay Dutt first, however, since he’s already in the ring. Chris Sabin gets the final entrance to celebrate his return.

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Match #1: Chris Sabin Vs. Zema Ion Vs. Sonjay Dutt in an X-Division Title Contender’s Match

Sabin and Dutt immediately attack Ion and send him out to the floor. Sabin and Dutt lock up and Dutt gets the first move with a hurricanrana followed by an armdrag takedown. Ion climbs the apron and Dutt sends him back to the floor. Sabin takes Dutt down with an enziguri for the first 2-count of the contest. Sabin and Dutt trade waistlocks and Ion ends up taking both men out. Ion chokes Sabin on the middle rope followed up by the running double knees to the back.

Ion drops Dutt throat-first on the top rope, but Sabin comes up and hits a series of loud chops (Meanwhile Tenay announces Suicide has been voted in as the other X-Division Title contender). Ion drops Sabin by the hair then tries a backslide to cover Dutt. Dutt rolls over and Ion ends up rolling both men up for a 2-count. Dutt takes Sabin down with a multiple-revolution DDT followed by the standing shooting star press for the 1…2…Ion breaks the count up. Ion drops Dutt with a DDT for the 1…2…kickout. Dutt blocks a roll-up and takes Ion out with a superkick. Sabin then takes Ion out himself and hits a Death Valley Driver on Dutt, who lands on Ion.

Sabin ties Dutt up in the tree of woe then launches Ion into their prone foe. Sabin gets a running head start and connects with a running kick followed by his new finisher for the 1…2…3.

Winner [via Pinfall]: Chris Sabin (4:01)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: A short match, but it did the job in reacclamating the audience to Chris Sabin. And if Sabin is pursuing the X-Division Title, does that mean the whole “cash it in for a shot at the World Title?” rule is still in effect despite the loss of the Destination X PPV?

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Jessie Godderz and Robbie E are backstage talking about their next match. Godderz brings up Joey Ryan to be their third partner against Rob Terry to make their upcoming match easier (saying “sleazy means easy”). Robbie E admonishes Godderz on his poor rhyming skills as we go to commercial.

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-Commercial Break-

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Bully Ray is backstage with The Aces & Eights. He talks about Hogan and Sting mocking them earlier and says no one mocks them. Ray says he isn’t worried about whoever he’s going to face in Boston because he’ll get the job done. Ray turns his attention to Kurt Angle and says he’s been a thorn in their ass since Day 1. Ray says he wants Angle taken out and taken care of the way that Ray took care of Jeff Hardy. Ray asks who it’s going to be. Wes Brisco and Garett Bischoff both offer to take him on but D-Lo Brown interrupts and says he’s the one who helped them win and wants the honor of destroying the Olympic Gold Medalist. Ray asks Brown if he can guarantee he’ll get the job done and he does. They toast their beer bottles to make it a deal.

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Robbie E, Jessie Godderz, and Joey Ryan all make their way out for the next contest to Robbie E’s music. Their opponent Rob Terry makes his way out second.

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Match #2: Rob Terry Vs. Robbie E, Joey Ryan, & Jessie Godderz in a Handicap Match

Robbie E and Godderz force Ryan to start the match off first by escaping the ring before the bell sounds. Ryan turns into Terry and is clubbed down with a forearm. Terry hits a running elbow in the corner and follows up with a high back bodydrop. Terry applies a front facelock and Godderz attacks from behind to distract him. Robbie E distracts Terry further and Ryan clips the knee. Godderz forces Ryan to tag him in so he can get a piece of the pie. After a few shots Robbie E tags in for further punishment. The quick tags continue as the trio try to take Terry down. Robbie E applies a sleeperhold to knock Terry out, but Terry gets up and breaks the hold by ramming Robbie E into the corner. Robbie E sidesteps a corner splash and goes back on the attack.

Ryan blocks Godderz’s hand so he gets the tag in. Ryan turns around after some brief arguing and walks right into a slam. Robbie E and Godderz immediately attack Terry and Ryan joins in. Terry shakes all three off, sending them flying. Terry grabs Ryan and Godderz, hitting a double backdrop suplex then hits the standing spinebuster (Kenely calls it the “Beast Bomb”) on Ryan for the 1…2…3.

Winner [via Pinfall]: Rob Terry (3:34)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: That was a fun comedy squash that made Terry look strong but ultimately it amounts to nothing more than filler, at least at this point. And if they don’t giev Terry something else to do it’s going to get old quick, if it hasn’t already to some viewers.

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Austin Aries and Bobby Roode are headed to the ring to address the TNA audience. They are up next.

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-Commercial Break-

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Austin Aries & Bobby Roode Have Something to Say

Former tag team champions Austin Aries & Bobby Roode make their way out to Roode’s theme song. Tenay hypes up their #1 contenders match against Bad Influence on next week’s show. Roode is on the mic first and admits Daniels/Kazarian got into his head last about their desire to reform “Fortune”. Roode says it wasn’t about reforming Fortune so much as their jealousy over his partnership with Aries, as evidenced by how they cost them the belts last week. Aries is up next and says while Bad Influence are best friends, he and Roode like each other just enough to have a common goal. Aries says he and Roode are about winning matches because they are former World Champions.

The tirade is interrupted by Bad Influence (Christopher Daniels & Frankie Kazarian) in the flesh. Daniels is first up on the mic and says Aries and Roode aren’t the next Tag Team Champions nor are they even the best tag team in the ring. Daniels says everyone knows Aries and Roode are a pale imitation of Bad Influence. Daniels says the next champs are standing in the ring right now and, spoiler-alert, it’s them. Roode angrily says they will do whatever it takes to be champions again. Kazarian says Aries and Roode can’t outbeat them or outcheat them. Kazarian calls them “Bad Influence-Lite”.

Tag Team Champs Chavo Guerrero Jr. & Hernandez make their way out to interrupt as the guys in the ring are annoyed they can’t get through their spiel without these guys interrupting. Guerrero says the time for talk is over and it’s now time for action. Guerrero says they just talked to Hulk Hogan and there’s going to be a special guest referee. Guerrero says it’s not them and introduces James Storm out to the arena. Storm makes his way out with beers and he and the tag team champs toast while staring Bad Influence and Aries/Roode down.

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Sting catches up with Kurt Angle in the workout room. Sting asks if he’s ready for tonight’s match and Angle says yes. Sting then shuts the door to have a private conversation with Angle as we go to commercial.

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-Commercial Break-

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Tara is upset about Taryn Terrell and is letting her partner for tonight, Gail Kim, hear all about it. Kim calls her down and says that tonight they need to embarrass Terrell and Mickie James. Tara says “I’ll see you out there” and exits, leaving Kim to conclude with a sly comment about being the one to get the victory.

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Chris Sabin cuts a post-match promo about his match and the fans and being a wrestler and stuff you’ve heard wrestlers say before.

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D-Lo Brown makes his way out for the next contest, purposefully walking with a scowl on his face through the crowd. His opponent, Kurt Angle, makes his way out second and gets a solid home state reaction from the PA crowd. Angle and Brown stare each other down as we go to commercial.

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-Commercial Break-

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The crowd chants “USA!” in support of Angle as we come back from break. Brown gets on the mic and says it’s not good enough to just beat him; he needs to humiliate him. Brown says he wants to do something no man has done before: beat Angle in an “I QUIT MATCH”. Brown hits Angle with the mic and the bell rings.

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Match #3: Kurt Angle Vs. D-Lo Brown in an I-Quit Match

Angle fights back from the mic shot and locks on a sort-of STF. Brown refuses to quit and Angle relinquishes the hold as Mr. Anderson and company make their way out to “watch”. Brown attacks the distracted Angle from behind but the latter reverses a suplex attempt into one of his own. Brown bails out to the floor and limps around as he tries to get his breath. Brown pulls Angle out by the legs and rams him shoulder-first into the post. Brown grabs the bell hammer but Angle ducks the shot and it clangs against the post. Brown keeps working over Angle’s left arm, pulling at it as Angle is caught behind the ring post.

Brown rolls Angle in and legdrops the arm. Brown wrenches the arm with a wristlock. Angle fights his way out but runs into a spinning heel kick from Brown. Brown rams the arm into the canvas then applies a cross armbreaker. The ref asks if Angle wants to quit and he responds with an emphatic “HELL NO!”. Angle spins around and goes for the Ankle Lock but Brown kicks him off and follows up with a clothesline. Brown applies a cobra clutch to knock Angle out. Brown yells at Angle to quit but he just won’t.

Angle breaks the hold and connects with five German suplexes in a row before the ref asks him if he wants to quit. Brown tells the ref to kiss his ass and Angle finishes with a six German, this time releasing the hold. Angle pulls the straps down and applies the ANKLE LOCK. Brown refuses to quit and kicks Angle off. Brown follows up with a Samoan Drop and both men are down. Brown goes for a power bomb but Angle rolls through and applies the ANKLE LOCK once more. Brown tries to roll through it but Angle holds in and grapevines the leg for added oomph. Brown screams and taps but he has to say the words. Brown yells “I QUIT!” and the bell rings.

Winner [via Submission]: Kurt Angle (8:04)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: A much better match than I was expecting but honestly it didn’t really grab me as a viewer. Angle’s multiple Germans was a cool spot though.

POST-MATCH: Kurt Angle celebrates his win as Mr. Anderson and The Aces & Eights stalk away in anger. Christy Hemme interviews Angle on the entrance ramp. Angle brushes off his victory and calls out AJ Styles. Will he make his way out? We’ll find out after this commercial break.

• THOUGHTS: Interesting stuff with Mr. Anderson and The Aces & Eights. Is Anderson gunning for Brown’s position? Maybe.

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-Commercial Break-

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Kurt Angle Calls Out AJ Styles

Kurt Angle is still in the ring and still calling AJ Styles out. Finally the music cues up and out comes “The Phenomenal One” from backstage. Styles gets in the ring and stares Angle down. Angle says Styles doesn’t look the same as he used to, like he wants to take his head off. Angle tells Styles he won’t get far if he does because he’s in his home area of Western Pennsylvania (cue the home state pop). Angle tells Styles that joining The Aces & Eights would be the easy way out then tells him that he’s the reason he came to TNA in the first place. Angle says he can respect the stuff Styles is going through but he needs to know where he stands in the war. Angle says if he’s with TNA they’re cool but not they’re going to have problems. Angle tells Styles he needs to make his decision next week and exits the ring.

• THOUGHTS: Nothing makes someone want to join a cause more than browbeating them and delivering harsh ultimatums. Styles should join The Aces & Eights if everyone in TNA is going to threaten him like this. Also I doubt he makes his decision next week; not when there’s a PPV so close on the horizon anyway.

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EARLIER ON IMPACT: Hulk Hogan signs Sting/Morgan for the #1 Contendership as tonight’s main main event.

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Matt Morgan is backstage and angry. Morgan has been waiting ever since Hogan entered TNA for him to do the right thing. Morgan says he’s no longer waiting for the ball, he’s taking it. Morgan says he’s going to gut through Sting tonight and you are looking at the next World Champion. Morgan angrily storms off.

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Gail Kim makes her way out for the next match, a Knockouts Tag Team partner. We see a clip of Taryn Terrell beating Gail Kim a few weeks ago as Kim makes her way to the ring. Her partner, Tara, makes her way out second and we see clips of her defeat at the hands of Terrell last week. ODB is in the ring already to act as Knockouts Ref. Their first opponent, Taryn Terrell, makes her way out and poses for the crowd as we go to commercial.

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-Commercial Break-

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“Hardcore Country” kicks up as we come back from break, bringing out Terrell’s tag team partner Mickie James. Keneley brings up her loss against Velvet Sky last week.

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Match #4: Taryn Terrell & Mickie James Vs. Gail Kim & Tara

ODB takes a swig as Terrell takes it to both Kim and Tara. Tara grabs Terrell from behind and holds her arms for Kim to attack but before that can happen James grabs Kim from behind. Terrell and Kim send the ladies right into each other and they knock heads before bailing to the outside. Tara and Kim argue, leaving them open for a Terrell baseball slide. Terrell rolls Kim back in and clotheslines her in the corner. Kim reverses an Irish whip but Terrell ducks a clothesline and James tags in. James connects with a move on Kim and covers for a 2-count. James applies an armbreaker and Kim gets to the ropes to force a break.

James and Kim trade forearms and the former is winning the shootout until she eats a boot to the gut. Kim goes for a clothesline but James slides under takes Kim down with an enziguri for 2. Kim sends James out to the apron. James takes Tara out but Kim pushes her off the apron and to the ground. Tara rolls James back in and Kim picks her up by the hair before dropping her with a short-arm clothesline. Tara gets the boot off and Kim rams James into it face-first.

Tara tags in and she and Kim stomp James all the way to the mat. Tara hangs James by the hair before being forced to drop her and follows up with an elbowdrop for 2. Tara turns her attention to Terrell and slaps her hard. She accidentally distracts the ref, allowing a brief doubleteam on James from Kim and Tara. Tara locks James in a Muta Lock until Terrell breaks it up. Kim tags back in and hits a soccer kick right to the gut. Kim goes for the cover but doesn’t even get a 1. James mounts a comeback, however, and takes Kim down with a hurricanrana. Both Knockouts go for the crossbody and they collide into each other abdomen-first.

Terrell gets the hot tag as Tara tags in for her side. Terrell repeatedly levels Tara with clotheslines and a back elbow followed by a snap suplex. Terrell heads to the top and connects with the crossbody for the 1…2…Kim makes the save. James and Kim cancel each other out and Terrell rolls Tara up for the 1…2…3!

Winners [via Pinfall]: Taryn Terrell & Mickie James (6:26)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: …Yup that’s definitely my favorite match of the night thus far. A really good Knockouts tag team match and Terrell continues to look good in the ring (wrestling-wise, pervs). I just hope Terrell’s whole “win with a roll-up” thing is just a phase though.

POST-MATCH: Tara and Kim attack the winners from behind. James and Tara battle on the outside, James getting the upper hand. Back in the ring Kim takes it to Terrell followed by EAT DEFEAT. Kim slams the back of Terrell’s head on the canvas and throws her into the corner. Kim rolls out and applies a ring post figure four. Officials force Kim to let go and she looks at the damage she has caused on the ramp.

• THOUGHTS: RING POST FIGURE FOUR FOR THE WIN. Awesome. I love that move. Awesome beat down by Kim; funny how the one interesting Knockouts storyline doesn’t involve the actual championship.

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-Commercial Break-

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The Aces & Eights are backstage reacting to D-Lo Brown’s loss. Bully Ray repeatedly asks Mr. Anderson if he actually said “I Quit!”. Ray says he’ll do with Brown next week, then brings up the six-man tag team main event next week. Ray names Anderson and Devon as his partners for the match. They will face Sting, Kurt Angle, and a mystery partner.

• THOUGHTS: I’m probably more excited for The Aces & Eights to “blood out” D-Lo than I should be.

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Austin Aries & Bobby Roode are backstage. Roode says they will walk into Tupelo, MS and become #1 contenders next week without a doubt.

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Matt Morgan makes his way out for the main event, wearing the stolen robe once again. His opponent, Sting, is out second. Sting’s in his Hall of Fame shirt and he’s definitely not taking it off to wrestle.

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Main Event: Sting Vs. Matt Morgan in a #1 Contenders Match

Morgan backs Sting in the corner and headbutts him down to the mat repeatedly. Morgan whips Sting into the corner and follows up with a clothesline. Morgan connects with another headbutt and chokes Sting in the corner while making faces at the crowd. Sting starts fighting back but is floored with a chokeslam for the 1…2…kickout. Morgan is in control as we go to commercial.

-Commercial Break-

The action has spilled outside as we come back from break. Sting rebounds and sends Morgan face-first into the ring steps. Morgan however easily responds with a series of knees to the gut. Morgan rolls Sting back in and chokes “The Icon” until forced to break via ref count. Morgan climbs back outside and legdrops Sting on the apron. Morgan goes for another but Sting moves out of the way and rolls to the outside. Sting sends Morgan into the guardrail on opposite sides of the ringside area. Sting rakes the eyes and sends him back into the ring steps.

Sting rolls Morgan back in but Morgan reverses an Irish whip and connects with a sidewalk slam for the 1…2…kickout. Morgan works Sting over with a series of power moves followed by a clothesline. Sting gets to his feet and starts fighting back but Morgan stops that with a scoop slam. A follow-up elbow drop comes up empty, however, and Sting sidesteps a corner splash immediately after. Sting mounts the comeback with a series of clotheslines followed by the Stinger Splash. Morgan grabs Sting by the throat and throws him in the corner. Morgan connects with a series of back elbows but Sting doesn’t feel it and goes back on the attack. Sting goes for another Stinger Splash but Morgan catches him with the CARBON FOOTPRINT for the 1…2…KICKOUT.

Morgan goes for another Carbon Footprint and hits nothing but turnbuckle jamming his knee. Sting kicks him down to the mat and applies the SCORPION DEATH LOCK. Morgan struggles and struggles, biting his hand to deal with the pain. Morgan crawls towards the ropes and finally reaches them to force the break. Sting immediately drags him back in the middle of the ring and reapplies the SCORPION DEATH LOCK. Morgan tries to fight out but ends up passing out in the hold.

Winner and NEW #1 Contender [via Knockout]: Sting (13:08)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: The conflict between Sting and Bully Ray has been building since October and when it comes to possible main events this one makes the most sense and has the most history. So in that regard Sting winning doesn’t bother me. And for what it’s worth they kept Matt Morgan strong by having him pass out in the Death Lock instead of tapping like a chump. Those positives aside…this was a dull main event in a night of dull matches action-wise. An entirely skippable edition of Impact this week.

POST-MATCH:: Bully Ray and The Aces & Eights immediately make their way out. Ray gets on the apron and jaws at Sting as we conclude this week’s show.

*****
When not covering Impact (almost) every Thursday for 411, Jon can be found covering pro wrestling on his own site Pro Wrestling Update. You can also follow him on Twitter if that’s your sort-of bag, baby.