411’s WWE Smackdown Report 11.15.13

O hay ya’ll.

SHOW ON!

Championship Roll Call:
WWE Champion: Randy Orton
World Champion: John Cena
US Champion: Dean Ambrose
IC Champion: Curtis Axel
Diva’s Champion: AJ Lee
WWE World Tag Team Champions: Cody Rhodes and Goldust.

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WWE Smackdown Report 11.8.13

– We open up the show with video package covering the awesome ending to this week’s Raw.

– We get some dramatic music showing stills of Alberto Del Rio attacking John Cena’s bad arm with a chair on Raw. ADR wants an arm wrestling contest tonight on Smackdown. That’s kind of funny actually.

The Usos vs. Rowan and Harper (w/ Bray Wyatt) Jey dashes at Rowan to try and get an early advantage. Rowan isn’t having any of that. In comes Harper off a quick tag. Jey comes out on top of a punch exchange and gets to work with kicks and strikes. Jimmy comes in and they double team Harper with some kicks. Jimmy runs at Harper but eats an uppercut. The crowd heys along with Harper before Rowan tags in. Rowan locks in a headlock variation similar to a nerve hold. Bray rocks in his chair. Jimmy tries to make it to his feet but Rowan clubs him down. Jimmy hits the ropes and gets some quick running strikes. He hits the ropes and hits an awful looking neckbreaker. Jimmy delivers a sunset flip bomb and a sitout dropkick. There’s audible Harper chants with Rowan in the ring. Interesting.

-Commercial Break-

Harper is gator rolling Jey around the ring as we come back from commercial break. Lets go Harper chants? I didn’t realize he was getting over singularly. Yeah yeah yeahhhh. He catapults Jey throat first into the bottom rope. In comes Rowan with a sweet looking back breaker. JBL doesn’t understand how Rowan and Harper are called brothers. Jey hits an enziguri to change the pace. Hot tag!? Double hot tag! Clotheslines and superkicks for the heels! Jey hits an ax handle off the top. He goes for the butt smash but Harper hits a huge big boot! ONE! TWO! NAHHHH. Jimmy breaks it up. Things break down momentarily and Rowan finds his way on the floor with Jimmy. Jey hits a superkick! NOOOO! TWO! Everybody gets involved for a minute and by time the legal men are left alone in the ring, Jey walks right into the huge discus clothesline from Harper. THREE.

So can we all collectively get behind the tag team division this time? They’ve established it far more than their last attempt with Team Hell No and The Shield basically holding the entire division together for a lengthy period of time. Despite a lot of the same teams re-emerging, they all seem to be more focused, unique, and generally better at working each other than before. We’re being treated to multiple feuds at once and a general leveling of the playing field which in turn, makes every tag match seem substantially more important than a year ago. The Wyatt Family and The Usos delivered a good match to open the show and get the crowd going. The audience was noticeably quiet when the bell rang. A well worked and lengthy (by TV standards) opener had them biting for all of the near falls in the closing sequence. Formulaic isn’t a bad thing.

OFFICIAL RESULT: Rowan and Harper @ 7:53 aired pinfall
RATING: ***

– 3v2 attack from the Wyatts on The Usos after the match! Jimmy initiated the attack after a clean loss but Cole doesn’t acknowledge that. Sister Abigail lays Jimmy to sleep. Bray Wyatt says that they’ll teach the world how to leave a scar at Survivor Series. They’ll also turn heroes into victims.

– Bray Wyatt is heard laughing after the match. The lights turn off again and their tron intro shows up. Wyatt blows out the flame and we go to break. Kind of a weird ending to the segment.

-Commercial Break-

– We get a video package covering the Heyman promo and Punk’s subsequent attack on Raw.

– Ryback and Axel are backstage. Ryback says that if Axel is still a Heyman guy, Ryback isn’t teaming with him. He’ll have a problem with Axel too. They go back and forth about sucking up to Heyman.

Axel: He proposed to you! He kissed you on the cheek one time!
Ryback: That was then…

– They get on the same page before we cut to Truth. Truth and The PTPs take turns free styling. R-Truth says that Union Jacks are what’s important tonight. THREE MAN MILLIONS DANCE~!

-Commercial Break-

– William Regal pimps WWE merch. Vickie kicks him out and makes Khali take his place. This didn’t work for me because we were supposed to collectively sigh with relief when Regal got the boot but he was far more entertaining.

Natalya vs. Tamina Snuke The best thing about Total Divas is the push Natalya has received and her seperation from Khali and Swoggle. Natalya goes right for the legs with a tackle attempt to get the amazon down. AJ distracts Natalya quickly on the apron but it doesn’t work. Natalya makes her tap with the Sharpshooter and that’s all she wrote.

I’m not sure why they’d bother making Tamina look that incompetent besides time constraints. I understand the Natalya defeating Tamina thing after losing her title match with AJ on Main Eventdue to Tamina but the quick match didn’t accomplish anything a video package couldn’t.

OFFICIAL RESULT: Natalya @ 1:04 via submission
RATING: SQUASH

– Big Show reeked havoc on Raw. Said havoc ended in a chokeslam through the announce table on Randy Orton. Can we maybe get a stip on that match? I’m not trying to watch Orton and Big Show go at it in singles action. I fear multiple rematches.

– Maddox and Vickie go at it in a little scuttle backstage. Vickie is bowing out of decision making on the next Raw. Maddox has veto power over her and he didn’t use it. Hey Creative, don’t write anything that you don’t plan on sticking to next month. It’s going to be Maddox dealing with Kane alone next week. Intrigue.

-Commercial Break-

The Prime Time Players and R-Truth vs. The Union Jacks Michael Cole legitimately asks if Truth said the word pimple and laughs. Holy shit, that’s a long time not to notice. No entrance for The Union Jacks, who have a new gimmick and really could have used the time to get the act over. The Union Jacks make quick tags and assault Titus for awhile. I really do love their team work. Slater ends up being the one to lock in the headlock and begin the wear down process of Titus. The crowd is noticeably not very into this. Titus finally makes it to his corner and Truth tags in. The crowd is pretty in to him. He hits his typical offense including, kicks and facebusters, All six men end up in the ring. Things break down before Truth plants Slater with his finish for the win.

Way too short. There was no time to get the crowd invested like they could have done. Jeez, right after I put over the tag division in the last tag team write-up. We’re moving through the midcard stuff in a hurry tonight.

OFFICIAL RESULT: The PTPs and R-Truth @ 3.45 via submission
RATING: *1/2

-Commercial Break-

– It’s time for some arm wrestling, folks. Cole is in the ring. He takes us back to the footage of ADR attacking Cena’s arm on Monday. Here comes Del Rio. He’s the best Mexican man in history. He’s proud of his family and what he did to Cena. Cheap heat heel promo tonight. ADR cannot say the word “series” to save his life. He calls out Cena. Cena comes. Cena gets booed. He acknowledges it because he’s like, really cool, and self-depreciating and like, just really down to Earth. You know? John Cena makes fun of a skinny guy dressed as superman in the front row. They either timed a canned pop wrong or the crowd is popping for one of themselves. Cena’s voice is annoyingly hoarse. The crowd is chanting YES for the arm wrestling match. I wish I shared their enthusiasm for this segment. Cena beats ADR immediately at arm wrestling. ADR wants a rematch. Good shit. The crowd chants lets go Cena. Right before they go at it again, Cena gets up and You Can’t See Me’s ADR. But then he does sit down and do it again. Cena wins again and… no. NO. NO!! ADR cheap shots him and attacks him! This is really out of character for him so I don’t blame Cena for not seeing it coming. ADR tries taking the good arm from Cena and inuring it with a chair. Cena fights back and then eats a spinebuster through the table. If ADR was intent on injuring Cena’s other arm, he should have done it after the spinebuster. Ya know? Boring segment.

-Commercial Break-

The Funkadactyls vs. The Bella Twins Nikki and Cameron start off. Nikki hits a few impressive manuevers to start. She’s becoming very physical with strong power moves. She lifts up Cameron and does squats with her. She charges at Cameron but eats a boot to the face. In comes Naomi. In comes Brie. She tears it up and heads to the top rope. She hits a dropkick and covers for two. Naomi hits her assisted jaw breaker that doesn’t look very good most of the time. She hits the rear view and covers for three.

This wasn’t very good. The moves were kind of loose and the crowd didn’t care. The lack of face/heel dynamic with the Total Divas roster is a little bit of a hurdle to jump in feudless matches. Natalya did just fine in terms of crowd response against a defined heel in Tamina earlier in the evening. The Funkadactyls just don’t impress me very much. I get their athleticism and potential but the basic psychology of a wrestling match still seems to be lost on them.

OFFICIAL RESULT The Funkadactyls @ 2:58 via pinfall
RATING: 1/2*

-Commercial Break-

The Great Khali vs. Camacho and Hunico After a very solid showing on Main Event last week, Camacho and Hunico are stuck in a 2v1 squash with Khali? Why not bring in locals for this? Tag rules intact. Khali just kind of puts his arm out and lets them do their thing, with the running into clotheslines and shit. Khali lifts Hunico up and drops him with a really dangerous looking drop. No protection on that one. He didn’t want to bend at all. Pin with foot. Collect money. Leave. Popped a Khali, I’m sweating.

Why? There’s so many short segments on this show. Khali didn’t need to be out there, let alone squashing a team that could really benefit the tag division down the line. Pointless segment.

OFFICIAL RESULT The Great Khali @ 1:40 via pinfall
RATING: SQUASH

– More Big Show/Orton feud footage. I think it’s safe to say that Show is the most featured wrestler in Smackdown video packages.

-Commercial Break-

The Beard and The Best vs. Curtis Axel and Ryback Punk starts with Axel. Punk quickly takes control and tags in Bryan. Bryan delivers a running knee to the mid-section of Axel. He locks in an arm wringer and Axel rakes the eyes to escape and tag in Ryback. Ryback and Axel are two of the most boring heels on the roster as far as offense goes so Punk and Bryan are pretty much ideal opponents here. Punk and Bryan deliver a double dropkick and Punk covers for two. Punk ducks a couple clothesline and goes for a running crossbody. He’s caught and dropped with a body slam. In comes Axel. Headlock tiiiiime. I typed that before the headlock. Aren’t I smarky, quirky, funny, and a cool? Punk fights out and delivers double running knees and a clothesline. He goes upstairs for an elbow and Ryback pulls Axel to the outside. Bryan and Punk both dive through the ropes and take them out before break.

-Commercial Break-

We return from break as the heels pick apart Punk. Meanwhile, I still have Harpers yeah’s in my head. Snapmare neckbreaker by a tagged in Axel for two. Punk rolls up Axel out of nowhere for two. Axel takes him down with a clothesline for two. Axel goes for a headlock in the lames attempt I’ve ever seen. He was really telegraphing the teamwork of wrestling as he seemed a little confused and on the same page with Punk as he locked it in. Axel knocks D-Bry to the mat and dropkicks Punk. Back to the headlock. The audience is clapping. The claps did not help Punk. Two months ago, Bryan was the most over guy on the roster. Today, Punk seems to out-pop Bryan. Punk crawls to Bryan at one .00001 mph. Bryan’s tagged in. The D-Bry comeback sequence commences as he cleans house. Nobody will complain about the Bryan comeback formula. I mean, he does do the same shit every time he tags in. I’m not complaining. Axel breaks up a near fall after yes kicks. He hits Ryback instead of Bryan on legit non-kayfabe accident and looks like a moron. Ryback catches Bryan after a flying goat attempt but Bryan gets him in the Yes Lock. Ryback is about to take. LIGHTS OUT.

This was a pretty good match that would have gone above the *** level had they been booked to deliver the finish they were building to. I maintain that Ryback and Axel have two of the most boring heel move sets on the roster right now, but that was no big deal for Punk and Bryan. The post-match angle was highly entertaining and closed the show well enough.

OFFICIAL RESULT No Contest @ around 9:00 aired
RATING: **1/2

The lights turn on and Rowan and Harper are in the ring alone! Bryan and Punk are gone and the crowd chants yes! Ryback shoves Axel for no good reason and he runs into Rowan. Rowan and Harper do not approve. Bray yells no mercy at them and they ambush Axel! Ryback gets up after they dispose of Axel and Ryback eats a big boot to the face. Now they pick Ryback apart. Bray is still outside the ring. They toss Ryback and look for Bryan and Punk. The Beard with the Best eventually come out from hiding under the ring and attack for a moment before retreating. Good closing to the show.

OVERALL: This was a solid Smackdown. The Khali vs. Camacho and Hunico squash was borderline offensive but beyond that, the good was long and the bad was short. They’re doing a good job building up Survivor Series and I’m genuinely excited to see the final card. The Wyatt Family vs. Punk and Bryan continues to carry the blue show along with the rest of the tag division. The Wyatt Family stands out as one of the most developed and interesting piece of WWE programming and they’re being featured prominently as a result. Taking the focus of Bray’s singles matches and onto Harper and Rowan is exactly what the act needed to take it to the next level. They’ve closed both of the big TV shows this week and I’m interested in seeing where they go from here. Until next time…

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