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411’s WWE RAW Report 3.31.14

March 31, 2014 | Posted by Tony Acero

Keep refreshing the page for the latest results!

Championship Roll Call:
Undisputed WWE World Champion: Randy Orton
US Champion: Dean Ambrose
IC Champion: Big E. Langston
Unified Diva’s Champion: AJ Lee
WWE World Tag Team Champions: The Usos


WWE Raw Pre-Show (From The WWE Network)

  • Welcome!
  • Josh Matthews, Alex Riley, Booker T and Bad News Barrett are the panel for the week. Barrett says there is good news for once, because there is someone on the panel that will make sense. Roddy Piper will appear on Raw tonight with a special edition of Piper’s Pit. The Undertaker appears to deliver a final message to Brock Lesnar. Also, Randy Orton faces Batista.
  • We get highlight from last week’s show, where Stephanie slapped Batista.
  • Renee Young talks with Randy Orton about tonight’s match with Batista. He thinks some have forgotten about him, but tonight’s Batista will serve as a reminder that he is dangerous.
  • Alex Riley is acting more over the top than in previous weeks, this is not a good thing. Booker T says that Orton and Batista is all about a fight tonight, settling an old score. Barrett says that he knows from experience that Orton is dangerous when backed into a corner.
  • We get a video package for the Taker vs. Lesnar match, and the fact that Taker has owned Lesnar the entire build. The panel breaks down the match, and the chances that Lesnar has to end the streak.
  • Sounds like Los Matadores vs. the Real Americans on Main Event is being taped..
  • Jerry Lawler talks to fans about tonight’s show and WrestleMania.
  • Kane will face a member of the Shield tonight on Raw.
  • Matthews hypes some of the WrestleMania related content on the Network this week in preparation for the big show.
  • Talk turns to the Wyatt vs. Cena feud, and the fact that Wyatt may be in Cena’s head. WrestleMania season video packages tonight kids. Riley says Wyatt has been in Cena’s head, but Cena delivers on the big stages, but Wyatt hasn’t been on the stage as of yet. Booker comments on Cena being a man’s man who has built his legacy, while Riley adds that he will fight to keep it. Barrett notes that he and Cena have never seen eye to eye, and he doesn’t fancy his chances against Wyatt.
  • We get clips of Hulk Hogan’s interview with Michael Cole last week.
  • They then discuss the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal and Riley annoyingly keeps saying “Big Show” “Big Show” “Big Show” for his pick to win. Chill dude.
  • Booker T picks Big E, and then Brad Maddox appears. Maddox announces that he has a major announcement for the battle royal, himself. Riley, Barrett and Booker T are not impressed.
  • Booker is now happy, because he wants to see Maddox get the hell beat out of him. Riley makes GI BRO jokes.
  • The panel delivers final hype for the show.

    411’s WWE Monday Night Raw Report 3.31.14

    We start with a BANG! DONG, as the music of The Undertaker hits and the chills transpire! Everyone is on their feet for the presence of The Deadman, and Tony is back! Now that he’s making his entrance, I have time to grab some Dew!

    Cole calls Taker vintage, and I’m not sure if it’s a jab, while we get a recap of what happened last Monday. Taker trips up a bit on the steps, but he’s dead so it doesn’t hurt him. He says that 21 men have stepped up and all of them have been set down (I guess Nathan Jones doesn’t count, Triple H, Kane, and Shawny boy are a bit more than one person). He doesn’t claim to be better than his victims, but at the showcase of Immortals, he will go further than anyone else which is why the streak stays alive. He’s sure Brock is thinking, “How am I going to break the streak?” What he should be thinking, however, is what’s going to happen when Taker takes him out into the deep water, where he can no longer touch the bottom…WHATCHA GONNA DO, BROCK? Wait…what?

    He wants to know if Brock will try and take him down to the bottom with him or try to swim back to shore. He says that not one of the peeps he’s beat has made it to the shore. He knows that Brock is a very dangerous man, and that there are many who think that Taker’s time will come. It’s inevitable that The Streak will be broken…now wait just a damned minute, Taker.

    There are many more that beleive in three things that can’t be beat: Death, Taxes, and The Streak. Ha! The Deadman speaks on taxes! REST IN…..

    The music of Brock hits, and here comes Paul E and Brock L. Heyman doesn’t mean any disrespect, but his client damned sure does. Brock has taken the position that this is not a match that Brock MUST win; this is a match The Undertaker MUST not lose. Taker can beat on Brock with a demon’s fury until Hell freezes over, but it will only take one moment; one F-5, and three seconds later, the streak is over. Long CM Punk chant finally fades away. He says that Brock beating Taker will be akin to Hogan defeated Andre. That’s not a prediction, that’s a SPOILER! Damnit, Heyman! Way to warn a brother….

    Brock looks to walk away, but thinks twice about it. He stares down Taker and makes his way down the ramp. Taker removes his cowl like he’s Bruce Wayne in front of Selina kyle and gets ready for a fight. Brock stops at the end of the ramp, looks up at the eyes of the old man, and backs away, pointing at Sting in the rafters….what, you saw the meme!

    The sweat that sits atop Brock’s lip coerces Brock to move forward again, as he gets towards the apron and looks to jump. He smirks, and we’re getting played here. Brock opts to circle the ring instead. They head towards the announce booth….then back towards the bottom of the ramp. Heyman runs in with a chair, Taker looks to attack, and Brock tries to attack. Reverse whip, and Brock hits a hard clothesline. Brock sets up for the F-5. He hits it! It’s like, the BIGGEST DEAL EVER to Michael Cole. Brock leaves while JBL expresses his newly convinced manner of Taker losing.

    -Commercial Break-

    So there’s a buncha shit goin down on The Network this week. Check it out, or the WWE will kill you.

    We’re back, and if you missed what just happened, scroll up and read.

    Did they change Big E’s music again?

    Match 1: Big E vs Alberto Del Rio

    Del Rio with the right hands, a headbutt and some more rights. He hits the ropes, but Big E drops then leap frogs over. He drops Del Rio and pins for 1 then gets him in the corner for some right hands to the gut. Whip into the corner and a shoulder into the mid section, then a pin for 1..nope. Big E with a press to Del Rio. He drops him like nothin then goes for a shoulder in the corner. Del Rio moves, and Big E hits the post. Del Rio grabs the left arm and pulls it against the post then steps on the hand of Big E as it rests on the steps. Big E may have broken a nail as we go to break.

    We are back, and Del Rio has the left arm locked up. Big E elbows out and hits a suplex. Big E tries to get some blood flow back into the left arm, then runs…right into an elbow. Del Rio grabs the arm, and locks in the cross armbreaker ON THE ROPES till three! Del Rio grins as the crowd boos. Del Rio hops up to the top rope, flies…and is caught! Backbreaker to Del Rio! Big E made that look easy. Clothesline from Big E. Another. Ducks a clothesline. Belly to Belly from Big E! Big Splash from Big E, but Del Rio has the knees up!! Del Rio in the corner. The crowd chants SI. Del Rio goes for a kick, misses, and runs into the arms of Big E. Big E sends him up and lets him drop, then covers for 1…2..NO! Big E grabs the head, sets up for a body slam, but Del Rio floats over and hits a backstabber. Pin for 1…2..NO! Del Rio calls for the cross armbreaker, goes for it, but gets setnt up and over! Big E goes for the splash again, and hits it this time. Pin for 1…2..NO! STRAPS ARE DOWN!!! Divorce court from Del Rio, out of nowhere! He locks the arm! Del Rio with a Cross Armbreaker, but Big E turns and tries to power out. Del Rio with rights! Big E falls. He tries to stand, gets it, lifts Del Rio! Powerslam down! Pin for 1…2….DEL RIO GRABS THE ROPES!!!

    Big E grabs the legs of Del Rio and drags Del Rio back into the ring. Big E sets Del Rio up on the top rope. He’s looking for a superplex, but Del Rio slaps him down.
    Big E is horizontal on the second ropes, so Del Rio stomps the chest. Big E is on his knees. Del Rio with a superkick to the FAYSUH!!!! Pin for 1….2…3!!
    Official Result: Alberto Del Rio
    Fun, if not a bit cliche in terms of in-ring action. The result is only due to the attempt to make Del Rio matter for the Battle Royal
    RATING: **

    – One member of The Shield will be facing Kane tonight, and we get to choose which!

    – Randy Orton vs Batista is later tonight

    – Triple H will say Goodbye to the Yes Movement

    – Bray Wyatt is up next

    Talk about previewing

    -Commercial Break-

    We are brought back to RAW from last week where Cena and Harper had a pretty cool match, resulting in a sheep-mask wearing Cena locked up on the ropes like a sacrifice Kurt Angle could be proud of.

    Flash to present time, and Harper is whistling. Bray is hanging upside down. The world is waiting. Just like everything else, it craves change. It’s far too easy to be enamored with the garden and turn a blind eye to the landfills. Can’t just whisper to people anymore and expect them to understand and believe; you have to force them to watch. Does he have our attention now? haha

    She said he was a child born to lead, the one who will teach them the difference between diamonds and dust. She said he would change the world. They’re going to cry for Cena, they won’t understand…not at first. But in time, they will forget John, and he’ll be left with nothing. They’ll see him the same way that Wyatt does – as a monster. He’s got the whole world in his hands.

    King and Cole talk about Total Divas. Let’s focus on something much better…

    Vickie Guerrero is ringside for this match for some reason. We confirm that the match on Sunday will be a single-fall match

    Match 2: Summer Rae vs. Natalya

    Nattie attacks like a drunk girl at the club. The reg stops it long enough for Summer to pull Nattie into the corner face first and kick the back repeatedly. Clothesline from Summer. Pin for 1…2..NO! Summer with a cravat from behind. Nattie turns into it and hits an elbow, but Summer drops her hard. Summer does a jig and misses a leg drop. Nattie sends her face first into the mat, hits the ropes, runs up Summer’s back, dropkicks her face! Nice. Suplex to Summer from Nattie. She whips Summer, but gets slapped instead. Hard clothesline from Nattie, and a slap fro mNatie. Sumer runs, but Nattie grabs the legs and pulls Summer down. She looks for the Sharpshooter, but SUmmer is able to run out of the ring.
    Summer is on the apron. Nattie grabs Summer by the hair, but Summer is able to kick her in the face. Cover for 1…2…3!!
    Official Result:
    Nattie had a cool little spot, but this was relatively sloppy.
    RATING: *

    -Commercial Break-

    It’s time to play the game, guys. Guys….it’s time to play the game.

    Roberts announces The Authority with authority as Triple H and Triple D make their way down to the ring.

    Steph on the stick (giggity). She wants to give us all an opportunity to say farewell to the Yes Movement. Triple H says there’s no loyalty for this generation; they just really want to be a part of something. We don’t want to do anything, we just want to be a part of something, so we have a flavor of the day – something they can latch onto then we just move onto something else once it’s done. He has an example. One year ago, this time, the whole Fandango thing was “HUGE,” then “we” just threw it away and didn’t give a crap. He calls Fandango a solid B+ and says we don’t care, we just move on.

    Steph wants to ask a question. Who here wants to see Daniel Bryan tonight. Steph chants Yes, and it gets awkwardly sexual…Triple H says that the crowd will do anything they encourage them to do. Triple H wants us to understand that this movement is just a myth, a fallacy. We want to beleive that Bryan is an A+ player, but no matter how many times we come out and chant, it doesn’t make it true. He wants to give another example: it’s like all the people that think he has all the power and success because he married well. He’ll be the first to admit that he married spectacularly, but the reason he has the power is because of his dominance in the ring. He got to the top and stayed there because of his dominance; that is the fact. It didn’t matter what flavor of the week came by, or who was the one guy that was gonna be “the guy.” BORING CHANT.

    Triple H has video proof, with a voice-over from Stephanie McMahon. haha. We get a video with Booker T, Scott Steiner, RVD, Jeff Hardy, Goldberg, Mick Foley, Jericho, Kurt Angle, and show some “crippling” evidence of Triple H kicking their asses. hahahahahahahaha. Having Steph do the voice-over is actually a nice touch.

    Here’s the thing, says Triple H. He calls each of those guys great, hall of famers even, but they were just players in the game, and he IS The Game. He is The Game now more than ever. Since we have cried so much about it, he has decided that not only will he beat Daniel Bryan at Mania, he will also win the Undisputed WWE Heavyweight Championship. He is the most powerful man in the WWE.

    The music of Batista hits before Triple H can make it out of the ring. Who dresses this guy? He’s got a Georgetown jersey on over a t-shirt and a hat that screams douche.

    Batista loves this whole “Say goodbye to the Yes Movement” thing, it’s really cute, but he couldn’t help but notice that he wasn’t in Triple H’s video, and that’s beacause Triple H has never beaten him. Triple H says that this has been said before. H mentions the shirt, and says Batista be getting ready for the match against Orton? Batista says Triple H may not even beat Bryan, maybe he should be worrying about that. He figured out last week that Triple H is the brains of this operation, Steph is the brawn. Here comes orton….

    Orton tells Steph to wait before she smacks Batista again, because he wants to see this. On second thought, he wants her to leave Batista alone so that he can beat some respect into him. Steph and Trips knows he respects them. He understands that a Triple Threat is best for business, and knows that Triple H will be in the main event and he’d be honored. He must ask one more time, though, to reconsider being a part of the Triple Threat. HHH says no amount of ass kissing will get him out of it. Orton’s reign as the champ is coming to an end very soon. Unless, of course, Orton can become The Viper again. The reality of it is, if Orton’s The Viper then…HHH doesn’t even know if he could beat that guy. If you’re going to find The Viper, though, you better find him real soon because the match with him and Batista is NO DQ.

    -Commercial Break-

    Match 3: The Usos and Los Matadores vs The Real Americans and Rybaxel

    Ryback and one of the Usos to start. Lockup, and Ryback backs Uso into the corner. The ref breaks it up. Another lockup, and Ryback overpowers again. Ryback pushes, so Uso gets a chop, another, hops over Ryback, is caught, floats over, ducks a clothesline and hops over Ryback, allllllllllll ending in a chop to the chest. ANother. Uso licks the hand then hits one more. Ryback with a knee, but he gets arm dragged to the other side. One more drag and a lock. We get a tag from brother Uso and they get a double kick to the gut of Ryback. Pin for 1..but Ryback powers out. Ryback tags in Curtis Axel. Uso with a right to the chin. A chop to Axel. Tag to one of the Matadores, senton to Curtis and a tag to the other Matador. Rope work ends in a dropkick. Arm drag takedown from….son of a bitch, one of them dudes.

    Tag to Uso! Chop then a whip is reversed and Uso hits a right hand to the chest. Axel is brought to the corner and Uso gets a tag to Los Matadores who double team to get a dropkick and a pin for 1….2..NO! Tag to Uso and a hard right to the gut is hit on Axel. Axel hits a right hand and uickly tags in Cesaro. The crowd picks up. Hard right to Cesaro then a kick to the gut and an uppercut. Cesaro with a knee, then an uppercut of his own and a tag to Swagger. Swagger is in for a double knee then attacks with a toss to the corner, and another to the opposite side. Shit breaks down as Cesaro and Axel get sent over the top rope. Ryback runs in and gets tossed over to the ouside. One of the Matadores flies to hit Cesaro, one Uso flies to hit Ryback. The legal man is in and tags in an Uso who hits a crossbody on Swagger and pins for 1…2..NO! Swagger sends Uspo to the outside. He hops up on the apron, and Swagger knocks him off the apron again. Swagger leaves the ring as we get a commercial break.

    We’re back midpin on Cesaro, and he kicks out. Cesaro with a dropkick and a pin of his own for 1…2..NO! Cravat from Cesaro. Cesaro catches the flying Uso and hits a backbreaker with one hand. Pin for 1….2…NO! Cesaro works the arm and tags in Swagger. Jack sends Uso in the corner then tosses Cesaro into the corner then hits a clothesline and a pin for 1…2..NO! Tag to Ryback. He hits a clothesline then locks in a cravat from behind. We get a Dudley Dog- like move, sending Ryback t othe mat. Tag to Axel, and he flies in, knocking both Matadores off the apron. Tag to Uso! He atacks, hits the ocrner, ducks a clothesline and hits a spinning back elbow. Kick to the gut of Axel, but Axel is here to reverse a whip, only to get hit with a SAMOAN DROP!! Butt splash in the corner! Pin for 1…2…NO! Ryback breaks it up. He gets a Superkick for his troubles! Axel fgrom behind with a roll up for 1…2..NO! Swagger with a blind tag. Superkick from Uso and he runs right into a BIG BOOT. Pin for 1…2…NO! Broken up, but here is Cesaro, who goes for an airplane spin, and is met with a hurrican rana. One of the Matadores flips off the apron with a moonsault, and horribly undercuts it. Luckily, Cesaro catches him. Swagger in the ring goes for the pAtriot lock, but he gets kicked for his trouble. One of the Matadores flies off the top rope, but Swagger grabs the leg and locks in the Patriot Lock. Here’s the Uso to distract, but Swagger body slams him down!

    Los Matadores think they are the Bellas, and do some Twin Magic. Rollup on Swagger and a pin for 1…2…NO!
    Official Result: Los Matadores and The Usos
    Maybe i should know who is who, but not knowing took me out of the match. There was alot they tried to do right here, but it came off as boring and slow, with a lot of mistakes. The good news is the crowd was really into it.
    RATING: **

    -Commercial Break-

    We’re back with Fandango!

    Match 4: The Rhodes Brothers vs Fandango and Damien Sandow

    I had to refill my cup, so I missed bout 20 seconds. Sandow enters the ring and tags in Fandango. Hip toss fro mCody onto Fandango, but Fandango trips him up and kicks him in the head. Fandango with a hard whip into the corner to Cody, chest first. Fandango gets blind tagged by Sandow. Sandow with aheadbutt and some stomps to Cody. Sandow with a roll on the mat and a pin for 1. Tag to Fandango. Fanny with a right to the head followed by a suplex to Cody. Pin for 1…..2NO! Fandango with a tag to Sandow. Sandow drops a knee on the face of COdy. Pin for 1….2..NO! Cravat from behind. Elbows from Cody. Right hand to the head. He goes for a tag, but drop toe-hold from Sandow sends Cody to the ground. Cody gets a quick tag to Goldy! Clothesline! Another! Whip and a duck, so Goldust hits an uppercut. Spinebuster by Goldust. Fandango flies off, but Goldy with an inverted atomic drop! Crossbody off the tope rope to both men! SCOOP slam to Sandow! Pin for 1…Fandango breaks it up. Cody with a dropkick of the ropes then he flies off the apron onto Fandango.
    In the ring, Final Cut to Sandow and a pin for 1…2…3!!
    Official Result: The Rhodes Brothers
    Average match. Is something off tonight?
    RATING: **

    Backstage, The Shield is chillin. Rollin says he almost feels bad for Kane. It doesn’t matter who wins the app vote, Kane is in a bad way. If his little geriatric side kicks want to get involved, they’ll find out why we call this *his fist* the new symbol of excellence. Ambrose says they never disrespected Kane or the NAO, it was the other way around. They will teach them the definition of attitude. Reigns says The Shield is not to be messed with. Beleeee Dat.

    The Wyatts are here.

    Match 5: R-Truth vs Bray Wyatt

    Lockup to start, Wyatt hits a clothesline. Kick to the fallen Truth. Wyatt lifts up Truth and hits a headbutt then sends TRuth into the corner and hits a right. He clasps the head then gets kicked, but fires back with rights. Wyatt whips Truth into the corner, but Truth hops over and flips back. He ducks a clorhesline and hits a heel kick and pins for 1. Truth with a hard body press in the corner, ducks a clothesline, but Wyatt with a cross body into the midsection of Truth. Wyatt with a headbutt. Wyatt with a headbutt. Wyatt steps on the back of Truth, then drops his ass on the back and pulls the face back. Wyatt with a knee then he sends Truth to the outside. Truth hurriedly heads back in the ring, and Wyatt is in to beat down on the back of his head with some elbows. Wyatt lifts up Truth then hits an interesting chest to the knee hold/drop. Nice. Wyatt lifts Truth up and hits an uppercut. Truth tries to fight back, but Wyatt is too much. He attacks, hits the apron, and flies back with a hard clothesline in the corner.
    Wyatt hangs upside down, looks for Sister Abigaul, sets up for it. Kiss. Death. Boom! Pin for 1…2…3!!
    Official Result: Bray Wyatt
    Good showing from Bray, who popped out a new move (was that new?). Truthe sold well for him.
    RATING: **1/2

    Xavier Wood checks on Truth, so the Wyatts attack, and send him to the outside. Wyatt drops to his knees, the lights go out. Follow Dem Buzzzards.

    From behind the Wyatts, a fourth person is standing with a sheep mask on. He looks creepily at Harper, then Rowan. He stares at Bray, removes the mask. It’s John Cena. He attacks Harper, AA to ROwan!!! He sets up Wyatt for one, but Bray escapes!! He rolls out of the ring. John stands in his Michael Myers jump suit and screams that he wants Wyatt. Wyatt sits on the ramp as Rowan and Harper stand behind him. Wyatt sings a bit. Cena has a headband and wristbands somewhere, and puts one on to take it off and throw it….alright.

    Pretty cool, Cena….pretty cool.

    -Commercial Break-

    Just cuz….

    WWE Rewind is the announcement of the VG Invitational. We come to the lovel AJ in the middle of the ring, whispering my name to herself.

    Match 6: Lumberjack Match
    AJ Lee vs Naomi

    Lockup to start. Naomi works the arm. She pulls hard, but AJ is able to get out of it and drop Naomi down. AJ talks shit to all the Divas, allowing Naomi to dropkick her to the outside. SOme Divas send her in. AJ rolls out, but a few girls roll her back in. Naomi with a rollup for 1…2..NO! Naomi with a whip. Reversed. Naomi stops herself on the apron. AJ dropkicks her to the mat, but no one attacks Naomi. Cole calls her “aghast” haha. AJ says “I’ll do it for you, like I always do” and heads out to send Naomi in the ring. Nattie sends her in as well. AJ floats over and tries to pull the hair, but AJ pushes. She ducks a high kick and hits one of her own. Pins for 1…2..NO! AJ sends Naomi headfirst into the corner. Kicks to the gut send Naomi into a seated position. AJ kicks off the ropes to help lock in a front faced hold and scissors lock. Naomi is fading. They are in the middle of the ring. Naomi falls to one knee. She stands and breaks the scissors, but AJ hits a knee then a neckbreaker. AJ with a pin for 1….kickout! AJ yells and is met with an enziguri. Dropkick from Naomi into a Full-Nelson slam…AJ spread th….jesus. Pin at 1…2..NO! Naomi drags AJ to the corner, goes for the split-leg, but AJ rolls out.
    The Divas attack, but Tamina helps. ALL the Divas attack Tamina AND AJ. They send AJ back into the ring. Naomi with the Rear View. Pin for 1….2…3!!!
    Official Result: Naomi
    Mania is going to be a hell of a mess, but this wasn’t too bad.
    RATING: ****1/2

    -Commercial Break-

    We’re back, and Renee Young is chillin with John Cena. He says that desperate times call for desperate messages. Wyatt continues to spread his propaganda. Wyatt claims he will turn John Cena into a monster. As you just saw, though, a man can be forced to fight and on Sunday, we will see John Cena, and he will be a monster. Being a monster for a day will secure a legacy for a lifetime. Is he afraid, yes. But the greatest thing about fear is the moment you realize you have the courage to face it. Every superstar’s career has a beginning and an end; Wyatt isn’t his end. He says if we have shoes, we should run to New Orleans….Cena gets super Denzel on us, tells Wyatt he’s going to give him change and he will shove his foot up Wyatt’s ass.

    We are in the ring with The King who has no idea what he’s talking about. It hits him, and we get to see which member of The Shield will be facing kane. The winner is…..

    Match 7: Roman Reigns vs Kane

    Lockup! Kane gets the upperhand but only for a second, as Reigns hits a headbutt, the corner, then runs….RIGHT INTO A BIG FUCKIN BOOT!! Kane atacks the back then hits a hard right and an uppercut. Right hand to the face. Kane is bein brutal. Forearm to the back. Whip into a back elbow from Kane! Kane covers for 1. Kane with a splash in the corner. Sidewalk slam. Kane calls for the chokeslam already. Reigns blocks the chokeslam! He kicks, hits the ropes, ducks a clothesline and hits a hard one of his own He flies into the corner with a clothesline then hits a right, droppking Kane to his knees. Hard right to the face. Kane hangs atop the bottom rope. Reigns heads to the outside. Kick to the face of Kane! Reigns in the ring. He calls for the Superman punch. He cocks it.

    The New Age Outlaws make their way out! But form behind, Rollins and Ambrose atack the Outlaws!! Reigns turns, ducks a clothesline, hits the SUperman Punch!
    Ambrose and Rollins enter the ring. They surround Kane. Attack from all three gets them DQ’d
    Official Result: Kane via DQ
    Short and sweet
    RATING: **

    The New Age Outlaws try to interfere, but get kicked out. They pull Kane out of the ring and save him from a three-man powerbomb.

    -Commercial Break-

    We’re back, and Roddy is in the middle of the ring!! His wrist is lacking any Sharpie from what I can see. He mentions the first Mania and his presence in it. He wants to make sure we all know, it wasn’t he who was pinned in the middle of the ring. There was a man, however, who played a huge role in making Mania as big a deal as it is now. He is the 8th Wonder of the World, Andre the Giant. This Sunday, 30 superstars will have their Mania Moment and a chance to link their names to one of the greatest legends in the history of professional wrestling. If you ask him who he thinks the favorite is…..he’s really…

    AWWWWWWWESOME! Roddy is upset. They have a “Really” off. Miz says that he is the favorite to win the Battle Royal, because unlike Piper and Andre the Giant, Miz has actually won the main event of Mania. Those 29 other Superstars don’t compare to The Miz, just like Piper’s Pit doesn’t compare to Miz TV.

    SHEAMUS IS HERE! Piper is upset about this, too. haha. Sheamus calls Miz stupid. He says Miz isn’t fit to hold Roddy’s kilt. In regards to the Andre the Giant Battle Royal, Brother match….Sheamus sees him winning…

    TITUS O’NEIL is here to blow the whistle. He says HOL UP and says if anyone is going to win the Andre the Giant Battle Royal, Brother match, it’s Titus. Roddy sends Titus to the side, so Titus barks.

    DOLPH ZIGGLER is next. He says he hates to come out and steal the spotlight, but that’s totally his thing and that’s exactly what he’ll do this Sunday when – not only does he eliminate everyone – he will etch his name in sports entertainment history. Piper tells Miz, Sheamus, Titus and Dolph that he’s been around long enough to know what’s going on. He tells Miz he’s a nice kid, then thumb to the eye. Sheamus attacks. Miz and Titus attack each other for no reason. Other members of the Battle Royal come down to join in on the fun. ROddy is on the apron as the music of Rey Mysterio hits. He flies in, gets kicked by Dolph, then kicks him in the head. Rey and Sin Cara attack one another. Rey up top. Hurricanrana to Sin Cara. Rey with the 619 as Sheamus Brogue kicks someone, then Brogue kicks Sin Cara.

    The music of The Big Show hits, and he heads down the ramp, licking his chops. He heads in the ring, and everyone attacks Show. Show breaks them all off, chokeslams Darren Young, clothesline to Titus, chop to Kofi, faceplant to Heath, and a KN Punch. Zack Ryder and Dolph fly right into his hands and we get a double chokeslam. Rey stands alone. He gets on his knees to beg for mercy from Show. Show turns, and Rey 619’s Big Show! haha. He flies off the apron, so Show catches him. Show presses Rey above him and tosses Rey atop all the other superstars, leaving The Big Show standing alone in the middle of the ring…untl Piper enters to hold the man’s hand up.

    That was kind of messy….

    -Commercial Break-

    Before the Main Event starts, Triple H and Steph make their way out. It appears they’ll be ringside with the boys during the match.

    Match 8: No Disqualification Match
    Randy Orton vs Batista

    Orton starts with a kick and attacks the back, then sends Batista shoulder first into the post. Orton leaves the ring and sends Batista headirst into the apron. Batista stirs by the ramp. Orton sends Batista into the barricade, but Batista fires back with a clothesline to Orton. Batista tosses Orton onto the barricade this time. Batista sends Orton in the ring and heads atop the apron. Orton with a kick to the chest of Batista then some stomps, sending Batista to the outside. Orton follows and sends Batista – no, Batista fights back with a right hand. Orton is able to reverse a whip into the barricade. Orton clotheslines Batista over the barricade into the audience. Batista grabs a chair, though! Batista attacks with the chair!! Orton is able to stop it, though, and sends Batista spine first into the barricade. Orton has the chair and attacks the back of Batista. Orton holds up the chair to the crowd, as they boo. Batista is back in the ring. Orton tries to use the announce table, but Batista is outside to grab him. He sends Orton face first into the table. Triple H yells at him to “Show me the Animal.” Batista sends Orton into the barricade back first the ngrabs another chair. Batista goes for a chair shot, but Orton has a kendo stick, and he attacks viciously! He gets in a few good swings, goes for a whip, but it’s reversed by Batista and Orton hits the steps shoulder first!!

    Batista sends Orton into the ring and follows him inside. Spinebuster from Batista!! He grabs the ropes! Thumbs down! Batista sets up for a Batista bomb, but Orton gets out and hits the backbreaker. Orton stalks Batista, who rolls to the apron, setting up nicely for the rope-assisted DDT. Orton hits it! Orton wants the RKO! Tripel H is cut off randomly. We cut to the announce table. DANIEL BRYAN IS ATTACKING TRIPLE H!!!!

    Official Result: NO CONTEST

    RATING: **1/2

    Orton leaves the ring to grab Bryan! He does, and sends him into the steel steps shoulder first. Stephanie McMahon goes to check on Triple H. Orton grabs Daniel Bryan and sends him in the middle of the ring. Orton slides into the ring and stands. SPEAR from Batista!! He goes after Bryan! Bryan with a kick! FLYING KNEE!!! Bryan sees Triple H. Suicide Dive to the outside onto Triple H!!! Bryan attacks Triple H with kicks and rights! Triple H tries to fight back! Bryan is mauling Triple H all around the ring! BRYAN WITH THE KENDO STICK!!! Bryan attacks Triple H!! Triple H in the ring, and out, then heads up the ramp! Orton on the apron! Bryan kicks him off, then watches as Triple H makes his way up the ramp! Bryan stands tall atop the turnbuckle! YES! YES! YES! YES!

    END SHOW

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    Tony Acero

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