The Smackdown Breakdown 04.28.06
Posted by J.D. Dunn on 04.28.2006
O Henry!
As great as it is that KOTR matches are getting so long time wise, they've just made it SOOOO obvious that Booker/Lashley will be the finals and that is killing the enjoyment of the tournament for me. First Booker and Lashley have an altercation before the tourney starts and theyre on opposite ends of the bracketts. Then JBL and Angle have an in ring altercation which even my mom could see leads to JBL costing Angle his match with Booker, which sends Booker to the finals.
What I would love to see is Benoit vs. Angle in the finals (DUH), but with a plan. Rey and Benoit were friends especially in the whole Eddie Guerrero memory angle, but now Angle and Rey are buddy-buddy. In the KOTR ring finals with the winner getting a title shot at Rey Benoit can cheat to win by using the ropes or a low blow, and Rey could be angry with him leading to a much needed Benoit heel turn where he challenges Rey for the World Title and Angle feuds with JBL over the US Title.
Well, they seemed to sufficiently muddy the waters by bringing Gunnar Scott into the equation tonight, so it could still go either way. I just wish they'd drop the whole "good guy" has to meet "bad guy" routine. I thought we got rid of that mindset 10 years ago.
WWE Smackdown — 04.28.06
From London, England.
Your hosts are Michael Cole and Tazz.
U.S. Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. William Regal
Bradshaw calls the United States championship the best title because it's named after the world's only superpower. He makes fun of them for bowing to the Queen and asks them to chant "U.S.A.." William Regal interrupts to a big pop, looking like a total badass (despite the robe). Regal spews out a series of epithets toward Americans. Ha ha! Give 'em hell, William. Hey! Wait a minute! Regal knocks JBL down with the power of the punch and hits a backdrop. He knocks JBL to the floor with a series of forearms, and we go to break. We come back to JBL hitting a big boot to turn the tide. Tazz theorizes Regal's eardrum might have been busted because Regal starts staggering around. JBL slaps on a sleeper. Regal ducks a clothesline but charges into a boot. JBL goes for the Clothesline from Hell, but Regal hits an Exploder! ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Regal slaps on the STF, but JBL makes the ropes. JBL goes to the eyes to disorient Regal and ends him with the Clothesline from Hell at 10:52. I wouldn't mind seeing these two go at it Strong Style for about 20 minutes. ***1/4
Booker T gives Kristal some interview time. Gunnar Scott interrupts and introduces himself to Booker as the guy who beat him a few days ago. Booker says he'll get revenge…just not tonight because he's got a mucus membrane problem. Instead, he'll pick a substitute. Booker takes more sick days Natalie. Natalie being this girl I used to work with that took a lot of sick days and then we found out she wasn't really sick, she was just lazy, and then child protective services took her kids away from her because she spent her sick days getting high.
Angle Title Flashback: Some judicious editing makes it look like Angle defeated the Rock cleanly.
Next week: Tatanka's initiation begins (or maybe he'll be initiating someone). I hope he wrestles three ninjas.
MNM & Gregory Helms (w/Melina) vs. Paul London, Brian Kendrick & Super Crazy
If you're a big Paul London fan, be sure to find Ring of Honor's "The Epic Encounter," if only to see one of the funniest promos in the history of wrestling on AJ Styles, Mickie James & Amazing Red. The heels attack, but the faces clean house. London and Kendrick hit stereo topes. Crazy hits a plancha on Helms. Kendrick goes up, but Melina crotches him. MNM goes to work on him for a spell. He eventually gets the hot tag after virtually nothing of note. The faces clean house again, and London finishes Helms with a small package at 3:58. Melina berates her guys for coming out on the losing end yet again. Too short to be worth anything. How can you get into Kendrick's face-in-peril act when it's only 120 seconds? *
In the back, Melina is still sick of her boys. She yanks the mirror right out of Jillian Hall's hands and asks for a freshen up. Jillian tosses make-up in her face, triggering a catfight. IT'S MAYHEM AT THE MAKE-UP TABLE! MASCARAMANIA IS RUNNING WILLLLLLLLLLLD!
King of the Ring: Bobby Lashley vs. Mark Henry.
Lots of jawjackery to start, and they test strength. Henry wins that one pretty handily. Lashley fares better slugging it out but gets suckered into an avalanche from Henry. Lashley comes back with a series of clotheslines and a bodyslam. Like an idiot, he goes for the Dominator, and Henry backdrops him over. Henry charges, but Lashley yanks the ropes down, sending Henry spilling over the top (well, in theory). Henry gets counted out for the cheap loss. It was a mildly entertaining power match until the botched and cheap ending. Henry attacks Lashley after the loss and avalanches him against the ringpost. Despite Henry's actions against the Undertaker and Kurt Angle, Michael Cole is still somehow incredulous at his actions. 3/4*
Rey Mysterio stops to talk to Kristal. She asks what it's like to be constantly asked when he's going to drop the title and then asks him if he's going to drop the title tonight. Rey, ever the confident athlete, says he doesn't know. He's just happy to be there.
Angle Title Flashback: Angle picks up a win over Brock Lesnar and Big Show.
Gunnar Scott vs. Fit Finlay.
Booker and Sharmell are on commentary. Finlay dismantles the kid to start. Scott knocks him to the floor but gets caught with the old apron trick. Back in, Finlay continues his methodical dismantling of Scott as if he were some ultra-patient model ship builder and he had to dismantle one of those ships and reassemble it inside of a bottle. That's hard. Anyway, Scott catches him with a boot to the jaw and slingshots him to the floor. Finlay grabs the shillelagh and charges, but Finlay backdrops him over. Booker jumps up and thrust kicks Scott behind the ref's back. Finlay gets the win at 3:46, but he's not satisfied. Booker and Finlay put the boots to Scott, but Chris Benoit makes the save. So either Scott costs Booker the semi-final match, or JBL costs Angle the semi-final match. *
The Great Khali comes out for a word with Kristal. Daivari does the speaking for him, of course. Tazz says he's never seen the Undertaker beaten down like Khali did to him. Yeah, Tazz started watching wrestling in 1999. Daivari gloats that the Undertaker is broken and afraid. Khali tries to talk, prompting a mocking "What?" chant from the crowd.
Angle Title Flashback: Angle surprises everyone by showing up in the battle royal to crown a vacant champion and winning the whole thing.
World Heavyweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle.
Ominous sign: they haven't bothered to adjust the belt to fit Rey's waist. Then again, all the cool kids are wearing them saggy now. At least he's wearing it. Rey slips out of a fireman's carry but catches an uppercut to the jaw. Angle gives him a tilt-o-whirl backbreaker to a mixed reaction. Rey charges but gets belly-to-bellied over the top. We come back from break to Angle holding a chinlock. Rey elbows out but runs into a knee. Rey counters the Angleslam to a sunset flip, but Angle rolls through and grabs an Anklelock. Rey twists away, so Angle sunset flips him, but Rey rolls through this time and punts Angle in the head. Awesome! Rey comes back with a satellite headscissors and sets up for the 619. Angle cuts him off with a back elbow, though. Rey stays on top with the Wheelbarrow Bulldog for two. Rey runs into a belly-to-belly, but he counters the Angleslam to a Tornado DDT. Rey goes up, but Angle pops up and gives him a Super Belly-to-Belly suplex for two. Kurt goes back to the mid-section with a football sled drive. He backs up and gets a running start, but Rey moves. Kurt posts himself and falls to the floor in another sick spot. Rey drops the dime as Angle is getting back in the ring. ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! There's a large Angle contingent in the crowd tonight, so Rey gets a lot of boos. Angle recovers and gives Rey a release German Suplex that plants Rey on his face. Rey hits the 619, but Angle catches him in mid-air and locks in the Anklelock. Mark Henry shows up and attacks Angle to prevent anything interesting from happening. There's your DQ at 14:49. Henry avalanches Angle against the ringpost and splashes him through a table. Angle screams about his ribs as we go off the air. It was going fine until the end. ***1/4
Final Thoughts: Solid show again. I like the attempt to push multiple guys to the top of the card, but the result is a muddled title picture. The announcers speculated on Henry's motives as the show went off the air, so I guess we'll have the big mystery reveal. It's not like they were best friends before this or anything. And can we please get Rey one clean win before he drops the title? The good news is, with no Velocity, the WWE might be forced to make use of the Smackdown talent they have.
