The Velocity Wrap-Up 5.06.06
Posted by Dan Zurbruegg on 05.07.2006
Road Warrior defeats Paul Birchill with the use of a powerslam?
Steve Romero, alongside Josh Matthews, welcomes us to Velocity.
Opening Match: Paul Burchill w/Shelly vs. Road Warrior
Burchill comes out to a nice pop, and Shelly, his new manager, follows him to the ring. Josh Matthews calls her hot. Josh Matthews is an idiot. Animal gets no pop, and is introduced just as "Road Warrior". Warrior shoves Burchill into the corner to start. They trade slaps and then shoves. They lock up, and Warriors leads him into the corner once again. He delivers a few right hands, but Burchill fights back with a few lefts. Burchill comes off the hopes and hits a running axe handle to the chest of Animal, who rolls out of the ring. Animal gets back in the ring and goes after Burchill, but Paul nails a drop toe hold, and delivers a few blows to the arm. Burchill locks in an arm wrench, but Animal pushes him into the corner and hits a couple of knees to the gut. Burchill hits some left hands, but Animal sends him head first into the bottom turnbuckle. Warrior hits a clothesline, and Burchill unsuccessfully fights back and runs into the big boot. Animals chokes Burchill with the ropes and hits a scoop slam. Animal climbs onto the second rope and misses a terrible splash, as Burchill rolls away. Paul hits two left hands and flies off the ropes with a flying forearm. He hits another forearm, and then delivers an arm wrench into a clothesline. Burchill plays to the crowd, Irish whips Animal, and hits an elbow. He does a standing moonsault, which gets the first two count of the match. Burchill comes off the ropes for an elbow, but Animal reverses it into a powerslam for the win at 3:40?
Winner: Road Warrior Rating: *½ - Was an okay match, but it ended abruptly, with the wrong guy going over by the use of a powerslam. Chris Masters uses a powerslam every match and I can't even remember the last time he won.
- Advertisement for WWEShop.com is aired.
- Shown is the "The Rebirth of Tatanka" promo. And I'm supposed to care because…?
Bobby Lashley vs. T.J. Dalton
Lashley reverses a clothesline and throws Dalton onto the ropes to start the match. He hits a belly to belly suplex, and whips Dalton into the turnbuckle. Lashley charges, but Dalton reverses with a boot of the face. He attempts to clothesline Lashley, but Bobby hardly moves. Dalton comes off the ropes, but Lashley hits a military press, and then a spear. Lashley hits a delayed one-handed suplex, and then the Dominator for the victory at 1:26. Tatanka's promo lasted nearly twice as long as this match.
Winner: Bobby Lashley Rating: DUD, though ***** for me writing the review of the match in, like, two minutes.
- Promo for the Wreckless Intent CD is shown.
Gregory Helms vs. Mike Alteri
They start with a lock up, and Helms leads Alteri into the ropes. This Alteri guys is tiny, at least compared to Helms. The two lock up once again, though Helms hits a snapmare this time. Alteri kicks up and applies a wristlock, which Helms reverses into a headlock. Alteri gets sent into the ropes, Helms jumps over him, and Alteri hits a headscissors takedown, to the crowd's applause. Alteri with a school boy for a one count. Helms reverses an irish whip into one of his own, and Alteri comes off the ropes and delievers an arm drag. He charges towards Helms, who attempts to back body drop Alteri to the outside. Alteri lands on the apron and hits a shoulder to the gut of Helms. He flips over Gregory, and comes off the ropes with a cross body, which is reversed into a spinning backbreaker by Helms. Helms uses the ropes to choke Alteri, He sends Alteri into the ropes and hits an elbow. Gregory locks in a variation of the camel clutch. Alteri fights back, and attempts to run towards the ropes, but Helms uses the hair to slam him to the mat. Alteri sends Helms into the corner. Back in the middle of the ring, Alteri hits a few punches, gets sent into the ropes, and slides under Helms. He hops on Helms' back and hits the victory roll for a two count. Both men get to their feet, Helms misses a clothesline, and Alteri delivers a side heel kick for another two count. Helms gets sent into the corner, and Alteri jumps on him, but gets shoved off. Helms hits the Shining Wizard and the Final Cut for the pin at 3:37. Winner: Gregory Helms Rating: **¼ – Good stuff
- The air a promo of "See No Evil", which is apparently the "next horror blockbuster".
- Highlights of Mark Henry/Rey Mysterio is shown. Next week it's Mysterio vs. Khali.
Main Event: Orlando Jordan vs. Matt Hardy
They lock up, and Hardy quickly hits a school boy for a one count. Orlando locks in an arm wrench, but Hardy reverses it into one of his own. Orlando gets sent into the ropes, and Hardy hits a hip toss. Matt works on Jordan's left arm, with an elbow and more arm wrenches. Orlando fights back and throws Hardy into the corner, and then delivers some blows to the chest. Orlando and the referee argue, which gives Hardy just enough time to reverse Orlando, and send him into the ropes. Matt delivers multiple blows to the head, but Orlando comes back with a kick to the midsection. Orlando then throws Hardy under the bottom turnbuckle, and into the steel post. Both men leave the ring, but re-enter shortly thereafter. Jordan hits a sideslam for two. Hardy fights back with a couple of punches, and comes off the ropes, but Orlando uses the shoulder to knock him down for a two count. Orlando hits a backbreaker, and then applies an abdominal stretch. Hardy attempts to fight back, but gets slammed to the mat. Matt gets to his feet and reverses a scoop slam into a reverse DDT. The two trade punches, Orlando gets sent into the ropes, and Hardy hits a clothesline. Matt hits another clothesline, sends Jordan into the corner, and hits a bulldog for a two count. Hardy reverses a clothesline into the side effect, for another two count. He gets on the second rope and hits a diving elbow to the head of a standing Orlando Jordan. Hardy goes for the Twist of Fate, but gets pushed into the ropes, and Orlando hits a spinebuster for two. Orlando misses a double axe handle off the turnbuckle, and Hardy hits the Twist of Fate for the pin at 7:52.
Jordan goes for a double axe handle off the second turnbuckle but Hardy gets a kick to the gut and nails the Twist Of Fate for the victory!
Winner: Matt Hardy Rating: **½ - Great Velocity match. The first half dragged on a bit, but the last few minutes were solid.
Overall: Decent Velocity; Hardy/Jordan and Helms/Alteri were fun. Lashley/Dalton was a complete squash, though, and I don't see the point of Animal winning. There's nothing worth going out of your way for.
