411’s TNA Impact Report 8.03.06

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TNA Impact Begins…NOW!

We open with highlights of last week’s show.

JB is here and says Sting accepted Christian’s offer for him to be in his corner. JJ and Steiner are there. Steiner will be in JJ’s corner. JJ says this is a set up and he wants to find Cornette. Slick Johnson is here and says Cornette will be here and there will b a mandatory meeting this evening. Steiner threatens to try and get more info, but Slick is stupid, thus has no more info.

Tenay and West welcome us to the show.

Moody Jack announces the LAX via their personal entrance.

Konnan kicks out Tenay and West as he is taking over. Moody’s mic is on as well. Konnan demands water and cheese snacks, and who doesn’t, they are delicious.

LAX (Homicide and Hernandez) w/Konnan vs. Clark and Raynce

LAX starts to kick ass. Hernandez just tosses Raynce around, chops and Homicide back in. Hernandez gets the “border toss” on Clark. GRINGO KILLA on Raynce and that is all.

Winners: LAX @ 1:00 via

AJ and Daniels are on the screen. AJ has a neck brace on and isn’t cleared to wrestle. Daniels challenges Homicide for a match next week. He says it will end in a 187…bitch. Konnan says they make the bitches. Bottom line, they have no passion or hunger like LAX. They will stab and cripple them to get the titles.

Squash win for LAX is a good thing, the angle afterwards was also well done and a match is set for next week to add heat heading into the PPV.

JB is with Samoa Joe. Joe says they have issues, and Monty got into something he shouldn’t have. Joe says he is everything that Monty was supposed to be. Monty is jealous, just like the NFL he got to the big show and lost. He isn’t finished with Rhino, boys, he needs to add them to his legacy. 14-months he is undefeated, and after Hard Justice, they will know why.

JJ and Steiner attack Jay Lethal looking for Cage and Sting. Poor Lethal.

We get a video promo for Bobby Roode. Mitchell, Douglas, Diamond all discuss how he is the hot free agent and how they can lead him to greatness.

Shane Douglas is in the ring. AMW has always dominated TNA since day one and have always caused trouble for the Naturals. He intros them, they have slightly different music again. Douglas pep talks them and leaves as usual.

The Naturals vs. AMW w/Gail Kim

Harris and Chase to begin. Now all 4 in and they brawl. Naturals in control, double shoulder block to Storm. They work over Harris and cover for 2. Off the ropes and an arm bar on Harris, tag to Storm and they get a double team side slam/reverse DDT for 2. Russian leg sweep by Storm for 2. Storm almost hits Harris, and then does. And again! Chase rolls up Storm and that is all.

Winners: The Naturals @ 2:30 via pin

Way too short, but they got their point across, which is to push the Naturals and fuel the break up of AMW.

JJ and Steiner are out and beat down the Naturals. Catatonic by Harris on Chase. Steiner tosses them out ad JJ on the mic. He says if Cage won’t come to them they will come to him. They won’t leave the ring until he comes out. They head to a commercial.

Back from commercial and Larry Z and his toupee are here. He just got off the phone with Cornette. He is supposed to tell them some things. If they do not comply, you will be fired. Larry looks like Moe from the 3 Stooges. Steiner, Cornette demands that you meet face to face tonight. Cornette also demands that JJ leaves immediately. JJ throws a fit but AMW convinces him to leave.

West and Tenay talk.

Earlier this week, Tenay talked with Sting. They talk about Cornette and Sting says he is doing a good job. They talk about Cage and Steiner being ringside at Hard Justice. He wanted Cage there to watch his back to counter JJ. Cage humbled himself and he is gold in Sting’s book. Sting agrees that is he loses at Hard Justice he will have failed. He is on a quest. He would love to be champion but getting rid of JJ is his main goal. He can agree on one thing with JJ, there isn’t room for both of them in TNA.

We get a video promo on Senshi. He talks about the upcoming match and how the winner gets a shot at him. He dissects his opponents. Great promo.

X-Division #1 Contender’s Match for a shot at Senshi at Hard Justice: Jay Lethal vs. Sonjay Dutt vs. Petey Williams vs. Alex Shelley w/Devine vs. Frankie Kazarian

They all begin with brawling. RANA by Dutt. Head scissors on Kazarian. Dutt flies to the floor and gets a senton dive onto all 4-men! And it is commercial time.

Back from commercial and Petey and Dutt are in. Canadian Tree of Woe! Kick by Kazarian, tag to Alex. Kicks to Dutt and then he chokes him on the ropes. Slam by Alex, sling shot senton gets 2. Off the ropes, blind tag by Kazarian and a toss on Dutt gets 2. Facelock by Kazarian, Dutt fights out and gets some rights. He hypes up and levels Kazarian. Petey levels Dutt and gets the tilt a whirl Russian leg sweep, stopped and then they get a wild 5-man move. Diving head butt by Jay for 2. Cart wheel onto the dropkick. Diving head butt on Kazarian gets 2. Alex up top…eats a super kick by Dutt. Alex gets a reverse powerbomb, sweet. Front lung blower by Alex. He and Jay up top, tossed ad another diving head butt by Jay. CANADIAN DESTROYER on Jay and that is it!

Winner: Petey Williams @ 9:25 via pin

Fine X-Division match here. Nothing memorable, but a fun match. The commercial hurt it though.

JB in the back and he is outside. Cornete’s red jacket is here! He makes sure JJ is Gone and Steiner is here. Eric Young is here, and asks about his job. He promises a meeting next week! Cage comes out of the limo now. He likes Eric and says he knows the deal. He promises to talk to Cornette for him. Young is freaked he has to wait 7-days.

Company Meeting

Cornette says he thanks us for letting him do this. He has had the job for 6-weeks, and he doesn’t believe he should be on TV every 5-minutes getting in the way of wrestling. But some things are out of control. Reality check time. For Hard Justice, he is adding a tag match, Bentley and Kazarian vs. The James Gang vs. AMW vs. The Naturals. Winner gets a tag title shot. He also gives Runt his match with Abyss. Monty vs. Rhino vs. Joe in a falls count anywhere match. It will sell tickets baby. Since Kevin Nash isn’t here, next week Paparazzi productions with Nash will battle Lethal, Dutt and Sabin. Everyone is dismissed, except Cage and Steiner. Dismissed means to get the hell out of his building!

He called them here because he respects them as athletes. He isn’t a fan of them being at ringside. He knows the score, and doesn’t want JJ to retain. Next week, Cage vs. Steiner on Impact. He knows Cage wants to help Sting, he expects a brawl, and if one of them don’t make it to the PPV, so be it.

Steiner grabs the mic and agrees with Cornette. Next week, he will whoop Cage. Cage is too small and from Mexico north. Apologies to the Mexicans. Cage asks if he is speaking English. He says to spit the marbles out of his mouth. Next week Sir Lancelot, bring all you have, because you will not make it to Hard Justice.

A fan in a Sting mask attacks Cage! That sneaky JJ! He and Steiner beat down Cage in the crowd. Cornette is pissed about this as the show ends.

Final Thoughts: While not a strong wrestling show, they did a lot of angle development and build for the PPV. Solid show this week.

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