The ECW eXperience 8.29.06

The ECW eXperience by J.D. Dunn August 29, 2006 Live from Reading, Penn. Your hosts are Joey Styles and Taz. Paul Heyman says that he’s been pushed to such extremes that he now has to fight Sabu in the middle of the ring. Apparently, Vince McMahon scrapped the original plan and booked this match and wouldn’t you just know it would involve the owner versus the rebel wrestler? Rob Van Dam vs. Hardcore Holly. Van Dam starts out strong with a reverse monkey flip and that spinning kick off the apron that he does. Holly goes for the Alabama Slam but decides on tossing Van Dam to the floor to take over. Van Dam comes back with a spin kick in the corner. These guys look like they’re going at half speed in there. Rolling Thunder sets up the Five-Star Frogsplash…but Holly rolls out of the way. Holly grabs chair but misses. Normally, Van Dam would hit a Van Daminator on the other side, but Holly doesn’t hold the chair up, so Van Dam just hits a normal spin kick. Awkward. Van Dam grabs the chair and wallops Holly for the DQ. Bleh. 3/4* Rene Dupree rides his little bike and claims to have found his extreme side. Much like Vito on “Smackdown,” it looks like they have a guy, they have a gimmick, but they have nothing to do with him. Big Show comes out to plug “Unforgiven” and challenge DX to a handicap match right here next week. CM Punk vs. Steven Richards. They exchange overhand wristlocks early. Punk avoids a charge, sending Richards to the floor. Punk dives on him with a tope, but Richards crotches him back on the inside. Richards gives Punk a taste of his own puro-stealing medicine by hitting Kobashi knees and a snap suplex for two. Punk elbows out of a bearhug and hits WELCOME TO CHICAGO, MOTHERFUCKER! No, that’s the name of the move. Richards tries a clothesline, but Punk hits the Uranage into the Anaconda Vice for the win. *1/4 Matt Striker comes out to complain about how everyone else is an idiot but him…especially the drunken Sandman, who is hopped up on giggle water. Well, Sandman doesn’t care if you denigrate him, but he’ll be damned if he’s going to let you talk bad about beer. Sandy storms down, but Striker tosses his chalkboard on him and staples his head. Kelly Kelly finds Balls Mahoney and shows him her goodies because she’s an expeditionist. Taz and Styles announce that Kurt Angle has been released and wish him well. You know, with Batista and Bobby Lashley holding down the top babyface spots on Smackdown, Chris Benoit could easily slide into Kurt’s spot on ECW and not be missed. Extreme Rules: Sabu vs. Paul Heyman (w/Security Enforcers). Whenever the heel manager/GM challenges the rebel to a match, he always has a plan B. Not that you needed me to tell you that. Security runs interference for Heyman, pummeling Sabu. He fights them off, but the Big Show saunters down. Sabu DDTs him on the floor. They finally corner him and lay in an EXTREME beatdown. Heyman goes into full Paul E. Dangerously mode, punching Sabu’s bloody face once and then dancing around showing everyone the blood on his hand. They set some tables up, but Rob Van Dam runs in and stops Show from press slamming Sabu through them. Show misses a swing, allowing Van Dam to hit the Van Daminator. Show’s out, and Van Dam takes out the Enforcers, so Sabu tries to springboard into a splash on Heyman who is set up on the tables. Show spears Sabu in mid-air, though. Hardcore Holly runs in and attacks RVD, allowing Show to hit Sabu with the shinni no make backbreaker. He tosses Heyman on top, giving Paul the win. I’m as shocked as you are, which is probably not at all. This felt like a Vince McMahon match with Paul Heyman booking, which is much better than the other way around. ** Final Thoughts: Well, after a few weeks of getting better, the show certainly hit a plateau (if not another downturn). As with “Raw,” they seem intent on pushing “Unforgiven” hard, which means everyone but the Big Show has to tread water for a few more weeks. Extreme yawn.